{"id":9036,"date":"2017-12-06T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2017-12-06T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sites-stage.familylife.com\/flministries\/?p=9036"},"modified":"2017-12-06T00:00:00","modified_gmt":"2017-12-06T00:00:00","slug":"becoming-a-mom-a-process-of-new-discovery","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/articles\/topics\/parenting\/essentials\/mothers\/becoming-a-mom-a-process-of-new-discovery\/","title":{"rendered":"Becoming a Mom \u2013 A Process of New Discovery"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>

March 2008<\/p>\n

By the time my husband, David, and I celebrated our fourth anniversary, our newlywed relationship was solid both spiritually and relationally, so we knew it was time to begin our familial legacy. Now I\u2019m happy to say that on May 4, we\u2019re expecting our first child\u2014a son, Benjamin Robert Beasley\u2014to make an entrance into the world.<\/p>\n

I am now in my seventh month of pregnancy, watching the weeks tick by. Sometimes these last few weeks appear to be long and burdensome like walking in deep mud; other times they seem blurry, like objects you see while rolling down a hill. As you can probably imagine, there have been a lot of changes in my life, and I\u2019ve struggled with them more than I thought I would.<\/p>\n

I can honestly say pregnancy has been the most difficult yet fascinating experience of my life. Like all new expectant mothers, I\u2019ve had thoughts of fear\u2014health concerns, life and death issues, \u201cwhat if\u201d scenarios. But I think one of the most difficult battles for me has been the fear of losing my identity.<\/p>\n

David and I made the decision early on that the best choice for our family would be for me to quit my job and stay home with our children. We will have to make some financial sacrifices, but it is possible. In my heart, I know that this is most definitely the best decision we can make, but I would be lying if I said I haven\u2019t struggled with the thought of leaving my job as a writer and editor at FamilyLife. I have found a great deal of fulfillment in reaching marriages and families through the Internet, and to leave that is like leaving a piece of my heart.<\/p>\n

The Inner Battle<\/h2>\n

There was a tug-of-war going on in my mind as I battled out the pros and cons of leaving my job. One side of me overflowed with joy that I have the honor and privilege to stay home with my children. I know I\u2019ll be there to hear my baby\u2019s first words and see his first steps. I\u2019ll have the freedom to take him to the park and the zoo, and I won\u2019t have to worry about who\u2019s going to care for him when he\u2019s sick or how we\u2019re going to afford childcare.<\/p>\n

The other side of me, however, turned inward, wondering what was going to happen to me and my contribution to the work of the Kingdom. As a believer, I have an overwhelming passion and commitment to spread the gospel, share principles from God\u2019s Word, and participate in ministry on a larger level than my own home.<\/p>\n

I realize that there will be opportunities to use my skills from home in many different ways, but reality tells me that I won\u2019t have much time for regular projects and duties like I had before, especially early on. I kept hearing the warnings of other moms echoing in my mind:<\/p>\n