{"id":8609,"date":"2013-08-26T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2013-08-26T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sites-stage.familylife.com\/flministries\/?p=8609"},"modified":"2013-08-26T00:00:00","modified_gmt":"2013-08-26T00:00:00","slug":"4-reminders-for-the-directionally-challenged","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/articles\/topics\/marriage\/archived-content\/marriage-memo\/4-reminders-for-the-directionally-challenged\/","title":{"rendered":"4 Reminders for the Directionally Challenged"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"bsf_rt_marker\" fetchpriority=\"high\"><\/div><p>Some would call me &#8220;directionally-challenged.&#8221; While my husband, Jim, seems to know where he is at all times, I have difficulty following a map or someone&#8217;s directions. I&#8217;ve been lost more often than I&#8217;d like to admit.<\/p>\n<p>It happened again when I went to visit a new friend who lives in the country. She gave me specific instructions to her home. I scribbled them on a piece of paper: &#8221; &#8230; You&#8217;ll end up on a dirt road and will eventually see an old bridge. Take an immediate left\u2014our house will be on the left.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>About an hour later I was driving to my friend&#8217;s and enjoying the country landscape: massive farms, hay bales, countless barking dogs. I spotted a beautiful old bridge and stopped to take the picture you see here. A recent winter storm had left some ice and snow on it, and some tree limbs partially covered the muddy road ahead.<\/p>\n<p>I continued on until a tree blocked the way. Thinking I had driven too far, I tried to call my friend on my cell phone but was in a dead zone. All I saw was the feared message, &#8220;Call not allowed.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>After turning around, once again I approached the beautiful old bridge. The phone rang. Yes, the same one that wouldn&#8217;t work just minutes before.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Where are you?&#8221; my friend asked.<\/p>\n<p>I explained my dilemma.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Oh, I can see you!&#8221; she said.<\/p>\n<p>I was dumbfounded. &#8220;See me? Are you looking down from a ridge?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;No, I&#8217;m looking from a window in my house.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>That&#8217;s when I realized that I had missed one little turn immediately after the old bridge. That one small oversight had made a big difference.<\/p>\n<h2 style=\"font-size: 30px;margin-bottom:15px;line-height:1.1em\">Country roads and marriage<\/h2>\n<p>As a writer for FamilyLife, I&#8217;ve interviewed a lot of people about how God moved in their marriages. From them I&#8217;ve realized how easy it is to miss an important turn in a marriage relationship. At times don&#8217;t we all forget the simplest directions?<\/p>\n<p>Here are four reminders for fellow travelers\u2014those driving down unfamiliar country roads or whizzing on the highway of married life:<\/p>\n<h3 style=\"font-size: 24px;line-height: 28px;font-weight:500;margin-bottom: 8px\">1. Overconfidence is not a good thing.<\/h3>\n<p><em>&#8220;Pride goes before destruction.&#8221; Proverbs 16:18<\/em><\/p>\n<p>As I left home to see my new friend, I had foolishly believed that my scribbled notes were totally right, that I could not possibly get lost. Being too confident is not a good thing.<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;ve seen this truth not only in my personal life, but also as I&#8217;ve written stories about changed lives. There seems to be a common thread in all of these stories\u2014the thought that, <em>This will never happen to me!<\/em><\/p>\n<p>In the article, <a href=\"\/articles\/topics\/marriage\/troubled-marriage\/saving-a-marriage\/the-lost-decade\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">&#8220;The Lost Decade,&#8221;<\/a> Mike and Pam Calvert describe the first 13 years of their marriage as a dream come true. But things began to change after they befriended a couple from their church.<\/p>\n<p>Mike began developing an inappropriate friendship with the wife. But when Pam told him the&nbsp; relationship wasn&#8217;t right, he became angry, saying it was her problem. They began to grow more and more isolated, and less than two years later, the Calverts were divorced.<\/p>\n<p>Watch out if you begin to think, <em>I will never be unfaithful<\/em> or, <em>I could never do that to my spouse<\/em>.<\/p>\n<h3 style=\"font-size: 24px;line-height: 28px;font-weight:500;margin-bottom: 8px\">2. You will reap the consequences of your actions.<\/h3>\n<p><em>Thus says the Lord God: Because you have forgotten me and cast me behind your back, you yourself must bear the consequences &#8230;&#8221; Ezekiel 23:35<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Scott Jennings never dreamed that he would cross the line and be unfaithful to Sherry. But somehow it happened. Scott turned to a woman at work for a listening ear, and that led to an inappropriate friendship and emotional attachment, which led to infidelity. The story of his shattered marriage is told in <a href=\"\/articles\/topics\/marriage\/troubled-marriage\/saving-a-marriage\/he-led-a-double-life\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">&#8220;He Lived a Double Life.&#8221;<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Consider the consequences of your actions, in the big and small decisions of life. Author Stephen Covey puts it this way: &#8220;While we are free to choose our actions, we are not free to choose the consequences of our actions.&#8221;<\/p>\n<h3 style=\"font-size: 24px;line-height: 28px;font-weight:500;margin-bottom: 8px\">3. God wants us to follow all of the directions that He gives for life (His Word).<\/h3>\n<p><em>&#8220;So you shall remember and do all my commandments, and be holy to your God.&#8221; Numbers 15:40<\/em><\/p>\n<p>When Hal Walker&#8217;s 32-year-old wife woke up from a coma, she had no memory of her family. Many of Hal&#8217;s friends suggested that he divorce Beth. In the article <a href=\"\/articles\/topics\/marriage\/staying-married\/commitment\/she-didnt-know-she-was-married\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">&#8220;She Didn&#8217;t Know She Was Married,&#8221;<\/a> he describes his decision as simple: He knew God hated divorce, and he knew he didn&#8217;t have biblical grounds to end the marriage. For more than 20 years he has stood by Beth rebuilding his marriage.<\/p>\n<p>Regardless of where life takes us, God meant for everything in His Word to be followed. His directions matter.<\/p>\n<h3 style=\"font-size: 24px;line-height: 28px;font-weight:500;margin-bottom: 8px\">4. It&#8217;s never too late to turn around.<\/h3>\n<p><em>&#8220;God-defiers are always in trouble; God-affirmers find themselves loved every time they turn around.&#8221; Psalm 32:10 (The Message)<\/em><\/p>\n<p>After 34 years of marriage, Lamar Sims told his wife, June, that he wanted a divorce: &#8220;I don&#8217;t love you. I don&#8217;t need you. I don&#8217;t want you.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>In the article <a href=\"\/articles\/topics\/marriage\/challenges\/spiritually-mismatched\/her-husband-wouldnt-speak-to-her-for-three-years\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">&#8220;Her Husband Wouldn&#8217;t Speak to Her for Three Years,&#8221;<\/a> June says that she still loved her husband and didn&#8217;t want to end their marriage. Angered by her refusal to grant a divorce, Lamar stopped talking to her. So she continued living with Lamar\u2014in silence\u2014and waited for God to act. Three long years later, God answered her prayers.<\/p>\n<p>It&#8217;s never too late to turn around on a dirt road &#8230; or in a dying marriage. Nothing is impossible for God.<\/p>\n<h2 style=\"font-size: 30px;margin-bottom:15px;line-height:1.1em\">Prone to wander<\/h2>\n<p>I know better than to vow that I won&#8217;t get lost again. Like the old hymn says, I am &#8220;prone to wander.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>But the next time that I lose my way, I want to remember that God really does see me. And He is ready and able to help (Psalm 46:1).<\/p>\n<hr>\n<p><em>Copyright \u00a9 2013 by FamilyLife. All rights reserved.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s never too late to turn around a dying marriage.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":90,"featured_media":125171,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"none","_seopress_titles_title":"4 Reminders for the Directionally Challenged","_seopress_titles_desc":"It's never too late to turn around a dying 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