{"id":8773,"date":"2013-11-18T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2013-11-18T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sites-stage.familylife.com\/flministries\/?p=8773"},"modified":"2013-11-18T00:00:00","modified_gmt":"2013-11-18T00:00:00","slug":"stop-overindulging-your-children","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/articles\/topics\/parenting\/foundations\/character-development\/stop-overindulging-your-children\/","title":{"rendered":"Stop Overindulging Your Children"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>

What do your children really need<\/em> from you?\u00a0Love, guidance, shelter, food, clothing, medical care, and an education.<\/p>\n

That\u2019s it.<\/p>\n

Everything else is a want<\/em>, a luxury: video games, gadgets, phones, the latest fashion\u2014whatever new item their friends have.<\/p>\n

Today, far too many parents fall for the \u201cnag factor.\u201d They know their kids are bombarded by ads telling them to buy certain products and that many parents are buying those products for their children.\u00a0They know the pressure that comes from their children\u2019s peers, and so they buy their kids far more \u201cstuff\u201d than they can even use, all in the hope that their children will fit in and be accepted by their peers.<\/p>\n

According to a recent survey of youth commissioned by the Center for a New American Dream, the average 12- to 17-year-old who asks a parent for products will ask nine times until the parents finally give in. For parents of tweens, the problem is particularly severe\u2014more than 10 percent of 12- to 13-year-olds admit to asking their parents more than 50 times for products they\u2019ve seen advertised. Kids have learned if they nag enough for long enough, parents will give in.<\/p>\n

Parents, stop falling for the nag factor.<\/p>\n

Refuse to overindulge your kids<\/h2>\n

Sadly, our self-absorbed society has told parents to help their kids feel good about themselves, that it\u2019s the parents\u2019 duty to make their children happy. But underneath it all, kids don\u2019t need parents who make them happy. They need parents who will make them capable.<\/p>\n

Dr. Connie Dawson, co-author of How Much Is Enough<\/em>, writes:<\/p>\n

When parents give children too much stuff that costs money, do things for children that they can do for themselves, do not expect children to do chores, do not have good rules, and let children run the family, parents are overindulging.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Here are some other signs of overindulgence. As you read them, watch for your weak spot:<\/p>\n

1.\u00a0Giving them things or experiences that are not appropriate for their age or their interests:<\/em><\/p>\n