{"id":304350,"date":"2017-01-23T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2017-01-23T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/parenting-with-mercy\/"},"modified":"2017-01-23T12:00:00","modified_gmt":"2017-01-23T17:00:00","slug":"parenting-with-mercy","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/parenting-with-mercy\/","title":{"rendered":"Parenting With Mercy"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>guest: Paul David Tripp | Series: Parenting | Paul David Tripp talks honestly about parenting children with the love, wisdom, and mercy only God can provide. Tripp recalls a few of his own parenting failures. While children need the law for guidance, Tripp reminds parents the law has no power to change the heart. Only grace can do that.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Paul David Tripp talks honestly about parenting children with the love, wisdom, and mercy only God can provide. Tripp reminds parents the law has no power to change the heart. Only grace can do that.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-01-23.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"24.51M","filesize_raw":"25699498","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2852,2833,2806],"tags":[4632,2209,4633],"podcast_series":[7265],"cwp_profile":[3097],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-304350","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-discipline","category-godly-legacy","category-spiritual-development","tag-mercy","tag-parenting","tag-parenting-skills","podcast_series-parenting","cwp_profile-paul-david-tripp","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/304350\/parenting-with-mercy","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/304350\/parenting-with-mercy","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"JvpEB8VuPT\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/parenting-with-mercy\/\">Parenting With Mercy<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/parenting-with-mercy\/embed\/#?secret=JvpEB8VuPT\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Parenting With Mercy&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"JvpEB8VuPT\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-01-23.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-01-23.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>When your children mess up, what\u2019s your first reaction as a parent? Here\u2019s Paul David Tripp.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Our tendency is just to come armed with the law: \u201cThis is what you did. How dare you? And this is what you\u2019re going to get.\u201d Now, let me say something about that. Do our children need the law? Yes, they do; because the law does a beautiful job of exposing sin. Do our children need the law? Yes, they do; because it\u2019s a wonderful guide for life. But the law has no power whatsoever to change the heart of your child\u2014none. If the law could change your child, Jesus would have never had to come.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday, January 23<sup>rd<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. So, as parents, how do we get to the heart of the matter? How do we get to the heart of our child when we\u2019re trying to teach and correct? We\u2019ll talk with Paul David Tripp about that today. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. So, we\u2019re going to get right to it today; don\u2019t you think?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I have a great question to ask our guest on the broadcast; but I have to introduce him first, even though all of our listeners know who he is. Dr. Paul David Tripp joins us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Paul David, welcome back to the broadcast\u2014you actually came back volitionally as an act of your will.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>That\u2019s right. I will admit I enjoy being with you guys. [Laughter] I don\u2019t know what that says about me or about you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It could seem dangerous\u2014it could be dangerous, Paul.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPaul is married to Luella\u2014they have four grown children. He\u2019s a pastor \/ an author, and Paul David has written a new book called <em>Parenting: 14 Gospel Principles That Can Radically Change Your Family<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMost guests\u2014Paul David\u2014I begin where the author does\u2014at the beginning of the book. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn your case, I decided, since you were such a good friend, that I would go all the way out to nearly the last chapter in the book, where you talk about a parent\u2019s need to exhibit mercy and how no parent can give mercy unless they have received mercy. You begin with the story about yourself. You know, you\u2019re really good at using illustrations about yourself that remove any of the mythology or of a phantom of a perfect parent, from the reader\u2019s opinion of you. This is a tongue-lashing you gave your teenage son.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes. You know, I think any honest parent can relate to these moments, where you\u2019ve just had it. You march into a room and you let your child just have it\u2014there were no questions asked, there\u2019s no desire to help him see himself to grow in his awareness \/ to grow in his sense of personal need\u2014there\u2019s just nothing but, \u201cI\u2019m letting you have it.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen I walk down the hallway. I\u2019m sitting on my own bed and I\u2019m reflecting on what I just did. I\u2019m just <em>filled<\/em> with a sense of guilt and remorse. I mean, that man in that bedroom\u2014that\u2019s not the man I want to be. That\u2019s a moment where I cry out for God\u2019s help. I think it was a moment where I said something that every parent needs to say: \u201cGod, I can\u2019t do what You have asked me to do with my kids. I can\u2019t do it, because I don\u2019t have, independently, what it takes to be what You want me to be with Your children.\u201d I think that is the <em>core<\/em> of what produces good parenting.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I couldn\u2019t agree more. For years, I\u2019ve called it the prayer of a helpless parent. You cry out, as a parent\u2014you say, \u201cGod, would You be merciful to me, as a parent, and would You help?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe has to <em>love<\/em> that kind of helplessness and the admission of that, because then He can do something great.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>See, I\u2019m persuaded\u2014in things like parenting\u2014inability is not in the way of good parenting \/ delusions of ability are. Think about this\u2014there\u2019s no place in life where God calls us because we\u2019re able \/ He calls us because He\u2019s able.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>And getting that is <em>so important<\/em>. I mean, what do I want from that moment? I want to be an able parent who, by my words, has the power to turn the heart of my child\u2014I don\u2019t have that ability! I never had it\u2014I\u2019ll never have it. Owning my inability is very, very important. The delusion of ability means I\u2019m going to say and do things I shouldn\u2019t do to try to create what I don\u2019t have the power to create.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Some of our listeners are probably wondering what your son did to provoke the anger.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It was a day\u2014it wasn\u2019t one thing that he did. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt was all day long\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014he had been a pain.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But the reality is\u2014it almost doesn\u2019t matter what our kids do that provokes our anger; because, as a friend of mine said once\u2014she had a mother come to her, who said, \u201cI was never an angry person until I had teenagers.\u201d [Laughter] My friend wisely said, \u201cNo, you were always an angry person; it just took a teenager to bring it out of you.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes; that\u2019s absolutely right. I mean, \u201cWhat do I want out of life?\u201d I want people around me that love me and follow me. I want days to be predictable, and I want to drive on roads paid for by other citizens who choose not to use them\u2014I mean, of course!\u2014because sin, in all of us, tends to push us to the middle of the world and make things all about us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhy do parents personalize things that aren\u2019t personal? I mean, my son, that day, didn\u2019t get up, thinking, \u201cI\u2019m going to wreck my dad\u2019s day, and I\u2019m going to enjoy it.\u201d That\u2019s <em>not<\/em> what was going on. That\u2019s what it feels like to me, because I have myself in a position I\u2019m not actually in. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, it\u2019s not, \u201cWow, this is a lost young man who needs God\u2019s rescue,\u201d\u2014that\u2019s not what\u2019s in my brain. What\u2019s in my brain is: \u201cHow dare you do this to me? Do you know who I am? Do you know what I do for you?\u201d So it makes it personal. Well, if it\u2019s personal, then, by the time I get to the room, I don\u2019t have ministry intention\u2014it\u2019s adversarial. That\u2019s what\u2019s going on.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, I think, if you\u2019re honest, as a parent, you know what that struggle is. Being able to confess that is such a sweet thing. Knowing, as a parent, that there\u2019s nothing in the process of parenting that will ever be exposed about you that hasn\u2019t already been covered by the blood of Jesus means I can be honest about my struggle, as a parent. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI don\u2019t have to have a front; I don\u2019t have to hide; I don\u2019t have to deny\u2014I\u2019ve been liberated from that stuff. It\u2019s such a burden to have to be perfect.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But we\u2019ve all been where you were\u2014frustrated, watching our kids make foolish choices or, in some cases, make intentionally evil choices, where they\u2019ve acted in deliberately sinful ways. Some parents get angry \/ some parents just say, \u201cWell, there\u2019s nothing I can do about that,\u201d\u2014get passive. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat do I do, as a parent, that\u2019s going to be the right way to respond to foolishness or evil being manifested by my kids and that\u2019s going to bring about this radical change that you talk about in your book?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Here\u2019s what I would say\u2014and my answer\u2019s going to need explanation\u2014that our tendency is just to come armed with the law: \u201cThis is what you did. How dare you? And this is what you\u2019re going to get.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, let me say something about that. Do our children need the law? Yes, they do; because the law does a beautiful job of exposing sin. Do our children need the law? Yes, they do; because it\u2019s a wonderful guide for life. But here\u2019s what you need to understand\u2014the law has no power, whatsoever, to change to the heart of your child\u2014none. If the law could change your child, Jesus would have never had to come.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>So, I want to respond to my child with grace. Now, parents, don\u2019t misunderstand me. Grace is not about calling wrong right. If wrong were right, there\u2019d be no need for grace. The assumption of grace is that wrong is wrong; but now I\u2019m moving toward this child and I\u2019m saying: \u201cWhat is it that God wants for this young person right now?\u201d and \u201cHow can I be part of what God is alone able to do? I can\u2019t change him! I\u2019ve no ability to do that at all, but God can. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cAnd what does it look like, in this moment, to be God\u2019s tool in the life of this young person?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s a whole different set of questions rather than, \u201cHow can I make him <em>feel<\/em> the weight of what he\u2019s done to me?\u201d\u2014that\u2019s just judgment! If God responded to us that way\u2014if the wise heavenly Father responded to me that way\u2014I have no hope as one of His children.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What I hear you saying in that is that the motivation we need to have, as parents, is a motivation of redemptive intent in the life of a child\u2014not a motivation that says: \u201cI\u2019d like life to be easier around here,\u201d or \u201c\u2026quieter around here,\u201d or \u201c\u2026less painful than it is,\u201d\u2014but a motivation that says: \u201cI would like you to grow in grace. I would like you to grow in wisdom. I would like you to grow in sanctification, and I\u2019m here to be a part of that journey with you.\u201d Is that what we ought to be motivated by?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Sure; and a principal part of that is\u2014understand, largely, change is a process, not an event. God\u2019s called me\u2014as God does with us\u2014to commit myself to 10,000 conversations \/ 10,000 moments.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me say it this way\u2014I think this is <em>so important<\/em> to get hold of\u2014if your eyes ever see and your ears ever hear the sin, weakness, and failure of your children\u2014it\u2019s never an accident, it\u2019s never an interruption, it\u2019s never a hassle\u2014it\u2019s always grace. God loves that child. He\u2019s put him in a family of faith, and He will reveal the need of that child to you so you can be God\u2019s tool of redemptive rescue and help. That\u2019s parenting!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I have to have you unpack the word, \u201cgrace,\u201d at this point. You used another word with it\u2014the word, \u201cprocess,\u201d\u2014the \u201cprocess of grace.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe word, \u201cgrace,\u201d is\u2014sung about, it\u2019s written about, it\u2019s talked about\u2014but it\u2019s, in my opinion, not very well understood, especially when applied like you\u2019re talking about here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want you to picture\u2014across the table from you is a parent, and they\u2019ve just heard it is by grace through faith that I experience redemption and salvation in Jesus Christ.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Help me understand how I take this concept of God\u2019s unmerited favor and practically work it out with a child who\u2019s caught red-handed in doing something wrong that is abhorrent \/ that does tick me off.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>So, I think our problem is that we talk about the <em>gift<\/em> of grace. We don\u2019t talk about the <em>process<\/em> of how grace operates. Think about, again, how the heavenly Father works in our life. He first blesses us with the grace of insight, because sin blinds us. I <em>know<\/em> my young person doesn\u2019t see himself with accuracy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019re a sinner, give up the delusion that no one knows you better than you do. You don\u2019t know yourself as well as you think you do; because, as long sin is inside of us, there\u2019s spiritual blindness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, I\u2019m going to ask the question: \u201cWhat does God want my young person to see right now that he\u2019s not now seeing?\u201d and \u201cHow can I help him see it?\u201d That\u2019s followed by, then, the grace of conviction. I want to be part of that process, where the child begins to <em>own<\/em> his responsibility. \u201cWhat is conviction about?\u201d\u2014it is owning personal responsibility for my words and my behavior.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Give me an illustration of how that worked its way out in your family with your four kids.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>There\u2019s a series of questions I ask my children all the time. First one is: \u201cWhat was going on?\u201d\u2014I just want a telling of the situation. The second one\u2014now listen to where this goes: \u201cWhat were you thinking and feeling as that was happening?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Speaking, inwardly, now.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes; and then I say, \u201cWhat did you do in response?\u201d Why is that the third question\u2014not the second?\u2014because I want him to see that his response is not shaped by the pressures of the situation. His response is shaped by what he wanted in his heart.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFourth question: \u201cWhy did you do\u2026? What were you seeking to accomplish?\u201d What\u2019s that going after?\u2014motives. These are questions children would <em>never<\/em> ask themselves\u2014that\u2019s a job of a parent. Then, fifth question is: \u201cWhat was the result?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m trying to get the child to look at himself in ways a child would <em>never<\/em> look by themselves\u2014to begin to <em>own<\/em> what\u2019s in their heart, and the relationship between what they wanted and what they did, and then to recognize the consequences of those choices. Praise God! Praise God! Praise God if you get any good answers to those questions\u2014grace is operating. You have the grace of insight, the grace of conviction, followed by the grace of forgiveness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cHow can I represent in that child\u2019s life the gorgeous, forgiving grace of Jesus?\u201d Well, I\u2019m not going to beat you with the silent treatment. I\u2019m not going to act like you don\u2019t exist in the house because you made me mad. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m <em>not<\/em> going to do those things, because that\u2019s bitterness and that\u2019s vengeance\u2014that\u2019s not forgiveness.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>But there may be punishment.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Sure; sure. And again, the exercise of authority is a grace: \u201cWhen did God give His law to the Israelites?\u201d\u2014after He had redeemed them from captivity\u2014the giving of the law was grace. These people had no idea how to live and walk in relationship with God. The law\u2019s a gorgeous, gracious gift of God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen it\u2019s the grace of transformation: \u201cWhere, specifically, does God want to change this child? How can I be part of that?\u201d I want to change conversations with my child: \u201cWhat would it look like to respond to this situation in a different way\u2014in a way that honors God?\u2014 that owns your struggle?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd then, finally, the grace of deliverance. I want to hang in with this young person with these kinds of conversations, again and again, until\u2014what he once struggled with\u2014he doesn\u2019t struggle with anymore. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s the operation of grace. That\u2019s how God works in every one of our lives. I\u2019m His ambassador \/ I\u2019m His representative\u2014God makes His <em>invisible<\/em> grace visible in the lives of children by sending parents of grace to give grace to children who need grace.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That takes a pretty together, spiritually-mature mom or dad to be able to go through a process of grace like that in the life of a child.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You don\u2019t have to remember all those questions. Here\u2019s what I\u2019d say: You have to remember what God did for you.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And that\u2019s what I want you to do right now. There\u2019s a parent listening\u2014maybe there\u2019s a single person, who isn\u2019t a parent, who wants to be married someday and wants to be a parent\u2014or there\u2019s a married person, who\u2019s not a parent yet \/ they\u2019re not in this struggle\u2014but there\u2019s a person who\u2019s not sure what you\u2019re talking about in terms of experiencing the grace that comes that covers and offers forgiveness for all their sin\u2014all the times they\u2019ve broken the law. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIntroduce that person to Jesus Christ right now.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Well, from the moment of my birth, I was utterly unable to be what I\u2019m supposed to be and to do what I\u2019m supposed to do. God had every right to just turn His back on me and walk away; but in love that I think will take all of eternity to understand, He moved toward me. How\u2019d He do that? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe sent His Son, the Lord Jesus, to live the life I could never live\u2014to die the death that I deserved to die \/ to rise again, conquering sin and death\u2014so that I would know His forgiveness\u2014but not only His forgiveness\u2014His transforming grace. That means I don\u2019t have to hide, I don\u2019t have to lie, I don\u2019t have to act like something that I\u2019m not. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can walk into the presence of a holy God, because of what Jesus has done. I can say, \u201cI need help,\u201d and He will not turn His back on me; because every ounce of my potential rejection was covered by Jesus.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Grace is God\u2019s gift to me if I will, by faith, accept it and place my trust in Christ for the forgiveness of my sins. As an act of my will and a step of faith, I receive God\u2019s gift. I don\u2019t earn it \/ I don\u2019t deserve it, but it is the free gift of God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>And it initiates a process, as the New Testament says, of grace upon grace upon grace upon grace upon grace.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And that\u2019s what I was thinking about as you were talking\u2014grace not only gets us into heaven\u2014but it puts a little bit of heaven in us in the process of living out our 70-plus years of life on the planet\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Amen. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014and gives us the courage and the hope to keep on keeping on\u2014whether it be, as a single person, who\u2019d like to be married, and is disappointed\u2014or whether it\u2019s a parent, who\u2019s in the throes of raising a four-year-old that is lying, cheating, stealing \/ all the things that four-year-olds can do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And by God\u2019s design, that grace that is planted in us grows over time so that the power of sin is weakened. Yet still, even when we\u2019ve walked in grace for decades, we can have days, where our kids push our buttons, and we can walk into their bedroom and not even turn on the light and just annihilate them with our words, and then go back to our room and feel the regret and the remorse of what we did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat did you do in that moment, Paul?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Well, see\u2014that remorse is grace. That pain that you feel is your Father coming near to you and doing exactly with you what we\u2019re saying to do with your children. So you go back to your child and you say: \u201cI don\u2019t want to be that guy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cI need your forgiveness. What your dad says you need, your dad needs as much as you do.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Did you say that to him?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And what did he say?\u2014because he cried \/ he was crying by the time you left the room.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes; he was crying. I can\u2019t repeat the whole conversation to you; but Justin said, \u201cDad, I love you,\u201d\u2014I mean, think about this in the heart of a child. Who wouldn\u2019t want a dad who comes back and says: \u201cI\u2019m a broken man. I\u2019m in need of redemption like you are. There are few things that you struggle with that I don\u2019t struggle with myself, and our hope is Jesus.\u201d That\u2019s the dad of your dreams! Why can I do that?\u2014because I know that I\u2019m forgiven.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>This is what I want parents to hear: \u201cThere\u2019s something much larger taking place here, as you raise a child, than what, more than likely, you ever imagined. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cGod has given you a divine assignment \/ a holy assignment\u2014a life-long assignment\u2014of being a parent. Will you rise to the occasion and assume your responsibility before Almighty God and realize, in your brokenness, that you\u2019re going to need grace \/ you\u2019re going to need mercy just like Paul David said he did?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut in those moments, that\u2019s when you\u2019re going to be most powerful, as a parent; because you will be, not only a recipient, but also a dispenser. I hate to use those kinds of words; but as a human being, we can pass on what we have received. That\u2019s what kids need today\u2014a connection with mom and dad that\u2019s real \/ that\u2019s not fake\u2014that\u2019s not a one-day-a-week-for-an-hour-at-church religious experience\u2014but that\u2019s connected with life, because you\u2019re connected to Almighty God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And that\u2019s the difference between gospel-fueled parenting and behavior modification. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m concerned that a lot of Christian parents today are simply doing behavior modification. They\u2019re not getting to the heart of the issues they need to be dealing with\u2014with their children. That\u2019s what you\u2019re pointing us to in the book you\u2019ve written, Paul, which is called <em>Parenting: 14 Gospel Principles That Can Radically Change Your Family<\/em>. We have copies of Paul\u2019s book in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center, and you can go online at FamilyLifeToday.com to order a copy of <em>Parenting<\/em> by Paul David Tripp. Again, our website is FamilyLifeToday.com. If you\u2019d prefer to order by phone, call 1-800-FL-TODAY\u20141-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of our chief goals, here at FamilyLife, is to encourage men and women to be intentionally passing on faith to the next generation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe can\u2019t do anything to see our kids converted other than pray for them\u2014that\u2019s a work that God does in their heart and in their lives\u2014but we can, as parents, be pointing them toward the gospel. Of course, we can be praying for them as well. We just think men and women need to be more intentional about that\u2014moms and dads need to recognize that is our primary goal as parents.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to say a word, here, to our Legacy Partners, those folks who provide the funding necessary for <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, month in and month out. Your partnership with us is helping us equip more and more moms and dads, and aunts and uncles, and even grandparents to address issues in the lives of their children and grandchildren\u2014but to address those issues with the gospel as the framework for what you\u2019re trying to do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe depend on our monthly Legacy Partners to help cover the cost associated with distributing this message to more and more people, not only here in the United States, but all around the world. I want to thank those of you who are Legacy Partners. As we start a brand-new year, if you\u2019re a regular listener but you\u2019ve never become a Legacy Partner\u2014you\u2019re not supporting this ministry on a monthly basis\u2014would you consider doing that today? You can find out more when you go to FamilyLifeToday.com. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you make a first-time donation today, whether it\u2019s a one-time gift or it\u2019s your first gift as a new monthly Legacy Partner, we would love to send you the Ever Thine Home<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> heart-shaped chalkboard that Barbara Rainey has just created. It\u2019s our gift to you when you become a Legacy Partner today or when you give a gift to support the ministry of FamilyLife. You can do that, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com. You can call to donate at 1-800-FL-TODAY; or you can mail your donation to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTomorrow, we want to talk about those times in parenting when we have to pull rank\u2014we have to exercise our authority over our children\u2014we have to discipline them. What should our goal be when those times occur? We\u2019ll talk about that tomorrow with Paul David Tripp. I hope you can be back with us for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t______________________________________________________________________________\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\"><u>donating today<\/u><\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2017 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["24.51M"],"filesize_raw":["25699498"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-304350.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-304350.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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David Tripp talks honestly about parenting children with the love, wisdom, and mercy only God can provide. Tripp reminds parents the law has no power to change the heart. Only grace can do that.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2017-01-23.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>When your children mess up, what\u2019s your first reaction as a parent? Here\u2019s Paul David Tripp.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Our tendency is just to come armed with the law: \u201cThis is what you did. How dare you? And this is what you\u2019re going to get.\u201d Now, let me say something about that. Do our children need the law? Yes, they do; because the law does a beautiful job of exposing sin. Do our children need the law? Yes, they do; because it\u2019s a wonderful guide for life. But the law has no power whatsoever to change the heart of your child\u2014none. If the law could change your child, Jesus would have never had to come.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday, January 23<sup>rd<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. So, as parents, how do we get to the heart of the matter? How do we get to the heart of our child when we\u2019re trying to teach and correct? We\u2019ll talk with Paul David Tripp about that today. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. So, we\u2019re going to get right to it today; don\u2019t you think?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I have a great question to ask our guest on the broadcast; but I have to introduce him first, even though all of our listeners know who he is. Dr. Paul David Tripp joins us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Paul David, welcome back to the broadcast\u2014you actually came back volitionally as an act of your will.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>That\u2019s right. I will admit I enjoy being with you guys. [Laughter] I don\u2019t know what that says about me or about you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It could seem dangerous\u2014it could be dangerous, Paul.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPaul is married to Luella\u2014they have four grown children. He\u2019s a pastor \/ an author, and Paul David has written a new book called <em>Parenting: 14 Gospel Principles That Can Radically Change Your Family<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMost guests\u2014Paul David\u2014I begin where the author does\u2014at the beginning of the book. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn your case, I decided, since you were such a good friend, that I would go all the way out to nearly the last chapter in the book, where you talk about a parent\u2019s need to exhibit mercy and how no parent can give mercy unless they have received mercy. You begin with the story about yourself. You know, you\u2019re really good at using illustrations about yourself that remove any of the mythology or of a phantom of a perfect parent, from the reader\u2019s opinion of you. This is a tongue-lashing you gave your teenage son.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes. You know, I think any honest parent can relate to these moments, where you\u2019ve just had it. You march into a room and you let your child just have it\u2014there were no questions asked, there\u2019s no desire to help him see himself to grow in his awareness \/ to grow in his sense of personal need\u2014there\u2019s just nothing but, \u201cI\u2019m letting you have it.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen I walk down the hallway. I\u2019m sitting on my own bed and I\u2019m reflecting on what I just did. I\u2019m just <em>filled<\/em> with a sense of guilt and remorse. I mean, that man in that bedroom\u2014that\u2019s not the man I want to be. That\u2019s a moment where I cry out for God\u2019s help. I think it was a moment where I said something that every parent needs to say: \u201cGod, I can\u2019t do what You have asked me to do with my kids. I can\u2019t do it, because I don\u2019t have, independently, what it takes to be what You want me to be with Your children.\u201d I think that is the <em>core<\/em> of what produces good parenting.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I couldn\u2019t agree more. For years, I\u2019ve called it the prayer of a helpless parent. You cry out, as a parent\u2014you say, \u201cGod, would You be merciful to me, as a parent, and would You help?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe has to <em>love<\/em> that kind of helplessness and the admission of that, because then He can do something great.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>See, I\u2019m persuaded\u2014in things like parenting\u2014inability is not in the way of good parenting \/ delusions of ability are. Think about this\u2014there\u2019s no place in life where God calls us because we\u2019re able \/ He calls us because He\u2019s able.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>And getting that is <em>so important<\/em>. I mean, what do I want from that moment? I want to be an able parent who, by my words, has the power to turn the heart of my child\u2014I don\u2019t have that ability! I never had it\u2014I\u2019ll never have it. Owning my inability is very, very important. The delusion of ability means I\u2019m going to say and do things I shouldn\u2019t do to try to create what I don\u2019t have the power to create.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Some of our listeners are probably wondering what your son did to provoke the anger.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It was a day\u2014it wasn\u2019t one thing that he did. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt was all day long\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014he had been a pain.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But the reality is\u2014it almost doesn\u2019t matter what our kids do that provokes our anger; because, as a friend of mine said once\u2014she had a mother come to her, who said, \u201cI was never an angry person until I had teenagers.\u201d [Laughter] My friend wisely said, \u201cNo, you were always an angry person; it just took a teenager to bring it out of you.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes; that\u2019s absolutely right. I mean, \u201cWhat do I want out of life?\u201d I want people around me that love me and follow me. I want days to be predictable, and I want to drive on roads paid for by other citizens who choose not to use them\u2014I mean, of course!\u2014because sin, in all of us, tends to push us to the middle of the world and make things all about us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhy do parents personalize things that aren\u2019t personal? I mean, my son, that day, didn\u2019t get up, thinking, \u201cI\u2019m going to wreck my dad\u2019s day, and I\u2019m going to enjoy it.\u201d That\u2019s <em>not<\/em> what was going on. That\u2019s what it feels like to me, because I have myself in a position I\u2019m not actually in. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, it\u2019s not, \u201cWow, this is a lost young man who needs God\u2019s rescue,\u201d\u2014that\u2019s not what\u2019s in my brain. What\u2019s in my brain is: \u201cHow dare you do this to me? Do you know who I am? Do you know what I do for you?\u201d So it makes it personal. Well, if it\u2019s personal, then, by the time I get to the room, I don\u2019t have ministry intention\u2014it\u2019s adversarial. That\u2019s what\u2019s going on.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, I think, if you\u2019re honest, as a parent, you know what that struggle is. Being able to confess that is such a sweet thing. Knowing, as a parent, that there\u2019s nothing in the process of parenting that will ever be exposed about you that hasn\u2019t already been covered by the blood of Jesus means I can be honest about my struggle, as a parent. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI don\u2019t have to have a front; I don\u2019t have to hide; I don\u2019t have to deny\u2014I\u2019ve been liberated from that stuff. It\u2019s such a burden to have to be perfect.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But we\u2019ve all been where you were\u2014frustrated, watching our kids make foolish choices or, in some cases, make intentionally evil choices, where they\u2019ve acted in deliberately sinful ways. Some parents get angry \/ some parents just say, \u201cWell, there\u2019s nothing I can do about that,\u201d\u2014get passive. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat do I do, as a parent, that\u2019s going to be the right way to respond to foolishness or evil being manifested by my kids and that\u2019s going to bring about this radical change that you talk about in your book?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Here\u2019s what I would say\u2014and my answer\u2019s going to need explanation\u2014that our tendency is just to come armed with the law: \u201cThis is what you did. How dare you? And this is what you\u2019re going to get.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, let me say something about that. Do our children need the law? Yes, they do; because the law does a beautiful job of exposing sin. Do our children need the law? Yes, they do; because it\u2019s a wonderful guide for life. But here\u2019s what you need to understand\u2014the law has no power, whatsoever, to change to the heart of your child\u2014none. If the law could change your child, Jesus would have never had to come.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>So, I want to respond to my child with grace. Now, parents, don\u2019t misunderstand me. Grace is not about calling wrong right. If wrong were right, there\u2019d be no need for grace. The assumption of grace is that wrong is wrong; but now I\u2019m moving toward this child and I\u2019m saying: \u201cWhat is it that God wants for this young person right now?\u201d and \u201cHow can I be part of what God is alone able to do? I can\u2019t change him! I\u2019ve no ability to do that at all, but God can. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cAnd what does it look like, in this moment, to be God\u2019s tool in the life of this young person?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s a whole different set of questions rather than, \u201cHow can I make him <em>feel<\/em> the weight of what he\u2019s done to me?\u201d\u2014that\u2019s just judgment! If God responded to us that way\u2014if the wise heavenly Father responded to me that way\u2014I have no hope as one of His children.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What I hear you saying in that is that the motivation we need to have, as parents, is a motivation of redemptive intent in the life of a child\u2014not a motivation that says: \u201cI\u2019d like life to be easier around here,\u201d or \u201c\u2026quieter around here,\u201d or \u201c\u2026less painful than it is,\u201d\u2014but a motivation that says: \u201cI would like you to grow in grace. I would like you to grow in wisdom. I would like you to grow in sanctification, and I\u2019m here to be a part of that journey with you.\u201d Is that what we ought to be motivated by?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Sure; and a principal part of that is\u2014understand, largely, change is a process, not an event. God\u2019s called me\u2014as God does with us\u2014to commit myself to 10,000 conversations \/ 10,000 moments.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me say it this way\u2014I think this is <em>so important<\/em> to get hold of\u2014if your eyes ever see and your ears ever hear the sin, weakness, and failure of your children\u2014it\u2019s never an accident, it\u2019s never an interruption, it\u2019s never a hassle\u2014it\u2019s always grace. God loves that child. He\u2019s put him in a family of faith, and He will reveal the need of that child to you so you can be God\u2019s tool of redemptive rescue and help. That\u2019s parenting!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I have to have you unpack the word, \u201cgrace,\u201d at this point. You used another word with it\u2014the word, \u201cprocess,\u201d\u2014the \u201cprocess of grace.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe word, \u201cgrace,\u201d is\u2014sung about, it\u2019s written about, it\u2019s talked about\u2014but it\u2019s, in my opinion, not very well understood, especially when applied like you\u2019re talking about here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want you to picture\u2014across the table from you is a parent, and they\u2019ve just heard it is by grace through faith that I experience redemption and salvation in Jesus Christ.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Help me understand how I take this concept of God\u2019s unmerited favor and practically work it out with a child who\u2019s caught red-handed in doing something wrong that is abhorrent \/ that does tick me off.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>So, I think our problem is that we talk about the <em>gift<\/em> of grace. We don\u2019t talk about the <em>process<\/em> of how grace operates. Think about, again, how the heavenly Father works in our life. He first blesses us with the grace of insight, because sin blinds us. I <em>know<\/em> my young person doesn\u2019t see himself with accuracy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019re a sinner, give up the delusion that no one knows you better than you do. You don\u2019t know yourself as well as you think you do; because, as long sin is inside of us, there\u2019s spiritual blindness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, I\u2019m going to ask the question: \u201cWhat does God want my young person to see right now that he\u2019s not now seeing?\u201d and \u201cHow can I help him see it?\u201d That\u2019s followed by, then, the grace of conviction. I want to be part of that process, where the child begins to <em>own<\/em> his responsibility. \u201cWhat is conviction about?\u201d\u2014it is owning personal responsibility for my words and my behavior.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Give me an illustration of how that worked its way out in your family with your four kids.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>There\u2019s a series of questions I ask my children all the time. First one is: \u201cWhat was going on?\u201d\u2014I just want a telling of the situation. The second one\u2014now listen to where this goes: \u201cWhat were you thinking and feeling as that was happening?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Speaking, inwardly, now.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes; and then I say, \u201cWhat did you do in response?\u201d Why is that the third question\u2014not the second?\u2014because I want him to see that his response is not shaped by the pressures of the situation. His response is shaped by what he wanted in his heart.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFourth question: \u201cWhy did you do\u2026? What were you seeking to accomplish?\u201d What\u2019s that going after?\u2014motives. These are questions children would <em>never<\/em> ask themselves\u2014that\u2019s a job of a parent. Then, fifth question is: \u201cWhat was the result?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m trying to get the child to look at himself in ways a child would <em>never<\/em> look by themselves\u2014to begin to <em>own<\/em> what\u2019s in their heart, and the relationship between what they wanted and what they did, and then to recognize the consequences of those choices. Praise God! Praise God! Praise God if you get any good answers to those questions\u2014grace is operating. You have the grace of insight, the grace of conviction, followed by the grace of forgiveness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cHow can I represent in that child\u2019s life the gorgeous, forgiving grace of Jesus?\u201d Well, I\u2019m not going to beat you with the silent treatment. I\u2019m not going to act like you don\u2019t exist in the house because you made me mad. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m <em>not<\/em> going to do those things, because that\u2019s bitterness and that\u2019s vengeance\u2014that\u2019s not forgiveness.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>But there may be punishment.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Sure; sure. And again, the exercise of authority is a grace: \u201cWhen did God give His law to the Israelites?\u201d\u2014after He had redeemed them from captivity\u2014the giving of the law was grace. These people had no idea how to live and walk in relationship with God. The law\u2019s a gorgeous, gracious gift of God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen it\u2019s the grace of transformation: \u201cWhere, specifically, does God want to change this child? How can I be part of that?\u201d I want to change conversations with my child: \u201cWhat would it look like to respond to this situation in a different way\u2014in a way that honors God?\u2014 that owns your struggle?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd then, finally, the grace of deliverance. I want to hang in with this young person with these kinds of conversations, again and again, until\u2014what he once struggled with\u2014he doesn\u2019t struggle with anymore. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s the operation of grace. That\u2019s how God works in every one of our lives. I\u2019m His ambassador \/ I\u2019m His representative\u2014God makes His <em>invisible<\/em> grace visible in the lives of children by sending parents of grace to give grace to children who need grace.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That takes a pretty together, spiritually-mature mom or dad to be able to go through a process of grace like that in the life of a child.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You don\u2019t have to remember all those questions. Here\u2019s what I\u2019d say: You have to remember what God did for you.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And that\u2019s what I want you to do right now. There\u2019s a parent listening\u2014maybe there\u2019s a single person, who isn\u2019t a parent, who wants to be married someday and wants to be a parent\u2014or there\u2019s a married person, who\u2019s not a parent yet \/ they\u2019re not in this struggle\u2014but there\u2019s a person who\u2019s not sure what you\u2019re talking about in terms of experiencing the grace that comes that covers and offers forgiveness for all their sin\u2014all the times they\u2019ve broken the law. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIntroduce that person to Jesus Christ right now.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Well, from the moment of my birth, I was utterly unable to be what I\u2019m supposed to be and to do what I\u2019m supposed to do. God had every right to just turn His back on me and walk away; but in love that I think will take all of eternity to understand, He moved toward me. How\u2019d He do that? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe sent His Son, the Lord Jesus, to live the life I could never live\u2014to die the death that I deserved to die \/ to rise again, conquering sin and death\u2014so that I would know His forgiveness\u2014but not only His forgiveness\u2014His transforming grace. That means I don\u2019t have to hide, I don\u2019t have to lie, I don\u2019t have to act like something that I\u2019m not. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can walk into the presence of a holy God, because of what Jesus has done. I can say, \u201cI need help,\u201d and He will not turn His back on me; because every ounce of my potential rejection was covered by Jesus.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Grace is God\u2019s gift to me if I will, by faith, accept it and place my trust in Christ for the forgiveness of my sins. As an act of my will and a step of faith, I receive God\u2019s gift. I don\u2019t earn it \/ I don\u2019t deserve it, but it is the free gift of God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>And it initiates a process, as the New Testament says, of grace upon grace upon grace upon grace upon grace.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And that\u2019s what I was thinking about as you were talking\u2014grace not only gets us into heaven\u2014but it puts a little bit of heaven in us in the process of living out our 70-plus years of life on the planet\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Amen. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014and gives us the courage and the hope to keep on keeping on\u2014whether it be, as a single person, who\u2019d like to be married, and is disappointed\u2014or whether it\u2019s a parent, who\u2019s in the throes of raising a four-year-old that is lying, cheating, stealing \/ all the things that four-year-olds can do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And by God\u2019s design, that grace that is planted in us grows over time so that the power of sin is weakened. Yet still, even when we\u2019ve walked in grace for decades, we can have days, where our kids push our buttons, and we can walk into their bedroom and not even turn on the light and just annihilate them with our words, and then go back to our room and feel the regret and the remorse of what we did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat did you do in that moment, Paul?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Well, see\u2014that remorse is grace. That pain that you feel is your Father coming near to you and doing exactly with you what we\u2019re saying to do with your children. So you go back to your child and you say: \u201cI don\u2019t want to be that guy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cI need your forgiveness. What your dad says you need, your dad needs as much as you do.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Did you say that to him?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And what did he say?\u2014because he cried \/ he was crying by the time you left the room.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Paul: <\/strong>Yes; he was crying. I can\u2019t repeat the whole conversation to you; but Justin said, \u201cDad, I love you,\u201d\u2014I mean, think about this in the heart of a child. Who wouldn\u2019t want a dad who comes back and says: \u201cI\u2019m a broken man. I\u2019m in need of redemption like you are. There are few things that you struggle with that I don\u2019t struggle with myself, and our hope is Jesus.\u201d That\u2019s the dad of your dreams! Why can I do that?\u2014because I know that I\u2019m forgiven.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>This is what I want parents to hear: \u201cThere\u2019s something much larger taking place here, as you raise a child, than what, more than likely, you ever imagined. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cGod has given you a divine assignment \/ a holy assignment\u2014a life-long assignment\u2014of being a parent. Will you rise to the occasion and assume your responsibility before Almighty God and realize, in your brokenness, that you\u2019re going to need grace \/ you\u2019re going to need mercy just like Paul David said he did?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut in those moments, that\u2019s when you\u2019re going to be most powerful, as a parent; because you will be, not only a recipient, but also a dispenser. I hate to use those kinds of words; but as a human being, we can pass on what we have received. That\u2019s what kids need today\u2014a connection with mom and dad that\u2019s real \/ that\u2019s not fake\u2014that\u2019s not a one-day-a-week-for-an-hour-at-church religious experience\u2014but that\u2019s connected with life, because you\u2019re connected to Almighty God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And that\u2019s the difference between gospel-fueled parenting and behavior modification. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m concerned that a lot of Christian parents today are simply doing behavior modification. They\u2019re not getting to the heart of the issues they need to be dealing with\u2014with their children. That\u2019s what you\u2019re pointing us to in the book you\u2019ve written, Paul, which is called <em>Parenting: 14 Gospel Principles That Can Radically Change Your Family<\/em>. We have copies of Paul\u2019s book in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center, and you can go online at FamilyLifeToday.com to order a copy of <em>Parenting<\/em> by Paul David Tripp. Again, our website is FamilyLifeToday.com. If you\u2019d prefer to order by phone, call 1-800-FL-TODAY\u20141-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of our chief goals, here at FamilyLife, is to encourage men and women to be intentionally passing on faith to the next generation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe can\u2019t do anything to see our kids converted other than pray for them\u2014that\u2019s a work that God does in their heart and in their lives\u2014but we can, as parents, be pointing them toward the gospel. Of course, we can be praying for them as well. We just think men and women need to be more intentional about that\u2014moms and dads need to recognize that is our primary goal as parents.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to say a word, here, to our Legacy Partners, those folks who provide the funding necessary for <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, month in and month out. Your partnership with us is helping us equip more and more moms and dads, and aunts and uncles, and even grandparents to address issues in the lives of their children and grandchildren\u2014but to address those issues with the gospel as the framework for what you\u2019re trying to do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe depend on our monthly Legacy Partners to help cover the cost associated with distributing this message to more and more people, not only here in the United States, but all around the world. I want to thank those of you who are Legacy Partners. As we start a brand-new year, if you\u2019re a regular listener but you\u2019ve never become a Legacy Partner\u2014you\u2019re not supporting this ministry on a monthly basis\u2014would you consider doing that today? You can find out more when you go to FamilyLifeToday.com. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you make a first-time donation today, whether it\u2019s a one-time gift or it\u2019s your first gift as a new monthly Legacy Partner, we would love to send you the Ever Thine Home<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> heart-shaped chalkboard that Barbara Rainey has just created. It\u2019s our gift to you when you become a Legacy Partner today or when you give a gift to support the ministry of FamilyLife. You can do that, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com. You can call to donate at 1-800-FL-TODAY; or you can mail your donation to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTomorrow, we want to talk about those times in parenting when we have to pull rank\u2014we have to exercise our authority over our children\u2014we have to discipline them. What should our goal be when those times occur? We\u2019ll talk about that tomorrow with Paul David Tripp. I hope you can be back with us for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t______________________________________________________________________________\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\"><u>donating today<\/u><\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2017 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/304350","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=304350"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=304350"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=304350"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=304350"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=304350"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=304350"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=304350"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}