{"id":306560,"date":"2020-11-18T07:00:05","date_gmt":"2020-11-18T12:00:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/a-downward-turn\/"},"modified":"2020-11-18T07:00:05","modified_gmt":"2020-11-18T12:00:05","slug":"a-downward-turn","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/a-downward-turn\/","title":{"rendered":"A Downward Turn"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Craig Svensson walks us through his son Eric&#8217;s painful journey with drugs and addiction. After taking several steps to stop Eric&#8217;s drug use, Craig and his wife continued to pray that Eric could be rescued from this downward spiral.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/mp3.familylife.com\/fl2020-11-18.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:26:56","filesize":"24.67M","filesize_raw":"25863373","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2840,2855],"tags":[4296],"podcast_series":[8410],"cwp_profile":[9673],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-306560","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-addiction","category-teens","tag-prodigals","podcast_series-the-painful-path-of-a-prodigal","cwp_profile-craig-svensson","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/306560\/a-downward-turn","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/306560\/a-downward-turn","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"nhACGR5aBY\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/a-downward-turn\/\">A Downward Turn<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/a-downward-turn\/embed\/#?secret=nhACGR5aBY\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;A Downward Turn&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"nhACGR5aBY\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/fl2020-11-18.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/mp3.familylife.com\/fl2020-11-18.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>When a son or a daughter starts heading in a direction different from the way he or she was raised, parents rightly become alarmed. Craig Svensson knows something about this; he was the father of a prodigal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>It\u2019s an incredible burden when you see your child making destructive choices, and it\u2019s very difficult to watch. It\u2019s so painful; you just want to try to get them on the right road. But you know, when you have a prodigal in your family, it is so absorbing that it\u2019s easy to neglect your other children; because so much time and energy has to be poured into a prodigal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Wednesday, November 18<sup>th<\/sup>. Our hosts are Dave and Ann Wilson; I'm Bob Lepine. You can find us online at FamilyLifeToday.com. What should parents do when a son or a daughter is starting to make destructive choices? I mean, beyond praying, what do we do? We\u2019ll talk more about that today. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. We are stepping into a subject that is going to be a pain point for a lot of our listeners, and it\u2019s a pain point to revisit some of what we\u2019re going to hear about today.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>It will be very relatable for many.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Yes; I mean, you can say one word and it evokes emotion: \u201cprodigal.\u201d Just say the word and you have a whole array of thoughts, and feelings, and emotions.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Craig Svensson is joining us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>; Craig, welcome to the program.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>It\u2019s a delight to be here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Craig lives in Indiana. He is a part\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>That means he\u2019s a Hoosier! I went to college in Indiana; I appreciate Hoosiers.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Speaking of college, Craig is on the faculty at Purdue University and teaches pharmacology; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Correct.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Craig has been married for 36 years, father of three. We\u2019re going to talk about one of your kids today, and about this chapter in your life and in your marriage, because you\u2019ve written a book called <em>The Painful Path of a Prodigal<\/em>. What we\u2019re talking about\u2014this painful experience\u2014is something that you and your wife never expected you would be going through but found yourself in the middle of about 15\/20 years ago; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Correct.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>When did you start to look at each other and say, \u201cWe have a child, who\u2019s not just acting out, but somebody who is strongly self-willed, who I\u2019m not sure how he\u2019s doing\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes; I would say probably that was late elementary school. You know, a prodigal doesn\u2019t become a prodigal overnight. There are serious heart issues there that develop over time. You have no idea where it\u2019s going to go when things start turning south; and obviously, it just causes your prayer to drive up.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor us, probably the big downturn started when our son Eric turned 15. That\u2019s when he began a very deep descent into drug abuse and all of its associated problems that come with that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So 12 to 15, what were you observing then that really was the bud that was not yet flowered as a prodigal?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>I think, first and foremost, it was an unwillingness to seek God and His will in his life and a rebellion against those things. It was issues that arose in school of not wanting to submit to authority, of acting out in school, of doing things that were obviously disruptive in the classroom and outside the classroom, getting into mischief. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you see a consistent pattern of that, then you begin to worry and say, \u201cAlright; this is more than just an occasional phenomenon. What\u2019s going on in his heart here?\u201d and struggling with him there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>You had had two older kids that you <em>didn\u2019t<\/em> see this going on?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes; certainly, our daughter, who was the closest to him, was probably the polar opposite of that, whose life experiences were so close in time\u2014and therefore, so much of what <em>they<\/em> experienced in terms of our parenting, what they experienced in our church, what they experienced in school was so identical\u2014because they\u2019re so close in age.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Do you think her compliance was a factor in his desire to be different\/to be his own person?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>No; I think it was his draw to sin. That\u2019s, ultimately, what it is when someone enters into rebellion; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>It is because they are drawn to sin rather than the things of God. Really, that\u2019s the natural path of us all; we have a sin nature. David said: \u201cBehold, I was born in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me,\u201d \u201cThe wicked go astray from the womb,\u201d we are told. The <em>real<\/em> remarkable thing is that anyone follows Jesus. The natural path is the path of rebellion, and it\u2019s only when God does a work of grace in the heart of a child that you see them going a different path.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What kinds of conversations were you having with your son in these early days, when there were behavior issues at school and you were trying to intervene and get him back on the right track? Was he responsive to what you were saying, or was he tuning you out?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>I think it probably varied with the day, you know. There were times when he would listen. We would certainly\/we had him involved in youth group\u2014and all those other activities\u2014very involved in Sunday school; he was also involved in extracurricular activities that you might think would build his character. We tried to spend some time through Proverbs with him, which is a <em>great<\/em> resource for parents to point children to what the natural consequences are of certain types of behavior.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCertainly, he saw those things; and you could see there was a struggle. I don\u2019t think, at that age, I would call him just open, full-borne rebellion. He would have his good times and his bad times. But we could tell that he struggled with self-control and being able not to respond in anger, or not taking advantage of a window of opportunity for mischief\u2014that he would seize it was his tendency.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>I think, as parents, we <em>all<\/em> go through stages with our kids. We\u2019re hoping and we\u2019re thinking, \u201cIs this just a stage?\u201d I think, because our kids go up and down and they\u2019re kind of all over the place, was there a point even that your wife thought, \u201cThis has gone on a little longer than we had anticipated\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>I think, for us, when we discovered him involved in drug use at the age of 15, that was a critical turning point. Literally, what happened is I walked outside of our garage and went to the side of the house. I was looking for him to call him for dinner; and he was at the side of the house, smoking a marijuana joint. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFirst of all, that was our <em>first<\/em> clear indication that he was using drugs. Secondly, I have enough of a background to know, when a kid is using drugs <em>alone<\/em> and in isolation, that\u2019s a <em>real<\/em> serious concern. Most drug use takes place in a social setting; but when you have a kid using a drug by himself, you know you have a very significant problem going on.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>What happened?\u2014you walk around and see him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>It was an interesting moment in his life; because, despite everything that was going on, he had an association with some detectives in the police force in our area. They actually used him, as a shopper, to go into convenience stores\/gas stations to try to buy cigarettes\u2014because he was 15, he was underage\u2014to see if they\u2019d card him. The police would take him, and he would go in; and if he came back out with cigarettes, then they went in and gave them a citation. He had this relationship with two police in our local police department.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Did you <em>know<\/em> that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Oh yes; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>I mean, obviously, they got our permission to be able to do that and everything.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>One of the first things we did is we called the police and talked to them about it\u2014not to arrest him\u2014but to say, \u201cI\u2019m not sure you want him doing this,\u201d and also, \u201cMaybe you would be good people to talk to him.\u201d They actually came and spent\u2014oh, I don\u2019t know; it was over an hour\u2014sitting at our picnic tables in the back, and talking with Eric, and trying to really show him the path that he was likely going down.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tObviously, he had to stop serving that role for them as a shopper; they didn\u2019t want someone like that. There were a couple of times, over the next year or so, that they reached out to him; and numerous people throughout his life, in the difficult times that he went through\u2014we\u2019re grateful for\u2014that reached out and tried to draw him back to a road that was not destructive.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>In the moment, when you walk out and see him smoking a joint, all of a sudden, this is taking you completely by surprise. Were you\/did you become angry? How did you process it, and how did you interact with him?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Well, I think there was a big moment of silence between the two of us; because we realized that a bridge had been crossed, me acknowledging\/seeing him. I just told him, \u201cCome on inside now.\u201d We sat down and I said, \u201cWhy don\u2019t you talk to Mom about what just happened?\u201d and let him converse in his own words that way.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Was there remorse on his part?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>I think remorse at getting <em>caught<\/em>, not remorse at what he had done.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Did your wife respond any different than you did, or\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>I think that her biggest response was disappointment; because again, it was just another step down the road, and realizing, \u201cThis is a really serious step, and what does that portend for the future?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Later that night, after he\u2019s gone to bed, and the two of you are lying side by side in bed, and going, \u201cWhat are we doing? Where do we go from here?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>\u201cWhat do we do next?\u201d That\u2019s <em>always<\/em> the challenge when you\u2019re asking a question about your child, who is clearly on a path: \u201cDo we need outside help? Where do we go? How seriously do we take this?\u201d Because at the same time, you can take a single instance and blow it up to something bigger than it really is. We wanted to be careful, thinking that through.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what really led us to call the police, whom he had worked with. We knew they needed to know anyway; but we thought, \u201cYou know, this is a good place. They\u2019ve obviously been down this road with other young people before; they\u2019ve been involved in interventions.\u201d We hoped that that would have been helpful for him to hear it from them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>\u2014and walking through the consequences of what this could lead to.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Did Eric respond, like, \u201cOkay; I made a mistake; I need to stop this,\u201d or did he\/was he defiant? What was his response?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>It was actually more placid than maybe I would have expected when that happened. He wasn\u2019t really particularly angry with us; he wasn\u2019t, \u201cNo; I don\u2019t want to go down that road anymore.\u201d It was just kind of placid\/more nonresponsive than anything else, to be honest with you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It sounds like\u2014I\u2019m thinking of a 15-year-old, who\u2019s been caught\u2014a placid response seems to me like, \u201cI have to figure out how to manage this better so that Mom and Dad aren\u2019t up in my grill,\u201d and \u201cClearly the side of the house is not the place to go if you want to smoke a joint.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDid he continue with what he was doing, <em>immediately<\/em>; do you think?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes, yes; in fact, much more depth very quickly. His drug use escalated, and problems at the school that he was at also escalated very rapidly. It came to a point, where the school was very concerned; and we were as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt that point in time, we had already done a little bit of counseling with him and realized something like that probably wasn\u2019t going to be enough. We decided that a more significant intervention was going to be necessary. We decided to put him into an explorer-type program\/an outward-bound kind of program, where it\u2019s a wilderness camp that you go, specifically for children that are going through serious rebellion\u2014it may or may not be drug use. We actually got permission from the school to have him leave early and go into that camp early.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe spent\/I guess it was a little bit more than three months in a camp like that in Canada. We put him into that environment to try to help him to come to make better decisions\/realize the path he was going. His anger issues were rising and getting more severe and more serious\u2014and also, to try to address those.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>He goes away for three months?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Were you talking to him?\u2014any communication?\u2014is he on his own?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Our communication was in writing; because they were in a pretty isolated area on an island, so you couldn\u2019t exactly escape, if you will. You couldn\u2019t get your telephone there or anything, but we would write back and forth. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHis letters were mixed. He didn\u2019t go fighting\/he didn\u2019t fight it. He went\/I guess I would say resigned to: \u201cThis is what\u2019s going to happen.\u201d He realized he was getting in more and more difficulty in school and that that path wasn\u2019t going very well either. He went, fairly resigned, to this kind of intervention.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You said his drug use had escalated; he\u2019d gone from marijuana into other drugs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>At that point in time, we\u2019re not sure that he used other drugs, but he just used marijuana much more.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>The group he was hanging out with\u2014I guess was a group that this was what their lives were all about.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Did you think about: \u201cWe have to pull him out of school,\u201d \u201cWe have to transplant him somewhere else, getting him away from this contagion group that he\u2019s a part of\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes; we did certainly think about that. That\u2019s not really easy to do, as you can imagine. You can\u2019t just pick your kid up and go to another school. Because of his difficulties, a lot of schools, obviously, would not take him. A lot of private Christian schools, for examples, wouldn\u2019t take a kid who\u2019s getting in trouble. At the time, he was in a public school.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat happened at that time, though, the Lord just seemed to open the door for when he came out of the residential program for us to change environments completely. We actually, when he went off to this camp, we put our house up for sale. We were living in a suburb north of Detroit; and we were going to move to the west, figuring to get him in a completely different school system\/a different environment; but yet, it was close enough for me to still get back and forth to the university.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe did that; and in the midst of that, another university approached me and said, \u201cHey, we\u2019d like you to consider coming to our university, and to make a move, and come be with us.\u201d They wanted me to be a division head and stuff. It seemed like the Lord was opening a door\u2014right?\u2014to be able to, when he came out of that camp, <em>completely<\/em> change his environment. We, literally, moved a week after he got out of camp and moved to Iowa, where I took a position at the University of Iowa, thinking, \u201cThis will be a really good chance for a start.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe people in our church were wonderfully supportive and praying for us. Everybody around us said, \u201cBoy, this seems like God is really doing a great work here, opening a door to <em>completely<\/em> change Eric\u2019s environment when he comes back.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Talk about the people in your church; because here you guys are, active in a local church; all your friends are church folks. When your kid\u2019s going off to an outward-bound program\u2014because he\u2019s using\/substance abuse\u2014this is the kind of thing you don\u2019t want to talk to friends at church about, or it\u2019s not comfortable to talk to friends at church about.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes, and I was actually serving as the interim preacher for this church.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>They were looking for a pastor, and I served as their interim for three years. It also presented a challenge: \u201cShould I step down in this role at this moment?\u201d I wasn\u2019t\u2014I used the term,\u201d interim preacher\u201d\u2014because of Eric\u2019s rebellion, I wasn\u2019t willing to take on a position of ruling authority\u2014so I wasn\u2019t the interim pastor. They had a group of elders, and the elders fulfilled the roles that you would think of for an elder. My role was really just to do the preaching; and I would do baptisms, and communion, and other types of things that were in the public\/a ceremony and leading in those. It was a particular challenge whether my role should change because of what he was going through. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can say that, overall in that church, the support of the people was, for the most part, wonderful.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Everybody <em>knew<\/em> what was going on with Eric?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Oh, I don\u2019t know if <em>everybody<\/em> knew; but people recognized, and it was pretty well known\u2014and certainly, the elders did\u2014because as things were evolving, I met the elders and said, \u201cHey, this is the situation. Maybe you ought to think about having somebody else step in this role.\u201d They said, \u201cNo, no; as long as you feel like you can do it, we want you to stay there and continue to do that role.\u201d I would say the elders and key people in the church were just very supportive and very helpful to us at times.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hadn\u2019t always experienced that at a previous church we were at, when Eric\u2019s rebellion was really starting. We experienced our share of being judged by others because of his rebellion.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>I\u2019m thinking about your wife\u2014as you guys are lying in bed at night, praying for, I\u2019m sure, your son\u2014but the emotional highs and lows\u2014your fear of: \u201cWhat could this lead to?\u201d but then the hope of: \u201cOkay, he\u2019s getting help,\u201d \u201cThis is going better,\u201d \u201cI\u2019m hoping that God\u2019s going to grab his heart.\u201d What did that look like for you guys? As a woman, I carry that <em>constantly<\/em>; and I\u2019m guessing your wife did too.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>She certainly did, and it\u2019s an incredible burden when you see your child making destructive choices. It\u2019s very difficult to watch; it\u2019s so painful. You just want to try to get them on the right road, but you know that God has to do the work in their heart. It drives you to your knees in prayer; and you plead with God again, and again, and again, and just ask Him to intervene.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe were grateful that there were some men who also recognized and tried to pour themselves into Eric\/sought to be a mentor. As you know, sometimes a child gets to a point, where they don\u2019t want to listen to mom and dad anymore; right? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>One of the beauties of the body of Christ is that there are others, who they may have relationships with, who can come surround them and try to support him. We had some of that; and we\u2019re very, very grateful for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>Were your other kids involved at all, wondering and asking you questions?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Well, our daughter was the only one that was living at home, and I wouldn\u2019t say she gave us advice on what she\u2019d do. She, obviously, was concerned about her brother. But one thing I\u2019ll tell you I wish that I had been more sensitive, early on, about was just how much it was impacting her life. I think, when you have a prodigal in your family, it is so absorbing that it\u2019s easy to neglect your other children; because so much time and energy has to be poured into a prodigal that you can forget about how it\u2019s impacting their lives. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCertainly, it made a difference about her wanting to have other people over at the house; because she didn\u2019t know how he would act out and what he would do. It was embarrassing to her at school; because she had a brother, who others knew was going off in this very dangerous direction. She had her own struggles\u2014I don\u2019t want to speak for what her feelings were about that\u2014but we recognize that: \u201cThis is a trial for her,\u201d\u2014not just for the parents\u2014\u201cThis is a trial for her.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>How about for your own marriage? I know in our home, when there\u2019s something going on with our kids\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>I blame Dave! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Ann will blame me; I\u2019ll blame her. I mean, there\u2019s just tension\u2014even if we agree, still there\u2019s this big thing going on\u2014and there\u2019s pressure; so it affects our marriage. How was it affecting yours?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>I can remember being in bed at night, and I\u2019m saying to Dave, \u201cSo-and-so is not in a good place. I\u2019m worried about what he\u2019s doing right now, out with his friends.\u201d Then Dave would say, \u201cHe\u2019s a <em>great<\/em> kid! He\u2019s not doing anything!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>And she was always right\u2014because he was\u2014that\u2019s a sort of smile moment in our marriage; but there were <em>tense<\/em> moments\/disagreements about what we should do: \u201cHow do we handle this?\u201d Was there any of that going on?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Well, certainly, there\u2019s a tension that gets created. I think, as he went deeper and deeper into drug use and all the consequences, that tension is only greater; because you\u2019re living with this fear of what\u2019s going to happen next. Fortunately, we more leaned into one another than leaned away from one another. We were mostly of one mind. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut there\u2019s no question that a prodigal is going to bring a tremendous amount of tension into a marriage. It\u2019s why one of the priorities, when you\u2019re walking this kind of trial, is to make sure you\u2019re building on your marriage; because it\u2019s going to be stressed by having a prodigal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the things that\u2019s so important is that you come to an understanding that\u2014you may not always agree on what should be done\u2014but you have to agree on what <em>will be<\/em> done, and you have to speak with one voice. There were times when we might not agree with something that my son had asked\/something he wanted, whether we should help him here, let him do this, et cetera. There were times I would say to my wife, \u201cOkay; I don\u2019t agree, but we\u2019ll do what you said. I\u2019ll trust your motherly instincts on this one.\u201d There were other times, maybe I would feel strongly, and we would do what I would say; but we would always present a united front.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne reality is that prodigal children can really drive a wedge between a husband and a wife, trying to get what they want. I mean, we\u2019ve all experienced that with little kids. A little kid comes up, \u201cWell, Mommy said I could\u2026\u201d Well, Mommy didn\u2019t really say that; right? When they get older, they can become very skilled at playing parents off of one another to get what they want. It\u2019s hard to think of your children acting that way, but they do; and you have to be aware of that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe worked hard to make sure we always had a unified voice\/we would have one voice: \u201cThis is what we\u2019ve decided.\u201d We would <em>never<\/em> share that, \u201cWell, I don\u2019t really agree with what Mom\u201d or \u201c\u2026what Dad says.\u201d You <em>never<\/em> want to go there and give them a tool to be able to drive a wedge between you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>One of the things we say at the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, actually on Friday night, as we\u2019re stepping into the weekend with married couples and pre-married couples, is \u201cFive Threats to Your Oneness.\u201d Every marriage is headed toward isolation or oneness. I don\u2019t know which threat it is, Bob\u2014I\u2019ve only done this for 30 years\u2014I don\u2019t even know how we say it, but it\u2019s basically that adversity or trials\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014inevitable difficulties.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>\u2014inevitable difficulties are going to come into your marriage. I always say this: \u201cTrials will make you better or bitter. The choice is yours.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe all know couples\/we know families that have become bitter, even maybe broken up the family for whatever\u2014could be a prodigal\u2014and then we know others that, when through the same thing, they seem to be better. They made a choice to somehow say, \u201cGod can use this, as horrible as it is, for <em>better<\/em> in our life. We can actually become more mature.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt sounds like, as horrible as this was, you still fought to make sure your marriage and your family became better.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I hope every parent, who\u2019s listening, who may be in the middle of this, is hearing what you\u2019re saying about pouring into your marriage; and about being on the same page and presenting a united front; and about making a decision, early on, in this journey, \u201cLook, if we\u2019re going to get through this, we have to get through it together. We\u2019re both in a hard spot, neither of us knows <em>exactly<\/em> the right thing to do; we wish we did.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think part of that journey may involve getting a copy of Craig\u2019s book and reading through it together, and asking each other, \u201cWhat are we going to do in our situation?\u201d The book is called <em>The Painful Path of a Prodigal<\/em>. You can find it in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. Order it from us, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY to order. Again, the book is called <em>The Painful Path of a Prodigal<\/em> by Craig Svensson. Order from FamilyLifeToday.com online, or call 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, these weeks leading up to Thanksgiving and then to Christmas are times when, as families, we can be actively engaged in purposeful, intentional discipleship with our kids, to be talking this week about gratitude and thanksgiving, looking at Bible verses that deal with that. Then, after the Thanksgiving holiday is over, to start pointing them toward the spiritual realities that are, front and center, in the Christmas season. It\u2019s just a <em>great<\/em> time of year to be focusing with your kids on what really matters during these seasons. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFamilyLife has created a resource that\u2019s designed to help moms and dads engage with kids during the Christmas season\u2014twelve ornaments that can be hung on a Christmas tree\u2014each ornament depicting a different name or a different title for Jesus. It\u2019s called \u201cThe Twelve Names of Christmas<sup>\u2122<\/sup>.\u201d We want to make this resource available to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners, who can help support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> with a donation. Your donations make all that we do, here at FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, possible. Every time you donate, what you\u2019re doing is helping extend the reach of this ministry so we can reach more people, more often, with practical biblical help and hope. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you can make a donation today, go to FamilyLifeToday.com to donate online; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and ask for a set of \u201cThe Twelve Names of Christmas\u201d; we\u2019ll send that out to you. You can use that as a resource with your children or your grandchildren during the Christmas season. They\u2019ll love it, and we think you\u2019ll find it enjoyable as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to continue hearing from Craig Svensson about the very difficult season in their family\u2019s life when their son moved away from his faith and started making destructive choices. I hope you can join us as we continue the conversation.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our hosts, Dave and Ann Wilson, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2020 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:26:56"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["24.67M"],"filesize_raw":["25863373"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-306560.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-306560.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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Svensson walks us through his son Eric's painful journey with drugs and addiction. After taking several steps to stop Eric's drug use, Craig and his wife continued to pray that Eric could be rescued from this downward spiral.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/fl2020-11-18.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>When a son or a daughter starts heading in a direction different from the way he or she was raised, parents rightly become alarmed. Craig Svensson knows something about this; he was the father of a prodigal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>It\u2019s an incredible burden when you see your child making destructive choices, and it\u2019s very difficult to watch. It\u2019s so painful; you just want to try to get them on the right road. But you know, when you have a prodigal in your family, it is so absorbing that it\u2019s easy to neglect your other children; because so much time and energy has to be poured into a prodigal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Wednesday, November 18<sup>th<\/sup>. Our hosts are Dave and Ann Wilson; I'm Bob Lepine. You can find us online at FamilyLifeToday.com. What should parents do when a son or a daughter is starting to make destructive choices? I mean, beyond praying, what do we do? We\u2019ll talk more about that today. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. We are stepping into a subject that is going to be a pain point for a lot of our listeners, and it\u2019s a pain point to revisit some of what we\u2019re going to hear about today.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>It will be very relatable for many.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Yes; I mean, you can say one word and it evokes emotion: \u201cprodigal.\u201d Just say the word and you have a whole array of thoughts, and feelings, and emotions.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Craig Svensson is joining us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>; Craig, welcome to the program.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>It\u2019s a delight to be here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Craig lives in Indiana. He is a part\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>That means he\u2019s a Hoosier! I went to college in Indiana; I appreciate Hoosiers.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Speaking of college, Craig is on the faculty at Purdue University and teaches pharmacology; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Correct.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Craig has been married for 36 years, father of three. We\u2019re going to talk about one of your kids today, and about this chapter in your life and in your marriage, because you\u2019ve written a book called <em>The Painful Path of a Prodigal<\/em>. What we\u2019re talking about\u2014this painful experience\u2014is something that you and your wife never expected you would be going through but found yourself in the middle of about 15\/20 years ago; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Correct.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>When did you start to look at each other and say, \u201cWe have a child, who\u2019s not just acting out, but somebody who is strongly self-willed, who I\u2019m not sure how he\u2019s doing\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes; I would say probably that was late elementary school. You know, a prodigal doesn\u2019t become a prodigal overnight. There are serious heart issues there that develop over time. You have no idea where it\u2019s going to go when things start turning south; and obviously, it just causes your prayer to drive up.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor us, probably the big downturn started when our son Eric turned 15. That\u2019s when he began a very deep descent into drug abuse and all of its associated problems that come with that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So 12 to 15, what were you observing then that really was the bud that was not yet flowered as a prodigal?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>I think, first and foremost, it was an unwillingness to seek God and His will in his life and a rebellion against those things. It was issues that arose in school of not wanting to submit to authority, of acting out in school, of doing things that were obviously disruptive in the classroom and outside the classroom, getting into mischief. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you see a consistent pattern of that, then you begin to worry and say, \u201cAlright; this is more than just an occasional phenomenon. What\u2019s going on in his heart here?\u201d and struggling with him there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>You had had two older kids that you <em>didn\u2019t<\/em> see this going on?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes; certainly, our daughter, who was the closest to him, was probably the polar opposite of that, whose life experiences were so close in time\u2014and therefore, so much of what <em>they<\/em> experienced in terms of our parenting, what they experienced in our church, what they experienced in school was so identical\u2014because they\u2019re so close in age.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Do you think her compliance was a factor in his desire to be different\/to be his own person?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>No; I think it was his draw to sin. That\u2019s, ultimately, what it is when someone enters into rebellion; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>It is because they are drawn to sin rather than the things of God. Really, that\u2019s the natural path of us all; we have a sin nature. David said: \u201cBehold, I was born in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me,\u201d \u201cThe wicked go astray from the womb,\u201d we are told. The <em>real<\/em> remarkable thing is that anyone follows Jesus. The natural path is the path of rebellion, and it\u2019s only when God does a work of grace in the heart of a child that you see them going a different path.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What kinds of conversations were you having with your son in these early days, when there were behavior issues at school and you were trying to intervene and get him back on the right track? Was he responsive to what you were saying, or was he tuning you out?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>I think it probably varied with the day, you know. There were times when he would listen. We would certainly\/we had him involved in youth group\u2014and all those other activities\u2014very involved in Sunday school; he was also involved in extracurricular activities that you might think would build his character. We tried to spend some time through Proverbs with him, which is a <em>great<\/em> resource for parents to point children to what the natural consequences are of certain types of behavior.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCertainly, he saw those things; and you could see there was a struggle. I don\u2019t think, at that age, I would call him just open, full-borne rebellion. He would have his good times and his bad times. But we could tell that he struggled with self-control and being able not to respond in anger, or not taking advantage of a window of opportunity for mischief\u2014that he would seize it was his tendency.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>I think, as parents, we <em>all<\/em> go through stages with our kids. We\u2019re hoping and we\u2019re thinking, \u201cIs this just a stage?\u201d I think, because our kids go up and down and they\u2019re kind of all over the place, was there a point even that your wife thought, \u201cThis has gone on a little longer than we had anticipated\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>I think, for us, when we discovered him involved in drug use at the age of 15, that was a critical turning point. Literally, what happened is I walked outside of our garage and went to the side of the house. I was looking for him to call him for dinner; and he was at the side of the house, smoking a marijuana joint. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFirst of all, that was our <em>first<\/em> clear indication that he was using drugs. Secondly, I have enough of a background to know, when a kid is using drugs <em>alone<\/em> and in isolation, that\u2019s a <em>real<\/em> serious concern. Most drug use takes place in a social setting; but when you have a kid using a drug by himself, you know you have a very significant problem going on.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>What happened?\u2014you walk around and see him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>It was an interesting moment in his life; because, despite everything that was going on, he had an association with some detectives in the police force in our area. They actually used him, as a shopper, to go into convenience stores\/gas stations to try to buy cigarettes\u2014because he was 15, he was underage\u2014to see if they\u2019d card him. The police would take him, and he would go in; and if he came back out with cigarettes, then they went in and gave them a citation. He had this relationship with two police in our local police department.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Did you <em>know<\/em> that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Oh yes; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>I mean, obviously, they got our permission to be able to do that and everything.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>One of the first things we did is we called the police and talked to them about it\u2014not to arrest him\u2014but to say, \u201cI\u2019m not sure you want him doing this,\u201d and also, \u201cMaybe you would be good people to talk to him.\u201d They actually came and spent\u2014oh, I don\u2019t know; it was over an hour\u2014sitting at our picnic tables in the back, and talking with Eric, and trying to really show him the path that he was likely going down.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tObviously, he had to stop serving that role for them as a shopper; they didn\u2019t want someone like that. There were a couple of times, over the next year or so, that they reached out to him; and numerous people throughout his life, in the difficult times that he went through\u2014we\u2019re grateful for\u2014that reached out and tried to draw him back to a road that was not destructive.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>In the moment, when you walk out and see him smoking a joint, all of a sudden, this is taking you completely by surprise. Were you\/did you become angry? How did you process it, and how did you interact with him?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Well, I think there was a big moment of silence between the two of us; because we realized that a bridge had been crossed, me acknowledging\/seeing him. I just told him, \u201cCome on inside now.\u201d We sat down and I said, \u201cWhy don\u2019t you talk to Mom about what just happened?\u201d and let him converse in his own words that way.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Was there remorse on his part?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>I think remorse at getting <em>caught<\/em>, not remorse at what he had done.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Did your wife respond any different than you did, or\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>I think that her biggest response was disappointment; because again, it was just another step down the road, and realizing, \u201cThis is a really serious step, and what does that portend for the future?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Later that night, after he\u2019s gone to bed, and the two of you are lying side by side in bed, and going, \u201cWhat are we doing? Where do we go from here?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>\u201cWhat do we do next?\u201d That\u2019s <em>always<\/em> the challenge when you\u2019re asking a question about your child, who is clearly on a path: \u201cDo we need outside help? Where do we go? How seriously do we take this?\u201d Because at the same time, you can take a single instance and blow it up to something bigger than it really is. We wanted to be careful, thinking that through.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what really led us to call the police, whom he had worked with. We knew they needed to know anyway; but we thought, \u201cYou know, this is a good place. They\u2019ve obviously been down this road with other young people before; they\u2019ve been involved in interventions.\u201d We hoped that that would have been helpful for him to hear it from them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>\u2014and walking through the consequences of what this could lead to.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Did Eric respond, like, \u201cOkay; I made a mistake; I need to stop this,\u201d or did he\/was he defiant? What was his response?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>It was actually more placid than maybe I would have expected when that happened. He wasn\u2019t really particularly angry with us; he wasn\u2019t, \u201cNo; I don\u2019t want to go down that road anymore.\u201d It was just kind of placid\/more nonresponsive than anything else, to be honest with you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It sounds like\u2014I\u2019m thinking of a 15-year-old, who\u2019s been caught\u2014a placid response seems to me like, \u201cI have to figure out how to manage this better so that Mom and Dad aren\u2019t up in my grill,\u201d and \u201cClearly the side of the house is not the place to go if you want to smoke a joint.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDid he continue with what he was doing, <em>immediately<\/em>; do you think?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes, yes; in fact, much more depth very quickly. His drug use escalated, and problems at the school that he was at also escalated very rapidly. It came to a point, where the school was very concerned; and we were as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt that point in time, we had already done a little bit of counseling with him and realized something like that probably wasn\u2019t going to be enough. We decided that a more significant intervention was going to be necessary. We decided to put him into an explorer-type program\/an outward-bound kind of program, where it\u2019s a wilderness camp that you go, specifically for children that are going through serious rebellion\u2014it may or may not be drug use. We actually got permission from the school to have him leave early and go into that camp early.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe spent\/I guess it was a little bit more than three months in a camp like that in Canada. We put him into that environment to try to help him to come to make better decisions\/realize the path he was going. His anger issues were rising and getting more severe and more serious\u2014and also, to try to address those.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>He goes away for three months?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Were you talking to him?\u2014any communication?\u2014is he on his own?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Our communication was in writing; because they were in a pretty isolated area on an island, so you couldn\u2019t exactly escape, if you will. You couldn\u2019t get your telephone there or anything, but we would write back and forth. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHis letters were mixed. He didn\u2019t go fighting\/he didn\u2019t fight it. He went\/I guess I would say resigned to: \u201cThis is what\u2019s going to happen.\u201d He realized he was getting in more and more difficulty in school and that that path wasn\u2019t going very well either. He went, fairly resigned, to this kind of intervention.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You said his drug use had escalated; he\u2019d gone from marijuana into other drugs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>At that point in time, we\u2019re not sure that he used other drugs, but he just used marijuana much more.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>The group he was hanging out with\u2014I guess was a group that this was what their lives were all about.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Did you think about: \u201cWe have to pull him out of school,\u201d \u201cWe have to transplant him somewhere else, getting him away from this contagion group that he\u2019s a part of\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes; we did certainly think about that. That\u2019s not really easy to do, as you can imagine. You can\u2019t just pick your kid up and go to another school. Because of his difficulties, a lot of schools, obviously, would not take him. A lot of private Christian schools, for examples, wouldn\u2019t take a kid who\u2019s getting in trouble. At the time, he was in a public school.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat happened at that time, though, the Lord just seemed to open the door for when he came out of the residential program for us to change environments completely. We actually, when he went off to this camp, we put our house up for sale. We were living in a suburb north of Detroit; and we were going to move to the west, figuring to get him in a completely different school system\/a different environment; but yet, it was close enough for me to still get back and forth to the university.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe did that; and in the midst of that, another university approached me and said, \u201cHey, we\u2019d like you to consider coming to our university, and to make a move, and come be with us.\u201d They wanted me to be a division head and stuff. It seemed like the Lord was opening a door\u2014right?\u2014to be able to, when he came out of that camp, <em>completely<\/em> change his environment. We, literally, moved a week after he got out of camp and moved to Iowa, where I took a position at the University of Iowa, thinking, \u201cThis will be a really good chance for a start.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe people in our church were wonderfully supportive and praying for us. Everybody around us said, \u201cBoy, this seems like God is really doing a great work here, opening a door to <em>completely<\/em> change Eric\u2019s environment when he comes back.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Talk about the people in your church; because here you guys are, active in a local church; all your friends are church folks. When your kid\u2019s going off to an outward-bound program\u2014because he\u2019s using\/substance abuse\u2014this is the kind of thing you don\u2019t want to talk to friends at church about, or it\u2019s not comfortable to talk to friends at church about.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Yes, and I was actually serving as the interim preacher for this church.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>They were looking for a pastor, and I served as their interim for three years. It also presented a challenge: \u201cShould I step down in this role at this moment?\u201d I wasn\u2019t\u2014I used the term,\u201d interim preacher\u201d\u2014because of Eric\u2019s rebellion, I wasn\u2019t willing to take on a position of ruling authority\u2014so I wasn\u2019t the interim pastor. They had a group of elders, and the elders fulfilled the roles that you would think of for an elder. My role was really just to do the preaching; and I would do baptisms, and communion, and other types of things that were in the public\/a ceremony and leading in those. It was a particular challenge whether my role should change because of what he was going through. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can say that, overall in that church, the support of the people was, for the most part, wonderful.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Everybody <em>knew<\/em> what was going on with Eric?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Oh, I don\u2019t know if <em>everybody<\/em> knew; but people recognized, and it was pretty well known\u2014and certainly, the elders did\u2014because as things were evolving, I met the elders and said, \u201cHey, this is the situation. Maybe you ought to think about having somebody else step in this role.\u201d They said, \u201cNo, no; as long as you feel like you can do it, we want you to stay there and continue to do that role.\u201d I would say the elders and key people in the church were just very supportive and very helpful to us at times.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hadn\u2019t always experienced that at a previous church we were at, when Eric\u2019s rebellion was really starting. We experienced our share of being judged by others because of his rebellion.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>I\u2019m thinking about your wife\u2014as you guys are lying in bed at night, praying for, I\u2019m sure, your son\u2014but the emotional highs and lows\u2014your fear of: \u201cWhat could this lead to?\u201d but then the hope of: \u201cOkay, he\u2019s getting help,\u201d \u201cThis is going better,\u201d \u201cI\u2019m hoping that God\u2019s going to grab his heart.\u201d What did that look like for you guys? As a woman, I carry that <em>constantly<\/em>; and I\u2019m guessing your wife did too.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>She certainly did, and it\u2019s an incredible burden when you see your child making destructive choices. It\u2019s very difficult to watch; it\u2019s so painful. You just want to try to get them on the right road, but you know that God has to do the work in their heart. It drives you to your knees in prayer; and you plead with God again, and again, and again, and just ask Him to intervene.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe were grateful that there were some men who also recognized and tried to pour themselves into Eric\/sought to be a mentor. As you know, sometimes a child gets to a point, where they don\u2019t want to listen to mom and dad anymore; right? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>One of the beauties of the body of Christ is that there are others, who they may have relationships with, who can come surround them and try to support him. We had some of that; and we\u2019re very, very grateful for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>Were your other kids involved at all, wondering and asking you questions?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Well, our daughter was the only one that was living at home, and I wouldn\u2019t say she gave us advice on what she\u2019d do. She, obviously, was concerned about her brother. But one thing I\u2019ll tell you I wish that I had been more sensitive, early on, about was just how much it was impacting her life. I think, when you have a prodigal in your family, it is so absorbing that it\u2019s easy to neglect your other children; because so much time and energy has to be poured into a prodigal that you can forget about how it\u2019s impacting their lives. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCertainly, it made a difference about her wanting to have other people over at the house; because she didn\u2019t know how he would act out and what he would do. It was embarrassing to her at school; because she had a brother, who others knew was going off in this very dangerous direction. She had her own struggles\u2014I don\u2019t want to speak for what her feelings were about that\u2014but we recognize that: \u201cThis is a trial for her,\u201d\u2014not just for the parents\u2014\u201cThis is a trial for her.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>How about for your own marriage? I know in our home, when there\u2019s something going on with our kids\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>I blame Dave! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Ann will blame me; I\u2019ll blame her. I mean, there\u2019s just tension\u2014even if we agree, still there\u2019s this big thing going on\u2014and there\u2019s pressure; so it affects our marriage. How was it affecting yours?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>I can remember being in bed at night, and I\u2019m saying to Dave, \u201cSo-and-so is not in a good place. I\u2019m worried about what he\u2019s doing right now, out with his friends.\u201d Then Dave would say, \u201cHe\u2019s a <em>great<\/em> kid! He\u2019s not doing anything!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>And she was always right\u2014because he was\u2014that\u2019s a sort of smile moment in our marriage; but there were <em>tense<\/em> moments\/disagreements about what we should do: \u201cHow do we handle this?\u201d Was there any of that going on?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Craig: <\/strong>Well, certainly, there\u2019s a tension that gets created. I think, as he went deeper and deeper into drug use and all the consequences, that tension is only greater; because you\u2019re living with this fear of what\u2019s going to happen next. Fortunately, we more leaned into one another than leaned away from one another. We were mostly of one mind. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut there\u2019s no question that a prodigal is going to bring a tremendous amount of tension into a marriage. It\u2019s why one of the priorities, when you\u2019re walking this kind of trial, is to make sure you\u2019re building on your marriage; because it\u2019s going to be stressed by having a prodigal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the things that\u2019s so important is that you come to an understanding that\u2014you may not always agree on what should be done\u2014but you have to agree on what <em>will be<\/em> done, and you have to speak with one voice. There were times when we might not agree with something that my son had asked\/something he wanted, whether we should help him here, let him do this, et cetera. There were times I would say to my wife, \u201cOkay; I don\u2019t agree, but we\u2019ll do what you said. I\u2019ll trust your motherly instincts on this one.\u201d There were other times, maybe I would feel strongly, and we would do what I would say; but we would always present a united front.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne reality is that prodigal children can really drive a wedge between a husband and a wife, trying to get what they want. I mean, we\u2019ve all experienced that with little kids. A little kid comes up, \u201cWell, Mommy said I could\u2026\u201d Well, Mommy didn\u2019t really say that; right? When they get older, they can become very skilled at playing parents off of one another to get what they want. It\u2019s hard to think of your children acting that way, but they do; and you have to be aware of that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe worked hard to make sure we always had a unified voice\/we would have one voice: \u201cThis is what we\u2019ve decided.\u201d We would <em>never<\/em> share that, \u201cWell, I don\u2019t really agree with what Mom\u201d or \u201c\u2026what Dad says.\u201d You <em>never<\/em> want to go there and give them a tool to be able to drive a wedge between you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>One of the things we say at the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, actually on Friday night, as we\u2019re stepping into the weekend with married couples and pre-married couples, is \u201cFive Threats to Your Oneness.\u201d Every marriage is headed toward isolation or oneness. I don\u2019t know which threat it is, Bob\u2014I\u2019ve only done this for 30 years\u2014I don\u2019t even know how we say it, but it\u2019s basically that adversity or trials\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014inevitable difficulties.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>\u2014inevitable difficulties are going to come into your marriage. I always say this: \u201cTrials will make you better or bitter. The choice is yours.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe all know couples\/we know families that have become bitter, even maybe broken up the family for whatever\u2014could be a prodigal\u2014and then we know others that, when through the same thing, they seem to be better. They made a choice to somehow say, \u201cGod can use this, as horrible as it is, for <em>better<\/em> in our life. We can actually become more mature.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt sounds like, as horrible as this was, you still fought to make sure your marriage and your family became better.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I hope every parent, who\u2019s listening, who may be in the middle of this, is hearing what you\u2019re saying about pouring into your marriage; and about being on the same page and presenting a united front; and about making a decision, early on, in this journey, \u201cLook, if we\u2019re going to get through this, we have to get through it together. We\u2019re both in a hard spot, neither of us knows <em>exactly<\/em> the right thing to do; we wish we did.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think part of that journey may involve getting a copy of Craig\u2019s book and reading through it together, and asking each other, \u201cWhat are we going to do in our situation?\u201d The book is called <em>The Painful Path of a Prodigal<\/em>. You can find it in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. Order it from us, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY to order. Again, the book is called <em>The Painful Path of a Prodigal<\/em> by Craig Svensson. Order from FamilyLifeToday.com online, or call 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, these weeks leading up to Thanksgiving and then to Christmas are times when, as families, we can be actively engaged in purposeful, intentional discipleship with our kids, to be talking this week about gratitude and thanksgiving, looking at Bible verses that deal with that. Then, after the Thanksgiving holiday is over, to start pointing them toward the spiritual realities that are, front and center, in the Christmas season. It\u2019s just a <em>great<\/em> time of year to be focusing with your kids on what really matters during these seasons. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFamilyLife has created a resource that\u2019s designed to help moms and dads engage with kids during the Christmas season\u2014twelve ornaments that can be hung on a Christmas tree\u2014each ornament depicting a different name or a different title for Jesus. It\u2019s called \u201cThe Twelve Names of Christmas<sup>\u2122<\/sup>.\u201d We want to make this resource available to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners, who can help support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> with a donation. Your donations make all that we do, here at FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, possible. Every time you donate, what you\u2019re doing is helping extend the reach of this ministry so we can reach more people, more often, with practical biblical help and hope. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you can make a donation today, go to FamilyLifeToday.com to donate online; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and ask for a set of \u201cThe Twelve Names of Christmas\u201d; we\u2019ll send that out to you. You can use that as a resource with your children or your grandchildren during the Christmas season. They\u2019ll love it, and we think you\u2019ll find it enjoyable as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to continue hearing from Craig Svensson about the very difficult season in their family\u2019s life when their son moved away from his faith and started making destructive choices. I hope you can join us as we continue the conversation.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our hosts, Dave and Ann Wilson, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2020 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/306560","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=306560"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=306560"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=306560"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=306560"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=306560"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=306560"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=306560"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}