{"id":304030,"date":"2016-06-07T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2016-06-07T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/shaping-boys-into-men\/"},"modified":"2016-06-07T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2016-06-07T15:00:00","slug":"shaping-boys-into-men","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/shaping-boys-into-men\/","title":{"rendered":"Shaping Boys Into Men"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>guest: William Bennett | Series: The Book of Man | What does a boy need from a father? William Bennett, a father of two sons and author of the book, &#8220;The Book of Man,&#8221; reminds listeners that boys are moral and spiritual beings, and if we forget this, we&#8217;ve lost the key to raising and educating them.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>William Bennett, a father of two sons and author of the book, &#8220;The Book of Man,&#8221; reminds listeners that boys are moral and spiritual beings, and if we forget this, we&#8217;ve lost the key to raising and educating them.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2016-06-07.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"23.53M","filesize_raw":"24671688","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2837,2826,2835],"tags":[4277,4276,4698,4096,6017,6004],"podcast_series":[7855],"cwp_profile":[9259],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-304030","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-fathers","category-men","category-raising-boys","tag-fathers","tag-legacy","tag-manhood","tag-mentoring","tag-mentoring-boys","tag-real-men","podcast_series-the-book-of-man","cwp_profile-william-bennett","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/304030\/shaping-boys-into-men","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/304030\/shaping-boys-into-men","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"jtIIp4poQv\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/shaping-boys-into-men\/\">Shaping Boys Into Men<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/shaping-boys-into-men\/embed\/#?secret=jtIIp4poQv\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Shaping Boys Into Men&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"jtIIp4poQv\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2016-06-07.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2016-06-07.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> When the men aren\u2019t up to it, it\u2019s not good for the men; it\u2019s not good for the women, either, because the woman wants that strong arm of man. She <em>wants<\/em> a man she can look across at and up to for some protection and some guidance. Nobody wins when men don\u2019t do their job\u2014nobody wins. The men don\u2019t win, the women don\u2019t win, and the kids sure don\u2019t win.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Tuesday, June 7th. Our host is the President of FamilyLife\u00ae, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. If you\u2019re a man, stepping up and embracing your responsibilities may be much more important than you\u2019ve ever realized. We\u2019ll talk about that today with Bill Bennett. Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Tuesday edition. How well prepared do you think you were to turn boys into men when you first had boys of your own?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>When they handed me my first son, it\u2019s like, \u201cWhere\u2019s the instructions here?\u201d I wasn\u2019t prepared at all. I think it\u2019s a job description for a man to impart his life to his son, and he learns that process over a number of years. No man can ever be fully ready for that responsibility.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You\u2019d had some great modeling with your own father, and that certainly helped. Still, that first time, as you\u2019re trying to do it, guys often don\u2019t know what the model should look like; do they?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> They don\u2019t. It\u2019s why I think, Bob, we need\u2014as men, we need to constantly be poking around in great literature. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s why I\u2019m excited about this book I\u2019ve got in front of me here. It\u2019s called <em>The Book of Man<\/em> by Bill Bennett. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBill is joining us again here on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Bill, welcome back. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Thank you. Did you\u2014may I ask you a question? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Did you have daughters?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes, I did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Is it easier? Does it come more naturally? Did you need the instruction manual as much for the daughters? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve had friends\u2014but I\u2019ve no daughters\u2014say to me, \u201cIt was easier. I kind of knew what to do with my daughters\u2014hold them, talk to them, and love them; but sons, they were a problem because they were all kind of bony, and pokey, and difficult.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Then, they said, \u201cNo. You don\u2019t know girls at 13.\u201d So, I don\u2019t know. I defer. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I would agree with your friend, \u201cNo, you don\u2019t know girls at 13.\u201d (Laughter) Each group had their own challenge. I think there is something unique, though, about the challenge of raising sons because it is a same-sex transfer that we\u2019re making\u2014some kind of man-to-man call where you go, \u201cYou know what? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m the go-to person for this.\u201d There isn\u2019t anywhere you can delegate this. There\u2019s\u2014you can\u2019t delegate it to the Sunday school teacher\u2014although, they can help. You can\u2019t delegate it to a coach. You can\u2019t delegate it to education, the school system. \u201cIt\u2019s my responsibility to be a dad to my sons and to my daughters.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> What you just said\u2014you know the play, <em>A Man for All Seasons,<\/em> Robert Bolt?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Sure.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Thomas More\u2014and son, Roper, says, \u201cYou can\u2019t sign it. You know what it means.\u201d Thomas says, \u201cI know what it means, but I have to see what it says.\u201d He says, \u201cWhy do you care?\u201d \u201cBecause I\u2019m a lawyer; I\u2019m a woodsman. These are the trees, and I will take shelter in the trees.\u201d He said, \u201cWhat you would do is cut down every tree for your sense of justice\u2014right and wrong\u2014I will stick with the law\u201d; okay? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen my father died, even though we weren\u2019t close and all, this was the one picture, in my head, that just came back to me as you were talking\u2014that this tree, which had been protecting me, was gone; and it was bare now\u2014now the wind. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cNow, it\u2019s up to me.\u201d Now, I have to step up. I thought, \u201cStep up and do what?\u201d I wasn\u2019t sure, but maybe that\u2019s why I dove into all this\u2014to find out where those trees are, what those sources are.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes. That was going to be one of my questions for you. Here you worked for the Reagan Administration. You\u2019ve been around a lot of great men. You and your wife Elayne had been married 30 years, and you\u2019ve undoubtedly been out with other couples and other, again, great men who have challenged you. What man had the greatest impact on your life?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Probably, as a professional, Ronald Reagan, because we became, I think I can say, friends. I think I have enough entries in his diary, \u201cDr. Bill Bennett\u201d\u2014again. He enjoyed me. He liked my company. They needed a fall guy, too. You know, when they were having a party at the White House and they had a magician, they had to have somebody that they were going to pull rabbits out of the person\u2019s ear. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, you\u2019re not going to do that to Jim Baker, Ed Meese\u2014\u201cGet Bennett,\u201d you know. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Are you saying they picked on you? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Absolutely, and the President\u2014everybody loves this story. I\u2019ll tell you real quickly. We were in Missouri because I asked him to go to Missouri to visit this great public school system. We were riding in the limo; and he said, \u201cI don\u2019t know if this loud speaker works\u201d\u2014kind of a little loud speaker on the side of the car so he can say, \u201cHello,\u201d to the crowds as he passes by. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe said, \u201cBill, get out in the field and tell me if you can hear this. Can you hear me?\u201d \u201cYes.\u201d \u201cGo another 20 yards. Can you hear me?\u201d \u201cYes.\u201d \u201cAnother 50 yards.\u201d Guess what he does? Drives off! (Laughter) You know, leaves his Secretary of Education in a corn field in the middle of Missouri. Laughs like a hyena\u2014just tells it to the Secret Service. I said, \u201cThis is my visit. I arranged this, and I\u2019m the boss. What\u2019s going on?\u201d I\u2019m standing in a field. What do you do when you\u2019ve been abandoned by the Secret Service and the President? They sent a little car back for me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> He had a lot of fun with you\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes, he did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014but he made an enormous imprint in your life; didn\u2019t he?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> There was a \u201cfather moment\u201d. I was getting in a lot of trouble because I was criticizing teachers\u2019 unions, I was criticizing all sorts of things in education\u2014I was breaking a lot of china. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere was a Cabinet meeting, and there was a big folder on the President\u2019s desk that said \u201cBennett.\u201d I thought, \u201cMan! I\u2019m in trouble with Dad.\u201d The President is irresistibly a father-figure, particularly, if he is a guy like Ronald Reagan. He starts reading the headlines: <em>Bennett Must Go, Bennett a Disaster, Bennett Attacks Teacher Unions<\/em>. He closes it up, and he\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Now, we\u2019re talking at a Cabinet meeting.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> A Cabinet meeting. He looks around the room and says, \u201cWell, I see what Bill Bennett\u2019s doing. What\u2019s wrong with the rest of you?\u201d So, in that moment, this was a father putting an arm around, saying, \u201cYou\u2019re doing fine. Just keep doing it.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI would have walked the plank that day for him. I would have done whatever. He noticed; he paid attention; he said, \u201cWell done, kid.\u201d That\u2019s all I needed.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Every man needs an older man\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014who believes in him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014who\u2019s calling him up. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Did he ever correct you? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes. Yes, he did. I used to talk to him about\u2014whenever I got him, I talked to him about the movies. I\u2019d say, \u201cLet\u2019s talk about the movies.\u201d \u201cNo, I don\u2019t want to talk about the movies.\u201d I\u2019d make him talk about the movies, but he corrected me a couple times. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe\u2019d say, \u201cSlow down, take your time. You\u2019re too impatient on this.\u201d So, yes, he corrected me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Your book is filled with\u2014well, not just readings on the path to manhood, but great biographies, snapshots, stories; and speaking of education, I found one of the more fascinating stories that I really liked in the book about a guy by the name of Jaime Escalante. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> I read the story in the newspaper of this guy, at this inner city Latino high school in LA, \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\twho was getting these remarkable scores on the Advance Placement Calculus. So, I went out to see him. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTo make a long story short, he was this fabulous teacher; and in this impoverished school, Garfield High School, he was number three in the country in terms of number of seniors getting Advance Placement in Calculus. Teaching math was one thing, but it was the teaching of character and of boys\u2014you want a man\/boy story. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI watched his classroom. He was teaching Calculus to a bunch of poor, Hispanic kids. He said, \u201cYou want to get out of the barrio? You want to be somebody? You study Calculus.\u201d This boy stands up and starts to walk out. Escalante says, \u201cWhere are you going?\u201d He says, \u201cThis too hard.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEscalante says, \u201cFine. You go. Where are you going\u2014see your girlfriend?\u201d \u201cYes, see my girlfriend.\u201d \u201cYou should go see your girlfriend, drop Calculus, and then, go to woodworking\u2014learn woodworking.\u201d The kid says, \u201cWhy woodworking?\u201d Escalante says, \u201cSo, when the Anglo-businessman comes through Los Angeles Airport, you can say, \u2018Mister, can I shine your shoes for 50 cents?\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis kid\u2019s back arches. He says, \u201cI don\u2019t want to shine anybody\u2019s shoes for 50 cents.\u201d Escalante says, \u201cThen, sit down, you dope, and study Calculus.\u201d Now, that is a man. You don\u2019t see that a lot anymore. You want to know why boys are confused? This boy was not confused about what Mr. Escalante meant. You know what? He sat down, and he finished the course. That\u2019s a man teaching a boy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know, as you tell that story, I look back on raising my own sons; and I think, \u201cI probably was not tough enough.\u201d I probably was so concerned about wanting to protect the relationship, or make sure that we were good\u2014that I backed down too quickly. I think I may be typical of what\u2019s going on with a lot of dads. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> I think you\u2019re right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Why are we afraid to be tough? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> I think you are right. You know it\u2019s like me and the computer. I got my first laptop. My boys were watching me, just shaking their heads. I was fumbling. They know how to do this stuff. We don\u2019t. I said, \u201cI think I broke it.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey said, \u201cYou can\u2019t break the internet, Dad!\u201d (Laughter) \u201cI think I broke it!\u201d But we think we\u2019ll break them. I remember I spanked Joe when he was little. I\u2019ll never forget. He looked at me with his tear eyes; and he said, \u201cIf you spank me again, I won\u2019t be your friend.\u201d You know, I thought about it. I thought, \u201cI\u2019m not going to spank him because I want to be his friend.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe Marines have something to teach us here. This major down in Quantico said, \u201cYou won\u2019t believe how much these guys can take. You guys\u2014you must have done a pretty good job, or they wouldn\u2019t be here.\u201d Said, \u201cBut they can take a lot more. They\u2019re boys. They\u2019re men.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere\u2019s a story in here about Ernest Shackleton and his expedition to the South Pole\u2014puts an ad up in the London newspaper, \u201cWanted: Man for hazardous journey. Much danger. Low pay. Chances of return unlikely.\u201d 7,000 men apply\u2014chance for honor. Honor. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHow many things, that come at our boys today, from TV, from the culture\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> \u2014give them a chance at honor? That\u2019s why you see these\u2014obviously, I\u2019m partial because I\u2019ve got this guy in the Corps\u2014but you see that commercial for the Marines, \u201cThe Few, the Proud\u201d\u2014they\u2019re onto something. Boys need to live for something that is important, and the garbage that we\u2019re giving them doesn\u2019t give them that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou talk about the fight of civilizations. A young Islamic youth being schooled in radical Islam is given a higher purpose. It\u2019s actually the purposes of the Devil. It is the most wicked thing in the world\u2014it is to seek death and the death of the infidel\u2014but they give themselves to this because it is something large. We don\u2019t offer our boys something large, and that\u2019s what we need to do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn the course of offering them something large, we say, \u201cYou have to make sacrifices.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt is back to that coach thing\u2014this particular horror of the Penn State thing. Sports are a replica of war. I mean, it is. The liberal criticism is right, but there is a point to learning war because we have to do it from time to time. If we can\u2019t entrust our boys to men of honor who will teach them the difference between toughness and callousness, then, we have a problem. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey can take a lot. Yes. I know. I know exactly what you mean\u2014they can take a lot. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Back to that theme of honor\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes, sir.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014there\u2019s a lot of ways a man can achieve that honor. I think it\u2019s really upon us as dads and as older men to, again, reach down to those on those lower steps, those younger men on their way up\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes, sir.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014and call them up to something great. You tell a story about General Robert E. Lee teaching a group of men about manners. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI love the story. It\u2019s not battlefield heroism, again; but it\u2019s the stuff of a man who\u2019s giving his life on behalf of another. I think that is the route of honor; don\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> It is. It absolutely is, and the boys will take these lessons. One thing I learned when I did <em>The Book of Virtues<\/em> is the magic of the phrase, \u201cOnce upon a time.\u201d It still works. It\u2019s what happens after that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWith a guy like\u2014with Lee, who is in this book several times\u2014once on manners, once on prayer\u2014where he talks to his soldiers about the importance of prayer. This is how we raise the next generation. It doesn\u2019t happen automatically; and certainly, we can\u2019t count on the culture. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy favorite way to talk about being a father is to go back to my religion of my youth\u2014I was taught Catholic\u2014learning Latin. We\u2019d learn the Lord\u2019s Prayer in Latin: \u201c<em>Pater noster, qui es in caelis<\/em>, (Our Father who art in Heaven).\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tRemember my Latin teacher\u2014there are two Latin words for father. One is <em>genitor<\/em>, the biological act of father. We do not have to teach them much about that. They know about that. They get that in the movies; they can get that in school. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe other one is <em>pater<\/em>. <em>Pater<\/em> is the one who takes responsibility, the one who shows up, the one who is accountable, the one who is there, the one who takes you home, the one who stands there and answers for himself and, if necessary, for you. It\u2019s that taking up of responsibility\u2014Lee has it in a variety of contexts and talks about it in manners, and prayer, and war, and everything else. That\u2019s the difference. That\u2019s what we\u2019re not teaching the boys. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen I put this book out, <em>The Book of Man<\/em>, the most interesting thing was\u2014I thought some girls or ladies would be offended because they\u2019d say, \u201cWhy did you just cut out half the universe.\u201d My short answer is, \u201cBecause I don\u2019t have the foggiest idea about women.\u201d I couldn\u2019t write <em>The Book of Women<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI mean\u2014men, I know; the others\u2014I don\u2019t know\u201430 years, I\u2019m still learning\u2014the learning curve is still\u2014I\u2019m trying to figure it out. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe guides me, and helps me, and leaves notes for me to help me along, but the women\u2019s reaction to this book is\u2014this is kind of a comment on our time\u2014\u201cYou don\u2019t know the half of it, Mr. Bennett. I tell my daughters, \u2018Don\u2019t lower your standards.\u2019 My daughters say, \u2018We are going to have to if you want us to get married. They\u2019re not out there, Mom. The kind of man you would want me to marry may not be out there anymore.\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, they are out there. I think they are out there, but maybe not in the numbers they ought to be.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Robert E. Lee on a train ride\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes, sir.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014a woman, an elderly woman, walks into the train. Tell them what he did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> He got up.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Immediately, you tell the story of how a dozen other guys got up and said, \u201cOh, here, General Lee, have my seat,\u201d and he says what?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Too late.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> He says to them, \u201cIf there wasn\u2019t a seat for her\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> \u201c\u2014there\u2019s no seat for me.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u201c\u2014there\u2019s no seat for me.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> \u201cToo late\u2014You should have thought of this earlier.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I love your little line at the end. It said that car emptied out pretty quickly\u2014the heat in the car\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> The heat.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014the embarrassment\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> The embarrassment.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014of men not being men. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Compare\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> That\u2019s exactly right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014that to a New York City subway\u2014where, \u201cFirst-come, first-served.\u201d I\u2019ve been on the subway, and I\u2019ve gotten up and offered my seat to a lady. How <em>rare<\/em> is that in the culture? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> How rare it is\u2014you\u2019re absolutely right, and thanks for the reminder. I\u2019m slow to pick up on it; but a young woman I know said, \u201cI think I may have found the man.\u201d I said, \u201cReally?\u201d She said, \u201cHe\u2019s nice. He\u2019s not brilliant. He\u2019s done no great thing. He\u2019s a good guy; but after our meal, he paid for it. He pulled my chair out, and he took the tray with all our stuff and brought it to where it was supposed to go.\u201d She said, \u201cI think I may have found a man.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Wow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> How about that?! She said, \u201cI\u2019d never seen a man do that before.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, I have to tell you as you tell\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> That\u2019s pretty small potatoes\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> But as you tell that story\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> \u2014but it\u2019s a sign. It\u2019s an indicator. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I was interviewing, actually, Dennis\u2019 son and the woman who is now his wife. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was asking them about their courtship. She said, \u201cWhen I first met Samuel\u201d\u2014she said, \u201cHe came over, and he said, \u2018I\u2019d like to ask you out, but I need to tell you at the beginning I\u2019m not interested in pursuing a casual relationship.\u2019 He said, \u2018I want to take this seriously and really pursue this to see if there is something here that would be long-term.\u2019\u201d Her response was, \u201cThis is what a man acts like!\u201d\u2014like it dawned on her, \u201cI\u2019ve dated other guys, but I\u2019ve never dated a man before.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe <em>know<\/em>\u2014we <em>know<\/em> what a man should be; don\u2019t we? It\u2019s locked up inside of us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> We do. A friend of mine told me the other day, and I thought it sounded original to me. He said, \u201cHow do we know that men know what the right thing is?\u201d He said, \u201cBecause there are only 2,000 Seals.\u201d Did you know that? There are only 2,000 Navy Seals. That\u2019s how small our group is, but \u201cEvery Saturday night in bars in America, there are 100,000 guys telling girls that they were Navy Seals.\u201d (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey know! There is something\u2014they <em>know<\/em> what it means. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> They <em>know<\/em>, \u201cHats off to these guys,\u201d\u2014that recognition, and we just need to\u2014because you don\u2019t have to be a Navy Seal; you don\u2019t have to be in uniform. We honor these guys\u2014you can live your life out. One of the things in the book, I got a guy who is a garbage worker in here. I profiled Terry Tucson, the best garbage worker in Georgia. That\u2019s what he says when he calls my radio show\u2014that pride in work. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere is a homeschooling dad, Chris Scott, from Houston. He\u2019s in here. I keep saying, \u201cSix kids.\u201d He keeps calling and says, \u201cSeven.\u201d I mean, every time I\u2019m on the show there is another\u2014\u201cEight.\u201d (Laughter) God bless him! He almost didn\u2019t give me permission to put him in the book\u2014he says, \u201cI\u2019m not doing anything.\u201d I said, \u201cYes, you are. What you do with each of the kids when they hit a birthday\u2026\u201d Takes them out-he has these individual \u201cDad Trips.\u201d That\u2019s it. You don\u2019t have to be scaling [Mount] Olympus. You don\u2019t have to be going to the South Pole.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> So, here\u2019s Bill Bennett, who was given a pretty questionable legacy by his father. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe left your family when you were five years old\u2014showed up occasionally to treat you to this and that, but really wasn\u2019t there to shape your soul, and character, and life the way he should have been as a dad. When it\u2019s all said and done, what do you want the legacy of Bill Bennett to be? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> I guess I\u2019ve answered my own question. Part of this is tied up, Dennis, in my own view of and worry about our country. We need the best we have for the sake of this country. We can\u2019t do it without the men. So, they have to step up. If, in any way, any of this work, <em>Book of Virtues, Book of Man<\/em>, has contributed to people remembering what it is they are supposed to do and they are supposed to be\u2014couldn\u2019t make me happier. That\u2019d be just fine. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn the meantime, I know\u2014thanks mostly to Mrs. Bennett\u2019s work\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\twe\u2019ve raised two good boys. She has a wonderful expression about raising sons. She said, \u201cRaise sons to be the kind of man you would want to marry.\u201d That\u2019s how she\u2019s done it. I said, \u201cWhat\u2019s wrong with the guy you did marry?\u201d She said\u2014we\u2019re smart-alecks at our house. (Laughter) She said, \u201cYou can always improve the species.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Would you like the list?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, I\u2019ll tell you, you can tell Mrs. Bennett for us that we think a lot of us have room for improvement. But I think what you\u2019ve done is to help a lot of men by compiling <em>The Book of Man<\/em>. In fact, I just wish my grandson was a little older so that I could read some of the stories in this book to him, and I have to wait a few more years for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf your grandson or your son is old enough to have some stories read to him, go to FamilyLifeToday.com, order a copy of <em>The Book of Man <\/em>by Dr. Bill Bennett. Again the website is FamilyLifeToday.com.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOr you can order by phone. Call 1-800-FLToday. 1-800-358-6329. That\u2019s 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in Family, \u201cL\u201d as in Life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor those of you who have not been through the Stepping Up\u00ae video series or the Stepping Up video event, Dr. Bill Bennett is a part of that series. He\u2019s one of the contributors along with Voddie Baucham and Crawford Loritts and Dennis Rainey and Robert Lewis and Tony Dungy and Matt Chandler and I could go on with the list of guys who are contributors to the Stepping Up video event.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are hoping that this summer there might be some men\u2019s groups who would look at a special summertime event where you could get guys together and go through some of the sessions from the video event that we\u2019ve created. In fact, we will send you the video event kit free-that includes the DVDs, that includes a workbook, \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tit includes the hard-back book by Dennis Rainey-we\u2019ll send that to you free if you will order at least ten manuals and plan to take ten guys through the video event.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo go to our website at FamilyLifeToday.com all the details are available there on how you can get the video event kit with the DVDs in it for free. Again the website is FamilyLifeToday.com or if you have any questions call 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in Family, \u201cL\u201d as in Life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow if you are listening to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> right now on KNWC in South Dakota and if you are celebrating your 20th wedding anniversary today then I\u2019m guessing you are Mike and Kim McCart. We want to say congratulations to the McCarts on their wedding anniversary. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey got married on this day back in 1996. They have not only attended the Weekend To Remember\u00ae marriage getaway but they have hosted an Art of Marriage\u00ae small group.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo I\u2019m thinking maybe we\u2019ve had a little bit of impact on their 20 years of marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what we hope. We exist as a ministry to provide practical biblical help and hope for marriages and families. Our hope is that more couples like the McCarts will celebrate more anniversaries because of how God uses this ministry in their lives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo congratulations to the McCarts and thank you to those of you who partner with us here in this ministry and make the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> possible. We\u2019re listener supported. Your donations help us do all that we do here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf it\u2019s been a while since you\u2019ve made a donation, how about today? Go to FamilyLifeToday.com, make an online donation. Or call 1-800-FLToday you can donate over the phone. Or if you\u2019d prefer to mail your donation to us our mailing address is: <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> at Box 7111,\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLittle Rock, Arkansas, our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow tomorrow we want to talk about the cultural confusion over masculinity and femininity and what we can do as we try to raise boys to understand manhood in this culture. Our guest again will be Dr. Bill Bennett, hope you can be back with us as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\"><u>donating today<\/u><\/a> to help defray the costs? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 2016 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["23.53M"],"filesize_raw":["24671688"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-304030.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-304030.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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Bennett, a father of two sons and author of the book, \"The Book of Man,\" reminds listeners that boys are moral and spiritual beings, and if we forget this, we've lost the key to raising and educating them.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2016-06-07.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> When the men aren\u2019t up to it, it\u2019s not good for the men; it\u2019s not good for the women, either, because the woman wants that strong arm of man. She <em>wants<\/em> a man she can look across at and up to for some protection and some guidance. Nobody wins when men don\u2019t do their job\u2014nobody wins. The men don\u2019t win, the women don\u2019t win, and the kids sure don\u2019t win.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Tuesday, June 7th. Our host is the President of FamilyLife\u00ae, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. If you\u2019re a man, stepping up and embracing your responsibilities may be much more important than you\u2019ve ever realized. We\u2019ll talk about that today with Bill Bennett. Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Tuesday edition. How well prepared do you think you were to turn boys into men when you first had boys of your own?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>When they handed me my first son, it\u2019s like, \u201cWhere\u2019s the instructions here?\u201d I wasn\u2019t prepared at all. I think it\u2019s a job description for a man to impart his life to his son, and he learns that process over a number of years. No man can ever be fully ready for that responsibility.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You\u2019d had some great modeling with your own father, and that certainly helped. Still, that first time, as you\u2019re trying to do it, guys often don\u2019t know what the model should look like; do they?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> They don\u2019t. It\u2019s why I think, Bob, we need\u2014as men, we need to constantly be poking around in great literature. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s why I\u2019m excited about this book I\u2019ve got in front of me here. It\u2019s called <em>The Book of Man<\/em> by Bill Bennett. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBill is joining us again here on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Bill, welcome back. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Thank you. Did you\u2014may I ask you a question? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Did you have daughters?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes, I did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Is it easier? Does it come more naturally? Did you need the instruction manual as much for the daughters? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve had friends\u2014but I\u2019ve no daughters\u2014say to me, \u201cIt was easier. I kind of knew what to do with my daughters\u2014hold them, talk to them, and love them; but sons, they were a problem because they were all kind of bony, and pokey, and difficult.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Then, they said, \u201cNo. You don\u2019t know girls at 13.\u201d So, I don\u2019t know. I defer. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I would agree with your friend, \u201cNo, you don\u2019t know girls at 13.\u201d (Laughter) Each group had their own challenge. I think there is something unique, though, about the challenge of raising sons because it is a same-sex transfer that we\u2019re making\u2014some kind of man-to-man call where you go, \u201cYou know what? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m the go-to person for this.\u201d There isn\u2019t anywhere you can delegate this. There\u2019s\u2014you can\u2019t delegate it to the Sunday school teacher\u2014although, they can help. You can\u2019t delegate it to a coach. You can\u2019t delegate it to education, the school system. \u201cIt\u2019s my responsibility to be a dad to my sons and to my daughters.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> What you just said\u2014you know the play, <em>A Man for All Seasons,<\/em> Robert Bolt?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Sure.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Thomas More\u2014and son, Roper, says, \u201cYou can\u2019t sign it. You know what it means.\u201d Thomas says, \u201cI know what it means, but I have to see what it says.\u201d He says, \u201cWhy do you care?\u201d \u201cBecause I\u2019m a lawyer; I\u2019m a woodsman. These are the trees, and I will take shelter in the trees.\u201d He said, \u201cWhat you would do is cut down every tree for your sense of justice\u2014right and wrong\u2014I will stick with the law\u201d; okay? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen my father died, even though we weren\u2019t close and all, this was the one picture, in my head, that just came back to me as you were talking\u2014that this tree, which had been protecting me, was gone; and it was bare now\u2014now the wind. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cNow, it\u2019s up to me.\u201d Now, I have to step up. I thought, \u201cStep up and do what?\u201d I wasn\u2019t sure, but maybe that\u2019s why I dove into all this\u2014to find out where those trees are, what those sources are.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes. That was going to be one of my questions for you. Here you worked for the Reagan Administration. You\u2019ve been around a lot of great men. You and your wife Elayne had been married 30 years, and you\u2019ve undoubtedly been out with other couples and other, again, great men who have challenged you. What man had the greatest impact on your life?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Probably, as a professional, Ronald Reagan, because we became, I think I can say, friends. I think I have enough entries in his diary, \u201cDr. Bill Bennett\u201d\u2014again. He enjoyed me. He liked my company. They needed a fall guy, too. You know, when they were having a party at the White House and they had a magician, they had to have somebody that they were going to pull rabbits out of the person\u2019s ear. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, you\u2019re not going to do that to Jim Baker, Ed Meese\u2014\u201cGet Bennett,\u201d you know. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Are you saying they picked on you? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Absolutely, and the President\u2014everybody loves this story. I\u2019ll tell you real quickly. We were in Missouri because I asked him to go to Missouri to visit this great public school system. We were riding in the limo; and he said, \u201cI don\u2019t know if this loud speaker works\u201d\u2014kind of a little loud speaker on the side of the car so he can say, \u201cHello,\u201d to the crowds as he passes by. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe said, \u201cBill, get out in the field and tell me if you can hear this. Can you hear me?\u201d \u201cYes.\u201d \u201cGo another 20 yards. Can you hear me?\u201d \u201cYes.\u201d \u201cAnother 50 yards.\u201d Guess what he does? Drives off! (Laughter) You know, leaves his Secretary of Education in a corn field in the middle of Missouri. Laughs like a hyena\u2014just tells it to the Secret Service. I said, \u201cThis is my visit. I arranged this, and I\u2019m the boss. What\u2019s going on?\u201d I\u2019m standing in a field. What do you do when you\u2019ve been abandoned by the Secret Service and the President? They sent a little car back for me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> He had a lot of fun with you\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes, he did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014but he made an enormous imprint in your life; didn\u2019t he?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> There was a \u201cfather moment\u201d. I was getting in a lot of trouble because I was criticizing teachers\u2019 unions, I was criticizing all sorts of things in education\u2014I was breaking a lot of china. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere was a Cabinet meeting, and there was a big folder on the President\u2019s desk that said \u201cBennett.\u201d I thought, \u201cMan! I\u2019m in trouble with Dad.\u201d The President is irresistibly a father-figure, particularly, if he is a guy like Ronald Reagan. He starts reading the headlines: <em>Bennett Must Go, Bennett a Disaster, Bennett Attacks Teacher Unions<\/em>. He closes it up, and he\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Now, we\u2019re talking at a Cabinet meeting.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> A Cabinet meeting. He looks around the room and says, \u201cWell, I see what Bill Bennett\u2019s doing. What\u2019s wrong with the rest of you?\u201d So, in that moment, this was a father putting an arm around, saying, \u201cYou\u2019re doing fine. Just keep doing it.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI would have walked the plank that day for him. I would have done whatever. He noticed; he paid attention; he said, \u201cWell done, kid.\u201d That\u2019s all I needed.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Every man needs an older man\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014who believes in him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014who\u2019s calling him up. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Did he ever correct you? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes. Yes, he did. I used to talk to him about\u2014whenever I got him, I talked to him about the movies. I\u2019d say, \u201cLet\u2019s talk about the movies.\u201d \u201cNo, I don\u2019t want to talk about the movies.\u201d I\u2019d make him talk about the movies, but he corrected me a couple times. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe\u2019d say, \u201cSlow down, take your time. You\u2019re too impatient on this.\u201d So, yes, he corrected me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Your book is filled with\u2014well, not just readings on the path to manhood, but great biographies, snapshots, stories; and speaking of education, I found one of the more fascinating stories that I really liked in the book about a guy by the name of Jaime Escalante. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> I read the story in the newspaper of this guy, at this inner city Latino high school in LA, \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\twho was getting these remarkable scores on the Advance Placement Calculus. So, I went out to see him. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTo make a long story short, he was this fabulous teacher; and in this impoverished school, Garfield High School, he was number three in the country in terms of number of seniors getting Advance Placement in Calculus. Teaching math was one thing, but it was the teaching of character and of boys\u2014you want a man\/boy story. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI watched his classroom. He was teaching Calculus to a bunch of poor, Hispanic kids. He said, \u201cYou want to get out of the barrio? You want to be somebody? You study Calculus.\u201d This boy stands up and starts to walk out. Escalante says, \u201cWhere are you going?\u201d He says, \u201cThis too hard.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEscalante says, \u201cFine. You go. Where are you going\u2014see your girlfriend?\u201d \u201cYes, see my girlfriend.\u201d \u201cYou should go see your girlfriend, drop Calculus, and then, go to woodworking\u2014learn woodworking.\u201d The kid says, \u201cWhy woodworking?\u201d Escalante says, \u201cSo, when the Anglo-businessman comes through Los Angeles Airport, you can say, \u2018Mister, can I shine your shoes for 50 cents?\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis kid\u2019s back arches. He says, \u201cI don\u2019t want to shine anybody\u2019s shoes for 50 cents.\u201d Escalante says, \u201cThen, sit down, you dope, and study Calculus.\u201d Now, that is a man. You don\u2019t see that a lot anymore. You want to know why boys are confused? This boy was not confused about what Mr. Escalante meant. You know what? He sat down, and he finished the course. That\u2019s a man teaching a boy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know, as you tell that story, I look back on raising my own sons; and I think, \u201cI probably was not tough enough.\u201d I probably was so concerned about wanting to protect the relationship, or make sure that we were good\u2014that I backed down too quickly. I think I may be typical of what\u2019s going on with a lot of dads. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> I think you\u2019re right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Why are we afraid to be tough? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> I think you are right. You know it\u2019s like me and the computer. I got my first laptop. My boys were watching me, just shaking their heads. I was fumbling. They know how to do this stuff. We don\u2019t. I said, \u201cI think I broke it.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey said, \u201cYou can\u2019t break the internet, Dad!\u201d (Laughter) \u201cI think I broke it!\u201d But we think we\u2019ll break them. I remember I spanked Joe when he was little. I\u2019ll never forget. He looked at me with his tear eyes; and he said, \u201cIf you spank me again, I won\u2019t be your friend.\u201d You know, I thought about it. I thought, \u201cI\u2019m not going to spank him because I want to be his friend.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe Marines have something to teach us here. This major down in Quantico said, \u201cYou won\u2019t believe how much these guys can take. You guys\u2014you must have done a pretty good job, or they wouldn\u2019t be here.\u201d Said, \u201cBut they can take a lot more. They\u2019re boys. They\u2019re men.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere\u2019s a story in here about Ernest Shackleton and his expedition to the South Pole\u2014puts an ad up in the London newspaper, \u201cWanted: Man for hazardous journey. Much danger. Low pay. Chances of return unlikely.\u201d 7,000 men apply\u2014chance for honor. Honor. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHow many things, that come at our boys today, from TV, from the culture\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> \u2014give them a chance at honor? That\u2019s why you see these\u2014obviously, I\u2019m partial because I\u2019ve got this guy in the Corps\u2014but you see that commercial for the Marines, \u201cThe Few, the Proud\u201d\u2014they\u2019re onto something. Boys need to live for something that is important, and the garbage that we\u2019re giving them doesn\u2019t give them that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou talk about the fight of civilizations. A young Islamic youth being schooled in radical Islam is given a higher purpose. It\u2019s actually the purposes of the Devil. It is the most wicked thing in the world\u2014it is to seek death and the death of the infidel\u2014but they give themselves to this because it is something large. We don\u2019t offer our boys something large, and that\u2019s what we need to do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn the course of offering them something large, we say, \u201cYou have to make sacrifices.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt is back to that coach thing\u2014this particular horror of the Penn State thing. Sports are a replica of war. I mean, it is. The liberal criticism is right, but there is a point to learning war because we have to do it from time to time. If we can\u2019t entrust our boys to men of honor who will teach them the difference between toughness and callousness, then, we have a problem. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey can take a lot. Yes. I know. I know exactly what you mean\u2014they can take a lot. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Back to that theme of honor\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes, sir.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014there\u2019s a lot of ways a man can achieve that honor. I think it\u2019s really upon us as dads and as older men to, again, reach down to those on those lower steps, those younger men on their way up\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes, sir.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014and call them up to something great. You tell a story about General Robert E. Lee teaching a group of men about manners. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI love the story. It\u2019s not battlefield heroism, again; but it\u2019s the stuff of a man who\u2019s giving his life on behalf of another. I think that is the route of honor; don\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> It is. It absolutely is, and the boys will take these lessons. One thing I learned when I did <em>The Book of Virtues<\/em> is the magic of the phrase, \u201cOnce upon a time.\u201d It still works. It\u2019s what happens after that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWith a guy like\u2014with Lee, who is in this book several times\u2014once on manners, once on prayer\u2014where he talks to his soldiers about the importance of prayer. This is how we raise the next generation. It doesn\u2019t happen automatically; and certainly, we can\u2019t count on the culture. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy favorite way to talk about being a father is to go back to my religion of my youth\u2014I was taught Catholic\u2014learning Latin. We\u2019d learn the Lord\u2019s Prayer in Latin: \u201c<em>Pater noster, qui es in caelis<\/em>, (Our Father who art in Heaven).\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tRemember my Latin teacher\u2014there are two Latin words for father. One is <em>genitor<\/em>, the biological act of father. We do not have to teach them much about that. They know about that. They get that in the movies; they can get that in school. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe other one is <em>pater<\/em>. <em>Pater<\/em> is the one who takes responsibility, the one who shows up, the one who is accountable, the one who is there, the one who takes you home, the one who stands there and answers for himself and, if necessary, for you. It\u2019s that taking up of responsibility\u2014Lee has it in a variety of contexts and talks about it in manners, and prayer, and war, and everything else. That\u2019s the difference. That\u2019s what we\u2019re not teaching the boys. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen I put this book out, <em>The Book of Man<\/em>, the most interesting thing was\u2014I thought some girls or ladies would be offended because they\u2019d say, \u201cWhy did you just cut out half the universe.\u201d My short answer is, \u201cBecause I don\u2019t have the foggiest idea about women.\u201d I couldn\u2019t write <em>The Book of Women<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI mean\u2014men, I know; the others\u2014I don\u2019t know\u201430 years, I\u2019m still learning\u2014the learning curve is still\u2014I\u2019m trying to figure it out. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe guides me, and helps me, and leaves notes for me to help me along, but the women\u2019s reaction to this book is\u2014this is kind of a comment on our time\u2014\u201cYou don\u2019t know the half of it, Mr. Bennett. I tell my daughters, \u2018Don\u2019t lower your standards.\u2019 My daughters say, \u2018We are going to have to if you want us to get married. They\u2019re not out there, Mom. The kind of man you would want me to marry may not be out there anymore.\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, they are out there. I think they are out there, but maybe not in the numbers they ought to be.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Robert E. Lee on a train ride\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Yes, sir.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014a woman, an elderly woman, walks into the train. Tell them what he did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> He got up.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Immediately, you tell the story of how a dozen other guys got up and said, \u201cOh, here, General Lee, have my seat,\u201d and he says what?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> Too late.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> He says to them, \u201cIf there wasn\u2019t a seat for her\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> \u201c\u2014there\u2019s no seat for me.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u201c\u2014there\u2019s no seat for me.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> \u201cToo late\u2014You should have thought of this earlier.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I love your little line at the end. It said that car emptied out pretty quickly\u2014the heat in the car\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> The heat.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014the embarrassment\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> The embarrassment.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014of men not being men. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Compare\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> That\u2019s exactly right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014that to a New York City subway\u2014where, \u201cFirst-come, first-served.\u201d I\u2019ve been on the subway, and I\u2019ve gotten up and offered my seat to a lady. How <em>rare<\/em> is that in the culture? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> How rare it is\u2014you\u2019re absolutely right, and thanks for the reminder. I\u2019m slow to pick up on it; but a young woman I know said, \u201cI think I may have found the man.\u201d I said, \u201cReally?\u201d She said, \u201cHe\u2019s nice. He\u2019s not brilliant. He\u2019s done no great thing. He\u2019s a good guy; but after our meal, he paid for it. He pulled my chair out, and he took the tray with all our stuff and brought it to where it was supposed to go.\u201d She said, \u201cI think I may have found a man.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Wow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> How about that?! She said, \u201cI\u2019d never seen a man do that before.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, I have to tell you as you tell\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> That\u2019s pretty small potatoes\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> But as you tell that story\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> \u2014but it\u2019s a sign. It\u2019s an indicator. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I was interviewing, actually, Dennis\u2019 son and the woman who is now his wife. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was asking them about their courtship. She said, \u201cWhen I first met Samuel\u201d\u2014she said, \u201cHe came over, and he said, \u2018I\u2019d like to ask you out, but I need to tell you at the beginning I\u2019m not interested in pursuing a casual relationship.\u2019 He said, \u2018I want to take this seriously and really pursue this to see if there is something here that would be long-term.\u2019\u201d Her response was, \u201cThis is what a man acts like!\u201d\u2014like it dawned on her, \u201cI\u2019ve dated other guys, but I\u2019ve never dated a man before.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe <em>know<\/em>\u2014we <em>know<\/em> what a man should be; don\u2019t we? It\u2019s locked up inside of us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> We do. A friend of mine told me the other day, and I thought it sounded original to me. He said, \u201cHow do we know that men know what the right thing is?\u201d He said, \u201cBecause there are only 2,000 Seals.\u201d Did you know that? There are only 2,000 Navy Seals. That\u2019s how small our group is, but \u201cEvery Saturday night in bars in America, there are 100,000 guys telling girls that they were Navy Seals.\u201d (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey know! There is something\u2014they <em>know<\/em> what it means. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> They <em>know<\/em>, \u201cHats off to these guys,\u201d\u2014that recognition, and we just need to\u2014because you don\u2019t have to be a Navy Seal; you don\u2019t have to be in uniform. We honor these guys\u2014you can live your life out. One of the things in the book, I got a guy who is a garbage worker in here. I profiled Terry Tucson, the best garbage worker in Georgia. That\u2019s what he says when he calls my radio show\u2014that pride in work. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere is a homeschooling dad, Chris Scott, from Houston. He\u2019s in here. I keep saying, \u201cSix kids.\u201d He keeps calling and says, \u201cSeven.\u201d I mean, every time I\u2019m on the show there is another\u2014\u201cEight.\u201d (Laughter) God bless him! He almost didn\u2019t give me permission to put him in the book\u2014he says, \u201cI\u2019m not doing anything.\u201d I said, \u201cYes, you are. What you do with each of the kids when they hit a birthday\u2026\u201d Takes them out-he has these individual \u201cDad Trips.\u201d That\u2019s it. You don\u2019t have to be scaling [Mount] Olympus. You don\u2019t have to be going to the South Pole.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> So, here\u2019s Bill Bennett, who was given a pretty questionable legacy by his father. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe left your family when you were five years old\u2014showed up occasionally to treat you to this and that, but really wasn\u2019t there to shape your soul, and character, and life the way he should have been as a dad. When it\u2019s all said and done, what do you want the legacy of Bill Bennett to be? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bill:<\/strong> I guess I\u2019ve answered my own question. Part of this is tied up, Dennis, in my own view of and worry about our country. We need the best we have for the sake of this country. We can\u2019t do it without the men. So, they have to step up. If, in any way, any of this work, <em>Book of Virtues, Book of Man<\/em>, has contributed to people remembering what it is they are supposed to do and they are supposed to be\u2014couldn\u2019t make me happier. That\u2019d be just fine. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn the meantime, I know\u2014thanks mostly to Mrs. Bennett\u2019s work\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\twe\u2019ve raised two good boys. She has a wonderful expression about raising sons. She said, \u201cRaise sons to be the kind of man you would want to marry.\u201d That\u2019s how she\u2019s done it. I said, \u201cWhat\u2019s wrong with the guy you did marry?\u201d She said\u2014we\u2019re smart-alecks at our house. (Laughter) She said, \u201cYou can always improve the species.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Would you like the list?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, I\u2019ll tell you, you can tell Mrs. Bennett for us that we think a lot of us have room for improvement. But I think what you\u2019ve done is to help a lot of men by compiling <em>The Book of Man<\/em>. In fact, I just wish my grandson was a little older so that I could read some of the stories in this book to him, and I have to wait a few more years for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf your grandson or your son is old enough to have some stories read to him, go to FamilyLifeToday.com, order a copy of <em>The Book of Man <\/em>by Dr. Bill Bennett. Again the website is FamilyLifeToday.com.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOr you can order by phone. Call 1-800-FLToday. 1-800-358-6329. That\u2019s 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in Family, \u201cL\u201d as in Life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor those of you who have not been through the Stepping Up\u00ae video series or the Stepping Up video event, Dr. Bill Bennett is a part of that series. He\u2019s one of the contributors along with Voddie Baucham and Crawford Loritts and Dennis Rainey and Robert Lewis and Tony Dungy and Matt Chandler and I could go on with the list of guys who are contributors to the Stepping Up video event.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are hoping that this summer there might be some men\u2019s groups who would look at a special summertime event where you could get guys together and go through some of the sessions from the video event that we\u2019ve created. In fact, we will send you the video event kit free-that includes the DVDs, that includes a workbook, \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tit includes the hard-back book by Dennis Rainey-we\u2019ll send that to you free if you will order at least ten manuals and plan to take ten guys through the video event.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo go to our website at FamilyLifeToday.com all the details are available there on how you can get the video event kit with the DVDs in it for free. Again the website is FamilyLifeToday.com or if you have any questions call 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in Family, \u201cL\u201d as in Life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow if you are listening to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> right now on KNWC in South Dakota and if you are celebrating your 20th wedding anniversary today then I\u2019m guessing you are Mike and Kim McCart. We want to say congratulations to the McCarts on their wedding anniversary. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey got married on this day back in 1996. They have not only attended the Weekend To Remember\u00ae marriage getaway but they have hosted an Art of Marriage\u00ae small group.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo I\u2019m thinking maybe we\u2019ve had a little bit of impact on their 20 years of marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what we hope. We exist as a ministry to provide practical biblical help and hope for marriages and families. Our hope is that more couples like the McCarts will celebrate more anniversaries because of how God uses this ministry in their lives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo congratulations to the McCarts and thank you to those of you who partner with us here in this ministry and make the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> possible. We\u2019re listener supported. Your donations help us do all that we do here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf it\u2019s been a while since you\u2019ve made a donation, how about today? Go to FamilyLifeToday.com, make an online donation. Or call 1-800-FLToday you can donate over the phone. Or if you\u2019d prefer to mail your donation to us our mailing address is: <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> at Box 7111,\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLittle Rock, Arkansas, our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow tomorrow we want to talk about the cultural confusion over masculinity and femininity and what we can do as we try to raise boys to understand manhood in this culture. Our guest again will be Dr. Bill Bennett, hope you can be back with us as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\"><u>donating today<\/u><\/a> to help defray the costs? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 2016 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/304030","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=304030"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=304030"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=304030"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=304030"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=304030"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=304030"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=304030"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}