{"id":308507,"date":"2024-05-16T09:00:00","date_gmt":"2024-05-16T13:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/healing-from-sexual-abuse-my-story-mary-demuth-2\/"},"modified":"2024-11-19T04:15:11","modified_gmt":"2024-11-19T09:15:11","slug":"healing-from-sexual-abuse-my-story-mary-demuth-2","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/healing-from-sexual-abuse-my-story-mary-demuth-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Healing from Sexual Abuse: My Story: Mary Demuth"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Are you suffering the effects of abuse? Mary DeMuth has lived it. She opens up about her own past sexual abuse and her path to healing. From shame to joy, her journey shows lasting peace is possible after trauma.<\/p>\n<p>\u00a0<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Dealing with the aftermath of sexual abuse? Mary DeMuth shares her story from shame to joy, proving lasting peace after trauma is possible.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":47000,"featured_media":280865,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"audio","audio_file":"https:\/\/traffic.omny.fm\/d\/clips\/cbd16f10-ac60-4f09-b4df-b15400ce35aa\/33aaac7e-3581-4e21-a3df-b154011ba58c\/968f683e-f4da-475c-8d05-b16a014d61c1\/audio.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:28:02","filesize":"25.71M","filesize_raw":"","date_recorded":"2024-05-16 09:00:00","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"podcast_series":[],"cwp_profile":[9065],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-308507","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","cwp_profile-mary-demuth","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/06\/image-scaled.jpg?w=1024","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/308507\/healing-from-sexual-abuse-my-story-mary-demuth-2","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/308507\/healing-from-sexual-abuse-my-story-mary-demuth-2","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"8sWDoznZEd\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/healing-from-sexual-abuse-my-story-mary-demuth-2\/\">Healing from Sexual Abuse: My Story: Mary Demuth<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/healing-from-sexual-abuse-my-story-mary-demuth-2\/embed\/#?secret=8sWDoznZEd\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Healing from Sexual Abuse: My Story: Mary Demuth&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"8sWDoznZEd\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"secondline_imported_guid":["968f683e-f4da-475c-8d05-b16a014d61c1"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/traffic.omny.fm\/d\/clips\/cbd16f10-ac60-4f09-b4df-b15400ce35aa\/33aaac7e-3581-4e21-a3df-b154011ba58c\/968f683e-f4da-475c-8d05-b16a014d61c1\/audio.mp3"],"duration":["00:28:02"],"filesize":["25.71M"],"show_notes":["\n<p>Learn more about Mary:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Connect with Mary Demuth and catch more of their thoughts at <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marydemuth.com\/\">marydemuth.com<\/a>, and on <a href=\"http:\/\/instagram.com\/marydemuth\">Instagram,<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/AuthorMaryDeMuth\/\">Facebook<\/a> and <a href=\"http:\/\/twitter.com\/marydemuth\">X<\/a> @marydemuth<\/li>\n<li>And grab Mary Demuth\u2019s book, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marydemuth.com\/books\/not-marked-finding-hope-healing-sexual-abuse\/\">Not Marked: Finding Hope and Healing After Sexual Abuse<\/a> on her site.<\/li>\n<li>Intrigued by today\u2019s episode? Think deeper about Overcoming Abuse by listening to <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/how-god-turned-my-mess-into-his-message-noe-garcia\/\">How God Turned my Mess into His Message<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li>Want to <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/guest\/mary-demuth\/\">hear more episodes by Mary DeMuth, listen here<\/a>!\u00a0<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<hr>\n<p>FamilyLife Links:\u00a0<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/donate.familylife.com\/may-2024\/?cru_source=D0002405RB&cru_medium=RadioBanner&cru_premium=PRE21802&cru_campaign=May2024&utm_source=web&utm_medium=radiobanner&utm_campaign=may2024\">Double your gift this month<\/a> when you give to FamilyLife!<\/li>\n<li>Find resources from this podcast at <a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/radio-resources\/\">shop.familylife.com<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/past-radio-resources\/\">See resources from our past podcasts.<\/a><\/li>\n<li>Find more content and resources on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/app\/\">FamilyLife's app<\/a>!<\/li>\n<li>Help others find FamilyLife. Leave a review on <a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303\">Apple Podcast<\/a> or <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm?si=d6dfa8d2415f4750\">Spotify<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li>Check out all the FamilyLife's podcasts on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/familylife-podcast-network\/\">FamilyLife Podcast Network<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n"],"_edit_lock":["1729040805:47000"],"_thumbnail_id":["280865"],"_edit_last":["47000"],"theme_header_position":["Sticky"],"post_header_is_sticky":["default"],"is_header_overlay":["0"],"episode_type":["audio"],"date_recorded":["2024-05-16 09:00:00"],"enclosure":["https:\/\/traffic.omny.fm\/d\/clips\/cbd16f10-ac60-4f09-b4df-b15400ce35aa\/33aaac7e-3581-4e21-a3df-b154011ba58c\/968f683e-f4da-475c-8d05-b16a014d61c1\/audio.mp3"],"_seopress_redirections_type":["301"],"_seopress_redirections_logged_status":["both"],"_seopress_analysis_target_kw":[""],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/fl2024-05-16.pdf"],"transcript_content":["\nFamilyLife Today\u00ae National Radio Version (time edited) Transcript\r\n\r\nReferences to conferences, resources, or other special promotions may be obsolete.\r\n\r\nHealing from Sexual Abuse: My Story\r\n\r\nGuest:Mary DeMuth\r\n\r\nFrom the series:Healing from Sexual Abuse: My Story (Day 1 of 2)\r\n\r\nAir date:May 16, 2024\r\n\r\nShelby: Hey, Shelby Abbott here. I just want to give a heads up before you listen to this next program. Today\u2019s conversation on FamilyLife Today covers some sensitive, but important, subjects that might not be suitable for younger ears. Please use discretion when listening to this next broadcast. Alright, now, let\u2019s jump into it.\r\n\r\nMary: All that horrible stuff happened under evergreen trees. I go outside, and I sit my back against a hemlock tree. I look up, and I say to the Lord, \u201cWould You just be the Daddy who will never leave me?\u201d I didn\u2019t come to the Lord out of the sense of my own sinfulness\u2014of course, that would come\u2014but I just had this desperate hole of needing a dad. That began the many, many, many-year journey of walking out: \u201cWhat does healing look like?\u201d\r\n\r\nShelby: Welcome to FamilyLife Today, where we want to help you pursue the relationships that matter most. I\u2019m Shelby Abbott, and your hosts are Dave and Ann Wilson. You can find us at FamilyLifeToday.com.\r\n\r\nAnn: This is FamilyLife Today.\r\n\r\nDave: I just read somewhere that this author said, \u201cWhen you tell your story, it helps you heal.\u201d Do you feel like telling your abuse story helped you heal?\r\n\r\nAnn: I read that same quote, and I\u2014\r\n\r\nDave: \u2014yes, she might be in the studio with us today. [Laughter]\r\n\r\nAnn: I was resonating with that. I would have never guessed it, because of my own abuse. What you want to do is hide the story, hide yourself, hide everything. You think the last thing you ever want to do is tell your story; but there is something about telling your story that brings healing.\r\n\r\nDave: Yes. So, where are we going today?\r\n\r\nAnn: Mary DeMuth is back with us today.\r\n\r\nMary: Yay!\r\n\r\nAnn: Mary, I\u2019m so glad you\u2019re back. And you\u2019re brave! You\u2019re brave because you enter into areas that not all of us are willing to go into, especially when it comes to our past. You\u2019ve been talking about this for a while. It\u2019s been on your heart [and] on your mind, for healing for those who have been abused. \r\n\r\nShould we go back and retell Mary\u2019s story?\r\n\r\nDave: Yes, I\u2019d love to hear your story. \r\n\r\nA lot of people know you\u2019re an author. I didn\u2019t know this\u2014I\u2019m looking at two books in front of me. One says you wrote 16 books; the other says you wrote 40.\r\n\r\nMary: Now it\u2019s 50.\r\n\r\nDave: What?! [Laughter]\r\n\r\nMary: Yes! 50.\r\n\r\nAnn: Fifty?!\r\n\r\nDave: Really? \r\n\r\nMary: Yes. [Laughter] Crazy, huh?\r\n\r\nDave: Is that right?\r\n\r\nMary: Yes.\r\n\r\nDave: So, there\u2019s been a\u2014\r\n\r\nAnn: \u2014I\u2019m going to bring a trophy the next time you\u2019re in here. [Laughter]\r\n\r\nDave: There are 30-something books\u2014\r\n\r\nAnn: \u2014that\u2019s incredible.\r\n\r\nDave: \u2014after this book? What year did this come out: Not Marked?\r\n\r\nMary: 2013? 2013.\r\n\r\nDave: Wow! You\u2019re one busy writer.\r\n\r\nMary: Yes, I write about three books a year. That makes sense, yes.\r\n\r\nAnn: Three books a year?\r\n\r\nMary: Yes.\r\n\r\nDave: We write about three every ten years! [Laughter] Something like that.\r\n\r\nAnn: Mary, do you know\u2014what are the statistics in terms of who has been abused (the amount): one in what? How many now? Do you know?\r\n\r\nMary: It\u2019s so hard to quantify, but it\u2019s usually said, about six-ish out of ten-ish for women, and three-ish out of ten-ish [for men]. The problem with that is so many people, like what you just said, don\u2019t report.\r\n\r\nAnn: Right.\r\n\r\nMary: And also, we don\u2019t have a very robust view of the definition of sexual abuse. \r\n\r\nThe truth is that, in healing from it, the journey is very similar for [the] creepy uncle [who] puts his hand on your leg, versus the whole full-out problem that could happen. Those people who have had the creepy uncle are not reporting that; and so, a lot of us\u2014many people; almost all\u2014have had some sort of sexual contact that was unwanted. \r\n\r\nAnn: With my story, I didn\u2019t know what sexual abuse was. It wasn\u2019t until I read Dan Allender\u2019s, The Wounded Heart, that I remember saying, \u201cThat is sexual abuse.\u201d Then, that took me into a journey. But I\u2019m thinking you\u2019re right. There are a lot of people who would have no idea that: \u201cThat is sexual abuse.\u201d\r\n\r\nMary: Right. Hence, the under-reporting, plus all the shame associated with it. \r\n\r\nI think, too, even if you look at that in the workplace\u2014harassment. That\u2019s also a form of sexual abuse. I think it is rampant, and I think that\u2019s why it was so bewildering to me in the \u201890s\u2014way back in the olden days of yore [Laughter]\u2014when I would go and teach on this, and I would freak out all the nice coordinators in the back of the room. They\u2019re like, \u201cYou can\u2019t talk about that here.\u201d I could see their eyes get really wide.\r\n\r\nAnn: Where were you teaching?\r\n\r\nMary: Just in Texas\u2014no, this was in Washington state\u2014and I would teach at churches. But then, afterwards, there would be this group\u2014a line of women\u201475 years old, saying, \u201cI\u2019ve never told a soul,\u201d and weeping and just letting it out for the first time. I [thought], \u201cI don\u2019t care if the people don\u2019t like that I talk about this.\u201d I felt like the Lord was calling me to be a pioneer\u2014to go first, so that other people wouldn\u2019t feel alone, because I felt so alone in my story.\r\n\r\nAnn: Me, too, because it\u2019s not something that people\u2014especially, back in the day\u2014were sharing openly. Way to be a pioneer in this area. Thank you!\r\n\r\nDave: I know that, when we speak at the FamilyLife\u00ae Weekend to Remember marriage getaways, Ann will share her story. There\u2019s a Sunday morning, where we split up the husbands [and wives]. After that talk, we come back together, and she\u2019s gone. I can\u2019t even find her, because there\u2019s a line. They\u2019re lining up to talk about her sharing that part of her story. \r\n\r\nAnn: And it was back in the \u201890s when I started sharing that. People weren\u2019t talking about it back then. I was shocked that they would want to talk about it so openly, and happy that they were willing to confess what had happened.\r\n\r\nMary: Yes, yes.\r\n\r\nDave: Give us a little bit of your story so our listeners who haven\u2019t heard you in the past know what we\u2019re talking about; and then, let\u2019s talk about healing.\r\n\r\nMary: I grew up in a pretty scary home, very unprotected. For the first couple of years of my life, I was with my grandparents\u2014which I have a couple of memories of\u2014and then, I went back to live my mom and a man she met at a laundromat who became her husband. This was the \u201860s, so they exchanged flowers instead of rings and all of that.\r\n\r\nI am now five years old. I go to a lady\u2019s house after school because it was half-day kindergarten in those days. Her name was Eva. I affectionately\u2014I guess affectionately is the wrong word\u2014called her Eva, the chain-smoking babysitter. [Laughter] The one thing you need to know about her is that she hated children. Right away, these boys\u2014whom I later find out were next door\u2014knocked on the door of her house. They said, \u201cCan Mary come out and play?\u201d \r\n\r\nFive years old, this began a year-long sexual abuse. It was horrendous.\r\n\r\nDave: How old were these boys?\r\n\r\nMary: They were in their teens, so they were probably 16-18 years old. They were bigger than me.\r\n\r\nAnn: And the babysitter didn\u2019t think, \u201cThis is something\u2014\u201d\r\n\r\nMary: She knew. She knew.\r\n\r\nAnn: She knew?\r\n\r\nMary: She knew.\r\n\r\nAnn: Even from the beginning?\r\n\r\nMary: I\u2019m sure she knew. It\u2019s evil. I mean, there\u2019s really no other word about it.\r\n\r\nAnn: It\u2019s weird that a 16-year-old boy would want to hang out with a 5-year-old girl.\r\n\r\nMary: Right, but if you hate children\u2014\r\n\r\nAnn: \u2014ohhh-\r\n\r\nMary: \u2014and they would take the child off of your hands. \r\n\r\nDuring all this time, I didn\u2019t know anything. I did know it was wrong. That was a gift that the Lord gave me at that time. I wasn\u2019t a Christian, but I knew what they were doing was wrong, and that they were at fault, which is a huge gift, because most sexual abuse victims internalize that guilt. The guilt belongs to the perpetrator, not the victim; but a lot of times, victims will hold that. \r\n\r\nThey would use a bad word to describe what they were doing. They also told me that, if I told my parents, they would kill them. I was terrified. First of all, I was a good little girl. I didn\u2019t want to say that bad word. Second of all, I didn\u2019t want to be responsible for their demise. \r\n\r\nI was a pretty sophisticated five-year-old. I had all these thoughts about all of this. Finally, about three quarters of the way through the year, I decided that the safest person to tell was Eva, the chain-smoking babysitter. She said these five words to me. She said, \u201cI will tell your mom!\u201d And I believed her. So, the next day, I thought, \u201cI\u2019m set free!\u201d And the knock came at the door. That evil woman pushed me back out. \r\n\r\nAt that point, I was like, \u201cOkay, parents don\u2019t care,\u201d because I thought she told them. \u201cSo, I am going to have to protect myself.\u201d I learned how to sleep. I would come home from half-day kindergarten. I would eat my peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I would run to Eva, the chain-smoking babysitter\u2019s bed, pull the covers over my head and pretend to sleep for the whole afternoon. That did save me, because at least I was out of her\u2014I figured out her formula; I just needed to be out of her hair.\r\n\r\nAnd then, we moved at the end of that year.\r\n\r\nAnn: I just have to say\u2014\r\n\r\nMary: \u2014I know you\u2019re already tearing up. I\u2019m so sorry. \r\n\r\nAnn: \u2014just imagining\u2014first of all, you\u2019re a smart little girl to figure out how to get out of this; but I\u2019m imagining\u2014this little Mary, hiding in the bed, with the covers over your head to protect yourself. [Emotion in voice] It\u2019s the saddest thing ever!\r\n\r\nMary: It\u2019s so sad.\r\n\r\nDave: I\u2019ll throw this in, from a guy\u2019s perspective, as Ann\u2019s husband; do you two ever experience\u2014when I hear that, I get angry\u2014[anger].\r\n\r\nAnn: When I was reading Mary\u2019s story through the book, I was like, \u201cThis is so wrong! Where\u2019s the justice?!\u201d\r\n\r\nDave: Did you experience that part? Or is that later or never?\r\n\r\nMary: I was too traumatized at the time. \r\n\r\nDave: Yes.\r\n\r\nMary: But interestingly enough\u2014yes, of course, [I was] very angry\u2014but I was more angry at other people. I was more angry at my mom for not protecting me; I was angry at my biological father, who was also a sexual predator, and was grooming me to be his next victim before he took his life.\r\n\r\nAnn: Ugh!\r\n\r\nMary: But there was plenty of sexual abuse that happened from him to me. My biological father was doing that as well. There was a lot of anger. I\u2019m still mad at him, to be super honest.\r\n\r\nDave: I love this: \u201cchain-smoking babysitter\u201d\u2014[Laughter]\u2014you found out she never told your mom? Or did she tell her later? \r\n\r\nAnn: Yes, keep going in your story.\r\n\r\nMary: She didn\u2019t, but I lived with the belief that she had for ten years.\r\n\r\nDave: Ten years.\r\n\r\nAnn: You\u2019re wondering, \u201cWhy isn\u2019t my mom rescuing me?\u201d\r\n\r\nMary: Yes, exactly! And the other thing that happened to me\u2014and it\u2019s why the title of the book is Not Marked\u2014is that I felt like I had this \u201cCome get me\u201d sign on my forehead, like I had been marked by these predators. \r\n\r\nI had several different instances throughout my life where I, thankfully, was a runner; and I would run away from any of those endless\u2014thankfully, able to escape several different times of predatory teenage boys or men, who were trying to do that, again, to me. I thought, \u201cWhat in the heck is wrong with me? Do I have some sort of honing beacon?\u201d  \r\n\r\n[Since] I had been so traumatized [and] so neglected, I had to learn, later in life, that I had to heal from those wounds, or I would continue to be preyed on. I realized that I had to settle that worth with the Lord; otherwise, I kept repeating those patterns. Even in female friendships, I would [think], \u201cWhy do I keep coming to these narcissistic folks?\u201d I found out I was constantly attracted to narcissistic predators, because I was trying to complete a circle of the story: \u201cIf I can get a narcissistic predator to love me, I can prove I\u2019m finally loveable to my parents.\u201d \r\n\r\nBut then, I realized: \u201cNo, I have to prove I\u2019m loveable to the One who created me.\u201d When I settled that, I stopped trying to complete that story in an unhealthy way. I hope that makes sense.\r\n\r\nAnn: Yes.\r\n\r\nDave: It makes sense, but I want you to explain it more. [Laughter] What do you mean you had to understand you are loved by your Creator?\r\n\r\nAnn: Bring Jesus into the picture. What happened there?\r\n\r\nMary: Right. We had my father die when I was ten; my mother remarried again, and so, I had three fathers by that time. We moved several different times. And then, the seventh and eighth grade years were years of suicidal ideation, because I would look at the ground, and my feet standing on the ground, and say, \u201cWhy am I here except to be neglected or abused?\u201d\r\n\r\nDuring this time, my mom was never home; my stepdad was working a graveyard [shift]. I was an only child, and I was living on a farm with seven horses. I would come home from school, and I would be completely alone until ten o\u2019clock at night. I learned how to cook, which is\u2014I\u2019m a good cook now\u2014\r\n\r\nAnn: \u2014this is like the most tragic story!\r\n\r\nMary: I know it is. It\u2019s getting better, I promise! I\u2019m going to meet Jesus. I promise!\r\n\r\nAnn: I\u2019m telling you, though, it shows God\u2019s grace and redemption. \r\n\r\nLet me ask you, Mary, because I\u2019ve recently done this\u2014I had somebody ask me the question: \u201cPicture your life, growing up, and the things that you went through. Could you see places where God was wooing you? [Where]He was showing you?\u201d \r\n\r\nI went back into those days of abuse. I remember, some abuse had just happened; I remember being outside. I was four or five years old. I saw a tree in the spring, heavy-laden, with these flowers. I can remember pulling the limb down, and it was so low. These gorgeous pink\u2014it was probably a flowering crab [with] pink fragrant flowers\u2014and I remember smelling them. It filled my heart with this happiness. That\u2019s what came to my mind when somebody said, \u201cDo you have recollection of God wooing you? Of saying, \u2018I see you\u2019?\u201d \r\n\r\nHave you ever thought through that?\r\n\r\nMary: Yes, definitely. For me, a lot of that abuse happened at the root of an evergreen tree. I think, in some ways, the Lord has created the human body in such a way that protects us. I did disassociate and fly up to the top of those trees. That disassociation was a gift; but I also\u2014little things\u2014, like all the music I was attracted to, as a child and then as a young adult, had Christian themes to them.\r\n\r\nAnn: Really?\r\n\r\nMary: When I was in the sixth grade, my grandmother, who never went to church, said, \u201cYou need to get baptized.\u201d They took me to this church. The requirement was that you had to go to one Sunday school class. I [went] to one Sunday school class. We made Jericho out of these cardboard bricks and kicked them over in the name of Jesus. [Laughter] I [said], \u201cI want to go back.\u201d My mom said, \u201cNo, you\u2019re not going back.\u201d This is where I am\u2014at seventh and eighth grade, to get back to the story\u2014suicidal ideation; writing suicide poetry. \r\n\r\nAnd here\u2019s what I want to say to those of you who are in children\u2019s lives: there was a counselor who saw where I was, and I believe he was a Christ-follower. He allowed me to come into his office at any moment. I was this little girl, who was this total straight-A student, but I would cry in the middle of class; because at this point, my mom\u2019s third marriage was breaking up. That man, I had kind of attached myself to. He was going to be leaving\u2014and I was going to lose everything. So, he [the counselor] was there for me that year. I see the hand of God in that.\r\n\r\nAnd then, the next year\u2014my ninth grade year, a friend of mine invited me to Young Life. She said, \u201cIt\u2019s really fun. There are cute guys there.\u201d [Laughter] I said, \u201cOkay, cool.\u201d [Laughter] But after all the fun, and the shaving cream, and singing songs, someone would stand up, and they would talk about Jesus. Every time I heard the name of Jesus, my heart would just pound out of my chest. That whole year, I would hear about Jesus. \r\n\r\nAnd then, my sophomore year, I went to a weekend retreat where they gave the whole gospel. What is so poignant about what scholars call inclusio, when you have something that starts here and ends here\u2014you also see it in the Genesis narrative, and you also see it in the book of Ruth; or chiasm: you start at the same place you finish. \r\n\r\nAll that horrible stuff happened under evergreen trees. I go outside, and I sit my back against a hemlock tree in the Seattle area. I look up, and I say to the Lord, \u201cWould You just be the Daddy who will never leave me?\u201d I didn\u2019t come to the Lord out of the sense of my own sinfulness\u2014of course, that would come\u2014but I had this desperate hole of needing a dad. I like to tell audiences, \u201cAnd then, I was completely healed, and everything was fine.\u201d [Laughter]\r\n\r\nAnn: Wouldn\u2019t that be nice?! [Laughter]\r\n\r\nMary: But that began the many, many, many-year journey of walking out: \u201cWhat does healing look like?\u201d Some of that is: \u201cHow can marriage be a place of healing for a sexual-abuse victim?\u201d How we\u2014my husband wrote in this book as well\u2014how we, together, worked this very traumatic issue.\r\n\r\nAnn: Can you give us a taste. Let\u2019s start walking into that, and we\u2019ll continue it into tomorrow; but give us a taste of what that started like, how that healing journey started with your husband.\r\n\r\nMary: Well,\u2014Dave: \u2014or even before your husband.\r\n\r\nMary: Yes!\r\n\r\nAnn: Yes, yes.\r\n\r\nMary: I\u2019ll back up slightly. I cried a lot, because I just loved Jesus\u2014and people loved me\u2014these Young Life leaders would love me; it was very powerful. When I got to college, I found a group of friends that actually believed that God healed people. They prayed for me for four years, and I wept. \r\n\r\nWhen I finished college, I was thinking, \u201cOh, good! I\u2019m done with that.\u201d [Noise as if checking things off a list] When I got married, we had the conversation. I didn\u2019t withhold it from him, but I had told him, \u201cBut that\u2019s in the past, and God\u2019s healed me of that.\u201d Hahaha! \r\n\r\nAnn: This was our [Ann with Dave] conversation: \u201cI\u2019m good now, because I know Jesus.\u201d\r\n\r\nMary: \u201cJesus healed me.\u201d \r\n\r\nI did a lot of pressing down of that story, and when all these triggers and things would come up, I would have these frustrating evangelical voices in my head that said, \u201cYou have to be all sexy for your husband.\u201d I was paralyzed by it. And then, constantly felt guilty that I wasn\u2019t fulfilling my duties. \r\n\r\nThat will\u2014I think, when we talk tomorrow, I\u2019ll tell why I wrote this book, which goes back to that story; it was excruciating. I cannot tell you how excruciating it was for me to talk about sex with my husband. It felt like I wanted to barf; it was just so hard, because I could not see it as beautiful. I could not see it\u2014we\u2019d gone to a FamilyLife\u00ae marriage conference, [but] I couldn\u2019t see it as the gift God gives spouses. I could only see it as trauma. \r\n\r\nFor me to bring it up felt like I was really broken, really damaged. He had to suffer the consequences. Talk about being mad! He was mad at those boys, too, because they stole something from me that caused me to really not engage in the act of marriage. I just did what I did naturally; I flew up into the tree limbs, and I watched everything happen, but I couldn\u2019t put my body there, because I was still too traumatized, and I was so little trauma-informed that I didn\u2019t know what was going on with me. \r\n\r\nWe weren\u2019t talking about that at that time in the \u201890s. I just didn\u2019t know, so I was constantly feeling defeated, like I was failing my husband. I also was completely shaky, and freaked out, and trying to pull myself up by my bootstraps. Now, I wish I could go back and see what the Lord was seeing there. I know He just wanted to hold me through all of that, but I was just broken.\r\n\r\nAnn: What would you do differently, knowing what you know now? And I\u2019m thinking of a listener who\u2019s saying, \u201cI\u2019m going through that right now. I haven\u2019t really dealt with it; I\u2019m feeling those same things. I just disassociate when it comes to any kind of physical intimacy.\u201d What would you say to her?\r\n\r\nMary: First, \u201can untold story never heals.\u201d She needs (or he needs) to pour out that story. Sometimes, people cannot do it verbally. So, write it down and slide it across to a safe person; that person needs to be safe. Find a safe person, and let them read it first if you can\u2019t say it out loud. Get it out first.\r\n\r\nBut the second is trauma-informed counseling, and especially someone who deals in sexual abuse. And even if you could go further, [someone who understands] sexual abuse and then, who\u2019s a marriage expert, because it\u2019s just such a complicated thing. It is the best gift that you\u2019ll give that part of your marriage, for sure.\r\n\r\nBut we were poor. I mean, I wanted counseling, but we just had no\u2014\r\n\r\nAnn: \u2014and counseling wasn\u2019t a thing, back then, the way it is now.\r\n\r\nMary: No! I actually wanted it, but we just didn\u2019t\u2014I was a stay-at-home mom; we had no money. And the first time I was finally able to get counseling was when my husband was in seminary. They said that wives could go to counseling [with] the people training to be counselors for free. I was like, \u201cFinally!\u201d I began that journey then.\r\n\r\nDave: You were really not talking to anybody, except your husband\u2014\r\n\r\nMary: \u2014correct; yes.\r\n\r\nDave: \u2014for a while.\r\n\r\nMary: A couple of friends knew as well. Again, they didn\u2019t necessarily have my\u2014I had a pretty traumatic story, so they didn\u2019t know how to counsel me. He didn\u2019t have that story; he didn\u2019t know how to counsel me. And then, you\u2019re dealing with the hurt and pain he was experiencing, which I just couldn\u2019t carry; because I was carrying so much of my own. The transition began to happen later. We kind of muddled our way through. We\u2019ll talk about that in the next episode. \r\n\r\nAnn: I think that\u2019s, too, why your book is so powerful\u2014to have your husband\u2019s voice in it as well, to say: \u201cThis is what it was like,\u201d and \u201cThis is what you can do.\u201d\r\n\r\nShelby: I\u2019m Shelby Abbott, and you\u2019ve been listening to Dave and Ann Wilson with Mary DeMuth on FamilyLife Today. You know, this topic is always so complex and can even be difficult to even approach. I\u2019m so glad Mary was with us today to be honest about sexual abuse and its effect on our lives. I, personally, am a sexual-abuse survivor. Hearing her talk about it is something that will, no doubt, be part of the healing process, not only for me, but for you, too, if this is your story. \r\n\r\nMary has written a book called Not Marked: Finding Hope &amp;amp; Healing After Sexual Abuse. Not only is this her story, but it offers some added perspective from Mary\u2019s husband, Patrick, to support any spouses who want to foster healing and strengthen their relationship with their spouse if they\u2019ve gone through something traumatic like this. \r\n\r\nYou can get your copy of Mary\u2019s book, Not Marked, right now by going online to FamilyLifeToday.com to request your copy there. Or you can give us a call at 800-358-6329; again, that number is 800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\r\n\r\nThis topic is, obviously, difficult. And it\u2019s a part of families everywhere. That\u2019s one of the reasons why we, at FamilyLife, are so passionate about helping to reach marriages and families. It hits you right at home, and we want to be part of the solution in your life. One of the ways we\u2019re able to do that is we have partners who come alongside us, give monthly, and help support the ministry of FamilyLife. \r\n\r\nIf you want to be a part of the solution, and join us in this ministry, we\u2019d love it if you\u2019d become a monthly partner. The cool thing is, all this month\u2014in the month of May, every donation that you give will be matched dollar-for-dollar, up to $550,000. You can learn a little more about the details by going online to FamilyLifeToday.com and clicking on the \u201cDonate Now\u201d button at the top of the page. Or, again, you can give us a call at the number: 800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \r\n\r\nNow, tomorrow, Mary DeMuth is back with the Wilsons to talk about how past trauma impacts your marriage. She\u2019s going to talk about discovering healing and getting some advice from abuse survivors. That\u2019s coming up tomorrow; we hope you\u2019ll join us. \r\n\r\nOn behalf of Dave and Ann Wilson, I\u2019m Shelby Abbott. We will see you back next time for another edition of FamilyLife Today. \r\n\r\nFamilyLife Today is a donor-supported production of FamilyLife, a Cru\u00ae Ministry. \r\n\r\nHelping you pursue the relationships that matter most.\r\n\r\nWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider donating today to help defray the costs?  \r\n\r\nCopyright \u00a9 2024 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\r\n\r\nwww.FamilyLife                                 \r\n\r\n\n"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-308507.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-308507.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-e11dbe9f{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-e11dbe9f > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;padding-top: 3em;padding-bottom: 3em;padding-left: 1.5em;padding-right: 1.5em;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;background-color: #f8f8f8;;}@media only screen and (max-width: 976px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-e11dbe9f{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-e11dbe9f > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f{padding-top: 3px;padding-bottom: 3px;padding-left: 1.5px;padding-right: 1.5px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-color: #f8f8f8;;}}@media only screen and (max-width: 767px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-e11dbe9f{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-e11dbe9f > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f{padding-top: 3px;padding-bottom: 3px;padding-left: 1.5px;padding-right: 1.5px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-color: #f8f8f8;;}}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-85559158 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-85559158 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-85559158 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-85559158 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-85559158 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-85559158{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-85559158 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 960px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-85559158{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;padding-top: 0px;padding-bottom: 0px;padding-left: 10px;padding-right: 10px;margin-top: 60px !important;margin-bottom: 60px !important;margin-left: 0px;margin-right: 0px;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ea16301a .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ea16301a .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ea16301a .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ea16301a .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ea16301a .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-ea16301a{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-ea16301a > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ea16301a.uagb-layout-grid > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{row-gap: 40px;column-gap: 40px;grid-template-columns: minmax( 1px, 1fr)  minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;grid-template-rows: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;align-items: start;justify-items: stretch;align-content: stretch;justify-content: stretch;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ea16301a{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;padding-top: 0px;padding-bottom: 0px;padding-left: 0px;padding-right: 0px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ea16301a.wp-block-uagb-container > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not( .spectra-container-link-overlay ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox):not(.wp-block-uagb-lottie):not(.uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap){width: auto !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ea16301a.wp-block-uagb-container > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox){width: auto !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-26ccc5c9 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-26ccc5c9 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-26ccc5c9 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-26ccc5c9 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-26ccc5c9 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-26ccc5c9{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-26ccc5c9 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: flex-start;flex-wrap: nowrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-26ccc5c9{min-height: 710px;box-shadow: 3px 7px 7px -1px rgba(0,0,0,0.15) ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;background-color: #ffffff;;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: flex-start;flex-wrap: nowrap;align-self: start;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-84f50fa3 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-84f50fa3 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-84f50fa3 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-84f50fa3 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-84f50fa3 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;background: url(https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/07\/Grow-with-your-family_545x307.jpg) 50% 50%;;background-size: cover;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-84f50fa3{max-width: 100vw;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-84f50fa3 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-84f50fa3{min-height: 250px;box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;background-repeat: no-repeat;background-position: 50% 50%;background-size: cover;background-attachment: scroll;background-image: url(https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2025\/03\/Grow-with-your-family_545x307.webp);background-clip: padding-box;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-271bf38d .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-271bf38d .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-271bf38d .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-271bf38d .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-271bf38d .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-271bf38d{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-271bf38d > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;row-gap: 40px;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-271bf38d{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;padding-top: 20px;padding-bottom: 40px;padding-left: 40px;padding-right: 40px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;row-gap: 40px;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-ab8d0982{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-ab8d0982 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982.uagb-layout-grid{row-gap: 8px;column-gap: 8px;grid-template-columns: auto  minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;grid-template-rows: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;align-items: stretch;justify-items: stretch;align-content: stretch;justify-content: stretch;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982.wp-block-uagb-container > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not( .spectra-container-link-overlay ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox):not(.wp-block-uagb-lottie):not(.uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap){width: auto !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982.wp-block-uagb-container > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox){width: auto !important;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d4c1a7e3.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-heading-text{color: #25282a;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d4c1a7e3.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-desc-text{margin-bottom: 15px;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d4c1a7e3.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight{font-style: normal;font-weight: Default;background: #007cba;color: #fff;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d4c1a7e3.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight::-moz-selection{color: #fff;background: #007cba;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d4c1a7e3.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight::selection{color: #fff;background: #007cba;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d4c1a7e3 .uagb-heading-text{font-weight: 300;font-size: 16px;}.uagb-block-f9d54988.wp-block-uagb-separator{text-align: left;}.uagb-block-f9d54988.wp-block-uagb-separator--text .wp-block-uagb-separator-element .uagb-html-tag{font-style: normal;line-height: 1em;}.uagb-block-f9d54988 .uagb-separator-spacing-wrapper{padding-top: 4px;padding-bottom: 4px;}.uagb-block-f9d54988.wp-block-uagb-separator:not(.wp-block-uagb-separator--text):not(.wp-block-uagb-separator--icon) .wp-block-uagb-separator__inner{-webkit-mask-size: 5px 100%;border-top-width: 3px;width: 100%;border-top-color: #eabe5e;border-top-style: solid;margin-top: 5px;margin-bottom: 5px;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-3208cc36.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-heading-text{color: #006a5a;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-3208cc36.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-desc-text{margin-bottom: 15px;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-3208cc36.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight{font-style: normal;font-weight: Default;background: #007cba;color: #fff;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-3208cc36.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight::-moz-selection{color: #fff;background: #007cba;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-3208cc36.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight::selection{color: #fff;background: #007cba;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-3208cc36 .uagb-heading-text{font-weight: 400;font-size: 26px;line-height: 1.2em;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .uagb-icon-list__source-image{width: 18px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap svg{width: 18px;height: 18px;font-size: 18px;color: #1573a2;fill: #1573a2;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{padding: 0px;border-radius: 0px;border-width: 0px;align-self: center;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__label{font-size: 20px;text-decoration: !important;line-height: em;color: #1573a2;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .uagb-icon-list__wrap{display: flex;flex-direction: column;justify-content: center;-webkit-box-pack: center;-ms-flex-pack: center;-webkit-box-align: flex-start;-ms-flex-align: flex-start;align-items: flex-start;padding-top: 0px;padding-right: 0px;padding-bottom: 0px;padding-left: 0px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .uagb-icon-list__label{text-align: left;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child{text-decoration: !important;font-size: 20px;line-height: em;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd.wp-block-uagb-icon-list .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child{margin-left: 0;margin-right: 0;margin-bottom: 24px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{margin-left: 15px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child {flex-direction: row-reverse;}.uagb-block-fdd052c2.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-fdd052c2.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child:hover .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-679dc0da.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-679dc0da.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child:hover .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-fbb8dca6.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-fbb8dca6.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child:hover .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-b5e9a44d.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-b5e9a44d.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child:hover .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-10525170.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-10525170.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child:hover .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-48a597f8 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-48a597f8 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-48a597f8 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-48a597f8 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-48a597f8 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-48a597f8{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-48a597f8 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: flex-start;flex-wrap: nowrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-48a597f8{min-height: 710px;box-shadow: 3px 7px 7px -1px rgba(0,0,0,0.15) ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;background-color: #ffffff;;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: flex-start;flex-wrap: nowrap;align-self: start;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-22a41c70 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-22a41c70 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-22a41c70 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-22a41c70 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-22a41c70 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;background: url(https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/07\/Grow-with-your-family_545x307.jpg) 50% 50%;;background-size: cover;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-22a41c70{max-width: 100vw;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-22a41c70 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-22a41c70{min-height: 250px;box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;background-repeat: no-repeat;background-position: 50% 50%;background-size: cover;background-attachment: scroll;background-image: url(https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2025\/03\/HelpFamiliesGrow2.webp);background-clip: padding-box;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-562935bf .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-562935bf .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-562935bf .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-562935bf .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-562935bf .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-562935bf{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-562935bf > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;row-gap: 40px;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-562935bf{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;padding-top: 20px;padding-bottom: 40px;padding-left: 40px;padding-right: 40px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;row-gap: 40px;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-5a1442f2{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-5a1442f2 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2.uagb-layout-grid{row-gap: 8px;column-gap: 8px;grid-template-columns: auto  minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;grid-template-rows: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;align-items: stretch;justify-items: stretch;align-content: stretch;justify-content: stretch;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2.wp-block-uagb-container > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not( .spectra-container-link-overlay ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox):not(.wp-block-uagb-lottie):not(.uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap){width: auto !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2.wp-block-uagb-container > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox){width: auto !important;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d9c0200f.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-heading-text{color: #25282a;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d9c0200f.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-desc-text{margin-bottom: 15px;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d9c0200f.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight{font-style: normal;font-weight: Default;background: #007cba;color: #fff;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d9c0200f.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight::-moz-selection{color: #fff;background: #007cba;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d9c0200f.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight::selection{color: #fff;background: #007cba;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d9c0200f .uagb-heading-text{font-weight: 300;font-size: 16px;}.uagb-block-aa17f10e.wp-block-uagb-separator{text-align: left;}.uagb-block-aa17f10e.wp-block-uagb-separator--text .wp-block-uagb-separator-element .uagb-html-tag{font-style: normal;line-height: 1em;}.uagb-block-aa17f10e .uagb-separator-spacing-wrapper{padding-top: 4px;padding-bottom: 4px;}.uagb-block-aa17f10e.wp-block-uagb-separator:not(.wp-block-uagb-separator--text):not(.wp-block-uagb-separator--icon) .wp-block-uagb-separator__inner{-webkit-mask-size: 5px 100%;border-top-width: 3px;width: 100%;border-top-color: #eabe5e;border-top-style: solid;margin-top: 5px;margin-bottom: 5px;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-31f155e3.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-heading-text{color: #006a5a;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-31f155e3.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-desc-text{margin-bottom: 15px;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-31f155e3.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight{font-style: normal;font-weight: Default;background: #007cba;color: #fff;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-31f155e3.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight::-moz-selection{color: #fff;background: #007cba;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-31f155e3.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight::selection{color: #fff;background: #007cba;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-31f155e3 .uagb-heading-text{font-weight: 400;font-size: 26px;line-height: 1.2em;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .uagb-icon-list__source-image{width: 18px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap svg{width: 18px;height: 18px;font-size: 18px;color: #1573a2;fill: #1573a2;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{padding: 0px;border-radius: 0px;border-width: 0px;align-self: center;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__label{font-size: 20px;text-decoration: !important;line-height: em;color: #1573a2;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .uagb-icon-list__wrap{display: flex;flex-direction: column;justify-content: center;-webkit-box-pack: center;-ms-flex-pack: center;-webkit-box-align: flex-start;-ms-flex-align: flex-start;align-items: flex-start;padding-top: 0px;padding-right: 0px;padding-bottom: 0px;padding-left: 0px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .uagb-icon-list__label{text-align: left;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child{text-decoration: !important;font-size: 20px;line-height: em;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64.wp-block-uagb-icon-list .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child{margin-left: 0;margin-right: 0;margin-bottom: 24px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{margin-left: 15px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child {flex-direction: row-reverse;}.uagb-block-83befcbf.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-83befcbf.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child:hover .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-75d2f158.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-75d2f158.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child:hover .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-0d14af90.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-0d14af90.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child:hover .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-4dd6f9d3.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-4dd6f9d3.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child:hover .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-28c58e21.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}.uagb-block-28c58e21.wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child:hover .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{background:  !important;border-color:  !important;}@media only screen and (max-width: 976px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-85559158{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-85559158 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-85559158{padding-top: 0px;padding-bottom: 0px;padding-left: 10px;padding-right: 10px;margin-top: 60px !important;margin-bottom: 60px !important;margin-left: 0px;margin-right: 0px;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-ea16301a{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-ea16301a > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ea16301a.uagb-layout-grid > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{grid-template-columns: minmax( 1px, 1fr)  minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;grid-template-rows: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;align-items: stretch;justify-items: stretch;align-content: stretch;justify-content: stretch;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ea16301a{padding-top: 0px;padding-bottom: 0px;padding-left: 0px;padding-right: 0px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-26ccc5c9{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-26ccc5c9 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-26ccc5c9{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-color: #ffffff;;grid-column: span 1;grid-row: span 1;align-self: stretch;justify-self: stretch;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-84f50fa3{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-84f50fa3 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-84f50fa3{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-position: 54% 48%;background-size: cover;background-image: url(https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2025\/03\/Grow-with-your-family_545x307.webp);background-clip: padding-box;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-271bf38d{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-271bf38d > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-271bf38d{padding-top: 20px;padding-bottom: 40px;padding-left: 40px;padding-right: 40px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-ab8d0982{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-ab8d0982 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982.uagb-layout-grid{grid-template-columns: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;grid-template-rows: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;align-items: stretch;justify-items: stretch;align-content: stretch;justify-content: stretch;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982.wp-block-uagb-container > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not( .spectra-container-link-overlay ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox):not(.wp-block-uagb-lottie):not(.uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap){width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982.wp-block-uagb-container > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox){width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d4c1a7e3 .uagb-heading-text{font-size: 12px;letter-spacing: 1px;}.uagb-block-f9d54988.wp-block-uagb-separator{text-align: center;}.uagb-block-f9d54988.wp-block-uagb-separator--text .wp-block-uagb-separator-element .uagb-html-tag{font-style: normal;margin-bottom: initial;line-height: 1em;}.uagb-block-f9d54988 .uagb-separator-spacing-wrapper{padding-top: 10px;padding-bottom: 10px;}.uagb-block-f9d54988.wp-block-uagb-separator:not(.wp-block-uagb-separator--text):not(.wp-block-uagb-separator--icon) .wp-block-uagb-separator__inner{-webkit-mask-size: 5px 100%;width: 100%;border-top-color: #eabe5e;border-top-style: solid;margin-top: 5px;margin-bottom: 5px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .uagb-icon-list__source-image{width: 18px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap svg{width: 18px;height: 18px;font-size: 18px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap {padding: 0px;border-width: 0px;align-self: center;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .uagb-icon-list__wrap{display: flex;flex-direction: column;justify-content: center;-webkit-box-pack: center;-ms-flex-pack: center;-webkit-box-align: flex-start;-ms-flex-align: flex-start;align-items: flex-start;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd.wp-block-uagb-icon-list .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child{margin-left: 0;margin-right: 0;margin-bottom: 24px;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-48a597f8{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-48a597f8 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-48a597f8{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-color: #ffffff;;grid-column: span 1;grid-row: span 1;align-self: stretch;justify-self: stretch;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-22a41c70{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-22a41c70 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-22a41c70{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-position: 54% 48%;background-size: cover;background-image: url(https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2025\/03\/HelpFamiliesGrow2.webp);background-clip: padding-box;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-562935bf{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-562935bf > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-562935bf{padding-top: 20px;padding-bottom: 40px;padding-left: 40px;padding-right: 40px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-5a1442f2{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-5a1442f2 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2.uagb-layout-grid{grid-template-columns: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;grid-template-rows: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;align-items: stretch;justify-items: stretch;align-content: stretch;justify-content: stretch;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2.wp-block-uagb-container > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not( .spectra-container-link-overlay ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox):not(.wp-block-uagb-lottie):not(.uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap){width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2.wp-block-uagb-container > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox){width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d9c0200f .uagb-heading-text{font-size: 12px;letter-spacing: 1px;}.uagb-block-aa17f10e.wp-block-uagb-separator{text-align: center;}.uagb-block-aa17f10e.wp-block-uagb-separator--text .wp-block-uagb-separator-element .uagb-html-tag{font-style: normal;margin-bottom: initial;line-height: 1em;}.uagb-block-aa17f10e .uagb-separator-spacing-wrapper{padding-top: 10px;padding-bottom: 10px;}.uagb-block-aa17f10e.wp-block-uagb-separator:not(.wp-block-uagb-separator--text):not(.wp-block-uagb-separator--icon) .wp-block-uagb-separator__inner{-webkit-mask-size: 5px 100%;width: 100%;border-top-color: #eabe5e;border-top-style: solid;margin-top: 5px;margin-bottom: 5px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .uagb-icon-list__source-image{width: 18px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap svg{width: 18px;height: 18px;font-size: 18px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap {padding: 0px;border-width: 0px;align-self: center;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .uagb-icon-list__wrap{display: flex;flex-direction: column;justify-content: center;-webkit-box-pack: center;-ms-flex-pack: center;-webkit-box-align: flex-start;-ms-flex-align: flex-start;align-items: flex-start;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64.wp-block-uagb-icon-list .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child{margin-left: 0;margin-right: 0;margin-bottom: 24px;}}@media only screen and (max-width: 767px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-85559158{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-85559158 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-85559158{padding-top: 0px;padding-bottom: 0px;padding-left: 10px;padding-right: 10px;margin-top: 60px !important;margin-bottom: 60px !important;margin-left: 0px;margin-right: 0px;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-ea16301a{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-ea16301a > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ea16301a.uagb-layout-grid > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{grid-template-columns: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;grid-template-rows: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;align-items: stretch;justify-items: stretch;align-content: stretch;justify-content: stretch;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ea16301a{padding-top: 0px;padding-bottom: 0px;padding-left: 0px;padding-right: 0px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-26ccc5c9{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-26ccc5c9 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-26ccc5c9{padding-top: 0px;padding-bottom: 0px;padding-left: 0px;padding-right: 0px;margin-top: 0px !important;margin-bottom: 0px !important;margin-left: 0px;margin-right: 0px;order: initial;background-color: #ffffff;;flex-wrap: wrap;grid-column: span 1;grid-row: span 1;align-self: stretch;justify-self: stretch;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-84f50fa3{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-84f50fa3 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-84f50fa3{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-image: url(https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2025\/03\/Grow-with-your-family_545x307.webp);background-clip: padding-box;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-271bf38d{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-271bf38d > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-271bf38d{padding-top: 20px;padding-bottom: 40px;padding-left: 40px;padding-right: 40px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-ab8d0982{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-ab8d0982 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982.uagb-layout-grid{grid-template-columns: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;grid-template-rows: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;align-items: stretch;justify-items: stretch;align-content: stretch;justify-content: stretch;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982.wp-block-uagb-container > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not( .spectra-container-link-overlay ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox):not(.wp-block-uagb-lottie):not(.uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap){width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ab8d0982.wp-block-uagb-container > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox){width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d4c1a7e3.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading {padding-left: 40px;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d4c1a7e3 .uagb-heading-text{letter-spacing: 4px;}.uagb-block-f9d54988.wp-block-uagb-separator{text-align: center;}.uagb-block-f9d54988.wp-block-uagb-separator--text .wp-block-uagb-separator-element .uagb-html-tag{font-style: normal;margin-bottom: initial;line-height: 1em;}.uagb-block-f9d54988 .uagb-separator-spacing-wrapper{padding-top: 10px;padding-bottom: 10px;}.uagb-block-f9d54988.wp-block-uagb-separator:not(.wp-block-uagb-separator--text):not(.wp-block-uagb-separator--icon) .wp-block-uagb-separator__inner{-webkit-mask-size: 5px 100%;width: 100%;border-top-color: #eabe5e;border-top-style: solid;margin-top: 5px;margin-bottom: 5px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .uagb-icon-list__source-image{width: 18px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap svg{width: 18px;height: 18px;font-size: 18px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{padding: 0px;border-width: 0px;align-self: center;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd .uagb-icon-list__wrap{display: flex;flex-direction: column;justify-content: center;-webkit-box-pack: center;-ms-flex-pack: center;-webkit-box-align: flex-start;-ms-flex-align: flex-start;align-items: flex-start;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-cbb8c5bd.wp-block-uagb-icon-list .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child{margin-left: 0;margin-right: 0;margin-bottom: 24px;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-48a597f8{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-48a597f8 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-48a597f8{padding-top: 0px;padding-bottom: 0px;padding-left: 0px;padding-right: 0px;margin-top: 0px !important;margin-bottom: 0px !important;margin-left: 0px;margin-right: 0px;order: initial;background-color: #ffffff;;flex-wrap: wrap;grid-column: span 1;grid-row: span 1;align-self: stretch;justify-self: stretch;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-22a41c70{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-22a41c70 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-22a41c70{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-image: url(https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2025\/03\/HelpFamiliesGrow2.webp);background-clip: padding-box;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-562935bf{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-562935bf > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-562935bf{padding-top: 20px;padding-bottom: 40px;padding-left: 40px;padding-right: 40px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-5a1442f2{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-5a1442f2 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2.uagb-layout-grid{grid-template-columns: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;grid-template-rows: minmax( 1px, 1fr) ;align-items: stretch;justify-items: stretch;align-content: stretch;justify-content: stretch;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2.wp-block-uagb-container > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not( .spectra-container-link-overlay ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox):not(.wp-block-uagb-lottie):not(.uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap){width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5a1442f2.wp-block-uagb-container > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox){width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d9c0200f.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading {padding-left: 40px;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-d9c0200f .uagb-heading-text{letter-spacing: 4px;}.uagb-block-aa17f10e.wp-block-uagb-separator{text-align: center;}.uagb-block-aa17f10e.wp-block-uagb-separator--text .wp-block-uagb-separator-element .uagb-html-tag{font-style: normal;margin-bottom: initial;line-height: 1em;}.uagb-block-aa17f10e .uagb-separator-spacing-wrapper{padding-top: 10px;padding-bottom: 10px;}.uagb-block-aa17f10e.wp-block-uagb-separator:not(.wp-block-uagb-separator--text):not(.wp-block-uagb-separator--icon) .wp-block-uagb-separator__inner{-webkit-mask-size: 5px 100%;width: 100%;border-top-color: #eabe5e;border-top-style: solid;margin-top: 5px;margin-bottom: 5px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .uagb-icon-list__source-image{width: 18px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap svg{width: 18px;height: 18px;font-size: 18px;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child .uagb-icon-list__source-wrap{padding: 0px;border-width: 0px;align-self: center;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64 .uagb-icon-list__wrap{display: flex;flex-direction: column;justify-content: center;-webkit-box-pack: center;-ms-flex-pack: center;-webkit-box-align: flex-start;-ms-flex-align: flex-start;align-items: flex-start;}.wp-block-uagb-icon-list.uagb-block-ced20c64.wp-block-uagb-icon-list .wp-block-uagb-icon-list-child{margin-left: 0;margin-right: 0;margin-bottom: 24px;}}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ecebc267 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ecebc267 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ecebc267 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ecebc267 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ecebc267 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-ecebc267{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ecebc267{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;background: linear-gradient(130deg, #ffffff 60%, #f8f8f8 46%);;background-clip: padding-box;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;}@media only screen and (max-width: 976px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-ecebc267{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ecebc267{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background: linear-gradient(130deg, #ffffff 60%, #f8f8f8 46%);;background-clip: padding-box;}}@media only screen and (max-width: 767px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-ecebc267{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-ecebc267{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background: linear-gradient(130deg, #ffffff 60%, #f8f8f8 46%);;background-clip: padding-box;flex-wrap: wrap;}}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-8d4ac8a0 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-8d4ac8a0 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-8d4ac8a0 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-8d4ac8a0 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-8d4ac8a0 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-8d4ac8a0{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-8d4ac8a0 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: row;align-items: flex-start;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;row-gap: 32px;column-gap: 32px;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-8d4ac8a0{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;padding-top: 80px;padding-bottom: 80px;padding-left: 12px;padding-right: 12px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;row-gap: 32px;column-gap: 32px;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-047d9c4f{max-width: 25%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;max-width: 25% !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-047d9c4f{max-width: 25%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;max-width: 25% !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-047d9c4f{max-width: 25%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;max-width: 25% !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-047d9c4f{max-width: 25%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;max-width: 25% !important;}@media only screen and (max-width: 976px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-8d4ac8a0{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-8d4ac8a0 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-8d4ac8a0{padding-top: 80px;padding-bottom: 80px;padding-left: 12px;padding-right: 12px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-047d9c4f{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;max-width:  !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-047d9c4f{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;max-width:  !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-047d9c4f{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;max-width:  !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-047d9c4f{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;max-width:  !important;}}@media only screen and (max-width: 767px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-8d4ac8a0{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-8d4ac8a0 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-8d4ac8a0{padding-top: 80px;padding-bottom: 80px;padding-left: 12px;padding-right: 12px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-047d9c4f{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;flex-wrap: wrap;max-width: 100% !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-047d9c4f{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;flex-wrap: wrap;max-width: 100% !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-047d9c4f{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;flex-wrap: wrap;max-width: 100% !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-047d9c4f{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-047d9c4f{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;flex-wrap: wrap;max-width: 100% !important;}}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-f064f662.wp-block-uagb-container{color: #ffffff;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-f064f662.wp-block-uagb-container *{color: #ffffff;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-f064f662 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-f064f662 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-f064f662 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-f064f662 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-f064f662 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-f064f662{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-f064f662 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;row-gap: 20px;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-f064f662{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;padding-top: 20px;padding-bottom: 20px;padding-left: 12px;padding-right: 12px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;background-color: #25282a;;row-gap: 20px;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-dbd5f6c0 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-dbd5f6c0 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-dbd5f6c0 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-dbd5f6c0 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-dbd5f6c0 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-dbd5f6c0{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-dbd5f6c0 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: row;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;row-gap: 20px;column-gap: 32px;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-dbd5f6c0{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;flex-direction: row;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;row-gap: 20px;column-gap: 32px;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-dbd5f6c0.wp-block-uagb-container > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not( .spectra-container-link-overlay ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox):not(.wp-block-uagb-lottie):not(.uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap){width: auto !important;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-dbd5f6c0.wp-block-uagb-container > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap > *:not( .wp-block-uagb-column ):not( .wp-block-uagb-section ):not( .uagb-container__shape ):not( .uagb-container__video-wrap ):not( .uagb-slider-container ):not(.spectra-image-gallery__control-lightbox){width: auto !important;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image--layout-default figure img{box-shadow: 0px 0px 0 #00000070;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image .wp-block-uagb-image__figure figcaption{font-style: normal;align-self: center;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay figure img{box-shadow: 0px 0px 0 #00000070;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay .wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay__color-wrapper{opacity: 0.2;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay .wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay__inner{left: 15px;right: 15px;top: 15px;bottom: 15px;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay .wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay__inner .uagb-image-heading{font-style: normal;color: #fff;opacity: 1;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay .wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay__inner .uagb-image-heading a{color: #fff;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay .wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay__inner .uagb-image-caption{opacity: 0;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay .wp-block-uagb-image__figure:hover .wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay__color-wrapper{opacity: 1;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image .wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay__inner .uagb-image-separator{width: 30%;border-top-width: 2px;border-top-color: #fff;opacity: 0;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image .wp-block-uagb-image__figure img{width: 292px;height: 48px;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image .wp-block-uagb-image__figure:hover .wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay__inner .uagb-image-caption{opacity: 1;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image .wp-block-uagb-image__figure:hover .wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay__inner .uagb-image-separator{opacity: 1;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image--layout-default figure:hover img{box-shadow: 0px 0px 0 #00000070;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image--layout-overlay figure:hover img{box-shadow: 0px 0px 0 #00000070;}@media only screen and (max-width: 976px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-f064f662{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-f064f662 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-f064f662{padding-top: 20px;padding-bottom: 20px;padding-left: 12px;padding-right: 12px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-color: #25282a;;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-dbd5f6c0{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-dbd5f6c0 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-dbd5f6c0{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image .wp-block-uagb-image__figure img{width: 280px;height: 45px;}}@media only screen and (max-width: 767px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-f064f662{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-f064f662 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-f064f662{padding-top: 20px;padding-bottom: 20px;padding-left: 12px;padding-right: 12px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-color: #25282a;;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-dbd5f6c0{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-dbd5f6c0 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-dbd5f6c0{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;flex-wrap: wrap;}.uagb-block-644e4891.wp-block-uagb-image .wp-block-uagb-image__figure img{width: 280px;height: 45px;}}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-beb12949{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-beb12949 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;background-color: #006c5b;;}@media only screen and (max-width: 976px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-beb12949{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-beb12949 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-color: #006c5b;;}}@media only screen and (max-width: 767px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-beb12949{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-beb12949 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-color: #006c5b;;}}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-beb12949{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-beb12949 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;background-color: #006c5b;;}@media only screen and (max-width: 976px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-beb12949{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-beb12949 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-color: #006c5b;;}}@media only screen and (max-width: 767px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-beb12949{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-beb12949 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-beb12949{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-color: #006c5b;;}}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5096eaa1 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5096eaa1 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5096eaa1 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5096eaa1 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5096eaa1 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-5096eaa1{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-5096eaa1 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5096eaa1{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-color: inherit;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-89b3b7a8 .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-89b3b7a8 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-89b3b7a8 .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-89b3b7a8 .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-89b3b7a8 .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 1;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-89b3b7a8{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-89b3b7a8 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1320px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-direction: column;align-items: center;justify-content: center;flex-wrap: nowrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-89b3b7a8{box-shadow: 0px 0px   #00000070 ;padding-top: 2em;padding-bottom: 2em;padding-left: 2em;padding-right: 2em;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;overflow: visible;order: initial;border-top-left-radius: 30px;border-top-right-radius: 30px;border-bottom-left-radius: 30px;border-bottom-right-radius: 30px;border-color: inherit;background-color: #ebebeb;;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-97ee3d2f.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-desc-text{margin-bottom: 15px;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-97ee3d2f.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight{font-style: normal;font-weight: Default;background: #007cba;color: #fff;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-97ee3d2f.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight::-moz-selection{color: #fff;background: #007cba;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading.uagb-block-97ee3d2f.wp-block-uagb-advanced-heading .uagb-highlight::selection{color: #fff;background: #007cba;-webkit-text-fill-color: #fff;}.uagb-block-232092dc.wp-block-uagb-buttons.uagb-buttons__outer-wrap .uagb-buttons__wrap {gap: 10px;}.uagb-block-232092dc.uagb-buttons__outer-wrap .uagb-buttons__wrap {justify-content: left;align-items: center;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611.wp-block-uagb-buttons-child .uagb-buttons-repeater{background: #f3bd48;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .wp-block-button__link{background: #f3bd48;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .wp-block-button__link:hover{background: #f4deaa;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .wp-block-button__link:focus{background: #f4deaa;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-button__wrapper .uagb-buttons-repeater{color: #25282a;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .wp-block-button__link.has-text-color:hover .uagb-button__link{color: #25282a;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .wp-block-button__link.has-text-color:focus .uagb-button__link{color: #25282a;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-button__wrapper  .uagb-buttons-repeater.wp-block-button__link{box-shadow: 0px 0px 0 #00000026;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-button__wrapper  .uagb-buttons-repeater.wp-block-button__link:hover{box-shadow: 0px 0px 0 #00000026;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-buttons-repeater.wp-block-button__link{border-color: #333;border-style: none;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-buttons-repeater.wp-block-button__link:hover{border-color: #333;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-buttons-repeater.wp-block-button__link:focus{border-color: #333;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611.wp-block-button.is-style-outline .uagb-button__wrapper .wp-block-button__link.uagb-buttons-repeater{border-color: #333;border-style: none;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611.wp-block-button.is-style-outline .uagb-button__wrapper .wp-block-button__link.uagb-buttons-repeater:hover{border-color: #333;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-buttons-repeater .uagb-button__link{color: #25282a;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-buttons-repeater:hover .uagb-button__link{color: #25282a;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-buttons-repeater:focus .uagb-button__link{color: #25282a;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-buttons-repeater .uagb-button__icon > svg{width: 15px;height: 15px;fill: #25282a;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-buttons-repeater:hover .uagb-button__icon > svg{fill: #25282a;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-buttons-repeater:focus .uagb-button__icon > svg{fill: #25282a;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-buttons-repeater .uagb-button__icon-position-after{margin-left: 8px;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-buttons-repeater .uagb-button__icon-position-before{margin-right: 8px;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-button__link{text-transform: normal;text-decoration: none;}@media only screen and (max-width: 976px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-5096eaa1{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-5096eaa1 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5096eaa1{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-89b3b7a8{width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-89b3b7a8 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 1024px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-89b3b7a8{padding-top: 2px;padding-bottom: 2px;padding-left: 2px;padding-right: 2px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-color: #ebebeb;;}.uagb-block-232092dc.uagb-buttons__outer-wrap .uagb-buttons__wrap {justify-content: center;align-items: center;}.uagb-block-232092dc.uagb-buttons__outer-wrap .uagb-buttons__wrap .wp-block-button{width: auto;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611.wp-block-button.is-style-outline .uagb-button__wrapper .wp-block-button__link.uagb-buttons-repeater{border-style: none;border-color: #333;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-buttons-repeater.wp-block-button__link{border-style: none;border-color: #333;}}@media only screen and (max-width: 767px) {.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-5096eaa1{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-5096eaa1 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-5096eaa1{margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container .uagb-block-89b3b7a8{max-width: 100%;width: 100%;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-is-root-container.alignfull.uagb-block-89b3b7a8 > .uagb-container-inner-blocks-wrap{--inner-content-custom-width: min( 100%, 767px);max-width: var(--inner-content-custom-width);width: 100%;flex-wrap: wrap;}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-89b3b7a8{padding-top: 2px;padding-bottom: 2px;padding-left: 2px;padding-right: 2px;margin-top:  !important;margin-bottom:  !important;order: initial;background-color: #ebebeb;;}.uagb-block-232092dc.uagb-buttons__outer-wrap .uagb-buttons__wrap {justify-content: center;align-items: center;}.uagb-block-232092dc.uagb-buttons__outer-wrap .uagb-buttons__wrap .wp-block-button{width: auto;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611.wp-block-button.is-style-outline .uagb-button__wrapper .wp-block-button__link.uagb-buttons-repeater{border-style: none;border-color: #333;}.wp-block-uagb-buttons .uagb-block-00708611 .uagb-buttons-repeater.wp-block-button__link{border-style: none;border-color: #333;}}\";s:2:\"js\";s:161:\"document.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\", function(){ window.addEventListener( 'load', function() {\n\tUAGBButtonChild.init( '.uagb-block-00708611' );\n});\n });\";s:18:\"current_block_list\";a:17:{i:0;s:14:\"uagb\/container\";i:1;s:12:\"core\/heading\";i:2;s:9:\"core\/html\";i:3;s:10:\"core\/group\";i:6;s:21:\"uagb\/advanced-heading\";i:7;s:14:\"uagb\/separator\";i:8;s:14:\"uagb\/icon-list\";i:9;s:20:\"uagb\/icon-list-child\";i:10;s:11:\"core\/search\";i:13;s:18:\"core\/legacy-widget\";i:16;s:10:\"uagb\/image\";i:17;s:17:\"core\/social-links\";i:18;s:16:\"core\/social-link\";i:19;s:14:\"core\/paragraph\";i:20;s:30:\"meta-box\/fl-conditional-blocks\";i:21;s:12:\"uagb\/buttons\";i:22;s:18:\"uagb\/buttons-child\";}s:8:\"uag_flag\";b:1;s:11:\"uag_version\";i:1776535419;s:6:\"gfonts\";a:1:{s:7:\"Default\";a:2:{s:10:\"fontfamily\";s:7:\"Default\";s:12:\"fontvariants\";a:0:{}}}s:10:\"gfonts_url\";s:71:\"\/\/fonts.googleapis.com\/css?family=Default&subset=latin&display=fallback\";s:12:\"gfonts_files\";a:0:{}s:14:\"uag_faq_layout\";b:0;}"]},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/06\/image-scaled.jpg",1024,1024,true]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"Margaret","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/margaret-coylefamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"Dealing with the aftermath of sexual abuse? Mary DeMuth shares her story from shame to joy, proving lasting peace after trauma is possible.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"\n<p>Learn more about Mary:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Connect with Mary Demuth and catch more of their thoughts at <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marydemuth.com\/\">marydemuth.com<\/a>, and on <a href=\"http:\/\/instagram.com\/marydemuth\">Instagram,<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/AuthorMaryDeMuth\/\">Facebook<\/a> and <a href=\"http:\/\/twitter.com\/marydemuth\">X<\/a> @marydemuth<\/li>\n<li>And grab Mary Demuth\u2019s book, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.marydemuth.com\/books\/not-marked-finding-hope-healing-sexual-abuse\/\">Not Marked: Finding Hope and Healing After Sexual Abuse<\/a> on her site.<\/li>\n<li>Intrigued by today\u2019s episode? Think deeper about Overcoming Abuse by listening to <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/how-god-turned-my-mess-into-his-message-noe-garcia\/\">How God Turned my Mess into His Message<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li>Want to <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/guest\/mary-demuth\/\">hear more episodes by Mary DeMuth, listen here<\/a>!\u00a0<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<hr>\n<p>FamilyLife Links:\u00a0<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/donate.familylife.com\/may-2024\/?cru_source=D0002405RB&cru_medium=RadioBanner&cru_premium=PRE21802&cru_campaign=May2024&utm_source=web&utm_medium=radiobanner&utm_campaign=may2024\">Double your gift this month<\/a> when you give to FamilyLife!<\/li>\n<li>Find resources from this podcast at <a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/radio-resources\/\">shop.familylife.com<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/shop.familylife.com\/product-category\/past-radio-resources\/\">See resources from our past podcasts.<\/a><\/li>\n<li>Find more content and resources on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/app\/\">FamilyLife's app<\/a>!<\/li>\n<li>Help others find FamilyLife. Leave a review on <a href=\"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303\">Apple Podcast<\/a> or <a href=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm?si=d6dfa8d2415f4750\">Spotify<\/a>.<\/li>\n<li>Check out all the FamilyLife's podcasts on the <a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/familylife-podcast-network\/\">FamilyLife Podcast Network<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/fl2024-05-16.pdf","transcript_content":"\nFamilyLife Today\u00ae National Radio Version (time edited) Transcript\r\n\r\nReferences to conferences, resources, or other special promotions may be obsolete.\r\n\r\nHealing from Sexual Abuse: My Story\r\n\r\nGuest:Mary DeMuth\r\n\r\nFrom the series:Healing from Sexual Abuse: My Story (Day 1 of 2)\r\n\r\nAir date:May 16, 2024\r\n\r\nShelby: Hey, Shelby Abbott here. I just want to give a heads up before you listen to this next program. Today\u2019s conversation on FamilyLife Today covers some sensitive, but important, subjects that might not be suitable for younger ears. Please use discretion when listening to this next broadcast. Alright, now, let\u2019s jump into it.\r\n\r\nMary: All that horrible stuff happened under evergreen trees. I go outside, and I sit my back against a hemlock tree. I look up, and I say to the Lord, \u201cWould You just be the Daddy who will never leave me?\u201d I didn\u2019t come to the Lord out of the sense of my own sinfulness\u2014of course, that would come\u2014but I just had this desperate hole of needing a dad. That began the many, many, many-year journey of walking out: \u201cWhat does healing look like?\u201d\r\n\r\nShelby: Welcome to FamilyLife Today, where we want to help you pursue the relationships that matter most. I\u2019m Shelby Abbott, and your hosts are Dave and Ann Wilson. You can find us at FamilyLifeToday.com.\r\n\r\nAnn: This is FamilyLife Today.\r\n\r\nDave: I just read somewhere that this author said, \u201cWhen you tell your story, it helps you heal.\u201d Do you feel like telling your abuse story helped you heal?\r\n\r\nAnn: I read that same quote, and I\u2014\r\n\r\nDave: \u2014yes, she might be in the studio with us today. [Laughter]\r\n\r\nAnn: I was resonating with that. I would have never guessed it, because of my own abuse. What you want to do is hide the story, hide yourself, hide everything. You think the last thing you ever want to do is tell your story; but there is something about telling your story that brings healing.\r\n\r\nDave: Yes. So, where are we going today?\r\n\r\nAnn: Mary DeMuth is back with us today.\r\n\r\nMary: Yay!\r\n\r\nAnn: Mary, I\u2019m so glad you\u2019re back. And you\u2019re brave! You\u2019re brave because you enter into areas that not all of us are willing to go into, especially when it comes to our past. You\u2019ve been talking about this for a while. It\u2019s been on your heart [and] on your mind, for healing for those who have been abused. \r\n\r\nShould we go back and retell Mary\u2019s story?\r\n\r\nDave: Yes, I\u2019d love to hear your story. \r\n\r\nA lot of people know you\u2019re an author. I didn\u2019t know this\u2014I\u2019m looking at two books in front of me. One says you wrote 16 books; the other says you wrote 40.\r\n\r\nMary: Now it\u2019s 50.\r\n\r\nDave: What?! [Laughter]\r\n\r\nMary: Yes! 50.\r\n\r\nAnn: Fifty?!\r\n\r\nDave: Really? \r\n\r\nMary: Yes. [Laughter] Crazy, huh?\r\n\r\nDave: Is that right?\r\n\r\nMary: Yes.\r\n\r\nDave: So, there\u2019s been a\u2014\r\n\r\nAnn: \u2014I\u2019m going to bring a trophy the next time you\u2019re in here. [Laughter]\r\n\r\nDave: There are 30-something books\u2014\r\n\r\nAnn: \u2014that\u2019s incredible.\r\n\r\nDave: \u2014after this book? What year did this come out: Not Marked?\r\n\r\nMary: 2013? 2013.\r\n\r\nDave: Wow! You\u2019re one busy writer.\r\n\r\nMary: Yes, I write about three books a year. That makes sense, yes.\r\n\r\nAnn: Three books a year?\r\n\r\nMary: Yes.\r\n\r\nDave: We write about three every ten years! [Laughter] Something like that.\r\n\r\nAnn: Mary, do you know\u2014what are the statistics in terms of who has been abused (the amount): one in what? How many now? Do you know?\r\n\r\nMary: It\u2019s so hard to quantify, but it\u2019s usually said, about six-ish out of ten-ish for women, and three-ish out of ten-ish [for men]. The problem with that is so many people, like what you just said, don\u2019t report.\r\n\r\nAnn: Right.\r\n\r\nMary: And also, we don\u2019t have a very robust view of the definition of sexual abuse. \r\n\r\nThe truth is that, in healing from it, the journey is very similar for [the] creepy uncle [who] puts his hand on your leg, versus the whole full-out problem that could happen. Those people who have had the creepy uncle are not reporting that; and so, a lot of us\u2014many people; almost all\u2014have had some sort of sexual contact that was unwanted. \r\n\r\nAnn: With my story, I didn\u2019t know what sexual abuse was. It wasn\u2019t until I read Dan Allender\u2019s, The Wounded Heart, that I remember saying, \u201cThat is sexual abuse.\u201d Then, that took me into a journey. But I\u2019m thinking you\u2019re right. There are a lot of people who would have no idea that: \u201cThat is sexual abuse.\u201d\r\n\r\nMary: Right. Hence, the under-reporting, plus all the shame associated with it. \r\n\r\nI think, too, even if you look at that in the workplace\u2014harassment. That\u2019s also a form of sexual abuse. I think it is rampant, and I think that\u2019s why it was so bewildering to me in the \u201890s\u2014way back in the olden days of yore [Laughter]\u2014when I would go and teach on this, and I would freak out all the nice coordinators in the back of the room. They\u2019re like, \u201cYou can\u2019t talk about that here.\u201d I could see their eyes get really wide.\r\n\r\nAnn: Where were you teaching?\r\n\r\nMary: Just in Texas\u2014no, this was in Washington state\u2014and I would teach at churches. But then, afterwards, there would be this group\u2014a line of women\u201475 years old, saying, \u201cI\u2019ve never told a soul,\u201d and weeping and just letting it out for the first time. I [thought], \u201cI don\u2019t care if the people don\u2019t like that I talk about this.\u201d I felt like the Lord was calling me to be a pioneer\u2014to go first, so that other people wouldn\u2019t feel alone, because I felt so alone in my story.\r\n\r\nAnn: Me, too, because it\u2019s not something that people\u2014especially, back in the day\u2014were sharing openly. Way to be a pioneer in this area. Thank you!\r\n\r\nDave: I know that, when we speak at the FamilyLife\u00ae Weekend to Remember marriage getaways, Ann will share her story. There\u2019s a Sunday morning, where we split up the husbands [and wives]. After that talk, we come back together, and she\u2019s gone. I can\u2019t even find her, because there\u2019s a line. They\u2019re lining up to talk about her sharing that part of her story. \r\n\r\nAnn: And it was back in the \u201890s when I started sharing that. People weren\u2019t talking about it back then. I was shocked that they would want to talk about it so openly, and happy that they were willing to confess what had happened.\r\n\r\nMary: Yes, yes.\r\n\r\nDave: Give us a little bit of your story so our listeners who haven\u2019t heard you in the past know what we\u2019re talking about; and then, let\u2019s talk about healing.\r\n\r\nMary: I grew up in a pretty scary home, very unprotected. For the first couple of years of my life, I was with my grandparents\u2014which I have a couple of memories of\u2014and then, I went back to live my mom and a man she met at a laundromat who became her husband. This was the \u201860s, so they exchanged flowers instead of rings and all of that.\r\n\r\nI am now five years old. I go to a lady\u2019s house after school because it was half-day kindergarten in those days. Her name was Eva. I affectionately\u2014I guess affectionately is the wrong word\u2014called her Eva, the chain-smoking babysitter. [Laughter] The one thing you need to know about her is that she hated children. Right away, these boys\u2014whom I later find out were next door\u2014knocked on the door of her house. They said, \u201cCan Mary come out and play?\u201d \r\n\r\nFive years old, this began a year-long sexual abuse. It was horrendous.\r\n\r\nDave: How old were these boys?\r\n\r\nMary: They were in their teens, so they were probably 16-18 years old. They were bigger than me.\r\n\r\nAnn: And the babysitter didn\u2019t think, \u201cThis is something\u2014\u201d\r\n\r\nMary: She knew. She knew.\r\n\r\nAnn: She knew?\r\n\r\nMary: She knew.\r\n\r\nAnn: Even from the beginning?\r\n\r\nMary: I\u2019m sure she knew. It\u2019s evil. I mean, there\u2019s really no other word about it.\r\n\r\nAnn: It\u2019s weird that a 16-year-old boy would want to hang out with a 5-year-old girl.\r\n\r\nMary: Right, but if you hate children\u2014\r\n\r\nAnn: \u2014ohhh-\r\n\r\nMary: \u2014and they would take the child off of your hands. \r\n\r\nDuring all this time, I didn\u2019t know anything. I did know it was wrong. That was a gift that the Lord gave me at that time. I wasn\u2019t a Christian, but I knew what they were doing was wrong, and that they were at fault, which is a huge gift, because most sexual abuse victims internalize that guilt. The guilt belongs to the perpetrator, not the victim; but a lot of times, victims will hold that. \r\n\r\nThey would use a bad word to describe what they were doing. They also told me that, if I told my parents, they would kill them. I was terrified. First of all, I was a good little girl. I didn\u2019t want to say that bad word. Second of all, I didn\u2019t want to be responsible for their demise. \r\n\r\nI was a pretty sophisticated five-year-old. I had all these thoughts about all of this. Finally, about three quarters of the way through the year, I decided that the safest person to tell was Eva, the chain-smoking babysitter. She said these five words to me. She said, \u201cI will tell your mom!\u201d And I believed her. So, the next day, I thought, \u201cI\u2019m set free!\u201d And the knock came at the door. That evil woman pushed me back out. \r\n\r\nAt that point, I was like, \u201cOkay, parents don\u2019t care,\u201d because I thought she told them. \u201cSo, I am going to have to protect myself.\u201d I learned how to sleep. I would come home from half-day kindergarten. I would eat my peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I would run to Eva, the chain-smoking babysitter\u2019s bed, pull the covers over my head and pretend to sleep for the whole afternoon. That did save me, because at least I was out of her\u2014I figured out her formula; I just needed to be out of her hair.\r\n\r\nAnd then, we moved at the end of that year.\r\n\r\nAnn: I just have to say\u2014\r\n\r\nMary: \u2014I know you\u2019re already tearing up. I\u2019m so sorry. \r\n\r\nAnn: \u2014just imagining\u2014first of all, you\u2019re a smart little girl to figure out how to get out of this; but I\u2019m imagining\u2014this little Mary, hiding in the bed, with the covers over your head to protect yourself. [Emotion in voice] It\u2019s the saddest thing ever!\r\n\r\nMary: It\u2019s so sad.\r\n\r\nDave: I\u2019ll throw this in, from a guy\u2019s perspective, as Ann\u2019s husband; do you two ever experience\u2014when I hear that, I get angry\u2014[anger].\r\n\r\nAnn: When I was reading Mary\u2019s story through the book, I was like, \u201cThis is so wrong! Where\u2019s the justice?!\u201d\r\n\r\nDave: Did you experience that part? Or is that later or never?\r\n\r\nMary: I was too traumatized at the time. \r\n\r\nDave: Yes.\r\n\r\nMary: But interestingly enough\u2014yes, of course, [I was] very angry\u2014but I was more angry at other people. I was more angry at my mom for not protecting me; I was angry at my biological father, who was also a sexual predator, and was grooming me to be his next victim before he took his life.\r\n\r\nAnn: Ugh!\r\n\r\nMary: But there was plenty of sexual abuse that happened from him to me. My biological father was doing that as well. There was a lot of anger. I\u2019m still mad at him, to be super honest.\r\n\r\nDave: I love this: \u201cchain-smoking babysitter\u201d\u2014[Laughter]\u2014you found out she never told your mom? Or did she tell her later? \r\n\r\nAnn: Yes, keep going in your story.\r\n\r\nMary: She didn\u2019t, but I lived with the belief that she had for ten years.\r\n\r\nDave: Ten years.\r\n\r\nAnn: You\u2019re wondering, \u201cWhy isn\u2019t my mom rescuing me?\u201d\r\n\r\nMary: Yes, exactly! And the other thing that happened to me\u2014and it\u2019s why the title of the book is Not Marked\u2014is that I felt like I had this \u201cCome get me\u201d sign on my forehead, like I had been marked by these predators. \r\n\r\nI had several different instances throughout my life where I, thankfully, was a runner; and I would run away from any of those endless\u2014thankfully, able to escape several different times of predatory teenage boys or men, who were trying to do that, again, to me. I thought, \u201cWhat in the heck is wrong with me? Do I have some sort of honing beacon?\u201d  \r\n\r\n[Since] I had been so traumatized [and] so neglected, I had to learn, later in life, that I had to heal from those wounds, or I would continue to be preyed on. I realized that I had to settle that worth with the Lord; otherwise, I kept repeating those patterns. Even in female friendships, I would [think], \u201cWhy do I keep coming to these narcissistic folks?\u201d I found out I was constantly attracted to narcissistic predators, because I was trying to complete a circle of the story: \u201cIf I can get a narcissistic predator to love me, I can prove I\u2019m finally loveable to my parents.\u201d \r\n\r\nBut then, I realized: \u201cNo, I have to prove I\u2019m loveable to the One who created me.\u201d When I settled that, I stopped trying to complete that story in an unhealthy way. I hope that makes sense.\r\n\r\nAnn: Yes.\r\n\r\nDave: It makes sense, but I want you to explain it more. [Laughter] What do you mean you had to understand you are loved by your Creator?\r\n\r\nAnn: Bring Jesus into the picture. What happened there?\r\n\r\nMary: Right. We had my father die when I was ten; my mother remarried again, and so, I had three fathers by that time. We moved several different times. And then, the seventh and eighth grade years were years of suicidal ideation, because I would look at the ground, and my feet standing on the ground, and say, \u201cWhy am I here except to be neglected or abused?\u201d\r\n\r\nDuring this time, my mom was never home; my stepdad was working a graveyard [shift]. I was an only child, and I was living on a farm with seven horses. I would come home from school, and I would be completely alone until ten o\u2019clock at night. I learned how to cook, which is\u2014I\u2019m a good cook now\u2014\r\n\r\nAnn: \u2014this is like the most tragic story!\r\n\r\nMary: I know it is. It\u2019s getting better, I promise! I\u2019m going to meet Jesus. I promise!\r\n\r\nAnn: I\u2019m telling you, though, it shows God\u2019s grace and redemption. \r\n\r\nLet me ask you, Mary, because I\u2019ve recently done this\u2014I had somebody ask me the question: \u201cPicture your life, growing up, and the things that you went through. Could you see places where God was wooing you? [Where]He was showing you?\u201d \r\n\r\nI went back into those days of abuse. I remember, some abuse had just happened; I remember being outside. I was four or five years old. I saw a tree in the spring, heavy-laden, with these flowers. I can remember pulling the limb down, and it was so low. These gorgeous pink\u2014it was probably a flowering crab [with] pink fragrant flowers\u2014and I remember smelling them. It filled my heart with this happiness. That\u2019s what came to my mind when somebody said, \u201cDo you have recollection of God wooing you? Of saying, \u2018I see you\u2019?\u201d \r\n\r\nHave you ever thought through that?\r\n\r\nMary: Yes, definitely. For me, a lot of that abuse happened at the root of an evergreen tree. I think, in some ways, the Lord has created the human body in such a way that protects us. I did disassociate and fly up to the top of those trees. That disassociation was a gift; but I also\u2014little things\u2014, like all the music I was attracted to, as a child and then as a young adult, had Christian themes to them.\r\n\r\nAnn: Really?\r\n\r\nMary: When I was in the sixth grade, my grandmother, who never went to church, said, \u201cYou need to get baptized.\u201d They took me to this church. The requirement was that you had to go to one Sunday school class. I [went] to one Sunday school class. We made Jericho out of these cardboard bricks and kicked them over in the name of Jesus. [Laughter] I [said], \u201cI want to go back.\u201d My mom said, \u201cNo, you\u2019re not going back.\u201d This is where I am\u2014at seventh and eighth grade, to get back to the story\u2014suicidal ideation; writing suicide poetry. \r\n\r\nAnd here\u2019s what I want to say to those of you who are in children\u2019s lives: there was a counselor who saw where I was, and I believe he was a Christ-follower. He allowed me to come into his office at any moment. I was this little girl, who was this total straight-A student, but I would cry in the middle of class; because at this point, my mom\u2019s third marriage was breaking up. That man, I had kind of attached myself to. He was going to be leaving\u2014and I was going to lose everything. So, he [the counselor] was there for me that year. I see the hand of God in that.\r\n\r\nAnd then, the next year\u2014my ninth grade year, a friend of mine invited me to Young Life. She said, \u201cIt\u2019s really fun. There are cute guys there.\u201d [Laughter] I said, \u201cOkay, cool.\u201d [Laughter] But after all the fun, and the shaving cream, and singing songs, someone would stand up, and they would talk about Jesus. Every time I heard the name of Jesus, my heart would just pound out of my chest. That whole year, I would hear about Jesus. \r\n\r\nAnd then, my sophomore year, I went to a weekend retreat where they gave the whole gospel. What is so poignant about what scholars call inclusio, when you have something that starts here and ends here\u2014you also see it in the Genesis narrative, and you also see it in the book of Ruth; or chiasm: you start at the same place you finish. \r\n\r\nAll that horrible stuff happened under evergreen trees. I go outside, and I sit my back against a hemlock tree in the Seattle area. I look up, and I say to the Lord, \u201cWould You just be the Daddy who will never leave me?\u201d I didn\u2019t come to the Lord out of the sense of my own sinfulness\u2014of course, that would come\u2014but I had this desperate hole of needing a dad. I like to tell audiences, \u201cAnd then, I was completely healed, and everything was fine.\u201d [Laughter]\r\n\r\nAnn: Wouldn\u2019t that be nice?! [Laughter]\r\n\r\nMary: But that began the many, many, many-year journey of walking out: \u201cWhat does healing look like?\u201d Some of that is: \u201cHow can marriage be a place of healing for a sexual-abuse victim?\u201d How we\u2014my husband wrote in this book as well\u2014how we, together, worked this very traumatic issue.\r\n\r\nAnn: Can you give us a taste. Let\u2019s start walking into that, and we\u2019ll continue it into tomorrow; but give us a taste of what that started like, how that healing journey started with your husband.\r\n\r\nMary: Well,\u2014Dave: \u2014or even before your husband.\r\n\r\nMary: Yes!\r\n\r\nAnn: Yes, yes.\r\n\r\nMary: I\u2019ll back up slightly. I cried a lot, because I just loved Jesus\u2014and people loved me\u2014these Young Life leaders would love me; it was very powerful. When I got to college, I found a group of friends that actually believed that God healed people. They prayed for me for four years, and I wept. \r\n\r\nWhen I finished college, I was thinking, \u201cOh, good! I\u2019m done with that.\u201d [Noise as if checking things off a list] When I got married, we had the conversation. I didn\u2019t withhold it from him, but I had told him, \u201cBut that\u2019s in the past, and God\u2019s healed me of that.\u201d Hahaha! \r\n\r\nAnn: This was our [Ann with Dave] conversation: \u201cI\u2019m good now, because I know Jesus.\u201d\r\n\r\nMary: \u201cJesus healed me.\u201d \r\n\r\nI did a lot of pressing down of that story, and when all these triggers and things would come up, I would have these frustrating evangelical voices in my head that said, \u201cYou have to be all sexy for your husband.\u201d I was paralyzed by it. And then, constantly felt guilty that I wasn\u2019t fulfilling my duties. \r\n\r\nThat will\u2014I think, when we talk tomorrow, I\u2019ll tell why I wrote this book, which goes back to that story; it was excruciating. I cannot tell you how excruciating it was for me to talk about sex with my husband. It felt like I wanted to barf; it was just so hard, because I could not see it as beautiful. I could not see it\u2014we\u2019d gone to a FamilyLife\u00ae marriage conference, [but] I couldn\u2019t see it as the gift God gives spouses. I could only see it as trauma. \r\n\r\nFor me to bring it up felt like I was really broken, really damaged. He had to suffer the consequences. Talk about being mad! He was mad at those boys, too, because they stole something from me that caused me to really not engage in the act of marriage. I just did what I did naturally; I flew up into the tree limbs, and I watched everything happen, but I couldn\u2019t put my body there, because I was still too traumatized, and I was so little trauma-informed that I didn\u2019t know what was going on with me. \r\n\r\nWe weren\u2019t talking about that at that time in the \u201890s. I just didn\u2019t know, so I was constantly feeling defeated, like I was failing my husband. I also was completely shaky, and freaked out, and trying to pull myself up by my bootstraps. Now, I wish I could go back and see what the Lord was seeing there. I know He just wanted to hold me through all of that, but I was just broken.\r\n\r\nAnn: What would you do differently, knowing what you know now? And I\u2019m thinking of a listener who\u2019s saying, \u201cI\u2019m going through that right now. I haven\u2019t really dealt with it; I\u2019m feeling those same things. I just disassociate when it comes to any kind of physical intimacy.\u201d What would you say to her?\r\n\r\nMary: First, \u201can untold story never heals.\u201d She needs (or he needs) to pour out that story. Sometimes, people cannot do it verbally. So, write it down and slide it across to a safe person; that person needs to be safe. Find a safe person, and let them read it first if you can\u2019t say it out loud. Get it out first.\r\n\r\nBut the second is trauma-informed counseling, and especially someone who deals in sexual abuse. And even if you could go further, [someone who understands] sexual abuse and then, who\u2019s a marriage expert, because it\u2019s just such a complicated thing. It is the best gift that you\u2019ll give that part of your marriage, for sure.\r\n\r\nBut we were poor. I mean, I wanted counseling, but we just had no\u2014\r\n\r\nAnn: \u2014and counseling wasn\u2019t a thing, back then, the way it is now.\r\n\r\nMary: No! I actually wanted it, but we just didn\u2019t\u2014I was a stay-at-home mom; we had no money. And the first time I was finally able to get counseling was when my husband was in seminary. They said that wives could go to counseling [with] the people training to be counselors for free. I was like, \u201cFinally!\u201d I began that journey then.\r\n\r\nDave: You were really not talking to anybody, except your husband\u2014\r\n\r\nMary: \u2014correct; yes.\r\n\r\nDave: \u2014for a while.\r\n\r\nMary: A couple of friends knew as well. Again, they didn\u2019t necessarily have my\u2014I had a pretty traumatic story, so they didn\u2019t know how to counsel me. He didn\u2019t have that story; he didn\u2019t know how to counsel me. And then, you\u2019re dealing with the hurt and pain he was experiencing, which I just couldn\u2019t carry; because I was carrying so much of my own. The transition began to happen later. We kind of muddled our way through. We\u2019ll talk about that in the next episode. \r\n\r\nAnn: I think that\u2019s, too, why your book is so powerful\u2014to have your husband\u2019s voice in it as well, to say: \u201cThis is what it was like,\u201d and \u201cThis is what you can do.\u201d\r\n\r\nShelby: I\u2019m Shelby Abbott, and you\u2019ve been listening to Dave and Ann Wilson with Mary DeMuth on FamilyLife Today. You know, this topic is always so complex and can even be difficult to even approach. I\u2019m so glad Mary was with us today to be honest about sexual abuse and its effect on our lives. I, personally, am a sexual-abuse survivor. Hearing her talk about it is something that will, no doubt, be part of the healing process, not only for me, but for you, too, if this is your story. \r\n\r\nMary has written a book called Not Marked: Finding Hope &amp;amp; Healing After Sexual Abuse. Not only is this her story, but it offers some added perspective from Mary\u2019s husband, Patrick, to support any spouses who want to foster healing and strengthen their relationship with their spouse if they\u2019ve gone through something traumatic like this. \r\n\r\nYou can get your copy of Mary\u2019s book, Not Marked, right now by going online to FamilyLifeToday.com to request your copy there. Or you can give us a call at 800-358-6329; again, that number is 800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\r\n\r\nThis topic is, obviously, difficult. And it\u2019s a part of families everywhere. That\u2019s one of the reasons why we, at FamilyLife, are so passionate about helping to reach marriages and families. It hits you right at home, and we want to be part of the solution in your life. One of the ways we\u2019re able to do that is we have partners who come alongside us, give monthly, and help support the ministry of FamilyLife. \r\n\r\nIf you want to be a part of the solution, and join us in this ministry, we\u2019d love it if you\u2019d become a monthly partner. The cool thing is, all this month\u2014in the month of May, every donation that you give will be matched dollar-for-dollar, up to $550,000. You can learn a little more about the details by going online to FamilyLifeToday.com and clicking on the \u201cDonate Now\u201d button at the top of the page. Or, again, you can give us a call at the number: 800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \r\n\r\nNow, tomorrow, Mary DeMuth is back with the Wilsons to talk about how past trauma impacts your marriage. She\u2019s going to talk about discovering healing and getting some advice from abuse survivors. That\u2019s coming up tomorrow; we hope you\u2019ll join us. \r\n\r\nOn behalf of Dave and Ann Wilson, I\u2019m Shelby Abbott. We will see you back next time for another edition of FamilyLife Today. \r\n\r\nFamilyLife Today is a donor-supported production of FamilyLife, a Cru\u00ae Ministry. \r\n\r\nHelping you pursue the relationships that matter most.\r\n\r\nWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider donating today to help defray the costs?  \r\n\r\nCopyright \u00a9 2024 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\r\n\r\nwww.FamilyLife                                 \r\n\r\n\n","theme_header_position":"Sticky","post_header_is_sticky":"default","is_header_overlay":"0"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/308507","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/47000"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=308507"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/280865"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=308507"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=308507"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=308507"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=308507"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=308507"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=308507"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}