{"id":8219,"date":"2016-01-14T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2016-01-14T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sites-stage.familylife.com\/flministries\/?p=8219"},"modified":"2016-01-14T00:00:00","modified_gmt":"2016-01-14T00:00:00","slug":"how-to-write-a-love-note","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/articles\/topics\/marriage\/staying-married\/romance-and-sex\/how-to-write-a-love-note\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Write a Love Note"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"bsf_rt_marker\" fetchpriority=\"high\"><\/div><p>Love letters. Even the least &#8220;write&#8221;-brained of you can make your beloved melt with a few words from the heart on paper. That alone sets it apart: Your computer can&#8217;t fry it or send it to the wrong person, and it may be saved for a great memory. If you need inspiration, think of the way the writers of Song of Solomon felt as they read of their lovers&#8217; appreciation on paper. Is it getting warm in here?<\/p>\n<h3 style=\"font-size: 24px;line-height: 28px;font-weight:500;margin-bottom: 8px\">1. Pray.<\/h3>\n<p>Nobody knows your spouse and how he or she is best loved like God. Pray that He&#8217;ll enable you to love and honor your mate well.<\/p>\n<h3 style=\"font-size: 24px;line-height: 28px;font-weight:500;margin-bottom: 8px\">2. Make a list.<\/h3>\n<p>Start with three categories: Things I like and love about you; Things you do for me and our family that I appreciate; and Memories. Tips:<\/p>\n<ul style=\"margin: 0 0 15px 1.5em\">\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 8px\">Try to think both in detail and about the big picture.<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 8px\">Include the past, the present, and the future.<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 8px\">Remember times when you&#8217;ve been emotionally moved by your spouse, what it was about your spouse that prompted such feeling, and how you&#8217;d describe that emotion.<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 8px\">What sets your spouse apart?<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 8px\">What did God create in your spouse that makes an excellent match for you?<\/li>\n<li style=\"padding-bottom: 8px\">How is your world different because you have this person?<\/li>\n<li>What do you see in your husband or wife that he or she may not see?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3 style=\"font-size: 24px;line-height: 28px;font-weight:500;margin-bottom: 8px\">3. Determine what you want to say.<\/h3>\n<p>What do you want your spouse to know as a result of reading this? For example, you might long to communicate, &#8220;I love you deeply. I am committed to you. I appreciate you. I&#8217;ve wanted to do something special and romantic for you.&#8221;<\/p>\n<h3 style=\"font-size: 24px;line-height: 28px;font-weight:500;margin-bottom: 8px\">4. Don&#8217;t neglect presentation.<\/h3>\n<p>Where, when, and how would this be the most meaningful? Should you mail it? Present it on a special date? Read it in a nostalgic location? Play a CD you&#8217;ve compiled? Do you want to convey your words on special stationery (write a few drafts first!), spray it with perfume (lightly, okay?), seal it with wax, wrap it in ribbon, or even frame it?&nbsp;Is there a poem, Scripture verse, quote, or are there song lyrics that express your love perfectly? (Allow these extras only limited real estate on your paper. Don&#8217;t let someone else serenade your beloved entirely.)<\/p>\n<p>Would you prefer to memorize your letter, looking your spouse in the eye as you share your heart with him or her?<\/p>\n<h2 style=\"font-size: 30px;margin-bottom:15px;line-height:1.1em\">Elements of a love letter<\/h2>\n<p><strong><em>Greeting.<\/em><\/strong> Date your letter, then use a knockout greeting that fits your relationship\u2014&#8221;To the love of my life,&#8221; &#8220;To my perfect partner,&#8221; &#8220;To the one I always dreamed of,&#8221; or even the classic &#8220;To my wife.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>Intro: This is why I&#8217;m writing.<\/em><\/strong> Honestly express that who your spouse is has compelled you to write and why. And do it confidently! Timid, &#8220;You probably don&#8217;t feel this way &#8230;&#8221; words diminish what you&#8217;re saying and the person to whom you&#8217;re saying them.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>Body.<\/em><\/strong> Use your list above to lavishly honor and adore your mate. Articulate your emotion, commitment, and God-fueled love for them.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>A memorable exit.<\/em><\/strong> You might leave on a note of commitment, saying in a sense, &#8220;This doesn&#8217;t end here!&#8221; Some examples: &#8220;I still do,&#8221; &#8220;Still yours and loving it!&#8221;, &#8220;Can&#8217;t wait to grow old with you,&#8221; &#8220;You still captivate me,&#8221; or &#8220;You&#8217;re still the one.&#8221; Or you might try expressing the depth or breadth of your love: &#8220;You have my heart.&#8221; While you&#8217;re at it, reread your letter out loud to make sure what was in your head came out of your pen.<\/p>\n<div class=\"fl-article-cta\"><div class=\"fl-article-cta-wrapper\"><a class='fl-article-cta-button' style='margin-top: 15px; visibility: visible; background-color: #f3bd48 !important;' target='_blank' href='https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/learn\/the-nearly-complete-guide-to-better-married-sex\/' data-color-override='false' data-hover-color-override='false' data-hover-text-color-override='#fff'><span>Can sex in Christian marriage be spectacular? See our online course!<i class='fa fas fa-long-arrow-right'><\/i><\/span> <\/a> <\/div> <\/div>\n<h2 style=\"font-size: 30px;margin-bottom:15px;line-height:1.1em\">Things to avoid<\/h2>\n<p><strong><em>Don&#8217;t type it.&nbsp;<\/em><\/strong>Unless your handwriting can&#8217;t be interpreted by anyone but you, the handwritten element is unmatched in personalization and sentimentality. Even if you&#8217;ll write more when you type, remember that the labor of writing something out is part of the unique expression of a love note (if you must, type it and then copy it by hand). While you&#8217;re at it, nix the notebook paper or anything else with lines. Think romance.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>Don&#8217;t use words that aren&#8217;t yours.&nbsp;<\/em><\/strong>Your spouse is scripturally one flesh with you \u2026 don&#8217;t underestimate his or her knowledge of you and your sneaky factor! Genuine feeling is part of the power of a love letter. And creativity, even when it&#8217;s not as great as someone else&#8217;s, expresses your unique, personal desire to honor your mate. Don&#8217;t avoid cheesy words entirely (most of us are longing for a little sappiness), but keep it authentic, in your own voice, and avoid clich\u00e9s that might cheapen what you&#8217;re saying. Key point here:&nbsp;<em>A love letter is meaningful in part because it puts in hard copy how you feel about him or her in particular.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong><em>Don&#8217;t put it where your object of affection won&#8217;t find it before next year&#8217;s Valentine&#8217;s Day<\/em><\/strong>\u2026 and someone else might. Enough said.<\/p>\n<p><em><strong>Don&#8217;t use too much humor (especially sarcasm), graphic intimacy, or reference to tough times.<\/strong><\/em> Remember, even best intentions can be misunderstood, particularly depending on the reader&#8217;s state of mind. Create a mood while you&#8217;re writing\u2014turn down the lights, set out the candles, turn on the soft music\u2014and then re-create that mood on paper with the warm, intimate words you use. As for apologies, at times they&#8217;re appropriate in a love letter, but don&#8217;t let your letter take on a downward tone.<\/p>\n<p><strong><em>Don&#8217;t focus on yourself.<\/em><\/strong> Remember that this is essentially in praise of your mate, your marriage, your love, and the God who&#8217;s brought you together and done something beautiful.<\/p>\n<p>Hopefully your intimidation has diminished by now! If you&#8217;re still skittish, remember: Though loving well does involve skill and careful thought, it isn&#8217;t for the elite. The most meaningful of love letters are simply true, humble expressions of the heart.<\/p>\n<hr>\n<p><em>Copyright \u00a92013 by FamilyLife. All rights reserved.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"\/articles\/topics\/marriage\/staying-married\/romance-and-sex\/the-legacy-of-a-love-letter\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Read about the legacy of the love letter<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The most meaningful of love letters are simply true, humble expressions of the heart. Learn about the elements of a love letter and things to avoid.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":90,"featured_media":15887,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"%%title%% | FamilyLife\u00ae","_seopress_titles_desc":"The most meaningful of love letters are simply true, humble expressions of the heart. 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