{"id":304096,"date":"2016-07-22T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2016-07-22T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/sufficient-grace\/"},"modified":"2016-07-22T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2016-07-22T15:00:00","slug":"sufficient-grace","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/sufficient-grace\/","title":{"rendered":"Sufficient Grace"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>guest: Ken and Joni Tada | Series: An Untold Love Story | The Bible tells us that as we journey through this life, we will have troubles, but do our troubles have to define us? According to Joni Tada, we should be defined by how we respond to troubles. Hear from quadriplegic and cancer survivor Joni and her husband, Ken, as they discuss how life&#8217;s marathon continues into a new and richer season.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>According to Joni Tada, we should be defined by how we respond to troubles. Hear from quadriplegic and cancer survivor Joni and her husband, Ken.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2016-07-22.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"27.84M","filesize_raw":"29195785","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2849,2885,2860],"tags":[6051,4350,6050,6048,4663,6049],"podcast_series":[7943],"cwp_profile":[9064],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-304096","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-drifting-apart","category-good-marriages-made-better","category-hardship-and-suffering","tag-cancer-survivor","tag-character","tag-commitment-in-marriage","tag-gods-grace","tag-quadriplegic","tag-refining-faith","podcast_series-an-untold-love-story","cwp_profile-ken-and-joni-tada","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/304096\/sufficient-grace","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/304096\/sufficient-grace","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"sQR92XymW5\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/sufficient-grace\/\">Sufficient Grace<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/sufficient-grace\/embed\/#?secret=sQR92XymW5\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Sufficient Grace&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"sQR92XymW5\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2016-07-22.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2016-07-22.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And we can stay delicate right here. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>We will stay delicate, too; but you\u2019re a quadriplegic, for those who don\u2019t know your story. You had an accident when you were 17 years old. You had a great fear\u2014going into this marriage\u2014that he was going to find out what it meant to care for someone who was so helpless.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>Okay; well, let\u2019s talk about the brass tacks. Ken and I went off on our honeymoon. We took two friends \/ two girlfriends of mine\u2014who stayed at a different hotel, down the beach\u2014but they would come up during the mornings and evenings and kind of like educate Ken on my routines\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014not to throw everything at him at once\u2014but just to kind of get his feet wet: \u201cThis is what it means for Joni to get up in the morning\u2014bed, bath, exercising her legs, and then those toileting routines.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, I had to do a particular toileting routine in the evening. I don\u2019t know how to say this\u2014Ken had to help carry me to the bathroom, and I didn\u2019t make it. When that happened\u2014it\u2019s funny\u2014I choke up, talking about it now, 30 years later. Yet, it\u2019s so long ago and far away, but I was the young girl\u2014I wanted everything to be perfect. I wanted my husband to have great illusions of me and \u201cThis is going to be wonderful! Everything is so romantic!\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYet, I remember that first night, lying in bed after the lights were out and all was quiet. I fought back the tears: \u201cOh, God! This man\u2014You are going to have to give him grace. You\u2019re just going to have to! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cYou have to give him grace because I don\u2019t know that even I have the grace. But help him through this, Lord. You can do this! Help him through this!\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt was a desperate cry of a very young bride, but I\u2019m so glad God answered because things did not get easier in our ensuing life together. There were even greater challenges but, at every turn, I saw God\u2019s grace show up in my husband\u2019s life. <em>That<\/em> was <em>huge<\/em>, and that\u2019s growth.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>There are times in every marriage, after the honeymoon\u2014in fact, there are seasons that occur\u2014where you move into a bit of a valley. Obviously, your marriage started in one and has continued on in one, but you move into something where there is\u2014you describe in your book as \u201cnegotiated spaces\u201d and \u201cdemilitarized zones\u201d in your relationship. You guys had a plateau \/ you kind of had the \u201cCease fire.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>I think it was those middle years, where Joni was going to the ministry and I was teaching high school. Basically, we were living together but separate lives \/ parallel lives\u2014not that our marriage was bad\u2014it\u2019s just I was occupied with what I was doing, as a high school teacher, and Joni was occupied in the ministry. We would travel during the summers. So, there were a lot of connections; but during those school days, I mean, I don\u2019t think we spent the kind of time that\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You were teaching at the time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>I was teaching high school; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>And I was fearful that I was making Ken depressed \/ my disability was depressing my husband. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo I would be very careful to take care of as many routines as I could possibly do before he came home from school so that I would not have to walk on eggshells and ask him to do anything for me that might encroach on his emotions because I knew that asking too much of Ken would plummet him into depression. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor a long time, it was this strange tap dance that we both played, where we had to negotiate these spaces. But through it all \/ through it all, we both recognized we were doing this; and we didn\u2019t want to live this way. So we prayed\u2014prayed together and prayed separately\u2014that God would help move us beyond this emotional fog that we were in to help us see the possibilities in our marriage, that were ahead on the horizon.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>I think the other thing that happened during that time, Joni, was\u2014especially, this was earlier in our marriage\u2014but because of your notoriety, people would recognize you when we were in public. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the things that was really hard\u2014that we look back on it now\u2014was we\u2019d go to church. There\u2019d be a line of people, half an hour long, who would want to speak to you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was finding my\u2014if I had a self-image problem, it was healed when I went to school because: \u201cThat was my classroom. Those were my students.\u201d When I was in Burbank, those were people who recognized me\u2014not that I needed it\u2014but it was just that self-assurance \/ that affirmation I was getting through what I was doing\u2014that I think there was a balance there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>But to help move my husband past that: \u201cLet\u2019s go to a different church. Let\u2019s get out of this big church. Let\u2019s go to some small, little church.\u201d So, we started going to a small, very little church, just a few miles from our house. We stopped going to the big mega-church, where everybody knew me\u2014just trying to find ways, as a wife, to make it easier\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014finding that those negotiated spaces became smaller and smaller, to the point where we both were in it together. We weren\u2019t adversarial \/ we weren\u2019t on parallel tracks anymore\u2014we were on the same track. It took a while to get there, but we did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Did you feel invisible for a long period of time?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>Boy, that\u2019s a great description of exactly what I was feeling. You know, I mean, people would\u2014we would stand in a crowd. I would stand next to Joni, and nobody would want to talk to me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>But Joni has been so good about bringing me into the conversation. She would stop them and say: \u201cYou know, I want to introduce you to my husband. He\u2019s standing right here.\u201d She realized that, from that standpoint, that I needed that\u2014at least, in those early years that we were a couple. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think, over the years, it\u2019s gotten to the point where there are more people that recognize us <em>as<\/em> a couple. It hasn\u2019t been an issue. It actually has been kind of a benefit\u2014that I think, for the both us\u2014that we are recognized in a ministry for couples.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>In those early years, when you were struggling with your self-image, those were the same times I was struggling with my self-image. I would hear him on the phone with all his buddies, talking about all kinds of things that he wouldn\u2019t talk about with me. I\u2019d hear him hang up the phone, saying, \u201cLove ya, Buddy.\u201d It was like: \u201cAhh! Gee, I don\u2019t hear that tone of voice with me.\u201d I remember being so\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Now, wait a second\u2014[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>No! I felt\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014<em>the<\/em> Joni Eareckson Tada could have a pity party; really?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>Oh, my goodness! In the early years of my marriage, when I would hear him on the phone with Jan or Pete, I\u2019d be so jealous of his tone of voice with his guy friends. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut okay; later on in the marriage, as we\u2019re praying \/ as I\u2019m seeking God, \u201cHow can I get my husband out of depression?\u201d Boing! This light bulb went off in my head, and I realized: \u201cHe needs his guy friends. Don\u2019t be jealous of them, Joni\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>\u2014\u201cput him in their camp.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Wow!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni:<\/strong> So, I began encouraging Ken: \u201cYou know, your buddy Jan has been asking you to go fly fishing. Please, really, why don\u2019t you go fly fishing? Get away from the tuna boats\u2014you gaff tuna, blood on the decks, guys with big bellies and cans of beer, cursing and profanity\u2014get away from that. Go fly fishing\u2014it\u2019s more refined. You\u2019re going to enjoy it!\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI mean, I was the one who kind of pushed him\u2014not so much because I wanted to get him away from the tuna boats\u2014but I knew, that if he was with his Christian guy friends, that it would be invigorating \/ that he would get a validation, as a man, from other men that would help him and help our marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni:<\/strong> I think that was one of the best moves I made to help you up and out of your depression.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>Joni was the instrumental tool for getting me into fly fishing. I mean, I really didn\u2019t, at the time, want to go fly fishing. I didn\u2019t want another sport; but she said, \u201cNo, you ought to go.\u201d More than the fly fishing, I have a friend and we have a ministry to men. We use fly fishing as kind of like\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014the bait. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>\u2014the bait; exactly. [Laughter] You know, it gives guys a chance to get their hearts back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>We talk about all kinds of things. We use John Eldredge\u2019s book, <em>Wild at Heart<\/em>, but\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>\u2014but you got your heart back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>\u2014but I got my heart back. Joni is a big supporter of what I do there. But one of the things that happened was\u2014you know, a little exercise that we had was to go out and try to hear what God had to say to us. The first time I did this, I didn\u2019t hear a thing. Two years later, I can tell you exactly where I was on a fly fishing trip. A gentleman said, \u201cTake this afternoon and go out and try to hear God\u2019s voice.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat afternoon, I heard God say to me\u2014not in an audible voice\u2014but I heard Him say: \u201cJoni is the most important gift I\u2019ve given you. You take care of her.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And, in your book, you talk about when he came back from that trip\u2014you saw it in his eyes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>Oh, my goodness! He stood in the bedroom and said, \u201cJoni, you\u2019re never going to believe what God said to me.\u201d He shoved his hands in his pockets, rocked back and forth on his heels, and said, \u201cGod said that you\u2019re the most precious gift, and I\u2019m to take care of you, and I\u2019m going to do it.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt was like a breath of fresh air had just blown through our bedroom. It was like the fog of depression is lifting\u2014I can see the sun \/ the clouds. There\u2019s hope! My husband likes me! He wants to take care of me, for the sake of Christ. I began to see all my prayers answered or, at least, beginning to get answers. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd now\u2014even back then\u2014when his buddies call the house, and I get them on the phone, before I hand it over to Ken\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[I say:] \u201cJan, God bless you. Sir, I don\u2019t know what you\u2019re doing in my husband\u2019s life. Keep it up. I know you\u2019re memorizing Scripture. I know you\u2019re doing some new Jerry Bridges Bible study together on the phone. Keep it up! I love it. You\u2019re going in the right direction.\u201d I\u2019m thanking Pete, I\u2019m thanking Chris, and I\u2019m thanking Jan\u2014all these guys, that I used to be jealous of\u2014they\u2019re the <em>best<\/em> because they help my husband be the man that he can be.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And that story occurred\u2014what I want our listeners to hear\u201421 years into your marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And the next time you go out with Pete, and Jan, and Chris, we\u2019ve got a resource for you to take with you\u2014a Bible study for guys called <em>Stepping Up\u2122<\/em>, based on Dennis\u2019s book by that title. It\u2019s a video resource, and it\u2019ll spark some great discussion with you and the guys; okay?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>Great. Thank you, Bob.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>One last story, Joni\u2014and this one\u2019s for you. You battled cancer \/ you went through chemotherapy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn the process of going through that, fell prey to pneumonia. You had a moment, in the midst of that, that was pretty grim. You had your own encounter when God spoke to you. Would you share with our listeners that story? I think that is incredibly powerful.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>Well, as a quadriplegic, I\u2019m susceptible to things like pneumonia. I have extremely limited lung capacity. I had to be in the hospital for nine or ten days. My husband, bless his heart, made a little cot, out of a couple of plastic chairs. He slept by my bedside. Instead of me having to be intubated, Ken got up every night\u2014would cough me\u2014pound on my chest.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne night, I was so exhausted\u2014I had so flattened out, emotionally\u2014I was crying out to God. I had no physical ability. My lungs were gurgling \/ I could hardly breathe\u2014I felt like I was drowning. I just didn\u2019t want to have to get my husband up another time. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember saying: \u201cLord Jesus, I need You. I need to see You tonight. I just need to feel Your touch. I need to feel Your hand on my head. I need You!\u201d I fell into a sleep. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, when I woke up with the gurgling, and needed to be coughed again, Ken came over to my hospital bedside. As he began to lift me up, I looked at him, wide-eyed. I said: \u201cYou\u2019re Him! Oh, my goodness, you\u2019re Him!\u201d Jesus visited me, that night, through my husband. I felt his hand on my forehead, and it was the touch of Jesus. I felt him push on my abdomen, and it was the strength of Jesus. I felt him pound on my back to give me air; and it was Jesus, the Breath of Life. Everything about my husband was Jesus. I said to Ken, \u201cYou\u2019re Him! Jesus showed up and you\u2019re Him!\u201d It was such a beautiful revelation of how God can answer prayer\u2014the prayers that are desperate, and show up best through them. That was a beautiful moment.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, we\u2019ve talked a lot about cancer \/ we\u2019ve talked a lot about quadriplegia. I\u2019m going to confess to you those things are a cinch compared to the daily grind of pain that I deal with. You know, through my PET scans\u2014a couple more years, and maybe I\u2019ll be declared cancer-free. Things are looking hopeful. My quadriplegia\u2014I kind of know that route. But, boy, the daily grind of pain is so hard. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy husband, a couple of weeks ago, did a beautiful thing. Before he saw me head out the door, he could see the look in my eyes that I was going to have a very painful day. He said: \u201cWait a minute. Wait a minute.\u201d He quick ran and got a stick-em, and etched on it a big \u201cC,\u201d and put it over my heart\u2014slapped it right over my heart. He said: \u201cThere you go, Joni. You\u2019ve got courage, and you\u2019re going to rise to that challenge.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think what I love best about my husband is that he can find the infinitesimally small Christ-like characteristics in my life\u2014he can find them, pick them out, and affirm them. He can water them and nurture them with actions such as he did with that stick-em on my chest. He believes that I can be courageous. I don\u2019t want to disappoint my wonderful husband. I want to be courageous, in Christ, for his sake and for the sake of the gospel. That is, honestly, how I get through the toughest days of my pain.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You both are courageous. Recently, I did a little Bible study in Joshua 1. There are three places where courage comes from: God\u2019s mission, being obedient to God\u2019s Word, and, third, practicing His presence. As I\u2019m watching your lives, as a couple, you\u2019re on mission\u2014you\u2019re on task, as a couple. You\u2019re about the glory of God and running the race to finish it well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSecondly, you\u2019ve both been obedient. You\u2019ve kept your covenant. You\u2019re not only still married\u2014you\u2019re lovin\u2019 each other. And, third, you\u2019re practicing the presence of God, whether it be fly fishing or whether it be flat on your back in a hospital room, battling pneumonia. You\u2019re experiencing the presence of God, and you\u2019re bringing a lot of hope to a lot of people. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> May God\u2019s favor be upon this book and you guys, as you go forward.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>Thank you, Dennis.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>Thank you, Dennis and Bob.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We hope a lot of our listeners will get a copy of the book you\u2019ve written. It\u2019s called <em>Joni and Ken: An Untold Love Story<\/em>\u201430 years of marriage, where you guys peel back the veneer and show us what real marriage is all about. I appreciate your candor here \/ the transparency and authenticity in what you\u2019ve written here. Again, the title of the book is <em>Joni and Ken: An Untold Love Story.<\/em> You can go online at FamilyLifeToday.com to order a copy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, the website is FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d You can order a copy of the book from us when you call\u2014again, the toll-free number is 1-800-FL-TODAY\u2014or find us online at FamilyLifeToday.com.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhile we\u2019re talking about love stories, we want to say, \u201cCongratulations!\u201d today to William and Doretha Jenkins, who live in Honolulu. Today is their 27<sup>th<\/sup> wedding anniversary. They listen to <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>on KGU. They help support the ministry \/ they\u2019ve attended a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup>. \u201cCongratulations!\u201d to the Jenkins and to any of our other listeners who are celebrating anniversaries today: \u201cHappy anniversary to you!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe think anniversaries are a big deal. We think couples staying together, and keeping their vows, and loving and honoring and cherishing\u2014we think that is all great stuff. That\u2019s what we\u2019re all about, here at FamilyLife. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you listen to this daily radio program\u2014whether it\u2019s on your local Christian station or on our new <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>app that you can find at your app store\u2014however you\u2019re listening, we hope that you\u2019re getting practical biblical help and hope for your marriage and for your family. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we want to thank our Legacy Partners, who help make all of this possible through their generosity\u2014and those of you who contribute, from time to time\u2014\u201cThank you,\u201d as well. In fact, if you\u2019d like to make a donation today or if you\u2019d like to see about becoming a Legacy Partner, go to FamilyLifeToday.com\u2014you can make an online donation\u2014or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY to donate over the phone. Or mail your donation to <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd with that, we\u2019re done for this week. Thanks for being with us. I hope you have a great weekend and hope you and your family can worship together in your local church this weekend. Then, join us back on Monday when we are going to talk about what life was like 40 years ago. We\u2019re going to look back to the very beginning of the ministry of FamilyLife. Dennis and Barbara Rainey will be here to share thoughts from the first year of ministry\u20141976. We\u2019ll hear about what God has done over the last four decades. I hope you can tune in for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We\u2019ll see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2016 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["27.84M"],"filesize_raw":["29195785"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-304096.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-304096.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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to Joni Tada, we should be defined by how we respond to troubles. Hear from quadriplegic and cancer survivor Joni and her husband, Ken.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2016-07-22.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And we can stay delicate right here. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>We will stay delicate, too; but you\u2019re a quadriplegic, for those who don\u2019t know your story. You had an accident when you were 17 years old. You had a great fear\u2014going into this marriage\u2014that he was going to find out what it meant to care for someone who was so helpless.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>Okay; well, let\u2019s talk about the brass tacks. Ken and I went off on our honeymoon. We took two friends \/ two girlfriends of mine\u2014who stayed at a different hotel, down the beach\u2014but they would come up during the mornings and evenings and kind of like educate Ken on my routines\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014not to throw everything at him at once\u2014but just to kind of get his feet wet: \u201cThis is what it means for Joni to get up in the morning\u2014bed, bath, exercising her legs, and then those toileting routines.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, I had to do a particular toileting routine in the evening. I don\u2019t know how to say this\u2014Ken had to help carry me to the bathroom, and I didn\u2019t make it. When that happened\u2014it\u2019s funny\u2014I choke up, talking about it now, 30 years later. Yet, it\u2019s so long ago and far away, but I was the young girl\u2014I wanted everything to be perfect. I wanted my husband to have great illusions of me and \u201cThis is going to be wonderful! Everything is so romantic!\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYet, I remember that first night, lying in bed after the lights were out and all was quiet. I fought back the tears: \u201cOh, God! This man\u2014You are going to have to give him grace. You\u2019re just going to have to! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cYou have to give him grace because I don\u2019t know that even I have the grace. But help him through this, Lord. You can do this! Help him through this!\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt was a desperate cry of a very young bride, but I\u2019m so glad God answered because things did not get easier in our ensuing life together. There were even greater challenges but, at every turn, I saw God\u2019s grace show up in my husband\u2019s life. <em>That<\/em> was <em>huge<\/em>, and that\u2019s growth.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>There are times in every marriage, after the honeymoon\u2014in fact, there are seasons that occur\u2014where you move into a bit of a valley. Obviously, your marriage started in one and has continued on in one, but you move into something where there is\u2014you describe in your book as \u201cnegotiated spaces\u201d and \u201cdemilitarized zones\u201d in your relationship. You guys had a plateau \/ you kind of had the \u201cCease fire.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>I think it was those middle years, where Joni was going to the ministry and I was teaching high school. Basically, we were living together but separate lives \/ parallel lives\u2014not that our marriage was bad\u2014it\u2019s just I was occupied with what I was doing, as a high school teacher, and Joni was occupied in the ministry. We would travel during the summers. So, there were a lot of connections; but during those school days, I mean, I don\u2019t think we spent the kind of time that\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You were teaching at the time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>I was teaching high school; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>And I was fearful that I was making Ken depressed \/ my disability was depressing my husband. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo I would be very careful to take care of as many routines as I could possibly do before he came home from school so that I would not have to walk on eggshells and ask him to do anything for me that might encroach on his emotions because I knew that asking too much of Ken would plummet him into depression. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor a long time, it was this strange tap dance that we both played, where we had to negotiate these spaces. But through it all \/ through it all, we both recognized we were doing this; and we didn\u2019t want to live this way. So we prayed\u2014prayed together and prayed separately\u2014that God would help move us beyond this emotional fog that we were in to help us see the possibilities in our marriage, that were ahead on the horizon.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>I think the other thing that happened during that time, Joni, was\u2014especially, this was earlier in our marriage\u2014but because of your notoriety, people would recognize you when we were in public. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the things that was really hard\u2014that we look back on it now\u2014was we\u2019d go to church. There\u2019d be a line of people, half an hour long, who would want to speak to you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was finding my\u2014if I had a self-image problem, it was healed when I went to school because: \u201cThat was my classroom. Those were my students.\u201d When I was in Burbank, those were people who recognized me\u2014not that I needed it\u2014but it was just that self-assurance \/ that affirmation I was getting through what I was doing\u2014that I think there was a balance there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>But to help move my husband past that: \u201cLet\u2019s go to a different church. Let\u2019s get out of this big church. Let\u2019s go to some small, little church.\u201d So, we started going to a small, very little church, just a few miles from our house. We stopped going to the big mega-church, where everybody knew me\u2014just trying to find ways, as a wife, to make it easier\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014finding that those negotiated spaces became smaller and smaller, to the point where we both were in it together. We weren\u2019t adversarial \/ we weren\u2019t on parallel tracks anymore\u2014we were on the same track. It took a while to get there, but we did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Did you feel invisible for a long period of time?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>Boy, that\u2019s a great description of exactly what I was feeling. You know, I mean, people would\u2014we would stand in a crowd. I would stand next to Joni, and nobody would want to talk to me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>But Joni has been so good about bringing me into the conversation. She would stop them and say: \u201cYou know, I want to introduce you to my husband. He\u2019s standing right here.\u201d She realized that, from that standpoint, that I needed that\u2014at least, in those early years that we were a couple. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think, over the years, it\u2019s gotten to the point where there are more people that recognize us <em>as<\/em> a couple. It hasn\u2019t been an issue. It actually has been kind of a benefit\u2014that I think, for the both us\u2014that we are recognized in a ministry for couples.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>In those early years, when you were struggling with your self-image, those were the same times I was struggling with my self-image. I would hear him on the phone with all his buddies, talking about all kinds of things that he wouldn\u2019t talk about with me. I\u2019d hear him hang up the phone, saying, \u201cLove ya, Buddy.\u201d It was like: \u201cAhh! Gee, I don\u2019t hear that tone of voice with me.\u201d I remember being so\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Now, wait a second\u2014[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>No! I felt\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014<em>the<\/em> Joni Eareckson Tada could have a pity party; really?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>Oh, my goodness! In the early years of my marriage, when I would hear him on the phone with Jan or Pete, I\u2019d be so jealous of his tone of voice with his guy friends. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut okay; later on in the marriage, as we\u2019re praying \/ as I\u2019m seeking God, \u201cHow can I get my husband out of depression?\u201d Boing! This light bulb went off in my head, and I realized: \u201cHe needs his guy friends. Don\u2019t be jealous of them, Joni\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>\u2014\u201cput him in their camp.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Wow!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni:<\/strong> So, I began encouraging Ken: \u201cYou know, your buddy Jan has been asking you to go fly fishing. Please, really, why don\u2019t you go fly fishing? Get away from the tuna boats\u2014you gaff tuna, blood on the decks, guys with big bellies and cans of beer, cursing and profanity\u2014get away from that. Go fly fishing\u2014it\u2019s more refined. You\u2019re going to enjoy it!\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI mean, I was the one who kind of pushed him\u2014not so much because I wanted to get him away from the tuna boats\u2014but I knew, that if he was with his Christian guy friends, that it would be invigorating \/ that he would get a validation, as a man, from other men that would help him and help our marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni:<\/strong> I think that was one of the best moves I made to help you up and out of your depression.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>Joni was the instrumental tool for getting me into fly fishing. I mean, I really didn\u2019t, at the time, want to go fly fishing. I didn\u2019t want another sport; but she said, \u201cNo, you ought to go.\u201d More than the fly fishing, I have a friend and we have a ministry to men. We use fly fishing as kind of like\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014the bait. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>\u2014the bait; exactly. [Laughter] You know, it gives guys a chance to get their hearts back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>We talk about all kinds of things. We use John Eldredge\u2019s book, <em>Wild at Heart<\/em>, but\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>\u2014but you got your heart back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>\u2014but I got my heart back. Joni is a big supporter of what I do there. But one of the things that happened was\u2014you know, a little exercise that we had was to go out and try to hear what God had to say to us. The first time I did this, I didn\u2019t hear a thing. Two years later, I can tell you exactly where I was on a fly fishing trip. A gentleman said, \u201cTake this afternoon and go out and try to hear God\u2019s voice.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat afternoon, I heard God say to me\u2014not in an audible voice\u2014but I heard Him say: \u201cJoni is the most important gift I\u2019ve given you. You take care of her.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And, in your book, you talk about when he came back from that trip\u2014you saw it in his eyes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>Oh, my goodness! He stood in the bedroom and said, \u201cJoni, you\u2019re never going to believe what God said to me.\u201d He shoved his hands in his pockets, rocked back and forth on his heels, and said, \u201cGod said that you\u2019re the most precious gift, and I\u2019m to take care of you, and I\u2019m going to do it.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt was like a breath of fresh air had just blown through our bedroom. It was like the fog of depression is lifting\u2014I can see the sun \/ the clouds. There\u2019s hope! My husband likes me! He wants to take care of me, for the sake of Christ. I began to see all my prayers answered or, at least, beginning to get answers. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd now\u2014even back then\u2014when his buddies call the house, and I get them on the phone, before I hand it over to Ken\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[I say:] \u201cJan, God bless you. Sir, I don\u2019t know what you\u2019re doing in my husband\u2019s life. Keep it up. I know you\u2019re memorizing Scripture. I know you\u2019re doing some new Jerry Bridges Bible study together on the phone. Keep it up! I love it. You\u2019re going in the right direction.\u201d I\u2019m thanking Pete, I\u2019m thanking Chris, and I\u2019m thanking Jan\u2014all these guys, that I used to be jealous of\u2014they\u2019re the <em>best<\/em> because they help my husband be the man that he can be.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And that story occurred\u2014what I want our listeners to hear\u201421 years into your marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And the next time you go out with Pete, and Jan, and Chris, we\u2019ve got a resource for you to take with you\u2014a Bible study for guys called <em>Stepping Up\u2122<\/em>, based on Dennis\u2019s book by that title. It\u2019s a video resource, and it\u2019ll spark some great discussion with you and the guys; okay?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>Great. Thank you, Bob.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>One last story, Joni\u2014and this one\u2019s for you. You battled cancer \/ you went through chemotherapy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn the process of going through that, fell prey to pneumonia. You had a moment, in the midst of that, that was pretty grim. You had your own encounter when God spoke to you. Would you share with our listeners that story? I think that is incredibly powerful.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>Well, as a quadriplegic, I\u2019m susceptible to things like pneumonia. I have extremely limited lung capacity. I had to be in the hospital for nine or ten days. My husband, bless his heart, made a little cot, out of a couple of plastic chairs. He slept by my bedside. Instead of me having to be intubated, Ken got up every night\u2014would cough me\u2014pound on my chest.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne night, I was so exhausted\u2014I had so flattened out, emotionally\u2014I was crying out to God. I had no physical ability. My lungs were gurgling \/ I could hardly breathe\u2014I felt like I was drowning. I just didn\u2019t want to have to get my husband up another time. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember saying: \u201cLord Jesus, I need You. I need to see You tonight. I just need to feel Your touch. I need to feel Your hand on my head. I need You!\u201d I fell into a sleep. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, when I woke up with the gurgling, and needed to be coughed again, Ken came over to my hospital bedside. As he began to lift me up, I looked at him, wide-eyed. I said: \u201cYou\u2019re Him! Oh, my goodness, you\u2019re Him!\u201d Jesus visited me, that night, through my husband. I felt his hand on my forehead, and it was the touch of Jesus. I felt him push on my abdomen, and it was the strength of Jesus. I felt him pound on my back to give me air; and it was Jesus, the Breath of Life. Everything about my husband was Jesus. I said to Ken, \u201cYou\u2019re Him! Jesus showed up and you\u2019re Him!\u201d It was such a beautiful revelation of how God can answer prayer\u2014the prayers that are desperate, and show up best through them. That was a beautiful moment.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, we\u2019ve talked a lot about cancer \/ we\u2019ve talked a lot about quadriplegia. I\u2019m going to confess to you those things are a cinch compared to the daily grind of pain that I deal with. You know, through my PET scans\u2014a couple more years, and maybe I\u2019ll be declared cancer-free. Things are looking hopeful. My quadriplegia\u2014I kind of know that route. But, boy, the daily grind of pain is so hard. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy husband, a couple of weeks ago, did a beautiful thing. Before he saw me head out the door, he could see the look in my eyes that I was going to have a very painful day. He said: \u201cWait a minute. Wait a minute.\u201d He quick ran and got a stick-em, and etched on it a big \u201cC,\u201d and put it over my heart\u2014slapped it right over my heart. He said: \u201cThere you go, Joni. You\u2019ve got courage, and you\u2019re going to rise to that challenge.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think what I love best about my husband is that he can find the infinitesimally small Christ-like characteristics in my life\u2014he can find them, pick them out, and affirm them. He can water them and nurture them with actions such as he did with that stick-em on my chest. He believes that I can be courageous. I don\u2019t want to disappoint my wonderful husband. I want to be courageous, in Christ, for his sake and for the sake of the gospel. That is, honestly, how I get through the toughest days of my pain.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You both are courageous. Recently, I did a little Bible study in Joshua 1. There are three places where courage comes from: God\u2019s mission, being obedient to God\u2019s Word, and, third, practicing His presence. As I\u2019m watching your lives, as a couple, you\u2019re on mission\u2014you\u2019re on task, as a couple. You\u2019re about the glory of God and running the race to finish it well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSecondly, you\u2019ve both been obedient. You\u2019ve kept your covenant. You\u2019re not only still married\u2014you\u2019re lovin\u2019 each other. And, third, you\u2019re practicing the presence of God, whether it be fly fishing or whether it be flat on your back in a hospital room, battling pneumonia. You\u2019re experiencing the presence of God, and you\u2019re bringing a lot of hope to a lot of people. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> May God\u2019s favor be upon this book and you guys, as you go forward.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Joni: <\/strong>Thank you, Dennis.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ken: <\/strong>Thank you, Dennis and Bob.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We hope a lot of our listeners will get a copy of the book you\u2019ve written. It\u2019s called <em>Joni and Ken: An Untold Love Story<\/em>\u201430 years of marriage, where you guys peel back the veneer and show us what real marriage is all about. I appreciate your candor here \/ the transparency and authenticity in what you\u2019ve written here. Again, the title of the book is <em>Joni and Ken: An Untold Love Story.<\/em> You can go online at FamilyLifeToday.com to order a copy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, the website is FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d You can order a copy of the book from us when you call\u2014again, the toll-free number is 1-800-FL-TODAY\u2014or find us online at FamilyLifeToday.com.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhile we\u2019re talking about love stories, we want to say, \u201cCongratulations!\u201d today to William and Doretha Jenkins, who live in Honolulu. Today is their 27<sup>th<\/sup> wedding anniversary. They listen to <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>on KGU. They help support the ministry \/ they\u2019ve attended a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup>. \u201cCongratulations!\u201d to the Jenkins and to any of our other listeners who are celebrating anniversaries today: \u201cHappy anniversary to you!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe think anniversaries are a big deal. We think couples staying together, and keeping their vows, and loving and honoring and cherishing\u2014we think that is all great stuff. That\u2019s what we\u2019re all about, here at FamilyLife. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you listen to this daily radio program\u2014whether it\u2019s on your local Christian station or on our new <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>app that you can find at your app store\u2014however you\u2019re listening, we hope that you\u2019re getting practical biblical help and hope for your marriage and for your family. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we want to thank our Legacy Partners, who help make all of this possible through their generosity\u2014and those of you who contribute, from time to time\u2014\u201cThank you,\u201d as well. In fact, if you\u2019d like to make a donation today or if you\u2019d like to see about becoming a Legacy Partner, go to FamilyLifeToday.com\u2014you can make an online donation\u2014or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY to donate over the phone. Or mail your donation to <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd with that, we\u2019re done for this week. Thanks for being with us. I hope you have a great weekend and hope you and your family can worship together in your local church this weekend. Then, join us back on Monday when we are going to talk about what life was like 40 years ago. We\u2019re going to look back to the very beginning of the ministry of FamilyLife. Dennis and Barbara Rainey will be here to share thoughts from the first year of ministry\u20141976. We\u2019ll hear about what God has done over the last four decades. I hope you can tune in for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We\u2019ll see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2016 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/304096","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=304096"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=304096"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=304096"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=304096"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=304096"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=304096"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=304096"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}