{"id":160692,"date":"2023-10-09T09:43:27","date_gmt":"2023-10-09T14:43:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/?p=160692"},"modified":"2023-10-09T09:43:27","modified_gmt":"2023-10-09T14:43:27","slug":"are-we-equally-yoked","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/articles\/topics\/marriage\/getting-married\/are-we-equally-yoked\/","title":{"rendered":"Are We Equally Yoked?"},"content":{"rendered":"
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There\u2019s a question we want you and your fianc\u00e9 to soberly consider: \u201cAre we going in the same spiritual direction?\u201d In other words, are both of you authentic Christians who are pursuing God and spiritual maturity? <\/p>\n\n\n

What does it mean to be equally yoked?<\/h2>\n\n\n

Because marriage is a spiritual relationship, your spiritual compatibility will influence the quality of your relationship more than any other factor. Consider this passage from 2 Corinthians 6:14\u201315: <\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? <\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Most of us are only familiar with egg yolks, so this passage can sound pretty strange. A yoke is a wooden crosspiece that is fastened over the necks of two animals (typically oxen) and attached to a plow or cart that they pull as a team. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

According to Deuteronomy 22:10<\/a>, God\u2019s people weren\u2019t allowed to yoke, say, a donkey and an ox, because if one animal was stronger than the other, one was often pulling the weight while the other couldn\u2019t keep up. Plus the plow would cut through the ground erratically, and sometimes ineffectively, because the two animals were out of sync. It was an inhumane match of ability and disposition that didn\u2019t lead to a team being happy and effective in their work together.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n

The challenges of being unequally yoked<\/h2>\n\n\n

Tracking with this metaphor, if Jesus is at the center of your life, why would you want to be hitched to someone who has nothing in common with you spiritually? If you are \u201cunequally yoked\u201d in your marriage, sooner or later you\u2019ll pull against each other, and that will lead to heartbreak, grief, and frustration. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Second Corinthians 6:14\u201315<\/a> warns Christians about building their lives with someone who has clashing values and goals. Building relationships on God\u2019s values, trust, and love is essential.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Another warning is given in James: \u201cDo you not know that friendship with the world is hostility toward God? Therefore whoever wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God\u201d (James 4:4<\/a> NASB).\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Trust me, it can be hard enough to prevent our hearts from being lured into \u201cloving the world\u201d (being controlled by pride, greed, and divisiveness) even when your spouse is also pursuing God and encouraging you. God created marriage, and its maximum satisfaction can only be found when you both have a growing relationship with Him. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

When Christians marry non-Christians, they usually experience a growing, unique frustration after marriage because: <\/p>\n\n\n