{"id":305390,"date":"2019-10-02T06:00:04","date_gmt":"2019-10-02T10:00:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/what-about-single-women\/"},"modified":"2024-10-08T00:16:59","modified_gmt":"2024-10-08T04:16:59","slug":"what-about-single-women","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/what-about-single-women\/","title":{"rendered":"What About Single Women?"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Abigail Dodds teaches on the beauty of God&#8217;s good design regarding gender. Hear how single women can be nurturers and life givers in their homes and communities.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2019-10-02.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:30:04","filesize":"27.53M","filesize_raw":"28865295","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2848,2831,2093],"tags":[5315,6745,4763,4001],"podcast_series":[8305],"cwp_profile":[9561],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-305390","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-cultural-issues","category-wives","category-women","tag-gender-differences","tag-gods-design-for-women","tag-single-women","tag-women","podcast_series-atypical-woman","cwp_profile-abigail-dodds","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/305390\/what-about-single-women","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/305390\/what-about-single-women","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"fKlvL2kFxA\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/what-about-single-women\/\">What About Single Women?<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/what-about-single-women\/embed\/#?secret=fKlvL2kFxA\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;What About Single Women?&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"fKlvL2kFxA\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2019-10-02.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2019-10-02.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Wednesday, October 2<sup>nd<\/sup>. Our hosts are Dave and Ann Wilson; I\u2019m Bob Lepine. There is a right kind of empowerment and a wrong kind of empowerment for both men and women. We need to make sure we\u2019re focused on the right kind of empowerment. We\u2019ll talk more about that today. Stay with us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. What did you just say? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> I just said, \u201cThis is going to get some backlash.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And what did you say? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I said, \u201cOh, I\u2019m getting used to it.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Okay; the person who is getting used to backlash is Abigail Dodds, who joins us again on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. The woman, who says, \u201cThis is going to get some backlash,\u201d\u2014Ann Wilson. Why? Why? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes; why, honey? Why do you say that? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Why do you say this will get backlash? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Because some women are going to be really angry about this\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u2014these episodes\u2014of saying: \u201cI totally disagree. Women are just as strong\/just as a fearless as men\u201d; and so, yes; there are going to be some people that don\u2019t like this. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014or don\u2019t like your book, which is called <em>(A)Typical Woman: Free, Whole, and Called In Christ<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe thing I love is that Abigail has taken on the courageous task of saying, \u201cOkay; let\u2019s look at how the Bible helps us understand that womanhood and manhood\/that gender is God\u2019s good design and is to be celebrated and embraced rather than rebelled against and done away with.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s been what we\u2019ve been trying to explore because, as we\u2019ve said this week, Abigail, to try to get to a cohesive definition of femininity is a daunting challenge. There are words I have heard used: \u201cSo, a woman is life-giving,\u201d\u2014you\u2019ve heard that expression; right? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> In a biological sense, women can give birth. Men can be life-giving to other men; right? When we say life-giving is a quality of womanhood, but men can still do it. Help us understand that distinction. Isn\u2019t everything\u2014men are courageous; well, aren\u2019t women courageous? Women are tender; well, shouldn\u2019t men be tender? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> How do we deal with all of this stuff? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right?! Well, that is what makes it all so difficult is\u2014and even just what you said, Ann, at the beginning\u2014about women feeling offended because they think they also are just as strong and fearless. I\u2019m thinking, \u201cThey are just as fearless.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> I was going to say\u2014yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> And yet, I do think that the physical reality gives an essence or a shape to even the spiritual reality or the nurturing reality. It\u2019s not so much that we don\u2019t have certain qualities and we do have others and men don\u2019t have certain qualities and they do have others in the spiritual realm\u2014let\u2019s say\u2014but there is a matter of emphasis that happens. As someone who hasn\u2019t often thought of myself as particularly typical, becoming a mother did show me that I was, maybe, a bit more typical than I had thought. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor instance, I learned that my husband really does take a lot more risks than I do. Even though, going into being a parent, I thought of myself as pretty laidback\/pretty open to risk. In some ways, I am more than other women; but when it comes to me next to my husband, I\u2019m not!\u2014I\u2019m not. I\u2019m the one who is like, \u201cOh, let\u2019s slow down.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Or it becomes\u2014I realized that too; like\u2014I felt like: \u201cI\u2019m a risk taker. I\u2019m an adventurer. I will take any risk that Dave will have\u201d; but then you put my kids with Dave\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right; it changes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u2014and suddenly\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> She said, \u201cMy kids.\u201d Did you notice that? [Laughter] They are my kids too! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I know how that works. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> But suddenly, I thought, \u201cI am not a risk-taker with my children\/with <em>our<\/em> children\u201d; but Dave was. That\u2019s where I thought that, too\u2014like: \u201cWhoa. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u201cI guess I don\u2019t have quite as much.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I can see some more innate differences coming out; and it\u2019s like, \u201cOh, some of these stereotypes make a little more sense to me now.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> So, what\u2019s going on in our culture, where nobody wants to address that? I mean, you know, I\u2019ve been preaching for 29 years. Ten\/fifteen years ago, I could stand on stage and say: \u201cMen and women are different. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> \u201cHere is how\u2026\u201d People laughed; they enjoyed it. Now, you say that; and there\u2019s like: \u201cOooh! They are not different. We\u2019re really similar.\u201d Tell us what\u2019s happening. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Well, when you\u2019ve completely deconstructed biological sex, then saying what you just said isn\u2019t just a small thing to say; it\u2019s a <em>gigantic leap<\/em> because the general hive mind of our culture\/the general mindset is so, so far down the road from that. It really is a deconstructing of everything\u2014it\u2019s: \u201cWe\u2019re self-makers. We say what we are\u2014full autonomy. <em>We<\/em> get to choose how this all works.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You mentioned that, when you became a mom, all of a sudden, some of the innate woman-ness started to emerge. So often, when we talk about what it means to be a woman or what femininity is, we define it in comparison to men or in the context of marriage\u2014how husbands and wives are different or moms and dads\u2014we put it in that family structure. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m thinking: \u201cWhat about the single woman? How does she understand her woman-ness as a standalone?\u201d Certainly, there are other men in her world; and so, it\u2019s not like we\u2019re absent of that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Can a woman be complete if she never marries or never has a child? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; can she be fully a woman? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Absolutely; yes\u2014no equivocations\u2014yes in every way. Because, while there is a reality that God has made the world in such a way\u2014that marriage must exist for this to all go forward\/children must be had\u2014there\u2019s such particular provision in the Scripture for the single people and the intense value that they bring to the body of Christ. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s like a very distilled dense value that they bring to us; because as Paul says, \u201cThey are able to be single-minded in their mission for the Lord.\u201d The church desperately, desperately needs them\u2014and not just as a babysitter\u2014we need their minds. We need\u2014yes\u2014we need even their physical bodies to come and labor among us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u2014their gifts\u2014their spiritual gifts.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Yes; we need their spiritual gifts to be enhancing in so many ways. For a single woman, I think Elisabeth Elliot probably said it the very best when she said that \u201cSingleness is a gift, and we don\u2019t choose our gifts.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> So, in the question of embracing your womanhood\u2014certainly, you bring value, and you bring gifting, and you bring who you are to serve; but you\u2019re not called to be a specific helpmeet to a man, you\u2019re not called to be a biological life-giver and a nurturer to your child. If those are off the table for you, you can understand where a single woman would go: \u201cIt does feel like part of what it means to be a woman\u2014I\u2019m excluded from that. How do I process that?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right. I don\u2019t know that I\u2019d deny that: \u201cYes; you are excluded from something but not from anything that is essential.\u201d For some women, that might not be a grief; they might be very content in their singleness. For others, that might be a gigantic grief worth grieving over, and moving forward, recognizing that, again, those spiritual realities are still there in terms of what it means to be a woman. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLike I said\u2014Elisabeth Elliot being a mother\u2014or just because your body can\u2019t nurture and grow life as a home doesn\u2019t mean that you can\u2019t nurture and grow life in the church, and in your home, or your apartment, or your dorm room, or wherever you are. Making a home can still be a massive priority with incredible kingdom impact in terms of hospitality, and ministering to the needs of the saints, and doing all the things that Paul even talks about when he\u2019s giving qualifications for widows. He talks about how they washed the feet of the saints, and they\u2019ve done these things well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, you may not have children that you\u2019ve raised; but there are great many things that you can still do in serving the Lord Christ and in sharing Him with everyone you meet. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> So, here is a question. This\u2014I\u2019ll be interested to see how you answer this. A woman, who is married, is to be a helpmeet to her husband. Should an unmarried woman seek to be a helper to the men in her world, or is that not a requirement for her? Is that not a part of her femininity, to look around and say: \u201cWell, I\u2019m a woman. I am here to try to be a helper to the men around me\u201d? Some women will hear me say that and go: \u201cNo; I\u2019m not here to be their helper. I\u2019m their peer.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> That word\u2014see, that word just grates at you\u2014like, \u201cWell, I don\u2019t want to help <em>him<\/em>!\u201d because I looked that up one time. As I was looking that up in the Hebrew, I thought, \u201cI need to get a better definition; because I first looked it up in <em>Webster\u2019s Dictionary<\/em>. That word\u2014it said in the dictionary: \u201cA go-for, a person that does the dirty work. Someone important tells them what to do.\u201d Of course, any woman would grate at that word. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> However, what do you think, Abigail?\u2014would a single woman\u2014is that her place to help a man? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I still think it is, but I want to be <em>really<\/em> careful with my qualifications; because what some people might hear when I say that is that, somehow, there is some sort of weird husband\/wife thing going on, where all women are submitting to all men; and I don\u2019t believe that one bit. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I don\u2019t either, and neither do you guys. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Nope. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> None of us do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Nope. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Let\u2019s just be really clear. It is not the responsibility of women, in general, to submit to men in general. When the Bible talks about it, husbands and wives, yes; men and women, no. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right; exactly. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Okay. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> With that very clear, I feel very comfortable; thank you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI would just say, \u201cYes, I still do think there would be a disposition to help.\u201d I don\u2019t think that\u2019s degrading, and I don\u2019t even think that that means she can\u2019t be a leader in certain ways or in many ways even; but that\u2019s a God-glorifying disposition. Who wouldn\u2019t want to do that? Like I said, rightly-oriented about God, understanding Him as a loving Father, who made His creation and called it \u201cvery good,\u201d then I think it\u2019s a good thing, then, to want to be an easer\/a helper. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We were out at dinner the other night\u2014Mary Ann and me. We were at one of these restaurants that has TV\/flat-paneled TV\u2019s going on. There were sports on the TV. There were two women, who were\u2014I don\u2019t know if they were cage fighting or boxing\u2014but they were going at each other. Mary Ann looked at me and she said, \u201cIs that something you\u2019re interested in watching?\u201d [Laughter] I thought, \u201cThis is a\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Bob, what was your answer? I want to hear this! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I thought, \u201cThis is a trick question.\u201d [Laughter] I understood the bigger question at play in terms of things that we think of in traditionally male categories. We don\u2019t typically think of a four-year-old and a two-year-old daughter in the living room, wrestling with each other. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That might happen; somebody is going to write me and say, \u201cThat happens all the time.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Yes; I did that with my brother; yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Okay; that\u2019s right; but if it had been you and a sister, would that have happened?\u2014or were you doing it with your brother because your brother was looking for another guy to play with, and you were the closest thing around and\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Probably. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014he just\u2014and you were happy to join in because you wanted to be one of the guys? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Ann:<\/strong> And my sister was very feminine. I would have probably liked to do that with her because I would have <em>beat<\/em> her; but you\u2019re\u2014[Laughter]\u2014yes, that\u2019s a great question. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> So, in the midst of these kind of\u2014typically, guys wrestle and girls do something else\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u2014play with dolls; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. In those kinds of general categories, if a woman\/a young woman, who is growing up, goes: \u201cI want to be the kicker on the football team. I just have always wanted to play. I\u2019m a good kicker; I should be able to go out there,\u201d and \u201cIf I get tackled by the guys, I can get tackled by the guys.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Let\u2019s take it to Abigail. Would you let your daughter be the kicker on a football team? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> If she said, \u201cThat\u2019s what I want to be, Mom;\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Yes, and she\u2019s good at it; and she\u2019s a great soccer player. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014\u201cI\u2019m really good.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I would say: \u201cAim higher, daughter. Let\u2019s get a new dream.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Really? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I mean, \u201cAim higher,\u201d in the sense of: \u201cThis, too, shall pass. This doesn\u2019t need to be your ambition.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u2014\u201cor identity\u201d? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right; I mean, there is nothing wrong with kicking a ball. Don\u2019t hear me say that, because that\u2019s silly legalism; but to be on an all-male sports team is a whole other thing\u2014to put yourself in a position, where you could potentially be tackled by men. First of all, we\u2019re training our men, then: \u201dThat it\u2019s okay to tackle women.\u201d That\u2019s just not okay. If my son were on the team, I would hope he would say: \u201cI\u2019m sorry. I\u2019m not playing, because I won\u2019t do that.\u201d To have a daughter, who would want to put herself in that position, I would just say, \u201cYou were made for more, dear.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> I think I would ask, \u201cTell me about that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u201cTell me what you long for in that.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Absolutely; because there are other ways, then, of directing her. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Abigail, in the last part of your book, you talk about being fearless and free women in Christ. When I hear that, I think every woman longs for that. She wants to be fearless, but she also wants to be free. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat I\u2019ve encountered, over the years, is women are not free. I think they are shackled by shame; they are shackled by comparison. There is a part of us that, as women, it\u2019s hard for us to celebrate each other because of our own insecurities. What does it mean, as we finish up, to be free? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Yes; I think you said it exactly right. That\u2019s also what I\u2019ve seen\u2014is a huge amount of insecurity in women. Where all that comes from\u2014of course, there are external forces that can play into that\u2014but primarily, I think we need to say, \u201cInsecurity comes from not trusting in Christ, who is our security.\u201d The more we can get our footing in Him\/the more we can identify, fully, and wholly in Christ, the more secure we will be; the more free we will definitely be; and the more freedom will be conceived of appropriately. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSometimes, you use a word like free, and people think, \u201cOh, well, free\u2014that just means I get to do whatever <em>I<\/em> want\u201d; but that is <em>not<\/em> the definition of freedom in the Scripture. When Christ sets us free, it\u2019s so that we can be unshackled from the chains of sin and death. It is not freedom to be autonomous and go on sinning. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Defining it appropriately is <em>so<\/em> essential right now in our culture because we\u2019ve completely misconstrued the idea of freedom. Unless we make sure we\u2019re telling women: \u201cThis is what Jesus means by freedom: He wants you free from your sin. He wants you free to walk with Him toward holiness,\u201d then it will end up becoming a little mimic of what the world says, \u201cReal self-empowering,\u201d\u2014where we don\u2019t want to be self-empowered; we want to be empowered by the Holy Spirit of the Lord. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> I love what you wrote\u2014it was back in the chapter about single women\u2014it was: \u201cJesus doesn\u2019t complete the incomplete,\u201d\u2014you know, like \u201cJesus will be the one to complete you.\u201d You say: \u201cHe utterly overcomes and swallows us up in Himself. We are made new and whole in Christ, not merely completed by Him.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> That\u2019s really beautiful. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Beautiful truth of the redemption of Christ; right? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And I\u2019m thinking about Galatians 5:1 as you\u2019re talking, where Paul says, \u201cFor freedom, Christ has set us free.\u201d Then you go, \u201cFree from what?\u201d Well, he answers it: \u201cDon\u2019t go back to the yoke of slavery to sin.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That\u2019s the slavery. Then, later on, in verse 13, he says: \u201cYou were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh; but through love, serve one another.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat verse, in the midst of the free grace culture that I see, sometimes, in the church, where people say: \u201cWell, you know, there is grace. I\u2019m free in Christ,\u201d\u2014it\u2019s not freedom to indulge the flesh\u2014it\u2019s freedom to love and serve your brothers and to be free from the yoke of slavery and from the bond of the flesh that kept you in that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just want to ask you, as we kind of draw this to a close: \u201cIf you were pointing your daughters\/young women to verses in the Bible to say, \u2018This is going to help you understand what it means that God made you a woman,\u2019 do you take them to Proverbs 31?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I wouldn\u2019t start there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Okay. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> But, yes; absolutely; I would. Where I would start and where I started with this book was, simultaneously, two passages: Colossians 1:15-20 and, then, Genesis 1:1-2. Colossians 1:15-20 is a hymn that Paul wrote about the supremacy of Christ. What it tells us is that\u2014not just is Christ our Savior, who enters the world sent by the Father\u2014but that Christ was <em>before<\/em> all things. That word, \u201cbefore,\u201d really is what prompted so much of this thinking\u2014that He was <em>before<\/em> all things and that all things were created <em>through<\/em> Christ and for Christ. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen go back and read Genesis. Then go back and think about the fact that we were made male and female <em>through<\/em> Christ and <em>for<\/em> Christ. It starts to put a little bit of a new dimension on how we think about what we were made for. It just\u2014it gives me tons of hope. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> It\u2019s an anticipation\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Yes! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u2014of what He has done and what He has created in us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> When you brought up Colossians 1, I thought of the key verse for the <em>Passport2Purity<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> series that FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> produced years ago. The one verse that starts that off\u2014when you want to help your kids understand what it means to emerge in adolescence\u2014the birds and the bees, peer pressure\/all of those issues they are going to face\u2014we take you to Colossians 1:18: \u201cHe is also the head of the body, the church; and He is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, so that He, Himself, might come to have first place in everything,\u201d\u2014in <em>everything<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you think about your femaleness and your maleness: \u201cDoes Jesus have first place in those things?\u201d It\u2019s the Lordship of Christ over every aspect of your life: \u201cAre you surrendered to that, or are you rebelling against that?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I\u2019m watching Abigail nod vigorously\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I am nodding my head. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014\u201cYes.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I am \u201cAmen\u201d-ing in my heart. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Absolutely. Abigail, thank you for your work, for your courage, for your thinking, for tackling hard issues; and all of the letters we get, we are sending to you; okay? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Alright. [Laughter] I\u2019ll frame them and put them on the wall. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Thanks for being on <em>\u00a0<\/em><em>Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve got copies of Abigail Dodds\u2019 book, <em>(A)Typical Woman<\/em>, in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. You can order the book from us when you go online at FamilyLifeToday.com, or call to order: 1-800-FL-TODAY is our number. Again, the title of the book is <em>(A)Typical Woman<\/em>\u2014and the \u201cA\u201d is in parentheses\u2014<em>(A)Typical Woman<\/em>. Order online at FamilyLifeToday.com or call 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve got the president of FamilyLife, David Robbins, joining us today. You\u2019ve been listening to this conversation this week with a different grid, because you are raising a daughter. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> That\u2019s right. I\u2019m raising a daughter who is soon becoming a teenager. All the conversation about insecurity for girls growing up today just prompts me to think about how I\u2019m potentially missing her heart right now in some things and how so many parents miss their little girls\u2019 hearts. Do I really know and am I in tune with what\u2019s happening and the emotions going on in her heart and in her head? Too often, I think I try to meet her emotion with logic and try to convince her of something. You know, logical words will not adequately speak to the emotion going on inside her heart. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m convinced that, if parents provide security for girls to be safe and be able to process what\u2019s surfacing without rushing to fix the problem, it\u2019ll provide the security and safety to step into who God is really making them to be. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I think that\u2019s wise counsel. I think we\u2019ve got to pull back and not just ask the question, \u201cWhat are our daughters or our wives thinking?\u201d but \u201cWhat are they feeling?\u201d Then process that and make that a part of that conversation. That\u2019s a good word. Thank you, David. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI should also let our listeners know\u2014we\u2019ve been making Abigail\u2019s book available this week to any <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listener who\u2014maybe, you\u2019ve been listening for a while; you\u2019ve benefitted from this program; you believe in the mission of FamilyLife; you want to see us effectively develop godly marriages and families, who change the world one home at a time\u2014you resonate with that mission; and you\u2019re ready to join the team of monthly Legacy Partners, who make all of this ministry possible. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA Legacy Partner is somebody who makes a monthly donation so that <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> can continue to sustain itself\u2014can grow, and expand, and reach more people, providing practical biblical help and hope for marriages and families. If you become a new Legacy Partner this week, we want to say, \u201cThank you,\u201d by doing two things. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFirst of all, we\u2019ll send you a copy of Abigail\u2019s book, the book we\u2019ve talked about this week: <em>(A)Typical Woman: Free, Whole, and Called in Christ<\/em>; and we\u2019ll send you a gift card so you and your spouse, or another couple you know, can attend one of our upcoming <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> marriage getaways. This gift card covers the registration cost, and it\u2019s our gift to you when you become a Legacy Partner. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019ve been thinking about going to a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>, or you know someone you\u2019d like to send as your guest, become a Legacy Partner today. We\u2019ll send you both the book and the gift card for the getaway. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com, click the button that says, \u201cDonate.\u201d All the information about becoming a Legacy Partner is available there; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and say: \u201cI\u2019m ready to join the team. I\u2019m ready to become a Legacy Partner.\u201d The number, again, is 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to hear about which aspect of the fruit of the Spirit may be the most important aspect to engage with if you\u2019re part of a blended family. We\u2019re going to hear from a husband in a blended family, Pastor Rob Bugh, who has got some thoughts on this subject. I think you\u2019re going to appreciate what he has to say. I hope you can tune in. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our hosts, Dave and Ann Wilson, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2019 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:30:04"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["27.53M"],"filesize_raw":["28865295"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-305390.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-305390.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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Dodds teaches on the beauty of God's good design regarding gender. Hear how single women can be nurturers and life givers in their homes and communities.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2019-10-02.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Wednesday, October 2<sup>nd<\/sup>. Our hosts are Dave and Ann Wilson; I\u2019m Bob Lepine. There is a right kind of empowerment and a wrong kind of empowerment for both men and women. We need to make sure we\u2019re focused on the right kind of empowerment. We\u2019ll talk more about that today. Stay with us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. What did you just say? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> I just said, \u201cThis is going to get some backlash.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And what did you say? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I said, \u201cOh, I\u2019m getting used to it.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Okay; the person who is getting used to backlash is Abigail Dodds, who joins us again on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. The woman, who says, \u201cThis is going to get some backlash,\u201d\u2014Ann Wilson. Why? Why? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Yes; why, honey? Why do you say that? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Why do you say this will get backlash? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Because some women are going to be really angry about this\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u2014these episodes\u2014of saying: \u201cI totally disagree. Women are just as strong\/just as a fearless as men\u201d; and so, yes; there are going to be some people that don\u2019t like this. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014or don\u2019t like your book, which is called <em>(A)Typical Woman: Free, Whole, and Called In Christ<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe thing I love is that Abigail has taken on the courageous task of saying, \u201cOkay; let\u2019s look at how the Bible helps us understand that womanhood and manhood\/that gender is God\u2019s good design and is to be celebrated and embraced rather than rebelled against and done away with.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s been what we\u2019ve been trying to explore because, as we\u2019ve said this week, Abigail, to try to get to a cohesive definition of femininity is a daunting challenge. There are words I have heard used: \u201cSo, a woman is life-giving,\u201d\u2014you\u2019ve heard that expression; right? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> In a biological sense, women can give birth. Men can be life-giving to other men; right? When we say life-giving is a quality of womanhood, but men can still do it. Help us understand that distinction. Isn\u2019t everything\u2014men are courageous; well, aren\u2019t women courageous? Women are tender; well, shouldn\u2019t men be tender? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> How do we deal with all of this stuff? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right?! Well, that is what makes it all so difficult is\u2014and even just what you said, Ann, at the beginning\u2014about women feeling offended because they think they also are just as strong and fearless. I\u2019m thinking, \u201cThey are just as fearless.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> I was going to say\u2014yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> And yet, I do think that the physical reality gives an essence or a shape to even the spiritual reality or the nurturing reality. It\u2019s not so much that we don\u2019t have certain qualities and we do have others and men don\u2019t have certain qualities and they do have others in the spiritual realm\u2014let\u2019s say\u2014but there is a matter of emphasis that happens. As someone who hasn\u2019t often thought of myself as particularly typical, becoming a mother did show me that I was, maybe, a bit more typical than I had thought. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor instance, I learned that my husband really does take a lot more risks than I do. Even though, going into being a parent, I thought of myself as pretty laidback\/pretty open to risk. In some ways, I am more than other women; but when it comes to me next to my husband, I\u2019m not!\u2014I\u2019m not. I\u2019m the one who is like, \u201cOh, let\u2019s slow down.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Or it becomes\u2014I realized that too; like\u2014I felt like: \u201cI\u2019m a risk taker. I\u2019m an adventurer. I will take any risk that Dave will have\u201d; but then you put my kids with Dave\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right; it changes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u2014and suddenly\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> She said, \u201cMy kids.\u201d Did you notice that? [Laughter] They are my kids too! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I know how that works. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> But suddenly, I thought, \u201cI am not a risk-taker with my children\/with <em>our<\/em> children\u201d; but Dave was. That\u2019s where I thought that, too\u2014like: \u201cWhoa. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u201cI guess I don\u2019t have quite as much.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I can see some more innate differences coming out; and it\u2019s like, \u201cOh, some of these stereotypes make a little more sense to me now.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> So, what\u2019s going on in our culture, where nobody wants to address that? I mean, you know, I\u2019ve been preaching for 29 years. Ten\/fifteen years ago, I could stand on stage and say: \u201cMen and women are different. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> \u201cHere is how\u2026\u201d People laughed; they enjoyed it. Now, you say that; and there\u2019s like: \u201cOooh! They are not different. We\u2019re really similar.\u201d Tell us what\u2019s happening. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Well, when you\u2019ve completely deconstructed biological sex, then saying what you just said isn\u2019t just a small thing to say; it\u2019s a <em>gigantic leap<\/em> because the general hive mind of our culture\/the general mindset is so, so far down the road from that. It really is a deconstructing of everything\u2014it\u2019s: \u201cWe\u2019re self-makers. We say what we are\u2014full autonomy. <em>We<\/em> get to choose how this all works.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You mentioned that, when you became a mom, all of a sudden, some of the innate woman-ness started to emerge. So often, when we talk about what it means to be a woman or what femininity is, we define it in comparison to men or in the context of marriage\u2014how husbands and wives are different or moms and dads\u2014we put it in that family structure. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m thinking: \u201cWhat about the single woman? How does she understand her woman-ness as a standalone?\u201d Certainly, there are other men in her world; and so, it\u2019s not like we\u2019re absent of that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Can a woman be complete if she never marries or never has a child? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; can she be fully a woman? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Absolutely; yes\u2014no equivocations\u2014yes in every way. Because, while there is a reality that God has made the world in such a way\u2014that marriage must exist for this to all go forward\/children must be had\u2014there\u2019s such particular provision in the Scripture for the single people and the intense value that they bring to the body of Christ. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s like a very distilled dense value that they bring to us; because as Paul says, \u201cThey are able to be single-minded in their mission for the Lord.\u201d The church desperately, desperately needs them\u2014and not just as a babysitter\u2014we need their minds. We need\u2014yes\u2014we need even their physical bodies to come and labor among us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u2014their gifts\u2014their spiritual gifts.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Yes; we need their spiritual gifts to be enhancing in so many ways. For a single woman, I think Elisabeth Elliot probably said it the very best when she said that \u201cSingleness is a gift, and we don\u2019t choose our gifts.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> So, in the question of embracing your womanhood\u2014certainly, you bring value, and you bring gifting, and you bring who you are to serve; but you\u2019re not called to be a specific helpmeet to a man, you\u2019re not called to be a biological life-giver and a nurturer to your child. If those are off the table for you, you can understand where a single woman would go: \u201cIt does feel like part of what it means to be a woman\u2014I\u2019m excluded from that. How do I process that?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right. I don\u2019t know that I\u2019d deny that: \u201cYes; you are excluded from something but not from anything that is essential.\u201d For some women, that might not be a grief; they might be very content in their singleness. For others, that might be a gigantic grief worth grieving over, and moving forward, recognizing that, again, those spiritual realities are still there in terms of what it means to be a woman. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLike I said\u2014Elisabeth Elliot being a mother\u2014or just because your body can\u2019t nurture and grow life as a home doesn\u2019t mean that you can\u2019t nurture and grow life in the church, and in your home, or your apartment, or your dorm room, or wherever you are. Making a home can still be a massive priority with incredible kingdom impact in terms of hospitality, and ministering to the needs of the saints, and doing all the things that Paul even talks about when he\u2019s giving qualifications for widows. He talks about how they washed the feet of the saints, and they\u2019ve done these things well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, you may not have children that you\u2019ve raised; but there are great many things that you can still do in serving the Lord Christ and in sharing Him with everyone you meet. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> So, here is a question. This\u2014I\u2019ll be interested to see how you answer this. A woman, who is married, is to be a helpmeet to her husband. Should an unmarried woman seek to be a helper to the men in her world, or is that not a requirement for her? Is that not a part of her femininity, to look around and say: \u201cWell, I\u2019m a woman. I am here to try to be a helper to the men around me\u201d? Some women will hear me say that and go: \u201cNo; I\u2019m not here to be their helper. I\u2019m their peer.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> That word\u2014see, that word just grates at you\u2014like, \u201cWell, I don\u2019t want to help <em>him<\/em>!\u201d because I looked that up one time. As I was looking that up in the Hebrew, I thought, \u201cI need to get a better definition; because I first looked it up in <em>Webster\u2019s Dictionary<\/em>. That word\u2014it said in the dictionary: \u201cA go-for, a person that does the dirty work. Someone important tells them what to do.\u201d Of course, any woman would grate at that word. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> However, what do you think, Abigail?\u2014would a single woman\u2014is that her place to help a man? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I still think it is, but I want to be <em>really<\/em> careful with my qualifications; because what some people might hear when I say that is that, somehow, there is some sort of weird husband\/wife thing going on, where all women are submitting to all men; and I don\u2019t believe that one bit. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I don\u2019t either, and neither do you guys. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Nope. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> None of us do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Nope. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Let\u2019s just be really clear. It is not the responsibility of women, in general, to submit to men in general. When the Bible talks about it, husbands and wives, yes; men and women, no. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right; exactly. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Okay. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> With that very clear, I feel very comfortable; thank you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI would just say, \u201cYes, I still do think there would be a disposition to help.\u201d I don\u2019t think that\u2019s degrading, and I don\u2019t even think that that means she can\u2019t be a leader in certain ways or in many ways even; but that\u2019s a God-glorifying disposition. Who wouldn\u2019t want to do that? Like I said, rightly-oriented about God, understanding Him as a loving Father, who made His creation and called it \u201cvery good,\u201d then I think it\u2019s a good thing, then, to want to be an easer\/a helper. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We were out at dinner the other night\u2014Mary Ann and me. We were at one of these restaurants that has TV\/flat-paneled TV\u2019s going on. There were sports on the TV. There were two women, who were\u2014I don\u2019t know if they were cage fighting or boxing\u2014but they were going at each other. Mary Ann looked at me and she said, \u201cIs that something you\u2019re interested in watching?\u201d [Laughter] I thought, \u201cThis is a\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Bob, what was your answer? I want to hear this! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I thought, \u201cThis is a trick question.\u201d [Laughter] I understood the bigger question at play in terms of things that we think of in traditionally male categories. We don\u2019t typically think of a four-year-old and a two-year-old daughter in the living room, wrestling with each other. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That might happen; somebody is going to write me and say, \u201cThat happens all the time.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Yes; I did that with my brother; yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Okay; that\u2019s right; but if it had been you and a sister, would that have happened?\u2014or were you doing it with your brother because your brother was looking for another guy to play with, and you were the closest thing around and\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Probably. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014he just\u2014and you were happy to join in because you wanted to be one of the guys? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Ann:<\/strong> And my sister was very feminine. I would have probably liked to do that with her because I would have <em>beat<\/em> her; but you\u2019re\u2014[Laughter]\u2014yes, that\u2019s a great question. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> So, in the midst of these kind of\u2014typically, guys wrestle and girls do something else\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u2014play with dolls; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. In those kinds of general categories, if a woman\/a young woman, who is growing up, goes: \u201cI want to be the kicker on the football team. I just have always wanted to play. I\u2019m a good kicker; I should be able to go out there,\u201d and \u201cIf I get tackled by the guys, I can get tackled by the guys.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Let\u2019s take it to Abigail. Would you let your daughter be the kicker on a football team? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> If she said, \u201cThat\u2019s what I want to be, Mom;\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Yes, and she\u2019s good at it; and she\u2019s a great soccer player. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014\u201cI\u2019m really good.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I would say: \u201cAim higher, daughter. Let\u2019s get a new dream.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Really? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I mean, \u201cAim higher,\u201d in the sense of: \u201cThis, too, shall pass. This doesn\u2019t need to be your ambition.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u2014\u201cor identity\u201d? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Right; I mean, there is nothing wrong with kicking a ball. Don\u2019t hear me say that, because that\u2019s silly legalism; but to be on an all-male sports team is a whole other thing\u2014to put yourself in a position, where you could potentially be tackled by men. First of all, we\u2019re training our men, then: \u201dThat it\u2019s okay to tackle women.\u201d That\u2019s just not okay. If my son were on the team, I would hope he would say: \u201cI\u2019m sorry. I\u2019m not playing, because I won\u2019t do that.\u201d To have a daughter, who would want to put herself in that position, I would just say, \u201cYou were made for more, dear.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> I think I would ask, \u201cTell me about that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u201cTell me what you long for in that.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Absolutely; because there are other ways, then, of directing her. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> Abigail, in the last part of your book, you talk about being fearless and free women in Christ. When I hear that, I think every woman longs for that. She wants to be fearless, but she also wants to be free. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat I\u2019ve encountered, over the years, is women are not free. I think they are shackled by shame; they are shackled by comparison. There is a part of us that, as women, it\u2019s hard for us to celebrate each other because of our own insecurities. What does it mean, as we finish up, to be free? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Yes; I think you said it exactly right. That\u2019s also what I\u2019ve seen\u2014is a huge amount of insecurity in women. Where all that comes from\u2014of course, there are external forces that can play into that\u2014but primarily, I think we need to say, \u201cInsecurity comes from not trusting in Christ, who is our security.\u201d The more we can get our footing in Him\/the more we can identify, fully, and wholly in Christ, the more secure we will be; the more free we will definitely be; and the more freedom will be conceived of appropriately. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSometimes, you use a word like free, and people think, \u201cOh, well, free\u2014that just means I get to do whatever <em>I<\/em> want\u201d; but that is <em>not<\/em> the definition of freedom in the Scripture. When Christ sets us free, it\u2019s so that we can be unshackled from the chains of sin and death. It is not freedom to be autonomous and go on sinning. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Defining it appropriately is <em>so<\/em> essential right now in our culture because we\u2019ve completely misconstrued the idea of freedom. Unless we make sure we\u2019re telling women: \u201cThis is what Jesus means by freedom: He wants you free from your sin. He wants you free to walk with Him toward holiness,\u201d then it will end up becoming a little mimic of what the world says, \u201cReal self-empowering,\u201d\u2014where we don\u2019t want to be self-empowered; we want to be empowered by the Holy Spirit of the Lord. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> I love what you wrote\u2014it was back in the chapter about single women\u2014it was: \u201cJesus doesn\u2019t complete the incomplete,\u201d\u2014you know, like \u201cJesus will be the one to complete you.\u201d You say: \u201cHe utterly overcomes and swallows us up in Himself. We are made new and whole in Christ, not merely completed by Him.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> That\u2019s really beautiful. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Beautiful truth of the redemption of Christ; right? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And I\u2019m thinking about Galatians 5:1 as you\u2019re talking, where Paul says, \u201cFor freedom, Christ has set us free.\u201d Then you go, \u201cFree from what?\u201d Well, he answers it: \u201cDon\u2019t go back to the yoke of slavery to sin.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dave:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That\u2019s the slavery. Then, later on, in verse 13, he says: \u201cYou were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh; but through love, serve one another.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat verse, in the midst of the free grace culture that I see, sometimes, in the church, where people say: \u201cWell, you know, there is grace. I\u2019m free in Christ,\u201d\u2014it\u2019s not freedom to indulge the flesh\u2014it\u2019s freedom to love and serve your brothers and to be free from the yoke of slavery and from the bond of the flesh that kept you in that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just want to ask you, as we kind of draw this to a close: \u201cIf you were pointing your daughters\/young women to verses in the Bible to say, \u2018This is going to help you understand what it means that God made you a woman,\u2019 do you take them to Proverbs 31?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I wouldn\u2019t start there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Okay. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> But, yes; absolutely; I would. Where I would start and where I started with this book was, simultaneously, two passages: Colossians 1:15-20 and, then, Genesis 1:1-2. Colossians 1:15-20 is a hymn that Paul wrote about the supremacy of Christ. What it tells us is that\u2014not just is Christ our Savior, who enters the world sent by the Father\u2014but that Christ was <em>before<\/em> all things. That word, \u201cbefore,\u201d really is what prompted so much of this thinking\u2014that He was <em>before<\/em> all things and that all things were created <em>through<\/em> Christ and for Christ. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen go back and read Genesis. Then go back and think about the fact that we were made male and female <em>through<\/em> Christ and <em>for<\/em> Christ. It starts to put a little bit of a new dimension on how we think about what we were made for. It just\u2014it gives me tons of hope. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> It\u2019s an anticipation\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Yes! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ann:<\/strong> \u2014of what He has done and what He has created in us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> When you brought up Colossians 1, I thought of the key verse for the <em>Passport2Purity<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> series that FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> produced years ago. The one verse that starts that off\u2014when you want to help your kids understand what it means to emerge in adolescence\u2014the birds and the bees, peer pressure\/all of those issues they are going to face\u2014we take you to Colossians 1:18: \u201cHe is also the head of the body, the church; and He is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, so that He, Himself, might come to have first place in everything,\u201d\u2014in <em>everything<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you think about your femaleness and your maleness: \u201cDoes Jesus have first place in those things?\u201d It\u2019s the Lordship of Christ over every aspect of your life: \u201cAre you surrendered to that, or are you rebelling against that?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I\u2019m watching Abigail nod vigorously\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I am nodding my head. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014\u201cYes.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> I am \u201cAmen\u201d-ing in my heart. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Absolutely. Abigail, thank you for your work, for your courage, for your thinking, for tackling hard issues; and all of the letters we get, we are sending to you; okay? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Abigail:<\/strong> Alright. [Laughter] I\u2019ll frame them and put them on the wall. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Thanks for being on <em>\u00a0<\/em><em>Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve got copies of Abigail Dodds\u2019 book, <em>(A)Typical Woman<\/em>, in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. You can order the book from us when you go online at FamilyLifeToday.com, or call to order: 1-800-FL-TODAY is our number. Again, the title of the book is <em>(A)Typical Woman<\/em>\u2014and the \u201cA\u201d is in parentheses\u2014<em>(A)Typical Woman<\/em>. Order online at FamilyLifeToday.com or call 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve got the president of FamilyLife, David Robbins, joining us today. You\u2019ve been listening to this conversation this week with a different grid, because you are raising a daughter. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> That\u2019s right. I\u2019m raising a daughter who is soon becoming a teenager. All the conversation about insecurity for girls growing up today just prompts me to think about how I\u2019m potentially missing her heart right now in some things and how so many parents miss their little girls\u2019 hearts. Do I really know and am I in tune with what\u2019s happening and the emotions going on in her heart and in her head? Too often, I think I try to meet her emotion with logic and try to convince her of something. You know, logical words will not adequately speak to the emotion going on inside her heart. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m convinced that, if parents provide security for girls to be safe and be able to process what\u2019s surfacing without rushing to fix the problem, it\u2019ll provide the security and safety to step into who God is really making them to be. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I think that\u2019s wise counsel. I think we\u2019ve got to pull back and not just ask the question, \u201cWhat are our daughters or our wives thinking?\u201d but \u201cWhat are they feeling?\u201d Then process that and make that a part of that conversation. That\u2019s a good word. Thank you, David. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI should also let our listeners know\u2014we\u2019ve been making Abigail\u2019s book available this week to any <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listener who\u2014maybe, you\u2019ve been listening for a while; you\u2019ve benefitted from this program; you believe in the mission of FamilyLife; you want to see us effectively develop godly marriages and families, who change the world one home at a time\u2014you resonate with that mission; and you\u2019re ready to join the team of monthly Legacy Partners, who make all of this ministry possible. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA Legacy Partner is somebody who makes a monthly donation so that <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> can continue to sustain itself\u2014can grow, and expand, and reach more people, providing practical biblical help and hope for marriages and families. If you become a new Legacy Partner this week, we want to say, \u201cThank you,\u201d by doing two things. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFirst of all, we\u2019ll send you a copy of Abigail\u2019s book, the book we\u2019ve talked about this week: <em>(A)Typical Woman: Free, Whole, and Called in Christ<\/em>; and we\u2019ll send you a gift card so you and your spouse, or another couple you know, can attend one of our upcoming <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> marriage getaways. This gift card covers the registration cost, and it\u2019s our gift to you when you become a Legacy Partner. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019ve been thinking about going to a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>, or you know someone you\u2019d like to send as your guest, become a Legacy Partner today. We\u2019ll send you both the book and the gift card for the getaway. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com, click the button that says, \u201cDonate.\u201d All the information about becoming a Legacy Partner is available there; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and say: \u201cI\u2019m ready to join the team. I\u2019m ready to become a Legacy Partner.\u201d The number, again, is 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to hear about which aspect of the fruit of the Spirit may be the most important aspect to engage with if you\u2019re part of a blended family. We\u2019re going to hear from a husband in a blended family, Pastor Rob Bugh, who has got some thoughts on this subject. I think you\u2019re going to appreciate what he has to say. I hope you can tune in. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our hosts, Dave and Ann Wilson, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2019 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/305390","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=305390"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=305390"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=305390"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=305390"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=305390"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=305390"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=305390"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}