{"id":306324,"date":"2020-08-12T07:00:05","date_gmt":"2020-08-12T11:00:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/childhood-is-only-for-a-season\/"},"modified":"2020-08-12T07:00:05","modified_gmt":"2020-08-12T11:00:05","slug":"childhood-is-only-for-a-season","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/childhood-is-only-for-a-season\/","title":{"rendered":"Childhood Is Only for a Season"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Is your son ready for the real world? Vicki Courtney advises moms to encourage their sons toward independence and responsibility so they will be eager to leave home when it&#8217;s time.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/mp3.familylife.com\/fl2020-08-12.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:28:26","filesize":"26.03M","filesize_raw":"27298883","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2838,2835],"tags":[6929],"podcast_series":[8382],"cwp_profile":[8996],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-306324","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-mothers","category-raising-boys","tag-raising-a-son","podcast_series-five-conversations-you-must-have-with-your-son","cwp_profile-vicki-courtney","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/306324\/childhood-is-only-for-a-season","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/306324\/childhood-is-only-for-a-season","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"INtm7aonJc\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/childhood-is-only-for-a-season\/\">Childhood Is Only for a Season<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/childhood-is-only-for-a-season\/embed\/#?secret=INtm7aonJc\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Childhood Is Only for a Season&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"INtm7aonJc\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/fl2020-08-12.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/mp3.familylife.com\/fl2020-08-12.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vicki:<\/strong> Yes, we could go on and on. And of course, we walked a mile in the snow to school; right? [Laughter] We all did that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, I, just this morning, read an article; it talked about parents tracking their college students to the point that there\u2019s this Life360 app. Students joke about it; but they\u2019re now holding college tuition over their heads saying, \u201cIf you don\u2019t let me track you on this app, I\u2019m not going to pay for your college.\u201d It\u2019s really gotten ridiculous. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou need to have your child\u2014that\u2019s the test-launch phase, while they\u2019re still in the home\u2014by the time they reach about 15\/16 years old, you\u2019re beginning to let them have independence. You are intentional about that test-launch phase; so that, when they head out the door, you\u2019re not following them to college.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> You know, that makes me think of another conversation\u2014it just came to my mind\u2014that we, as parents, need to have with God. We\u2019ve talked about these conversations with our kids; it\u2019s very critical.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vicki:<\/strong> Yes, I like that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> But there\u2019s a conversation, where we need to go: \u201cGod, I need to trust You. He\u2019s old enough to be responsible; I\u2019ve raised him well. I\u2019m, in a sense, test-launching him. He\u2019s in college,\u201d\u2014or whatever; and I need to go, \u201cGod\u2026\u201d\u2014sometimes, you need to get on your knees. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve done this; I\u2019ve stood at the window, as they drove out when they\u2019re 16\u2014we\u2019ve all done this\u2014and looked up to heaven and said: \u201cGod I trust You. Who else can I trust?\u201d That never ends. What a way to\u2014 that\u2019s a conversation a lot of parents don\u2019t have.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> They\u2019re going to make mistakes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> They\u2019re going to do wrong things\/stupid things. They\u2019re going to get hurt. That's part of what God\u2019s going to use in their life\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014just like it\u2019s part of what He used in our lives; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Exactly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Pain shapes us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes, it does; that\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vicki:<\/strong> Yes, I love that. As mothers, it would be good to <em>pray<\/em> that we would resist the urge to <em>rescue<\/em> our sons. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Right, right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vicki:<\/strong> I found myself, in the college years\u2014my oldest son, when he left, my husband did this thing\u2014I\u2019m pretty sure I share about it in this book\u2014where he had our children sign a college contract. He\u2019s an attorney; so there\u2019s that, too, but you know. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut he did; he basically laid it out for them, each one, and said, \u201cI am about to invest approximately blank-amount into your college education, and this is what your mother and I expect in return\u2026.\u201d They had to sign the dotted line. It had parameters in place because this is a privilege\u2014this is a privilege, and we did not pay for it full out. We did have them earn their summer\u2014get their summer jobs\u2014earn some toward paying for books and leisure activities. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe laid out: \u201cIf you're going to drop a class, and you\u2019re going to take longer to graduate, your mother and I are paying for four years. Because once we hit the fifth year\u2014we have to pay tuition; we have to pay for food\u2014so you\u2019re on your own that year. You will have to go and get a bank loan if you extend it past the four years.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSame thing with grades: \u201cIf we see that you\u2019re\u2014basically, you\u2019ve decided to party instead of study, then we\u2019re going to go ahead and strike this: \u2018The deal's off. You\u2019re going to come home; you\u2019re going to get a job. You\u2019re not going to live at home; you\u2019re going to pay to live somewhere else.\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo they <em>knew<\/em>: \u201cWow! We better leave the nest and fly, because\u201d\u2014now, of course, we weren\u2019t ogres in the sense, if they\u2014 both sons, I believe, came back and <em>briefly<\/em> stayed\u2014I called it a \u201clayover.\u201d If you let them come back, they should be looking for a job; they should have a plan in place. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe problem is\u2014for a lot of our guys, the layover ends up being a permanent solution. Before you know it, they\u2019re 35; and mom\u2019s doing their laundry, and cooking, their favorite meals, and going out and getting them buffalo wings so they can play video games. [Laughter] It\u2019s just not\u2014no, it\u2019s not.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We\u2019ve talked, really, about one of the main conversations today; and that\u2019s the conversation that you need to grow up: \u201cChildhood is only for a season; and if you\u2019re 16, the season is ending quickly, if it\u2019s not already over.\u201d These are the kinds of things that, as parents, we need to be purposeful and intentional about. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tVicki, your book helps us, as parents, have these conversations. The book I\u2019m talking about is <em>Five Conversations You Must Have with Your Son<\/em>. You can go to our website, FamilyLifeToday.com, to request a copy. Or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY. Again, the website to order your copy of Vicki Courtney\u2019s book, <em>Five Conversations You Must Have with Your Son<\/em>, go to FamilyLifeToday.com to order; or call 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, in addition to conversations we ought to be having with our sons, there are probably some conversations we ought to be having as couples to help make sure our marriages are strong after what has been a strenuous season for most of us in our marriages in the midst of what\u2019s been a pretty crazy year. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> has put together a resource online called \u201cTake Your Marriage from Good to Great.\u201d It\u2019s a free resource, and it includes a couple of online courses. There is one on conflict resolution and biblical principles for how to deal with conflict when it happens in a marriage. Four messages you can download and listen to, maybe, together: Voddie Baucham, Paul David Tripp, Juli Slattery, Dr. Gary Chapman. There\u2019s a downloadable eBook that\u2019s got conversation starters included. All of it is free. Just go to FamilyLifeToday.com and download the \u201cTake Your Marriage from Good to Great\u201d resource. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>When you do, you automatically become eligible to win a trip to FamilyLife, sit in on a <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> recording session, have dinner with Dave and Ann Wilson. We\u2019ll cover the costs of your airfare, your hotel, your travel expenses, the dinner\u2014all of it. No purchase is necessary. The contest ends August 14<sup>th<\/sup>. Restrictions apply, and official rules can be found at FamilyLife.com\/good-contest. So take advantage of the content that is available; and maybe, we\u2019ll see you at an upcoming <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> recording session. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, finally, we hope every one of you will get a copy of my new book, which is called <em>Love Like You Mean It<\/em>. It\u2019s a book about understanding love, biblically, rather than understanding the cultural view of love, which comes to us from pop songs and romantic comedies. The biblical definition is more durable; it\u2019s more rugged; and it builds a relationship that, not only goes the distance, but where there is deeper satisfaction in your marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe book is our thank-you gift to you when you support the ongoing ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> when you help us help others. <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is all about effectively developing godly marriages and families. We\u2019re touching hundreds of thousands of people every day, and you\u2019re the ones who make that possible every time you donate. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can donate online at FamilyLifeToday.com, or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY to donate. When you do, be sure to ask for your copy of my book, <em>Love Like You Mean It<\/em>; and we\u2019d love to get a copy to you. Thanks for your support of this ministry.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you can be here tomorrow. We want to talk about what you do, as parents, to hold up a high standard with your kids and yet, at the same time, let them know that when they mess up\u2014because they will\u2014when they mess up, there is forgiveness, there is hope, there is redemption. Vicki Courtney joins us again tomorrow to talk about that. I hope you can join us as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our hosts, Dave and Ann Wilson, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\"><u>donating today<\/u><\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2020 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\"><u>www.FamilyLife.com<\/u><\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:28:26"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["26.03M"],"filesize_raw":["27298883"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-306324.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-306324.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f 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your son ready for the real world? Vicki Courtney advises moms to encourage their sons toward independence and responsibility so they will be eager to leave home when it's time.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylife.com\/fl2020-08-12.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vicki:<\/strong> Yes, we could go on and on. And of course, we walked a mile in the snow to school; right? [Laughter] We all did that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, I, just this morning, read an article; it talked about parents tracking their college students to the point that there\u2019s this Life360 app. Students joke about it; but they\u2019re now holding college tuition over their heads saying, \u201cIf you don\u2019t let me track you on this app, I\u2019m not going to pay for your college.\u201d It\u2019s really gotten ridiculous. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou need to have your child\u2014that\u2019s the test-launch phase, while they\u2019re still in the home\u2014by the time they reach about 15\/16 years old, you\u2019re beginning to let them have independence. You are intentional about that test-launch phase; so that, when they head out the door, you\u2019re not following them to college.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> You know, that makes me think of another conversation\u2014it just came to my mind\u2014that we, as parents, need to have with God. We\u2019ve talked about these conversations with our kids; it\u2019s very critical.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vicki:<\/strong> Yes, I like that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> But there\u2019s a conversation, where we need to go: \u201cGod, I need to trust You. He\u2019s old enough to be responsible; I\u2019ve raised him well. I\u2019m, in a sense, test-launching him. He\u2019s in college,\u201d\u2014or whatever; and I need to go, \u201cGod\u2026\u201d\u2014sometimes, you need to get on your knees. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve done this; I\u2019ve stood at the window, as they drove out when they\u2019re 16\u2014we\u2019ve all done this\u2014and looked up to heaven and said: \u201cGod I trust You. Who else can I trust?\u201d That never ends. What a way to\u2014 that\u2019s a conversation a lot of parents don\u2019t have.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> They\u2019re going to make mistakes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> They\u2019re going to do wrong things\/stupid things. They\u2019re going to get hurt. That's part of what God\u2019s going to use in their life\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014just like it\u2019s part of what He used in our lives; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Exactly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Pain shapes us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes, it does; that\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vicki:<\/strong> Yes, I love that. As mothers, it would be good to <em>pray<\/em> that we would resist the urge to <em>rescue<\/em> our sons. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Right, right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vicki:<\/strong> I found myself, in the college years\u2014my oldest son, when he left, my husband did this thing\u2014I\u2019m pretty sure I share about it in this book\u2014where he had our children sign a college contract. He\u2019s an attorney; so there\u2019s that, too, but you know. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut he did; he basically laid it out for them, each one, and said, \u201cI am about to invest approximately blank-amount into your college education, and this is what your mother and I expect in return\u2026.\u201d They had to sign the dotted line. It had parameters in place because this is a privilege\u2014this is a privilege, and we did not pay for it full out. We did have them earn their summer\u2014get their summer jobs\u2014earn some toward paying for books and leisure activities. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe laid out: \u201cIf you're going to drop a class, and you\u2019re going to take longer to graduate, your mother and I are paying for four years. Because once we hit the fifth year\u2014we have to pay tuition; we have to pay for food\u2014so you\u2019re on your own that year. You will have to go and get a bank loan if you extend it past the four years.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSame thing with grades: \u201cIf we see that you\u2019re\u2014basically, you\u2019ve decided to party instead of study, then we\u2019re going to go ahead and strike this: \u2018The deal's off. You\u2019re going to come home; you\u2019re going to get a job. You\u2019re not going to live at home; you\u2019re going to pay to live somewhere else.\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo they <em>knew<\/em>: \u201cWow! We better leave the nest and fly, because\u201d\u2014now, of course, we weren\u2019t ogres in the sense, if they\u2014 both sons, I believe, came back and <em>briefly<\/em> stayed\u2014I called it a \u201clayover.\u201d If you let them come back, they should be looking for a job; they should have a plan in place. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe problem is\u2014for a lot of our guys, the layover ends up being a permanent solution. Before you know it, they\u2019re 35; and mom\u2019s doing their laundry, and cooking, their favorite meals, and going out and getting them buffalo wings so they can play video games. [Laughter] It\u2019s just not\u2014no, it\u2019s not.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We\u2019ve talked, really, about one of the main conversations today; and that\u2019s the conversation that you need to grow up: \u201cChildhood is only for a season; and if you\u2019re 16, the season is ending quickly, if it\u2019s not already over.\u201d These are the kinds of things that, as parents, we need to be purposeful and intentional about. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tVicki, your book helps us, as parents, have these conversations. The book I\u2019m talking about is <em>Five Conversations You Must Have with Your Son<\/em>. You can go to our website, FamilyLifeToday.com, to request a copy. Or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY. Again, the website to order your copy of Vicki Courtney\u2019s book, <em>Five Conversations You Must Have with Your Son<\/em>, go to FamilyLifeToday.com to order; or call 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, in addition to conversations we ought to be having with our sons, there are probably some conversations we ought to be having as couples to help make sure our marriages are strong after what has been a strenuous season for most of us in our marriages in the midst of what\u2019s been a pretty crazy year. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> has put together a resource online called \u201cTake Your Marriage from Good to Great.\u201d It\u2019s a free resource, and it includes a couple of online courses. There is one on conflict resolution and biblical principles for how to deal with conflict when it happens in a marriage. Four messages you can download and listen to, maybe, together: Voddie Baucham, Paul David Tripp, Juli Slattery, Dr. Gary Chapman. There\u2019s a downloadable eBook that\u2019s got conversation starters included. All of it is free. Just go to FamilyLifeToday.com and download the \u201cTake Your Marriage from Good to Great\u201d resource. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>When you do, you automatically become eligible to win a trip to FamilyLife, sit in on a <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> recording session, have dinner with Dave and Ann Wilson. We\u2019ll cover the costs of your airfare, your hotel, your travel expenses, the dinner\u2014all of it. No purchase is necessary. The contest ends August 14<sup>th<\/sup>. Restrictions apply, and official rules can be found at FamilyLife.com\/good-contest. So take advantage of the content that is available; and maybe, we\u2019ll see you at an upcoming <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> recording session. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, finally, we hope every one of you will get a copy of my new book, which is called <em>Love Like You Mean It<\/em>. It\u2019s a book about understanding love, biblically, rather than understanding the cultural view of love, which comes to us from pop songs and romantic comedies. The biblical definition is more durable; it\u2019s more rugged; and it builds a relationship that, not only goes the distance, but where there is deeper satisfaction in your marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe book is our thank-you gift to you when you support the ongoing ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> when you help us help others. <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is all about effectively developing godly marriages and families. We\u2019re touching hundreds of thousands of people every day, and you\u2019re the ones who make that possible every time you donate. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can donate online at FamilyLifeToday.com, or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY to donate. When you do, be sure to ask for your copy of my book, <em>Love Like You Mean It<\/em>; and we\u2019d love to get a copy to you. Thanks for your support of this ministry.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you can be here tomorrow. We want to talk about what you do, as parents, to hold up a high standard with your kids and yet, at the same time, let them know that when they mess up\u2014because they will\u2014when they mess up, there is forgiveness, there is hope, there is redemption. Vicki Courtney joins us again tomorrow to talk about that. I hope you can join us as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our hosts, Dave and Ann Wilson, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\"><u>donating today<\/u><\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2020 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\"><u>www.FamilyLife.com<\/u><\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/306324","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=306324"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=306324"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=306324"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=306324"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=306324"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=306324"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=306324"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}