{"id":313956,"date":"2025-04-08T07:00:00","date_gmt":"2025-04-08T11:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/how-to-create-a-rule-of-life-for-your-home-jennifer-pepito\/"},"modified":"2025-06-17T11:03:26","modified_gmt":"2025-06-17T15:03:26","slug":"how-to-create-a-rule-of-life-for-your-home-jennifer-pepito","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/how-to-create-a-rule-of-life-for-your-home-jennifer-pepito\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Create a &#8220;Rule of Life&#8221; for Your Home: Jennifer Pepito"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>In this podcast episode, Jennifer Pepito returns to discuss creating a &#8220;sacred home&#8221; and how families can live intentionally and peacefully by establishing routines and habits that honor God and foster connection. The conversation begins with an exploration of the concept of a &#8220;sacred home,&#8221; which Jennifer clarifies is not about perfection but about setting a home apart for the Lord, even in the midst of chaos. She reflects on her own journey of parenting and the importance of establishing habits that promote peace and spiritual growth within the home.<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer introduces the idea of a &#8220;rule of life,&#8221; which she likens to a family mission statement, offering structure and guidance for daily living. Drawing inspiration from the Rule of St. Benedict, she and her husband created a family mission statement that helped them focus on their core values\u2014like a love for nature, missions, and time spent together\u2014while making decisions in line with those values. They prioritized certain family essentials and, throughout their life together, chose to sacrifice materialism and structured activities in favor of a simpler, more meaningful life that aligned with their spiritual beliefs.<\/p>\n<p>The conversation dives deeper into specific habits that can make a home more peaceful and sacred, beginning with the first: the habit of work. Jennifer emphasizes the importance of teaching children the value of hard work and how this principle can foster not only practical skills but also spiritual maturity. Through examples like her own family\u2019s tradition of hard work in manual labor, she explains how work is a reflection of one&#8217;s spiritual life and relationship with God.<\/p>\n<p>The podcast also touches on the importance of spiritual practices like prayer and Bible study, suggesting that they are not always about immediate joy but about the discipline of showing up regularly and putting in the work. Jennifer points out that habits are the framework through which values like spirituality, responsibility, and community are lived out in daily life. She encourages moms and dads to be intentional with their time, to avoid distractions like social media, and to practice simple actions\u2014like eye contact, hugs, and spending time outside\u2014to create meaningful connections with their children.<\/p>\n<p>The discussion moves to focus on the necessity of balance in family life. Jennifer, despite her busy schedule as an entrepreneur and mother of six children, emphasizes the importance of pacing oneself and not overcommitting. She encourages listeners to write down their vision for family life and to regularly audit how their time aligns with their goals. Jennifer advises moms to avoid feelings of guilt, offering practical solutions for making time for connection, including a &#8220;connection challenge&#8221; that includes simple actions like giving your children a 30-second hug or looking them in the eye for 20 seconds a day.<\/p>\n<p>The episode also addresses the needs of working moms, who may feel torn between their jobs and their families. Jennifer emphasizes that it&#8217;s possible to nurture both roles, offering the &#8220;connection challenge&#8221; as a simple way to reclaim precious time with children. She encourages mothers not to feel guilty for needing to work outside the home, but to ensure they are creating meaningful connections with their children and maintaining balance.<\/p>\n<p>The episode ends with a profound reflection on the importance of family legacy. Jennifer and her co-host stress that the most important thing parents can do is create a godly legacy that will endure beyond their lives. Ultimately, it\u2019s about creating a life centered on Christ and prioritizing relationships over material pursuits. They encourage listeners to embrace small, manageable habits that will help build a sacred, peaceful home, one step at a time.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>How do you and your family create a &#8220;rule of life&#8221; to guide daily habits and spiritual growth? Author Jennifer Pepito shares how easy it is to do.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":47000,"featured_media":312569,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"audio","audio_file":"https:\/\/traffic.omny.fm\/d\/clips\/cbd16f10-ac60-4f09-b4df-b15400ce35aa\/33aaac7e-3581-4e21-a3df-b154011ba58c\/2219a71b-2829-41c9-8b2b-b2ab011324cb\/audio.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:24:48","filesize":"22.74M","filesize_raw":"","date_recorded":"2025-04-08 07:00:00","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2838],"tags":[],"podcast_series":[10971],"cwp_profile":[10970],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-313956","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-mothers","podcast_series-sacred-home-jennifer-pepito","cwp_profile-jennifer-pepito","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2025\/02\/image_bbee74.jpg?w=1024","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/313956\/how-to-create-a-rule-of-life-for-your-home-jennifer-pepito","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/313956\/how-to-create-a-rule-of-life-for-your-home-jennifer-pepito","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"xmQYh6Ldha\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/how-to-create-a-rule-of-life-for-your-home-jennifer-pepito\/\">How to Create a &#8220;Rule of Life&#8221; for Your Home: Jennifer Pepito<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/how-to-create-a-rule-of-life-for-your-home-jennifer-pepito\/embed\/#?secret=xmQYh6Ldha\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;How to Create a &#8220;Rule of Life&#8221; for Your Home: Jennifer Pepito&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"xmQYh6Ldha\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"secondline_imported_guid":["2219a71b-2829-41c9-8b2b-b2ab011324cb"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/traffic.omny.fm\/d\/clips\/cbd16f10-ac60-4f09-b4df-b15400ce35aa\/33aaac7e-3581-4e21-a3df-b154011ba58c\/2219a71b-2829-41c9-8b2b-b2ab011324cb\/audio.mp3"],"duration":["00:24:48"],"filesize":["22.74M"],"_thumbnail_id":["312569"],"show_notes":["<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/jenniferpepito\">Follow Jennifer Pepito on Instagram<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li>Learn more about \"<a href=\"https:\/\/thepeacefulpress.com\/pages\/restoration-home-community\">The Restoration Home<\/a>\" community, listen to Jennifer's podcast, and find her book, \"<a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product\/https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product\/habits-for-a-sacred-home-9-practices-from-history-to-anchor-and-restore-modern-families\">Habits for a Sacred Home<\/a>\" on our shop.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/?s=resurrection+eggs&amp;post_type=product\">Experience the Easter story with Resurrection Eggs<\/a> and explore more resources in our shop<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<hr \/>\n<ul>\n<li>Find resources from this podcast at <a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/radio-resources\/\">shop.familylife.com<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/past-radio-resources\/\">See resources from our past podcasts.<\/a><\/li>\n<li>Find more content and resources on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/app\/\">FamilyLife's app<\/a>!<\/li>\n<li>Help others find FamilyLife. Leave a review on <a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303\">Apple Podcast<\/a> or <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm?si=d6dfa8d2415f4750\">Spotify<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li>Check out all the FamilyLife's podcasts on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/familylife-podcast-network\/\">FamilyLife Podcast Network<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/fl2025-04-08.pdf"],"transcript_content":["<p><strong><em>FamilyLife Today<\/em><\/strong><strong><sup>\u00ae<\/sup><\/strong> <strong>with Dave and Ann Wilson - Web Version Transcript<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>This content has been generated by an artificial intelligence language model. While we strive for accuracy and quality, please note that the information provided will most likely not be entirely error-free or up-to-date. We recommend independently verifying the content with the originally-released audio. This transcript is provided for your personal use and general information purposes only. References to conferences, resources, or other special promotions may be obsolete. We do not assume any responsibility or liability for the use or interpretation of this content.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>How to Create a \u201cRule of Life\u201d for Your Home<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Guest:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Jennifer Pepito<\/p>\n<p>From the series:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Sacred Home (Day 2 of 3)<\/p>\n<p>Air date:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 April 8, 2025<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The face of God is always proximate\u2014He's always right there, smiling at me\u2014He likes me. I think that changed the trajectory of my parenting; because it is so easy\u2014and Christian parenting focused so much on behavior for so many years\u2014but God isn't up there always asking us to do something and kind of turning His back on us. He's not just giving us a list of projects; He's like with us.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, where we want to help you pursue the relationships that matter most. I'm Dave Wilson.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And I'm Ann Wilson. And you can find us at FamilyLifeToday.com. This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Alright. We started a conversation yesterday that I actually, Jennifer\u2014Jennifer Pepto is back with us\u2014I didn't see us going where we went yesterday.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 That wasn't planned, was it?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 We didn't get into the habits.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 No; it was great! We didn't get into the habits; but no, I thought sacred was going to be much cleaner. Even though I read your book\u2014and I know you don't say that\u2014<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u2014or unattainable, do you mean?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah, almost like something that's clean and tidy; and so I don't know what it is.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It's so perfect.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The temple of God: there's no corruption at all. And you're like, \u201cNo, I'm just a regular mom, with chaos going on every minute.\u201d But sacred means set apart. Do you feel like that when you're doing it? It's like, \u201cThis is crazy.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 We're talking about <em>Habits for a Sacred Home<\/em>, her book.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I think that's the beauty of it\u2014is that Jesus was perfect; His temple, Jesus Himself was perfect\u2014so we don't have to be; but we also have the power of God in us to keep making those steps towards more peace in our homes and more connection through these habits.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 So you've got the nine habits from the rule of life. Help our listeners understand: \u201cWhat's a rule of life\u201d? We don't walk around every day going, \u201cWhat's your rule of life?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I think it's the same thing as a family vision, or a family mission statement, or your family essentials.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Do you have a family vision or mission statement?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, we do.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh, we got to get that.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Are you kidding me? When I wrote this book\u2014and funny enough, we<\/p>\n<p>wrote a family mission statement when my third-born, he's 26 now, was a baby; he might've been a year or so\u2014we wrote down: \u201cWhat are our family essentials?\u201d We loved being in nature; we were very interested in mission work; we loved being together. Our whole life, as a family, we really focused on those essentials that we wrote down 25 years ago. Maintained: we lived as missionaries; we paid off homes; we lived in the country so we could have nature. We said, \u201cNo,\u201d to a lot of other things like big toys, or a lot of weekend structured or scheduled activities, so that we could pursue those essentials.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But the rule of life did come later. We would've called it something different, like a vision or essentials, until I started reading about St. Benedict and his rule of life.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 When Dave and I were in seminary, we were taking classes in how to help counsel people\u2014he was going to be a pastor\u2014but it was good for us to get into some of our own junk. In that time, I remember our prof asked us: \u201cWhat were the family rules and habits in your home?\u201d\u2014which was just interesting for us to think through: habits. He said, \u201cEvery single family has those; they can be healthy or unhealthy.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ours was sports\u2014it was about that simple\u2014it paid for college and did a lot of things. There was no spiritual [habits] in the home I grew up in, and really not in yours as well. So as we became married; and then, parents, we\u2019re like, \u201cWe got to change a whole legacy\/a whole heritage to something.\u201d We had to come up with a family mission statement, and vision, and values.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>So rule of life: you've got nine habits. You want to start with number one, or how do you want to do it?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well, there are habits of work, habits of prayer; and in some ways, they are more values. And then, the habits that you do are sort of how you live those values out in your life.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well, one of ours was work.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh, yeah; that was one of the values that you had, raising your kids.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 We sort of took our name\u2014Wilson\u2014and the \u201cW\u201d: \u201cWhat's the \u2018W\u2019 going to be?\u201d We're like, \u201cWe want to teach our children: \u2018Work matters; work under God; work hard.\u2019\u201d They were roofers; they were cement guys. It was like, \u201cWe want hard work, so you know how to do it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 But that's a habit for you guys too.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah, for sure. I love that you mentioned that first; because it\u2019s one of my favorite habits: \u201cIf we're not willing to work, we're not even going to have a spiritual life; because that, in itself, takes work.\u201d You don't necessarily experience the joy of His presence the first time you open the Bible. You don't necessarily experience the joy of His presence the first time you sing or take a walk in nature.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But if you don't put in the work to regularly be with God\u2014whether that is talking to Him while you wash the dishes, or make the dinner, or change the diaper\u2014you have to put in the work of turning your affection to God. Especially now, it's so much easier to go on Instagram or to listen to a podcast. It's so much easier to always be having someone talk at us, or entertain us, and not really talk to God. So right there, there's a habit that helps develop our spiritual lives.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I love that you mentioned teaching your kids to work\u2014because so many of us\u2014our motivation is really: \u201cHow can I help my kids love God, and love us, and be responsible adults?\u201d A lot of us, we're not necessarily moved by even a sacred home\u2014we're just practical\u2014we just need to get our kids raised. Work is a big part of that: \u201cCan your kids pick up after themselves?\u201d In my Peaceful Press homeschool curriculum, we actually include practical life skills.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 That\u2019s so smart.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It's great because it develops the motor skills that kids need to be able to write an essay. But if a child can write beautiful essays\u2014which, actually, AI can do too\u2014but they don't know how to make a meal, or do the dishes, or organize their clothes, they're going to have a hard time in life. You can pay someone to do those things, but you can also pay someone to write an essay. Having a balance of skills for children, as they're growing, I think is so important. And it teaches them to value\u2014if you know how to work\u2014then you value the money it costs to buy what you need. If you know how to work, then you will put in the effort to develop your spiritual life.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 That's really good.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Did you give your kids an allowance?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Never; we never had a lot of money. By the time we did have a little bit more affluence, I was like, \u201cThey're too old; they can just work for it.\u201d I loved it when my kids got jobs early. My third child had a job working construction when he was like 14 years old. I'd have to drive him to the job sites, but it was a great experience. He's an awesome dad and husband, and bought his first home at 25, because he knew how to work.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well, it's interesting to me that you have added some great\u2014like Edith Schaeffer\u2014why did you happen to connect these great biblical teachers and influencers with each of your habits?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh, that was so much fun, Ann. I felt sad for so many moms, who don't know who these people are; those are the women who shaped me as a young mom. I was lucky to be in this community of really intelligent, loving moms, who were always reading. And so, as a young mom, I read Elisabeth Elliot, Edith Schaeffer, and Amy Carmichael. I was reading all those books. But so many of the young moms today don't know who those people are, and those are our heroes. I feel like, when we have heroes, then we can have a vision for what we could be like.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>During Covid even, when we were running out of supplies\u2014it was like: \u201cWhere's the toilet paper?\u201d \u201cWhere's the eggs?\u201d\u2014I would think to myself, \u201cWhat would Betsie ten Boom do?\u201d Because I'd read Corrie\u2014I was reading <em>The Hiding Place<\/em> out loud to my children\u2014and I knew that she wouldn't sit there, whining about it. She would've given things for what they had. Those women became my heroes and really helped me become the mom that I wanted to be. I feel like introducing those women to moms today would give them more of a vision. A lot of very dismal heroes today; we don't have a lot of people to look up to.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah. Why did you\u2014you've included recipes, like that's important\u2014you have prayers; you have action steps. Why all of that, and why include recipes in it?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I am probably, sometimes, more well-known for my Peaceful Press curriculum. What we do, as we're learning together, is we make a recipe. If we're reading about Edith Schaeffer in Switzerland, we make Swiss Zopf bead; or we read about Sabina Wurmbrand, or even Corrie ten Boom\u2014read about what happened to the Jews during the Holocaust\u2014we'd make challah. It was just a special part of learning together: baking together or cooking something together.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I feel like, when you're in the kitchen, you're breaking bread\u2014I think you can see that in Scripture too\u2014that Jesus, when He wanted to build community, and when He wanted to, in a sense, even show love to people, they would break bread together\u2014it wasn't just a lesson; it was a gathering, a celebration. I feel like cooking together or baking together with our kids; and then, enjoying something, makes it more of a celebration.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 That\u2019s really sweet.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You're like the Christian Martha Stewart.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ooh!<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You've got an entrepreneurial spirit; were you like that as a little girl?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Have you guys ever heard of that philosophy that what you played at, as a child, shapes what you're supposed to do as an adult? I did actually start little businesses, which is funny. I was an all-in mother\u2014I've been very careful to not over-travel or things like that\u2014but I do actually love business. So yes, I did play store; I had restaurants; I sewed doll clothes and sold them\u2014really, little side subject.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It's kind of great to watch your kids and see the things that they do love to play with.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah; absolutely. And to honor that, one of the things that my homeschool curriculum is based off is called the Charlotte Mason Method. One of her big sayings is: \u201cChildren are born persons.\u201d I think that's really important, also, for families as they're thinking about: \u201cWhat is our rule of life?\u201d What's important to us is to, also, take a little bit of time to get to know your children\/to observe your children:\u2014<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWhat's important to them? What are they passionate about?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 we're all created in God's image. And so instead of trying to impose your image ideal on your children\u2014and this is where there is a little bit of Holy Spirit intuition\u2014because on the one hand, we have to have a vision for our family. But on the other hand, we have to recognize that our children are born persons and honor their unique calling and design.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>In our family, because we valued our rule of life, our essentials were: missions or time with God. But if we saw our children interested in something, we would try to find a class, or a tutor, or a mentor to help them develop those skills so that we could have that balance.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 So are they all completely different?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yes, so different.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Isn't it fun?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It is fun; it's amazing. I love\u2014it's like a painting or something\u2014there's so<\/p>\n<p>many different details and personalities.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Do you feel like\u2014a lot of them are adults now\u2014because of this value of work, do you feel like they're good workers?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah, they're actually all really good workers, really hard workers. The 16-year-old just got his second job working construction for somebody, and I love seeing how they enjoy working.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well, as you look at these habits\u2014and you have nine\u2014what one do you resonate with the most?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I'm guessing all of them.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well, for sure. Probably, the one that I resonate the most with is balance; and that's the last habit I talk about.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Wait, wait, wait, wait. You are one full-life schedule woman. Explain balance in your life, because you\u2019re doing everything.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah, I'm really careful actually. Are you about, I was telling you before the show started that I love the philosophy of the Monk Manual, where they have you set your goals based on being and doing. With my restoration home community, the first thing we do is have women write down two things:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u201cWhat do you want your children to remember about life in your home?\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u201cWhat kind of person do you want to be?\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>For me: I want to be present with my children; I want to be warm and loving; I want to be a good listener. So I pace myself with work; I don't grow as fast as maybe I could. I'm just turning to figure out what SEO means after ten years in an online business.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I think that, when you have a very clear vision of who you want to be, then it's easy to set goals that are sustainable. And the other thing\u2014once we have moms write down their vision or what they want their children to remember\u2014we actually have them start auditing their time. I think so many people don't get much done, because they're consuming way more than they're producing.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 So first, they're writing down their vision\u2014this is what you have all these women do\u2014and second\u2014<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 So then, we do a time audit. We actually spend a week, or even a month, just sort of tracking our time to see: \u201cOkay, I want my children to remember that, when they talk to me, I listened,\u201d \u201cI want my children to remember that I was a loving, responsive, warm mother.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But then\u2014if the way we live is like we organize all day; or we have them crying over their math; or we are constantly shuffling them around to different activities, where they don't even have any experience of us\u2014then we realize, \u201cOkay, my time audit says this...; my vision says this\u2026 How can I make them have more integrity? How can I make them align better?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>That's something I still do now: I'm constantly looking, like, \u201cOkay, here's how I'm spending my time.\u201d If I'm on my phone too much, I'm going to cut back; I have a phone-restriction thing, or I'll put my phone in a drawer for a day. I'm working, constantly adjusting my own life; because my vision is to be a safe space for my family. But sometimes, it's easy, if you go on Instagram, and you see what other people are doing or accomplishing, it's like, \u201cOh, I got to do more of that. I got to do more bread baking,\u201d \u201cI got to do more podcast recording,\u201d\u2014whatever you're looking at in the moment. It gets us off course of our vision.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But if we have the vision, and then we're tracking our time, you can make those two things align through a lot of other little habits that we talk about in the book.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Jennifer, I'm thinking of the working moms who feel so overwhelmed with their job. They're coming home, and they feel like they're exhausted; but they're giving their kids whatever they have left. They feel incredible guilt about that. Are they overwhelmed by just all the things we're saying?\u2014\u201cOkay, now I need to do this, and this, and this.\u201d How could we simplify it for that person?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ann, a homeschool mom can be just as guilty of checking out, and not connecting at all, because we can get into our own little schedule.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Really?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh, yeah; for sure. But in The Peaceful Press, we have this thing called \u201cThe Connection Challenge\u201d; and it's four simple steps; there's a free download. You look your children in the eyes for 20 seconds a day; you give them a 32<sup>nd<\/sup>-second hug; and then, if you can, spend 15 minutes reading aloud or playing outside together. Those four little things\u2014a working mom could do that\u2014just carve out a half hour of your time a day to connect with your kids.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But sometimes, also it's us taking a little authority over their time; because I think what happens more often is\u2014we maybe feel guilty, or we feel tired\u2014so we let them check out from us. Do you know what I mean? Because I think that's happening a lot more even I think moms probably want to check in with their kids, but they are lacking the authority or the confidence to make those efforts. There was a book called <em>Hold On to Your Kids<\/em> by Gordon Neufeld and Gabor Mat\u00e9. In that book, they talk a lot about how responsible adult behavior is the fruit of a connected family.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I have to get my pen out to write all this down.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You're going to write this down?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I totally am.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 We can go back and listen to the broadcast like other people.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I want it now, Dave. I want it now.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You\u2019re going to do\u2014even as you said, a 32<sup>nd<\/sup>-second hug\u2014<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It releases serotonin\u2014a 32<sup>nd<\/sup>-second hug releases serotonin\u2014helps regulate you and your child. You guys just talked about that with Ron and Nancy Deal,\u2014<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ron and Nan Deal, yes.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u2014that we're all trying to get regulated. And yet, just something as simple as a hug and some eye contact\u2014<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Look at you, listening to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>; way to go!<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It\u2019s great; what a great show.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 What a great rule of life! Everything you just said applies to, not just parenting, but marriage.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And it's not unattainable. I'm not asking people to live in a monastery and pray all day; it's just some simple things. Like even the nature aspect\u2014if you could just put your phone down and look at the sky for a few minutes a day with your kids\u2014that, in itself, would help regulate your body; help you connect with God; and give you some experience together that puts you in your relational circuits instead of in fight, flight, freeze.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And it's interesting too; because what we can do\u2014when we feel overwhelmed and stressed with our kids\u2014the easiest thing\u2014and I don't want you to feel guilty about me saying this, because we all do it\u2014is to put the TV on or to give our kids a device of some kind. But I'm telling you: this is good for you and your kids to just hug them and hold them; they might even fight it. What do you do with a teenager with that?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh, it was so sweet. We were walking in here, and my son was like\u2014he just put his hand on my shoulder\u2014and I was kind of like, \u201cDo you need something?\u201d\u2014because that used to be our interrupt rule; he'd put [his] hand [on my shoulder]. And he's like, \u201cNo, I was just praying for you. I feel like, if you start that, our teenagers want connection too.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It's their habits. They will take that habit into their own family in marriage. They're going to touch you; they're going to pray for you; they're going to look you in the eye. If you are raising a son who looks his wife in the eye, and hugs her for 30 seconds a day, that's victory, people! That is victory.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And I'm telling you: every parent right now is doing what Ann's doing\u2014they're pausing\u2014they're like, \u201cI got to write this down.\u201d And let me just say to you: if you want parenting help, we would love to help you\u2014we have a site just for you\u2014FamilyLife.com\/ParentingHelp. It's free; we put together resources. But I know what you're doing right now\u2014we're all doing that\u2014this is really practical life-changing parenting help, right?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah; one of the things that helped me recognize how important connection was\u2014learning to attune with God\u2014as I started processing through some of my own fears. I was molested as a child. My mom was a very busy farm wife; and probably didn't know how to show love, because she hadn't received a lot of love. In my childhood, there were a lot of moments, where I felt very alone. As an adult, I started just asking, \u201cJesus, can You show me where You were in this moment? Can You come and comfort me in this moment?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I've done that same thing; I think it's super healthy.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And the interesting thing is: my friend\u2014Monk Manual founder\u2014said, \u201cThe face of God is always proximate. And when you say, \u2018Jesus, can You come and be with me?\u2019 His back is not to me.\u201d Maybe this is like me imagining; maybe it's just my imagination.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well, God works in our imaginations.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And so, when I have an experience with Jesus, He's always right there, smiling at me; He likes me. I think that changed the trajectory of my parenting, because it is so easy\u2014and Christian parenting focused so much on behavior for so many years\u2014but God isn't up there always asking us to do something and kind of turning His back on us. He's not just giving us a list of projects; He's with us.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 He wants to be with us.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yes. I just read, I think in the Psalms, it says, \u201cThe Lord is pleased with His people.\u201d We are a joy to Him, and our children should be a joy to us. And if they're not, maybe it's because we aren't experiencing any joy with ourselves even, if we can't be with ourselves.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The habits of prayer, of work\u2014they're partly the fruit of attunement with God\u2014and we talked about this earlier yesterday. It's also, the more we\u2014put in the habit of just being quiet with the Lord, or putting our phones down, or being in nature, or hugging our kids\u2014the more we do those little sort of relational connection things, or attunement things, then the more we're going to be able to attune with our children. It's like we attune with God; we attune with our children. The habits start to fall into place; a lot of life does become more peaceful.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I understand how intense it is\u2014we just had our whole family staying with us for Christmas\u2014we had a two-and-a-half-year old toddler; we had an infant in the house. One afternoon, I babysat both of the little grand-babies so the adults could go out. And it's intense; you can't do anything but hold or take care of. I, thankfully, had an older daughter around to help me.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But even just the more we're settled with God, the more we can actually enjoy that season; because it will be over\u2014that intense season of feeling like you can never get everything done, or you're always behind the eight ball\u2014pretty soon, that'll be over. No one's going to look at you like your infant looks at you. No one's going to look at you with those eyes of adoration like your infant will. No one's going to enjoy you\u2014like my little grand baby, the two-and-a-half-year old, patted me on the back the other day; we were saying goodbye\u2014she's like, \u201cGrammy, you're always so sweet to me.\u201d No one expresses themselves like a small child.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 They're free.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You can complain your way through that season; or you could settle into it a little bit, recognize that it's going to be short and just enjoy it. It will be over, and it would be nice to not look back and have a bunch of regrets.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah. Here's what I'm thinking\u2014as a man, and as a husband, and a dad; and it's true for wives and moms\u2014of all the things that we do in our lives, what we've been talking about the last two days are the most important. It's our legacy; it's a godly legacy that God's called us to give to the next generation. It's more important than the job; it's more important than money; it's more important than the house. All the stuff\u2014that is important; that stuff's important: redoing my driveway, the roof, whatever; that matters\u2014but man, when I think of the things I think about so often, rather than pouring into my children to be men and women of God when they're adults, and raise men and women of God, that's all that matters.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And Dave, I would say this: we cannot do it apart from Jesus; He is the foundation. He is the One whom we find hope from, whom we find life from. As you said, Jennifer, He's always smiling at us. He loves us; He's cheering us on every day. And so, to go to Him\u2014and I know you're thinking, \u201cIt's too hard; I don't have time,\u201d\u2014but you can talk to Him all day long.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I don't know where you are in your relationship with Jesus, but can I just tell you that He loves you? You matter to Him more than you can even imagine. And so call out to Him for help\u2014He's always there\u2014He's always wanting to be with you to give you wisdom, discernment, energy, all the things you need. You might just need to pray that Jesus will help your kids sleep one night. It may not be every night, but one night; and He's there. He's with you. I think this is so good.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And I know you're thinking, \u201cHow do I get this life?\u201d You read <em>Habits for a Sacred Home<\/em>; it gives you nine habits. You're not going to be able to do them all today or tomorrow, but you're going to learn how to live like Jennifer's saying you guys live.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a donor-supported production of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry.<\/p>\n<p>Helping you pursue the relationships that matter most.<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019ve benefited from the <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs of producing them and making them available online?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Copyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2025 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n"],"_edit_lock":["1750172697:47000"],"_g_feedback_shortcode_1b2db0825169a225e4553b6dc1daba3789ef84f4":["\n\t\t\t\t[contact-field label=\"Name\" type=\"name\"  required=\"true\" \/]\n\t\t\t\t[contact-field label=\"Email\" type=\"email\" required=\"true\" \/]\n\t\t\t\t[contact-field label=\"Website\" type=\"url\" \/]\n\t\t\t\t[contact-field label=\"Message\" type=\"textarea\" \/]"],"_g_feedback_shortcode_atts_1b2db0825169a225e4553b6dc1daba3789ef84f4":["a:17:{s:2:\"to\";s:29:\"margaret.coyle@familylife.com\";s:7:\"subject\";s:91:\"[FamilyLife - A Cru Ministry] How to Create a \"Rule of Life\" for Your Home: Jennifer 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});\";s:18:\"current_block_list\";a:17:{i:0;s:14:\"uagb\/container\";i:1;s:12:\"core\/heading\";i:2;s:9:\"core\/html\";i:3;s:10:\"core\/group\";i:6;s:21:\"uagb\/advanced-heading\";i:7;s:14:\"uagb\/separator\";i:8;s:14:\"uagb\/icon-list\";i:9;s:20:\"uagb\/icon-list-child\";i:10;s:11:\"core\/search\";i:13;s:18:\"core\/legacy-widget\";i:16;s:10:\"uagb\/image\";i:17;s:17:\"core\/social-links\";i:18;s:16:\"core\/social-link\";i:19;s:14:\"core\/paragraph\";i:20;s:30:\"meta-box\/fl-conditional-blocks\";i:21;s:12:\"uagb\/buttons\";i:22;s:18:\"uagb\/buttons-child\";}s:8:\"uag_flag\";b:1;s:11:\"uag_version\";s:10:\"1776600200\";s:6:\"gfonts\";a:1:{s:7:\"Default\";a:2:{s:10:\"fontfamily\";s:7:\"Default\";s:12:\"fontvariants\";a:0:{}}}s:10:\"gfonts_url\";s:71:\"\/\/fonts.googleapis.com\/css?family=Default&subset=latin&display=fallback\";s:12:\"gfonts_files\";a:0:{}s:14:\"uag_faq_layout\";b:0;}"]},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2025\/02\/image_bbee74.jpg",1024,1024,true]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"Margaret","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/margaret-coylefamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"How do you and your family create a \"rule of life\" to guide daily habits and spiritual growth? Author Jennifer Pepito shares how easy it is to do.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/jenniferpepito\">Follow Jennifer Pepito on Instagram<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li>Learn more about \"<a href=\"https:\/\/thepeacefulpress.com\/pages\/restoration-home-community\">The Restoration Home<\/a>\" community, listen to Jennifer's podcast, and find her book, \"<a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product\/https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product\/habits-for-a-sacred-home-9-practices-from-history-to-anchor-and-restore-modern-families\">Habits for a Sacred Home<\/a>\" on our shop.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/?s=resurrection+eggs&amp;post_type=product\">Experience the Easter story with Resurrection Eggs<\/a> and explore more resources in our shop<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<hr \/>\n<ul>\n<li>Find resources from this podcast at <a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/radio-resources\/\">shop.familylife.com<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/past-radio-resources\/\">See resources from our past podcasts.<\/a><\/li>\n<li>Find more content and resources on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/app\/\">FamilyLife's app<\/a>!<\/li>\n<li>Help others find FamilyLife. Leave a review on <a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303\">Apple Podcast<\/a> or <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm?si=d6dfa8d2415f4750\">Spotify<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li>Check out all the FamilyLife's podcasts on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/familylife-podcast-network\/\">FamilyLife Podcast Network<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/fl2025-04-08.pdf","transcript_content":"<p><strong><em>FamilyLife Today<\/em><\/strong><strong><sup>\u00ae<\/sup><\/strong> <strong>with Dave and Ann Wilson - Web Version Transcript<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>This content has been generated by an artificial intelligence language model. While we strive for accuracy and quality, please note that the information provided will most likely not be entirely error-free or up-to-date. We recommend independently verifying the content with the originally-released audio. This transcript is provided for your personal use and general information purposes only. References to conferences, resources, or other special promotions may be obsolete. We do not assume any responsibility or liability for the use or interpretation of this content.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>How to Create a \u201cRule of Life\u201d for Your Home<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Guest:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Jennifer Pepito<\/p>\n<p>From the series:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Sacred Home (Day 2 of 3)<\/p>\n<p>Air date:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 April 8, 2025<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The face of God is always proximate\u2014He's always right there, smiling at me\u2014He likes me. I think that changed the trajectory of my parenting; because it is so easy\u2014and Christian parenting focused so much on behavior for so many years\u2014but God isn't up there always asking us to do something and kind of turning His back on us. He's not just giving us a list of projects; He's like with us.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, where we want to help you pursue the relationships that matter most. I'm Dave Wilson.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And I'm Ann Wilson. And you can find us at FamilyLifeToday.com. This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Alright. We started a conversation yesterday that I actually, Jennifer\u2014Jennifer Pepto is back with us\u2014I didn't see us going where we went yesterday.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 That wasn't planned, was it?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 We didn't get into the habits.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 No; it was great! We didn't get into the habits; but no, I thought sacred was going to be much cleaner. Even though I read your book\u2014and I know you don't say that\u2014<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u2014or unattainable, do you mean?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah, almost like something that's clean and tidy; and so I don't know what it is.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It's so perfect.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 The temple of God: there's no corruption at all. And you're like, \u201cNo, I'm just a regular mom, with chaos going on every minute.\u201d But sacred means set apart. Do you feel like that when you're doing it? It's like, \u201cThis is crazy.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 We're talking about <em>Habits for a Sacred Home<\/em>, her book.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I think that's the beauty of it\u2014is that Jesus was perfect; His temple, Jesus Himself was perfect\u2014so we don't have to be; but we also have the power of God in us to keep making those steps towards more peace in our homes and more connection through these habits.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 So you've got the nine habits from the rule of life. Help our listeners understand: \u201cWhat's a rule of life\u201d? We don't walk around every day going, \u201cWhat's your rule of life?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I think it's the same thing as a family vision, or a family mission statement, or your family essentials.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Do you have a family vision or mission statement?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, we do.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh, we got to get that.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Are you kidding me? When I wrote this book\u2014and funny enough, we<\/p>\n<p>wrote a family mission statement when my third-born, he's 26 now, was a baby; he might've been a year or so\u2014we wrote down: \u201cWhat are our family essentials?\u201d We loved being in nature; we were very interested in mission work; we loved being together. Our whole life, as a family, we really focused on those essentials that we wrote down 25 years ago. Maintained: we lived as missionaries; we paid off homes; we lived in the country so we could have nature. We said, \u201cNo,\u201d to a lot of other things like big toys, or a lot of weekend structured or scheduled activities, so that we could pursue those essentials.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But the rule of life did come later. We would've called it something different, like a vision or essentials, until I started reading about St. Benedict and his rule of life.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 When Dave and I were in seminary, we were taking classes in how to help counsel people\u2014he was going to be a pastor\u2014but it was good for us to get into some of our own junk. In that time, I remember our prof asked us: \u201cWhat were the family rules and habits in your home?\u201d\u2014which was just interesting for us to think through: habits. He said, \u201cEvery single family has those; they can be healthy or unhealthy.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ours was sports\u2014it was about that simple\u2014it paid for college and did a lot of things. There was no spiritual [habits] in the home I grew up in, and really not in yours as well. So as we became married; and then, parents, we\u2019re like, \u201cWe got to change a whole legacy\/a whole heritage to something.\u201d We had to come up with a family mission statement, and vision, and values.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>So rule of life: you've got nine habits. You want to start with number one, or how do you want to do it?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well, there are habits of work, habits of prayer; and in some ways, they are more values. And then, the habits that you do are sort of how you live those values out in your life.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well, one of ours was work.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh, yeah; that was one of the values that you had, raising your kids.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 We sort of took our name\u2014Wilson\u2014and the \u201cW\u201d: \u201cWhat's the \u2018W\u2019 going to be?\u201d We're like, \u201cWe want to teach our children: \u2018Work matters; work under God; work hard.\u2019\u201d They were roofers; they were cement guys. It was like, \u201cWe want hard work, so you know how to do it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 But that's a habit for you guys too.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah, for sure. I love that you mentioned that first; because it\u2019s one of my favorite habits: \u201cIf we're not willing to work, we're not even going to have a spiritual life; because that, in itself, takes work.\u201d You don't necessarily experience the joy of His presence the first time you open the Bible. You don't necessarily experience the joy of His presence the first time you sing or take a walk in nature.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But if you don't put in the work to regularly be with God\u2014whether that is talking to Him while you wash the dishes, or make the dinner, or change the diaper\u2014you have to put in the work of turning your affection to God. Especially now, it's so much easier to go on Instagram or to listen to a podcast. It's so much easier to always be having someone talk at us, or entertain us, and not really talk to God. So right there, there's a habit that helps develop our spiritual lives.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I love that you mentioned teaching your kids to work\u2014because so many of us\u2014our motivation is really: \u201cHow can I help my kids love God, and love us, and be responsible adults?\u201d A lot of us, we're not necessarily moved by even a sacred home\u2014we're just practical\u2014we just need to get our kids raised. Work is a big part of that: \u201cCan your kids pick up after themselves?\u201d In my Peaceful Press homeschool curriculum, we actually include practical life skills.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 That\u2019s so smart.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It's great because it develops the motor skills that kids need to be able to write an essay. But if a child can write beautiful essays\u2014which, actually, AI can do too\u2014but they don't know how to make a meal, or do the dishes, or organize their clothes, they're going to have a hard time in life. You can pay someone to do those things, but you can also pay someone to write an essay. Having a balance of skills for children, as they're growing, I think is so important. And it teaches them to value\u2014if you know how to work\u2014then you value the money it costs to buy what you need. If you know how to work, then you will put in the effort to develop your spiritual life.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 That's really good.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Did you give your kids an allowance?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Never; we never had a lot of money. By the time we did have a little bit more affluence, I was like, \u201cThey're too old; they can just work for it.\u201d I loved it when my kids got jobs early. My third child had a job working construction when he was like 14 years old. I'd have to drive him to the job sites, but it was a great experience. He's an awesome dad and husband, and bought his first home at 25, because he knew how to work.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well, it's interesting to me that you have added some great\u2014like Edith Schaeffer\u2014why did you happen to connect these great biblical teachers and influencers with each of your habits?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh, that was so much fun, Ann. I felt sad for so many moms, who don't know who these people are; those are the women who shaped me as a young mom. I was lucky to be in this community of really intelligent, loving moms, who were always reading. And so, as a young mom, I read Elisabeth Elliot, Edith Schaeffer, and Amy Carmichael. I was reading all those books. But so many of the young moms today don't know who those people are, and those are our heroes. I feel like, when we have heroes, then we can have a vision for what we could be like.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>During Covid even, when we were running out of supplies\u2014it was like: \u201cWhere's the toilet paper?\u201d \u201cWhere's the eggs?\u201d\u2014I would think to myself, \u201cWhat would Betsie ten Boom do?\u201d Because I'd read Corrie\u2014I was reading <em>The Hiding Place<\/em> out loud to my children\u2014and I knew that she wouldn't sit there, whining about it. She would've given things for what they had. Those women became my heroes and really helped me become the mom that I wanted to be. I feel like introducing those women to moms today would give them more of a vision. A lot of very dismal heroes today; we don't have a lot of people to look up to.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah. Why did you\u2014you've included recipes, like that's important\u2014you have prayers; you have action steps. Why all of that, and why include recipes in it?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I am probably, sometimes, more well-known for my Peaceful Press curriculum. What we do, as we're learning together, is we make a recipe. If we're reading about Edith Schaeffer in Switzerland, we make Swiss Zopf bead; or we read about Sabina Wurmbrand, or even Corrie ten Boom\u2014read about what happened to the Jews during the Holocaust\u2014we'd make challah. It was just a special part of learning together: baking together or cooking something together.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I feel like, when you're in the kitchen, you're breaking bread\u2014I think you can see that in Scripture too\u2014that Jesus, when He wanted to build community, and when He wanted to, in a sense, even show love to people, they would break bread together\u2014it wasn't just a lesson; it was a gathering, a celebration. I feel like cooking together or baking together with our kids; and then, enjoying something, makes it more of a celebration.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 That\u2019s really sweet.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You're like the Christian Martha Stewart.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ooh!<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You've got an entrepreneurial spirit; were you like that as a little girl?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Have you guys ever heard of that philosophy that what you played at, as a child, shapes what you're supposed to do as an adult? I did actually start little businesses, which is funny. I was an all-in mother\u2014I've been very careful to not over-travel or things like that\u2014but I do actually love business. So yes, I did play store; I had restaurants; I sewed doll clothes and sold them\u2014really, little side subject.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It's kind of great to watch your kids and see the things that they do love to play with.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah; absolutely. And to honor that, one of the things that my homeschool curriculum is based off is called the Charlotte Mason Method. One of her big sayings is: \u201cChildren are born persons.\u201d I think that's really important, also, for families as they're thinking about: \u201cWhat is our rule of life?\u201d What's important to us is to, also, take a little bit of time to get to know your children\/to observe your children:\u2014<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u201cWhat's important to them? What are they passionate about?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 we're all created in God's image. And so instead of trying to impose your image ideal on your children\u2014and this is where there is a little bit of Holy Spirit intuition\u2014because on the one hand, we have to have a vision for our family. But on the other hand, we have to recognize that our children are born persons and honor their unique calling and design.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>In our family, because we valued our rule of life, our essentials were: missions or time with God. But if we saw our children interested in something, we would try to find a class, or a tutor, or a mentor to help them develop those skills so that we could have that balance.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 So are they all completely different?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yes, so different.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Isn't it fun?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It is fun; it's amazing. I love\u2014it's like a painting or something\u2014there's so<\/p>\n<p>many different details and personalities.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Do you feel like\u2014a lot of them are adults now\u2014because of this value of work, do you feel like they're good workers?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah, they're actually all really good workers, really hard workers. The 16-year-old just got his second job working construction for somebody, and I love seeing how they enjoy working.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well, as you look at these habits\u2014and you have nine\u2014what one do you resonate with the most?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I'm guessing all of them.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well, for sure. Probably, the one that I resonate the most with is balance; and that's the last habit I talk about.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Wait, wait, wait, wait. You are one full-life schedule woman. Explain balance in your life, because you\u2019re doing everything.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah, I'm really careful actually. Are you about, I was telling you before the show started that I love the philosophy of the Monk Manual, where they have you set your goals based on being and doing. With my restoration home community, the first thing we do is have women write down two things:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u201cWhat do you want your children to remember about life in your home?\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>\u201cWhat kind of person do you want to be?\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>For me: I want to be present with my children; I want to be warm and loving; I want to be a good listener. So I pace myself with work; I don't grow as fast as maybe I could. I'm just turning to figure out what SEO means after ten years in an online business.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I think that, when you have a very clear vision of who you want to be, then it's easy to set goals that are sustainable. And the other thing\u2014once we have moms write down their vision or what they want their children to remember\u2014we actually have them start auditing their time. I think so many people don't get much done, because they're consuming way more than they're producing.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 So first, they're writing down their vision\u2014this is what you have all these women do\u2014and second\u2014<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 So then, we do a time audit. We actually spend a week, or even a month, just sort of tracking our time to see: \u201cOkay, I want my children to remember that, when they talk to me, I listened,\u201d \u201cI want my children to remember that I was a loving, responsive, warm mother.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But then\u2014if the way we live is like we organize all day; or we have them crying over their math; or we are constantly shuffling them around to different activities, where they don't even have any experience of us\u2014then we realize, \u201cOkay, my time audit says this...; my vision says this\u2026 How can I make them have more integrity? How can I make them align better?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>That's something I still do now: I'm constantly looking, like, \u201cOkay, here's how I'm spending my time.\u201d If I'm on my phone too much, I'm going to cut back; I have a phone-restriction thing, or I'll put my phone in a drawer for a day. I'm working, constantly adjusting my own life; because my vision is to be a safe space for my family. But sometimes, it's easy, if you go on Instagram, and you see what other people are doing or accomplishing, it's like, \u201cOh, I got to do more of that. I got to do more bread baking,\u201d \u201cI got to do more podcast recording,\u201d\u2014whatever you're looking at in the moment. It gets us off course of our vision.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But if we have the vision, and then we're tracking our time, you can make those two things align through a lot of other little habits that we talk about in the book.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Jennifer, I'm thinking of the working moms who feel so overwhelmed with their job. They're coming home, and they feel like they're exhausted; but they're giving their kids whatever they have left. They feel incredible guilt about that. Are they overwhelmed by just all the things we're saying?\u2014\u201cOkay, now I need to do this, and this, and this.\u201d How could we simplify it for that person?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ann, a homeschool mom can be just as guilty of checking out, and not connecting at all, because we can get into our own little schedule.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Really?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh, yeah; for sure. But in The Peaceful Press, we have this thing called \u201cThe Connection Challenge\u201d; and it's four simple steps; there's a free download. You look your children in the eyes for 20 seconds a day; you give them a 32<sup>nd<\/sup>-second hug; and then, if you can, spend 15 minutes reading aloud or playing outside together. Those four little things\u2014a working mom could do that\u2014just carve out a half hour of your time a day to connect with your kids.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But sometimes, also it's us taking a little authority over their time; because I think what happens more often is\u2014we maybe feel guilty, or we feel tired\u2014so we let them check out from us. Do you know what I mean? Because I think that's happening a lot more even I think moms probably want to check in with their kids, but they are lacking the authority or the confidence to make those efforts. There was a book called <em>Hold On to Your Kids<\/em> by Gordon Neufeld and Gabor Mat\u00e9. In that book, they talk a lot about how responsible adult behavior is the fruit of a connected family.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I have to get my pen out to write all this down.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You're going to write this down?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I totally am.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 We can go back and listen to the broadcast like other people.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I want it now, Dave. I want it now.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You\u2019re going to do\u2014even as you said, a 32<sup>nd<\/sup>-second hug\u2014<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It releases serotonin\u2014a 32<sup>nd<\/sup>-second hug releases serotonin\u2014helps regulate you and your child. You guys just talked about that with Ron and Nancy Deal,\u2014<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ron and Nan Deal, yes.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u2014that we're all trying to get regulated. And yet, just something as simple as a hug and some eye contact\u2014<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Look at you, listening to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>; way to go!<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It\u2019s great; what a great show.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 What a great rule of life! Everything you just said applies to, not just parenting, but marriage.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And it's not unattainable. I'm not asking people to live in a monastery and pray all day; it's just some simple things. Like even the nature aspect\u2014if you could just put your phone down and look at the sky for a few minutes a day with your kids\u2014that, in itself, would help regulate your body; help you connect with God; and give you some experience together that puts you in your relational circuits instead of in fight, flight, freeze.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And it's interesting too; because what we can do\u2014when we feel overwhelmed and stressed with our kids\u2014the easiest thing\u2014and I don't want you to feel guilty about me saying this, because we all do it\u2014is to put the TV on or to give our kids a device of some kind. But I'm telling you: this is good for you and your kids to just hug them and hold them; they might even fight it. What do you do with a teenager with that?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Oh, it was so sweet. We were walking in here, and my son was like\u2014he just put his hand on my shoulder\u2014and I was kind of like, \u201cDo you need something?\u201d\u2014because that used to be our interrupt rule; he'd put [his] hand [on my shoulder]. And he's like, \u201cNo, I was just praying for you. I feel like, if you start that, our teenagers want connection too.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 It's their habits. They will take that habit into their own family in marriage. They're going to touch you; they're going to pray for you; they're going to look you in the eye. If you are raising a son who looks his wife in the eye, and hugs her for 30 seconds a day, that's victory, people! That is victory.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And I'm telling you: every parent right now is doing what Ann's doing\u2014they're pausing\u2014they're like, \u201cI got to write this down.\u201d And let me just say to you: if you want parenting help, we would love to help you\u2014we have a site just for you\u2014FamilyLife.com\/ParentingHelp. It's free; we put together resources. But I know what you're doing right now\u2014we're all doing that\u2014this is really practical life-changing parenting help, right?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah; one of the things that helped me recognize how important connection was\u2014learning to attune with God\u2014as I started processing through some of my own fears. I was molested as a child. My mom was a very busy farm wife; and probably didn't know how to show love, because she hadn't received a lot of love. In my childhood, there were a lot of moments, where I felt very alone. As an adult, I started just asking, \u201cJesus, can You show me where You were in this moment? Can You come and comfort me in this moment?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I've done that same thing; I think it's super healthy.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And the interesting thing is: my friend\u2014Monk Manual founder\u2014said, \u201cThe face of God is always proximate. And when you say, \u2018Jesus, can You come and be with me?\u2019 His back is not to me.\u201d Maybe this is like me imagining; maybe it's just my imagination.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Well, God works in our imaginations.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And so, when I have an experience with Jesus, He's always right there, smiling at me; He likes me. I think that changed the trajectory of my parenting, because it is so easy\u2014and Christian parenting focused so much on behavior for so many years\u2014but God isn't up there always asking us to do something and kind of turning His back on us. He's not just giving us a list of projects; He's with us.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 He wants to be with us.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yes. I just read, I think in the Psalms, it says, \u201cThe Lord is pleased with His people.\u201d We are a joy to Him, and our children should be a joy to us. And if they're not, maybe it's because we aren't experiencing any joy with ourselves even, if we can't be with ourselves.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>The habits of prayer, of work\u2014they're partly the fruit of attunement with God\u2014and we talked about this earlier yesterday. It's also, the more we\u2014put in the habit of just being quiet with the Lord, or putting our phones down, or being in nature, or hugging our kids\u2014the more we do those little sort of relational connection things, or attunement things, then the more we're going to be able to attune with our children. It's like we attune with God; we attune with our children. The habits start to fall into place; a lot of life does become more peaceful.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I understand how intense it is\u2014we just had our whole family staying with us for Christmas\u2014we had a two-and-a-half-year old toddler; we had an infant in the house. One afternoon, I babysat both of the little grand-babies so the adults could go out. And it's intense; you can't do anything but hold or take care of. I, thankfully, had an older daughter around to help me.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But even just the more we're settled with God, the more we can actually enjoy that season; because it will be over\u2014that intense season of feeling like you can never get everything done, or you're always behind the eight ball\u2014pretty soon, that'll be over. No one's going to look at you like your infant looks at you. No one's going to look at you with those eyes of adoration like your infant will. No one's going to enjoy you\u2014like my little grand baby, the two-and-a-half-year old, patted me on the back the other day; we were saying goodbye\u2014she's like, \u201cGrammy, you're always so sweet to me.\u201d No one expresses themselves like a small child.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 They're free.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Jennifer:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 You can complain your way through that season; or you could settle into it a little bit, recognize that it's going to be short and just enjoy it. It will be over, and it would be nice to not look back and have a bunch of regrets.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Yeah. Here's what I'm thinking\u2014as a man, and as a husband, and a dad; and it's true for wives and moms\u2014of all the things that we do in our lives, what we've been talking about the last two days are the most important. It's our legacy; it's a godly legacy that God's called us to give to the next generation. It's more important than the job; it's more important than money; it's more important than the house. All the stuff\u2014that is important; that stuff's important: redoing my driveway, the roof, whatever; that matters\u2014but man, when I think of the things I think about so often, rather than pouring into my children to be men and women of God when they're adults, and raise men and women of God, that's all that matters.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And Dave, I would say this: we cannot do it apart from Jesus; He is the foundation. He is the One whom we find hope from, whom we find life from. As you said, Jennifer, He's always smiling at us. He loves us; He's cheering us on every day. And so, to go to Him\u2014and I know you're thinking, \u201cIt's too hard; I don't have time,\u201d\u2014but you can talk to Him all day long.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I don't know where you are in your relationship with Jesus, but can I just tell you that He loves you? You matter to Him more than you can even imagine. And so call out to Him for help\u2014He's always there\u2014He's always wanting to be with you to give you wisdom, discernment, energy, all the things you need. You might just need to pray that Jesus will help your kids sleep one night. It may not be every night, but one night; and He's there. He's with you. I think this is so good.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Dave:\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 And I know you're thinking, \u201cHow do I get this life?\u201d You read <em>Habits for a Sacred Home<\/em>; it gives you nine habits. You're not going to be able to do them all today or tomorrow, but you're going to learn how to live like Jennifer's saying you guys live.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a donor-supported production of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry.<\/p>\n<p>Helping you pursue the relationships that matter most.<\/p>\n<p><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019ve benefited from the <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs of producing them and making them available online?<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>Copyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2025 FamilyLife. 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