{"id":304816,"date":"2017-12-21T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2017-12-21T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/learning-how-to-love\/"},"modified":"2017-12-21T12:00:00","modified_gmt":"2017-12-21T17:00:00","slug":"learning-how-to-love","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/learning-how-to-love\/","title":{"rendered":"Learning How to Love"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Don and Sally Meredith, cofounders of FamilyLife, join their good friends Dennis and Barbara Rainey to reminisce about the good ol&#8217; days.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-12-21.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:33:41","filesize":"30.85M","filesize_raw":"32343566","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2833,2821,2862],"tags":[4086,2999,4682,6391,2877,6392,4126,5017,4406],"podcast_series":[8257],"cwp_profile":[3487],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-304816","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-godly-legacy","category-reaching-out","category-understanding-differences","tag-commitment","tag-familylife","tag-following-god","tag-founders","tag-marriage","tag-marriage-commitment","tag-ministry","tag-opposites","tag-opposites-attract","podcast_series-from-humble-beginnings","cwp_profile-don-and-sally-meredith","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/304816\/learning-how-to-love","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/304816\/learning-how-to-love","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"yJcBkMORzl\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/learning-how-to-love\/\">Learning How to Love<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/learning-how-to-love\/embed\/#?secret=yJcBkMORzl\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Learning How to Love&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"yJcBkMORzl\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-12-21.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-12-21.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>If you had met Don and Sally Meredith on the day they got married, you never would have said to yourself, \u201cI bet this couple will one day help start a marriage and family ministry that will go worldwide.\u201d One of the reasons for that, according to Sally Meredith, is because the two of them had very different priorities.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Don was a football fan. You get married on a Saturday; well, football is on a Saturday\u2014and we were in September, and football was in September. I\u2019m thinking about the wedding, and he\u2019s thinking about football. When we were even saying our vows, he\u2019s thinking, \u201cWe have to go find the Texas score.\u201d We get out in the car, and he starts racing through the radio. I said, \u201cWhat are you doing?\u201d He said, \u201cI\u2019m trying to find the score,\u201d and I said, \u201cThe score of what?!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Thursday, December 21<sup>st<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, how did Don and Sally Meredith go from a rocky beginning and some rocky early years of marriage to help start the ministry of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>? They share with us their story today. Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Thursday edition. One of the highlights of the year for us was to get a chance to sit down and have an extended conversation with a couple who was here at the very beginning.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>That\u2019s right; Barbara is closely connected with this couple. In fact, as you\u2019re about to hear, Sally Meredith led Barbara to faith in Jesus Christ when Barbara was a college student at the University of Arkansas. Sally\u2019s husband, Don, had a great impact in my life, as a college student, as well, as I was a junior at the University of Arkansas\u2014and had a great deal to do with my development as a young leader. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd [Don] ultimately helped start FamilyLife and what has become a ministry that is in 103 countries around the world and heard all over the United States through this broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>They were in town, not long ago. We sat down in the studio just to revisit the early days of FamilyLife. In fact, we started off our conversation with Don and Sally Meredith by playing a portion of an interview we did maybe 20 years ago, where Sally shared about knowing both of you as college students.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Don and Sally Meredith are well-known for speaking about marriage and family. He is the founder and president of Christian Family Life and\u2014well, let\u2019s listen to that conversation we had.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Sally, do you remember leading Barbara to Christ?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>I sure do\u2014in my kitchen \/ very small little kitchen. Barbara was really ready to receive the Lord; so, yes, it was special.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And it was a life-changing experience for her. Then, they did our pre-marriage counseling. Now, we really ought to go to <em>that<\/em> story.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>That was major. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Paul\u2019s Valley, Oklahoma\u2014Barbara and I had just been hanging out as friends, and I\u2019ll never forget this musty hotel room. I think I was seated on the edge of the bed in that musty hotel room; Barbara was seated in a chair; and there was Don on the other bed, looking us both in the eye. He said, \u201cYou need to decide whether you\u2019re going to get married or not.\u201d And I go: \u201cMarried! We\u2019ve just been friends!\u201d He was right. He had the wisdom to really look at what God was doing in our lives and call us to a spiritual commitment called marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Don, what did you see?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Well, you know, I was just thinking\u2014as we talk about marriage today, and I talk about a faith relationship, and how God sovereignly brings people together\u2014and I really felt that about Barbara and Dennis. It\u2019s just great now to look back and just see the confirmation of that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>That\u2019s one of Barbara\u2019s favorite stories to tell, Sally\/Don, because she says, as she was sitting in that chair, listening to you say, \u201cI think you guys need to decide whether you\u2019re going to get married or not,\u201d she was absolutely\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>\u2014like a deer in the headlights. I will never forget how shocked, taken aback, surprised, unprepared I was for that question. I didn\u2019t want to breathe \/ I didn\u2019t want to move; I sure didn\u2019t want to look at <em>him<\/em>. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You\u2019d had the thought; hadn\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>No; I had not had the thought.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Neither one of us had the thought.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Come on, you hadn\u2019t even entertained for a second\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>No sir.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong><em>Seriously<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Seriously! He was my best friend!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I get that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>And I didn\u2019t want to mess up the friendship by talking about dating and all that stuff\u2014that was messy.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I thought girls have that thought with all of their best friends\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Well, I had that thought with Dennis Rainey when I first met him\u2014like three or four years prior\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014in college.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>\u2014in college. I remember thinking: \u201cI\u2019d kind of like to go out with him. He would be kind of fun to date.\u201d You know, mind runs down the road a little bit; but he would never ask me out, so I checked him off the list. That was the end of it! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It took Don Meredith getting me in a musty hotel room, cornering me and saying, \u201cYou have to call for the question.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You had never thought\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Uh-uh; no.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Can I jump in here?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes; jump in!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>My thought was well before any of them. I had put Barbara and Dennis together when Barbara was dating somebody else.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Did you really?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Yes; and I kept saying to Don: \u201cThat\u2019s the wrong guy,\u201d and \u201cI think that it\u2019s Dennis Rainey and Barbara\u2014that they would be a good couple.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>I don\u2019t think I ever knew that. Did you know that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Matchmaker. You\u2019re the matchmaker.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>But I thought about it <em>many<\/em> times when you were dating the other guy.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Well, you guys are celebrating your 50<sup>th<\/sup> anniversary this year. I know we just took a hard turn from back to when you did the pre-marriage counseling for us. I just wanted to ask you both this question: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cIf you had a couple, who were starting their marriage out, what would be the single best piece of advice you could give that couple from your 50 years of experience in marriage?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Your decision that you\u2019re considering today\u2014it\u2019s a faith commitment, and it\u2019s not a feelings commitment. You need to understand what a faith commitment is.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Sally?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>That\u2019s a hard question; because when we got married, nobody ever asked us those kinds of questions. We just\u2014you know, we were just in the process of dating and the next step is getting married\u2014and then you find out who each other is\u2014and it\u2019s difficult. You usually either marry the opposite or you marry somebody that you think: \u201cWhoa! What did I marry?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You started off\u2014it was rocky.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Oh, it was very rocky. We didn\u2019t know each other, but we did know the Lord. I\u2019ve often told people what saved our marriage was Jesus Christ Himself. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWith that said, we were as opposite as they come\u2014we don\u2019t think alike; we don\u2019t act alike; we don\u2019t reason alike\u2014there is <em>nothing<\/em> alike about us, except the Lord.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So the drift to isolation in your marriage wasn\u2019t a drift, it was kind of a fast-moving current. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Within 12 hours, on the honeymoon, it was drifting badly at that point.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Was there a crisis point, where you really wondered if it would survive?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Yes; within 12 hours. [Laughter] No; I\u2019m not kidding. Don was a football fan. You get marred on a Saturday; well, football is on Saturday\u2014we were in September, and football is in September. I\u2019m thinking about the wedding, and he\u2019s thinking about football. When we were even saying our vows, he\u2019s thinking, \u201cWe have to go find the Texas score.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo we get out in the car, and he starts racing through the radio. I said, \u201cWhat are you doing?\u201d He said, \u201cI\u2019m trying to find the score,\u201d and I said, \u201cThe score of what?!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is right after the wedding?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Oh yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014as you\u2019re driving away.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>\u2014as we\u2019re driving away from the church. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Most guys are not thinking about how Texas is doing on their honeymoon night.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>No.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>I switched gears pretty quick\u2014[Laughter]\u2014but at that moment, I was just doing it quickly to find that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes; I understand that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Sally, you\u2019ve written a book called <em>Overcoming Woundedness. <\/em>In this book, you tell a story\u2014or at least hint at a story\u2014that your father struggled with anger issues. You, as a young lady, grew up in a home where a father was angry.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Yes; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>That undoubtedly wounded you, as a young lady, who also started out her marriage\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014you know?\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014in the midst of that. What exactly would take place in your home, growing up?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Well, my dad was very critical and very negative. He wasn\u2019t a believer, in any way, shape, or form. I grew up with every swear word that you can imagine. He was mistreated by his dad and was angry at that, so I kind of grew up with that. I never felt love from my dad. Mom was very calm\u2014the only kind of person that could be married to him. I grew up feeling like, \u201cI don\u2019t ever want to become like my dad.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd guess what? I did become like my dad. I realized that I had the same personality \/ I had the same tendency to anger, and frustration, and criticalness that my dad had; and Don married that. I was thinking: \u201cOkay; I\u2019m a Christian. I\u2019ve conquered that.\u201d Well, in marriage, that kind of stuff really comes out. Don got the brunt of my dad in me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI talk about it in the book\u2014about dysfunction. We bring our dysfunctions into our families. I didn\u2019t think I was bringing it in, but I brought it in full-square. Don, being a very calm, easygoing guy, would look at me and think, \u201cWhy are you so angry?!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI understood the Christian life, and I was really even understanding the ministry of the Holy Spirit; but what I\u2019m saying is\u2014I brought my baggage into my marriage. We all bring our baggage in\u2014and we bring our dysfunction from our moms \/ we bring our dysfunction from our dads. If we don\u2019t really teach our children that they\u2019re bringing their dysfunction of <em>us<\/em> into their families, people are caught off guard by who we are and how we\u2019ve grown up. We try to hide those things, and we can\u2019t; because they finally just come out.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We all have bags; don\u2019t we?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>We have a lot of bags.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And some are prettier-looking bags than others, some are a little more nuanced, some are bulging at the seams.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>But when you unpack them\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014it\u2019s ugly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>There\u2019s all kinds of toxicity that everybody brings into a relationship. The ability to recognize that and then to know what to with it is key to any marriage working out; isn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Right; yes; oh yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Don, the first time you realized you\u2019d married an angry woman?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Well, it was a shock. Frankly, I said, \u201cGod, if You designed marriage, can You make it work?\u201d I mean, those first two or three weeks, you finally realize that it\u2019s not going to be as easy as I thought. But then, I was enough mature that I really wanted to ask God, \u201cGod, how do you love an angry person?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember opening the Scripture for the first time after I got married and, sure enough, in Genesis, Chapter 1, it lays out three purposes for God\u2019s marriage. He wants you to reflect His image\u2014to reproduce that image in your children and in your family. I began to say, \u201cHow am I going to do that?\u201d I learned very quickly that I was going to have to approach her with softness, and I was going to have to provoke her to good things. I saw that I could affect her by how I responded, and it was a real learning experience.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>She had been used to an angry man responding to her, and you didn\u2019t respond that way.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Not most times. [Laughter] Believe me\u2014I can remember a few responses.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>A couple of times.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>But that\u2019s not any fun. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs Christians, we\u2019re expecting the best; so we really got busy talking about that at the time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>And I just remember when he came home to me one day and he said, \u201cI\u2019m really learning some stuff in Scripture that\u2019s really changing my heart,\u201d\u2014and again, just going back to he loved the Lord and I loved the Lord\u2014and this was\u2014he couldn\u2019t have said a better thing to me, that he was learning from Scripture what it was to be a husband and how to love a wife well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd then I thought, \u201cWow, I guess I better start learning that there\u2019s some stuff in Scripture that I need to be learning as well.\u201d He responded to me with kindness instead of with rebuke, which is what we normally do\u2014we do that with our kids \/ we do it with everybody\u2014but he responded in kindness. I just backed up, because it took me by surprise\u2014I just wept. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat was probably within the first\/second year of our marriage. I was just thinking, \u201cWell, you know, maybe we married the wrong one,\u201d and he said: \u201cNo; that\u2019s not an option\u2014divorce is not an option. We\u2019re going to find out what God wants us to do.\u201d He really delved in the Scripture. Praise God for men who delve into Scripture! That really began to change his heart and, as a responsive wife, to change mine.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, I think it\u2019s significant, too, that he came to you and said, \u201cI\u2019m seeing some things in Scripture that are really having an impact on me,\u201d rather than, \u201cI\u2019m reading some things in Scripture that\u2014[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>\u2014\u201cthat you need to learn.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014\u201cthat I would like to read to you!\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That\u2019s our tendency; right?\u2014is to read those things and to go, \u201cHere, read this!\u201d But he was shrewd enough to say: \u201cYou know what? I\u2019m reading Scripture to say, \u2018Lord, what do I need to do?\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd I think that had to be <em>powerful<\/em> for you, as a wife, to know: \u201cOh, he\u2019s growing. I\u2019d better keep up with him.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Yes; yes. That\u2019s exactly right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>When I read Ephesians 5, that changed my life forever about this issue; because it says, \u201cHusbands, love your wives as Christ loves the church that He might sanctify and present her back holy and blameless, without spot or wrinkle.\u201d That\u2019s what caught me, because we really struggled quite a bit that first fall. I said: \u201cGod, I\u2019m going to try You out. The next time she gets upset and raises her voice, I\u2019m going to remember that and I\u2019m going to find out: \u2018Will that affect her?\u2019\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>\u201cWill it work?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>And boy, I mean, to this day\u2014every time, it works. I don\u2019t care how mad she gets\u2014of course, that usually includes me asking forgiveness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what faith marriage is\u2014it\u2019s believing God instead of following your senses, uncontrollably. And\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>And I think we put each other on performance: \u201cHe needs to perform the way I want him to,\u201d \/ \u201cI need to perform the way he wants me to,\u201d rather than asking the Lord, \u201cGive me insight into this gift You\u2019ve given me.\u201d So, that whole Genesis 2 passage is really accepting your spouse as a gift from God, completely.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo he needed to\u2014and he did\u2014accept me as a gift, with my baggage. How freeing is that, you know?\u2014to be accepted with your baggage, not without it\u2014or not, \u201cWhen you change, I\u2019ll accept you,\u201d but accepting you, with your baggage, is so important. And vice versa\u2014Don wasn\u2019t completely perfect, so I needed to, as well, accept him with the baggage that he also brought into the marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So where did the two of you meet?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>On Campus Crusade staff.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You had both gone to college \/ you\u2019d both been involved with Campus Crusade in college; you\u2019d both joined staff, and that\u2019s where you noticed each other.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>A friend of mine had roomed with him and said, \u201cI think I\u2019d like to fit you up with Sally Hill\u201d\u2014at the time. He said, \u201cOkay.\u201d So, it was a blind date for <em>me<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And how long from the blind date to the engagement?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>A couple of months.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>How did you propose to her?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Well, I\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>\u2014over the phone.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You proposed over the phone.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob and Barbara: <\/strong>Doesn\u2019t that sound familiar? [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You [Dennis] proposed over the phone as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Did Dennis do that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>He did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Oh, it was highly romantic\u2014I called her at two a.m.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>\u2014my time. It was midnight your time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes; yes. And this is not long after Don gave me the exhortation, \u201cYou guys need to decide whether you\u2019re going to get married or not.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI decided I wanted to marry her; so I called her on the phone. She said, \u201cYes,\u201d and then I wired her flowers the next day to make sure she was awake when she said \u201cYes.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m laughing at our stories here; but I\u2019m also thinking of how God used\u2014Sally, your woundedness, and Don\u2019s pursuit of you and his pursuit of God to find out how to love somebody who\u2019s wounded to overcome that woundedness. Out of that relationship came the study of Scripture to learn how to love\u2014to know how to be a husband \/ to know how to be a wife\u2014to know how to do this thing called marriage. If God did design marriage and family, then He knows how to make it work. And ultimately, that led you guys to start Christian Family Life and, then, help start FamilyLife, back in 1976.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes; in fact, we can really say that your study of Scripture to figure out how to do marriage has borne fruit in the lives of every couple that\u2019s attended a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> getaway over the last 40-plus years; because what you figured out and shared with others has been used by God in the lives of hundreds of thousands \/ millions of couples, at this point.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014in over a hundred countries around the world. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd of course, you guys have had ministry in many countries, as well, just personally; but through your training of us\u2014the free marriage counseling and then helping create the content that ultimately became the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway for couples\u2014I mean, people don\u2019t realize, when they show up at the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>, what a miracle it is that that conference has been around for 41 years!\u00a0 Now, we\u2019ve changed it, obviously; but we haven\u2019t changed the blueprints\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014haven\u2019t changed the Scripture.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>But it came out of your [Sally\u2019s] woundedness\/your brokenness\u2014Don, your feelings of helplessness to know how to love an angry woman.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, and a couple that started their marriage, picking the hotel for the honeymoon based on the height of the antenna so we could find out if Texas won the game\u2014the fact that we\u2019re still here talking about it is pretty amazing; don\u2019t you think? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>There is a God, and He is a part of redeeming us; is that not the case?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>And He has a sense of humor.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>He has a great sense of humor.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>You know, I want to say one thing about starting marriage ministry. When Don came to me and said, \u201cSally, I think we need to start a marriage ministry,\u201d\u2014nobody was doing it in those days \/ there was no help out there. I looked at him and I said, \u201cYou have to be kidding me!\u201d And he said, \u201cNo; I\u2019m not kidding.\u201d\u00a0 And I said, \u201cWhy would we start a marriage ministry when we\u2019ve been in such a deep rut ourselves and getting out of it?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd he said, \u201cSally, if we\u2019re in a deep rut, don\u2019t you know that there are hundreds out there that are in a deep rut and they don\u2019t know how to get out?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat was so pivotal; because when we started Christian Family Life, and then FamilyLife, our marriage wasn\u2019t perfect. We had a long ways still to go; but we knew that we had some answers, and the answers were in Scripture. They weren\u2019t answers from us\u2014we didn\u2019t have them. But when God gives a blueprint, He wants us to follow it; because He knows that, if we do, we\u2019re going to have a successful marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, 50 years later, we followed the blueprint, early on\u2014praise the Lord. I think the neatest thing is we have <em>never<\/em> put ourselves on a pedestal. We\u2019ve never said, \u201cHey, look at our marriage and follow it.\u201d We can\u2019t! We just say: \u201cLook at Scripture. Look at God, and follow Him,\u201d and that\u2019s\u2014I think that\u2019s the crux of it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, again, we\u2019ve been listening to the first part of a conversation that we had earlier this year with the co-founders of FamilyLife, Don and Sally Meredith. You look back at where their marriage was when they got started, it\u2019s hard to think that they would have had the impact that they\u2019ve had in marriage ministry for more than five decades.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And you know, Bob, that\u2019s what Jesus Christ came to do\u2014He came to transform broken, selfish, me-first sinners, who need to be redeemed from themselves, so that they can make two people become one and merge together in oneness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what we\u2019re about, here, on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> every day. I just turn to you, as a listener, at this point, and if you liked that message of what we\u2019re trying to do here\u2014you like it that we\u2019re grounded in Scripture \/ we\u2019re focused on the gospel of Jesus Christ, introducing people to Him\u2014this is a good time for you to step forward and make a generous gift to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> to keep us standing strong, here, at yearend and as we move into a new year.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, and in fact, our friend, Michelle Hill, has been with us all month long, keeping us up to date on the progress toward the matching-gift opportunity that we have available. She\u2019s here again today. Hello, Michelle!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Hi Bob, today is BIG PROGRESS day! \u2026and I say big progress because thanks to the prayers of folks like Surfer Joe in California, we\u2019ve crossed the million dollar mark. Because over five thousand of you have joined us, today we\u2019re a quarter of the way to our goal! \uf04a Of course, we still have a long way to go\u2026but I know Surfer Joe\u2019s going to be praying for us, and I hope you will too. So, keep praying, and keeping giving as God leads\u2026Bob?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And let me just say\u2014if you\u2019re a regular listener, we\u2019d love to have you join the mission of FamilyLife to help effectively develop godly marriages and families. You can make a yearend contribution and have your donation doubled when you go to FamilyLifeToday.com and donate, online, or when you call 1-800-FL-TODAY to donate. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOr you can mail your donation to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; and our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to hear more of our conversation with Don and Sally Meredith, talking about the early days of FamilyLife. We\u2019ll hear how the Merediths and the Raineys first got to know one another, back in the late 1960s. That all comes up tomorrow. I hope you can tune in for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2017 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:33:41"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["30.85M"],"filesize_raw":["32343566"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-304816.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-304816.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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and Sally Meredith, cofounders of FamilyLife, join their good friends Dennis and Barbara Rainey to reminisce about the good ol' days.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-12-21.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>If you had met Don and Sally Meredith on the day they got married, you never would have said to yourself, \u201cI bet this couple will one day help start a marriage and family ministry that will go worldwide.\u201d One of the reasons for that, according to Sally Meredith, is because the two of them had very different priorities.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Don was a football fan. You get married on a Saturday; well, football is on a Saturday\u2014and we were in September, and football was in September. I\u2019m thinking about the wedding, and he\u2019s thinking about football. When we were even saying our vows, he\u2019s thinking, \u201cWe have to go find the Texas score.\u201d We get out in the car, and he starts racing through the radio. I said, \u201cWhat are you doing?\u201d He said, \u201cI\u2019m trying to find the score,\u201d and I said, \u201cThe score of what?!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Thursday, December 21<sup>st<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, how did Don and Sally Meredith go from a rocky beginning and some rocky early years of marriage to help start the ministry of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>? They share with us their story today. Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Thursday edition. One of the highlights of the year for us was to get a chance to sit down and have an extended conversation with a couple who was here at the very beginning.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>That\u2019s right; Barbara is closely connected with this couple. In fact, as you\u2019re about to hear, Sally Meredith led Barbara to faith in Jesus Christ when Barbara was a college student at the University of Arkansas. Sally\u2019s husband, Don, had a great impact in my life, as a college student, as well, as I was a junior at the University of Arkansas\u2014and had a great deal to do with my development as a young leader. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd [Don] ultimately helped start FamilyLife and what has become a ministry that is in 103 countries around the world and heard all over the United States through this broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>They were in town, not long ago. We sat down in the studio just to revisit the early days of FamilyLife. In fact, we started off our conversation with Don and Sally Meredith by playing a portion of an interview we did maybe 20 years ago, where Sally shared about knowing both of you as college students.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Don and Sally Meredith are well-known for speaking about marriage and family. He is the founder and president of Christian Family Life and\u2014well, let\u2019s listen to that conversation we had.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Sally, do you remember leading Barbara to Christ?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>I sure do\u2014in my kitchen \/ very small little kitchen. Barbara was really ready to receive the Lord; so, yes, it was special.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And it was a life-changing experience for her. Then, they did our pre-marriage counseling. Now, we really ought to go to <em>that<\/em> story.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>That was major. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Paul\u2019s Valley, Oklahoma\u2014Barbara and I had just been hanging out as friends, and I\u2019ll never forget this musty hotel room. I think I was seated on the edge of the bed in that musty hotel room; Barbara was seated in a chair; and there was Don on the other bed, looking us both in the eye. He said, \u201cYou need to decide whether you\u2019re going to get married or not.\u201d And I go: \u201cMarried! We\u2019ve just been friends!\u201d He was right. He had the wisdom to really look at what God was doing in our lives and call us to a spiritual commitment called marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Don, what did you see?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Well, you know, I was just thinking\u2014as we talk about marriage today, and I talk about a faith relationship, and how God sovereignly brings people together\u2014and I really felt that about Barbara and Dennis. It\u2019s just great now to look back and just see the confirmation of that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>That\u2019s one of Barbara\u2019s favorite stories to tell, Sally\/Don, because she says, as she was sitting in that chair, listening to you say, \u201cI think you guys need to decide whether you\u2019re going to get married or not,\u201d she was absolutely\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>\u2014like a deer in the headlights. I will never forget how shocked, taken aback, surprised, unprepared I was for that question. I didn\u2019t want to breathe \/ I didn\u2019t want to move; I sure didn\u2019t want to look at <em>him<\/em>. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You\u2019d had the thought; hadn\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>No; I had not had the thought.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Neither one of us had the thought.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Come on, you hadn\u2019t even entertained for a second\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>No sir.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong><em>Seriously<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Seriously! He was my best friend!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I get that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>And I didn\u2019t want to mess up the friendship by talking about dating and all that stuff\u2014that was messy.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I thought girls have that thought with all of their best friends\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Well, I had that thought with Dennis Rainey when I first met him\u2014like three or four years prior\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014in college.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>\u2014in college. I remember thinking: \u201cI\u2019d kind of like to go out with him. He would be kind of fun to date.\u201d You know, mind runs down the road a little bit; but he would never ask me out, so I checked him off the list. That was the end of it! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It took Don Meredith getting me in a musty hotel room, cornering me and saying, \u201cYou have to call for the question.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You had never thought\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Uh-uh; no.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Can I jump in here?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes; jump in!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>My thought was well before any of them. I had put Barbara and Dennis together when Barbara was dating somebody else.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Did you really?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Yes; and I kept saying to Don: \u201cThat\u2019s the wrong guy,\u201d and \u201cI think that it\u2019s Dennis Rainey and Barbara\u2014that they would be a good couple.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>I don\u2019t think I ever knew that. Did you know that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Matchmaker. You\u2019re the matchmaker.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>But I thought about it <em>many<\/em> times when you were dating the other guy.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Well, you guys are celebrating your 50<sup>th<\/sup> anniversary this year. I know we just took a hard turn from back to when you did the pre-marriage counseling for us. I just wanted to ask you both this question: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cIf you had a couple, who were starting their marriage out, what would be the single best piece of advice you could give that couple from your 50 years of experience in marriage?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Your decision that you\u2019re considering today\u2014it\u2019s a faith commitment, and it\u2019s not a feelings commitment. You need to understand what a faith commitment is.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Sally?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>That\u2019s a hard question; because when we got married, nobody ever asked us those kinds of questions. We just\u2014you know, we were just in the process of dating and the next step is getting married\u2014and then you find out who each other is\u2014and it\u2019s difficult. You usually either marry the opposite or you marry somebody that you think: \u201cWhoa! What did I marry?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You started off\u2014it was rocky.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Oh, it was very rocky. We didn\u2019t know each other, but we did know the Lord. I\u2019ve often told people what saved our marriage was Jesus Christ Himself. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWith that said, we were as opposite as they come\u2014we don\u2019t think alike; we don\u2019t act alike; we don\u2019t reason alike\u2014there is <em>nothing<\/em> alike about us, except the Lord.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So the drift to isolation in your marriage wasn\u2019t a drift, it was kind of a fast-moving current. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Within 12 hours, on the honeymoon, it was drifting badly at that point.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Was there a crisis point, where you really wondered if it would survive?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Yes; within 12 hours. [Laughter] No; I\u2019m not kidding. Don was a football fan. You get marred on a Saturday; well, football is on Saturday\u2014we were in September, and football is in September. I\u2019m thinking about the wedding, and he\u2019s thinking about football. When we were even saying our vows, he\u2019s thinking, \u201cWe have to go find the Texas score.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo we get out in the car, and he starts racing through the radio. I said, \u201cWhat are you doing?\u201d He said, \u201cI\u2019m trying to find the score,\u201d and I said, \u201cThe score of what?!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is right after the wedding?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Oh yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014as you\u2019re driving away.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>\u2014as we\u2019re driving away from the church. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Most guys are not thinking about how Texas is doing on their honeymoon night.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>No.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>I switched gears pretty quick\u2014[Laughter]\u2014but at that moment, I was just doing it quickly to find that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes; I understand that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Sally, you\u2019ve written a book called <em>Overcoming Woundedness. <\/em>In this book, you tell a story\u2014or at least hint at a story\u2014that your father struggled with anger issues. You, as a young lady, grew up in a home where a father was angry.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Yes; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>That undoubtedly wounded you, as a young lady, who also started out her marriage\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014you know?\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014in the midst of that. What exactly would take place in your home, growing up?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Well, my dad was very critical and very negative. He wasn\u2019t a believer, in any way, shape, or form. I grew up with every swear word that you can imagine. He was mistreated by his dad and was angry at that, so I kind of grew up with that. I never felt love from my dad. Mom was very calm\u2014the only kind of person that could be married to him. I grew up feeling like, \u201cI don\u2019t ever want to become like my dad.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd guess what? I did become like my dad. I realized that I had the same personality \/ I had the same tendency to anger, and frustration, and criticalness that my dad had; and Don married that. I was thinking: \u201cOkay; I\u2019m a Christian. I\u2019ve conquered that.\u201d Well, in marriage, that kind of stuff really comes out. Don got the brunt of my dad in me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI talk about it in the book\u2014about dysfunction. We bring our dysfunctions into our families. I didn\u2019t think I was bringing it in, but I brought it in full-square. Don, being a very calm, easygoing guy, would look at me and think, \u201cWhy are you so angry?!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI understood the Christian life, and I was really even understanding the ministry of the Holy Spirit; but what I\u2019m saying is\u2014I brought my baggage into my marriage. We all bring our baggage in\u2014and we bring our dysfunction from our moms \/ we bring our dysfunction from our dads. If we don\u2019t really teach our children that they\u2019re bringing their dysfunction of <em>us<\/em> into their families, people are caught off guard by who we are and how we\u2019ve grown up. We try to hide those things, and we can\u2019t; because they finally just come out.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We all have bags; don\u2019t we?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>We have a lot of bags.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And some are prettier-looking bags than others, some are a little more nuanced, some are bulging at the seams.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>But when you unpack them\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014it\u2019s ugly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>There\u2019s all kinds of toxicity that everybody brings into a relationship. The ability to recognize that and then to know what to with it is key to any marriage working out; isn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Right; yes; oh yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Don, the first time you realized you\u2019d married an angry woman?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Well, it was a shock. Frankly, I said, \u201cGod, if You designed marriage, can You make it work?\u201d I mean, those first two or three weeks, you finally realize that it\u2019s not going to be as easy as I thought. But then, I was enough mature that I really wanted to ask God, \u201cGod, how do you love an angry person?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember opening the Scripture for the first time after I got married and, sure enough, in Genesis, Chapter 1, it lays out three purposes for God\u2019s marriage. He wants you to reflect His image\u2014to reproduce that image in your children and in your family. I began to say, \u201cHow am I going to do that?\u201d I learned very quickly that I was going to have to approach her with softness, and I was going to have to provoke her to good things. I saw that I could affect her by how I responded, and it was a real learning experience.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>She had been used to an angry man responding to her, and you didn\u2019t respond that way.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Not most times. [Laughter] Believe me\u2014I can remember a few responses.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>A couple of times.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>But that\u2019s not any fun. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs Christians, we\u2019re expecting the best; so we really got busy talking about that at the time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>And I just remember when he came home to me one day and he said, \u201cI\u2019m really learning some stuff in Scripture that\u2019s really changing my heart,\u201d\u2014and again, just going back to he loved the Lord and I loved the Lord\u2014and this was\u2014he couldn\u2019t have said a better thing to me, that he was learning from Scripture what it was to be a husband and how to love a wife well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd then I thought, \u201cWow, I guess I better start learning that there\u2019s some stuff in Scripture that I need to be learning as well.\u201d He responded to me with kindness instead of with rebuke, which is what we normally do\u2014we do that with our kids \/ we do it with everybody\u2014but he responded in kindness. I just backed up, because it took me by surprise\u2014I just wept. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat was probably within the first\/second year of our marriage. I was just thinking, \u201cWell, you know, maybe we married the wrong one,\u201d and he said: \u201cNo; that\u2019s not an option\u2014divorce is not an option. We\u2019re going to find out what God wants us to do.\u201d He really delved in the Scripture. Praise God for men who delve into Scripture! That really began to change his heart and, as a responsive wife, to change mine.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, I think it\u2019s significant, too, that he came to you and said, \u201cI\u2019m seeing some things in Scripture that are really having an impact on me,\u201d rather than, \u201cI\u2019m reading some things in Scripture that\u2014[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>\u2014\u201cthat you need to learn.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014\u201cthat I would like to read to you!\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That\u2019s our tendency; right?\u2014is to read those things and to go, \u201cHere, read this!\u201d But he was shrewd enough to say: \u201cYou know what? I\u2019m reading Scripture to say, \u2018Lord, what do I need to do?\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd I think that had to be <em>powerful<\/em> for you, as a wife, to know: \u201cOh, he\u2019s growing. I\u2019d better keep up with him.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Yes; yes. That\u2019s exactly right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>When I read Ephesians 5, that changed my life forever about this issue; because it says, \u201cHusbands, love your wives as Christ loves the church that He might sanctify and present her back holy and blameless, without spot or wrinkle.\u201d That\u2019s what caught me, because we really struggled quite a bit that first fall. I said: \u201cGod, I\u2019m going to try You out. The next time she gets upset and raises her voice, I\u2019m going to remember that and I\u2019m going to find out: \u2018Will that affect her?\u2019\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>\u201cWill it work?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>And boy, I mean, to this day\u2014every time, it works. I don\u2019t care how mad she gets\u2014of course, that usually includes me asking forgiveness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what faith marriage is\u2014it\u2019s believing God instead of following your senses, uncontrollably. And\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>And I think we put each other on performance: \u201cHe needs to perform the way I want him to,\u201d \/ \u201cI need to perform the way he wants me to,\u201d rather than asking the Lord, \u201cGive me insight into this gift You\u2019ve given me.\u201d So, that whole Genesis 2 passage is really accepting your spouse as a gift from God, completely.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo he needed to\u2014and he did\u2014accept me as a gift, with my baggage. How freeing is that, you know?\u2014to be accepted with your baggage, not without it\u2014or not, \u201cWhen you change, I\u2019ll accept you,\u201d but accepting you, with your baggage, is so important. And vice versa\u2014Don wasn\u2019t completely perfect, so I needed to, as well, accept him with the baggage that he also brought into the marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So where did the two of you meet?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>On Campus Crusade staff.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You had both gone to college \/ you\u2019d both been involved with Campus Crusade in college; you\u2019d both joined staff, and that\u2019s where you noticed each other.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>A friend of mine had roomed with him and said, \u201cI think I\u2019d like to fit you up with Sally Hill\u201d\u2014at the time. He said, \u201cOkay.\u201d So, it was a blind date for <em>me<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And how long from the blind date to the engagement?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>A couple of months.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>How did you propose to her?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Well, I\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>\u2014over the phone.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You proposed over the phone.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob and Barbara: <\/strong>Doesn\u2019t that sound familiar? [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You [Dennis] proposed over the phone as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Don: <\/strong>Did Dennis do that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>He did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Oh, it was highly romantic\u2014I called her at two a.m.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>\u2014my time. It was midnight your time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes; yes. And this is not long after Don gave me the exhortation, \u201cYou guys need to decide whether you\u2019re going to get married or not.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI decided I wanted to marry her; so I called her on the phone. She said, \u201cYes,\u201d and then I wired her flowers the next day to make sure she was awake when she said \u201cYes.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m laughing at our stories here; but I\u2019m also thinking of how God used\u2014Sally, your woundedness, and Don\u2019s pursuit of you and his pursuit of God to find out how to love somebody who\u2019s wounded to overcome that woundedness. Out of that relationship came the study of Scripture to learn how to love\u2014to know how to be a husband \/ to know how to be a wife\u2014to know how to do this thing called marriage. If God did design marriage and family, then He knows how to make it work. And ultimately, that led you guys to start Christian Family Life and, then, help start FamilyLife, back in 1976.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes; in fact, we can really say that your study of Scripture to figure out how to do marriage has borne fruit in the lives of every couple that\u2019s attended a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> getaway over the last 40-plus years; because what you figured out and shared with others has been used by God in the lives of hundreds of thousands \/ millions of couples, at this point.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014in over a hundred countries around the world. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd of course, you guys have had ministry in many countries, as well, just personally; but through your training of us\u2014the free marriage counseling and then helping create the content that ultimately became the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway for couples\u2014I mean, people don\u2019t realize, when they show up at the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>, what a miracle it is that that conference has been around for 41 years!\u00a0 Now, we\u2019ve changed it, obviously; but we haven\u2019t changed the blueprints\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014haven\u2019t changed the Scripture.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>But it came out of your [Sally\u2019s] woundedness\/your brokenness\u2014Don, your feelings of helplessness to know how to love an angry woman.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, and a couple that started their marriage, picking the hotel for the honeymoon based on the height of the antenna so we could find out if Texas won the game\u2014the fact that we\u2019re still here talking about it is pretty amazing; don\u2019t you think? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>There is a God, and He is a part of redeeming us; is that not the case?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>And He has a sense of humor.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>He has a great sense of humor.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sally: <\/strong>You know, I want to say one thing about starting marriage ministry. When Don came to me and said, \u201cSally, I think we need to start a marriage ministry,\u201d\u2014nobody was doing it in those days \/ there was no help out there. I looked at him and I said, \u201cYou have to be kidding me!\u201d And he said, \u201cNo; I\u2019m not kidding.\u201d\u00a0 And I said, \u201cWhy would we start a marriage ministry when we\u2019ve been in such a deep rut ourselves and getting out of it?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd he said, \u201cSally, if we\u2019re in a deep rut, don\u2019t you know that there are hundreds out there that are in a deep rut and they don\u2019t know how to get out?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat was so pivotal; because when we started Christian Family Life, and then FamilyLife, our marriage wasn\u2019t perfect. We had a long ways still to go; but we knew that we had some answers, and the answers were in Scripture. They weren\u2019t answers from us\u2014we didn\u2019t have them. But when God gives a blueprint, He wants us to follow it; because He knows that, if we do, we\u2019re going to have a successful marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, 50 years later, we followed the blueprint, early on\u2014praise the Lord. I think the neatest thing is we have <em>never<\/em> put ourselves on a pedestal. We\u2019ve never said, \u201cHey, look at our marriage and follow it.\u201d We can\u2019t! We just say: \u201cLook at Scripture. Look at God, and follow Him,\u201d and that\u2019s\u2014I think that\u2019s the crux of it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, again, we\u2019ve been listening to the first part of a conversation that we had earlier this year with the co-founders of FamilyLife, Don and Sally Meredith. You look back at where their marriage was when they got started, it\u2019s hard to think that they would have had the impact that they\u2019ve had in marriage ministry for more than five decades.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And you know, Bob, that\u2019s what Jesus Christ came to do\u2014He came to transform broken, selfish, me-first sinners, who need to be redeemed from themselves, so that they can make two people become one and merge together in oneness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what we\u2019re about, here, on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> every day. I just turn to you, as a listener, at this point, and if you liked that message of what we\u2019re trying to do here\u2014you like it that we\u2019re grounded in Scripture \/ we\u2019re focused on the gospel of Jesus Christ, introducing people to Him\u2014this is a good time for you to step forward and make a generous gift to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> to keep us standing strong, here, at yearend and as we move into a new year.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, and in fact, our friend, Michelle Hill, has been with us all month long, keeping us up to date on the progress toward the matching-gift opportunity that we have available. She\u2019s here again today. Hello, Michelle!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Hi Bob, today is BIG PROGRESS day! \u2026and I say big progress because thanks to the prayers of folks like Surfer Joe in California, we\u2019ve crossed the million dollar mark. Because over five thousand of you have joined us, today we\u2019re a quarter of the way to our goal! \uf04a Of course, we still have a long way to go\u2026but I know Surfer Joe\u2019s going to be praying for us, and I hope you will too. So, keep praying, and keeping giving as God leads\u2026Bob?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And let me just say\u2014if you\u2019re a regular listener, we\u2019d love to have you join the mission of FamilyLife to help effectively develop godly marriages and families. You can make a yearend contribution and have your donation doubled when you go to FamilyLifeToday.com and donate, online, or when you call 1-800-FL-TODAY to donate. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOr you can mail your donation to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; and our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to hear more of our conversation with Don and Sally Meredith, talking about the early days of FamilyLife. We\u2019ll hear how the Merediths and the Raineys first got to know one another, back in the late 1960s. That all comes up tomorrow. I hope you can tune in for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2017 FamilyLife. 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