{"id":303744,"date":"2015-11-18T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2015-11-18T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/sharing-the-love\/"},"modified":"2015-11-18T12:00:00","modified_gmt":"2015-11-18T17:00:00","slug":"sharing-the-love","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/sharing-the-love\/","title":{"rendered":"Sharing the Love"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Wanted: Women who are\u00a0willing to listen, love, and mentor younger women. No experience required. Barbara Neumann and Dr. Sue Edwards, professors at Dallas Theological Seminary, tell how they came to faith through the friendship and influence of older women. Barbara and Sue encourage women to forget everything they thought they knew about mentoring in order to minister to a younger generation.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Barbara Neumann and Dr. Sue Edwards encourage women to forget everything they thought they knew about mentoring in order to minister to a younger generation.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-11-18.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"23.76M","filesize_raw":"24909257","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2821,2093],"tags":[4445,4446,4444,4443],"podcast_series":[7229],"cwp_profile":[8841,8840],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-303744","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-reaching-out","category-women","tag-not-a-program","tag-organic","tag-relational","tag-titus-2-principles","podcast_series-organic-mentoring","cwp_profile-barbara-neumann","cwp_profile-sue-edwards","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/303744\/sharing-the-love","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/303744\/sharing-the-love","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"a1dBUM9GbA\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/sharing-the-love\/\">Sharing the Love<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/sharing-the-love\/embed\/#?secret=a1dBUM9GbA\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Sharing the Love&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"a1dBUM9GbA\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-11-18.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-11-18.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>The book of Titus says that older men are to teach younger men and older women are to teach younger women.Author Sue Edwards says that\u2019s something that we need to take seriously. Particularly, she says, older women need to be intentional about that assignment. At the same time, they don\u2019t need to start a mentoring program.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>We don\u2019t sign on for any particular program\u2014we don\u2019t sign on: \u201cWe\u2019re going to meet them this many times.\u201d It\u2019s all pretty much driven by the needs in the life of that younger person who needs a guide. To help them and to be part of that process is one of the most <em>enriching<\/em> experiences.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>for Wednesday, November 18<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. How can an older woman fulfill God\u2019s assignment to her to teach younger women and do that effectively? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ll explore that subject today. Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em> Thanks for joining us. You just used a word, when we were talking before we stepped in here, that I just want to find out if it is a real word. Maybe our guest can help us on this. You used the word, \u201cmentee.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow I\u2019ve seen Mentos. Those are the things\u2014the mints you buy at the store. You know what I\u2019m talking about?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And I know what a mentor is, but I just don\u2019t know if mentee is a legitimate word.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>We have a couple of doctors with us, here in the studio, from Dallas Theological Seminary, Dr. Barbara Neumann and Dr. Sue Edwards. We\u2019ll just ask you ladies. First of all, welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Thank you so much.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> Thank you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>So is mentee\u2014is that in the dictionary now? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>I\u2019m assuming it is\u2014I haven\u2019t <em>looked<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYes, we use it all the time. It\u2019s terminology that helps us because we need terminology to talk about this topic.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>A person being mentored\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>\u2014is a mentee.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014is a mentee. It\u2019s not a prot\u00e9g\u00e9. Somebody corrected me one time and said, \u201cYou have mentors and prot\u00e9g\u00e9s.\u201d They said, \u201cMentee is not a word.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Well, if you would like to call it a prot\u00e9g\u00e9, we\u2019re going to talk about why a lot of that terminology is not even necessary and why we actually need to drop a lot of it anyway. How about that?!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Well I see our chief engineer is googling the word, even as we speak right now. We will have an authoritative answer\u2014[Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014from Wikipedia. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I actually thought mentee was one of those mammals that crawls up on the beach. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That would be a manatee\u2014that\u2019s what you were thinking about. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Manatee.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Let me just introduce our guests today. Dr. Edwards is the Associate Professor of Educational Ministries in Leadership at Dallas Theological Seminary. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe has written five books. Dr. Neumann is also a graduate of Dallas Seminary and an Adjunct Professor in Educational Ministries in Leadership, as well, in the Houston branch of Dallas Theological Seminary.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>We have to say, at this point, is growing really fast\u2014over 300 students there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTogether, you have collaborated to write a book that I really enjoyed\u2014<em>Organic Mentoring: A Mentor\u2019s Guide to Relationships with Next Generation Women.<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Yes<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You both came to faith in Christ in your 20s. Women\/older women were influential in your life. Sue, explain how that happened and how God used mentors in your life, as a younger woman.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>I came out of a dysfunctional home \/ a non-Christian home. My mother was an angry, bitter woman, trying to make the best of life as she knew it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was a <em>mess<\/em> by the time I reached college. I graduated from college still wandering, trying to figure out: \u201cWhat in the world is life about?\u201d Married\u2014actually, my husband was a back-slidden Baptist because he married me, a pagan\u2014not supposed to do that\u2014but God was overseeing it. Thank You, Lord! We moved to Dallas for his first engineering job\u2014had a couple of lovely little daughters that I <em>adored<\/em>. I <em>adored<\/em> my husband, but I was a mess trying to be a mom and trying to figure out life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA neighbor down the street invited me to a women\u2019s Bible study. There, I found the Lord and I found mentors. Very organically\u2014this was nothing programmed. For 15 years, those women walked alongside me as dear friends. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey trained me and they taught me to lead small groups, and write Bible curriculum, and ultimately to teach the Bible. I ended up going to DTS to be a better Bible teacher in what was a parachurch women\u2019s Bible study, which was very prominent at that time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You mentioned that, not only did they introduce you to the Redeemer, they also were used by God to bring a lot of healing in your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You keep using the word, \u201cmess.\u201d What was the mess, in essence?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Serious depression and just had no idea I was self-absorbed. I had grown up an only child. My mother was extremely critical. She thought every\u2014wanted to be sure nobody was prideful\u2014and she made pretty sure I wasn\u2019t. Her critical spirit \/ constant negativity ended up causing me to\u2014just a loss of personhood. I fell into a deep depression. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I want to point something else out, too, because you just kind of went past this. Here you were\u2014a married mother of two, living in a neighborhood\u2014and somebody said, \u201cWould you be interested in going to the woman\u2019s Bible study?\u201d We kind of think, \u201cThe lady down the street, who doesn\u2019t go to church, she\u2019s not going to be interested in going to the ladies Bible study,\u201d and \u201cI I invite her, she\u2019s probably going to think I\u2019m weird.\u201d So we don\u2019t invite folks like that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>We don\u2019t do that enough. People are around us, all the time, who are desperate for what life is about. A lot of times, we are hesitant. Now, this is back in the early 70s. So, maybe, they weren\u2019t quite as hesitant as they are now; but yes, she did. We were friends. Oh my goodness, what a difference it made.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Just to underscore what Bob was talking about there\u2014I seldom get on a plane and sit next to a stranger who doesn\u2019t finally ask me, \u201cWhat do you do?\u201d When I tell them I work for the number one Homebuilder in the world\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014the God who builds all marriages and families\u2014they get off into their own drama. Everybody\u2019s got a story \/ everyone has needs. To your point, I think a lot of folks\u2014I don\u2019t know if it\u2019s over 50 percent\u2014but I think they\u2019re hopeless.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Absolutely.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>They don\u2019t know how to do this thing called life. They\u2019re ready to talk about their relationships. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAlright; Barbara, let\u2019s go to how you met Christ and how God used women in your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> I have a remarkably similar story to Sue\u2019s\u2014raised in a non-believing, alcoholic home. My dad was an alcoholic; and my mom was just a dysfunctional person, really not able to put together a meaningful life at all. When I left that home, when I was 18 years old, I essentially felt like I was a ship adrift in the ocean. I didn\u2019t have direction\u2014nobody had ever given me any help on how to live life\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014not a believer. Met my husband \/ we married. Both of us basically were ships that were drifting without a lot of direction. We came to Christ the same night. Someone came and just gave us a very simple explanation of the gospel. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Came to your home?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> Came to my home. It was a man who was at the church that we were sort of attending at the time. I think he realized that there was something very important missing. He came just to explain to us new life in Christ. We both knew that was the missing piece. We both knew that what we needed to do was to receive Christ, which we did. The same time, we knelt down together, received Christ. A wonderful start\u2014but I still didn\u2019t know how to live life, as a believing woman. I was still confused about a whole lot of things, and I didn\u2019t know how to make this new life work. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI did end up in a women\u2019s Bible study as well; but the mentoring that took place for me, at that time, was mentoring from a distance. The women, who would stand up and teach\u2014I learned a lot and I absorbed a lot from them\u2014but again, from a distance. I <em>longed<\/em> for someone to listen to what was going on in my life and help me figure out how to make godly decisions, how to move forward with God, how to love other people. I didn\u2019t learn these things at home. This is what I longed for and didn\u2019t find that for many years. There were just not a lot of women who were available enough or confident enough to mentor.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I think both men and women today are looking for models as never before.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> As never before.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>This is what we\u2019ve found when we have looked into the mentoring situation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe have a generation of young people who are <em>hungry<\/em> for mentors \/ desperate even\u2014they told me, \u201cI\u2019m <em>desperate<\/em> for a mentor.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>\u2014\u201cravenous!\u201d Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> Ravenous!\u2014and yet, not finding them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You said, earlier, you think we need to get rid of the word.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So women and men are desperate for mentors, but they don\u2019t want to call them mentors.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>The reason we would like to deep-six the word, mentor, is because\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Hold it! You really want to get rid of it!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Deep-six.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Deep-six it. At least, in the way we interact\u2014when we train, fine; but when we actually are in relationships, we want to get rid of it. We want to help women, especially older women, who have this\u2014this fixed image of what a mentor is. It\u2019s the reason they feel very unqualified. They feel like they don\u2019t have time for it. They look in the mirror and they see someone, and they say: \u201cWell, I don\u2019t measure up. I\u2019m sure not going in for that!\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe want to get rid of it because of the baggage that is associated with the term. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe would <em>love<\/em> to completely revamp and revolutionize the entire way that the Christian world looks at how we help people who are behind us in life\u2014how we help them grow up.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Barbara, you actually did some research on this\u2014that upwards of 80 percent of younger women, after they\u2019d started some kind of mentoring relationship, dropped out within six months.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> Not so much a mentoring relationship but a mentoring program\u2014you know, signed up to be matched up with a mentor, usually through their church. Eighty percent of those gals, in the first three months, had abandoned that relationship or that opportunity. What they told me is, \u201cThis is not working for me.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI investigated \u201cWhy?\u201d My research was targeted on: \u201cWhy? I want to listen to you. I want to hear what you are saying,\u201d\u2014what the young women are saying\u2014\u201cWhy is this not working for you? What do we need to change?\u201d We\u2019re losing this younger generation, and we have particularly lost that ability to impact them through mentoring relationships. It is because of the way it\u2019s been structured for many years\u2014that\u2019s what they told me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>The key word you used was \u201cprogram.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Program; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Programmatic. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Programmatic.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Doesn\u2019t work with next-gen women.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> Most of them find this just\u2014they can\u2019t relate to the way it is structured. It feels artificial \/ it feels awkward. Many times they end up in awkward relationships with women that they don\u2019t know or that they don\u2019t admire. It\u2019s forced\u2014the schedule feels forced \/ the relationship feels forced. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMost of them now are looking at this type of a mentoring structure and saying: \u201cI\u2019m not interested in that. That doesn\u2019t work for me.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>As you bring that up, I\u2019m thinking about a co-worker, who came to me years ago and he said, \u201cWould you mentor me?\u201d And my first thought was, \u201cNo!\u201d [Laughter] \u201cI don\u2019t know what you\u2019re talking about.\u201d Actually, what I said to him was, \u201cI don\u2019t know what your expectation of that is.\u201d I said: \u201cIf you want to get together and have lunch a couple times a month and just talk about life, I\u2019m up for that. If you\u2019re expecting something different\u2014a curriculum \/ something that I\u2019m going to take you through and, at the end, you get a certificate\u2014I\u2019m not equipped for that.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat turned out\u2014we started getting together, having lunch, talking about life. That\u2019s really all we\u2019re talking about; isn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>That\u2019s all we\u2019re talking about. That\u2019s what we\u2019re attempting to help people, younger women particularly, understand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey want\u2014we call it a \u201ccompulsory click.\u201d They need that \u201cclick\u201d with that person they admire, for whatever reason. We don\u2019t know what it is about someone that we think: \u201cWow! I\u2019d love to take that person to coffee,\u201d or \u201cI\u2019d like to have them in to my every day family life and have some time together while I\u2019m watching the kids, or while I\u2019m doing carpool and they\u2019re with me, or we\u2019re going shopping together, or we just sit and have coffee together.\u201d We talk about life: \u201cWhat\u2019s going on in your life?\u201d\u2014it\u2019s more of that. C.S. Lewis had that wonderful quote where he said, \u201cThink of me as a fellow patient in the same hospital who, having been admitted a little earlier, could give some advice.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue:<\/strong> I just love that. That just sets that\u2014we don\u2019t sign on for any particular program \/ we don\u2019t sign on: \u201cWe\u2019re going to meet them this many times.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s all pretty much driven by the needs in the life of that younger person, who needs a guide.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I would think that that first time getting together might be easier than the second time getting together. Here\u2019s what I\u2019m imagining\u2014if somebody comes and says, \u201cHey, could we have coffee?\u201d and you say, \u201cSure, we could have coffee.\u201d You have it, and it\u2019s a nice relationship\u2014\u201cI\u2019ve really enjoyed being here,\u201d\u2014and it\u2019s over.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, the question is: \u201cWho takes the next step to say, \u2018Do you want to get together again?\u2019\u201d Does the older woman, who was invited out\u2014does she get forward?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue:<\/strong> We say, \u201cNo.\u201d What we heard from younger women is that it\u2019s that younger woman who needs to make that decision and to take the initiative\u2014although, we help. We help by showing an interest in them. Sometimes, I\u2019ll just text: \u201cHow are you? The Lord brought you to my heart. I want you to know I\u2019m praying for you.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe do things like that to show her that we care, but it needs to be driven by the mentee. Wouldn\u2019t you agree, Barbara? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Absolutely; because they will initiate contact based on what is going on in their life and their schedule\u2014so whenever it works for them. They will reach out again if, as you say Bob, that first conversation is a good one and it is a helpful one.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> They will come back for more because it added value to their life. If you\u2019re open\u2014if you are friendly \/ if they know that they can ask, they will. Usually, it is a text because that is the way they communicate. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf I do text them, I often find that they will text back and they\u2019ll say: \u201cOh, I\u2019m doing great! Hey, can you meet for coffee this week?\u201d It is initiated and driven by their schedule \/ their needs and what it is they want to talk about.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> When we were first married, we lived in Dallas. I remember we came to a point in our marriage where I felt like Barbara needed to talk to an older woman, not to me, as her young husband, who is also in a steep learning curve of his own. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Clueless would be the word. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>That would be correct\u2014that would be correct. I repeated my rookie season several years. [Laughter] Anyway, she needed to talk to somebody; and I had to really, really, really encourage her to make the call. To just underscore what you ladies are saying, I do think it needs to come from the mentee, reaching out to the person they\u2019d like to spend some time with. I think, in many cases, it\u2019s going to take a husband, alongside of his wife, or a very good friend, saying, \u201cYou know, I just want to encourage you\u2014reach out to Such-and-such.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis actually happened here recently. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere\u2019s a Christian leader, who has gone through some challenges, just in terms of busyness and all that is taking place in his life, and ministry, and their family. He said, \u201cYou know, my wife would really like to talk with your wife.\u201d And I said: \u201cLet\u2019s do it! Let\u2019s arrange it.\u201d So we did. They met. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI doubled back with him and I said, \u201cLet me just remind you\u2014you need to encourage your wife to call Barbara again.\u201d Why? Because I think there are some young women in this generation who don\u2019t have the self-confidence and feel like they\u2019re intruding\u2014and older women who are busy \/ who have other responsibilities. I mean, you\u2019ve both said you\u2019ve got a lot going on. Younger women look at your lives: \u201cOh, Sue would never have time for me.\u201d I would say to that young lady, \u201cDon\u2019t make the decision for Sue.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Absolutely! That\u2019s so important; yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe can have a <em>welcoming<\/em> demeanor. It\u2019s amazing how we do this. I probably meet with several women every week just because\u2014some of it is because of the book. I tell them, \u201cI never turned anybody down,\u201d\u2014I actually haven\u2019t. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Uh-oh. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>This broadcast is heard in\u2014and in Houston. [Laughter] You have to be careful! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>You know, God orchestrates this\u2014I mean, we have to be flexible \/ we have boundaries on our life. We are very\u2014we take good care of ourselves \/ we have to\u2014but God works this out. It\u2019s not like these women want to talk to you every week or every month. Most of the time, it\u2019s very flexible \/ it\u2019s very organic. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe strange thing is\u2014Barbara and I\u2014we were talking about this last night. We\u2019re both introverts\u2014we <em>love<\/em> people, but we can get exhausted by people\u2014but the joy that it\u2019s brought to my life, and I think Barbara would agree, is just incomparable. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to get <em>that<\/em> across to older women, who think: \u201cOh my goodness. This is something I have to give up. I have to put this in my schedule\u2014I don\u2019t really want to. I\u2019m making all the sacrifices.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> But it\u2019s life-giving; isn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes, it\u2019s life-giving to <em>both<\/em>. It\u2019s actually doing something, one person at a time, to make a difference. Our goal, through the book, is to have older women come to love and understand\u2014and not put up unnecessary road blocks and hindrances. I think we do just because we come from a different frame of reference.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I just want to speak to the listener right now. You\u2019ve just heard a compelling case being made to get in the game and to make an impact in another person\u2019s life\u2014perhaps a little younger. I looked the word, \u201cmentor,\u201d up in the dictionary. It means \u201cExperienced and trusted advisor.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Somebody\u2019s been in the hospital a few days longer than you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Exactly\u2014I love that C.S. Lewis quote\u2014no doubt about it. If you\u2019ve had a few more experiences than a younger person, or even an older person, who\u2019s new to the faith\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Absolutely.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014you have something to share from your brokenness \/ from your mistakes you\u2019ve made. In fact, I say that some of your best teaching moments are from your mistakes and your errors that you\u2019ve made because you can pass along some godly advice to another person and perhaps keep them out of the ditch.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I just encourage women\u2014and for that matter, men\u2014to get a copy of this book, <em>Organic Mentoring<\/em>, because I think this is something that applies to both sexes, men and women\u2014certainly something the next generation <em>desperately<\/em> wants and needs\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I think there is a desire to do it; but the question is: \u201cHow do we do it effectively?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what the book addresses. We\u2019ve got copies of the book, <em>Organic Mentoring,<\/em> in our <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>Resource Center. You can go, online, to FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link that says, \u2018GO DEEPER,\u2019 and find out how to order a copy of <em>Organic Mentoring: A Mentor\u2019s Guide to Relationships with Next Generation Women<\/em> by Sue Edwards and Barbara Neumann. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com and order your copy of the book; or call if you\u2019d like to order: 1-800-FL-TODAY is our toll-free number\u20141-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d and in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s interesting\u2014we have had people tell us over the years that <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> has been used by God in a mentoring kind of relationship. We\u2019re grateful to God for this medium \/ for this opportunity\u2014the privilege that that is\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014to be able to pour into the lives of other men, into the lives of couples, moms and dads. We\u2019re grateful to those of you who support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> and make all of this possible. We are listener-supported. Your donations help cover the cost of producing and syndicating this daily radio program. So \u201cThank you for partnering with us and making this kind of mentoring possible.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you can make a donation today in support of the ministry, we\u2019d really love to hear from you. You can go, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link in the upper right-hand corner of the screen that says, \u201cI Care\u201d\u2014make an online donation. Or call 1-800-FL-TODAY\u2014make a donation over the phone. Or you can mail your donation to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBy the way, along with the donation, if you\u2019d let us know that you\u2019d like a copy of Barbara Rainey\u2019s book, <em>Growing Together in Gratitude<\/em>\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014seven stories about gratefulness that you can read together as a family\u2014we\u2019d love to send you that as our way of saying, \u201cThank you for your partnership with us in this ministry.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you can be back with us tomorrow. We\u2019re going to continue our conversation about older women pouring into the lives of younger women as we talk more about <em>Organic Mentoring <\/em>tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back Thursday for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2015 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["23.76M"],"filesize_raw":["24909257"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-303744.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-303744.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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Neumann and Dr. Sue Edwards encourage women to forget everything they thought they knew about mentoring in order to minister to a younger generation.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-11-18.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>The book of Titus says that older men are to teach younger men and older women are to teach younger women.Author Sue Edwards says that\u2019s something that we need to take seriously. Particularly, she says, older women need to be intentional about that assignment. At the same time, they don\u2019t need to start a mentoring program.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>We don\u2019t sign on for any particular program\u2014we don\u2019t sign on: \u201cWe\u2019re going to meet them this many times.\u201d It\u2019s all pretty much driven by the needs in the life of that younger person who needs a guide. To help them and to be part of that process is one of the most <em>enriching<\/em> experiences.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>for Wednesday, November 18<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. How can an older woman fulfill God\u2019s assignment to her to teach younger women and do that effectively? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ll explore that subject today. Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em> Thanks for joining us. You just used a word, when we were talking before we stepped in here, that I just want to find out if it is a real word. Maybe our guest can help us on this. You used the word, \u201cmentee.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow I\u2019ve seen Mentos. Those are the things\u2014the mints you buy at the store. You know what I\u2019m talking about?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And I know what a mentor is, but I just don\u2019t know if mentee is a legitimate word.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>We have a couple of doctors with us, here in the studio, from Dallas Theological Seminary, Dr. Barbara Neumann and Dr. Sue Edwards. We\u2019ll just ask you ladies. First of all, welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Thank you so much.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> Thank you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>So is mentee\u2014is that in the dictionary now? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>I\u2019m assuming it is\u2014I haven\u2019t <em>looked<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYes, we use it all the time. It\u2019s terminology that helps us because we need terminology to talk about this topic.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>A person being mentored\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>\u2014is a mentee.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014is a mentee. It\u2019s not a prot\u00e9g\u00e9. Somebody corrected me one time and said, \u201cYou have mentors and prot\u00e9g\u00e9s.\u201d They said, \u201cMentee is not a word.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Well, if you would like to call it a prot\u00e9g\u00e9, we\u2019re going to talk about why a lot of that terminology is not even necessary and why we actually need to drop a lot of it anyway. How about that?!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Well I see our chief engineer is googling the word, even as we speak right now. We will have an authoritative answer\u2014[Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014from Wikipedia. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I actually thought mentee was one of those mammals that crawls up on the beach. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That would be a manatee\u2014that\u2019s what you were thinking about. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Manatee.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Let me just introduce our guests today. Dr. Edwards is the Associate Professor of Educational Ministries in Leadership at Dallas Theological Seminary. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe has written five books. Dr. Neumann is also a graduate of Dallas Seminary and an Adjunct Professor in Educational Ministries in Leadership, as well, in the Houston branch of Dallas Theological Seminary.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>We have to say, at this point, is growing really fast\u2014over 300 students there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTogether, you have collaborated to write a book that I really enjoyed\u2014<em>Organic Mentoring: A Mentor\u2019s Guide to Relationships with Next Generation Women.<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Yes<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You both came to faith in Christ in your 20s. Women\/older women were influential in your life. Sue, explain how that happened and how God used mentors in your life, as a younger woman.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>I came out of a dysfunctional home \/ a non-Christian home. My mother was an angry, bitter woman, trying to make the best of life as she knew it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was a <em>mess<\/em> by the time I reached college. I graduated from college still wandering, trying to figure out: \u201cWhat in the world is life about?\u201d Married\u2014actually, my husband was a back-slidden Baptist because he married me, a pagan\u2014not supposed to do that\u2014but God was overseeing it. Thank You, Lord! We moved to Dallas for his first engineering job\u2014had a couple of lovely little daughters that I <em>adored<\/em>. I <em>adored<\/em> my husband, but I was a mess trying to be a mom and trying to figure out life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA neighbor down the street invited me to a women\u2019s Bible study. There, I found the Lord and I found mentors. Very organically\u2014this was nothing programmed. For 15 years, those women walked alongside me as dear friends. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey trained me and they taught me to lead small groups, and write Bible curriculum, and ultimately to teach the Bible. I ended up going to DTS to be a better Bible teacher in what was a parachurch women\u2019s Bible study, which was very prominent at that time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You mentioned that, not only did they introduce you to the Redeemer, they also were used by God to bring a lot of healing in your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You keep using the word, \u201cmess.\u201d What was the mess, in essence?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Serious depression and just had no idea I was self-absorbed. I had grown up an only child. My mother was extremely critical. She thought every\u2014wanted to be sure nobody was prideful\u2014and she made pretty sure I wasn\u2019t. Her critical spirit \/ constant negativity ended up causing me to\u2014just a loss of personhood. I fell into a deep depression. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I want to point something else out, too, because you just kind of went past this. Here you were\u2014a married mother of two, living in a neighborhood\u2014and somebody said, \u201cWould you be interested in going to the woman\u2019s Bible study?\u201d We kind of think, \u201cThe lady down the street, who doesn\u2019t go to church, she\u2019s not going to be interested in going to the ladies Bible study,\u201d and \u201cI I invite her, she\u2019s probably going to think I\u2019m weird.\u201d So we don\u2019t invite folks like that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>We don\u2019t do that enough. People are around us, all the time, who are desperate for what life is about. A lot of times, we are hesitant. Now, this is back in the early 70s. So, maybe, they weren\u2019t quite as hesitant as they are now; but yes, she did. We were friends. Oh my goodness, what a difference it made.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Just to underscore what Bob was talking about there\u2014I seldom get on a plane and sit next to a stranger who doesn\u2019t finally ask me, \u201cWhat do you do?\u201d When I tell them I work for the number one Homebuilder in the world\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014the God who builds all marriages and families\u2014they get off into their own drama. Everybody\u2019s got a story \/ everyone has needs. To your point, I think a lot of folks\u2014I don\u2019t know if it\u2019s over 50 percent\u2014but I think they\u2019re hopeless.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Absolutely.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>They don\u2019t know how to do this thing called life. They\u2019re ready to talk about their relationships. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAlright; Barbara, let\u2019s go to how you met Christ and how God used women in your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> I have a remarkably similar story to Sue\u2019s\u2014raised in a non-believing, alcoholic home. My dad was an alcoholic; and my mom was just a dysfunctional person, really not able to put together a meaningful life at all. When I left that home, when I was 18 years old, I essentially felt like I was a ship adrift in the ocean. I didn\u2019t have direction\u2014nobody had ever given me any help on how to live life\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014not a believer. Met my husband \/ we married. Both of us basically were ships that were drifting without a lot of direction. We came to Christ the same night. Someone came and just gave us a very simple explanation of the gospel. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Came to your home?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> Came to my home. It was a man who was at the church that we were sort of attending at the time. I think he realized that there was something very important missing. He came just to explain to us new life in Christ. We both knew that was the missing piece. We both knew that what we needed to do was to receive Christ, which we did. The same time, we knelt down together, received Christ. A wonderful start\u2014but I still didn\u2019t know how to live life, as a believing woman. I was still confused about a whole lot of things, and I didn\u2019t know how to make this new life work. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI did end up in a women\u2019s Bible study as well; but the mentoring that took place for me, at that time, was mentoring from a distance. The women, who would stand up and teach\u2014I learned a lot and I absorbed a lot from them\u2014but again, from a distance. I <em>longed<\/em> for someone to listen to what was going on in my life and help me figure out how to make godly decisions, how to move forward with God, how to love other people. I didn\u2019t learn these things at home. This is what I longed for and didn\u2019t find that for many years. There were just not a lot of women who were available enough or confident enough to mentor.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I think both men and women today are looking for models as never before.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> As never before.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>This is what we\u2019ve found when we have looked into the mentoring situation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe have a generation of young people who are <em>hungry<\/em> for mentors \/ desperate even\u2014they told me, \u201cI\u2019m <em>desperate<\/em> for a mentor.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>\u2014\u201cravenous!\u201d Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> Ravenous!\u2014and yet, not finding them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You said, earlier, you think we need to get rid of the word.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So women and men are desperate for mentors, but they don\u2019t want to call them mentors.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>The reason we would like to deep-six the word, mentor, is because\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Hold it! You really want to get rid of it!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Deep-six.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Deep-six it. At least, in the way we interact\u2014when we train, fine; but when we actually are in relationships, we want to get rid of it. We want to help women, especially older women, who have this\u2014this fixed image of what a mentor is. It\u2019s the reason they feel very unqualified. They feel like they don\u2019t have time for it. They look in the mirror and they see someone, and they say: \u201cWell, I don\u2019t measure up. I\u2019m sure not going in for that!\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe want to get rid of it because of the baggage that is associated with the term. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe would <em>love<\/em> to completely revamp and revolutionize the entire way that the Christian world looks at how we help people who are behind us in life\u2014how we help them grow up.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Barbara, you actually did some research on this\u2014that upwards of 80 percent of younger women, after they\u2019d started some kind of mentoring relationship, dropped out within six months.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> Not so much a mentoring relationship but a mentoring program\u2014you know, signed up to be matched up with a mentor, usually through their church. Eighty percent of those gals, in the first three months, had abandoned that relationship or that opportunity. What they told me is, \u201cThis is not working for me.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI investigated \u201cWhy?\u201d My research was targeted on: \u201cWhy? I want to listen to you. I want to hear what you are saying,\u201d\u2014what the young women are saying\u2014\u201cWhy is this not working for you? What do we need to change?\u201d We\u2019re losing this younger generation, and we have particularly lost that ability to impact them through mentoring relationships. It is because of the way it\u2019s been structured for many years\u2014that\u2019s what they told me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>The key word you used was \u201cprogram.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Program; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Programmatic. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Programmatic.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Doesn\u2019t work with next-gen women.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> Most of them find this just\u2014they can\u2019t relate to the way it is structured. It feels artificial \/ it feels awkward. Many times they end up in awkward relationships with women that they don\u2019t know or that they don\u2019t admire. It\u2019s forced\u2014the schedule feels forced \/ the relationship feels forced. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMost of them now are looking at this type of a mentoring structure and saying: \u201cI\u2019m not interested in that. That doesn\u2019t work for me.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>As you bring that up, I\u2019m thinking about a co-worker, who came to me years ago and he said, \u201cWould you mentor me?\u201d And my first thought was, \u201cNo!\u201d [Laughter] \u201cI don\u2019t know what you\u2019re talking about.\u201d Actually, what I said to him was, \u201cI don\u2019t know what your expectation of that is.\u201d I said: \u201cIf you want to get together and have lunch a couple times a month and just talk about life, I\u2019m up for that. If you\u2019re expecting something different\u2014a curriculum \/ something that I\u2019m going to take you through and, at the end, you get a certificate\u2014I\u2019m not equipped for that.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat turned out\u2014we started getting together, having lunch, talking about life. That\u2019s really all we\u2019re talking about; isn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>That\u2019s all we\u2019re talking about. That\u2019s what we\u2019re attempting to help people, younger women particularly, understand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey want\u2014we call it a \u201ccompulsory click.\u201d They need that \u201cclick\u201d with that person they admire, for whatever reason. We don\u2019t know what it is about someone that we think: \u201cWow! I\u2019d love to take that person to coffee,\u201d or \u201cI\u2019d like to have them in to my every day family life and have some time together while I\u2019m watching the kids, or while I\u2019m doing carpool and they\u2019re with me, or we\u2019re going shopping together, or we just sit and have coffee together.\u201d We talk about life: \u201cWhat\u2019s going on in your life?\u201d\u2014it\u2019s more of that. C.S. Lewis had that wonderful quote where he said, \u201cThink of me as a fellow patient in the same hospital who, having been admitted a little earlier, could give some advice.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue:<\/strong> I just love that. That just sets that\u2014we don\u2019t sign on for any particular program \/ we don\u2019t sign on: \u201cWe\u2019re going to meet them this many times.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s all pretty much driven by the needs in the life of that younger person, who needs a guide.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I would think that that first time getting together might be easier than the second time getting together. Here\u2019s what I\u2019m imagining\u2014if somebody comes and says, \u201cHey, could we have coffee?\u201d and you say, \u201cSure, we could have coffee.\u201d You have it, and it\u2019s a nice relationship\u2014\u201cI\u2019ve really enjoyed being here,\u201d\u2014and it\u2019s over.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, the question is: \u201cWho takes the next step to say, \u2018Do you want to get together again?\u2019\u201d Does the older woman, who was invited out\u2014does she get forward?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue:<\/strong> We say, \u201cNo.\u201d What we heard from younger women is that it\u2019s that younger woman who needs to make that decision and to take the initiative\u2014although, we help. We help by showing an interest in them. Sometimes, I\u2019ll just text: \u201cHow are you? The Lord brought you to my heart. I want you to know I\u2019m praying for you.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe do things like that to show her that we care, but it needs to be driven by the mentee. Wouldn\u2019t you agree, Barbara? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara: <\/strong>Absolutely; because they will initiate contact based on what is going on in their life and their schedule\u2014so whenever it works for them. They will reach out again if, as you say Bob, that first conversation is a good one and it is a helpful one.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong> They will come back for more because it added value to their life. If you\u2019re open\u2014if you are friendly \/ if they know that they can ask, they will. Usually, it is a text because that is the way they communicate. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf I do text them, I often find that they will text back and they\u2019ll say: \u201cOh, I\u2019m doing great! Hey, can you meet for coffee this week?\u201d It is initiated and driven by their schedule \/ their needs and what it is they want to talk about.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> When we were first married, we lived in Dallas. I remember we came to a point in our marriage where I felt like Barbara needed to talk to an older woman, not to me, as her young husband, who is also in a steep learning curve of his own. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Clueless would be the word. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>That would be correct\u2014that would be correct. I repeated my rookie season several years. [Laughter] Anyway, she needed to talk to somebody; and I had to really, really, really encourage her to make the call. To just underscore what you ladies are saying, I do think it needs to come from the mentee, reaching out to the person they\u2019d like to spend some time with. I think, in many cases, it\u2019s going to take a husband, alongside of his wife, or a very good friend, saying, \u201cYou know, I just want to encourage you\u2014reach out to Such-and-such.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis actually happened here recently. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere\u2019s a Christian leader, who has gone through some challenges, just in terms of busyness and all that is taking place in his life, and ministry, and their family. He said, \u201cYou know, my wife would really like to talk with your wife.\u201d And I said: \u201cLet\u2019s do it! Let\u2019s arrange it.\u201d So we did. They met. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI doubled back with him and I said, \u201cLet me just remind you\u2014you need to encourage your wife to call Barbara again.\u201d Why? Because I think there are some young women in this generation who don\u2019t have the self-confidence and feel like they\u2019re intruding\u2014and older women who are busy \/ who have other responsibilities. I mean, you\u2019ve both said you\u2019ve got a lot going on. Younger women look at your lives: \u201cOh, Sue would never have time for me.\u201d I would say to that young lady, \u201cDon\u2019t make the decision for Sue.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Absolutely! That\u2019s so important; yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe can have a <em>welcoming<\/em> demeanor. It\u2019s amazing how we do this. I probably meet with several women every week just because\u2014some of it is because of the book. I tell them, \u201cI never turned anybody down,\u201d\u2014I actually haven\u2019t. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Uh-oh. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>This broadcast is heard in\u2014and in Houston. [Laughter] You have to be careful! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>You know, God orchestrates this\u2014I mean, we have to be flexible \/ we have boundaries on our life. We are very\u2014we take good care of ourselves \/ we have to\u2014but God works this out. It\u2019s not like these women want to talk to you every week or every month. Most of the time, it\u2019s very flexible \/ it\u2019s very organic. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe strange thing is\u2014Barbara and I\u2014we were talking about this last night. We\u2019re both introverts\u2014we <em>love<\/em> people, but we can get exhausted by people\u2014but the joy that it\u2019s brought to my life, and I think Barbara would agree, is just incomparable. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to get <em>that<\/em> across to older women, who think: \u201cOh my goodness. This is something I have to give up. I have to put this in my schedule\u2014I don\u2019t really want to. I\u2019m making all the sacrifices.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> But it\u2019s life-giving; isn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes, it\u2019s life-giving to <em>both<\/em>. It\u2019s actually doing something, one person at a time, to make a difference. Our goal, through the book, is to have older women come to love and understand\u2014and not put up unnecessary road blocks and hindrances. I think we do just because we come from a different frame of reference.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I just want to speak to the listener right now. You\u2019ve just heard a compelling case being made to get in the game and to make an impact in another person\u2019s life\u2014perhaps a little younger. I looked the word, \u201cmentor,\u201d up in the dictionary. It means \u201cExperienced and trusted advisor.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Somebody\u2019s been in the hospital a few days longer than you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Exactly\u2014I love that C.S. Lewis quote\u2014no doubt about it. If you\u2019ve had a few more experiences than a younger person, or even an older person, who\u2019s new to the faith\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Absolutely.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014you have something to share from your brokenness \/ from your mistakes you\u2019ve made. In fact, I say that some of your best teaching moments are from your mistakes and your errors that you\u2019ve made because you can pass along some godly advice to another person and perhaps keep them out of the ditch.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sue: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I just encourage women\u2014and for that matter, men\u2014to get a copy of this book, <em>Organic Mentoring<\/em>, because I think this is something that applies to both sexes, men and women\u2014certainly something the next generation <em>desperately<\/em> wants and needs\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I think there is a desire to do it; but the question is: \u201cHow do we do it effectively?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s what the book addresses. We\u2019ve got copies of the book, <em>Organic Mentoring,<\/em> in our <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>Resource Center. You can go, online, to FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link that says, \u2018GO DEEPER,\u2019 and find out how to order a copy of <em>Organic Mentoring: A Mentor\u2019s Guide to Relationships with Next Generation Women<\/em> by Sue Edwards and Barbara Neumann. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com and order your copy of the book; or call if you\u2019d like to order: 1-800-FL-TODAY is our toll-free number\u20141-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d and in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s interesting\u2014we have had people tell us over the years that <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> has been used by God in a mentoring kind of relationship. We\u2019re grateful to God for this medium \/ for this opportunity\u2014the privilege that that is\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014to be able to pour into the lives of other men, into the lives of couples, moms and dads. We\u2019re grateful to those of you who support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> and make all of this possible. We are listener-supported. Your donations help cover the cost of producing and syndicating this daily radio program. So \u201cThank you for partnering with us and making this kind of mentoring possible.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you can make a donation today in support of the ministry, we\u2019d really love to hear from you. You can go, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link in the upper right-hand corner of the screen that says, \u201cI Care\u201d\u2014make an online donation. Or call 1-800-FL-TODAY\u2014make a donation over the phone. Or you can mail your donation to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBy the way, along with the donation, if you\u2019d let us know that you\u2019d like a copy of Barbara Rainey\u2019s book, <em>Growing Together in Gratitude<\/em>\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014seven stories about gratefulness that you can read together as a family\u2014we\u2019d love to send you that as our way of saying, \u201cThank you for your partnership with us in this ministry.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you can be back with us tomorrow. We\u2019re going to continue our conversation about older women pouring into the lives of younger women as we talk more about <em>Organic Mentoring <\/em>tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back Thursday for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2015 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/303744","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=303744"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=303744"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=303744"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=303744"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=303744"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=303744"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=303744"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}