{"id":304302,"date":"2016-12-20T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2016-12-20T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/delivering-truth-in-relationships\/"},"modified":"2016-12-20T12:00:00","modified_gmt":"2016-12-20T17:00:00","slug":"delivering-truth-in-relationships","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/delivering-truth-in-relationships\/","title":{"rendered":"Delivering Truth in Relationships"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>How do you disciple followers of Christ, when the norms of the culture&#8211;not the Bible&#8211;define the worldview? Hear some respected pastors and their wives offer their perspective on this challenging topic.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2016-12-20.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"22.9M","filesize_raw":"24017344","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2848,2815],"tags":[4317,5931],"podcast_series":[8183],"cwp_profile":[9438,3076,8802],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-304302","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-cultural-issues","category-sexual-wholeness","tag-biblical-worldview","tag-gender-identity","podcast_series-ministering-to-families-in-the-21st-century","cwp_profile-chris-and-susan-willard","cwp_profile-crawford-loritts","cwp_profile-karen-loritts","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/304302\/delivering-truth-in-relationships","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/304302\/delivering-truth-in-relationships","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"Gmp6NTtUyY\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/delivering-truth-in-relationships\/\">Delivering Truth in Relationships<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/delivering-truth-in-relationships\/embed\/#?secret=Gmp6NTtUyY\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Delivering Truth in Relationships&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"Gmp6NTtUyY\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg",508,508,false]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"kfairris@familylife.com","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/kfairrisfamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"How do you disciple followers of Christ, when the norms of the culture--not the Bible--define the worldview? Hear some respected pastors and their wives offer their perspective on this challenging topic.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2016-12-20.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>When it comes to addressing sexual sin in our churches, is it possible that today we\u2019ve developed some kind of a two-tiered sin grading system? Crawford Loritts says he thinks that may be the case.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Crawford: <\/strong>You know, it\u2019s amazing to me\u2014there are probably a lot of couples in our church who are living together. What will surprise you are the ones who have been believers for a long time, and they know the Scriptures, and they\u2019re living together. But they view that as sin with a small \u201cs,\u201d because we have a culture that \u201cAffirmation is everything.\u201d The culture defines love as \u201cAffirmation of choices and behavior.\u201d But my line is\u2014when it comes up, you have to speak truth to it; because the gospel presupposes tension. The tension between grace and truth is love. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou help <em>no one<\/em> by saying that their sinful behavior is okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI happen to think the chaos in the culture \/ the confusion in the culture is a bright and shining moment for us right now. What we need to do is not critique, critique, critique; but give gospel-deliverables and hold high the truth. You\u2019ll never impact that which you are too impressed with or you\u2019re trying to get to like you, but you have to authentically love them and get close to them so that they <em>feel<\/em> and sense the love of the Lord Jesus.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Tuesday, December 20<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. It\u2019s important for us, as Christians, to be consistent with what the Scriptures teach when it comes to our sexual ethic. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ll hear a conversation on that subject today. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Tuesday edition. Have you ever found yourself, listening to conversations taking place in the culture and somebody gets asked a tough question and you think, \u201cBoy, I wonder how I would have answered that\u201d? I mean\u2014some of the questions that get tossed our way, as followers of Christ\u2014there are no easy answers to those questions.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>If you were going to put together a panel to toss some hot potato questions to, the panel that we have on today\u2019s broadcast, Bob, is about as good as it gets.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I mean, these are <em>seasoned<\/em> veterans, who have been leaders of churches\/organizations for decades. They\u2019ve also been moms and dads \/ husbands and wives in the trenches with their own families.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We asked these couples to join us as a part of our 40<sup>th<\/sup> anniversary celebration. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAll year long, we have been celebrating 40 years of ministry, here at FamilyLife. We\u2019ve been doing that by highlighting the hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of anniversaries that have been celebrated because of how God has used this ministry over the years. During the month of December, as we wrap up this 40<sup>th<\/sup> anniversary celebration, we\u2019re wrapping it up with a special opportunity for listeners to stand with us and to express your support for this ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve had some friends, who have made a matching gift available. Our friend, Michelle Hill, has been keeping tabs on how the contributions are coming in as it relates to this matching gift. Michelle, give us an update; can you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I sure can, Bob. You know as listeners have heard, the matching gift total that we\u2019re trying to meet is one and a quarter million dollars, and so far, as of today, we\u2019ve received seven hundred twenty-four thousand dollars from four thousand five hundred listeners.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd you know, the consensus from listeners like Ellie, Maria, Benjamin and others is that this triple match is a great way for them to support what God is doing in marriages and families. If you agree, we\u2019re inviting you to join thousands of your fellow listeners by donating at FamilyLife.com or calling 1-800-FLTODAY.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And when you give, you make ministries like this possible on a daily basis. Recently, we had American Heritage Girls featured on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. I wrote the CEO a question\u2014I said, \u201cDid our broadcast create any interest of moms and daughters wanting to start an American Heritage Girls club for girls?\u201d\u2014kind of a Girl Scouts type of club. She wrote me back and said, \u201cDid it ever!\u201d She said, \u201cYour broadcast resulted in over 1,000 responses from listeners wanting either to start a club or to participate in one, all across the country.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe do that, day in and day out, here on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. We partner with other ministries and promote their causes \/ what they\u2019re about. If you agree with that\u2014with that approach of a ministry that partners with others aggressively, I need you to pick up a phone and call 1-800-FL-TODAY or go online to FamilyLifeToday.com and make a donation, knowing that your donation will be a part of the match, here in December.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Our website, again, is FamilyLifeToday.com; and our toll-free number is 1-800-FL-TODAY. \u201cThanks,\u201d in advance, for your support of this ministry.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, today, we\u2019re going to hear from a panel\u2014you mentioned this earlier, Dennis\u2014friends of this ministry. Three of these four couples speak at our <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> marriage getaways. The fourth couple\u2014he pastors a large church in Dallas, Texas. We asked all four of these couples to come and talk about how we stand for truth, but stand with love, in this culture. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBryan and Stephanie Carter joined us on the panel\u2014he is the pastor at Concord Church in South Dallas. Crawford and Karen Loritts were also here\u2014he pastors Fellowship Bible Church in Roswell, Georgia. Jeff and Debbie Schreve were here with us\u2014he\u2019s the pastor at First Baptist Church in Texarkana, Texas. And Chris and Susan Willard were here\u2014and Chris works with Leadership Network, working with churches all across the country.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe talked about the issues of marriage and family. Crawford Loritts made an interesting observation in the middle of our conversation\u2014he said, \u201cI\u2019m not sure church-goers today are being taught how to think biblically about the issues we\u2019re facing.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Crawford: <\/strong>Swirling around all of this is that we do not think critically enough, or we do not think distinctively biblically enough. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat's part of the problem\u2014even in fine, Bible-teaching churches. It is a framework of thinking about these things. We've allowed the culture to give us the glossary of terms and their definitions. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, for example, this whole issue of identity. In the Bible, identity is declarative\u2014identity is outside of yourself\u2014it's what God says about you. It is <em>not<\/em> how you feel about yourself. But we <em>assume<\/em> that, because I have these feelings and I have these inclinations\u2014your inclination is not your identity. Identity is <em>declarative<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs Christians, we have this messy thinking. It causes us to play into these things, and we make a set of assumptions that we shouldn't even make about those things. I think that's a <em>huge<\/em> piece.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to get back to something else also. You know, we don't do tensions really well as Christians. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are prone to be binary. We don't do tensions real well. And yet the gospel presupposes tension. The tension between grace and truth is love\u2014that's a definition of love. It's abuse to be on either side of that tension. I think that's where we have to <em>live<\/em>. You help <em>no one<\/em>\u2014you help <em>no one<\/em>\u2014by saying that their sinful behavior is okay. You help no one with that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe culture defines love as \u201cAffirmation of choices and behavior.\u201d Well, God doesn't define unconditional love that way. And yet we have to be careful that we're not held hostage, and our message is not held hostage, and the gospel's not held hostage to that; because if that's deliverable, then we just lost the power of the gospel itself to deliver the person, although they're attracted to us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes. Chris.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Chris: <\/strong>Yes; I think, too, we have to remember that truth travels best over the path of relationship. Sometimes this sort of lobbing truth from afar into the cultural conversation is not very helpful.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Chris: <\/strong>So, you know, we wonder why we're not being very effective in making headway in this area. It's because we're thinking of it as \"us\" and \"them\" and forgetting that, for many of us, we're one or two degrees separated from someone who\u2014I mean, in this room, here, we have sons, and daughters, and siblings, and cousins, who are in the LGBT community. Yet, we still sort of lob truth from afar as opposed to engaging the best we can, where we can.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have just found, in my own life, if you want to communicate a message to me that I need to hear, it's better if it comes through the pathway of a loving relationship as opposed to some sort of message from afar.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I'm going to turn the corner to a different subject here; but before I do, just a quick question\u2014somebody calls First Baptist, Texarkana, and says: \"We're interested in coming this weekend. I just want to know\u2014are you guys a gay-affirming church?\" \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jeff: <\/strong>If I got the call, I would say: \"We <em>want<\/em> you to come. We would <em>love<\/em> for you to come. We're going to teach you what the Bible says about relationships, and how God set up life, and what He says will make your life go and good, and what He says is going to hurt you.\" I think setting it up that way is very, very important. I've said before, from the pulpit, \"I <em>want<\/em> you to come if you're struggling like this, because we want to love you and we want to always tell you the truth.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the things, too, I think about preaching from the pulpit\u2014you're not talking about anyone in particular\u2014it's not the same as a one-on-one conversation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou are just talking to the masses. Adrian Rogers had a lady get mad at him, one time, about his sermon. He said: \"Hey, I'm shooting in a barrel. It's not my fault if you're down in there.\" [Laughter] I think that's really <em>true<\/em>. We're presenting things: \u201cThis is not to <em>you<\/em>. This is to <em>all<\/em> of us\u2014this is what God says if you want to experience His joy, His peace, and His love.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Let me turn the corner to this. We'll start on the far end again. A couple comes to First Baptist, Texarkana. They've been there for three months. There's kind of a little buzz because they're living together, and everybody in town knows they're living together. At what point does that come up or get addressed, or do you leave it alone, or what do you do?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jeff: <\/strong>I think it comes up when they want to join, or if they want to serve, or something like that. Then we would talk to them. If I get to know them, then I would talk to them about that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI've had wonderful experiences of marrying people like that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe did an <em>I Still Do<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> event just last year. The guy wasn't married\u2014living with his girlfriend\u2014been living with her for almost ten years \/ two kids. I said, \"Eric, it's time.\" He said, \"Can I do it at the <em>I Still Do<\/em> event, where we repeat the vows?\u201d I said, \u201cOkay, but I need an honorarium.\u201d No! I didn\u2019t! [Laughter] I didn\u2019t say that. I said, \u201cThat would be great!\u201d We all repeated vows, just like we did at the FamilyLife conference. He said that to his spouse-to-be for the first time, and they were married that night.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Bryan, you\u2019ve had a similar situation to what Jeff\u2019s describing. You\u2019ve done this twice. You\u2019re about to do it a third time; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bryan: <\/strong>Right. A few years ago, I was just challenged by the whole issue of cohabitation: \u201cHow do we address it, biblically?\u201d I decided to preach on it. I began talking to my team, and I preached a sermon on the truth about cohabitation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI began to address it, biblically, in terms of what God teaches about cohabitation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt the end of the message, I said: \u201cWe have three options now that you know the truth. One\u2014move out if you\u2019re in it \/ move out of relationship. Two\u2014move away, which means help teach your children and your friends God\u2019s plan and not just what the culture says. The third option is to marry now, in 90 days. Meet me after church at 2:00 in Room 100 if you\u2019re living together. We\u2019ll have you married in 90 days. We\u2019ll put you through counseling \/ we\u2019ll give you a free wedding. We\u2019ll take care of the cake \/ tuxedo\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>A free wedding?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bryan: <\/strong>\u2014at the church.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Wow!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bryan: <\/strong>So they have a couple hours to make a decision. There were quite the conversations happening. [Laughter] Some guys picked the wrong day to come to church! [Laughter] Because they had no idea what I was going to address. That afternoon\u2014we\u2019ve done this <em>twice<\/em>\u2014and now, we have our third group that\u2019s in counseling. We have 29 couples that will be married next <em>month<\/em>. [Laughter] [Applause]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Chris: <\/strong>You might have some people moving in together so that they can get a free wedding. [Laughter] You know what I\u2019m saying? That could be a good strategy right there!\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u201cFree cake, free tuxedo\u2014we just move in together; we got it!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Chris: <\/strong>That\u2019s it!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Crawford, how has this come up at Fellowship in Roswell?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Crawford: <\/strong>Well, it comes up. I think, by and large, our folks\u2014if they\u2019ve been around our church long enough\u2014know where we stand on that. A lot of it is under the radar. You know, it\u2019s amazing to me\u2014there are probably a lot of couples in our church who are living together\u2014a lot. What will surprise you are the ones who have been believers for a long time, and they know the Scriptures, and they\u2019re living together. But they view that as sin with a small \u201cs,\u201d because we have a culture that \u201cAffirmation is everything.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Crawford: <\/strong>\u201cAffirming my choices is everything. So, you don\u2019t judge me. There are a lot of things worse than that.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, it gets down to discipleship, and counseling, and stuff; but my line is: \u201cWhen it comes up, you have to speak truth to it.\u201d I love what Bryan\u2019s done\u2014in fact, I\u2019m thinking about how that might be a church-growth strategy at our church to do that. [Laughter] That\u2019s good; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Chris.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Chris: <\/strong>Well, we had a situation our pastor was sharing with us. I serve as an elder at our church. Our pastor was describing a situation\u2014a young woman, who was in our worship team, who was confronted; because she was living with her boyfriend. She was asked to step down from the team\u2014which she understood, and she agreed to do. But her response was: \u201cWell, we\u2019re going to get married soon. After we get married, I can join the team again, right?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat he, I think very wisely, revealed was that that\u2019s really not the issue; because all this time she knew that what she was doing was out of bounds. Before she\u2019s able to step back into the worship team, she\u2019s going to need to demonstrate that she\u2019s walking with the Lord and she\u2019s walking in truth.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It\u2019s not a behavior issue\u2014it\u2019s a heart issue.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Chris: <\/strong>Yes; right. So it\u2019s not, \u201cWell, okay. We got married; so now we\u2019re good.\u201d It\u2019s revealing something else, and I think it\u2019s important for us to recognize that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Sixty percent of those who will get married this year have lived together prior to marriage. It\u2019s the new norm in our culture. Fewer than ten percent of those getting married today are virgins when they say, \u201cI do.\u201d We know, when we\u2019re talking to engaged couples at the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> getaway, we\u2019re talking to folks\u2014more who are living together \/ more who are having sex than are not. We have to understand how we address this. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKaren, what were you going to say?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Karen: <\/strong>Yes; I want to say this too\u2014this is my twelfth year in the baseball chapel for the Atlanta Braves. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThese are the girlfriends, the fianc\u00e9es, and the wives that I meet with during home games during the season. A couple years ago, it hit me that I\u2019m talking about marriage from the Bible and all of that\u2014and some of these girls are living with the guys, even the ones who don\u2019t have a ring yet. I asked the Bible chapel leader \/ the male whom I report to\u2014I said: \u201cWhat\u2019s with the women and the guys \/ your players living together, and they\u2019re coming to Bible studies? He\u2019s coming to chapel every Sunday, doing the Bible study; and she\u2019s coming to Bible study and sitting here with the Bibles and all that.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen my leader told me: \u201cThis is the thinking of these young people. \u2018Because\u2019\u2014let\u2019s say\u2014\u2018Sally and I live together during the season and throughout the year, we\u2019re a couple. We just happen not to be married, and we\u2019re committed; otherwise, I would be a groupie and that would be a sin.\u2019\u201d To me, that was crazy! It was a lack of training and a lack of\u2014but to them, it\u2019s <em>commitment<\/em> because \u201cWe\u2019re committed to just the two of us.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I\u2019m going to ask each one of you, and we\u2019re going to wrap things up here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBy the way, this is helpful. We <em>care<\/em> about this passionately. So what would your\u2014as we\u2019re looking at how we do this effectively in the coming decade \/ in the coming 20 years, I want to know what your charge to us would be as we go forward. This charge needs to be about 30 seconds each, but everybody gets to offer one; okay? You have yours?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bryan: <\/strong>I would say this\u2014I would say: \u201cThis is our time. Despite what we see happening in the culture, the gospel works best in dark situations. Everything that we see\u2014the redefinition of marriage, the sexual revolution \/ all of this\u2014is God calling the church to be the church. So FamilyLife\u2014what they\u2019re doing is exactly what God called us to do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cThree quick things: We have to be courageous. We can\u2019t step back\u2014we have to be <em>engaged<\/em> in this season. We have to be courageous. We have to be creative\u2014we have to find creative ways, not just to call out the sin, but help people get a pathway out of the sin situation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cAnd then last, we have to be <em>connected<\/em>. It has to be about relationships\u2014social media\/technology\u2014using everything that we can to <em>connect<\/em> people to the truth of God\u2019s Word.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That\u2019s good. Stephanie?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Stephanie: <\/strong>Ditto.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Just \u201cAmen,\u201d on that? [Laughter] I tell you what\u2014that\u2019ll preach; right there!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Stephanie: <\/strong>Yes; that will preach right there\u2014I live with him \/ I worship with him. I\u2019ll also say: \u201cBe very intentional, especially with your children.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes. Chris.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Chris: <\/strong>I love when Jesus was talking to His followers about loving our neighbors. They said, \u201cLord, who is my neighbor?\u201d I think my charge would be to ask the Lord: \u201cLord, who is my neighbor? Who are the people in my life\u2014who I can personally care about and minister to\u2014who are perhaps in a different community or view the world differently than I do?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Good. Susan.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan: <\/strong>Well, of course, we need to be connected to the people in our lives and ask the Holy Spirit constantly\/regularly: \u201cShow me the words to say. Help me in this situation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cWhat is it you want me to say right now? I just need to obey and listen to the Lord.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Crawford: <\/strong>I happen to think the chaos in the culture \/ the confusion in the culture is a bright and shining moment for us right now and that what we need to do is not critique, critique, critique; but give gospel deliverables and hold high the truth. You\u2019ll never impact that which you\u2019re too impressed with or you\u2019re trying to get to like you, but you have to authentically love them and get close to them so that they <em>feel<\/em> and sense the love of the Lord Jesus. Compromise will not do it, and being too enamored with the response of an audience will not do it. Authentic love will, and finding out how they respond to the truth of the gospel and going there with it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That\u2019s good. Karen.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Karen: <\/strong>I would think, also, as we talk about truth and all of that, it\u2019s that we need to equip parents to talk to their kids about how to face these things that they\u2019re going to be faced with in their schools \/ in their communities\u2014whether it\u2019s resources or whatever. I would <em>love<\/em> to see something like that to equip our culture.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Debbie: <\/strong>I think the most important thing for me, personally, is just continually pray for God\u2019s wisdom and for discernment\u2014and to know when it\u2019s an edifying word and when it just needs to be a hug\u2014and to just use God\u2019s discernment in that. The Holy Spirit would lead you and guide you to do that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Jeff.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jeff: <\/strong>I think that the prayer that the disciples prayed in Acts, Chapter 4, where they said, \u201cLord, give us boldness,\u201d I think that\u2019s <em>huge<\/em> today. There are two words that we use in our church: \u201cshine\u201d and \u201cshare.\u201d It just kind of encapsulates what we\u2019re to do on this earth\u2014shine for Christ: \u201cLet your light so shine among men\u2026\u201d\u2014and then be bold enough to share the truth. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAlways speak it in love\u2014but not to hide it under a bushel\u2014but to let it out and let people know: \u201cHey, Jesus is the Way, the Truth, and the Life. Unless you come His way, you\u2019re not going to come to the Father.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I am grateful that we\u2019re allies in this work together. I appreciate these folks so much. Would you thank them? [Applause]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well again, we\u2019ve been listening to a conversation that took place a few months ago as we had friends of this ministry joining us. We talked about the fact that standing for truth in this culture is not easy, but it\u2019s still the right thing to do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>There are a lot of thorny issues today, Bob, that weren\u2019t on the rosebush three or four decades ago, when we started FamilyLife. Forty years is a generation\u2014a <em>lot<\/em> of things can change in a generation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just want to remind our listeners: \u201cWhen you support <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, you are supporting this kind of messaging occurring on a regular basis on this station. Frankly, here at yearend, we\u2019d like to hear from you if you want this broadcast to continue standing strong in this community.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You can go to our website at FamilyLifeToday.com to make an online donation, or call 1-800-FLTODAY to donate over the phone. Or you can mail your donation to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; and our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBy the way, when you go to our website, check out the book that Dr. Al Mohler has written called <em>We Cannot Be Silent<\/em>. He offers answers to some of these tough questions that we\u2019ve heard addressed today. In one section of the book he took a couple of dozen questions from students, and he offered a biblical response to each of those questions. I think that\u2019s a great part of this book. Again, you can order it from us at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to order at 1-800-358-6329. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to be tackling different kinds of questions. We had an opportunity, not long ago, to get together with a number of listeners and had an informal Q&amp;A session with Dennis, and Barbara, and me. We\u2019ll spend time hearing some of our listeners\u2019 questions and our responses to those questions tomorrow. I hope you can tune in for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t______________________________________________________________________________\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\"><u>donating today<\/u><\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2016 FamilyLife. 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