{"id":303690,"date":"2015-10-06T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2015-10-06T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/a-shoulder-to-lean-on\/"},"modified":"2015-10-06T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2015-10-06T15:00:00","slug":"a-shoulder-to-lean-on","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/a-shoulder-to-lean-on\/","title":{"rendered":"A Shoulder to Lean On"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>guest: Vivian Mabuni | Series: Warrior in Pink | Cancer doesn&#8217;t just affect cancer patients, but also those who love them. Wife and mother of three Vivian Mabuni takes us through her breast cancer journey from beginning to end: from mastectomy, to chemo, and finally, radiation. Mabuni tells how her family, friends, and especially her husband, encouraged, cared and prayed her through her cancer treatment.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Cancer doesn&#8217;t just affect cancer patients, but also those who love them. Wife and mother of three Vivian Mabuni takes us through her breast cancer journey from beginning to end.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-10-06.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"25.99M","filesize_raw":"27248106","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2822,2093],"tags":[4279,2451,5823,5821,5822,5824],"podcast_series":[8102],"cwp_profile":[9404],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-303690","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-growing-in-your-faith","category-women","tag-breast-cancer","tag-cancer-scare","tag-chemotherapy","tag-finding-hope-in-community","tag-mastectomy","tag-radiation","podcast_series-warrior-in-pink","cwp_profile-vivian-mabuni","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/303690\/a-shoulder-to-lean-on","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/303690\/a-shoulder-to-lean-on","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"zhtgR8JcsW\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/a-shoulder-to-lean-on\/\">A Shoulder to Lean On<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/a-shoulder-to-lean-on\/embed\/#?secret=zhtgR8JcsW\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;A Shoulder to Lean On&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"zhtgR8JcsW\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-10-06.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-10-06.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Vivian Mabuni is a wife, she\u2019s a mom, she\u2019s a full-time missionary with Cru<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, and she is a follower of Christ. There\u2019s one other thing that defines her\u2014she is a breast cancer survivor.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>What\u2019s so interesting about breast cancer in itself\u2014I think there is only one other cancer, maybe colon cancer, that I would probably be uncomfortable talking about\u2014but any other type or form feels easier to talk about\u2014but because breasts are very private. Yet it\u2019s everywhere. Honestly, I think 240,000 women were diagnosed, last year, with breast cancer\u2014so it is not an insignificant number.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>for Tuesday, October 6<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We\u2019re going to talk today about the challenges that come with a diagnosis like breast cancer\u2014how you find strength for the journey. Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em> Thanks for joining us. You have, in the years that you and Barbara have been married, had the challenges of health issues in your marriage that have a way of exposing the core pretty quickly. Your marriage and what it\u2019s made of gets exposed in the middle of health challenges in a way that it doesn\u2019t get exposed in other settings; don\u2019t you think?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It really does. I think there\u2019s a reason why Jesus ended the Sermon on the Mount with the illustration of the wise man being the one who built his house on the rock. So when the floods came and the winds blew and beat against that house, it didn\u2019t fall because it had been founded upon Jesus Christ. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think that\u2019s what a couple has to realize, as they start a marriage\u2014they have to build their marriage to withstand the storms. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s nota matter of \u201cif\u201d; it\u2019s a matter of \u201cwhen\u201d; and it\u2019s a matter of \u201chow many.\u201d I would say, on no less than a half dozen occasions, Bob, sometimes, I look at Barbara and I go, \u201cYou\u2019re really kind of wearing me out on these health issues that you\u2019ve gone through.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur guest on the program today, Vivian Mabuni, joins us again today, telling and sharing about her story of breast cancer. Vivian\u2014welcome back to the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Thank you so much for having me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> She and her husband Darrin have three children \/ live in Southern California. They serve in the Epic Movement of Cru, formerly Campus Crusade for Christ<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>\u2014it\u2019s the Asian-American ministry of Cru. She has written a book called <em>Warrior in Pink<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You\u2019ve already shared with us this week about the journey that God took you on\u2014where you had a lump in your breast \/ you went to your doctor. She didn\u2019t seem concerned; but she said, \u201cWe ought to do a mammogram.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou had the mammogram. That led to an ultrasound that led to a core biopsy\u2014all in the same afternoon. Three days later, you got the diagnosis that, indeed, you had\u2014and tell me what it was again?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Invasive lobular carcinoma. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> On the scale of cancers, is that a bad one?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>It is just one of the forms of breast cancer. Some are found within the duct, and lobular was outside of the duct.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Mine was a moderately slower growing one; but it ended up being either stage 3 or 2B, depending on how the doctor diagnoses it after the surgery.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>So that means it was invasive.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It was an aggressive form of cancer.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You got this diagnosis on a Monday morning in the middle of the Christmas season. Everything kind of comes to a halt in those moments; doesn\u2019t it? All of the rest of life gets set aside because, now, we\u2019ve got something urgent we have to deal with.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> That\u2019s right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember\u2014somehow, I made my way back to the car, after I called my husband in tears, just saying, \u201cCan you please come and meet me back at home?\u201d I remember sitting there, just tears streaming down my face, because I was in shock, all the way up until that moment. Then, when I talked to Darrin on the phone, the words started to tumble out with what was going on. I remember looking out the window, and all the cars were driving by, and just thought, \u201cEveryone is going somewhere, but my life has just been derailed.\u201d That was even before the official diagnosis, but I knew that things had radically changed.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You shared earlier that you invited three friends, who became the \u201cA 3\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes\u2014the Awesome Threesome.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014the three closest friends that you had\u2014to be burden-bearers in the midst of this. You also had three children.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>What were their ages, and how did you end up sharing this with them?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes. Jonathan is our oldest. At the time, he was 14\u2014had just started high school. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMichael was 11. He was a sixth grader in elementary school. Julia was in first grade\u2014so she was the tender age of six.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Wow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>It was three days before Christmas.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>To have that different age range, with this kind of news: \u201cWhat are you going to tell them? How are you going to tell them?\u201d And you\u2019re going to tell one child something different than you\u2019re going to tell the other because of what they understand. How did you decide to tackle this?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes. We decided to wait until after Christmas to tell our family and to tell them the news so that they could enjoy Christmas. I remember that particular Christmas\u2014I felt like I watched it from the outside, wondering how they were going to respond to the news. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe told our boys together, while Julia was lost in her new pile of toys. We pulled them over to the dining room table and sat down with them. We decided that we were going to honest with them\u2014we would be straightforward \/ we would use the right terms\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014it is kind of like sex education. If you can just be honest, and straightforward, and tell them the facts, kids are actually pretty resilient if they know what you are dealing with. We gave them as much information as we knew at that time. I think they were in shock, just like we were.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> They had three different responses though; didn\u2019t they?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> They did. My oldest was very quiet. Then my middle son looked up at me and he said, \u201cMom, did God give you cancer?\u201d That question just pierced me. I kind of had to pull it together to not just burst out into tears at that moment. It was a window of opportunity to explore with them God\u2019s character and His sovereignty\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> \u2014in the midst of allowing something like this to happen. We explained: \u201cGod does not give us cancer, but we live in a fallen world. God has allowed this to happen. We don\u2019t know why, but we are going to choose to trust Him with each step of the way.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cWe are going to choose to give you whatever information we know so that you know what is going on.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLater, we talked with just Julia; and she was six. As soon as we told her, she just burst out into tears. She had, at that point, had heard the word before and only had associated it with, \u201cMommy\u2019s going to die.\u201d Trying to comfort her and be with her in that was excruciating because, as a mom, I don\u2019t want my kids to hurt in any way. If I could take away the pain, I would; but I knew that they were going to have to grow up in some ways because of this new chapter that we were going to be going on.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>At this point, did you know what the treatment protocol was going to be?\u2014what the doctors were recommending?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes. At that point, we had met with a number of doctors\u2014enough to know that I would probably go through chemotherapy and then radiation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt the time, I was young\u2014younger than I am now\u2014so they wanted to treat it very aggressively. They took three very strong chemotherapy medicines and combined them. They said, if my body could handle it, that would be the best way to attack the cells\u2014is to use all these different ways.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Talk about your surgery options because that is a\u2014such a tough thing for a woman and husband to face.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes; yes\u2014it really was. I think, for me, I was bombarded by so many new terms and new ways of dealing with health. I hadn\u2019t even been to a doctor that much up until that point. Honestly, I took Advil<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> maybe twice a year. It wasn\u2019t like I had been sick before and now it was very aggressively being treated. The treatment actually made me feel worse than having the tumor growing in me at that time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> What did the doctors tell you the surgery was going to involve?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> The lobular carcinoma had a greater chance of developing in the other breast. I had decided, \u201cI want just\u00a0 to try to get rid of this as best I can, here and now,\u201d\u2014so decided to do the double mastectomy at the time. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf I look back on it now, I wish I would have done a better job of bringing my husband in on the decision because I was just in this slew of: \u201cWe have to decide. We have to figure things out.\u201d I was reading everything I could. People were sending me links, and blog posts, and all of that. I regret not sitting down with Darrin and really having a heart-to-heart, more in that moment. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Was that because he wasn\u2019t necessarily there with you and the doctor at the time?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>No. He was absolutely there with me every step of the way. It was interesting\u2014he is such an attentive and involved husband and dad. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe was with me just about every chemotherapy\u2014he went to all of the appointments. It was really <em>me<\/em>\u2014I think I was starting to turn inside. It wasn\u2019t even so much that he wasn\u2019t available, it was my trying to, I think, gain control somehow and make these decisions.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I think that\u2019s an interesting point to just make here\u2014is that when we go through something like this, the tendency is to withdraw\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014it\u2019s not to reach out. You already used, in an earlier broadcast, the illustration of a woman who had been diagnosed with breast cancer, who didn\u2019t allow anybody into her life, and ultimately committed suicide. Even though you had heard that, it\u2019s interesting that a form of depression that comes with news like this can really cause us to retreat. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs husbands\u2014it may be incumbent upon <em>us<\/em> to pursue, and reach out, and find ways to connect, and make sure we\u2019re totally sharing one another\u2019s burdens at that point. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes. I think what was helpful\u2014with it not being just Darrin \/ but also having the Awesome Threesome\u2014is that it kind of helped to balance out the help so it didn\u2019t all rest on Darrin\u2019s shoulders or my friends\u2019 shoulders. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI picture Jesus and the paralytic\u2014and the four friends lowering the paralytic to the ground, to Jesus. That\u2019s kind of how I pictured the Awesome Threesome and Darrin\u2014actually, carrying me on a mat \/ bringing me to Jesus because there were times when I didn\u2019t even have the faith to pray or trust God. God used my friends and my husband to be His hands and feet.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>The decision that you faced\u2014to cut away as much of the cancer as possible and deal with this in an aggressive way\u2014is a decision to permanently disfigure\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014yourself. That\u2019s not an insignificant decision\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014maybe not even one that you recognized, at the time, there\u2019d be ongoing impact of that choice that you\u2019d wrestle with for years.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes. I think what\u2019s so interesting about breast cancer in itself\u2014I think there is only one other cancer, maybe colon cancer, that I would probably be uncomfortable talking about\u2014but any other type or form feels easier to talk about\u2014but because breasts are private \/ you know, these kinds of decisions are very private\u2014and yet it\u2019s everywhere. Honestly, I think 240,000 women were diagnosed, last year, with breast cancer\u2014so it is not an insignificant number.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt really is a decision about, as a woman, things that define me, as a woman. Losing my hair was so difficult\u2014I think that was honestly harder than losing my breasts. There are several parts of the journey that made it excruciating. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> How long did you go through chemo and radiation? You went through several rounds. What was the total duration of all of that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Chemo was six rounds every three weeks\u2014so that was about four months. Radiation was daily\u2014Monday through Friday for 33 treatments\u2014which was another six weeks. I think the total active treatment would be about nine months.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That\u2019s a long year. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>It was a very long year.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And a year when you kind of have to put everything else in life on hold in order to walk that journey. At the end of that journey, the Threesome threw a party for you; didn\u2019t they?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>[Laughing] Yes, they did. We call it \u201cThe Great Celebration.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> We just invited everyone. Our church is within walking distance from our house. I think that our entire church had our garage code memorized [Laughter] because we had a little refrigerator out there, and people would bring groceries and meals. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you ever wonder what it takes to be a mom\u2014I just have to\u2014a shout-out to all those moms out there\u2014it took an army\u2014between the figuring out \/ we tried to keep our kids\u2019 lives as normal as possible\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014so we had football practice, and marching band practice, and soccer games, and all that. It required an <em>army<\/em> to come alongside to do the drop-offs, and the pick-ups, and everything to keep our family going. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo we invited everyone. Darrin had an incredible men\u2019s Bible study that met on Tuesdays, and I believe their prayers carried us through as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> What, today, is your prognosis?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>I am in remission. My oncologist told me:\u201dYou can\u2019t really call yourself cancer-free. The term we use is \u2018remission\u2019.\u201d\u00a0 I\u2019ve been in remission since 2009.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Has there been anything else pop up?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> The only on-going thing is I have what\u2019s called lymphedema because the cancer had spread to my lymph nodes\u2014so they removed all the lymph nodes. Now, I have to wear a compression sleeve when I travel or if I get a mosquito bite or something. It\u2019s more uncomfortable \/ it\u2019s not life-threatening.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Do you have screenings on a regular basis?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>I go in to see my oncologist every six months. It used to be every three to four months. Now, it\u2019s been moved to every six months. I\u2019ll continue to see her.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Back to the image you gave of \u201cIt takes an army to replace a mom,\u201d\u2014that\u2019s an understatement. I couldn\u2019t help but think, as you were sharing that story, of what happened, here at FamilyLife, a little over a year ago, when a tornado took the life of one of our staff members, here, and two of his daughters. They had nine children. It destroyed their home and rolled the other seven kids out into what was really a mess\u2014a bunch of uprooted trees. The mom survived \/ the baby survived; but nonetheless, at the end, all that was left of their home was a slab.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s interesting\u2014I went by\u2014and I\u2019ve been to the spot where the tornado hit on a number of occasions. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJust down the street is another house that got hit. I don\u2019t know those people, I don\u2019t know the story, I don\u2019t know what took place; but that house is now abandoned. It\u2019s not been cleaned up \/ the uprooted trees and the debris are still there. I couldn\u2019t help but think, \u201cI wonder if, perhaps, they aren\u2019t people of faith \/ that they aren\u2019t followers of Christ and don\u2019t have an army around them,\u201d because that\u2019s what cleaned up and stood with the Tittle family\u2014that is their name\u2014of the family who was left after their dad was taken \/ husband. You just see when the body of Christ responds.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou were a blessed woman\u2014not only to have a husband and children that stood with you\u2014but also a church\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014that stood by you in that. There is an important message that every person really ought to heed.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve got one last question for you before we finish here. I\u2019m really curious to see how you would answer this. If I was to ask you, \u201cWhat\u2019s the most courageous thing you\u2019ve ever done in your life?\u201d how would you answer?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> I think the most courageous thing was being able to show up to every treatment and go through all of the medical appointments \/ the doctor appointments. To learn to be a gracious receiver\u2014that actually required a tremendous amount of courage because I wanted to be the strong one. My pride wants to be the strong one. Actually, courage\u2014as funny as it is\u2014it wasn\u2019t so much like jumping out of an airplane as much as it was allowing community to come and love our family\u2014to receive that love\u2014and to understand that I\u2019m blessed to be a blessing but, in that moment, I was in need. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod provided, but I still needed to receive it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You\u2019re saying <em>receiving<\/em> from others may be the most courageous thing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Maybe; maybe\u2014or being on a radio program? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> It\u2019s interesting because the title of your book, <em>Warrior in Pink<\/em>\u2014the subtitle: <em>A story of Cancer, Community, and the God Who Comforts<\/em>\u2014community is a big part of this story and a big part of the reason why you wrote this book because we do need one another. There are times when it\u2019s hard, but we just have to be on the receiving end and be recipients of the grace of our friends in our lives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It\u2019s sometimes difficult for people, who are really talented and really good at helping others, to choke down not being able to help themselves\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014and just saying a very simple word, \u201cHelp.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> This is where the Christian community\u2014I know we have our flaws\u2014but we do show up, and we do show up in strength.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Vivian, I so appreciate you and Darrin, and your ministry in California to Asian-American college students, and all that you\u2019re doing. I hope that a lot of listeners will pick this book up and maybe give it to a friend.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> I wrote it hoping to be able to share some of the things that we have learned. Also, in the back\u2014have a little appendix for the caregiver\u2014because I think Darrin was such an incredible blessing\u2014but I think sometimes the caregiver isn\u2019t acknowledged. I use in the book the illustration of\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014the Sherpa.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> \u2014the Sherpa because he talked about how\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014I would refer to this cancer journey as a marathon race. We ended up going to marriage counseling afterwards because it just surfaced\u2014just amplified and surfaced our existing patterns. In that counseling office, I was finally able to hear him share. He said: \u201cYou know, Vivian, you talk about cancer being a marathon race. I ran that entire race in step with you, with a huge back pack on; but I was on the outside of the race tape. I ran it with you, but no one was holding up signs and cheering me on. When I got to the end of the race, I was exhausted.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think that the caregiver often\u2014when I have opportunities to share with groups of people about my cancer story, one of the most important points is: \u201c\u2026to not forget the caregiver,\u201d because they really do shoulder so much and don\u2019t receive, in the same way, the encouragement, and the direct prayers, or the notes of encouragement.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You\u2019ve got an appendix, \u201cThoughts for the Caretakers,\u201d you\u2019ve got a note to parents who still have kids at home as you\u2019re going through this battle, and then a letter to a newly-diagnosed cancer patient.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0Again, I hope our listeners will get a copy of the book, <em>Warrior in Pink<\/em>. We have got it in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. You can go, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link in the upper left-hand corner of the screen that says, \u201cGO DEEPER,\u201d and you\u2019ll find Vivian\u2019s book there. You can order it from us, online\u2014again, our website: FamilyLifeToday.com. Or, if you\u2019d prefer to call to order the book, our toll-free number is 1-800-FL-TODAY\u20141-800-358-6329. That\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you face the kind of diagnosis that Vivian faced, that\u2019s when you need friends \/ that\u2019s when you need your family. That\u2019s when you need people to come around and say: \u201cWe\u2019re here for you. We will hold you up. We want to provide encouragement, support, help, and hope.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHere, at FamilyLife, we want to be one of those allies \/ one of those resources available to you when you are facing challenges in your marriage and in your family and you\u2019re looking for help, and hope, and advice, and support. We want you to be able to turn to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Our mission is to provide help and hope so that we can effectively develop godly families because we believe godly marriages and families will change the world, one home at a time. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019re grateful for those of you who are allies in this mission with us\u2014those of you who provide the financial support for this ministry. We could not do what we do without folks, like you, pitching in to be a part of this work. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019re able to help with a donation today, we would like to send you a resource that we hope will get some lively conversation started around your dinner table. It\u2019s a new resource from Barbara Rainey. It\u2019s called \u201cUntie Your Story\u201d\u2014it\u2019s a spool of napkin ribbons. Each one has a provocative question on it designed to get you and your guests talking, at the dinner table, about more than just surface-level conversation.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, the \u201cUntie Your Story\u201d resource is our thank-you gift when you support the ministry, this month, with a donation. You can go to FamilyLifeToday.com to make your donation online. Click the link in the upper right-hand corner of the screen that says, \u201cI Care,\u201d to make an online donation. Or call 1-800-FL-TODAY\u2014you can make your donation over the phone. Or if you\u2019d prefer, mail your donation to us at <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; and our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we have a couple of pediatricians who are going to be joining us. We\u2019re going to talk about the health issues that parents face as they raise children\u2014everything from colic and croup, all the way up to immunizations during the school years, and some of the teenage health challenges. I hope you can join us tomorrow as we have that conversation.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2015 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["25.99M"],"filesize_raw":["27248106"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-303690.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-303690.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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doesn't just affect cancer patients, but also those who love them. Wife and mother of three Vivian Mabuni takes us through her breast cancer journey from beginning to end.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-10-06.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Vivian Mabuni is a wife, she\u2019s a mom, she\u2019s a full-time missionary with Cru<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, and she is a follower of Christ. There\u2019s one other thing that defines her\u2014she is a breast cancer survivor.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>What\u2019s so interesting about breast cancer in itself\u2014I think there is only one other cancer, maybe colon cancer, that I would probably be uncomfortable talking about\u2014but any other type or form feels easier to talk about\u2014but because breasts are very private. Yet it\u2019s everywhere. Honestly, I think 240,000 women were diagnosed, last year, with breast cancer\u2014so it is not an insignificant number.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>for Tuesday, October 6<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We\u2019re going to talk today about the challenges that come with a diagnosis like breast cancer\u2014how you find strength for the journey. Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em> Thanks for joining us. You have, in the years that you and Barbara have been married, had the challenges of health issues in your marriage that have a way of exposing the core pretty quickly. Your marriage and what it\u2019s made of gets exposed in the middle of health challenges in a way that it doesn\u2019t get exposed in other settings; don\u2019t you think?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It really does. I think there\u2019s a reason why Jesus ended the Sermon on the Mount with the illustration of the wise man being the one who built his house on the rock. So when the floods came and the winds blew and beat against that house, it didn\u2019t fall because it had been founded upon Jesus Christ. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think that\u2019s what a couple has to realize, as they start a marriage\u2014they have to build their marriage to withstand the storms. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s nota matter of \u201cif\u201d; it\u2019s a matter of \u201cwhen\u201d; and it\u2019s a matter of \u201chow many.\u201d I would say, on no less than a half dozen occasions, Bob, sometimes, I look at Barbara and I go, \u201cYou\u2019re really kind of wearing me out on these health issues that you\u2019ve gone through.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur guest on the program today, Vivian Mabuni, joins us again today, telling and sharing about her story of breast cancer. Vivian\u2014welcome back to the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Thank you so much for having me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> She and her husband Darrin have three children \/ live in Southern California. They serve in the Epic Movement of Cru, formerly Campus Crusade for Christ<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>\u2014it\u2019s the Asian-American ministry of Cru. She has written a book called <em>Warrior in Pink<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You\u2019ve already shared with us this week about the journey that God took you on\u2014where you had a lump in your breast \/ you went to your doctor. She didn\u2019t seem concerned; but she said, \u201cWe ought to do a mammogram.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou had the mammogram. That led to an ultrasound that led to a core biopsy\u2014all in the same afternoon. Three days later, you got the diagnosis that, indeed, you had\u2014and tell me what it was again?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Invasive lobular carcinoma. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> On the scale of cancers, is that a bad one?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>It is just one of the forms of breast cancer. Some are found within the duct, and lobular was outside of the duct.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Mine was a moderately slower growing one; but it ended up being either stage 3 or 2B, depending on how the doctor diagnoses it after the surgery.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>So that means it was invasive.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It was an aggressive form of cancer.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You got this diagnosis on a Monday morning in the middle of the Christmas season. Everything kind of comes to a halt in those moments; doesn\u2019t it? All of the rest of life gets set aside because, now, we\u2019ve got something urgent we have to deal with.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> That\u2019s right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember\u2014somehow, I made my way back to the car, after I called my husband in tears, just saying, \u201cCan you please come and meet me back at home?\u201d I remember sitting there, just tears streaming down my face, because I was in shock, all the way up until that moment. Then, when I talked to Darrin on the phone, the words started to tumble out with what was going on. I remember looking out the window, and all the cars were driving by, and just thought, \u201cEveryone is going somewhere, but my life has just been derailed.\u201d That was even before the official diagnosis, but I knew that things had radically changed.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You shared earlier that you invited three friends, who became the \u201cA 3\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes\u2014the Awesome Threesome.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014the three closest friends that you had\u2014to be burden-bearers in the midst of this. You also had three children.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>What were their ages, and how did you end up sharing this with them?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes. Jonathan is our oldest. At the time, he was 14\u2014had just started high school. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMichael was 11. He was a sixth grader in elementary school. Julia was in first grade\u2014so she was the tender age of six.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Wow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>It was three days before Christmas.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>To have that different age range, with this kind of news: \u201cWhat are you going to tell them? How are you going to tell them?\u201d And you\u2019re going to tell one child something different than you\u2019re going to tell the other because of what they understand. How did you decide to tackle this?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes. We decided to wait until after Christmas to tell our family and to tell them the news so that they could enjoy Christmas. I remember that particular Christmas\u2014I felt like I watched it from the outside, wondering how they were going to respond to the news. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe told our boys together, while Julia was lost in her new pile of toys. We pulled them over to the dining room table and sat down with them. We decided that we were going to honest with them\u2014we would be straightforward \/ we would use the right terms\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014it is kind of like sex education. If you can just be honest, and straightforward, and tell them the facts, kids are actually pretty resilient if they know what you are dealing with. We gave them as much information as we knew at that time. I think they were in shock, just like we were.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> They had three different responses though; didn\u2019t they?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> They did. My oldest was very quiet. Then my middle son looked up at me and he said, \u201cMom, did God give you cancer?\u201d That question just pierced me. I kind of had to pull it together to not just burst out into tears at that moment. It was a window of opportunity to explore with them God\u2019s character and His sovereignty\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> \u2014in the midst of allowing something like this to happen. We explained: \u201cGod does not give us cancer, but we live in a fallen world. God has allowed this to happen. We don\u2019t know why, but we are going to choose to trust Him with each step of the way.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cWe are going to choose to give you whatever information we know so that you know what is going on.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLater, we talked with just Julia; and she was six. As soon as we told her, she just burst out into tears. She had, at that point, had heard the word before and only had associated it with, \u201cMommy\u2019s going to die.\u201d Trying to comfort her and be with her in that was excruciating because, as a mom, I don\u2019t want my kids to hurt in any way. If I could take away the pain, I would; but I knew that they were going to have to grow up in some ways because of this new chapter that we were going to be going on.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>At this point, did you know what the treatment protocol was going to be?\u2014what the doctors were recommending?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes. At that point, we had met with a number of doctors\u2014enough to know that I would probably go through chemotherapy and then radiation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt the time, I was young\u2014younger than I am now\u2014so they wanted to treat it very aggressively. They took three very strong chemotherapy medicines and combined them. They said, if my body could handle it, that would be the best way to attack the cells\u2014is to use all these different ways.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Talk about your surgery options because that is a\u2014such a tough thing for a woman and husband to face.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes; yes\u2014it really was. I think, for me, I was bombarded by so many new terms and new ways of dealing with health. I hadn\u2019t even been to a doctor that much up until that point. Honestly, I took Advil<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> maybe twice a year. It wasn\u2019t like I had been sick before and now it was very aggressively being treated. The treatment actually made me feel worse than having the tumor growing in me at that time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> What did the doctors tell you the surgery was going to involve?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> The lobular carcinoma had a greater chance of developing in the other breast. I had decided, \u201cI want just\u00a0 to try to get rid of this as best I can, here and now,\u201d\u2014so decided to do the double mastectomy at the time. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf I look back on it now, I wish I would have done a better job of bringing my husband in on the decision because I was just in this slew of: \u201cWe have to decide. We have to figure things out.\u201d I was reading everything I could. People were sending me links, and blog posts, and all of that. I regret not sitting down with Darrin and really having a heart-to-heart, more in that moment. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Was that because he wasn\u2019t necessarily there with you and the doctor at the time?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>No. He was absolutely there with me every step of the way. It was interesting\u2014he is such an attentive and involved husband and dad. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe was with me just about every chemotherapy\u2014he went to all of the appointments. It was really <em>me<\/em>\u2014I think I was starting to turn inside. It wasn\u2019t even so much that he wasn\u2019t available, it was my trying to, I think, gain control somehow and make these decisions.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I think that\u2019s an interesting point to just make here\u2014is that when we go through something like this, the tendency is to withdraw\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014it\u2019s not to reach out. You already used, in an earlier broadcast, the illustration of a woman who had been diagnosed with breast cancer, who didn\u2019t allow anybody into her life, and ultimately committed suicide. Even though you had heard that, it\u2019s interesting that a form of depression that comes with news like this can really cause us to retreat. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs husbands\u2014it may be incumbent upon <em>us<\/em> to pursue, and reach out, and find ways to connect, and make sure we\u2019re totally sharing one another\u2019s burdens at that point. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes. I think what was helpful\u2014with it not being just Darrin \/ but also having the Awesome Threesome\u2014is that it kind of helped to balance out the help so it didn\u2019t all rest on Darrin\u2019s shoulders or my friends\u2019 shoulders. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI picture Jesus and the paralytic\u2014and the four friends lowering the paralytic to the ground, to Jesus. That\u2019s kind of how I pictured the Awesome Threesome and Darrin\u2014actually, carrying me on a mat \/ bringing me to Jesus because there were times when I didn\u2019t even have the faith to pray or trust God. God used my friends and my husband to be His hands and feet.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>The decision that you faced\u2014to cut away as much of the cancer as possible and deal with this in an aggressive way\u2014is a decision to permanently disfigure\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014yourself. That\u2019s not an insignificant decision\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014maybe not even one that you recognized, at the time, there\u2019d be ongoing impact of that choice that you\u2019d wrestle with for years.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes. I think what\u2019s so interesting about breast cancer in itself\u2014I think there is only one other cancer, maybe colon cancer, that I would probably be uncomfortable talking about\u2014but any other type or form feels easier to talk about\u2014but because breasts are private \/ you know, these kinds of decisions are very private\u2014and yet it\u2019s everywhere. Honestly, I think 240,000 women were diagnosed, last year, with breast cancer\u2014so it is not an insignificant number.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt really is a decision about, as a woman, things that define me, as a woman. Losing my hair was so difficult\u2014I think that was honestly harder than losing my breasts. There are several parts of the journey that made it excruciating. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> How long did you go through chemo and radiation? You went through several rounds. What was the total duration of all of that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Chemo was six rounds every three weeks\u2014so that was about four months. Radiation was daily\u2014Monday through Friday for 33 treatments\u2014which was another six weeks. I think the total active treatment would be about nine months.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That\u2019s a long year. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>It was a very long year.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And a year when you kind of have to put everything else in life on hold in order to walk that journey. At the end of that journey, the Threesome threw a party for you; didn\u2019t they?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>[Laughing] Yes, they did. We call it \u201cThe Great Celebration.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> We just invited everyone. Our church is within walking distance from our house. I think that our entire church had our garage code memorized [Laughter] because we had a little refrigerator out there, and people would bring groceries and meals. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you ever wonder what it takes to be a mom\u2014I just have to\u2014a shout-out to all those moms out there\u2014it took an army\u2014between the figuring out \/ we tried to keep our kids\u2019 lives as normal as possible\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014so we had football practice, and marching band practice, and soccer games, and all that. It required an <em>army<\/em> to come alongside to do the drop-offs, and the pick-ups, and everything to keep our family going. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo we invited everyone. Darrin had an incredible men\u2019s Bible study that met on Tuesdays, and I believe their prayers carried us through as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> What, today, is your prognosis?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>I am in remission. My oncologist told me:\u201dYou can\u2019t really call yourself cancer-free. The term we use is \u2018remission\u2019.\u201d\u00a0 I\u2019ve been in remission since 2009.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Has there been anything else pop up?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> The only on-going thing is I have what\u2019s called lymphedema because the cancer had spread to my lymph nodes\u2014so they removed all the lymph nodes. Now, I have to wear a compression sleeve when I travel or if I get a mosquito bite or something. It\u2019s more uncomfortable \/ it\u2019s not life-threatening.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Do you have screenings on a regular basis?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>I go in to see my oncologist every six months. It used to be every three to four months. Now, it\u2019s been moved to every six months. I\u2019ll continue to see her.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Back to the image you gave of \u201cIt takes an army to replace a mom,\u201d\u2014that\u2019s an understatement. I couldn\u2019t help but think, as you were sharing that story, of what happened, here at FamilyLife, a little over a year ago, when a tornado took the life of one of our staff members, here, and two of his daughters. They had nine children. It destroyed their home and rolled the other seven kids out into what was really a mess\u2014a bunch of uprooted trees. The mom survived \/ the baby survived; but nonetheless, at the end, all that was left of their home was a slab.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s interesting\u2014I went by\u2014and I\u2019ve been to the spot where the tornado hit on a number of occasions. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJust down the street is another house that got hit. I don\u2019t know those people, I don\u2019t know the story, I don\u2019t know what took place; but that house is now abandoned. It\u2019s not been cleaned up \/ the uprooted trees and the debris are still there. I couldn\u2019t help but think, \u201cI wonder if, perhaps, they aren\u2019t people of faith \/ that they aren\u2019t followers of Christ and don\u2019t have an army around them,\u201d because that\u2019s what cleaned up and stood with the Tittle family\u2014that is their name\u2014of the family who was left after their dad was taken \/ husband. You just see when the body of Christ responds.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou were a blessed woman\u2014not only to have a husband and children that stood with you\u2014but also a church\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014that stood by you in that. There is an important message that every person really ought to heed.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve got one last question for you before we finish here. I\u2019m really curious to see how you would answer this. If I was to ask you, \u201cWhat\u2019s the most courageous thing you\u2019ve ever done in your life?\u201d how would you answer?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> I think the most courageous thing was being able to show up to every treatment and go through all of the medical appointments \/ the doctor appointments. To learn to be a gracious receiver\u2014that actually required a tremendous amount of courage because I wanted to be the strong one. My pride wants to be the strong one. Actually, courage\u2014as funny as it is\u2014it wasn\u2019t so much like jumping out of an airplane as much as it was allowing community to come and love our family\u2014to receive that love\u2014and to understand that I\u2019m blessed to be a blessing but, in that moment, I was in need. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod provided, but I still needed to receive it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You\u2019re saying <em>receiving<\/em> from others may be the most courageous thing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Maybe; maybe\u2014or being on a radio program? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> It\u2019s interesting because the title of your book, <em>Warrior in Pink<\/em>\u2014the subtitle: <em>A story of Cancer, Community, and the God Who Comforts<\/em>\u2014community is a big part of this story and a big part of the reason why you wrote this book because we do need one another. There are times when it\u2019s hard, but we just have to be on the receiving end and be recipients of the grace of our friends in our lives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian: <\/strong>That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It\u2019s sometimes difficult for people, who are really talented and really good at helping others, to choke down not being able to help themselves\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014and just saying a very simple word, \u201cHelp.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> This is where the Christian community\u2014I know we have our flaws\u2014but we do show up, and we do show up in strength.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Vivian, I so appreciate you and Darrin, and your ministry in California to Asian-American college students, and all that you\u2019re doing. I hope that a lot of listeners will pick this book up and maybe give it to a friend.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> I wrote it hoping to be able to share some of the things that we have learned. Also, in the back\u2014have a little appendix for the caregiver\u2014because I think Darrin was such an incredible blessing\u2014but I think sometimes the caregiver isn\u2019t acknowledged. I use in the book the illustration of\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014the Sherpa.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Vivian:<\/strong> \u2014the Sherpa because he talked about how\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014I would refer to this cancer journey as a marathon race. We ended up going to marriage counseling afterwards because it just surfaced\u2014just amplified and surfaced our existing patterns. In that counseling office, I was finally able to hear him share. He said: \u201cYou know, Vivian, you talk about cancer being a marathon race. I ran that entire race in step with you, with a huge back pack on; but I was on the outside of the race tape. I ran it with you, but no one was holding up signs and cheering me on. When I got to the end of the race, I was exhausted.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think that the caregiver often\u2014when I have opportunities to share with groups of people about my cancer story, one of the most important points is: \u201c\u2026to not forget the caregiver,\u201d because they really do shoulder so much and don\u2019t receive, in the same way, the encouragement, and the direct prayers, or the notes of encouragement.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You\u2019ve got an appendix, \u201cThoughts for the Caretakers,\u201d you\u2019ve got a note to parents who still have kids at home as you\u2019re going through this battle, and then a letter to a newly-diagnosed cancer patient.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0Again, I hope our listeners will get a copy of the book, <em>Warrior in Pink<\/em>. We have got it in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. You can go, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link in the upper left-hand corner of the screen that says, \u201cGO DEEPER,\u201d and you\u2019ll find Vivian\u2019s book there. You can order it from us, online\u2014again, our website: FamilyLifeToday.com. Or, if you\u2019d prefer to call to order the book, our toll-free number is 1-800-FL-TODAY\u20141-800-358-6329. That\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you face the kind of diagnosis that Vivian faced, that\u2019s when you need friends \/ that\u2019s when you need your family. That\u2019s when you need people to come around and say: \u201cWe\u2019re here for you. We will hold you up. We want to provide encouragement, support, help, and hope.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHere, at FamilyLife, we want to be one of those allies \/ one of those resources available to you when you are facing challenges in your marriage and in your family and you\u2019re looking for help, and hope, and advice, and support. We want you to be able to turn to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Our mission is to provide help and hope so that we can effectively develop godly families because we believe godly marriages and families will change the world, one home at a time. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019re grateful for those of you who are allies in this mission with us\u2014those of you who provide the financial support for this ministry. We could not do what we do without folks, like you, pitching in to be a part of this work. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019re able to help with a donation today, we would like to send you a resource that we hope will get some lively conversation started around your dinner table. It\u2019s a new resource from Barbara Rainey. It\u2019s called \u201cUntie Your Story\u201d\u2014it\u2019s a spool of napkin ribbons. Each one has a provocative question on it designed to get you and your guests talking, at the dinner table, about more than just surface-level conversation.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, the \u201cUntie Your Story\u201d resource is our thank-you gift when you support the ministry, this month, with a donation. You can go to FamilyLifeToday.com to make your donation online. Click the link in the upper right-hand corner of the screen that says, \u201cI Care,\u201d to make an online donation. Or call 1-800-FL-TODAY\u2014you can make your donation over the phone. Or if you\u2019d prefer, mail your donation to us at <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; and our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we have a couple of pediatricians who are going to be joining us. We\u2019re going to talk about the health issues that parents face as they raise children\u2014everything from colic and croup, all the way up to immunizations during the school years, and some of the teenage health challenges. I hope you can join us tomorrow as we have that conversation.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2015 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/303690","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=303690"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=303690"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=303690"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=303690"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=303690"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=303690"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=303690"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}