{"id":304598,"date":"2017-07-19T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2017-07-19T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/how-do-you-find-a-mate\/"},"modified":"2017-07-19T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2017-07-19T15:00:00","slug":"how-do-you-find-a-mate","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/how-do-you-find-a-mate\/","title":{"rendered":"How Do You Find a Mate?"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Alistair Begg, senior pastor at Parkside Church in Cleveland, Ohio, instructs college students on the finer points of choosing a mate.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-07-19.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:24:53","filesize":"22.79M","filesize_raw":"23898369","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2817,2807],"tags":[6285,6284,6280,6281,6283,6282],"podcast_series":[7304],"cwp_profile":[3117],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-304598","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-choosing-a-spouse","category-engagements-and-weddings","tag-find-a-husband","tag-find-a-wife","tag-how-to-find-a-mate","tag-how-to-find-a-spouse","tag-how-to-find-the-love-of-your-life","tag-how-to-find-your-soulmate","podcast_series-finding-your-future-mate","cwp_profile-alistair-begg","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/304598\/how-do-you-find-a-mate","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/304598\/how-do-you-find-a-mate","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"CSdbZ8wnLH\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/how-do-you-find-a-mate\/\">How Do You Find a Mate?<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/how-do-you-find-a-mate\/embed\/#?secret=CSdbZ8wnLH\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;How Do You Find a Mate?&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"CSdbZ8wnLH\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-07-19.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-07-19.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Wait, wait, wait! I\u2019ve heard of that program. In fact I listen to it every day. I do!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe message we are going to hear from Alistair today is a message that he shared with the student body at Cedarville University. You can bet those young people were taking notes when he started talking about relationships that can lead to marriage because that is on the mind of some college kids today, isn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It really is and, as you listen to him, you are going to enjoy his Southern accent\u2014he is from South Scotland. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Let's listen together. Here is Alistair Begg.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Message]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Alistair:<\/strong> Can I invite you to take your Bibles, and we'll turn to 1 Peter and chapter 3. I want to talk to you tonight about relationships and particularly interpersonal relationships between the sexes. Since they inevitably\u2014in God's plan\u2014lead to marriage, we'll read just these few verses in the instruction given by the Spirit of God\u2014via Peter\u2014to husbands and wives in 1 Peter 3.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\"Wives, in the same way, be submissive to your husbands so that if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and call him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHusbands, in the same way, be considerate as you live with your wives and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life so that nothing will hinder your prayers.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere is more than an even chance that whether you meet your intended life's partner in this institution or not, it may well be that in the next two or three years of your life, you will\u2014in some context\u2014meet the person that will share your life with you\u2014providing that God has planned for you to be married. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSince the statistics on relationships and marriage are so horrendous\u2014not least of all within the framework of the Christian church\u2014it's important that we are constantly making reference to this in our own thinking\u2014planning accordingly\u2014so that we do our very, very best if God intends for us to be entrusted into the custody of another to come to that day and to that opportunity prepared and ready for the privileges and the responsibilities.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you think about relationships at all\u2014in every relationship\u2014our relationship with God must come first. Indeed, unless we have a meaningful, viable, increasing relationship with the Lord Jesus ourselves\u2014not being kept afloat by our family structure, but our own personal walk with God\u2014practicing the presence of the Lord Jesus, memorizing His word, being in it daily, sharing it regularly\u2014then we really should go no further than that in terms of developing relationships, because it is in direct relationship to our walk with Christ that everything else falls into line.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, that is particularly so when we think about relationships with the opposite sex. It is important that when we find ourselves in a context such as this\u2014where the opportunities for friendship are many and varied\u2014that we never assume that a friendship has to be more than a friendship when it begins. We should never assume that friendship is going to be more than friendship when it begins and\u2014by the same token\u2014we should recognize that the absence of a friendship with someone of the opposite sex does not determine our significance on our meaning in life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe need to recognize that there is no good thing that the Lord will withhold from those whose walk is blameless. If we are not involved in a dating relationship, if we do not have a special other person, there is no need for panic. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod makes everything beautiful in His time. To be unattached to someone of the opposite sex may actually be God's very best for you tonight\u2014and it may actually be God's very best for you for always.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut let us assume, since the Bible lays it out as the normal pattern of life that each of you who as yet is not married is planning on being married and, therefore, you are going to be faced with crucial decisions as you go forward. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou are going to have to decide where you are going to take advice, and whether you're going to listen to those who love you most and care for you the best of all. When we make friends with the opposite sex, it is important that we take into account the way in which others view those friendships.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI wouldn't go so far as to suggest to you tonight that I believe in arranged marriages\u2014but I think I'm quite close to the idea\u2014because it has always struck me as very strange that our children grow up entirely dependent upon us. They want to know whether they should attend this function or that function\u2014whether they should apply to this school or that school.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn the earlier days, whether these shoes are right with these trousers or whether this skirt looks good with these heels or whether my hair looks good here or over there or whether you like this color on me now or then, and you're just dying under the weight of all the decisions that you have to make in order to help you chart your course and then\u2014all of a sudden, out of the blue\u2014you show up at the front door on the arm of someone I don't even know called Rodney. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWho in the world is Rodney? And then, I see in your eyes this strange, glazed look as you look up at Rodney. The look in my eyes is not glazed at all\u2014it's piercing. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to know all about Rodney\u2014who his dad was, who his mum was, what size his shoes are, whether he washes his socks at night. I want to know everything about him because, as a father, I care for my girl\u2014ss\u2014and the same is true with our sons. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tListen\u2014most people on their dating relationships are on their best behavior. So, you have to very, very careful. You need to see this potential spouse in a variety of different situations.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor example, you need to see what he\u2019s like when he\u2019s late for an appointment because of congested traffic and you\u2019re driving in the car with him. You need to see what he or she is like when visiting a hospitalized loved one. You need to see what he is like in the way that he treats his mother and speaks to her and whether he looks into her eyes when she asks him a question.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou need to see the way in which she brushes her hair from her forehead when her father asks her a question across the dining room table. You need to see what she\u2019s like playing with children in the street, being around their parents, with their regular friends, participating in competitive sports, handling various stressful situations.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe tragedy that I face as a pastor is in finding couples coming to me to be married and they\u2019ve never seen each other in any of these situations.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey\u2019ve got a kind of \u2018hurry-up offense\u2019\u2014stirred by their emotions\u2014fueled by their glands. They\u2019re ready to be married. Very often, they haven\u2019t decided whether they\u2019re actually marrying a person\u2014or whether they are marrying a body. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWestern society is obsessed with externals\u2014facial features, figure, muscular composition, weight, hair style and so much more. Most magazines\u2014even \"Reader's Digest,\" is there now\u2014managed to have an article somehow or another related to our bodies even if it is only the health of our bodies\u2014this puts tremendous pressure on our culture. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYoung women quickly assuming that their significance is directly related to their shape and to their dress size. Young men frequently modeling themselves after professional athletes\u2014disappointed that their features are less than perfect. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tProducts offered from toothpaste to self-tanning products with the covert message that image matters more than character.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tImage doesn't matter more than character, therefore, it is vitally important that when you think these issues through that you're asking yourself the question\u2014is the attraction that I feel for this fellow\u2014is the attraction that I feel for this girl\u2014motivated primarily by physical instincts?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, I want to suggest for a moment that that is some marginal consideration but beauty is\u2014for all of us\u2014in the eye of the beholder. Oh, there may be shared perceptions, but we often have very clear understandings of what we regard as lovely.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo the more significant questions don't have to do with shape and size and structure\u2014but we need to be asking questions like, \"Do I enjoy having a conversation with her?\" \"Can this fellow carry on an intelligent conversation?\"\u00a0 [Laughter] \"Is this character a social misfit?\" \"Does he or she have a growing interest in spiritual things, or do I get the impression that they are simply saying that because they know that it is important to me?\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy young friends tonight\u2014listen\u2014these questions get to issues that are enduring. Age takes its toll on all of us. Physical beauty is passing. To invest in a person as simply a physical package is to set ourselves up for a dreadful fall, because the package will begin to sag and will begin to droop, over time. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe law of gravity is the law of gravity. There is only so much you can do to keep it all up where it needs to be\u2014[Laughter] \u2014and some of us never, ever had it up where it needs to be in the first place, and so we are\u2014of all men\u2014most miserable. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen I came to America for the first time in 1972, I came in search of a girl. I knew who the girl was. I wasn't trying to pick her out of the crowd, but I tracked her down to Michigan, to the shores of Western Michigan, found her there amongst a bunch of young American fellows who had muscles in places that I didn't have places. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey took great delight in teaching me how to water-ski. They could ski in their bare feet. They didn't need two skis\u2014one ski\u2014no skis\u2014they skied in their bare feet. They gave me these gigantic doors on which to stand, never telling me that if you don't get up the first time, you let the rope go. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey dragged me through the water like a dead dog, much to their hilarity\u2014\"We'll get rid of this Scottish whippersnapper\u2014139 pounds soaking wet\u2014ugly little creature that he is\u2014coming over here for our American girls.\"\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen they took me on dirt bikes\u2014that was a bad decision on my part. [Laughter] Some fellow's father had an agency or a dealership or something, and I arrived at a place that I don't know where it was to find all these bikes. The fellows got on the front, the girls got on the back, and off we were going through the Michigan dunes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo I did what they did\u2014I got on the front; the girl got on the back\u2014they all took off. I went about 100 yards and ditched it in the sand\u2014with the girl as well. I got back up. I can't bore you with the story\u2014\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI had dreadful hay fever\u2014the worst kind of hay fever\u2014it produced horrendous nosebleeds. I ditched the bike in the sand\u2014my nose began to bleed\u2014the hay fever began to go\u2014the blood began to congeal with the sand on my face\u2014I looked like a Mohican Indian somewhere. [Laughter] And they had given a helmet\u2014of all things\u2014and my hair was sticking out in bunches at the side. Boy, did I look good! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe final ignominy was that I had to ask the girl to drive the bike while I sat on the back. [Laughter] She rode the bike back around in the sand, and they were all there waiting for me\u2014the All-American Marines\u2014and here he comes, peering over the shoulder of his girl\u2014the Mohican with the hair sticking out of the back. What possible hope did I have? I was a no-hoper\u2014no chance. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow I have to go home across the Atlantic Ocean and leave this girl\u2014and the dirt bike and everything else\u2014behind. Sometimes when we ride in the car together now\u2014all these years later\u2014I look across at her, and I say, \"My, my, my, it certainly couldn't have been physical.\" [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI actually met her when she was 13. I decided pretty quickly that if ever this girl would grow up around her eyes\u2014and I got the chance\u2014I would marry her. I've never, ever wanted to marry anyone else. For me\u2014just 16\u2014I wrote letters to her for seven years\u2014four of those years across the Atlantic Ocean. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNever doubt the power of the pen. All those American water-skiers bowed to the Scotsman's pen. [Laughter, applause]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo girls\u2014your beauty shouldn't be that which comes from time spent in front of a mirror but rather time spent in front of the mirror of the Word of God. And men\u2014the biggest thing that you can bring to the possibilities of marriage is the character of integrity and a life of spiritual maturity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, that's part one of a message from Alistair Begg.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> The power of the Scottish\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014the Scotsman's pen. Barbara said the same about you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Oh, sure, she did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That pen from Ozark, Missouri.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Ozark, Missouri. Here is what I don't want our single listeners to miss\u2014because we have literally hundreds of thousands of single listeners\u2014and we have moms and dads who are raising the next generation of young men and women who are going to date. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe message is this\u2014character <em>does<\/em> matter. Why? Because life is full of choices\u2014marriage is full of choices\u2014family is a reflection of our choices\u2014and your choices are ultimately a reflection of your character and what you're basing your life on.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat Alistair has so beautifully exhorted us\u2014and illustrated for us\u2014is that if our lives are not built upon the foundation of God's Word, and we're not making our character upon that foundation, there is no way we're going to be qualified to get married.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I was talking to a young woman not long ago who was dating a guy and she said, \"You know, I think he may be a diamond in the rough,\" and I remember thinking to myself, \"He may be\u2014he might be a piece of cut glass, too.\u201d It\u2019s hard to tell sometimes when you don\u2019t have a microscope to look at. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think that is what Alistair is trying to say to us in this message. We need to take this assignment of considering a perspective marriage partner\u2014take it seriously. First, try to be the right kind of person and then\u2014make sure we are looking for the right kind of person.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe always recommend to folks who are thinking about getting married\u2014one of the best things you can do during the engagement phase\u2014is for the two of you to attend a <em>Weekend to Remember\u00ae <\/em>\u00a0marriage getaway and start your marriage with the right kind of Biblical foundation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHave an understanding of God\u2019s design for marriage\u2014what it\u2019s all about and how He intends for us to live together as husband and wife. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>We have <em>Weekend to Remember <\/em>getaways starting in September. Now is the right time to start thinking about the getaway you\u2019d like to attend. Go ahead and put those dates on your calendar so that weekend is blocked off so you can get a away together and attend a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>. By the way, it\u2019s good for married couples\u2014not just engaged couples. Married couples can use a good tune-up in their marriage relationship. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019d love to have you join us this fall at one of our <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaways. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com for more information about the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> or call 1-800-FL-TODAY, if you have any questions. Again the website is FamilyLifeToday.com or you can call 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in Family, \u201cL\u201d as in Life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d, to get more information about the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the things that is our goal here at FamilyLife is to help couples who\u2014maybe you grew up without a strong model of what marriage and family is supposed to look like\u2014we want to help you break what may be generational cycles of dysfunction and learn how to thrive in your marriage and pass on to your children a healthy legacy. We want them to be able to look back and say, \u201cI learned what a godly marriage and family, looks like from my mom and dad.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHere at FamilyLife we are committed to providing you with practical, Biblical, help and hope for your marriage and your family. We do that through this daily radio program, through the resources we have available online, the events that we host. Really\u2014all that we do here at FamilyLife is pointed in that singular direction to effectively develop Godly marriages and families, who change the world one home at a time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere\u2019s a group of people who have come along side and partnered with us in this ministry. It\u2019s the group that made today\u2019s edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> possible for all of you who are listening. It\u2019s our monthly Legacy partners, the team that provides the financial foundation not only for this radio program but for everything we do here at <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you are a regular listener and you\u2019ve not joined the Legacy Partner team, we don\u2019t want to do anything to take away the giving you are already doing to your local church\u2014that ought to be your first priority\u2014but if you were able to set aside some funds each month and help support this ministry you\u2019d be enabling us to reach more people every day with the Biblical blueprints for marriage and family. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can find out more about becoming a Legacy partner when you go online at <em>FamilyLifeToday.com<\/em>\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014or when you call 1-800-358-6329, that\u2019s 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in Family, \u201cL\u201d as in Life, and the word \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow tomorrow we are going to hear from Alistair Begg about one of the key qualities you should be looking for in a future mate\u2014it\u2019s the quality of humility. We\u2019ll hear why that is so important tomorrow. Hope you can tune in for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We'll see you back tomorrow for another edition of FamilyLife Today. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFamilyLife Today is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. A Cru ministry. Help for Today. Hope for Tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t_____________________________________________________________\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts for you. However, there is a cost to transcribe, create, and produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 2017 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>www.FamilyLife.com<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:24:53"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["22.79M"],"filesize_raw":["23898369"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-304598.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-304598.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f 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Begg, senior pastor at Parkside Church in Cleveland, Ohio, instructs college students on the finer points of choosing a mate.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-07-19.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Wait, wait, wait! I\u2019ve heard of that program. In fact I listen to it every day. I do!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe message we are going to hear from Alistair today is a message that he shared with the student body at Cedarville University. You can bet those young people were taking notes when he started talking about relationships that can lead to marriage because that is on the mind of some college kids today, isn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It really is and, as you listen to him, you are going to enjoy his Southern accent\u2014he is from South Scotland. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Let's listen together. Here is Alistair Begg.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Message]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Alistair:<\/strong> Can I invite you to take your Bibles, and we'll turn to 1 Peter and chapter 3. I want to talk to you tonight about relationships and particularly interpersonal relationships between the sexes. Since they inevitably\u2014in God's plan\u2014lead to marriage, we'll read just these few verses in the instruction given by the Spirit of God\u2014via Peter\u2014to husbands and wives in 1 Peter 3.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\"Wives, in the same way, be submissive to your husbands so that if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and call him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHusbands, in the same way, be considerate as you live with your wives and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life so that nothing will hinder your prayers.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere is more than an even chance that whether you meet your intended life's partner in this institution or not, it may well be that in the next two or three years of your life, you will\u2014in some context\u2014meet the person that will share your life with you\u2014providing that God has planned for you to be married. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSince the statistics on relationships and marriage are so horrendous\u2014not least of all within the framework of the Christian church\u2014it's important that we are constantly making reference to this in our own thinking\u2014planning accordingly\u2014so that we do our very, very best if God intends for us to be entrusted into the custody of another to come to that day and to that opportunity prepared and ready for the privileges and the responsibilities.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you think about relationships at all\u2014in every relationship\u2014our relationship with God must come first. Indeed, unless we have a meaningful, viable, increasing relationship with the Lord Jesus ourselves\u2014not being kept afloat by our family structure, but our own personal walk with God\u2014practicing the presence of the Lord Jesus, memorizing His word, being in it daily, sharing it regularly\u2014then we really should go no further than that in terms of developing relationships, because it is in direct relationship to our walk with Christ that everything else falls into line.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, that is particularly so when we think about relationships with the opposite sex. It is important that when we find ourselves in a context such as this\u2014where the opportunities for friendship are many and varied\u2014that we never assume that a friendship has to be more than a friendship when it begins. We should never assume that friendship is going to be more than friendship when it begins and\u2014by the same token\u2014we should recognize that the absence of a friendship with someone of the opposite sex does not determine our significance on our meaning in life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe need to recognize that there is no good thing that the Lord will withhold from those whose walk is blameless. If we are not involved in a dating relationship, if we do not have a special other person, there is no need for panic. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod makes everything beautiful in His time. To be unattached to someone of the opposite sex may actually be God's very best for you tonight\u2014and it may actually be God's very best for you for always.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut let us assume, since the Bible lays it out as the normal pattern of life that each of you who as yet is not married is planning on being married and, therefore, you are going to be faced with crucial decisions as you go forward. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou are going to have to decide where you are going to take advice, and whether you're going to listen to those who love you most and care for you the best of all. When we make friends with the opposite sex, it is important that we take into account the way in which others view those friendships.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI wouldn't go so far as to suggest to you tonight that I believe in arranged marriages\u2014but I think I'm quite close to the idea\u2014because it has always struck me as very strange that our children grow up entirely dependent upon us. They want to know whether they should attend this function or that function\u2014whether they should apply to this school or that school.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn the earlier days, whether these shoes are right with these trousers or whether this skirt looks good with these heels or whether my hair looks good here or over there or whether you like this color on me now or then, and you're just dying under the weight of all the decisions that you have to make in order to help you chart your course and then\u2014all of a sudden, out of the blue\u2014you show up at the front door on the arm of someone I don't even know called Rodney. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWho in the world is Rodney? And then, I see in your eyes this strange, glazed look as you look up at Rodney. The look in my eyes is not glazed at all\u2014it's piercing. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to know all about Rodney\u2014who his dad was, who his mum was, what size his shoes are, whether he washes his socks at night. I want to know everything about him because, as a father, I care for my girl\u2014ss\u2014and the same is true with our sons. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tListen\u2014most people on their dating relationships are on their best behavior. So, you have to very, very careful. You need to see this potential spouse in a variety of different situations.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor example, you need to see what he\u2019s like when he\u2019s late for an appointment because of congested traffic and you\u2019re driving in the car with him. You need to see what he or she is like when visiting a hospitalized loved one. You need to see what he is like in the way that he treats his mother and speaks to her and whether he looks into her eyes when she asks him a question.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou need to see the way in which she brushes her hair from her forehead when her father asks her a question across the dining room table. You need to see what she\u2019s like playing with children in the street, being around their parents, with their regular friends, participating in competitive sports, handling various stressful situations.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe tragedy that I face as a pastor is in finding couples coming to me to be married and they\u2019ve never seen each other in any of these situations.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey\u2019ve got a kind of \u2018hurry-up offense\u2019\u2014stirred by their emotions\u2014fueled by their glands. They\u2019re ready to be married. Very often, they haven\u2019t decided whether they\u2019re actually marrying a person\u2014or whether they are marrying a body. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWestern society is obsessed with externals\u2014facial features, figure, muscular composition, weight, hair style and so much more. Most magazines\u2014even \"Reader's Digest,\" is there now\u2014managed to have an article somehow or another related to our bodies even if it is only the health of our bodies\u2014this puts tremendous pressure on our culture. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYoung women quickly assuming that their significance is directly related to their shape and to their dress size. Young men frequently modeling themselves after professional athletes\u2014disappointed that their features are less than perfect. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tProducts offered from toothpaste to self-tanning products with the covert message that image matters more than character.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tImage doesn't matter more than character, therefore, it is vitally important that when you think these issues through that you're asking yourself the question\u2014is the attraction that I feel for this fellow\u2014is the attraction that I feel for this girl\u2014motivated primarily by physical instincts?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, I want to suggest for a moment that that is some marginal consideration but beauty is\u2014for all of us\u2014in the eye of the beholder. Oh, there may be shared perceptions, but we often have very clear understandings of what we regard as lovely.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo the more significant questions don't have to do with shape and size and structure\u2014but we need to be asking questions like, \"Do I enjoy having a conversation with her?\" \"Can this fellow carry on an intelligent conversation?\"\u00a0 [Laughter] \"Is this character a social misfit?\" \"Does he or she have a growing interest in spiritual things, or do I get the impression that they are simply saying that because they know that it is important to me?\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy young friends tonight\u2014listen\u2014these questions get to issues that are enduring. Age takes its toll on all of us. Physical beauty is passing. To invest in a person as simply a physical package is to set ourselves up for a dreadful fall, because the package will begin to sag and will begin to droop, over time. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe law of gravity is the law of gravity. There is only so much you can do to keep it all up where it needs to be\u2014[Laughter] \u2014and some of us never, ever had it up where it needs to be in the first place, and so we are\u2014of all men\u2014most miserable. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen I came to America for the first time in 1972, I came in search of a girl. I knew who the girl was. I wasn't trying to pick her out of the crowd, but I tracked her down to Michigan, to the shores of Western Michigan, found her there amongst a bunch of young American fellows who had muscles in places that I didn't have places. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey took great delight in teaching me how to water-ski. They could ski in their bare feet. They didn't need two skis\u2014one ski\u2014no skis\u2014they skied in their bare feet. They gave me these gigantic doors on which to stand, never telling me that if you don't get up the first time, you let the rope go. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey dragged me through the water like a dead dog, much to their hilarity\u2014\"We'll get rid of this Scottish whippersnapper\u2014139 pounds soaking wet\u2014ugly little creature that he is\u2014coming over here for our American girls.\"\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen they took me on dirt bikes\u2014that was a bad decision on my part. [Laughter] Some fellow's father had an agency or a dealership or something, and I arrived at a place that I don't know where it was to find all these bikes. The fellows got on the front, the girls got on the back, and off we were going through the Michigan dunes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo I did what they did\u2014I got on the front; the girl got on the back\u2014they all took off. I went about 100 yards and ditched it in the sand\u2014with the girl as well. I got back up. I can't bore you with the story\u2014\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI had dreadful hay fever\u2014the worst kind of hay fever\u2014it produced horrendous nosebleeds. I ditched the bike in the sand\u2014my nose began to bleed\u2014the hay fever began to go\u2014the blood began to congeal with the sand on my face\u2014I looked like a Mohican Indian somewhere. [Laughter] And they had given a helmet\u2014of all things\u2014and my hair was sticking out in bunches at the side. Boy, did I look good! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe final ignominy was that I had to ask the girl to drive the bike while I sat on the back. [Laughter] She rode the bike back around in the sand, and they were all there waiting for me\u2014the All-American Marines\u2014and here he comes, peering over the shoulder of his girl\u2014the Mohican with the hair sticking out of the back. What possible hope did I have? I was a no-hoper\u2014no chance. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow I have to go home across the Atlantic Ocean and leave this girl\u2014and the dirt bike and everything else\u2014behind. Sometimes when we ride in the car together now\u2014all these years later\u2014I look across at her, and I say, \"My, my, my, it certainly couldn't have been physical.\" [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI actually met her when she was 13. I decided pretty quickly that if ever this girl would grow up around her eyes\u2014and I got the chance\u2014I would marry her. I've never, ever wanted to marry anyone else. For me\u2014just 16\u2014I wrote letters to her for seven years\u2014four of those years across the Atlantic Ocean. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNever doubt the power of the pen. All those American water-skiers bowed to the Scotsman's pen. [Laughter, applause]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo girls\u2014your beauty shouldn't be that which comes from time spent in front of a mirror but rather time spent in front of the mirror of the Word of God. And men\u2014the biggest thing that you can bring to the possibilities of marriage is the character of integrity and a life of spiritual maturity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, that's part one of a message from Alistair Begg.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> The power of the Scottish\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014the Scotsman's pen. Barbara said the same about you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Oh, sure, she did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That pen from Ozark, Missouri.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Ozark, Missouri. Here is what I don't want our single listeners to miss\u2014because we have literally hundreds of thousands of single listeners\u2014and we have moms and dads who are raising the next generation of young men and women who are going to date. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe message is this\u2014character <em>does<\/em> matter. Why? Because life is full of choices\u2014marriage is full of choices\u2014family is a reflection of our choices\u2014and your choices are ultimately a reflection of your character and what you're basing your life on.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat Alistair has so beautifully exhorted us\u2014and illustrated for us\u2014is that if our lives are not built upon the foundation of God's Word, and we're not making our character upon that foundation, there is no way we're going to be qualified to get married.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I was talking to a young woman not long ago who was dating a guy and she said, \"You know, I think he may be a diamond in the rough,\" and I remember thinking to myself, \"He may be\u2014he might be a piece of cut glass, too.\u201d It\u2019s hard to tell sometimes when you don\u2019t have a microscope to look at. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think that is what Alistair is trying to say to us in this message. We need to take this assignment of considering a perspective marriage partner\u2014take it seriously. First, try to be the right kind of person and then\u2014make sure we are looking for the right kind of person.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe always recommend to folks who are thinking about getting married\u2014one of the best things you can do during the engagement phase\u2014is for the two of you to attend a <em>Weekend to Remember\u00ae <\/em>\u00a0marriage getaway and start your marriage with the right kind of Biblical foundation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHave an understanding of God\u2019s design for marriage\u2014what it\u2019s all about and how He intends for us to live together as husband and wife. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>We have <em>Weekend to Remember <\/em>getaways starting in September. Now is the right time to start thinking about the getaway you\u2019d like to attend. Go ahead and put those dates on your calendar so that weekend is blocked off so you can get a away together and attend a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>. By the way, it\u2019s good for married couples\u2014not just engaged couples. Married couples can use a good tune-up in their marriage relationship. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019d love to have you join us this fall at one of our <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaways. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com for more information about the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> or call 1-800-FL-TODAY, if you have any questions. Again the website is FamilyLifeToday.com or you can call 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in Family, \u201cL\u201d as in Life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d, to get more information about the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the things that is our goal here at FamilyLife is to help couples who\u2014maybe you grew up without a strong model of what marriage and family is supposed to look like\u2014we want to help you break what may be generational cycles of dysfunction and learn how to thrive in your marriage and pass on to your children a healthy legacy. We want them to be able to look back and say, \u201cI learned what a godly marriage and family, looks like from my mom and dad.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHere at FamilyLife we are committed to providing you with practical, Biblical, help and hope for your marriage and your family. We do that through this daily radio program, through the resources we have available online, the events that we host. Really\u2014all that we do here at FamilyLife is pointed in that singular direction to effectively develop Godly marriages and families, who change the world one home at a time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere\u2019s a group of people who have come along side and partnered with us in this ministry. It\u2019s the group that made today\u2019s edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> possible for all of you who are listening. It\u2019s our monthly Legacy partners, the team that provides the financial foundation not only for this radio program but for everything we do here at <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you are a regular listener and you\u2019ve not joined the Legacy Partner team, we don\u2019t want to do anything to take away the giving you are already doing to your local church\u2014that ought to be your first priority\u2014but if you were able to set aside some funds each month and help support this ministry you\u2019d be enabling us to reach more people every day with the Biblical blueprints for marriage and family. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can find out more about becoming a Legacy partner when you go online at <em>FamilyLifeToday.com<\/em>\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014or when you call 1-800-358-6329, that\u2019s 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in Family, \u201cL\u201d as in Life, and the word \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow tomorrow we are going to hear from Alistair Begg about one of the key qualities you should be looking for in a future mate\u2014it\u2019s the quality of humility. We\u2019ll hear why that is so important tomorrow. Hope you can tune in for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We'll see you back tomorrow for another edition of FamilyLife Today. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFamilyLife Today is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. A Cru ministry. Help for Today. Hope for Tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t_____________________________________________________________\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts for you. However, there is a cost to transcribe, create, and produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 2017 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>www.FamilyLife.com<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/304598","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=304598"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=304598"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=304598"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=304598"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=304598"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=304598"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=304598"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}