{"id":304770,"date":"2017-11-20T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2017-11-20T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/parenting-rainey-style\/"},"modified":"2017-11-20T12:00:00","modified_gmt":"2017-11-20T17:00:00","slug":"parenting-rainey-style","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/parenting-rainey-style\/","title":{"rendered":"Parenting, Rainey Style"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Raising children in the limelight is diifficult. For Dennis and Barbara Rainey, the remedy was to live humbly and openly, and don&#8217;t pressure your kids to be anything other than who they are.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-11-20.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:28:36","filesize":"26.19M","filesize_raw":"27463403","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2850,2833,2855],"tags":[6357,6358,2999,2209],"podcast_series":[8249],"cwp_profile":[3052],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-304770","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-character-development","category-godly-legacy","category-teens","tag-barbara-rainey","tag-dennis-rainey","tag-familylife","tag-parenting","podcast_series-25-years-of-radio-dennis-and-barbara-rainey","cwp_profile-barbara-rainey","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/304770\/parenting-rainey-style","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/304770\/parenting-rainey-style","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"5QU1umWPsT\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/parenting-rainey-style\/\">Parenting, Rainey Style<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/parenting-rainey-style\/embed\/#?secret=5QU1umWPsT\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Parenting, Rainey Style&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"5QU1umWPsT\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-11-20.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-11-20.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>From time to time, on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, you\u2019ve heard some real-life illustrations about marriage and family from Dennis and Barbara Rainey as they\u2019ve raised their children\u2014like this time when they got their kids involved in the illustration.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Rebecca really was in the midst of peer pressure. She was so surrounded that, on more than one occasion, she would come to us in tears. She would compare herself to\u2014what Rebecca? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> It\u2019s so cheesy <em>now<\/em>\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It is cheesy, but\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> \u2014but it fit <em>perfectly<\/em>!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It did, and it was so <em>real<\/em> at the time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday, November 20<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. We\u2019ll hear some flashbacks today and hear from some of Dennis and Barbara Rainey\u2019s children about what it was like growing up, Rainey. Stay with us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Monday edition. So, we have come through the celebration of our 25<sup>th<\/sup> anniversary of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And we\u2019ve decided to rename the broadcast <em>Gunsmoke<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> [Laughter] <em>Gunsmoke<\/em>?!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s right. There\u2019s getting ready to be a shootout at\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> No; no; no; no; no.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014you\u2019re ambushing me, here, on the broadcast today.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> No; here\u2019s what it is\u2014it\u2019s not <em>Gunsmoke<\/em>\u2014it is: <em>This Is Your Life<\/em>\u2014<em>that\u2019s<\/em> what it\u2019s going to be. You remember that old show, where they used to bring out folks and they\u2014we have been through the archive, and we\u2019ve got some\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Am I that ancient? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014we\u2019ve got some clips for you that we think are going to make\u2014this week, you know, when it\u2019s the Thanksgiving celebration\u2014this is a week when we ought to focus on family and things we\u2019re thankful for. I\u2019m going to play some things\u2014you have no idea what\u2019s coming up; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I don\u2019t.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I\u2019m just going to play some of these clips, and this will take you back a bit. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, the first clip we\u2019re going to listen to goes all the way back to, I think\u2014was this \u02b993? I\u2019m looking at our\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u20141993.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014I think that\u2019s right. This was 1993. Let\u2019s listen together and just see if you recognize this voice.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous interview] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ashley:<\/strong> I like what Dad does for us\u2014all his kids. I don\u2019t remember when he started doing it\u2014I guess it was when I was young, because I remember going out with Dad. He takes us all on dates. He takes us on dates by ourselves. I just remember that, even from when I was little. Dad would tell me about one time we went to see a Disney movie or something like that; and we went and got chocolate afterwards, or ice cream, or something. We\u2019re driving home\u2014I don\u2019t remember saying this\u2014but he asked me: \u201cWhat was my favorite part about the evening?\u201d I don\u2019t\u2014do you remember how old I was? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I think you were three \/ three-and-a-half years old.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ashley:<\/strong> He asked me what my favorite part of the evening was. I just looked up at him and I said, \u201cJust being with you.\u201d At three-and-a-half, that\u2019s really what I liked doing\u2014was just being with my dad and doing something with him. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat was the most special part of my evening. And still, to this day, he still takes us out; and we don\u2019t let him forget\u2014we go: \u201cIt\u2019s my turn. You owe me a date soon.\u201d He goes: \u201cYes; you\u2019re right. We need to do that.\u201d [Laughter] It\u2019s so fun! I love it!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well that\u2019s the picture, Bob\u2014is a parent pursuing a relationship with their child\u2014especially, during the turbulence of the teenage years. I think sometimes we think the work is over\u2014it\u2019s not done! There\u2019s a <em>lot<\/em> that can be done then\u2014and a lot of love that can be really, I think, can be built into their hearts over some time, maybe, we missed with our kids.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And that, of course, was our daughter, Ashley, who was commencing on her senior year in high school and\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> How old is she today?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> She\u2019s 43. I wish Bob\u2014[Laughter]\u2014I wish we had a live video cam in her kitchen right now, because I know what it would look like\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014unless she was having company to come over\u2014[Laughter]\u2014with seven boys and a foster care infant, in a swing, probably swinging back and forth or being held by one of the boys. There\u2019s a <em>lot<\/em> of life in her family. I\u2019m just really proud of her and Michael and how they have hammered out God\u2019s mission for their lives, their marriage, and their family. They\u2019re leaving a wonderful legacy as they have their oldest, who is a senior in high school right now, as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> One of the things that you sought to do with this program, through the years, was to be authentic\/transparent\u2014to bring us into the interior of what goes on in your home\u2014your marriage \/ your family. And at the same time, allow a little privacy for your children so that they didn\u2019t feel like they were growing up in the spotlight. For the most part, I think they felt protected from that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I think they did, maybe until the end. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur broadcast started, of course, in \u02b992. Ashley left home to go away to college not long after that. But one of the advantages to living in a very small community, like we do\u2014and our kids went to public school\u2014is that really no one at that school really cared if we had a broadcast or not.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It was an opportunity, I think, to allow them to lead a normal life and not feel like they were in a fishbowl, with people looking in, expecting us to have \u201cthe perfect family with perfect kids.\u201d It doesn\u2019t exist on this side of heaven. The perfect Father\u2014our heavenly Father\u2014had two kids, and they weren\u2019t perfect.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> So, we thoroughly enjoyed the process. I\u2019m glad we\u2019ve had a chance, over the past 25 years, just to give people a glimpse at what a family that is attempting to follow Jesus Christ looks like\u2014and how they fail, and get up, and fail again, and get up\u2014and teach, through their failures, to their kids.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, we had a father and son join us one day on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>\u2014friends of yours for many years, Ron Jenson and his son, Matt. In the middle of that program, we decided to call your son, Benjamin.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matt:<\/strong> Ben, and [me], and my dad, and Mr. Rainey\u2014all the way back \/ probably about ten years ago\u2014went on a little fishing trip. [Laughter] I think Ben remembers this. We took the Rainey van, and we listened to some tapes on preparing for adolescence and on sexuality itself.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ron:<\/strong> Oh, yes; I remember this one.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ben:<\/strong> It was the sex tapes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ron:<\/strong> The sex tapes; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It was dark in the car.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ron:<\/strong> It was quiet; it was quiet.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And it was quiet; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ron:<\/strong> These boys were rolling their eyes, going: \u201cHere we go with our dads. [Laughter] This is the talk.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> But you remember that; don\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matt:<\/strong> But I tell you something\u2014the thing about it \/ the thing about it, first of all, this is a subject that men do not want to talk about with their kids. This is something that our fathers did pro-actively\/intentionally, because they didn\u2019t want to leave the subject uncovered.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe thing I will never forget is both of our dads turning to us, at the end of the trip. I don\u2019t remember most of the rest of the trip; but they turned to us and they said: \u201cI have never cheated on your mother. I want you to know that,\u201d and the consistency that they showed in doing that \/ the integrity that they showed in doing that, and the fact that they actually talked about something.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I think the important thing to note here is that neither Ron [nor] I had the courage to do it by ourselves\u2014[Laughter]\u2014you know, seriously. I think sometimes people have listened to us, on the broadcast, Bob, and they hear where I am today in the process, which is now going through six kids through this process. You gain courage, and you gain momentum, and you hear kind of the conclusion of convictions.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut back then, I remember Ron and I getting together, as a couple of dads, going: \u201cHey, what are you talking to your son about?\u201d And he goes, \u201cI haven\u2019t talked to him,\u201d \u201cWell, you think we ought to?\u201d \u201cWell, man, I don\u2019t want to,\u201d \u201cMaybe we ought to anyway,\u201d We had this conversation and decided to go on this fishing trip together, get these tapes by\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ron:<\/strong> Then, we used tapes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; we did\u2014we used Dr. Dobson\u2019s tapes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ron:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You better believe it\u2014we plugged those things in. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt did get quiet in the car. We gave each other courage to enter into this discussion with our sons. As the process flows out, that\u2019s how those convictions are imparted to the next generation.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We didn\u2019t get to hear a lot of Ben during that clip, but you remember that trip like it was yesterday; don\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I do. We went camping, and it was awfully dark in that car. I think I turned the light down on the speedometer so it\u2014it was like, here were these grown men, with their sons, wanting them to hear the truth; but it is like: \u201cMan! I\u2019m glad we can look up to the horizon, where the lights are shining out on the roadway.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Of course, it\u2019s funny; because a lot of parents have taken their kids on trips in cars\u2014now, listening to you and Barbara\u2014[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Of course.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014do the same thing with the <em>Passport2Purity<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> material. This is something that you have felt was critical for parents to take the initiative on.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; as many of our listeners know, Barbara and I taught a class for 11 years to over 550 11- and 12-year-old\u2019s\u2014Sunday school class. In it, we just talked to them straight about life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think today, more than ever, it is moms and dads who need to have the privilege of talking about life\u2019s most intimate issues that really need to happen within the context of a bumbling, stumbling family that\u2019s attempting to follow Christ. I mean, it\u2019s okay if you don\u2019t say it perfectly. I mean, Ron\u2019s son and mine\u2014they don\u2019t remember what we said\u2014they just knew that we attempted to do it, and we did it. Then, at the end, we said, \u201cYes; we\u2019ve been faithful to your mom all these years.\u201d I\u2019m happy to say, after 45 years, that\u2019s still true of me. I think we could call Ron Jenson, and it\u2019d be the same answer for him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You will recognize this next clip; because this was a classic moment on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> with your daughter, Rebecca.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Rebecca really was in the midst of peer pressure. She was so surrounded that, on more than one occasion, she would come to us in tears. She would compare herself to\u2014what Rebecca?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> [Laughter] It is so cheesy <em>now<\/em>\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It is cheesy, but it\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> \u2014but it fit <em>perfectly!<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It did, and it was so <em>real<\/em> at the time. She was\u2014I mean, I <em>felt<\/em> her pain, Bob!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> Whatever! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This would have been when you were 15 or 16?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> About 14\/15\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> \u201414\/15.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014and 16\/17.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> Yes; I compared myself to a caged bird. [Bird sounds] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> A caged bird trapped \/ imprisoned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> And they had thrown the key away\u2014or whatever. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have a funny story. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of my friends, growing up, was\u2014we were \/ I was at her house\u2014I had spent the night. I was crying to her and telling her how <em>awful<\/em> it was: \u201cI\u2019m a caged bird,\u201d or \u201c\u2026a caged animal,\u201d or whatever. She was like: \u201cRebecca, you just need to tell your parents to just give you the key and just let you out. You just need to throw the key away.\u201d It was this dramatic thing, and it was so funny. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> It\u2019s so funny <em>now<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> It\u2019s funny <em>now<\/em>; at the time, I was so passionate about it. I was just like \u201cYes; I need to go to my parents,\u201d and you know\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And so, we heard that speech, Bob.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> The caged-bird speech.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Actually, it was a speech\u2014it was a dramatic monologue. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca: <\/strong>\u2014a monologue. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And it was <em>dramatic<\/em>\u2014I mean, bless Rebecca\u2019s heart. She would have these times she would come to\u2014and we\u2019re laughing, now; but it was not\u2014well truthfully, there were a couple of times that Rebecca was so dramatic in her tears and feeling like a caged bird that both Barbara and I could not allow one another to get eye contact; because if we would have looked\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> That\u2019s sad!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014it\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> I can\u2019t believe you guys! Thanks a lot!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, you need to understand\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca: <\/strong>\u2014but sympathize.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014after you heard that\u2014that\u2014that\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014the caged-bird monologue?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; it\u2019s like [Using a teenage-girl voice]: \u201cI just feel <em>trapped<\/em>. I\u2019m just\u2014all my friends are <em>free<\/em>.\u201d [Bird sounds]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We can thank our engineer, Keith, for the bird-sound effects. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> No doubt about it. All these years we\u2019ve told that story, I\u2019ve never ratted on which of Rebecca\u2019s peers it was that gave her that advice.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You\u2019re going to do it today?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I\u2019m going to do it today. [Laughter] She\u2019s now a mom, herself, of a brood of children\u2014Christy Payne Hutchins.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That\u2019s who it was?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> But hearing Rebecca describe it again, you were still laughing to hear the story; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Oh, yes; well, of course. The thing is Bob\u2014every parent has those moments\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u2014when they\u2019re acting just a fool. That\u2019s all there is to it\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014they\u2019re just being a fool, like a child\u2014and it is all you can do to keep from just bursting out laughing and doubling up.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, I\u2019ve got a clip you haven\u2019t heard. This has not been aired on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. In fact, this is something we just taped, recently, as a part of <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em> video series that we\u2019re putting together that\u2019s going to be available in the spring. We got your adult children together\u2014we asked them to reflect on what it was like, growing up in your home, and get their perspective on your parenting from where they are today. In fact, Rebecca starts this clip off. It\u2019s pretty self-explanatory.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Did the kids all know that they could be written out of the will? [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Listen to this.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[From <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em>]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> [Laughter] The favorite child?\u2014that would be Laura.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014who was the favorite child?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ashley:<\/strong> It was Laura; absolutely! Not was\u2014it is Laura.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Still?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ashley:<\/strong> Probably. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> She\u2019s the baby. So, the baby is always the favorite.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ashley:<\/strong> Well, I think it\u2019s because, as parents, we have our guinea pig, which is the first child\u2014that\u2019s what I am. Then, you learn all of the things you need to know and, so, you do better as you go down. But then, you also get older, so you get more tired\u2014I\u2019m realizing this, as a parent, now\u2014and you just kind of run out of steam. They get babied \/ they get special privileges. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve done a bunch of counseling over the years, and my husband and I have done some together. He says, actually, that Rebecca, the middle child, is the most well-adjusted; because she got all of the learning that Mom and Dad got from raising the couple of first ones as they started; but they\u2019re a little bit more relaxed with her, but they\u2019re not <em>totally<\/em> relaxed like they are with Laura.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> I think she probably knows it, but she probably wouldn\u2019t admit it\u2014that she\u2019s the favorite.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Growing up?\u2014me. I could go to my grave on this\u2014I really don\u2019t think there was a favorite. I truly just think Mom and Dad were just tired when it got to me. I mean, it\u2019s just honest. They worked really hard on the first three to get it right; and then, they were just like, \u201cYou know, we\u2019re exhausted!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well there you are. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I\u2019ll tell you what\u2014folks need to get <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em> if for no other reason than to see the expressions on our kids\u2019 faces as they go through kind of their feelings of Laura being the favorite.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> So, was she the favorite child?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, we were exhausted! [Laughter] And she stayed after all of them were gone. You know, when you have six there\u2014I mean, you got six chirping birds, with their mouths all wide open\u2014it moved from bird to bird over the years. So, when you\u2019re the caboose, there\u2019s some privileges; but there\u2019s also some costs. I think we were stricter with Laura than the other kids, because we had tested a few of our convictions out. It\u2019s kind of like, when you get to the last child, you\u2019ve kind of come to a conclusion about dating, and peer pressure, and certain matters, where you\u2019re not going to be fooled like you were with number one, number two, or number three.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> In our case, the favorite child kind of changed from day to day, depending on who was acting what way on any particular day; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; that\u2019s how I would answer the question. Again, when there\u2019s one child\u2014ends up being alone with her parents when there has been six competing\u2014I understand why they all thought that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> had not been on the air for very long when you celebrated your 50<sup>th<\/sup> birthday. We had a big party, here, at the office to celebrate; and your kids came from all over the country.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And everybody dressed in black\u2014had black balloons. They put me in a wheelchair and rolled me into the staff meeting.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> But there was one child, who was not able to come; and we captured that moment.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous Recording]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know, we did pretty good. We got Ashley and Michael over here from Memphis. We got Samuel down here from Fayetteville in a windy, rainy drive down the pig trail last night, arriving at our house at two in the morning. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut we couldn\u2019t arrange for a direct transcontinental flight from Tallinn to get Benjamin here. The best we could do was to get him here by telephone, and he should be on the line with us. Benjamin, are you there?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> I\u2019m here. [Cheering and applause]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> What time is it in Tallinn?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> It\u2019s 5:15.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Five fifteen\u2014you\u2019re ready for dinner; huh?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> Hardly. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, you know what today is; don\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> I heard the rumor.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; what have you been thinking about today as you\u2019ve reflected on your dad\u2019s 50<sup>th<\/sup>?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> Man, I\u2019ve been\u2014and I apologize for the start of the conversation\u2014I\u2019ve been crying for the past five minutes. Dad, I think I\u2019m looking at the same picture you guys are\u2014I guess it\u2019s still up\u2014it\u2019s you and me at the cross.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> As I reflected on that, there\u2019s one thing that stood out to me\u2014was that, Dad, no matter what we\u2019ve done in the 22 years of my life, the cross has been central to everything. You\u2019ve been a trail blazer by showing us the way\u2014by showing us that the cross was everything to you, and it should be everything to us. Not many of you know this, but that\u2019s why I\u2019m here. And this won\u2019t mean a whole lot to everybody else there; but when I left this summer, we just had a big going-away at the airport. And you know, I consider myself to be a pretty big guy \/ pretty strong. But you know, even as big as I am and as tough as I appear to be, that was a hard day to leave. [Emotion in voice] I wrote about it in my journal\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014I said: \u201cYesterday was really an amazing day, leaving Little Rock. Wow! You know, I never really thought I\u2019d be so scared\u2014so not wanting to leave\u2014but when I hugged Dad, it was as if the whole world could attack me and I\u2019d be safe.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDad, that\u2019s how it\u2019s been my whole life\u2014I mean, nothing mattered, at that point, to me when I was hugging you. I just want to thank you for being my dad and for showing me the way.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You\u2019ve heard that dozens of times. Still meaningful; isn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Oh, extremely. And what parent doesn\u2019t enjoy hearing that?\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014because you\u2019re well aware of where you\u2019ve been flawed in your character\u2014your failures\u2014what the\u2014\u201c\u2026should\u2019ve\u2026\u201d \u201c\u2026could\u2019ve\u2026\u201d \u201c\u2026would\u2019ves\u2026\u201d in a lifetime. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat a privilege that somebody\u2014maybe it was you, Bob\u2014that had somebody push the button to record that; because we\u2019ve now shared this, I\u2019m convinced, with millions of men around the world, just encouraging them to do what I attempted to do with my son. It wasn\u2019t perfect in how I did it\u2014to show him the way. His last words were\u2014are what kids are looking for today. They want us to show them the way\u2014it\u2019s the moral way, the spiritual way, the God way, the Scriptural way. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can just attest\u2014because both Barbara and I are aware of our failures\u2014you don\u2019t have to be perfect to show somebody else the way. In fact, my life verse\u2014I\u2019ve got it open, here, in my Bible\u2014is Psalm 112:1-2. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s got my granddaughter, Molly, who lived seven days\u2014[Emotion in voice]\u2014it\u2019s got her handprint on the verse. The verse says: \u201cPraise the Lord! Blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who greatly delights in His commandments. His offspring will be mighty in the land; the generation of the upright will be blessed.\u201d We called her Mighty Molly. We never know how long we\u2019ll have\u2014whether it will be seven days \/ seventy years\u2014we don\u2019t know. But God calls each of us to give account of our lives to Him and to show the next generation the way. That\u2019s really the message of today\u2019s broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Your wife Barbara and your daughter, Rebecca, were gracious to share with all of us\u2014bring us into the journey that you were on with the death of your granddaughter, Molly. Barbara and Rebecca wrote a book called <em>A Symphony in the Dark<\/em>. If our listeners are interested in finding out more about that chapter in your life, they can go to FamilyLifeToday.com. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think you\u2019re right, Dennis\u2014I think we have to remember, as parents, our job\u2014in the middle of adversity, in the middle of prosperity, for better \/ for worse\u2014our job is faithfulness\u2014to stand firm \/ to believe the gospel\u2014and to model that for our kids and help them see that the God we serve is a God who can be trusted, who we can depend on. They need to see that lived out in our lives. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd here, at FamilyLife, that\u2019s our goal\u2014is to help moms and dads \/ husbands and wives live in a marriage and a family, where God is at the center\u2014where your relationship with Him is not an add-on to your family\u2014but it\u2019s the hub around which everything revolves. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we\u2019re grateful for those of you, who have been regular listeners through the years\u2014and those of you who have stepped forward to help support this program\u2014helped us reach more people with practical biblical help and hope. I heard, recently, that it\u2019s about somewhere between six and seven percent of those who listen to a radio program, like <em>FamilyLi<\/em><em>fe Today,<\/em> who actually donate. What you do, when you make a donation, is\u2014you\u2019re making this program possible for other listeners around the world. They need your help, and you provide that when you support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn this Thanksgiving week, we\u2019re thankful for you. If God has used the ministry of FamilyLife in your life, we\u2019d love to have you join with us and help us reach more people. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can do that by going online at FamilyLifeToday.com. You can call 1-800-FL-TODAY to support this ministry; or you mail a donation to us at <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; and our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to continue to hear highlights from 25 years of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Tomorrow, the highlights feature Barbara Rainey. I hope you can tune in and be part of that program.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2017 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:28:36"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["26.19M"],"filesize_raw":["27463403"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-304770.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-304770.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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children in the limelight is diifficult. For Dennis and Barbara Rainey, the remedy was to live humbly and openly, and don't pressure your kids to be anything other than who they are.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-11-20.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>From time to time, on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, you\u2019ve heard some real-life illustrations about marriage and family from Dennis and Barbara Rainey as they\u2019ve raised their children\u2014like this time when they got their kids involved in the illustration.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Rebecca really was in the midst of peer pressure. She was so surrounded that, on more than one occasion, she would come to us in tears. She would compare herself to\u2014what Rebecca? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> It\u2019s so cheesy <em>now<\/em>\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It is cheesy, but\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> \u2014but it fit <em>perfectly<\/em>!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It did, and it was so <em>real<\/em> at the time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday, November 20<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. We\u2019ll hear some flashbacks today and hear from some of Dennis and Barbara Rainey\u2019s children about what it was like growing up, Rainey. Stay with us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Monday edition. So, we have come through the celebration of our 25<sup>th<\/sup> anniversary of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And we\u2019ve decided to rename the broadcast <em>Gunsmoke<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> [Laughter] <em>Gunsmoke<\/em>?!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s right. There\u2019s getting ready to be a shootout at\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> No; no; no; no; no.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014you\u2019re ambushing me, here, on the broadcast today.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> No; here\u2019s what it is\u2014it\u2019s not <em>Gunsmoke<\/em>\u2014it is: <em>This Is Your Life<\/em>\u2014<em>that\u2019s<\/em> what it\u2019s going to be. You remember that old show, where they used to bring out folks and they\u2014we have been through the archive, and we\u2019ve got some\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Am I that ancient? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014we\u2019ve got some clips for you that we think are going to make\u2014this week, you know, when it\u2019s the Thanksgiving celebration\u2014this is a week when we ought to focus on family and things we\u2019re thankful for. I\u2019m going to play some things\u2014you have no idea what\u2019s coming up; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I don\u2019t.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I\u2019m just going to play some of these clips, and this will take you back a bit. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, the first clip we\u2019re going to listen to goes all the way back to, I think\u2014was this \u02b993? I\u2019m looking at our\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u20141993.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014I think that\u2019s right. This was 1993. Let\u2019s listen together and just see if you recognize this voice.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous interview] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ashley:<\/strong> I like what Dad does for us\u2014all his kids. I don\u2019t remember when he started doing it\u2014I guess it was when I was young, because I remember going out with Dad. He takes us all on dates. He takes us on dates by ourselves. I just remember that, even from when I was little. Dad would tell me about one time we went to see a Disney movie or something like that; and we went and got chocolate afterwards, or ice cream, or something. We\u2019re driving home\u2014I don\u2019t remember saying this\u2014but he asked me: \u201cWhat was my favorite part about the evening?\u201d I don\u2019t\u2014do you remember how old I was? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I think you were three \/ three-and-a-half years old.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ashley:<\/strong> He asked me what my favorite part of the evening was. I just looked up at him and I said, \u201cJust being with you.\u201d At three-and-a-half, that\u2019s really what I liked doing\u2014was just being with my dad and doing something with him. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat was the most special part of my evening. And still, to this day, he still takes us out; and we don\u2019t let him forget\u2014we go: \u201cIt\u2019s my turn. You owe me a date soon.\u201d He goes: \u201cYes; you\u2019re right. We need to do that.\u201d [Laughter] It\u2019s so fun! I love it!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well that\u2019s the picture, Bob\u2014is a parent pursuing a relationship with their child\u2014especially, during the turbulence of the teenage years. I think sometimes we think the work is over\u2014it\u2019s not done! There\u2019s a <em>lot<\/em> that can be done then\u2014and a lot of love that can be really, I think, can be built into their hearts over some time, maybe, we missed with our kids.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And that, of course, was our daughter, Ashley, who was commencing on her senior year in high school and\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> How old is she today?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> She\u2019s 43. I wish Bob\u2014[Laughter]\u2014I wish we had a live video cam in her kitchen right now, because I know what it would look like\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014unless she was having company to come over\u2014[Laughter]\u2014with seven boys and a foster care infant, in a swing, probably swinging back and forth or being held by one of the boys. There\u2019s a <em>lot<\/em> of life in her family. I\u2019m just really proud of her and Michael and how they have hammered out God\u2019s mission for their lives, their marriage, and their family. They\u2019re leaving a wonderful legacy as they have their oldest, who is a senior in high school right now, as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> One of the things that you sought to do with this program, through the years, was to be authentic\/transparent\u2014to bring us into the interior of what goes on in your home\u2014your marriage \/ your family. And at the same time, allow a little privacy for your children so that they didn\u2019t feel like they were growing up in the spotlight. For the most part, I think they felt protected from that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I think they did, maybe until the end. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur broadcast started, of course, in \u02b992. Ashley left home to go away to college not long after that. But one of the advantages to living in a very small community, like we do\u2014and our kids went to public school\u2014is that really no one at that school really cared if we had a broadcast or not.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It was an opportunity, I think, to allow them to lead a normal life and not feel like they were in a fishbowl, with people looking in, expecting us to have \u201cthe perfect family with perfect kids.\u201d It doesn\u2019t exist on this side of heaven. The perfect Father\u2014our heavenly Father\u2014had two kids, and they weren\u2019t perfect.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> So, we thoroughly enjoyed the process. I\u2019m glad we\u2019ve had a chance, over the past 25 years, just to give people a glimpse at what a family that is attempting to follow Jesus Christ looks like\u2014and how they fail, and get up, and fail again, and get up\u2014and teach, through their failures, to their kids.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, we had a father and son join us one day on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>\u2014friends of yours for many years, Ron Jenson and his son, Matt. In the middle of that program, we decided to call your son, Benjamin.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matt:<\/strong> Ben, and [me], and my dad, and Mr. Rainey\u2014all the way back \/ probably about ten years ago\u2014went on a little fishing trip. [Laughter] I think Ben remembers this. We took the Rainey van, and we listened to some tapes on preparing for adolescence and on sexuality itself.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ron:<\/strong> Oh, yes; I remember this one.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ben:<\/strong> It was the sex tapes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ron:<\/strong> The sex tapes; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It was dark in the car.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ron:<\/strong> It was quiet; it was quiet.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And it was quiet; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ron:<\/strong> These boys were rolling their eyes, going: \u201cHere we go with our dads. [Laughter] This is the talk.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> But you remember that; don\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matt:<\/strong> But I tell you something\u2014the thing about it \/ the thing about it, first of all, this is a subject that men do not want to talk about with their kids. This is something that our fathers did pro-actively\/intentionally, because they didn\u2019t want to leave the subject uncovered.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe thing I will never forget is both of our dads turning to us, at the end of the trip. I don\u2019t remember most of the rest of the trip; but they turned to us and they said: \u201cI have never cheated on your mother. I want you to know that,\u201d and the consistency that they showed in doing that \/ the integrity that they showed in doing that, and the fact that they actually talked about something.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I think the important thing to note here is that neither Ron [nor] I had the courage to do it by ourselves\u2014[Laughter]\u2014you know, seriously. I think sometimes people have listened to us, on the broadcast, Bob, and they hear where I am today in the process, which is now going through six kids through this process. You gain courage, and you gain momentum, and you hear kind of the conclusion of convictions.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut back then, I remember Ron and I getting together, as a couple of dads, going: \u201cHey, what are you talking to your son about?\u201d And he goes, \u201cI haven\u2019t talked to him,\u201d \u201cWell, you think we ought to?\u201d \u201cWell, man, I don\u2019t want to,\u201d \u201cMaybe we ought to anyway,\u201d We had this conversation and decided to go on this fishing trip together, get these tapes by\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ron:<\/strong> Then, we used tapes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; we did\u2014we used Dr. Dobson\u2019s tapes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ron:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You better believe it\u2014we plugged those things in. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt did get quiet in the car. We gave each other courage to enter into this discussion with our sons. As the process flows out, that\u2019s how those convictions are imparted to the next generation.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We didn\u2019t get to hear a lot of Ben during that clip, but you remember that trip like it was yesterday; don\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I do. We went camping, and it was awfully dark in that car. I think I turned the light down on the speedometer so it\u2014it was like, here were these grown men, with their sons, wanting them to hear the truth; but it is like: \u201cMan! I\u2019m glad we can look up to the horizon, where the lights are shining out on the roadway.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Of course, it\u2019s funny; because a lot of parents have taken their kids on trips in cars\u2014now, listening to you and Barbara\u2014[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Of course.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014do the same thing with the <em>Passport2Purity<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> material. This is something that you have felt was critical for parents to take the initiative on.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; as many of our listeners know, Barbara and I taught a class for 11 years to over 550 11- and 12-year-old\u2019s\u2014Sunday school class. In it, we just talked to them straight about life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think today, more than ever, it is moms and dads who need to have the privilege of talking about life\u2019s most intimate issues that really need to happen within the context of a bumbling, stumbling family that\u2019s attempting to follow Christ. I mean, it\u2019s okay if you don\u2019t say it perfectly. I mean, Ron\u2019s son and mine\u2014they don\u2019t remember what we said\u2014they just knew that we attempted to do it, and we did it. Then, at the end, we said, \u201cYes; we\u2019ve been faithful to your mom all these years.\u201d I\u2019m happy to say, after 45 years, that\u2019s still true of me. I think we could call Ron Jenson, and it\u2019d be the same answer for him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You will recognize this next clip; because this was a classic moment on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> with your daughter, Rebecca.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Rebecca really was in the midst of peer pressure. She was so surrounded that, on more than one occasion, she would come to us in tears. She would compare herself to\u2014what Rebecca?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> [Laughter] It is so cheesy <em>now<\/em>\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It is cheesy, but it\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> \u2014but it fit <em>perfectly!<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It did, and it was so <em>real<\/em> at the time. She was\u2014I mean, I <em>felt<\/em> her pain, Bob!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> Whatever! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This would have been when you were 15 or 16?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> About 14\/15\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> \u201414\/15.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014and 16\/17.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> Yes; I compared myself to a caged bird. [Bird sounds] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> A caged bird trapped \/ imprisoned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> And they had thrown the key away\u2014or whatever. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have a funny story. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of my friends, growing up, was\u2014we were \/ I was at her house\u2014I had spent the night. I was crying to her and telling her how <em>awful<\/em> it was: \u201cI\u2019m a caged bird,\u201d or \u201c\u2026a caged animal,\u201d or whatever. She was like: \u201cRebecca, you just need to tell your parents to just give you the key and just let you out. You just need to throw the key away.\u201d It was this dramatic thing, and it was so funny. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> It\u2019s so funny <em>now<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> It\u2019s funny <em>now<\/em>; at the time, I was so passionate about it. I was just like \u201cYes; I need to go to my parents,\u201d and you know\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And so, we heard that speech, Bob.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> The caged-bird speech.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Actually, it was a speech\u2014it was a dramatic monologue. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca: <\/strong>\u2014a monologue. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And it was <em>dramatic<\/em>\u2014I mean, bless Rebecca\u2019s heart. She would have these times she would come to\u2014and we\u2019re laughing, now; but it was not\u2014well truthfully, there were a couple of times that Rebecca was so dramatic in her tears and feeling like a caged bird that both Barbara and I could not allow one another to get eye contact; because if we would have looked\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> That\u2019s sad!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014it\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> I can\u2019t believe you guys! Thanks a lot!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, you need to understand\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca: <\/strong>\u2014but sympathize.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014after you heard that\u2014that\u2014that\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014the caged-bird monologue?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; it\u2019s like [Using a teenage-girl voice]: \u201cI just feel <em>trapped<\/em>. I\u2019m just\u2014all my friends are <em>free<\/em>.\u201d [Bird sounds]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We can thank our engineer, Keith, for the bird-sound effects. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> No doubt about it. All these years we\u2019ve told that story, I\u2019ve never ratted on which of Rebecca\u2019s peers it was that gave her that advice.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You\u2019re going to do it today?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I\u2019m going to do it today. [Laughter] She\u2019s now a mom, herself, of a brood of children\u2014Christy Payne Hutchins.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That\u2019s who it was?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> But hearing Rebecca describe it again, you were still laughing to hear the story; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Oh, yes; well, of course. The thing is Bob\u2014every parent has those moments\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u2014when they\u2019re acting just a fool. That\u2019s all there is to it\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014they\u2019re just being a fool, like a child\u2014and it is all you can do to keep from just bursting out laughing and doubling up.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, I\u2019ve got a clip you haven\u2019t heard. This has not been aired on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. In fact, this is something we just taped, recently, as a part of <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em> video series that we\u2019re putting together that\u2019s going to be available in the spring. We got your adult children together\u2014we asked them to reflect on what it was like, growing up in your home, and get their perspective on your parenting from where they are today. In fact, Rebecca starts this clip off. It\u2019s pretty self-explanatory.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Did the kids all know that they could be written out of the will? [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Listen to this.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[From <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em>]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> [Laughter] The favorite child?\u2014that would be Laura.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014who was the favorite child?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ashley:<\/strong> It was Laura; absolutely! Not was\u2014it is Laura.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Still?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ashley:<\/strong> Probably. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> She\u2019s the baby. So, the baby is always the favorite.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ashley:<\/strong> Well, I think it\u2019s because, as parents, we have our guinea pig, which is the first child\u2014that\u2019s what I am. Then, you learn all of the things you need to know and, so, you do better as you go down. But then, you also get older, so you get more tired\u2014I\u2019m realizing this, as a parent, now\u2014and you just kind of run out of steam. They get babied \/ they get special privileges. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve done a bunch of counseling over the years, and my husband and I have done some together. He says, actually, that Rebecca, the middle child, is the most well-adjusted; because she got all of the learning that Mom and Dad got from raising the couple of first ones as they started; but they\u2019re a little bit more relaxed with her, but they\u2019re not <em>totally<\/em> relaxed like they are with Laura.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rebecca:<\/strong> I think she probably knows it, but she probably wouldn\u2019t admit it\u2014that she\u2019s the favorite.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Laura:<\/strong> Growing up?\u2014me. I could go to my grave on this\u2014I really don\u2019t think there was a favorite. I truly just think Mom and Dad were just tired when it got to me. I mean, it\u2019s just honest. They worked really hard on the first three to get it right; and then, they were just like, \u201cYou know, we\u2019re exhausted!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well there you are. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I\u2019ll tell you what\u2014folks need to get <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em> if for no other reason than to see the expressions on our kids\u2019 faces as they go through kind of their feelings of Laura being the favorite.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> So, was she the favorite child?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, we were exhausted! [Laughter] And she stayed after all of them were gone. You know, when you have six there\u2014I mean, you got six chirping birds, with their mouths all wide open\u2014it moved from bird to bird over the years. So, when you\u2019re the caboose, there\u2019s some privileges; but there\u2019s also some costs. I think we were stricter with Laura than the other kids, because we had tested a few of our convictions out. It\u2019s kind of like, when you get to the last child, you\u2019ve kind of come to a conclusion about dating, and peer pressure, and certain matters, where you\u2019re not going to be fooled like you were with number one, number two, or number three.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> In our case, the favorite child kind of changed from day to day, depending on who was acting what way on any particular day; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; that\u2019s how I would answer the question. Again, when there\u2019s one child\u2014ends up being alone with her parents when there has been six competing\u2014I understand why they all thought that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> had not been on the air for very long when you celebrated your 50<sup>th<\/sup> birthday. We had a big party, here, at the office to celebrate; and your kids came from all over the country.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And everybody dressed in black\u2014had black balloons. They put me in a wheelchair and rolled me into the staff meeting.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> But there was one child, who was not able to come; and we captured that moment.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous Recording]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know, we did pretty good. We got Ashley and Michael over here from Memphis. We got Samuel down here from Fayetteville in a windy, rainy drive down the pig trail last night, arriving at our house at two in the morning. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut we couldn\u2019t arrange for a direct transcontinental flight from Tallinn to get Benjamin here. The best we could do was to get him here by telephone, and he should be on the line with us. Benjamin, are you there?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> I\u2019m here. [Cheering and applause]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> What time is it in Tallinn?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> It\u2019s 5:15.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Five fifteen\u2014you\u2019re ready for dinner; huh?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> Hardly. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, you know what today is; don\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> I heard the rumor.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; what have you been thinking about today as you\u2019ve reflected on your dad\u2019s 50<sup>th<\/sup>?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> Man, I\u2019ve been\u2014and I apologize for the start of the conversation\u2014I\u2019ve been crying for the past five minutes. Dad, I think I\u2019m looking at the same picture you guys are\u2014I guess it\u2019s still up\u2014it\u2019s you and me at the cross.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Benjamin:<\/strong> As I reflected on that, there\u2019s one thing that stood out to me\u2014was that, Dad, no matter what we\u2019ve done in the 22 years of my life, the cross has been central to everything. You\u2019ve been a trail blazer by showing us the way\u2014by showing us that the cross was everything to you, and it should be everything to us. Not many of you know this, but that\u2019s why I\u2019m here. And this won\u2019t mean a whole lot to everybody else there; but when I left this summer, we just had a big going-away at the airport. And you know, I consider myself to be a pretty big guy \/ pretty strong. But you know, even as big as I am and as tough as I appear to be, that was a hard day to leave. [Emotion in voice] I wrote about it in my journal\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014I said: \u201cYesterday was really an amazing day, leaving Little Rock. Wow! You know, I never really thought I\u2019d be so scared\u2014so not wanting to leave\u2014but when I hugged Dad, it was as if the whole world could attack me and I\u2019d be safe.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDad, that\u2019s how it\u2019s been my whole life\u2014I mean, nothing mattered, at that point, to me when I was hugging you. I just want to thank you for being my dad and for showing me the way.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You\u2019ve heard that dozens of times. Still meaningful; isn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Oh, extremely. And what parent doesn\u2019t enjoy hearing that?\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014because you\u2019re well aware of where you\u2019ve been flawed in your character\u2014your failures\u2014what the\u2014\u201c\u2026should\u2019ve\u2026\u201d \u201c\u2026could\u2019ve\u2026\u201d \u201c\u2026would\u2019ves\u2026\u201d in a lifetime. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat a privilege that somebody\u2014maybe it was you, Bob\u2014that had somebody push the button to record that; because we\u2019ve now shared this, I\u2019m convinced, with millions of men around the world, just encouraging them to do what I attempted to do with my son. It wasn\u2019t perfect in how I did it\u2014to show him the way. His last words were\u2014are what kids are looking for today. They want us to show them the way\u2014it\u2019s the moral way, the spiritual way, the God way, the Scriptural way. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can just attest\u2014because both Barbara and I are aware of our failures\u2014you don\u2019t have to be perfect to show somebody else the way. In fact, my life verse\u2014I\u2019ve got it open, here, in my Bible\u2014is Psalm 112:1-2. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s got my granddaughter, Molly, who lived seven days\u2014[Emotion in voice]\u2014it\u2019s got her handprint on the verse. The verse says: \u201cPraise the Lord! Blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who greatly delights in His commandments. His offspring will be mighty in the land; the generation of the upright will be blessed.\u201d We called her Mighty Molly. We never know how long we\u2019ll have\u2014whether it will be seven days \/ seventy years\u2014we don\u2019t know. But God calls each of us to give account of our lives to Him and to show the next generation the way. That\u2019s really the message of today\u2019s broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Your wife Barbara and your daughter, Rebecca, were gracious to share with all of us\u2014bring us into the journey that you were on with the death of your granddaughter, Molly. Barbara and Rebecca wrote a book called <em>A Symphony in the Dark<\/em>. If our listeners are interested in finding out more about that chapter in your life, they can go to FamilyLifeToday.com. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think you\u2019re right, Dennis\u2014I think we have to remember, as parents, our job\u2014in the middle of adversity, in the middle of prosperity, for better \/ for worse\u2014our job is faithfulness\u2014to stand firm \/ to believe the gospel\u2014and to model that for our kids and help them see that the God we serve is a God who can be trusted, who we can depend on. They need to see that lived out in our lives. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd here, at FamilyLife, that\u2019s our goal\u2014is to help moms and dads \/ husbands and wives live in a marriage and a family, where God is at the center\u2014where your relationship with Him is not an add-on to your family\u2014but it\u2019s the hub around which everything revolves. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we\u2019re grateful for those of you, who have been regular listeners through the years\u2014and those of you who have stepped forward to help support this program\u2014helped us reach more people with practical biblical help and hope. I heard, recently, that it\u2019s about somewhere between six and seven percent of those who listen to a radio program, like <em>FamilyLi<\/em><em>fe Today,<\/em> who actually donate. What you do, when you make a donation, is\u2014you\u2019re making this program possible for other listeners around the world. They need your help, and you provide that when you support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn this Thanksgiving week, we\u2019re thankful for you. If God has used the ministry of FamilyLife in your life, we\u2019d love to have you join with us and help us reach more people. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can do that by going online at FamilyLifeToday.com. You can call 1-800-FL-TODAY to support this ministry; or you mail a donation to us at <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; and our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to continue to hear highlights from 25 years of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Tomorrow, the highlights feature Barbara Rainey. I hope you can tune in and be part of that program.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2017 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/304770","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=304770"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=304770"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=304770"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=304770"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=304770"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=304770"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=304770"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}