{"id":306524,"date":"2020-11-05T07:01:06","date_gmt":"2020-11-05T12:01:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/the-role-of-a-grandparent\/"},"modified":"2020-11-05T07:01:06","modified_gmt":"2020-11-05T12:01:06","slug":"the-role-of-a-grandparent","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/the-role-of-a-grandparent\/","title":{"rendered":"The Role of a Grandparent"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Studies show that grandparents are the second most important influence in a child&#8217;s life, according to Josh Mulvihill and his wife, Jen. Not only can they be a great support to weary parents, but their goal is to see their faith passed on to successive generations.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/mp3.familylife.com\/fl2020-11-05.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:25:13","filesize":"23.09M","filesize_raw":"24212008","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2833,10379],"tags":[6962],"podcast_series":[8406],"cwp_profile":[9670],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-306524","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-godly-legacy","category-grandparents","tag-raising-godly-kids","podcast_series-discipling-your-grandchildren","cwp_profile-josh-and-jen-mulvihill","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/306524\/the-role-of-a-grandparent","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/306524\/the-role-of-a-grandparent","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"bMJ5ESbGyR\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/the-role-of-a-grandparent\/\">The Role of a Grandparent<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/the-role-of-a-grandparent\/embed\/#?secret=bMJ5ESbGyR\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;The Role of a Grandparent&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"bMJ5ESbGyR\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg",508,508,false]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"kfairris@familylife.com","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/kfairrisfamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"Studies show that grandparents are the second most important influence in a child's life, according to Josh Mulvihill and his wife, Jen. Not only can they be a great support to weary parents, but their goal is to see their faith passed on to successive generations.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/fl2020-11-05.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>If someone asked you, \u201cWhat does the Bible say about grandparenting?\u201d what passage would come to mind? Josh Mulvihill says there's a familiar passage that a lot of grandparents overlook.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh: <\/strong>Most have heard of Deuteronomy 6\u2014probably the most common passage that we think of with discipleship\u2014most of us start with verse 4; it actually starts in verses 1 and 2. It says that these commands are for <em>you<\/em>, your son, and your son's son. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDeuteronomy 6\u2014often thought of as only a parenting passage\u2014it is a grand-parenting passage as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Thursday, November 5<sup>th<\/sup>. Our hosts are Dave and Ann Wilson; I'm Bob Lepine. You can find us online at FamilyLifeToday.com. What is our responsibility, as grandparents, to help mold, shape, influence future generations? We'll talk more about that today. Stay with us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWelcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. I don't know if this is your <em>favorite<\/em> subject, but it's pretty close to one of your favorite subjects.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>It's a pretty great subject. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes; when is your new grandbaby being born? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>December.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Alright. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>That will be number six. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And you've been on the journey\u2014your oldest is six years old?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Six years old.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We've got nine grandkids and our oldest\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Quit bragging; you just one-upped us. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>I know; he wanted to talk about <em>his<\/em> grandkids. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Just demonstrating that I'm older than you are. [Laughter] And that's why we're a little ahead of you on the race on this. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGrandparenting is something that, I think, takes some of us by surprise. Parenting\u2014you have nine months to get ready for\u2014you read the books. Grandparenting\u2014you hear from your kids that they're having a baby and then the baby arrives\u2014and it never really dawns on you: \u201cOh, we have a <em>job<\/em> to do here\u201d; right? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>And it's a fun job. It's interesting\u2014I don't know if Dave loves that I do this\u2014but when our kids call and say, \u201cHey, could you watch\u2026\u201d, I drop <em>everything<\/em>; and the answer is, \u201cOf course.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>The answer is <em>never<\/em> \u201cNo.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>One of our sons called us about three weeks ago and said, \u201cHey, can we come over on this weekend and stay with you guys?\u201d And we said, \u201cSure; we're looking forward to it.\u201d The next day, Mary Ann was coming to me and saying, \u201cHere's what I'm thinking we'll eat while they're here...\u201d She's starting to map out the menu; right? And then about two weeks later, they called and said, \u201cOh, we forgot we've got this going on; and we're not going to be able to come.\u201d There was mild depression at my home with that news. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>You know what we just did? We made a grandkids\u2019 room. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014in your house?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Well, we took the\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> We took our boys' bedroom\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>All three boys used to be in one room, and we just transformed it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>It's got a little tent in there and Christmas lights hanging. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u2014bunk beds. It's pretty amazing. Every time I've been talking to my grandkids recently, they say, \u201cShow us the grandkids\u2019 room.\u201d They want to see it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I don't know how many of our listeners are even aware of this; but back about five years ago, there was a movement that began\u2014a national grandparenting movement\u2014the first National Grandparenting Conference happened in 2016. That has continued to happen over the years. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the people responsible for making that happen joined us on <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>a few years ago, and he's back with us again today. Josh Mulvihill is here; Josh, welcome. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh:<\/strong> Great to be here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This time Josh brought the secret weapon. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>Woo hoo! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh: <\/strong>You know it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Jen is with him! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen: <\/strong>Thanks for having us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>I think it's Jen Pen. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen:<\/strong> Jenny Penny. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>Jenny Penny! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Josh helps give leadership to the Christian Grandparent Network, and he's written on this subject. In fact, his newest book is called <em>Discipling Your Grandchildren.<\/em> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou guys aren\u2019t grandparents; you're too young to be grandparents. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh: <\/strong>Not grandparents.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen: <\/strong>Not yet. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>In God's grace, you will be grandparents one day. But, this passion for you came out of studying the Scriptures; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh:<\/strong> Yes, yes. Family discipleship: as a pastor for about 20 years, I saw the impact of the family\u2014or the lack of impact of family discipleship\u2014and went back to become a better pastor to help train parents in my understanding. God expanded that vision to include grandparents. Here we are, many years later, and God has opened doors and helped understand the immense <em>value<\/em> that grandparents have and the significant need that is out there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere's literally, probably somewhere around 30 million Christian grandparents in America. When we started this many years ago, there were very, very few resources. We saw a need and figured, \u201cGod spoke through a donkey, so He could speak through us.\u201d [Laughter] So yes, we just try to be the messenger and help individuals understand what God's Word says about their role.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Was there an \u201cAha\u201d moment for you in your study of Scripture, where you went, \u201cOh, grand-parenting's a big deal\u201d? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>It's not something we all think about. You know, all those verses on grandparenting\u2014[Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>\u2014you know, most people couldn't even think of one. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh:<\/strong> Well, Ann, that's right; because the word, \u201cgrandparent,\u201d really isn't used often as a word in Scripture\u2014just a couple of times. But when we start looking at all the other uses of the word, \u201cgrandparent,\u201d in Scripture\u2014such as children's children, and son's son, and father's father\u2014when we <em>know<\/em> the terms and we start to look for them, we go, \u201cWow; it is <em>all<\/em> over God's Word.\u201d It's there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe big\u2014you asked: \u201cWhat's one of the big passages for me?\u201d\u2014my favorite is \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPsalm 78. It talks about the goal that we're trying to see\u2014our faith passed on to the next generation\u2014it really gets at then, some of the key ways to do that\/some of the \u201chow tos.\u201d God's not silent on either the \u201cwhat\u201d or the \u201chow to.\u201d I think we'll hit on both of those here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Jen, you were in the midst of raising toddlers when your husband was starting to focus on grandparenting. Did you feel a little disoriented with what he was discovering? Were you able to engage with what he was writing about and speaking about?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen: <\/strong>Oh, absolutely. As soon as he started talking about the topic of grandparenting, I was <em>very<\/em> excited about it, having seen our own parents be engaged with our children and what that has looked like.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnn, you just mentioned, \u201cI have a room for my grandkids at my house.\u201d You know, my mom did that from the minute she found out we were expecting our first: hands on\/excited to disciple the children.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYes, I was very excited just to see what doors God would open and see how it would impact families, our own family included. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Yes; you mentioned Psalm 78; and you know, I pulled it right up. I'm thinking, \u201cThere's something that jumped off the page for <em>you<\/em>\u201d; so talk to us about Psalm 78<em>.<\/em> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh: <\/strong>Yes, verse 4 says: \u201cWe will not hide them from their children, but tell to the coming generation.\u201d That's one of the \u201chow tos\u201d\u2014the telling is pretty important; it gets out our testimony as parents and grandparents. And notice\u2014we're not the point\u2014we're the pointer, pointing to something beyond ourselves. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou'll hear a lot in grandparent literature about telling your story and your history\u2014and that's a good thing; nothing wrong with that\u2014but that's not the end goal. \u201cSo what's the end goal?\u201d It goes here further: \u201cTell the glorious deeds of the Lord and His might and the wonders He's done.\u201d What this really gets at here\u2014our children\/our grandchildren\u2014they're going to worship a god; and it's going to be a small \u201cg\u201d god: a replacement\/an idol\u2014if the true God is not embraced by them\/if they see some other god as more great, and grand, and glorious than the true God. One of the things that God has given us is to tell our testimony, pointing to who He is, His nature, and His character to help them grasp who He is. Then He continues: \u201cHe's established a testimony in Jacob.\u201d He's done so in every grandparent [who is a believer]. There's a \u201chow to,\u201d grandparent. If you haven't told your testimony, God wants to use that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cHe's appointed a law in Israel, which He commanded our fathers,\u201d\u2014and this is where one of the little antennae goes up for grandfathers and grandparents; that word, \u201cfathers,\u201d means forefathers. But there's your second \u201chow to\u201d\u2014that we are to teach their children that the next generation might know them\/the children yet unborn. If we keep reading, it goes into four generations: \u201cAnd arise and tell them to their children; so that they should set their hope in God, and not forget the works of God, but keep His commandments.\u201d We've got literally four generations there\u2014that's what?\u2014I don't know: is it a hundred-and-sixty year vision\/a hundred-and-twenty year vision? It's not just about grandkids; it's about great-grandkids. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe see here the \u201cso that\u201d tells us why we do all the how-to stuff: \u201chope in God\u201d; that's salvation language and obedience of God. This is where the discipleship comes out of this. We see this idea that\u2014I think of the Great Commission when I see this phrase\u2014\u201cthat they should not forget the works of God, but keep His commandments.\u201d I make a beeline right to the New Testamentthere\u2014\u201cteach them to obey all I have commanded\u201d\u2014and that's where we get discipleship, here, as parents and grandparents. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You keep reading in this Psalm, and it gets to the forgetfulness of the generations. The reason for all of this is because we are prone to wander\/prone to forget. If grandparents don't do their job, the future generations can become disconnected from the spiritual heritage that has been a part of a family or a part of the grandparent's life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you're first generation, as a Christian, you may not be able to talk about your lineage of faith; but you can talk about the foundation of your family's faith in the stake you put in the ground and said, \u201cWe're going in a different direction.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>But Bob, this can get kind of tricky; because as a grandparent, maybe your faith is super strong and you're <em>excited<\/em> about it; but your kids aren't on the same page, spiritually. How do we navigate that? Do we need to ask permission if we can talk to our grandkids about God?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh: <\/strong>I like to talk about grandparenting with our generation. We're in our 40s. If you're not a grandparent, and you're listening in, you have a significant role; and part of that is as a gatekeeper. Since God's given grandparents a role, it's not pleasing to the Lord not to allow grandparents to engage in the way that God has designed them. That's where the gatekeeping comes in. Adult children: \u201cWe need to open the gate to grandparents.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tObviously, there's a lot of dynamics at play in relationships, so that's a generalization there. But as far as whether it's the grandparents or adult children\u2014whether you get one that's walking with the Lord and one that's not\u2014I think the challenge there is simply one that you've got two unequally-yoked groups. Obviously, you're going to be on different planes. In that case, a lot of it comes down to maintaining and building relationship. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think the best thing\u2014and it sounds so simplistic, but it is God's answer\u2014is simply in prayer and in changing hearts. You can't walk in lock step with somebody who's seeing the world completely different. If we get into the prodigal realm\u2014which this starts moving into\u2014God had a lot of prodigals Himself, so it's nothing new to Him. The Bible's not silent about that. Maybe some of our listeners were that themselves, and came back home, provides some significant hope.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut in that instance, I look at the gospel. It is both our map and our mirror when there's a prodigal in our life. We do with our children and our family as God did with the own prodigals He had. Jesus ate with sinners; we can too. Jesus continued to reach out in compassion and love, even when that wasn't reciprocated. There's so many principles we could tease out of Scripture and how the gospel impacts relationships like that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen that's a hard scenario. I think probably about 50 percent of most audiences that listen to us, when we ask, \u201cHow many of you have a prodigal child?\u2014a prodigal grandchild?\u201d At least\u2014I've never actually had an audience, where less than 50 percent hasn't raised their hand\u2014<em>ever<\/em>. I've been doing this for about ten years, and so it's common. I think prayer is the answer. We can go to the Lord, and He changes hearts. We do that to the throne as long as we need to and invite others to join us in that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>I find it interesting, as you go back to Psalm 78\u2014I mean, much of it\u2014it's a long Psalm; you know it ends in 72 verses\u2014much of after what you read is about the rebellion of Israel. And then, at the very end, it talks about David. You can apply this to a grandparent\/granddad or [grand]mom\u2014it says, \u201cWith upright heart, he shepherded them and guided them with his skillful hand.\u201d As I read it now, with you two sitting here, talking about this topic, I'm like, \u201cThat's my call, as a grandpa,\u201d\u2014they call me \u201cPoppy\u201d\u2014that is my call: \u201cI'm, with upright heart\u2026\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI mean, so it's sort of talking about a prodigal here as well. But whether prodigal or not, it's easy for a grandparent to step back and think, \u201cWell, it's not my job anymore; it's the parents\u2019.\u201d And yet, He's saying, \u201cNo, no, no; with upright heart, skillfully guide.\u201d And like Bob said, you know, the forgetfulness\u2014we are the connection, through the generations, to say: \u201cLet's remember. Never forget what God did.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe're first-generation Christians, and so we had a mission: \u201cChange the Wilson name\/change the Wilson legacy from adultery and alcohol to a different thing.\u201d It's now going through our grandkids; and it's like: \u201cThat's my job\/that's our job. It's our call!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I think it's so important what you said: \u201cGrandparents, who have a burden for their grandkids to know Christ,\u201d\u2014we can become so focused on that, that we think, \u201cEvery time I talk to them, I've got to be reading Bible verses or I've got to be doing that.\u201d [Laughter] To build a relationship with your grandkids\u2014and build a strong solid relationship\u2014that's going to be the bridge that is going to enable those conversations. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey're going to be initiating those conversations with <em>you<\/em>. They get into their teen years, they're going to be saying: \u201cSo tell me about when you went to college,\u201d \u201cTell me about when you were a little girl.\u201d Those are the conversations, where you can comfortably\/naturally share your testimony and talk about God's work in your life, as long as the relationship is solid there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI'm starting to think about some of the relationship markers that we need to be anticipating. I remember talking to a grandfather, who said: \u201cWe have a Bar-Mitzvah event for our grandkids. When a grandchild turns 13, they get to go on a trip for 7 days with grandpa, anywhere in the world they want to go,\u201d\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>Oooh!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014okay?\u2014\u201cSo they [child] pick the city, and we'll take them.\u201d I mean, that's a big deal; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It costs a lot of money; but this grandfather says: \u201cIf I'm going to invest, that's what I want to invest in. So at age ten, we say, \u2018Start thinking about where you're going to want to go when you turn thirteen,\u2019\u201d\u2014start building some anticipation for that. Of course, the grandfather is thinking\u2014not just about the rides at Disney World<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, or the Eiffel Tower, or wherever you may be going\u2014he's thinking about seven days of relationship, and spiritual deposits, and conversations\/what he's going to get to have with his grandkids. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>I'm going to do that. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen: <\/strong>Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But Ann is going to go to her grandkids and say, \u201cVenice; you should check out Venice.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>I've already told Olive\u2014that's our oldest grandchild\/our oldest granddaughter\u2014I said, \u201cOlive, let's travel the world together someday.\u201d She sits and dreams with me\u2014like, \u201cWhere should we go?\u201d I've already prepped her. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>I just need to get the money onboard with that. [Laughter] I don't think it has to be around the world\u2014it could be somewhere simple\u2014but somewhere that they would love. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> If your budget is a restrictive budget, then you say, \u201cLet's plan a week together, and you pick the state park we want to go to.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>Exactly; right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>The kids aren't as focused\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>It doesn't matter as much to them. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014that's right; that's right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJosh, walk us through\/you map out for us in the book: \u201cWhat are the responsibilities\/what are the characteristics of a grandparent, who wants to make disciples of his grandkids?\u201d Kind of give us that road map; can you do that? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh: <\/strong>Yes; most have heard of Deuteronomy 6\u2014probably the most common passage that we think of with discipleship\u2014most of us start with verse 4; it actually starts in verses 1 and 2. It says that these commands are for <em>you<\/em>, your son, and your son's son. Deuteronomy 6\u2014often thought of as only a parenting passage\u2014it is a grand-parenting passage as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen we think about some of the characteristics, I'm just going to read you a couple that really jumped out to me in my study of Scripture. Psalm 128:6 says: \u201cMay you see your children's children.\u201d That's just one example of how the Bible talks about the <em>blessing<\/em> of grandchildren, which is significant, simply because our world often sees children, in general, just not as blessings today but as burdens\u2014not only the cost factor\/you've probably seen the financial expense of a child\u2014but also the time factor. With grandparents, it's often a lifestyle impact as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat we have found is that, often, grandparents see, specifically\u2014grandparents in general\u2014or a specific grandchild as a burden. One of the conversations we often have with grandparents is regarding the idea of: \u201cNot only are <em>you<\/em> a blessing to your grandchildren, but your grandchildren are a huge blessing to you,\u201d\u2014so that's one.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA second characteristic of a disciple-making grandparent is simply understanding the purpose which God has created grandparents for. There's been some studies that have found that grandparents are the second greatest influence in the life of children. Many think\/most know parents are number one, but we\u2019ll often jump to something else as number two, whether that's peers, or\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014the teacher, the coach, pastor. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh: <\/strong>\u2014pastor; yes\u2014you know, whatever it is\/whatever the study is.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>\u2014social media. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>Yes! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>I mean, that's got to be tough. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh: <\/strong>Lots of things.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen: <\/strong>So many influences. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>So you're saying there's a <em>purpose<\/em> for a grandparent. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh: <\/strong>Absolutely a purpose; yes. God designed it for a purpose. We see now, more than ever, the great need that children have to have godly influences in their life\u2014not just parents but also other ones, whether that's\u2014God's built in grandparents for that; He's built in the church for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe have five kids, and we want as many godly influences in our kids' lives as possible. For Jen and me, our mothers both died. Jen's mom died of brain cancer; mine, ALS. They really didn't have a <em>huge<\/em> relationship with their grandmothers; most didn't even know them. Of course, that changes your family dynamics when mom steps out. We've, in a sense, had this little taste of what it's like not to have the godly influence to the same degree that God designed it, due to death. It's a loss for us; you feel the weight of parenting in a greater capacity, because grandparents aren't there. In part, you know, grandparents, I think in God's design, are there to support, and help, and share the weight, and another voice, and another influence. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, that's in the perfect world; right?\u2014where there's a two-parent family\/mom and dad, where there's grandparents that love the Lord. There are those; we find that's about 25 percent of families. If you're in that 25\u2014if you're listening, and you're in the \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t25 percent category\u2014consider yourself <em>blessed<\/em>. And if you're not, grandparents come in, oftentimes, as the last line of defense\u2014or the support figures\u2014that then end up bringing in\/supplementing what is lost from mom and dad and part of God's design for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>You know, it's interesting when you say that\u2014I mean, I hadn't thought about this in a long time\u2014but I thought of <em>my<\/em> grandparents. You know, mom and dad were divorced when I was seven\u2014never really\/I think I met them one time\u2014my dad's parents\u2014because he was pretty much out of my life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut as I think about my mom's parents\/my grandparents\u2014they were <em>safety<\/em> for me\u2014as I look back. I mean, I was looking at the purpose in <em>my<\/em> life for them was, when I went to Leland and Hallie's house, I felt like it was <em>safe<\/em>. And you know, thinking back, because there\u2019s trauma I was going through\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>\u2014and you had a brother die. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> \u2014yes, a brother died the same year\u2014so that. I can remember walking in there; and it felt like, \u201cAaah!\u201d; I don't think I felt like that anywhere in my life. And yet, Grandma and Grandpa\u2014I wanted to be there <em>all<\/em> the time. Now I know <em>why<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen: <\/strong>Yes; there's a word for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>That was sort of God's purpose for them in my life\u2014to give me a stability that would be a foundation\u2014that my mom really wasn't able to give me, but my grandparents gave me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen: <\/strong>Yes; and I'm sure your mom appreciated that relationship.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen: <\/strong>I'm sure she appreciated that support, and that extra voice that was speaking into you, and that \u201cexhale\u201d for her\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen: <\/strong>\u2014in your grandparent's home. Praise the Lord for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>She actually ended up moving <em>back<\/em> to her parents, so that they could help her\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann: <\/strong>\u2014with the kids. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave: <\/strong>Great purpose. I\u2014you know, you think\/sit here, thinking\u2014you know, obviously, generations later: \u201cDid my grandma know that?\u201d\u2014yes; I guarantee you. She lived on purpose for this little boy. I mean, what a call, grandparents, you have. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jen: <\/strong>Yes; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is where we have to recognize, again, it kind of took us by surprise. We'd always thought of grandparenting as that nice chapter that's going to be full of sweet memories. You know, I've seen the bumper stickers that say, \u201cWe're spending our grandkids' inheritance\u201d on the back of the RV. [Laughter] Or you see grandparents, who will say, \u201cIf I had known grandparenting was this great, I'd have had grandkids first\u201d; right?\u2014all of those kind of fun sweet moments. But we have to be intentional, and not just sentimental, about grandparenting; because the Bible calls us to real intentionality. That's your heartbeat in all of this.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Josh: <\/strong>Yes; absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And it's the heartbeat of the book, <em>Discipling Your Grandchildren,<\/em> which is a book that we've got in our <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>Resource Center. You can go online at FamilyLifeToday.com to get Josh's book, <em>Discipling Your Grandchildren: Great Ideas to Help Them Know, Love, and Serve God.<\/em> Order, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call us if you'd like to order by phone: 1-800-FL-TODAY is the number\u20141-800-358-6329\u2014that's 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me just say a word to parents about our responsibilities, as parents, to disciple our kids. We talked this week with Adam Griffin, who has written a book called <em>Family Discipleship<\/em>. We think what Adam has outlined is so helpful\/so practical for moms and dads to know how to engage with their kids to talk about spiritual issues\/to help create spiritual formation in the lives of your kids. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe're making Adam's book available this week to anyone who can support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife <\/em>with a donation. Adam co-wrote this book with Pastor Matt Chandler. Again, the title of the book is<em> Family Discipleship.<\/em> It's our thank-you gift when you go online at FamilyLifeToday.com to make a donation or when you call 1-800-FL-TODAY. Your donations to <em>FamilyLife <\/em>are the lifeblood of this ministry. We are able to reach more people, more often, thanks to your ongoing support for this ministry. We're so grateful. Again, go to FamilyLifeToday.com to donate; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY, and be sure to ask for your copy of the book, <em>Family Discipleship<\/em>, as our thank-you gift. We look forward to getting a copy out to you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you can join us, again, tomorrow, especially if you're a grandparent. We're going to continue our conversation about discipling grandchildren with Josh and Jen Mulvihill. I hope you can be back with us then as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our hosts, Dave and Ann Wilson, I'm Bob Lepine. We'll see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2020 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/306524","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=306524"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=306524"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=306524"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=306524"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=306524"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=306524"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=306524"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}