{"id":304544,"date":"2017-06-12T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2017-06-12T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/being-a-strong-effective-father\/"},"modified":"2017-06-12T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2017-06-12T15:00:00","slug":"being-a-strong-effective-father","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/being-a-strong-effective-father\/","title":{"rendered":"Being a Strong, Effective Father"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>guest: David Jeremiah, Meg Meeker, Robert Lewis, Voddie Baucham | Series: 25 Years of Radio: A Father&#8217;s Role | What kind of dad are you? Learn principles for being a strong, effective father from Voddie Baucham, Robert Lewis, David Jeremiah, and Dr. Meg Meeker.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What kind of dad are you? Learn principles for being a strong, effective father from Voddie Baucham, Robert Lewis, David Jeremiah, and Dr. Meg Meeker.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-06-12.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:24:54","filesize":"22.8M","filesize_raw":"23903048","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2837,2825],"tags":[6261,4277],"podcast_series":[8214],"cwp_profile":[3294,3187,3461,8805],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-304544","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-fathers","category-honoring-your-parents","tag-25-years-of-familylife-today","tag-fathers","podcast_series-25-years-of-radio-a-fathers-role","cwp_profile-david-jeremiah","cwp_profile-meg-meeker","cwp_profile-robert-lewis","cwp_profile-voddie-baucham","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/304544\/being-a-strong-effective-father","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/304544\/being-a-strong-effective-father","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"LzIPaidw5S\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/being-a-strong-effective-father\/\">Being a Strong, Effective Father<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/being-a-strong-effective-father\/embed\/#?secret=LzIPaidw5S\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Being a Strong, Effective Father&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"LzIPaidw5S\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-06-12.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-06-12.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Dr. Meg Meeker remembers a time when she was in college\u2014she realized that her dad had not stopped being her dad.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Meg:<\/strong> I got home very late, and my dad was waiting up. That gentleman dropped me off, and my dad ran out and just said to him that he was in no uncertain terms <em>not <\/em>allowed back near our home. Now, this was what my dad said to me: \u201cI know you\u2019re off at college doing whatever you want to do\u2014you\u2019re there \/ you\u2019re responsible. But when you come home, it\u2019s our rules; because it\u2019s <em>still<\/em> our home.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday, June 12<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. Kids don\u2019t always like it when a dad does what dads ought to do\u2014at least, not in the moment\u2014but years later, they see how much they benefit from dad being a dad. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. This is the time of year when we celebrate the impact dads have on the family. It does feel a little bit like Father\u2019s Day doesn\u2019t get quite the attention Mother\u2019s Day gets; don\u2019t you think?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, come on, Bob! How can I answer that question? [Laughter] I mean, there\u2019s nothing like a mom and a mom\u2019s love; but I have to say this\u2014the older I get, the more I appreciate my own dad\u2019s impact on my life and the importance of every man, who\u2019s listening to our voices today\u2014the impact for good or for not-so-good in the life of your children, the life of your wife \/ your partner in parenting, and then, your community. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI mean, dads really set\u2014they set a course. When they don\u2019t set a course, usually, the outcome is <em>not<\/em> a good outcome.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know, it does occur to me that one of the reasons Mother\u2019s Day probably gets more attention is because, in most families, kids spend a lot more time with mom\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> They do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014than they do with dad. That doesn\u2019t mean that the time they spend with dad is inconsequential or insignificant. In fact, it can be profound and powerful. One of the people we\u2019ve heard from over the years\u2014and today, we\u2019re going to be hearing from different folks, who have been guests on <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>\/ who have spoken at our events over the years\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> We\u2019re doing that because this is our 25<sup>th<\/sup> birthday of <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em> We just want to celebrate God\u2019s goodness for a quarter of a century and allow our listeners to kind of celebrate the silver with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; the birthday celebration comes up in November; but here, in advance, we thought we\u2019d just look back and hear some of the voices we\u2019ve heard over the years. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the people we\u2019ve had as a guest on <em>FamilyLife Today, <\/em>and a person who has spoken at a number of events we\u2019ve had, talking about how profound a father\u2019s role is, is Voddie Baucham. Voddie, today, gives leadership to a seminary in Africa. For a number of years, he was a pastor in Houston, Texas.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And, as our listeners have heard Voddie on the broadcast before\u2014he\u2019s a straight shooter.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> There\u2019s nothing unclear about what you\u2019re about to hear him say.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Message]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Voddie:<\/strong> George Whitfield: \u201cEvery governor of a family ought to look upon himself as obliged to act in three capacities: as a prophet to instruct; as a priest to pray for and with; and as king to govern, direct, and provide for them.\u201d What does a man need to know in order to function in this particular area? He needs to understand the gospel; he needs to understand evangelism; and he needs to understand discipleship.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat is the gospel? The gospel is the good news! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt is the <em>good<\/em> <em>news<\/em> of what <em>God<\/em> has done, through the person and work of Jesus Christ, to redeem lost and sinful men through His death, burial, and resurrection\u2014as a substitutionary, <em>vicarious<\/em> death\u2014that satisfies the righteous <em>wrath<\/em> of a holy God on behalf of sinners who can be saved and forgiven no other way. That\u2019s what the gospel is\u2014it\u2019s something we proclaim. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat does the gospel require? The gospel requires repentance and faith\u2014period! \u201cWhoa! You can\u2019t just live any way you want to live! There\u2019s got to be some obedience in there!\u201d Yes; that\u2019s what the gospel <em>produces<\/em>. If you confuse what the gospel produces and what the gospel requires, you end up in works-based righteousness; because now you\u2019re trying to accomplish, in and of yourself, that which <em>only God <\/em>accomplishes through the gospel.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou\u2019ve got to understand the fallen nature of man if you\u2019re going to do evangelism. You\u2019ve got to understand the fallen nature of your children. A man cannot do evangelism properly within the context and confines of his home if he doesn\u2019t know the fallen nature of his children. Otherwise, if he doesn\u2019t understand the fallen nature of his children, then he thinks that his children just need some good habits: \u201cIf I just get these good habits into my children, then they\u2019ll grow up and be good, godly kids; because they\u2019ll <em>do<\/em> the right thing.\u201d But, if you understand the fallen nature of your children, you understand that they don\u2019t just need good habits\u2014they need a new <em>nature<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet\u2019s go to the next part of this\u2014discipleship: \u201cChildren, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right,\u201d \u201cHonor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with a promise, that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land,\u201d \u201cFathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis, of course, is based on the mandate in Deuteronomy, Chapter 6. We have an obligation to disciple our children. There is <em>nothing<\/em> in the Scriptures\u2014there is <em>nothing<\/em> anywhere in the Scriptures\u2014that puts the responsibility of the discipleship of children on <em>any <\/em>person other than parents and grandparents\u2014<em>nowhere <\/em>else in the Bible! You\u2019ll never find youth pastors in the Bible discipling kids \/ children\u2019s ministers in the Bible discipling kids\u2014you\u2019re not going to find that. It\u2019s not there! It doesn\u2019t exist! It\u2019s <em>not<\/em> there! The obligation \/ the <em>command<\/em> is given to parents. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, again, that\u2019s Voddie Baucham laying a pretty heavy spiritual foundation. I mean, when it comes right down to it, there\u2019s a lot that a father is responsible for; but this is at the base of all of it; don\u2019t you think?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I do. If you go to Deuteronomy 6, it makes it clear that, when a dad gets up in the morning, he is to feel the <em>weight<\/em> of this spiritual responsibility for directing his children \/ for equipping his children in knowing how to do life\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014for skillfully training his children to know how to relate to the opposite sex \/ how to relate to each other, as siblings. This is a man\u2019s responsibility\u2014it\u2019s not just the mom\u2019s responsibility. A dad\u2019s got to be in there, training, equipping, coaching, encouraging, and putting his arm around a child when he sees one of them fail\u2014letting him know there\u2019s grace for our failures and giving him wisdom to know how to handle his failures and not quit \/ not give up. A <em>dad<\/em> is really important to children not losing heart in well-doing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Some dads hear this, and they think to themselves: \u201cI can\u2019t do this! I mean, I\u2019m not equipped to be a spiritual leader to my family! I just don\u2019t have the tools.\u201d What would you say to them?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Open the book of Proverbs. It\u2019s very clear\u2014it talks about a dad talking to his son \/ it\u2019s about a dad instructing his daughter. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDads need to be in the game. You\u2019re not going to do it perfectly, but do it! Don\u2019t be silent \/ don\u2019t be passive\u2014being a dad is not\u2014it is not a passive game. It\u2019s an engagement with children, with imperfect human beings, who are like you. That\u2019s one of the problems! [Laughter] You see yourself coming out in them, and then you have to deal with it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, my children taught me a lot about myself. A part of parenting, I think\u2014of being a dad\u2014is growing up yourself. It means you\u2019ve got to lay aside childish things and <em>embrace<\/em> being an adult \/ <em>embrace<\/em> being a man and the assignment from God\u2014it\u2019s only <em>your <\/em>assignment. Nobody else can be the father to your children that you are.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> One of the people that we\u2019ve heard from over the years on this subject is Dr. Robert Lewis, who wrote a great book called <em>Raising a Modern-Day Knight<\/em>. In that book, he said dads have got to decide what kind of dad they\u2019re going to be.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Robert:<\/strong> There are three types of fatherhood that I see as I listen to men talk to me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe first is the absent father\u2014the father who was not involved and not around \/ he was not emotionally connected to his kids. Those young men grow up with what I call a deep absent-father wound that they still try to work out for the rest of their lives. They\u2019re trying to connect with some older man or someplace where they can find a sense of their identity, because dad wasn\u2019t there. That\u2019s the first.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe second is what I mentioned a moment ago\u2014the hang loose father. This is the dad who is involved; but his involvement is by his presence, not by a sense of direction or clarity. He\u2019ll attend a game; he\u2019ll take his kid to church; they\u2019ll attend events together; they have certain traditions together\u2014it\u2019s <em>good<\/em> in the sense that the presence of the dad is there\u2014but in this call, back to men getting involved in their families, I think a lot of men are moving back to a sense of <em>presence<\/em> but not a strategic presence.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Robert:<\/strong> Not long ago, when I taught a class on morally-empowered teens, I asked dads in that class\u2014I said: \u201cHow many of you are involved with your kids?\u201d\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014a lot of dads raised their hands. \u201cHow many of you go to their ball games?\u201d\u2014a lot of dads raised their hands. Then I said, \u201cHow many of you dads have taught your son what it means to be a man?\u201d Dennis, I want you to know\u2014there was absolute silence. Then I said, \u201cHow many of you dads have taught your sons what their responsibilities \/ specific responsibilities, as a man, in marriage are to be?\u201d\u2014no hands. \u201cHow many of you have taught your son how to interact honorably with a woman?\u201d\u2014no hands.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSee, it was the lack of hands that told me that what we have is a movement back to involved fatherhood\u2014<em>presence<\/em>, which is good\u2014it\u2019s better than absence.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Dad\u2019s there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Robert:<\/strong> That\u2019s right, and that\u2019s <em>good<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s a beginning point.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Robert:<\/strong> That is, and it\u2019s going to create some memories and emotional connection; but without the other, sons are still drifting. Let me tell you\u2014a son, who is drifting, tends to drift in the wrong directions. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what brings me to the third kind of fatherhood; and that is, <em>strategic<\/em> fatherhood, in which the dad\u2014not only involves himself, <em>emotionally<\/em>, in his son\u2019s life\u2014but gives strategic points of direction in order to allow his son to grow through phases and feel a sense of affirmation, or \u201cknighting,\u201d if you will, into this concept called authentic masculinity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That is Dr. Robert Lewis talking about three types of dads. And that\u2019s a good kind of benchmark for all of us\u2014to say: \u201cAm I an absent dad?\u201d \u201cAm I a hang loose dad?\u201d or \u201cAm I being intentional and strategic, as a dad?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And that first one that he talked about\u2014an absent dad \/ disengaged\u2014that man needs an identity, as a father. He needs a spiritual address. He needs to know he\u2019s got a divine assignment, by Almighty God, given to him to be the daddy and to instruct. Even as imperfect as you may be, your children need you in the game, instructing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSecondly, the hang loose dad\u2014I think the hang loose dad needs urgency. He needs somebody to build a fire under his posterior and say: \u201cIt\u2019s time to get in the game. Let\u2019s go!\u201d Your children are growing up. If you have a 9-year-old, half of your instructive years with him are nearly over. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> If you\u2019ve got a 16-year-old, you\u2019ve got two years left\u2014really, two summers. You\u2019re not going to have that much time! Teenagers are rockin\u2019 and rollin\u2019 with cars and wheels\u2014and they\u2019re gone \/ they\u2019re doing all of their activity. Dad, you\u2019ve got to be there!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd then, third, the strategic dad needs a plan. Bob, that\u2019s what we\u2019re working on, here, at FamilyLife. You\u2019ve been working on it for the past seven or eight months. We want to design a video-assisted training curriculum for mothers and fathers to give them a plan that, together as a couple \/ together as moms and dads, they can implement with their children. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe problem is\u2014it\u2019s not available today. [Laughter] It\u2019s going to be a few months before it\u2019s going to be available.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> It\u2019s a complement to a book that you and Barbara are writing on the subject of parenting\u2014and it will be a few months\u2014but I think you\u2019re right. I think, as parents, we need to have a plan and a strategy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tRobert was talking about fathers and sons, but it\u2019s true for fathers and daughters. We had our friend, Dr. Meg Meeker, as a guest on <em>FamilyLife Today. <\/em>She\u2019s a pediatrician and an author, and she talked about how powerful her father was in her life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Meg:<\/strong> I had gone out on a date with a fellow that my dad didn\u2019t know very well; but what he did know, he didn\u2019t like. [Laughter] Now, my dad didn\u2019t have to <em>say<\/em> that\u2014I could see it in his face\u2014that he didn\u2019t like it. So the gentleman came over and picked me up. I had gone to an all-women\u2019s college. You know, I wasn\u2019t dating a whole lot; and my dad just kind of knew something smelled kind of funny. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI got home very late, and my dad was waiting up. That gentleman dropped me off, and my dad ran out and just said to him that he was in no uncertain terms <em>not <\/em>allowed back near our home. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Because he brought you home late?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Meg:<\/strong> Because he brought me home late, and\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Now, weren\u2019t you a college student?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Meg:<\/strong> Yes; I was a college student, but <em>here\u2019s<\/em> what my parents said\u2014and we do this with our college students\u2014that is: \u201cThis is our home. Now, I know\u201d\u2014and we say this to our kids \/ this was what my dad said to me\u2014\u201cI know you\u2019re off at college doing whatever you want to do. You\u2019re there \/ you\u2019re responsible. But when you come home, it\u2019s our rules; because it\u2019s <em>still<\/em> our home. So, you don\u2019t go out and <em>float<\/em> until 3 in the morning just because you may at college. You don\u2019t do that when you\u2019re at our home.\u201d That\u2019s what my dad let me know\u2014that, still, when I came into the home, I was back under his wing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI will tell you\u2014I learned about the gentleman who took me out that night\u2014that, sure enough, he really was a bad egg; and I couldn\u2019t see it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut my dad could <em>sense<\/em> it, early on, when he first met the guy. He really, literally, ran him out of the house\u2014that was that. I was humiliated, and I was <em>furious<\/em> with my dad and felt like I wanted to run away from home. I was 20 years old; but still, I realized my dad was much smarter than I was at that time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, again, that\u2019s Dr. Meg Meeker.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I love that story!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> It\u2019s a story dads need to hear; because, in the moment, we don\u2019t want to do that. Dads don\u2019t want to rush out and get their daughter all mad at them; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, did you hear the number of times she mentioned how much pain it causes to be a parent? Well, of course, it does! Parenting is a responsibility, and it\u2019s also a great privilege. But to do it right, you\u2019re going to have to go against the flow. You\u2019re not training\u2014you\u2019re not training a thoroughbred who knows how to run the race yet; you\u2019re training wild horses in some ways.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> They\u2019re learning how to run the race. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou\u2019ve got to equip them while you have the time, because there will be a day when you will have to let them go with the lessons you\u2019ve given them. The question is: \u201cWill you have trained them to do life God\u2019s way?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And, as you said, we\u2019re not going to do it perfectly; but if we are faithful, we are planting seeds in our children\u2019s lives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Those seeds will bear a good harvest as long as we\u2019re faithful.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And I\u2019ll tell you one of the great privileges I\u2019ve had in being a dad over\u2014well, we were parents for 28\/29 years\u2014one of them was interviewing my daughters\u2019 dates. I mean, I\u2019m telling you\u2014what a great privilege. You heard Dr. Meeker tell her story. She didn\u2019t appreciate it at the time; but you know, as parents, we\u2019re not running a popularity contest here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You\u2019re trying to protect them against evil, and you\u2019re trying to train them and let them know that you care. You love them! My daughters didn\u2019t appreciate all of the interviews I did, but they do <em>now<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> They sure do <em>now<\/em>, because they\u2019ve got some good men they\u2019re married to.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, the point is\u2014as a dad, you\u2019ve got to engage in the game \/ you\u2019ve got to be there! You\u2019ve got to press through the pain and attempt to be God\u2019s man with this young lady \/ this young man you\u2019re raising so you can help them grow up and become mature.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And if you\u2019re faithful\u2014. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014there\u2019s a payoff! There\u2019s a big-time payoff.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> In fact, that\u2019s what David Jeremiah reminded us of when he was a guest on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> When we ask our kids\u2014and we\u2019re hanging out at one of the holidays or something\u2014we get into one of these remembrance modes: \u201cYou know, what is the greatest thing you remember about growing up in our family?\u201d As a pastor, I guess, maybe in the back of my mind, I wish it would be, \u201cYou know, Dad, it was the day you opened the Scriptures and you gave us these truths from the Word of God.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> But that\u2019s not it. They\u2019ll talk about the crazy things that we have done. I hate to camp, but I succumbed one time to going camping. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe waited until a board meeting was over, and we went to this place\u2014this campground\u2014and set up our tent. We couldn\u2019t see really well. The next morning, when we woke up, we were all in a ball, kind of down at the bottom of the tent. We had set the tent up on a slope; and during the night, we had all slid down to the bottom of the tent, where there was just kind of in this heap at the bottom. [Laughter] We had to untangle ourselves from each other.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, when we talk about, \u201cWhat do you remember about growing up in the Jeremiah household?\u201d\u2014it\u2019s that kind of stuff\u2014and the night I took my son to repay all of the people who had been TP\u2019ing our house for about three weeks; you know? [Laughter] I drove the getaway car. [Laughter] I mean, they won\u2019t ever forget those kinds of things. If I could go back and do it over again, that\u2019s one of the things I would do more of. We\u2019ve had <em>a lot<\/em> of fun\u2014I think our kids sense our love for them when we get involved in their lives and enjoy them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Now, even though they don\u2019t bring up you opening the Scriptures, you still did that with them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Absolutely!\u2014right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, I think the greatest things that happened in our family weren\u2019t the formal times so much as it was\u2014for instance, when I was driving back across the country with Daniel, and we had a chance to talk about spiritual things. You know, the Book of Deuteronomy says we\u2019re to do this as we go in and out, as we interact in the norm of life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> That\u2019s where the <em>real<\/em>\u2014I think the real, meaningful things happen, when we can take the things that are happening in life and relate the Scriptures to them to our children.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That was Dr. David Jeremiah. You know what he\u2019s talking about, Bob\u2014at least, what I called it when the kids were small\u2014is \u201csandbox theology.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It\u2019s training your kids in how to live life according to God\u2019s way when they\u2019re little\u2014meet them on their turf. Sometimes, that means you\u2019ve got to get in the sandbox, and you\u2019ve got to go to the dances\u2014you\u2019ve got to be a chaperone, and you\u2019ve got to go to the party. You\u2019ve got to be where they are\u2014at the ballgames\u2014and you\u2019ve got to pay attention to who they\u2019re messing around with and who they\u2019re hanging out with. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou\u2019ve got to speak the truth to them\u2014not always giving sermons or sermonettes\u2014but hang in there, put your arm around them, and guide them in the way they should go.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s your assignment.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Along the way, you can take them out for ice cream, or go camping, or do some fun stuff.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014or TP some houses! I couldn\u2019t help but laugh as he talked about that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of my favorite memories was having\u2014I don\u2019t know how many\u2014girls in the back of my pick up. Now, you\u2019d have to know where we live\u2014it\u2019s not even a street that\u2019s a thoroughfare\u2014it\u2019s in the country \/ it\u2019s a back road\u2014there\u2019s no traffic. At about 11:00\/11:30 at night, I had\u2014I don\u2019t know\u2014a dozen giggling 14- and 15-year-old girls in the back of my pick up. It was like we were trying to sneak up on one of their friend\u2019s houses. It was like a circus coming into the neighborhood at midnight. I mean, their friend busted them\u2014I mean, they all broke out of the woods when they heard them coming down the road. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThose are great memories to have. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI used to have a 3x5 card on a lampshade by my telephone at the office: \u201cAt the end of the day, make sure you have been found guilty of having too much fun rather than too little.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know, the foundation for all of this\u2014before you can become the dad that God has called you to be \/ before you can become the husband that God\u2019s called you to be, you have to be the man God\u2019s called you to be \/ you have to be the person that God has called you to become. That\u2019s at the heart of the book that you\u2019ve written for men called <em>Stepping Up: A Call to Courageous Manhood. <\/em>I know many of our listeners have, not only read that book\u2014a lot of our listeners have gotten that book and passed it on to sons or to fathers. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, I was thinking about this\u2014in honor of Father\u2019s Day, rather than the father getting the gifts, maybe the dad ought to buy some books to pass out to his sons\u2014you know, he could be the gift-giver. We\u2019ve got copies of the <em>Stepping Up <\/em>book available in our <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>Resource Center, along with other resources for dads. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou\u2019ve written a book on interviewing your daughters\u2019 dates; a book for dads of sons called <em>Aggressive Girls, Clueless Boys<\/em>; and we\u2019ve got the <em>Stepping Up<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup>video series that\u2019s a great tool for a dad to take his sons through if they\u2019re high school-, or college-aged, or older\u2014great series for fathers and sons to go through together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAll of these resources are available to be ordered from us, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY to order. Again, our website is FamilyLifeToday.com. You can call 1-800-358-6329 to order\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur goal, here, at FamilyLife is to help dads and moms \/ husbands and wives to be the men and women that God has called them to be <em>first<\/em> and then to live that out in their marriage and in their family. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe want to effectively develop godly marriages and families. We want to see every home a godly home. This radio program is all about that goal\u2014the same goes for our website, the resources we\u2019re creating \/ the events that we\u2019re hosting. It all has that same aim in mind. When you become a partner with us, here, at FamilyLife, what you\u2019re doing is helping us expand and accelerate our mission. You\u2019re helping us reach more people all over the world. So, \u201cThank you,\u201d to our Legacy Partners \/ \u201cThank you,\u201d to those of you who will, from time to time, stop to make a donation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019re a regular listener to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, and you\u2019re not yet a part of the team that is helping to advance this mission, we\u2019d love to have you join us. You can donate online at FamilyLifeToday.com; you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY; or you can mail your donation to us at <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; the zip code is 72223. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019ve benefitted from this ministry in any way, help others benefit, as well, by becoming a part of the team that makes <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> possible in your community and all around the world.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we hope you can be back with us again tomorrow when we\u2019re going to hear some more great thoughts from some great thinkers about being a dad. I hope you can tune in for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2017 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:24:54"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["22.8M"],"filesize_raw":["23903048"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-304544.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-304544.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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kind of dad are you? Learn principles for being a strong, effective father from Voddie Baucham, Robert Lewis, David Jeremiah, and Dr. Meg Meeker.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-06-12.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Dr. Meg Meeker remembers a time when she was in college\u2014she realized that her dad had not stopped being her dad.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Meg:<\/strong> I got home very late, and my dad was waiting up. That gentleman dropped me off, and my dad ran out and just said to him that he was in no uncertain terms <em>not <\/em>allowed back near our home. Now, this was what my dad said to me: \u201cI know you\u2019re off at college doing whatever you want to do\u2014you\u2019re there \/ you\u2019re responsible. But when you come home, it\u2019s our rules; because it\u2019s <em>still<\/em> our home.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday, June 12<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. Kids don\u2019t always like it when a dad does what dads ought to do\u2014at least, not in the moment\u2014but years later, they see how much they benefit from dad being a dad. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. This is the time of year when we celebrate the impact dads have on the family. It does feel a little bit like Father\u2019s Day doesn\u2019t get quite the attention Mother\u2019s Day gets; don\u2019t you think?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, come on, Bob! How can I answer that question? [Laughter] I mean, there\u2019s nothing like a mom and a mom\u2019s love; but I have to say this\u2014the older I get, the more I appreciate my own dad\u2019s impact on my life and the importance of every man, who\u2019s listening to our voices today\u2014the impact for good or for not-so-good in the life of your children, the life of your wife \/ your partner in parenting, and then, your community. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI mean, dads really set\u2014they set a course. When they don\u2019t set a course, usually, the outcome is <em>not<\/em> a good outcome.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know, it does occur to me that one of the reasons Mother\u2019s Day probably gets more attention is because, in most families, kids spend a lot more time with mom\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> They do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014than they do with dad. That doesn\u2019t mean that the time they spend with dad is inconsequential or insignificant. In fact, it can be profound and powerful. One of the people we\u2019ve heard from over the years\u2014and today, we\u2019re going to be hearing from different folks, who have been guests on <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>\/ who have spoken at our events over the years\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> We\u2019re doing that because this is our 25<sup>th<\/sup> birthday of <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em> We just want to celebrate God\u2019s goodness for a quarter of a century and allow our listeners to kind of celebrate the silver with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; the birthday celebration comes up in November; but here, in advance, we thought we\u2019d just look back and hear some of the voices we\u2019ve heard over the years. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the people we\u2019ve had as a guest on <em>FamilyLife Today, <\/em>and a person who has spoken at a number of events we\u2019ve had, talking about how profound a father\u2019s role is, is Voddie Baucham. Voddie, today, gives leadership to a seminary in Africa. For a number of years, he was a pastor in Houston, Texas.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And, as our listeners have heard Voddie on the broadcast before\u2014he\u2019s a straight shooter.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> There\u2019s nothing unclear about what you\u2019re about to hear him say.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Message]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Voddie:<\/strong> George Whitfield: \u201cEvery governor of a family ought to look upon himself as obliged to act in three capacities: as a prophet to instruct; as a priest to pray for and with; and as king to govern, direct, and provide for them.\u201d What does a man need to know in order to function in this particular area? He needs to understand the gospel; he needs to understand evangelism; and he needs to understand discipleship.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat is the gospel? The gospel is the good news! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt is the <em>good<\/em> <em>news<\/em> of what <em>God<\/em> has done, through the person and work of Jesus Christ, to redeem lost and sinful men through His death, burial, and resurrection\u2014as a substitutionary, <em>vicarious<\/em> death\u2014that satisfies the righteous <em>wrath<\/em> of a holy God on behalf of sinners who can be saved and forgiven no other way. That\u2019s what the gospel is\u2014it\u2019s something we proclaim. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat does the gospel require? The gospel requires repentance and faith\u2014period! \u201cWhoa! You can\u2019t just live any way you want to live! There\u2019s got to be some obedience in there!\u201d Yes; that\u2019s what the gospel <em>produces<\/em>. If you confuse what the gospel produces and what the gospel requires, you end up in works-based righteousness; because now you\u2019re trying to accomplish, in and of yourself, that which <em>only God <\/em>accomplishes through the gospel.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou\u2019ve got to understand the fallen nature of man if you\u2019re going to do evangelism. You\u2019ve got to understand the fallen nature of your children. A man cannot do evangelism properly within the context and confines of his home if he doesn\u2019t know the fallen nature of his children. Otherwise, if he doesn\u2019t understand the fallen nature of his children, then he thinks that his children just need some good habits: \u201cIf I just get these good habits into my children, then they\u2019ll grow up and be good, godly kids; because they\u2019ll <em>do<\/em> the right thing.\u201d But, if you understand the fallen nature of your children, you understand that they don\u2019t just need good habits\u2014they need a new <em>nature<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet\u2019s go to the next part of this\u2014discipleship: \u201cChildren, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right,\u201d \u201cHonor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with a promise, that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land,\u201d \u201cFathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis, of course, is based on the mandate in Deuteronomy, Chapter 6. We have an obligation to disciple our children. There is <em>nothing<\/em> in the Scriptures\u2014there is <em>nothing<\/em> anywhere in the Scriptures\u2014that puts the responsibility of the discipleship of children on <em>any <\/em>person other than parents and grandparents\u2014<em>nowhere <\/em>else in the Bible! You\u2019ll never find youth pastors in the Bible discipling kids \/ children\u2019s ministers in the Bible discipling kids\u2014you\u2019re not going to find that. It\u2019s not there! It doesn\u2019t exist! It\u2019s <em>not<\/em> there! The obligation \/ the <em>command<\/em> is given to parents. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, again, that\u2019s Voddie Baucham laying a pretty heavy spiritual foundation. I mean, when it comes right down to it, there\u2019s a lot that a father is responsible for; but this is at the base of all of it; don\u2019t you think?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I do. If you go to Deuteronomy 6, it makes it clear that, when a dad gets up in the morning, he is to feel the <em>weight<\/em> of this spiritual responsibility for directing his children \/ for equipping his children in knowing how to do life\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014for skillfully training his children to know how to relate to the opposite sex \/ how to relate to each other, as siblings. This is a man\u2019s responsibility\u2014it\u2019s not just the mom\u2019s responsibility. A dad\u2019s got to be in there, training, equipping, coaching, encouraging, and putting his arm around a child when he sees one of them fail\u2014letting him know there\u2019s grace for our failures and giving him wisdom to know how to handle his failures and not quit \/ not give up. A <em>dad<\/em> is really important to children not losing heart in well-doing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Some dads hear this, and they think to themselves: \u201cI can\u2019t do this! I mean, I\u2019m not equipped to be a spiritual leader to my family! I just don\u2019t have the tools.\u201d What would you say to them?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Open the book of Proverbs. It\u2019s very clear\u2014it talks about a dad talking to his son \/ it\u2019s about a dad instructing his daughter. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDads need to be in the game. You\u2019re not going to do it perfectly, but do it! Don\u2019t be silent \/ don\u2019t be passive\u2014being a dad is not\u2014it is not a passive game. It\u2019s an engagement with children, with imperfect human beings, who are like you. That\u2019s one of the problems! [Laughter] You see yourself coming out in them, and then you have to deal with it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, my children taught me a lot about myself. A part of parenting, I think\u2014of being a dad\u2014is growing up yourself. It means you\u2019ve got to lay aside childish things and <em>embrace<\/em> being an adult \/ <em>embrace<\/em> being a man and the assignment from God\u2014it\u2019s only <em>your <\/em>assignment. Nobody else can be the father to your children that you are.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> One of the people that we\u2019ve heard from over the years on this subject is Dr. Robert Lewis, who wrote a great book called <em>Raising a Modern-Day Knight<\/em>. In that book, he said dads have got to decide what kind of dad they\u2019re going to be.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Robert:<\/strong> There are three types of fatherhood that I see as I listen to men talk to me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe first is the absent father\u2014the father who was not involved and not around \/ he was not emotionally connected to his kids. Those young men grow up with what I call a deep absent-father wound that they still try to work out for the rest of their lives. They\u2019re trying to connect with some older man or someplace where they can find a sense of their identity, because dad wasn\u2019t there. That\u2019s the first.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe second is what I mentioned a moment ago\u2014the hang loose father. This is the dad who is involved; but his involvement is by his presence, not by a sense of direction or clarity. He\u2019ll attend a game; he\u2019ll take his kid to church; they\u2019ll attend events together; they have certain traditions together\u2014it\u2019s <em>good<\/em> in the sense that the presence of the dad is there\u2014but in this call, back to men getting involved in their families, I think a lot of men are moving back to a sense of <em>presence<\/em> but not a strategic presence.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Robert:<\/strong> Not long ago, when I taught a class on morally-empowered teens, I asked dads in that class\u2014I said: \u201cHow many of you are involved with your kids?\u201d\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014a lot of dads raised their hands. \u201cHow many of you go to their ball games?\u201d\u2014a lot of dads raised their hands. Then I said, \u201cHow many of you dads have taught your son what it means to be a man?\u201d Dennis, I want you to know\u2014there was absolute silence. Then I said, \u201cHow many of you dads have taught your sons what their responsibilities \/ specific responsibilities, as a man, in marriage are to be?\u201d\u2014no hands. \u201cHow many of you have taught your son how to interact honorably with a woman?\u201d\u2014no hands.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSee, it was the lack of hands that told me that what we have is a movement back to involved fatherhood\u2014<em>presence<\/em>, which is good\u2014it\u2019s better than absence.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Dad\u2019s there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Robert:<\/strong> That\u2019s right, and that\u2019s <em>good<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s a beginning point.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Robert:<\/strong> That is, and it\u2019s going to create some memories and emotional connection; but without the other, sons are still drifting. Let me tell you\u2014a son, who is drifting, tends to drift in the wrong directions. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what brings me to the third kind of fatherhood; and that is, <em>strategic<\/em> fatherhood, in which the dad\u2014not only involves himself, <em>emotionally<\/em>, in his son\u2019s life\u2014but gives strategic points of direction in order to allow his son to grow through phases and feel a sense of affirmation, or \u201cknighting,\u201d if you will, into this concept called authentic masculinity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That is Dr. Robert Lewis talking about three types of dads. And that\u2019s a good kind of benchmark for all of us\u2014to say: \u201cAm I an absent dad?\u201d \u201cAm I a hang loose dad?\u201d or \u201cAm I being intentional and strategic, as a dad?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And that first one that he talked about\u2014an absent dad \/ disengaged\u2014that man needs an identity, as a father. He needs a spiritual address. He needs to know he\u2019s got a divine assignment, by Almighty God, given to him to be the daddy and to instruct. Even as imperfect as you may be, your children need you in the game, instructing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSecondly, the hang loose dad\u2014I think the hang loose dad needs urgency. He needs somebody to build a fire under his posterior and say: \u201cIt\u2019s time to get in the game. Let\u2019s go!\u201d Your children are growing up. If you have a 9-year-old, half of your instructive years with him are nearly over. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> If you\u2019ve got a 16-year-old, you\u2019ve got two years left\u2014really, two summers. You\u2019re not going to have that much time! Teenagers are rockin\u2019 and rollin\u2019 with cars and wheels\u2014and they\u2019re gone \/ they\u2019re doing all of their activity. Dad, you\u2019ve got to be there!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd then, third, the strategic dad needs a plan. Bob, that\u2019s what we\u2019re working on, here, at FamilyLife. You\u2019ve been working on it for the past seven or eight months. We want to design a video-assisted training curriculum for mothers and fathers to give them a plan that, together as a couple \/ together as moms and dads, they can implement with their children. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe problem is\u2014it\u2019s not available today. [Laughter] It\u2019s going to be a few months before it\u2019s going to be available.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> It\u2019s a complement to a book that you and Barbara are writing on the subject of parenting\u2014and it will be a few months\u2014but I think you\u2019re right. I think, as parents, we need to have a plan and a strategy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tRobert was talking about fathers and sons, but it\u2019s true for fathers and daughters. We had our friend, Dr. Meg Meeker, as a guest on <em>FamilyLife Today. <\/em>She\u2019s a pediatrician and an author, and she talked about how powerful her father was in her life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Meg:<\/strong> I had gone out on a date with a fellow that my dad didn\u2019t know very well; but what he did know, he didn\u2019t like. [Laughter] Now, my dad didn\u2019t have to <em>say<\/em> that\u2014I could see it in his face\u2014that he didn\u2019t like it. So the gentleman came over and picked me up. I had gone to an all-women\u2019s college. You know, I wasn\u2019t dating a whole lot; and my dad just kind of knew something smelled kind of funny. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI got home very late, and my dad was waiting up. That gentleman dropped me off, and my dad ran out and just said to him that he was in no uncertain terms <em>not <\/em>allowed back near our home. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Because he brought you home late?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Meg:<\/strong> Because he brought me home late, and\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Now, weren\u2019t you a college student?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Meg:<\/strong> Yes; I was a college student, but <em>here\u2019s<\/em> what my parents said\u2014and we do this with our college students\u2014that is: \u201cThis is our home. Now, I know\u201d\u2014and we say this to our kids \/ this was what my dad said to me\u2014\u201cI know you\u2019re off at college doing whatever you want to do. You\u2019re there \/ you\u2019re responsible. But when you come home, it\u2019s our rules; because it\u2019s <em>still<\/em> our home. So, you don\u2019t go out and <em>float<\/em> until 3 in the morning just because you may at college. You don\u2019t do that when you\u2019re at our home.\u201d That\u2019s what my dad let me know\u2014that, still, when I came into the home, I was back under his wing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI will tell you\u2014I learned about the gentleman who took me out that night\u2014that, sure enough, he really was a bad egg; and I couldn\u2019t see it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut my dad could <em>sense<\/em> it, early on, when he first met the guy. He really, literally, ran him out of the house\u2014that was that. I was humiliated, and I was <em>furious<\/em> with my dad and felt like I wanted to run away from home. I was 20 years old; but still, I realized my dad was much smarter than I was at that time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, again, that\u2019s Dr. Meg Meeker.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I love that story!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> It\u2019s a story dads need to hear; because, in the moment, we don\u2019t want to do that. Dads don\u2019t want to rush out and get their daughter all mad at them; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, did you hear the number of times she mentioned how much pain it causes to be a parent? Well, of course, it does! Parenting is a responsibility, and it\u2019s also a great privilege. But to do it right, you\u2019re going to have to go against the flow. You\u2019re not training\u2014you\u2019re not training a thoroughbred who knows how to run the race yet; you\u2019re training wild horses in some ways.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> They\u2019re learning how to run the race. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou\u2019ve got to equip them while you have the time, because there will be a day when you will have to let them go with the lessons you\u2019ve given them. The question is: \u201cWill you have trained them to do life God\u2019s way?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And, as you said, we\u2019re not going to do it perfectly; but if we are faithful, we are planting seeds in our children\u2019s lives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Those seeds will bear a good harvest as long as we\u2019re faithful.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And I\u2019ll tell you one of the great privileges I\u2019ve had in being a dad over\u2014well, we were parents for 28\/29 years\u2014one of them was interviewing my daughters\u2019 dates. I mean, I\u2019m telling you\u2014what a great privilege. You heard Dr. Meeker tell her story. She didn\u2019t appreciate it at the time; but you know, as parents, we\u2019re not running a popularity contest here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You\u2019re trying to protect them against evil, and you\u2019re trying to train them and let them know that you care. You love them! My daughters didn\u2019t appreciate all of the interviews I did, but they do <em>now<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> They sure do <em>now<\/em>, because they\u2019ve got some good men they\u2019re married to.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, the point is\u2014as a dad, you\u2019ve got to engage in the game \/ you\u2019ve got to be there! You\u2019ve got to press through the pain and attempt to be God\u2019s man with this young lady \/ this young man you\u2019re raising so you can help them grow up and become mature.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And if you\u2019re faithful\u2014. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014there\u2019s a payoff! There\u2019s a big-time payoff.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> In fact, that\u2019s what David Jeremiah reminded us of when he was a guest on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Previous Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> When we ask our kids\u2014and we\u2019re hanging out at one of the holidays or something\u2014we get into one of these remembrance modes: \u201cYou know, what is the greatest thing you remember about growing up in our family?\u201d As a pastor, I guess, maybe in the back of my mind, I wish it would be, \u201cYou know, Dad, it was the day you opened the Scriptures and you gave us these truths from the Word of God.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> But that\u2019s not it. They\u2019ll talk about the crazy things that we have done. I hate to camp, but I succumbed one time to going camping. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe waited until a board meeting was over, and we went to this place\u2014this campground\u2014and set up our tent. We couldn\u2019t see really well. The next morning, when we woke up, we were all in a ball, kind of down at the bottom of the tent. We had set the tent up on a slope; and during the night, we had all slid down to the bottom of the tent, where there was just kind of in this heap at the bottom. [Laughter] We had to untangle ourselves from each other.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, when we talk about, \u201cWhat do you remember about growing up in the Jeremiah household?\u201d\u2014it\u2019s that kind of stuff\u2014and the night I took my son to repay all of the people who had been TP\u2019ing our house for about three weeks; you know? [Laughter] I drove the getaway car. [Laughter] I mean, they won\u2019t ever forget those kinds of things. If I could go back and do it over again, that\u2019s one of the things I would do more of. We\u2019ve had <em>a lot<\/em> of fun\u2014I think our kids sense our love for them when we get involved in their lives and enjoy them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Now, even though they don\u2019t bring up you opening the Scriptures, you still did that with them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Absolutely!\u2014right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, I think the greatest things that happened in our family weren\u2019t the formal times so much as it was\u2014for instance, when I was driving back across the country with Daniel, and we had a chance to talk about spiritual things. You know, the Book of Deuteronomy says we\u2019re to do this as we go in and out, as we interact in the norm of life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> That\u2019s where the <em>real<\/em>\u2014I think the real, meaningful things happen, when we can take the things that are happening in life and relate the Scriptures to them to our children.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That was Dr. David Jeremiah. You know what he\u2019s talking about, Bob\u2014at least, what I called it when the kids were small\u2014is \u201csandbox theology.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It\u2019s training your kids in how to live life according to God\u2019s way when they\u2019re little\u2014meet them on their turf. Sometimes, that means you\u2019ve got to get in the sandbox, and you\u2019ve got to go to the dances\u2014you\u2019ve got to be a chaperone, and you\u2019ve got to go to the party. You\u2019ve got to be where they are\u2014at the ballgames\u2014and you\u2019ve got to pay attention to who they\u2019re messing around with and who they\u2019re hanging out with. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou\u2019ve got to speak the truth to them\u2014not always giving sermons or sermonettes\u2014but hang in there, put your arm around them, and guide them in the way they should go.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s your assignment.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Along the way, you can take them out for ice cream, or go camping, or do some fun stuff.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014or TP some houses! I couldn\u2019t help but laugh as he talked about that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of my favorite memories was having\u2014I don\u2019t know how many\u2014girls in the back of my pick up. Now, you\u2019d have to know where we live\u2014it\u2019s not even a street that\u2019s a thoroughfare\u2014it\u2019s in the country \/ it\u2019s a back road\u2014there\u2019s no traffic. At about 11:00\/11:30 at night, I had\u2014I don\u2019t know\u2014a dozen giggling 14- and 15-year-old girls in the back of my pick up. It was like we were trying to sneak up on one of their friend\u2019s houses. It was like a circus coming into the neighborhood at midnight. I mean, their friend busted them\u2014I mean, they all broke out of the woods when they heard them coming down the road. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThose are great memories to have. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI used to have a 3x5 card on a lampshade by my telephone at the office: \u201cAt the end of the day, make sure you have been found guilty of having too much fun rather than too little.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know, the foundation for all of this\u2014before you can become the dad that God has called you to be \/ before you can become the husband that God\u2019s called you to be, you have to be the man God\u2019s called you to be \/ you have to be the person that God has called you to become. That\u2019s at the heart of the book that you\u2019ve written for men called <em>Stepping Up: A Call to Courageous Manhood. <\/em>I know many of our listeners have, not only read that book\u2014a lot of our listeners have gotten that book and passed it on to sons or to fathers. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, I was thinking about this\u2014in honor of Father\u2019s Day, rather than the father getting the gifts, maybe the dad ought to buy some books to pass out to his sons\u2014you know, he could be the gift-giver. We\u2019ve got copies of the <em>Stepping Up <\/em>book available in our <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>Resource Center, along with other resources for dads. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou\u2019ve written a book on interviewing your daughters\u2019 dates; a book for dads of sons called <em>Aggressive Girls, Clueless Boys<\/em>; and we\u2019ve got the <em>Stepping Up<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup>video series that\u2019s a great tool for a dad to take his sons through if they\u2019re high school-, or college-aged, or older\u2014great series for fathers and sons to go through together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAll of these resources are available to be ordered from us, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY to order. Again, our website is FamilyLifeToday.com. You can call 1-800-358-6329 to order\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur goal, here, at FamilyLife is to help dads and moms \/ husbands and wives to be the men and women that God has called them to be <em>first<\/em> and then to live that out in their marriage and in their family. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe want to effectively develop godly marriages and families. We want to see every home a godly home. This radio program is all about that goal\u2014the same goes for our website, the resources we\u2019re creating \/ the events that we\u2019re hosting. It all has that same aim in mind. When you become a partner with us, here, at FamilyLife, what you\u2019re doing is helping us expand and accelerate our mission. You\u2019re helping us reach more people all over the world. So, \u201cThank you,\u201d to our Legacy Partners \/ \u201cThank you,\u201d to those of you who will, from time to time, stop to make a donation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019re a regular listener to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, and you\u2019re not yet a part of the team that is helping to advance this mission, we\u2019d love to have you join us. You can donate online at FamilyLifeToday.com; you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY; or you can mail your donation to us at <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; the zip code is 72223. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019ve benefitted from this ministry in any way, help others benefit, as well, by becoming a part of the team that makes <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> possible in your community and all around the world.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we hope you can be back with us again tomorrow when we\u2019re going to hear some more great thoughts from some great thinkers about being a dad. I hope you can tune in for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2017 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/304544","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=304544"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=304544"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=304544"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=304544"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=304544"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=304544"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=304544"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}