{"id":312919,"date":"2025-02-27T07:34:11","date_gmt":"2025-02-27T12:34:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/building-a-legacy-of-love-through-intentional-fatherhood-jerrad-lopes-bobby-markham\/"},"modified":"2025-06-16T09:25:02","modified_gmt":"2025-06-16T13:25:02","slug":"building-a-legacy-of-love-through-intentional-fatherhood-jerrad-lopes-bobby-markham","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/building-a-legacy-of-love-through-intentional-fatherhood-jerrad-lopes-bobby-markham\/","title":{"rendered":"Building a Legacy of Love Through Intentional Fatherhood: Jerrad Lopes &#038; Bobby Markham"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Simple yet meaningful activities can quickly turn fatherhood from a struggle to an overnight success. Jerrad Lopes and Bobby Markham give practical advice for parents seeking to reconnect with their children through repentance, presence, and consistent effort.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Hungering for peace from God\u2014with no idea how to get there? Scholar and author Jeremiah Johnston points the way to uncovering shalom in every area of life.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":47000,"featured_media":312921,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"audio","audio_file":"https:\/\/traffic.omny.fm\/d\/clips\/cbd16f10-ac60-4f09-b4df-b15400ce35aa\/33aaac7e-3581-4e21-a3df-b154011ba58c\/35e81dcf-4846-4172-b150-b282013e3fff\/audio.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:25:17","filesize":"23.18M","filesize_raw":"","date_recorded":"2025-02-27 07:34:11","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2837],"tags":[],"podcast_series":[8571],"cwp_profile":[10957,9579],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-312919","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-fathers","podcast_series-jeremiah-johnston-unleashing-peace","cwp_profile-bobby-markham","cwp_profile-jerrad-lopes","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2025\/02\/image_30934b.jpg?w=1024","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/312919\/building-a-legacy-of-love-through-intentional-fatherhood-jerrad-lopes-bobby-markham","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/312919\/building-a-legacy-of-love-through-intentional-fatherhood-jerrad-lopes-bobby-markham","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"5dfaUkyeok\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/building-a-legacy-of-love-through-intentional-fatherhood-jerrad-lopes-bobby-markham\/\">Building a Legacy of Love Through Intentional Fatherhood: Jerrad Lopes &#038; Bobby Markham<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/building-a-legacy-of-love-through-intentional-fatherhood-jerrad-lopes-bobby-markham\/embed\/#?secret=5dfaUkyeok\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Building a Legacy of Love Through Intentional Fatherhood: Jerrad Lopes &#038; Bobby Markham&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"5dfaUkyeok\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2025\/02\/image_30934b.jpg",1024,1024,true]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"Margaret","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/margaret-coylefamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"Hungering for peace from God\u2014with no idea how to get there? Scholar and author Jeremiah Johnston points the way to uncovering shalom in every area of life.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"<div style=\"text-align: center\"><iframe src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/xPKogzpx3QM?si=4wkQoHCf8WRlkylA\" width=\"560\" height=\"315\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/div>\n<ul>\n<li>Learn more about Jerrad Lopes at <a href=\"https:\/\/www.dadtired.com\/\">dadtired.com<\/a> or follow him on Instagram @JaredLopes<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/donate.familylife.com\/february-2025\/my-daddys-hero\/?cru_source=D0002408AT&amp;cru_medium=podcast&amp;cru_campaign=February2025\">We'll send his book \"Did You Know My Daddy is a Superhero?\"<\/a> at no cost to you with a donation of any size this week, as our way of saying a huge \"Thank you!\" for partnering with us.<\/li>\n<li>Find resources from this podcast at <a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/radio-resources\/\">shop.familylife.com<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/past-radio-resources\/\">See resources from our past podcasts.<\/a><\/li>\n<li>Find more content and resources on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/app\/\">FamilyLife's app<\/a>!<\/li>\n<li>Help others find FamilyLife. Leave a review on <a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303\">Apple Podcast<\/a> or <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm?si=d6dfa8d2415f4750\">Spotify<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li>Check out all the FamilyLife's podcasts on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/flministries\/familylife-podcast-network\/\">FamilyLife Podcast Network<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/fl2025-02-27.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>FamilyLife Today\u00ae with Dave and Ann Wilson - Web Version Transcript<\/p>\n<p>This content has been generated by an artificial intelligence language model. While we strive for accuracy and quality, please note that the information provided will most likely not be entirely error-free or up-to-date. We recommend independently verifying the content with the originally-released audio. This transcript is provided for your personal use and general information purposes only. References to conferences, resources, or other special promotions may be obsolete. We do not assume any responsibility or liability for the use or interpretation of this content.<\/p>\n<p>Building a Legacy of Love Through Intentional Fatherhood<\/p>\n<p>Guests:Jerrad Lopes, Bobby Markham<\/p>\n<p>From the series:How to Become a Great Dad (Day 2 of 3)<\/p>\n<p>Air date:February 27, 2025<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:I honestly go in with no agenda. We just go on a walk and sometimes I've even kind of made it a fun little game in my head where I will just start walking and I won't be the first to talk. So I'll just start walking and just in silence and then just without fail every time all four of my kids will just start on some monologue, whether it's about their day or their friends, each of them on their own just loves having one-on-one time with Daddy where they can talk about whatever they want.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:Welcome to FamilyLife Today, where we want to help you pursue the relationships that matter most. I'm Ann Wilson.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:And I'm Dave Wilson. And you can find us at FamilyLifeToday.com. This is FamilyLife Today.<\/p>\n<p>Okay, we've got a couple guys in the studio today. It's going to be pretty cool.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:Do you like it when you have a couple men in here with you?<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Well, who cares what I think? What do you think?<\/p>\n<p>Ann:I like it.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:You're the only woman. I'm usually the only guy.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:I always like being around guys too.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:You're a boy mom. And so anyway, we've got Jerrad Lopes back with us, Dad Tired. We had Jerrad here on a previous episode, but we've got Bobby Markham in the studio. Bobby works here at FamilyLife. In fact, Jerrad, Bobby was probably your connection as you got to the building.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Oh yeah, he drove me over here.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Yeah. Bobby, tell our listeners what you do.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:Bobby is one of the best dads that I've ever met in my life.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Thank you, Ann. That's very gracious.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:That is a high compliment.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:That is a very high compliment.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:We've got two great dads sitting here.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:Yeah.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Oh man.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Two out of three ain't bad.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:What are you talking about? You're amazing.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Yeah, so tell our listeners what you do at FamilyLife.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:And about your family too.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Okay, I've been married for 25 years to Rebecca.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:And you can catch a little accent.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Yeah.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Where's the accent from?<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:That's Arkansas for you.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Okay, alright.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Yes, country accent from Arkansas. We're missionaries and we get to serve on this incredible team vetting guests for this show and doing a lot of other cool stuff, but I love interacting with guys like Jerrad.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Nobody would ever guess that you've got a hip-hop rap background.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Oh, let's not bring that up.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Jerrad\u2019s like\u2014<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:I feel like that\u2019s the only thing we should bring up.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:See, right Jerrad?<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Oh no, let's not even go there Dave.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:Could you dance?<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Can you just give us a sneak peek? What do you mean?<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Oh, please don't. Please don't.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Like you personally; you are the hip hop\u2026<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:That was buried with Jesus Christ.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:That's incredible.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Yeah, so I have five kids.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:He's changing the subject.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:And all growing up, they would always ask me, what was your name? What was your hip hop name? And I would never tell them. I was like, \u201cNo, that's gone.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave:You\u2019re not going to tell us.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:\u201cI\u2019m not bringing that up. It'll never go away.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:I want to check it out right now.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:It will never go away.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Hey, it's buried. It's dead. We're not going to\u2026<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:It's not buried in my mind. I'm going to tell you that as soon as we're done recording, I'm going to get it out of him.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Yeah, we got to do it. You got a daughter getting married?<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Yes. Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:Your oldest daughter's getting married.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:My oldest daughter. We have five children, years 20 to 10, two girls and three boys, and our oldest daughter is getting married. It's a big time.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Yeah, we brought you in. Jerrad's going to talk about a video that went viral, but it's bigger than the video. It's really a great dad concept of how to be a dad.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:Bobby, you've always been super intentional with your kids, and you've spent time very specifically with each of them. Share a little bit about that. I think it's really pretty cool.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:I would say it's been about ten or twelve years ago when our kids were, my oldest daughter was six to eight years old. We started what we initially just would call special times. We didn't really know what to call it, but every Friday night to keep from losing connection with different kids. When you have a family of five kids, it's easy to not realize what's going on in somebody's life.<\/p>\n<p>Every Friday night we will take a time where one of the kids will be with me and we will stay up late. We'll find a game, whether it's a board game, card game, video game to play. We'll have a late-night snack, and other people might have to go to bed by this time so it's kind of a special night with them. And then we might stay up till midnight or after. And so we'll separate in the house and have our own individual time.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Is this something they really look forward to?<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Yes, and it's amazing that even when our girls were 18, they would get excited that it was special time night, and they would look forward to that. And that's always been such a gift, something that we've been able to treasure; that they weren't looking forward to getting away from us, but to have that time.<\/p>\n<p>One of the special things that my wife really started initiating in that was being intentional to ask them during that time, \u201cHow can I be praying for you?\u201d Just to have a moment to ask that question and you never know what's going to come into that conversation and then stop and pray, pray with them, and then you just move on, and you got your candy and popcorn and whatever you're doing. But it's just being intentional, and it's built a really lasting impact in our relationship with our kids.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:I bet you feel like you know each of them.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Yes, there's always surprises. We're not a perfect family either, and we have hiccups and struggles and things like that, but this really keeps us grounded together. My dad who also lives with us, he always jokes, \u201cWhose special time is it tonight?\u201d because every night in this household is a special time. Because this is turned into not just ours with our children, but our daughters have a night that they do together. Our sons have a night that they do together.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:That's so sweet.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:And then my dad has a night now that he rotates through the kids and so it's built over the years.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:I want to be part of your family, man.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:I was just thinking \u201cCan I come over this weekend?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann:I know. I told you he's a good dad.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Dave and Ann\u2019s special night. What's really funny is I get to look at you and there's Rebecca, she's filming you through the window. We do have five cameras capturing this whole thing.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:She knows.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:But that's the uniqueness of family, I think, because we're all different but we have a\u2014I mean that's a beautiful\u2026 I mean the thing is people can hear that and think We can do that.\u201d And they're going to hear what Jerrad did and they can do the same thing. It's like it's transferable; it's spending time.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:Jerrad, do you have any thoughts about that?<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Well, first you said your daughter's about to get married, right?<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:It just is making me teary eyed thinking about that. I have three daughters, but I'm just imagining my three-year-old, five-year-old when they're little baby girls and how excited they would be to hear about a special night of sleepover and then actually recently my daughter had this little dress, this was this last week and she said, daddy, can you zip this up for me? And she put her head down and I'm going to get teary eyed just thinking about this dumb story. But she whipped her hair over so I could zip up the back of her dress and I just had this flash of her wedding and I'm like, \u201cI can't do this. I'm going to absolutely bawl.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave:She's three years old.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Yeah.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Wow.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:I've got goosebumps as you're talking about that because we've had that same experience. This is pretty emotional, but I'll share with this with you real quick. A week and a half ago, my daughter, I get a text from her \u201cDaddy\u201d exclamation mark. I'm like, \u201cYes.\u201d And she's like, \u201cWe forgot something.\u201d Like \u201cWhat?\u201d She said, \u201cWe need to practice our daddy daughter dance.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Oh dude, don't do it.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:I'm already crying.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:I was like, \u201cYou're right, and I probably need to stop talking.\u201d I told her \u201cI'm already getting emotional, just texting.\u201d She said, \u201cMe too.\u201d Our Friday night came around for our final special time of her living with us and we were both exhausted that day. And so we both agreed to punt it to the next day. The next day came, and it was a wedding shower and exhausted the end of the day and said, \u201cLet's punt it till after church on Sunday.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>And so Sunday comes and we didn't punt it this time. We have a song that started when she was eight years old. I got a book called Dance Me, Daddy, and it's a book about a dad who would dance his little daughters on his tiptoes and the story progresses through the teen years up until she gets married. And now she comes home, and he's got gray hair and before she leaves the visit, she always has one last dance.<\/p>\n<p>The book came with a CD with a song called \u201cKing of the World.\u201d We would put it on and do that dance when she was eight years old, and Abigail was six years old. We would do that all the time and them giggling and us just twirling and being silly and all that and they would always say, \u201cWe're going to do that when we get married,\u201d and you don't know that that's going to come to fruition all these years later, but it came up and this is what she wanted to do.<\/p>\n<p>And so we get into the room, and I bring out the Bluetooth speaker and as I start the song and the second the words kicked in the song, we both just became a mess. She laid her head on my shoulder, I laid my head on her shoulder, and we went in a circle and cried the entire song. As the song was ending, I backed up and I was like, \u201cI think we needed the cry more than we needed the dance.\u201d And she said, \u201cIt won't be the last time.\u201d And then she proceeded to honor me, and I want to share just a second.<\/p>\n<p>I won't say the whole thing here, but this is the gist of what she was saying. \u201cThank you for everything you did for me growing up. You really set the example for the kind of guy for me to look for and now I found him and he's the man that you and mama have prayed for since before I was born. Even though I'll be moving out, this isn't the end of anything. I can't wait to see the memories that we will continue to create in the future.\u201d And I'm telling you, I don't even know if the actual daddy daughter dance in the wedding is going to top that moment for me because it was just the two of us.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:It\u2019s so personal.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:It's so private and I had no anticipation that she would speak to me like that.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Well thanks Bobby.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Yeah, thanks Bobby.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Holy cow dude; that is so beautiful.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:Bobby, that is like incredible.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:What a gift, man, that God would give you. We don't always get to see the fruit of the things that, the seeds that we're trying to plant and the fact that God would give you just His grace and His goodness to say, \u201cLet me give you just to let you see some of the fruit of all those seeds you've been planting all these years.\u201d Good job, man.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Thank you. I saw the video you guys are going to be talking about in the little viral moment that you've had. It immediately brought all of this flooding in, and Jerrad is walking the same path that we've been walking for all these years, and he's headed towards some sweet things.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:No, I don't want to get there. I just want my babies to stay three and five.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Yeah, well, that's not going to happen.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:I'm guessing most people don't know, but you've been discipling her fianc\u00e9.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Yeah, we've been spending time together and he came to me when he first approached my daughter. She was like, \u201cWell, you have to talk to my dad.\u201d It was just a really special moment because I didn't know him very well. I'd seen him at church a lot, but I didn't know him well, but I told him that the fact that I didn't know him didn't put him behind the curve because I love and trust my daughter's judgment so much that I think you're the right guy.<\/p>\n<p>We talked that first day and I shared my testimony and asked him to share his. He was a smart man because he hired my daughter to be his piano teacher. She teaches piano and he wanted to get near her and I remember seeing him one time pull out a melted chocolate truffle from his pocket to give her because he found out that was her favorite candy. And so at the end of our time together, I wanted to bless him because he was about to go in and have his first private sit down with my daughter and I had for him a whole bag of chocolate truffles to take into her as a gift from him.<\/p>\n<p>She gave me a hug and I walked past and then he came up and handed them to her. She was so excited that he had those for her, and he didn't say they were from me. He gave them to her, and she gives him a hug and he's looking over her shoulder and I'm standing behind him with my two thumbs up. Like right on; good job man. And just wanting to set him up for success because I could tell that he was the kind of man that she needed and she just based off of her judgment, she's a good and godly girl, so.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:I told you he was a good dad.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:I need to spend more time with Bobby.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:I know, we all do. We should have Bobby time. Bobby, I'll say this too, as a grown woman, there is not a woman on the planet who doesn't long for that with her dad. I want to ask all you guys, maybe a dad's feeling like it's too late, \u201cMy daughter is already married,\u201d or \u201cShe's a teenager now it will be awkward.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Or \u201cWe don't have a good relationship.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann:As she's gotten older, now it feels awkward. What would you say to those dads? and not just, I'm thinking of all of you.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Yeah, I would say just laying a foundation of being quick to repent. I've always told people that one of the key things in my relationships with my kid because I mess up all the time, is to be able to ask for forgiveness. And I think that's always a great place to start and to initiate and be able to express what it is that you desire and that you do desire to be there but you haven't been there maybe, and please forgive me or please forgive me for this very thing, whatever that is, and just laying that groundwork to get there and I think that's a great place to start.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:What do you think, Jerrad?<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:I was going to say, what do you think Ann? Because it seems like from a woman's perspective, what would you long for if you were in that situation, what would you long for?<\/p>\n<p>Ann:I think that. I think every little girl and woman longs for her dad to see her, to notice her, to appreciate her, to compliment her, and my dad was really absent when I was little, but I mean he was in his nineties. I feel like he loved me best as he got older, but he also apologized. He's like, \u201cI wasn't there for you when you were little, and I regret that.\u201d Man, I just cried when he said that. I thought, \u201cHere I am. I'm a grown woman.\u201d I know all of that, and yet there's something very healing like a balm that we all long for our dad's approval and for him to say, \u201cI know maybe it's felt weird,\u201d or \u201cI've been distant, but I want to know you.\u201d Oh, every girl would melt before her dad.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Yeah, for sure. Let me just stop for a second and say, if you're a parent and you're resonating with this, we know it's really, really hard.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:So we've pulled together some of our most helpful parenting pieces into one spot for you.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Go to FamilyLife.com\/ParentingHelp. Did you write that down or are you typing it in right now? Here it is again, FamilyLife.com\/ParentingHelp. So go there now.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad, tell us about this Ring doorbell video.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:I started doing Daddy walks with my daughters and my son. Mainly my son was, he had just turned 13 and I felt like I was just losing touch with, as he entered into those early teen years. I'm like, \u201cMan, I need\u201d\u2014I couldn't find the thing that was allowing us to connect and so I'm like, \u201cI'm just going to take him on walks.\u201d It was like 15 minutes basically around the block, easy stuff.<\/p>\n<p>So I started doing that with each kid. They all have their night of the week that they get to go on a daddy walk. I took my three-year-old, they go in order of age, so it's my oldest to the youngest is how the week progresses. I took my three-year-old on a walk and she's just talking her little heart out and we got done and as we were walking back in the house, she said, \u201cHug, Daddy.\u201d And so I went and gave her a hug and then she gave me this big kiss as we were walking in.<\/p>\n<p>I just pulled up the Ring footage to show my wife look at this little moment that she did as we were walking back in the house and then I thought the ring is capturing this every time we go on these walks as we're coming back in. So I just compiled all of that into one little video. I mean there's like 50 million views or so. It just went berserk. We've never done anything that, but views aside, who cares about that? My kids don't know anything about the views or care about social media at all, but to this day, every day they say, daddy, is it my turn again? Is it my turn for the walk? I've had a lot of people since that video went so viral asking, what do you say?<\/p>\n<p>What questions do you ask? I honestly go in with no agenda. We just go on a walk and sometimes I've even kind of made it a fun little game in my head where I will just start walking and I won't be the first to talk. So I'll just start walking and just in silence and then just without fail every time all four of my kids will just start on some monologue, whether it's about their day or their friends, or the bugs that they want to see or talk about, but each of them on their own just loves having one-on-one time with Daddy where they can talk about whatever they want.<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:It's beautiful.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:How did you approach it for the first time, Jerrad? How did you ask them?<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:I literally just said, \u201cLet's go on a walk.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann:And they wanted to.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Yeah, all of them wanted to. My 13-year-old boy was the only one who kind of like, \u201cOh Dad, I want to do this game,\u201d or \u201cI want to go play with my friends.\u201d But the girls especially, they are begging for it. I also did a thing where they each think that they're the only ones who get a lollipop, so I bought a huge bag of lollipop suckers, and they think that they're the only one that gets it. They think it's their secret. They don't know that each of them gets that on each walk.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:So they eat it on the walk.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:So as we go on a walk, I pull out the sucker. They get to have the sucker as we walk. But yeah, the girls especially love it, but it's been, again, I'm trying to navigate teenage years, which is, I just stepped into it and it's difficult and pray for me. I'm going to pick your brain on all the\u2026<\/p>\n<p>Ann:What kind of conversations happen? What kind of topics come up?<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:We're in a weird season because I'm having puberty talks, and I have a three-year-old. Sometimes I make the joke that I'm having very deep talks about very deep things and at the same time I'm getting yelled at. There was one point where I'm getting yelled at, so \u201cChange my diaper\u201d for my 2-year-old when she was two. So it's a weird time to be a parent in my house, but everything comes up, a lot of stuff about friends. \u201cMy friends are saying this\u201d or \u201cWhat should I do when my friends do this kind of thing?\u201d or \u201cI feel picked on.\u201d I mean just everything comes up. It's become the highlight of my week, and theirs, for sure.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Are either of you guys familiar with a song that came out in my generation by a guy named Harry Chapin called \u201cCat\u2019s in the Cradle?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Bobby:Yes.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:Oh yeah, you've heard this song.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Jerrad, have you ever heard this song?<\/p>\n<p>Ann:I bet you've heard of it, Jerrad.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:I don\u2019t know.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:I'll read you a lyric or two. I mean it's five verses. I could sing it. I've done it many times with my guitar. I won't do that. It captures what you guys, and by the way, they've redone it like heavy metal. I mean it's an acoustic singer songwriter guy, but yeah, here's the first verse.<\/p>\n<p>My child arrived just the other day<\/p>\n<p>He came to the world in the usual way<\/p>\n<p>But there were planes to catch and bills to pay<\/p>\n<p>He learned to walk while I was away<\/p>\n<p>And he was talkin\u2019 \u2018fore I knew it, and as he grew<\/p>\n<p>He\u2019d say, \u201cI'm gonna be like you, Dad\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou know I'm gonna be like you\u201d<\/p>\n<p>The chorus is<\/p>\n<p>And the cat\u2019s in the cradle and the silver spoon<\/p>\n<p>Little boy blue and the man on the moon<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhen you comin\u2019 at home, Dad?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI don't know when, but we'll get together then<\/p>\n<p>You know we'll have a good time then\u201d<\/p>\n<p>It goes through sort of like \u201cCinderella\u201d by Steven Curtis Chapman sort of goes through the different days.<\/p>\n<p>My son turned ten just the other day<\/p>\n<p>He said, \u201cThanks for the ball, Dad, come on let's play<\/p>\n<p>Can you teach me to throw?\u201d I said, \u201cNot today<\/p>\n<p>I got a lot to do.\u201d He said, \u201cThat's okay\u201d<\/p>\n<p>And he walked away but his smile never dimmed<\/p>\n<p>It said, \u201cI'm gonna be like him, yeah<\/p>\n<p>You know I'm gonna be like him\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Well, he came from college just the other day<\/p>\n<p>So much like a man I just had to say<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSon, I'm proud of you, can you sit for a while?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>He shook his head and he said with a smile<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat I'd really like, Dad, is to borrow the car keys<\/p>\n<p>See you later, can I have them please?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Listen to this last verse.<\/p>\n<p>I've long since retired, my son's moved away<\/p>\n<p>I called him up just the other day<\/p>\n<p>I said, \u201cI'd like to see you if you don't mind\u201d<\/p>\n<p>He said, \u201cI'd love to, Dad, if I could find the time<\/p>\n<p>You see my new job's a hassle and the kids have the flu<\/p>\n<p>But it's sure nice talking to you, Dad<\/p>\n<p>It's been sure nice talking to you\u201d<\/p>\n<p>And as I hung up the phone it occurred to me<\/p>\n<p>He'd grown up just like me<\/p>\n<p>My boy was just like me<\/p>\n<p>I mean, it was one of these classic songs where the reason I thought of it\u2014I mean I literally had to go pull up the lyrics\u2014is you guys are the opposite of that. You're doing what every dad listening to and every mom listening to is hoping her man will do. You're intentional. That is the word, I think, intentional. Our days and our weeks and our jobs and our lives are really full, and we don't have time to take a walk or to do a dance and you guys are doing it. And that's what matters.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Well, I appreciate you saying that. I don't feel like I'm doing well, but\u2026<\/p>\n<p>Dave:You never do.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Yeah, I wanted to find something that was sustainable. I always loved the idea of doing a date, like a daddy date, but it always felt like, well, we got to pack up the car and drive to\u2014where are we going to go? Restaurant or a coffee shop or the park. But the walk just felt like \u201cI can go on a walk.\u201d It's hard to make excuses for a 15-minute walk around the block.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:There's something too about, especially with guys, I know there's something about shoulder to shoulder looking forward that doesn't feel intimidating, especially with teenagers. I realize that with boys, hanging out with boys seemed less intimidating to them. What is that, do you think?<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:I think everyone feels awkward. I've done the coffee dates. I started that with my little girls, and we would sit there, and I didn't know what questions to ask, or she would talk about nothing deep, and I felt like, \u201cWas this a waste of time?\u201d We talked about some cartoon or whatever. So I think you're right. We've had much deeper conversations when it just feels organic and... I'm not even asking. Usually it's just me asking follow-up questions to what they're already saying.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Or even in the car.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Yeah.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:That shoulder to shoulder. You're both looking that way. You're not looking this way. There's something, at least for men, I think about this.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:I can't remember who it was. I think it was donut dates. The dad always pulled out a notebook on their dates and then he'd write down what she said. She said, I was probably five, I don't even know when it started, and she said, because she was in the interview, I was like, he's writing down what I'm saying. I must be so special. I thought that was genius, like a genius move and he would just write it down.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Am I remembering this right? When she got married, he gave her the book.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:I think he did.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Of all these years of just little things she said when she's five and fifteen and now. It's pretty cool.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Wow.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:You get emotional, which makes me emotional. I can't look at you when I say it. Why do you get emotional about even reading the Cat\u2019s and the Cradle?<\/p>\n<p>Dave:I think it's why your video went viral. I think dads see it, and I'm sure women did too, but you see it and you're like, \u201cThat's what I'm made for,\u201d and it's doable. Some videos you see is like, \u201cI'm not like that guy. I'm not gifted. I could never create a date like that,\u201d but I could go on a walk, and I'm supposed to, and that's my call. And I think that's what it is. It's powerful. And I know as a grandfather, it's a legacy.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:But you never had it. That's what I think. I get teary thinking you never had that. You never had; one time did you have that. Probably you too, Jerrad.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Yeah, I didn't have it either.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:It's cool that you can change a legacy. A bad legacy was given to you, but you, we get the chance to go, \u201cI'm going to change the Wilson legacy,\u201d the Lopes legacy.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:By God's grace.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:And you're doing it.<\/p>\n<p>Jerrad:Yeah. By God's grace.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:I'm thinking there's dads listening going, \u201cOkay, I'm going to go on a walk,\u201d or \u201cI'm going to grab my teenage daughter and we're going to dance tonight,\u201d or \u201cWe're going to have a special time.\u201d Jerrad, you've written a book on this, Dad Tired. It\u2019s got a lot of ideas like this that you've heard today. I know if you\u2019re a dad like me, at least, I don't know if women do this, but we're like, \u201cJust tell me what to do. Just tell me what to do.\u201d And you know what, we did today. We really told you what to do.<\/p>\n<p>So get Dad Tired and go on Amazon and get the book or go to our show notes at FamilyLifeToday.com, and there's a link there for Dad Tired, but also, we have Jerrad's children's book, My Daddy's Hero that we'll send you if you send us a donation to FamilyLife. You send us a donation; this is how we function. You give and we are able to do what we do, and we're going to send you a gift for giving us a gift. You can go to FamilyLifeToday.com or give us a call at 1-800-<\/p>\n<p>Ann:\u201cF,\u201d as in Family, \u201cL,\u201d as in Life, la family. [Laughter]<\/p>\n<p>Dave:That's \u201cF,\u201d as in Family, \u201cL,\u201d as in Life, and the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Ann:Oh yeah, that's it.<\/p>\n<p>Dave:Or if you're a numbers guy like me, it's 1-800-358-6329. I hope they keep this one because you can be polished and edited, or you could be real.<\/p>\n<p>Ann:What's the name of our program?<\/p>\n<p>Dave:FamilyLife Today is a donor-supported production of FamilyLife\u00ae, a Cru\u00ae Ministry. Helping you pursue the relationships that matter most.<\/p>\n<p>If you\u2019ve benefited from the FamilyLife Today transcripts, would you consider donating today to help defray the costs of producing them and making them available online?<\/p>\n<p>Copyright \u00a9 2025 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.<\/p>\n<p>www.FamilyLife.com<\/p>\n","theme_header_position":"Sticky","post_header_is_sticky":"default","is_header_overlay":"0"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/312919","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/47000"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=312919"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/312921"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=312919"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=312919"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=312919"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=312919"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=312919"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=312919"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}