{"id":307441,"date":"2022-03-19T08:02:09","date_gmt":"2022-03-19T12:02:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/love-for-a-lifetime-2\/"},"modified":"2022-03-19T08:02:09","modified_gmt":"2022-03-19T12:02:09","slug":"love-for-a-lifetime-2","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-this-week\/love-for-a-lifetime-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Love for a Lifetime"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Marriage was intended to be a lifetime covenant. Be inspired and encouraged in your marriage commitment from guests Gary Thomas, Laura Story, and Voddie Baucham.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/d2c17sq0nj1f7e.cloudfront.net\/flw2022-03-19.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:27:11","filesize":"24.89M","filesize_raw":"26097338","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"podcast_series":[],"cwp_profile":[3158,8913,8805],"series":[10388],"class_list":["post-307441","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","hentry","category-uncategorized","cwp_profile-gary-thomas","cwp_profile-laura-story","cwp_profile-voddie-baucham","series-familylife-this-week"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":false,"episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/10\/FLTW-Podcast-Cover-2-1400x1400-1-300x300-1.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/dts.podtrac.com\/redirect.mp3\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/307441\/love-for-a-lifetime-2","player_link":"https:\/\/dts.podtrac.com\/redirect.mp3\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/307441\/love-for-a-lifetime-2","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-this-week","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"1LmNFfmOrX\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-this-week\/love-for-a-lifetime-2\/\">Love for a Lifetime<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-this-week\/love-for-a-lifetime-2\/embed\/#?secret=1LmNFfmOrX\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Love for a Lifetime&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"1LmNFfmOrX\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/flw\/flw2022-03-19.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/d2c17sq0nj1f7e.cloudfront.net\/flw2022-03-19.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle:<\/strong> Everyday struggles are normal in marriage; maybe he forgot to take the trash out, or she didn\u2019t have the meal ready on time. But for some of you, it\u2019s not about the trash or the meal; it\u2019s something more serious. Here\u2019s Laura Story.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Disability really is very tough on a marriage. Anyone that has been through that, even if it\u2019s a short-term thing, knows that it\u2019s just hard! For a while, we really saw it as being: \u201cThat\u2019s the problem in our marriage.\u201d For me, I guess, it was a couple of years ago when I realized that Martin\u2019s disability isn\u2019t the problem in our marriage; our sin is the problem in our marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle:<\/strong> You know, life is tough; and when you put two sinners together in marriage, it\u2019s even tougher. Today, we\u2019re going to give you some tips on going the distance in your marriage. Stay tuned to <em>FamilyLife This Week<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWelcome to <em>FamilyLife This Week<\/em>. I'm Michelle Hill. A [few] years ago, I went on a cruise. Now, before you say, \u201cOhhh!\u201d I worked the entire time; and I came back, pasty-white, because I was underneath the deck the entire time! It\u2019s because I\u2019m single, and I went on a FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup><em>Love Like You Mean It<\/em><sup>\u00ae <\/sup><em>marriage<\/em> cruise; so can I get a collective, \u201cAww\u201d [crowd voices]? Thank you; thank you! That\u2019s what I needed. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, the one thing I was surprised by was the number of couples who attended the <em>Love Like You Mean It<\/em> marriage cruise, year, after year, after year. Now, of course, the warm weather, and the sun, and the time away was all part of it; but a big part for <em>many<\/em> was building into their marriage, because they want their marriage to go the distance.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tToday, I\u2019m going to take you on a cruise or, at least, let you hear a little bit of what the folks on the boat heard. You see, this is really <em>good stuff<\/em>! This is solid, biblical content that encouraged <em>them<\/em>; so I\u2019m hoping it will encourage <em>you<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the speakers that folks get to hear regularly is Gary Thomas. Gary is an international speaker and best-selling author. In fact, you might recognize a couple of his books: <em>Sacred Marriage, Authentic Faith. <\/em>He and his wife live in Houston, Texas, with their three kids. He has run the Boston Marathon three times, so it\u2019s safe to say that he\u2019s an avid runner. Well, Gary shared a story about a pastor friend of his. This friend really gets the idea of his vows, \u201c\u2026\u2019til death do us part.\u201d Here\u2019s Gary. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous <em>Love Like You Mean It <\/em>Message]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Gary:<\/strong> A friend of mine was a pastor up in Canada\u2014a really young man\u2014just one of the most gifted communicators I\u2019ve ever known. Things were going so well, but he was in just one of those really awful church fights\u2014and ended up in a church split\u2014and he was out of a job. It was one of those nasty ones, where there\u2019s a lot of gossip and slander; and people have to be blamed. People were saying <em>awful<\/em> things about him; and he\u2019s a good man with a good heart, but his reputation was just kind of wrecked!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe found himself in a job, crawling under houses for $8 an hour. He had this great vision that God was going to use him and bless his ministry, and it\u2019s just humiliating that he can barely eke out a living. His wife is having to budget, you know, on a third of what they were living on before. She could have gotten down on him; but she said: \u201cHoney, I believe in you. I know God has a plan for you. This is a momentary reprieve.\u201d She <em>never <\/em>lost her faith in him, even with people saying ugly things about him. She was there for him the <em>entire time<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne time, Grant came home; and he was so discouraged. He was dirty, and smelly, and filthy, and made\u2014you know what?\u2014I don\u2019t know\u201470 bucks that day. He walks in the house, and his wife hadn\u2019t heard him walk in; but he hears his wife talking on the phone. He overhears her telling one of the elders in the church: \u201cNo, you <em>can\u2019t<\/em> talk to my husband. I\u2019m his wife; and I just want you to know, if you want to get to him, you have to go through me. And if you find a way to get around me, you\u2019re going to have to deal with me; because he\u2019s my husband, and you\u2019re not going to abuse him anymore!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGrant felt so humbled\u2014that when she could have piled on\u2014she could have, maybe, even said, \u201cYou know, maybe what they\u2019re saying is true,\u201d\u2014but she was there for him! She said, \u201cI was born to get you through this.\u201d And they grew together, and he grew as a believer. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGot put them in a church in the United States\u2014he\u2019s in Bellingham, Washington\u2014and today, his church is the largest church for a city that size in the United States. It has just blossomed, and God has blessed his ministry. [Applause] I was talking to one of his elders a decade ago, and they were telling me: \u201cWe know we\u2019re going to lose him; he\u2019s too gifted. He could be paid three times what we pay him. He would be in a city that\u2019s larger, where people could grow; it\u2019s hard to grow a church when you kind of push the boundaries of the population.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI know\/I thought why Grant hadn\u2019t taken up any of those offers, because he was getting regular contacts. I called him just a year or two ago, when I was working on <em>A Life-Long Love<\/em>. I said: \u201cHey, Grant! Just between you and me\u2014I won\u2019t tell anybody! I just need to know, between you and me\u201d\u2014[Laughter]\u2014you see, Grant\u2019s wife, Laurel, the one who protected him, has been going steadily blind until, now, she is almost completely blind. They\u2019re in the small community of Linden, Washington, where she knows their house; she knows the community. Everything is set up for her. I said, \u201cI\u2019m guessing that the primary reason you\u2019re still in Bellingham is it\u2019s really the best place for Laurel to live.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGrant was silent for a long while; and he said, \u201cI can\u2019t deny that.\u201d I love it\u2014where she said, when he was down\u2014\u201cI was born for this!\u201d His wife is down; he says: \u201cI was born for this! Before I was born to be some big-shot pastor, I was born to be my wife\u2019s husband. I\u2019m not going to resent it that I\u2019m stuck here in this town.\u201d He doesn\u2019t look at it that way! \u201cI\u2019m not going to resent it that I can\u2019t follow these opportunities, because the best opportunity in my life is to be connected to my wife\/to be a husband. A lot of men with big churches live with empty souls, because they have distant marriages.\u201d Grant said, \u201cI think it\u2019s better to have a pretty large church and a connected marriage and to be honoring her.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThese are <em>tough<\/em> things; but you have to ask yourself: \u201cWhat do you want? What do you want out of your marriage?\u201d \u201cDo you want to just co-exist? Do you want to just get by, and maybe just reduce the level of conflict?\u201d or \u201cDo you really want to be <em>connected<\/em> as a couple?\u201d \u201cWhat do you want out of your marriage?\u201d So often, it\u2019s just a fraud that we get married to be known and accepted and, then, we hide. Spiritually, we become resentful; and we pull back from each other. But the best marriages\/the best marriages are the marriages, where each partner says to the other: \u201cYou know what? Before I\u2019m my kids\u2019 mom or dad; before I\u2019m my boss\u2019s employee; before I\u2019m my company\u2019s boss; before I\u2019m my parents\u2019 child; before I\u2019m my hobby\u2019s addict, <em>I am yours.<\/em>\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle:<\/strong> That\u2019s Gary Thomas with a story illustrating a marriage that goes the distance, where each person dies to self. You know, during that talk, Gary also brought out the verse in Proverbs\u2014Proverbs 17, verse 17, that says, \u201cA friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.\u201d Gary said that, if it\u2019s true of a brother, then really you should be able to say that it should be even <em>more true<\/em> for a marriage facing a challenge. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs Gary said: \u201cWhen we get married, we think the other person is beautiful. They\u2019re full of energy; they\u2019re full of life; we have a good time together.\u201d But then, we get married; and then they might get discouraged, or they might get depressed, or they might get addicted, and they have a problem. Gary wanted to encourage those, who heard his message, that we need to know that we were born for <em>this<\/em>\u2014kind of like Pastor Grant said about his wife and their marriage\u2014you need to rise to the challenge and say, \u201cI was born for this.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, while we were on the cruise, Dennis Rainey and Bob Lepine spoke to somebody else who had to wrestle through, \u201cWas I born for this?\u201d I\u2019m talking about Laura Story. Laura is a worship leader; and she is known for her song, <em>Blessings<\/em>. She is married to Martin. They live in Atlanta, and she has a little girl and twin boys. Now, having three kids under the age of four is hard! But for Laura, it\u2019s even more complicated.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous <em>Love Like You Mean It <\/em>Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You guys went through a really challenging season\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014over the last couple of years. Tell listeners about that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> We have! About eight years ago, Martin was diagnosed with a brain tumor, and he went through a couple different surgeries. He lives today with a brain injury. I think anyone who has either done life with a disability\u2014mental or physical\u2014or has done life with someone with a disability knows that it\u2019s just a tough road.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMarriage is hard anyway. And I think that marriage plus disability: it \u00a0definitely teaches you to rely on the Lord.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> What are his disabilities today?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Oh, gracious! Well, he has a short-term memory deficit. He has some balance issues. He only has 50 percent of his vision. He has trouble\u2014like kind of a time conception deficit. He had damage to his hypothalamus, so he has trouble sensing hot and cold, or full\/hungry, thirsty\u2014things like that. There\u2019s really\u2014brain injuries are so funny, because sometimes there\u2019s one area that isn\u2019t affected at all. As far as his cognitive ability, he\u2019s still there; he\u2019s still the same person he\u2019s always been. But on the other side, with the memory, it really\/it\u2019s kind of interesting.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHopefully, you\u2019ll get to meet him; he\u2019s here this week. You can have a conversation with him, and he seems just fine.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> As a husband, there\u2019s this\u2014it\u2019s built into us: to want to provide, protect, take care of\u2014to do all of the things a husband is supposed to do. Is he able to embrace that and <em>be<\/em> that for you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Yes; well, I think it depends on what your definition of the husband being the leader. You know, for me, he\u2019s the spiritual leader of our family; because he is the lead pray-er; he\u2019s the lead repenter. He is far more spiritual than I will ever be. He doesn\u2019t provide for us financially; but in some ways, I kind of wonder whether I really do? I feel like to write songs and get checks in the mail\u2014that\u2019s really God providing for us\u2014I truly see Him as our Provider. [Applause] Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMartin\u2019s a great, great man. No disability\u2014it\u2019s funny; this is kind of related\u2014I think, for a while\u2014you know, disability really is very tough on a marriage. Anyone that has been through that, even if it\u2019s a short-term thing, knows that it\u2019s just hard! For a while, we really saw it as being: \u201cThat\u2019s the problem in our marriage.\u201d For me, I guess, it was a couple of years ago, when I realized that Martin\u2019s disability isn\u2019t the problem in our marriage. Our sin is the problem in our marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s not that it\u2019s a husband\u2019s job that is the problem, or it\u2019s not that it\u2019s the wife\u2019s past; it\u2019s not things like that. The problem in our marriage is always our sin.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Just with his disability, you know, there are times he\u2019ll have to ask me things over and over again; and for me, I can either get <em>frustrated<\/em> with that, and act out because of my sin and selfishness, and not wanting to be inconvenienced; or if I truly am living the way that God wants me to, I can see that as an opportunity to serve, and honor, and love my husband five more times than another wife might be able to.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We all have challenges that come our way. The question is: \u201cDo we deal with those challenges in a God-honoring way or in a selfish way?\u201d; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Absolutely!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And people have disabilities, and they have limps you can see. Some have disabilities and limps you can\u2019t see.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014you can\u2019t see; right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> But all of those were meant to be, I think, used in our lives to bless us. When you get married, you don\u2019t get married to go through what you\u2019ve been through. But when we pledge\/when we pledge: \u201c\u2026in sickness and in health,\u201d it\u2019s a covenant. I admire you keeping your covenant, and caring for your husband, and writing about it to give others hope and encouragement to do the same.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Well, I think, a lot of times, people feel like God blesses us, you know, when He gives us that health, wealth, and prosperity. We have seen God bless us in some ways, even if it was just showing us how <em>deeply<\/em> we need God; how deeply we need Jesus at the very core of our marriage every single day.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Laura singing <em>Blessings<\/em>]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle:<\/strong> That\u2019s Laura Story. Hearing her story kind of gives new light to her song; doesn\u2019t it? Laura Story\u2019s got a new book out, entitled <em>When God Doesn\u2019t Fix It. <\/em>She also has a new CD out. Go to our website, FamilyLifeThisWeek.com; that\u2019s FamilyLifeThisWeek.com for more information.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHey, we need to take a break! But on the other side of the break, we\u2019re going to hear from Voddie Baucham. I can guarantee you do not want to shut off the radio or turn off your device, because Voddie is fabulous! Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Radio Station Spot Break]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Welcome back to <em>FamilyLife This Week<\/em>. I'm Michelle Hill. Hey, I am taking you on a cruise today. Hopefully, you maybe put on some surf board shorts and maybe a t-shirt, lathered up with some of your suntan lotion on and a straw hat, maybe your sunglasses; because we are aboard the <em>Love Like You Mean It<\/em> marriage cruise that FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> puts on every year, and hearing some <em>great<\/em> teaching from men and women, who are encouraging us in our marriages.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the speakers that I really love hearing is Voddie Baucham. I just <em>love<\/em> hearing the truth that he brings out of God\u2019s Word. Currently, he is Dean of a seminary in Zambia; but before that, he and his family lived in Spring, Texas, where he was pastor at Grace Family Baptist Church. He has written lots of books, including <em>Family-Driven Faith. <\/em>Voddie is known as a straight-shooter, especially when it comes to God\u2019s Word and the purpose of marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous<em> Love Like You Mean It <\/em>Message]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Voddie:<\/strong> Here is the one thing that I want to say to you today: \u201cThe marriage that God wants you to have is not the one you\u2019re in right now.\u201d [Laughter] Some of y\u2019all are clapping for the wrong reasons! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you want to understand what I mean, look at Ephesians, Chapter 5, and let\u2019s look first at verse 32: \u201cThis mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.\u201d The most complete teaching on marriage that we find in all of Scripture is found right here in Ephesians, Chapter 5. In verse 32, as he comes to this conclusion and makes his summation, he says, \u201cYou know, this mystery is great; and I\u2019m telling you that it refers to Christ and the church.\u201d That\u2019s <em>significant<\/em>!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo whatever it is that Paul just taught us about marriage, it points to a reality that is <em>greater<\/em> than the relationship you have with your spouse. Think about it this way\u2014your marriage is the picture\u2014it\u2019s not the reality\u2014it\u2019s the picture! There is something that your marriage represents that is <em>far greater<\/em> than <em>anything<\/em> that you and your spouse can or will ever experience in the here and the now. This is merely a foretaste, which means that we must <em>never<\/em> pour a sense of ultimacy into our marriage relationships in the here and now. It\u2019s wrong; it\u2019s wrong. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor many of us, our marriages are <em>not <\/em>about the exaltation of Christ. You sit couples down, and you talk about the things that are <em>wrong<\/em> with their marriage. It\u2019s usually not those things that don\u2019t reflect the sense of ultimacy in where we\u2019re going; that don\u2019t reflect that it\u2019s Christ to whom we\u2019re going to be wed, and He\u2019s dealing with sin and our hatred of sin, and our desire for His exaltation\u2014it\u2019s usually not that!\u2014it\u2019s usually: \u201cThis is what I <em>want, <\/em>and I\u2019m not getting it! Therefore, this thing is broken.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFinally, there\u2019s this picture of consummation. So open with me to Revelation, \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tChapter 19, beginning at verse 6: \u201cThen I heard what seemed to be the voice of a great multitude, like the roar of many waters, and like the sound of mighty peals of thunder crying out, \u2018Hallelujah! For the Lord our God, the Almighty, reigns! Let us rejoice and exalt and give Him glory!\u2019\u201d\u2014Why?\u2014\u201cFor the marriage of the Lamb has come,\u201d\/\u201cfor the marriage of the Lamb has come.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe doesn\u2019t stop there. What\u2019s the significance of the marriage of the Lamb?\u2014consummation! \u201cAnd His bride has made herself ready. It was granted her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure, for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints.\u201d What does this mean? Not only that God has judged sin, but it also means that God has brought you, if you belong to Him, perfect righteousness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what we yearn for\u2014perfect righteousness\u2014for God to form in me holiness; for God to use my marriage as a sanctifying tool to make me more like Christ. It means that being miserable in your marriage does not necessarily mean that your marriage is broken and that it\u2019s over. In fact, it may mean the exact opposite; because there are some things that only misery can grow in you; amen?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Audience: <\/strong>Amen!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Voddie:<\/strong> \u201cWell, what if the misery never goes away? What if I stay married to this person, and it stays miserable?\u201d \u201cThere is a day coming when your misery will be no more.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cWait a minute; wait a minute. You\u2019re saying to me that I wait for Christ to make all things right.\u201d \u201cYes; yes, I am.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cYes, but\u2014that\u2019s\u2014no; I don\u2019t want to do that.\u201d \u201cOf course, you don\u2019t. Nor did the martyrs, who were vindicated\u2014on the same day, by the way\u2014wanted to be martyred. But they laid down their <em>lives<\/em> for the cause of Christ, because <em>He<\/em> was their hope. Is Christ your hope? Is Christ enough?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou see, the problem I have with you bailing on this thing\u2014\u201cI\u2019m in a marriage right now, and I\u2019m miserable,\u201d\u2014\u201cWhy?\u201d\u2014\u201cBecause this person is not making me happy,\u201d\u2014now, this person was never designed to make me happy; this person wasn\u2019t created to make me happy. That is supposed to come from Christ. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cBut this person doesn\u2019t make me happy.\u201d \u201cSo what are you going to do?\u201d \u201cI\u2019m going to leave this person in hopes of finding <em>another<\/em> person who actually <em>does <\/em>make me happy.\u201d \u201cWell, if they don\u2019t, you\u2019re in the same misery you were before. If they <em>do<\/em>, you\u2019re an idolater. How\u2019s that working for you?\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDoes this mean that we\u2019re hopeless?\u2014absolutely not. Why?\u2014remember, your marriage in the here and now is a picture and reflection of the marriage that God wants for you that is yet to come. You don\u2019t get there by looking to your spouse. This doesn\u2019t happen\/this doesn\u2019t work by looking to your spouse. This only works by looking to our Redeemer; because He is, indeed, our only hope.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle:<\/strong> Voddie Baucham doing what he does best in pointing us to our Savior. I could listen to him all day! In fact, if you want to hear more of Voddie Baucham, go to our website, FamilyLifeThisWeek.com; that\u2019s FamilyLifeThisWeek.com.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHey, next week, we are going to hear from Elisabeth Elliott and also Leslie Leyland Fields and a few other others. We\u2019re going to talk about\/well, remember the Apostle Paul, in the book of Romans in the Bible, said something like, \u201cI do what I <em>don\u2019t<\/em> want to do [emphasis added].\u201d What did he mean? You know, those pesky little things that we do that aren\u2019t quite right? Well, they\u2019re really not right at all; and yet, we <em>love<\/em> to do them. Or we try so hard <em>not<\/em> to do them, and we just continue to flub up over and over and over again. We\u2019re going to take a look at those flub-ups and maybe learn some things. That will happen next week on <em>FamilyLife This Week.<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThanks for listening! I want to thank the president of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, David Robbins, along with our station partners around the country. A big, \u201cThank you!\u201d to our engineer today, Keith Lynch. Thanks to our producers, Marques Holt and Bruce Goff. Justin Adams is our mastering engineer, and Megan Martin is our production coordinator.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur program is a production of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, and our mission is to effectively develop godly families who change the world one home at a time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI'm Michelle Hill, inviting you to join us again next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife This Week.<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<sup>\u00a9<\/sup>Song: <em>Blessings<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tArtist: Laura Story\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAlbum: <em>Blessings <\/em><sup>\u00a9<\/sup>2011, Laura Story Music\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"about:blank\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2022 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"about:blank\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:27:11"],"show_notes":[""],"filesize":["24.89M"],"filesize_raw":["26097338"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-307441.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-307441.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: 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was intended to be a lifetime covenant. Be inspired and encouraged in your marriage commitment from guests Gary Thomas, Laura Story, and Voddie Baucham.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/flw\/flw2022-03-19.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle:<\/strong> Everyday struggles are normal in marriage; maybe he forgot to take the trash out, or she didn\u2019t have the meal ready on time. But for some of you, it\u2019s not about the trash or the meal; it\u2019s something more serious. Here\u2019s Laura Story.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Disability really is very tough on a marriage. Anyone that has been through that, even if it\u2019s a short-term thing, knows that it\u2019s just hard! For a while, we really saw it as being: \u201cThat\u2019s the problem in our marriage.\u201d For me, I guess, it was a couple of years ago when I realized that Martin\u2019s disability isn\u2019t the problem in our marriage; our sin is the problem in our marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle:<\/strong> You know, life is tough; and when you put two sinners together in marriage, it\u2019s even tougher. Today, we\u2019re going to give you some tips on going the distance in your marriage. Stay tuned to <em>FamilyLife This Week<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWelcome to <em>FamilyLife This Week<\/em>. I'm Michelle Hill. A [few] years ago, I went on a cruise. Now, before you say, \u201cOhhh!\u201d I worked the entire time; and I came back, pasty-white, because I was underneath the deck the entire time! It\u2019s because I\u2019m single, and I went on a FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup><em>Love Like You Mean It<\/em><sup>\u00ae <\/sup><em>marriage<\/em> cruise; so can I get a collective, \u201cAww\u201d [crowd voices]? Thank you; thank you! That\u2019s what I needed. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, the one thing I was surprised by was the number of couples who attended the <em>Love Like You Mean It<\/em> marriage cruise, year, after year, after year. Now, of course, the warm weather, and the sun, and the time away was all part of it; but a big part for <em>many<\/em> was building into their marriage, because they want their marriage to go the distance.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tToday, I\u2019m going to take you on a cruise or, at least, let you hear a little bit of what the folks on the boat heard. You see, this is really <em>good stuff<\/em>! This is solid, biblical content that encouraged <em>them<\/em>; so I\u2019m hoping it will encourage <em>you<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the speakers that folks get to hear regularly is Gary Thomas. Gary is an international speaker and best-selling author. In fact, you might recognize a couple of his books: <em>Sacred Marriage, Authentic Faith. <\/em>He and his wife live in Houston, Texas, with their three kids. He has run the Boston Marathon three times, so it\u2019s safe to say that he\u2019s an avid runner. Well, Gary shared a story about a pastor friend of his. This friend really gets the idea of his vows, \u201c\u2026\u2019til death do us part.\u201d Here\u2019s Gary. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous <em>Love Like You Mean It <\/em>Message]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Gary:<\/strong> A friend of mine was a pastor up in Canada\u2014a really young man\u2014just one of the most gifted communicators I\u2019ve ever known. Things were going so well, but he was in just one of those really awful church fights\u2014and ended up in a church split\u2014and he was out of a job. It was one of those nasty ones, where there\u2019s a lot of gossip and slander; and people have to be blamed. People were saying <em>awful<\/em> things about him; and he\u2019s a good man with a good heart, but his reputation was just kind of wrecked!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe found himself in a job, crawling under houses for $8 an hour. He had this great vision that God was going to use him and bless his ministry, and it\u2019s just humiliating that he can barely eke out a living. His wife is having to budget, you know, on a third of what they were living on before. She could have gotten down on him; but she said: \u201cHoney, I believe in you. I know God has a plan for you. This is a momentary reprieve.\u201d She <em>never <\/em>lost her faith in him, even with people saying ugly things about him. She was there for him the <em>entire time<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne time, Grant came home; and he was so discouraged. He was dirty, and smelly, and filthy, and made\u2014you know what?\u2014I don\u2019t know\u201470 bucks that day. He walks in the house, and his wife hadn\u2019t heard him walk in; but he hears his wife talking on the phone. He overhears her telling one of the elders in the church: \u201cNo, you <em>can\u2019t<\/em> talk to my husband. I\u2019m his wife; and I just want you to know, if you want to get to him, you have to go through me. And if you find a way to get around me, you\u2019re going to have to deal with me; because he\u2019s my husband, and you\u2019re not going to abuse him anymore!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGrant felt so humbled\u2014that when she could have piled on\u2014she could have, maybe, even said, \u201cYou know, maybe what they\u2019re saying is true,\u201d\u2014but she was there for him! She said, \u201cI was born to get you through this.\u201d And they grew together, and he grew as a believer. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGot put them in a church in the United States\u2014he\u2019s in Bellingham, Washington\u2014and today, his church is the largest church for a city that size in the United States. It has just blossomed, and God has blessed his ministry. [Applause] I was talking to one of his elders a decade ago, and they were telling me: \u201cWe know we\u2019re going to lose him; he\u2019s too gifted. He could be paid three times what we pay him. He would be in a city that\u2019s larger, where people could grow; it\u2019s hard to grow a church when you kind of push the boundaries of the population.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI know\/I thought why Grant hadn\u2019t taken up any of those offers, because he was getting regular contacts. I called him just a year or two ago, when I was working on <em>A Life-Long Love<\/em>. I said: \u201cHey, Grant! Just between you and me\u2014I won\u2019t tell anybody! I just need to know, between you and me\u201d\u2014[Laughter]\u2014you see, Grant\u2019s wife, Laurel, the one who protected him, has been going steadily blind until, now, she is almost completely blind. They\u2019re in the small community of Linden, Washington, where she knows their house; she knows the community. Everything is set up for her. I said, \u201cI\u2019m guessing that the primary reason you\u2019re still in Bellingham is it\u2019s really the best place for Laurel to live.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGrant was silent for a long while; and he said, \u201cI can\u2019t deny that.\u201d I love it\u2014where she said, when he was down\u2014\u201cI was born for this!\u201d His wife is down; he says: \u201cI was born for this! Before I was born to be some big-shot pastor, I was born to be my wife\u2019s husband. I\u2019m not going to resent it that I\u2019m stuck here in this town.\u201d He doesn\u2019t look at it that way! \u201cI\u2019m not going to resent it that I can\u2019t follow these opportunities, because the best opportunity in my life is to be connected to my wife\/to be a husband. A lot of men with big churches live with empty souls, because they have distant marriages.\u201d Grant said, \u201cI think it\u2019s better to have a pretty large church and a connected marriage and to be honoring her.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThese are <em>tough<\/em> things; but you have to ask yourself: \u201cWhat do you want? What do you want out of your marriage?\u201d \u201cDo you want to just co-exist? Do you want to just get by, and maybe just reduce the level of conflict?\u201d or \u201cDo you really want to be <em>connected<\/em> as a couple?\u201d \u201cWhat do you want out of your marriage?\u201d So often, it\u2019s just a fraud that we get married to be known and accepted and, then, we hide. Spiritually, we become resentful; and we pull back from each other. But the best marriages\/the best marriages are the marriages, where each partner says to the other: \u201cYou know what? Before I\u2019m my kids\u2019 mom or dad; before I\u2019m my boss\u2019s employee; before I\u2019m my company\u2019s boss; before I\u2019m my parents\u2019 child; before I\u2019m my hobby\u2019s addict, <em>I am yours.<\/em>\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle:<\/strong> That\u2019s Gary Thomas with a story illustrating a marriage that goes the distance, where each person dies to self. You know, during that talk, Gary also brought out the verse in Proverbs\u2014Proverbs 17, verse 17, that says, \u201cA friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.\u201d Gary said that, if it\u2019s true of a brother, then really you should be able to say that it should be even <em>more true<\/em> for a marriage facing a challenge. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs Gary said: \u201cWhen we get married, we think the other person is beautiful. They\u2019re full of energy; they\u2019re full of life; we have a good time together.\u201d But then, we get married; and then they might get discouraged, or they might get depressed, or they might get addicted, and they have a problem. Gary wanted to encourage those, who heard his message, that we need to know that we were born for <em>this<\/em>\u2014kind of like Pastor Grant said about his wife and their marriage\u2014you need to rise to the challenge and say, \u201cI was born for this.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, while we were on the cruise, Dennis Rainey and Bob Lepine spoke to somebody else who had to wrestle through, \u201cWas I born for this?\u201d I\u2019m talking about Laura Story. Laura is a worship leader; and she is known for her song, <em>Blessings<\/em>. She is married to Martin. They live in Atlanta, and she has a little girl and twin boys. Now, having three kids under the age of four is hard! But for Laura, it\u2019s even more complicated.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous <em>Love Like You Mean It <\/em>Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You guys went through a really challenging season\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014over the last couple of years. Tell listeners about that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> We have! About eight years ago, Martin was diagnosed with a brain tumor, and he went through a couple different surgeries. He lives today with a brain injury. I think anyone who has either done life with a disability\u2014mental or physical\u2014or has done life with someone with a disability knows that it\u2019s just a tough road.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMarriage is hard anyway. And I think that marriage plus disability: it \u00a0definitely teaches you to rely on the Lord.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> What are his disabilities today?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Oh, gracious! Well, he has a short-term memory deficit. He has some balance issues. He only has 50 percent of his vision. He has trouble\u2014like kind of a time conception deficit. He had damage to his hypothalamus, so he has trouble sensing hot and cold, or full\/hungry, thirsty\u2014things like that. There\u2019s really\u2014brain injuries are so funny, because sometimes there\u2019s one area that isn\u2019t affected at all. As far as his cognitive ability, he\u2019s still there; he\u2019s still the same person he\u2019s always been. But on the other side, with the memory, it really\/it\u2019s kind of interesting.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHopefully, you\u2019ll get to meet him; he\u2019s here this week. You can have a conversation with him, and he seems just fine.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> As a husband, there\u2019s this\u2014it\u2019s built into us: to want to provide, protect, take care of\u2014to do all of the things a husband is supposed to do. Is he able to embrace that and <em>be<\/em> that for you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Yes; well, I think it depends on what your definition of the husband being the leader. You know, for me, he\u2019s the spiritual leader of our family; because he is the lead pray-er; he\u2019s the lead repenter. He is far more spiritual than I will ever be. He doesn\u2019t provide for us financially; but in some ways, I kind of wonder whether I really do? I feel like to write songs and get checks in the mail\u2014that\u2019s really God providing for us\u2014I truly see Him as our Provider. [Applause] Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMartin\u2019s a great, great man. No disability\u2014it\u2019s funny; this is kind of related\u2014I think, for a while\u2014you know, disability really is very tough on a marriage. Anyone that has been through that, even if it\u2019s a short-term thing, knows that it\u2019s just hard! For a while, we really saw it as being: \u201cThat\u2019s the problem in our marriage.\u201d For me, I guess, it was a couple of years ago, when I realized that Martin\u2019s disability isn\u2019t the problem in our marriage. Our sin is the problem in our marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s not that it\u2019s a husband\u2019s job that is the problem, or it\u2019s not that it\u2019s the wife\u2019s past; it\u2019s not things like that. The problem in our marriage is always our sin.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Just with his disability, you know, there are times he\u2019ll have to ask me things over and over again; and for me, I can either get <em>frustrated<\/em> with that, and act out because of my sin and selfishness, and not wanting to be inconvenienced; or if I truly am living the way that God wants me to, I can see that as an opportunity to serve, and honor, and love my husband five more times than another wife might be able to.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We all have challenges that come our way. The question is: \u201cDo we deal with those challenges in a God-honoring way or in a selfish way?\u201d; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Absolutely!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And people have disabilities, and they have limps you can see. Some have disabilities and limps you can\u2019t see.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014you can\u2019t see; right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> But all of those were meant to be, I think, used in our lives to bless us. When you get married, you don\u2019t get married to go through what you\u2019ve been through. But when we pledge\/when we pledge: \u201c\u2026in sickness and in health,\u201d it\u2019s a covenant. I admire you keeping your covenant, and caring for your husband, and writing about it to give others hope and encouragement to do the same.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Well, I think, a lot of times, people feel like God blesses us, you know, when He gives us that health, wealth, and prosperity. We have seen God bless us in some ways, even if it was just showing us how <em>deeply<\/em> we need God; how deeply we need Jesus at the very core of our marriage every single day.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Laura singing <em>Blessings<\/em>]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle:<\/strong> That\u2019s Laura Story. Hearing her story kind of gives new light to her song; doesn\u2019t it? Laura Story\u2019s got a new book out, entitled <em>When God Doesn\u2019t Fix It. <\/em>She also has a new CD out. Go to our website, FamilyLifeThisWeek.com; that\u2019s FamilyLifeThisWeek.com for more information.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHey, we need to take a break! But on the other side of the break, we\u2019re going to hear from Voddie Baucham. I can guarantee you do not want to shut off the radio or turn off your device, because Voddie is fabulous! Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Radio Station Spot Break]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Welcome back to <em>FamilyLife This Week<\/em>. I'm Michelle Hill. Hey, I am taking you on a cruise today. Hopefully, you maybe put on some surf board shorts and maybe a t-shirt, lathered up with some of your suntan lotion on and a straw hat, maybe your sunglasses; because we are aboard the <em>Love Like You Mean It<\/em> marriage cruise that FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> puts on every year, and hearing some <em>great<\/em> teaching from men and women, who are encouraging us in our marriages.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the speakers that I really love hearing is Voddie Baucham. I just <em>love<\/em> hearing the truth that he brings out of God\u2019s Word. Currently, he is Dean of a seminary in Zambia; but before that, he and his family lived in Spring, Texas, where he was pastor at Grace Family Baptist Church. He has written lots of books, including <em>Family-Driven Faith. <\/em>Voddie is known as a straight-shooter, especially when it comes to God\u2019s Word and the purpose of marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous<em> Love Like You Mean It <\/em>Message]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Voddie:<\/strong> Here is the one thing that I want to say to you today: \u201cThe marriage that God wants you to have is not the one you\u2019re in right now.\u201d [Laughter] Some of y\u2019all are clapping for the wrong reasons! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you want to understand what I mean, look at Ephesians, Chapter 5, and let\u2019s look first at verse 32: \u201cThis mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.\u201d The most complete teaching on marriage that we find in all of Scripture is found right here in Ephesians, Chapter 5. In verse 32, as he comes to this conclusion and makes his summation, he says, \u201cYou know, this mystery is great; and I\u2019m telling you that it refers to Christ and the church.\u201d That\u2019s <em>significant<\/em>!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo whatever it is that Paul just taught us about marriage, it points to a reality that is <em>greater<\/em> than the relationship you have with your spouse. Think about it this way\u2014your marriage is the picture\u2014it\u2019s not the reality\u2014it\u2019s the picture! There is something that your marriage represents that is <em>far greater<\/em> than <em>anything<\/em> that you and your spouse can or will ever experience in the here and the now. This is merely a foretaste, which means that we must <em>never<\/em> pour a sense of ultimacy into our marriage relationships in the here and now. It\u2019s wrong; it\u2019s wrong. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor many of us, our marriages are <em>not <\/em>about the exaltation of Christ. You sit couples down, and you talk about the things that are <em>wrong<\/em> with their marriage. It\u2019s usually not those things that don\u2019t reflect the sense of ultimacy in where we\u2019re going; that don\u2019t reflect that it\u2019s Christ to whom we\u2019re going to be wed, and He\u2019s dealing with sin and our hatred of sin, and our desire for His exaltation\u2014it\u2019s usually not that!\u2014it\u2019s usually: \u201cThis is what I <em>want, <\/em>and I\u2019m not getting it! Therefore, this thing is broken.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFinally, there\u2019s this picture of consummation. So open with me to Revelation, \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tChapter 19, beginning at verse 6: \u201cThen I heard what seemed to be the voice of a great multitude, like the roar of many waters, and like the sound of mighty peals of thunder crying out, \u2018Hallelujah! For the Lord our God, the Almighty, reigns! Let us rejoice and exalt and give Him glory!\u2019\u201d\u2014Why?\u2014\u201cFor the marriage of the Lamb has come,\u201d\/\u201cfor the marriage of the Lamb has come.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe doesn\u2019t stop there. What\u2019s the significance of the marriage of the Lamb?\u2014consummation! \u201cAnd His bride has made herself ready. It was granted her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure, for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints.\u201d What does this mean? Not only that God has judged sin, but it also means that God has brought you, if you belong to Him, perfect righteousness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what we yearn for\u2014perfect righteousness\u2014for God to form in me holiness; for God to use my marriage as a sanctifying tool to make me more like Christ. It means that being miserable in your marriage does not necessarily mean that your marriage is broken and that it\u2019s over. In fact, it may mean the exact opposite; because there are some things that only misery can grow in you; amen?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Audience: <\/strong>Amen!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Voddie:<\/strong> \u201cWell, what if the misery never goes away? What if I stay married to this person, and it stays miserable?\u201d \u201cThere is a day coming when your misery will be no more.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cWait a minute; wait a minute. You\u2019re saying to me that I wait for Christ to make all things right.\u201d \u201cYes; yes, I am.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cYes, but\u2014that\u2019s\u2014no; I don\u2019t want to do that.\u201d \u201cOf course, you don\u2019t. Nor did the martyrs, who were vindicated\u2014on the same day, by the way\u2014wanted to be martyred. But they laid down their <em>lives<\/em> for the cause of Christ, because <em>He<\/em> was their hope. Is Christ your hope? Is Christ enough?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou see, the problem I have with you bailing on this thing\u2014\u201cI\u2019m in a marriage right now, and I\u2019m miserable,\u201d\u2014\u201cWhy?\u201d\u2014\u201cBecause this person is not making me happy,\u201d\u2014now, this person was never designed to make me happy; this person wasn\u2019t created to make me happy. That is supposed to come from Christ. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cBut this person doesn\u2019t make me happy.\u201d \u201cSo what are you going to do?\u201d \u201cI\u2019m going to leave this person in hopes of finding <em>another<\/em> person who actually <em>does <\/em>make me happy.\u201d \u201cWell, if they don\u2019t, you\u2019re in the same misery you were before. If they <em>do<\/em>, you\u2019re an idolater. How\u2019s that working for you?\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDoes this mean that we\u2019re hopeless?\u2014absolutely not. Why?\u2014remember, your marriage in the here and now is a picture and reflection of the marriage that God wants for you that is yet to come. You don\u2019t get there by looking to your spouse. This doesn\u2019t happen\/this doesn\u2019t work by looking to your spouse. This only works by looking to our Redeemer; because He is, indeed, our only hope.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle:<\/strong> Voddie Baucham doing what he does best in pointing us to our Savior. I could listen to him all day! In fact, if you want to hear more of Voddie Baucham, go to our website, FamilyLifeThisWeek.com; that\u2019s FamilyLifeThisWeek.com.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHey, next week, we are going to hear from Elisabeth Elliott and also Leslie Leyland Fields and a few other others. We\u2019re going to talk about\/well, remember the Apostle Paul, in the book of Romans in the Bible, said something like, \u201cI do what I <em>don\u2019t<\/em> want to do [emphasis added].\u201d What did he mean? You know, those pesky little things that we do that aren\u2019t quite right? Well, they\u2019re really not right at all; and yet, we <em>love<\/em> to do them. Or we try so hard <em>not<\/em> to do them, and we just continue to flub up over and over and over again. We\u2019re going to take a look at those flub-ups and maybe learn some things. That will happen next week on <em>FamilyLife This Week.<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThanks for listening! I want to thank the president of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, David Robbins, along with our station partners around the country. A big, \u201cThank you!\u201d to our engineer today, Keith Lynch. Thanks to our producers, Marques Holt and Bruce Goff. Justin Adams is our mastering engineer, and Megan Martin is our production coordinator.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur program is a production of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, and our mission is to effectively develop godly families who change the world one home at a time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI'm Michelle Hill, inviting you to join us again next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife This Week.<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<sup>\u00a9<\/sup>Song: <em>Blessings<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tArtist: Laura Story\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAlbum: <em>Blessings <\/em><sup>\u00a9<\/sup>2011, Laura Story Music\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"about:blank\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2022 FamilyLife. 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