{"id":303624,"date":"2015-08-20T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2015-08-20T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/defining-family-dysfunction\/"},"modified":"2015-08-20T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2015-08-20T15:00:00","slug":"defining-family-dysfunction","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/defining-family-dysfunction\/","title":{"rendered":"Defining Family Dysfunction"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When it comes to your home, is God in charge? Author Michelle Anthony reminds us that being healthy doesn&#8217;t mean being perfect, but rather means letting God be the Lord of our hearts and homes.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-08-20.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"26.47M","filesize_raw":"27760591","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2850,2806],"tags":[5811,5812,2988,5673],"podcast_series":[8099],"cwp_profile":[3347],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-303624","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-character-development","category-spiritual-development","tag-dysfunctional-parenting","tag-how-to-raise-a-child","tag-parenting-advice","tag-parenting-tips","podcast_series-becoming-a-spiritually-healthy-family","cwp_profile-michelle-anthony","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/303624\/defining-family-dysfunction","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/303624\/defining-family-dysfunction","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"mPfN9Kt4nx\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/defining-family-dysfunction\/\">Defining Family Dysfunction<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/defining-family-dysfunction\/embed\/#?secret=mPfN9Kt4nx\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Defining Family Dysfunction&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"mPfN9Kt4nx\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg",508,508,false]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"kfairris@familylife.com","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/kfairrisfamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"When it comes to your home, is God in charge? Author Michelle Anthony reminds us that being healthy doesn't mean being perfect, but rather means letting God be the Lord of our hearts and homes.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-08-20.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Michelle Anthony remembers the day her four-year-old daughter got the best of her. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>We were having a battle of the wills. She was about four years old. She basically told me she didn\u2019t have to obey me. I sat there, and I asked her\u2014\u201cWhy is it that you feel like you don\u2019t have to obey your mommy?\u201d\u00a0 She said, \u201cWell, you\u2019re only third in charge,\u201d\u2014this is a four-year-old. She said, \u201cFirst, God is in charge\u2014then, Daddy; then, you.\u201d\u00a0 I went to my room, and I\u2014if I could have resigned as a mom, I probably would have because I didn\u2019t know how I was going to handle it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Thursday, August 20<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. Have you ever been ready to resign, as a mom or as a dad?\u00a0 Well, hang in there. We\u2019ve got some help for you today. Stay tuned. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. I remember\u2014this was probably\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014I don\u2019t know\u201420 years ago, when I was sitting down with my mom one night. She\u2019d been watching afternoon television\u2014talk shows on TV. She said to me, \u201cWhat\u2019s all this talk about dysfunctional families?\u201d\u00a0 [Laughter] She said, \u201cAren\u2019t all families dysfunctional families?\u201d\u00a0 [Laughter]\u00a0 I said, \u201cYou know, I think at some level, you are probably right, Mom.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes, no doubt about it. You know, it\u2019s interesting, Bob, that you should mention that. I was just looking at Psalm 128, and it\u2019s really talking about your wife being like a fruitful vine and your children like olive shoots around your table. It\u2019s a picture of growing\u2014almost like an olive tree that\u2019s growing and being fruitful. I think families were designed\u2014even in the midst of their dysfunction\u2014to produce fruit. And yet, all of us get married with certain bags we have to unpack. Marriage provides a great place of sanctification where two very broken people can become real. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd I know our guest today\u2014Michelle Anthony\u2014agrees with us because she\u2019s written a book called <em>Becoming a Spiritually Healthy Family<\/em>. Welcome to the broadcast, Michelle. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Thank you. Thank you for having me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You agree with Bob\u2019s mom about how all of us are broken; right?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Right. It\u2019s been said that when there are two or more people in a family, there is dysfunction. So, you\u2019re absolutely right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, I think if you just added one, there is probably some dysfunction there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>That\u2019s true. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You and your husband Michael have been married 27 years. You have two adult children. You, now, live in Colorado Springs. When you guys met, did you have any idea of this dysfunction that you both were bringing into this most intimate of all relationships?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Absolutely not. You know, you\u2019re in that starry-eyed: \u201cHe\u2019s wonderful. He\u2019s perfect,\u201d-state of mind. No, we had no idea. I think we thought we were pretty together. I think we thought we were relatively healthy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe were believers\u2014we were strong believers\u2014we were doing ministry. So, how bad could it get; really?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And I think most couples think that if that foundation is secure, then, there won\u2019t be problems. I would say: \u201cIf that foundation is secure, it gives you a basis from which to deal with the problems that are going to come. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>That\u2019s right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u201cBut there are going to be problems that are going to emerge.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes. In fact, when did it first show up in your marriage, from a brokenness standpoint, as you were raising kids?\u2014because I\u2019d have to say\u2014for Barbara and me: \u201cIt was as we added children that we faced our humanity, our selfishness, and our brokenness in probably the most real ways.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>I think having children exploits the things that are already there. I like to say that children are that life-sized mirror in front of you \/ in front of your marriage. They command that you look at them because your children are now emulating you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey are little yous; you know?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>And they have these things they exploit. You can either blame your child \/ blame your spouse\u2014or that\u2019s an opportunity, as James says\u2014to look in the mirror and, then, not walk away, having done nothing; but actually, bring those broken places to the Lord and say, \u201cI need some help with this.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Your goal, as a couple\u2014and I think a lot of our listeners have the same goal\u2014you wanted to have a spiritually-vibrant, spiritually-healthy, spiritually-strong family. If you were helping a young couple today figure out\u2014\u201cOkay, what should that mean?\u00a0 What should that look like?\u201d\u2014how do you define what a spiritually-healthy family is?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>For me, I probably would have said, \u201cI wanted a spiritual family.\u201d\u00a0 And to me, spiritual could mean so many things; but it really meant, in my distorted thinking, perfect. I wanted a perfect family. I think I thought of the word, spiritual, meaning we\u2019re going to be perfectly pursuing Jesus. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019re going to do life the way that He wanted us. That was a huge burden. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s one of the reasons I call this spiritually <em>healthy<\/em> because spiritual health is this ongoing process\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>\u2014just like your physical health would be. I like to use a metaphor instead of a long list of to-do\u2019s and to-don\u2019ts. A spiritually-healthy family metaphor would be to consider a director\u2019s chair sitting in your home, somewhere prominent. Then\u2014at any given moment, any given day, any given situation\u2014to ask yourself: \u201cWho is sitting in that chair?\u00a0 Am I sitting in that chair?\u00a0 Am I trying to dictate my spouse, my kids, and my life?\u00a0 Am I calling the shots?\u00a0 Am I writing the scenes?\u00a0 Or is God sitting in that director\u2019s chair?\u00a0 Am I giving Him the ability to be first in charge of everyone and everything?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, to me, when we sit in that chair, dysfunction is imminent. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen we allow God to sit in that chair, we begin to function the way that He wants us to; and that becomes spiritual health. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I think what you described in terms of the pressure you were feeling to make your family perfect\u2014I think that\u2019s really a malady that comes with your first-born. You think this is just going to be the ideal situation; and then, you start getting in touch with\u2014that this little creature you\u2019ve given life to is like you and is selfish. That selfishness encroaches on <em>your<\/em> selfishness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>That\u2019s right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And that\u2019s where the chair illustration really is a good one: \u201cAre you going to run the show, or are you going to yield to Christ and become the parent God wants you to be?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>In your book, you talk about, really, several different descriptions of dysfunctional families. I\u2019d like you to just take the first one you talk about\u2014the double-minded parent\u2014and how this can undermine a parent\u2019s effectiveness and keep a family from growing spiritually the way they need to. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Yes, the double-minded parent is somebody who wants the Jesus-plus version of Christianity: \u201cI love Jesus. I want to follow God. I want to know His Word. <em>Plus<\/em>, I sure like a lot of the things that the world has to offer. I want the esteem that the world has to offer. I want the <em>stuff<\/em>. I want more, and I want better\u2014but\u2014oh, no\u2014I definitely want Jesus.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat happens is that we are pursuing two different things at the same time, which is the definition of anxiety\u2014really\u2014to have two things that are fractured going in different directions. That is why our families are experiencing so much anxiety. Never before have we had more moms and dads and, now, even children being medicated for anxiety as early as ages 11 and 12. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You talk about kissing the world goodbye. You\u2019re really trying to call a double-minded parent from being distracted. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Yes. Well, it\u2019s impossible to please two opposing forces. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf they were compatible, perhaps, but these are opposing forces. The things that the world says we should have or do are in opposition to what God says we should have or do. You can\u2019t please both\u2014you will constantly be in that pressure \/in that tension. We have to choose. God <em>requires<\/em> us to choose. He says in the book of Joshua\u2014Joshua commissions the people and says, \u201cChoose this day whom you will serve.\u201d\u00a0 If you choose the world, then, you are basically choosing death. If you choose God, you choose life. We have to choose. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You tell a story about your son, Brendan\u2014is that right?\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014who was\u2014I think, at the time, he was\u2014what?\u2014a toddler,\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014who was evidently misbehaving. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You used some tools to curb his behavior. Explain that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Well, you know, I think, as parents, we know that people are watching us. So, when we are trying to please our parents, our in-laws, the people in our church, and the Lord, we get confused. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think I was confused, as a young mom, about discipline. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was adopting the wooden spoon methodology at the time. My son, Brendan, has a very tender heart. So, I rarely, if ever, actually had to use the wooden spoon. The mere sight of it would correct his course; but there was this one night we had friends over from the church. He was getting up and down, out of bed, quite a bit. I was beginning to see the raised eyebrows of the people from our church about my parenting and my inability to discipline my son. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, with that, I marched into the kitchen to find the wooden spoon; but I could not find the wooden spoon. The spoon had come in a companion pack with other utensils. So, I picked up the wooden meat tenderizer\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Oh! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>\u2014instead because my son was just a toddler. I thought, \u201cIf I hide the mallet in my hand and I just simply walk in his room and show him the wooden dowel, this will be fine. It will be a good substitute.\u201d I walked in the room. I hid the mallet as planned\u2014I showed him the wooden dowel. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI said, \u201cBrendan, I need you to obey your mommy and get back in bed right now. I don\u2019t want you to get out of bed again.\u201d\u00a0 So, lickety-split, he was back in bed. I never heard from him again the whole evening. That was the last we heard of it until the next morning when we were at church. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was the director of children\u2019s ministries at the time. I dropped him off in his little three-year-old classroom. When I picked him up afterward, the volunteer came to me and she said, \u201cMichelle, can I speak to you privately for a moment?\u201d\u00a0 I said, \u201cOf course.\u201d\u00a0 She said, \u201cI\u2019m concerned because, during prayer request time, Brendan prayed that his mommy wouldn\u2019t hit him with the hammer.\u201d\u00a0 [Laughter]\u00a0 To which, of course, I said, \u201cNo, it wasn\u2019t a hammer\u2014it was meat tenderizer.\u201d\u00a0 [Laughter]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes, that makes it all fine. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Because it made it better, somehow, in my mind. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes, sure. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>But you know, for me, it really illustrates that we\u2019re sometimes just doing the best we can. We don\u2019t have all the answers. That is why God\u2019s grace is so important to fill in those gaps. But I look back, and I never really asked God, \u201cGod, how is it that you want us to discipline, Brendan?\u201d\u00a0 I was listening to every other voice in the world, but I never really just asked First-in-charge and who was sitting in the director\u2019s chair to help me understand how He crafted my son. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And when the church group is over, and they are watching your son misbehave, the pressure that you feel, as a mom \/ as a dad\u2014it\u2019s there. It\u2019s real; isn\u2019t it?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Yes. And I think we have to get that straight. Who are we trying to please?\u00a0 If we are going to try to please everyone else, it\u2019s a crazy-maker;\u2014\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Bob: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>\u2014and it doesn\u2019t always have the right ramifications. You know, God is First-in-charge. I learned that phrase from my daughter, actually, during a different argument. We were having a battle of the wills\u2014she and I\u2014very strong-willed child. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe was about four years old. She basically told me she didn\u2019t have to obey me. I probably should have just physically taken her to a room; but I sat there, and I asked her, \u201cWhy is it that you feel like you don\u2019t have to obey your mommy?\u201d\u00a0 She said, \u201cWell, you\u2019re only third in charge,\u201d\u2014this is a four-year-old. She said, \u201cFirst, God is in charge\u2014then, Daddy; then, you.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI wondered if she had been sent off to military preschool or something. [Laughter]\u00a0 But I lost it that day; you know?\u00a0 I wept. I went to my room, and I\u2014if I could have resigned, as a mom, I probably would have because I knew that that was going to happen again\u2014that battle of the wills. I didn\u2019t know how I was going to handle it until her snotty, little words rang in my ear. I thought: \u201cI am. I am not first in charge. God is first in charge.\u201d\u00a0 I started speaking to Him, that day, as if He really was. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>At that point, if you know God is in charge, and you\u2019ve got the Bible and you are following it, and\u2014as you just mentioned earlier, asking Him, \u201cHow do You want me to handle this situation?\u201d\u2014you\u2019re not going to be a double-minded parent. But if you are listening to all the culture and what your friends are doing\u2014because, even within the church, you are going to find a lot of different approaches to raising children, and especially, discipline. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Even, here on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, you might here some things. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I think so!\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And rather than listening to what we say and saying, \u201cOkay, that\u2019s what I should do,\u201d you really have to say, \u201cLord, is that the direction You want our family to go?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes, and go to the Book. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>For my child\u2014nobody else has raised my child\u2014ever. They never will. Only God has entrusted that to me. I love James 1: \u201cIf any of you lacks wisdom, let him go to God who gives generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>There are some parents who, instead of being double-minded, their Achilles\u2019 heel is they just have a hard time saying, \u201cNo.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And when their child says, \u201cMommy,\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014they just cave.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>They cave\u2014yes. Boy, we see this a lot in the grocery store. We see these kids everywhere; don\u2019t we?\u2014we look. I want to empower that parent\u2014I just want to walk up to them and give them strength: \u201cThat \u2018I can\u2019t say no,\u2019\u2014that has a root issue; and all of these things that we do\u2014they have a root issue.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo often, we deal with our dysfunctions at that symptomatic level. We look at the symptom\u2014we look at that mom or that dad\u2014and we say, \u201cJust say no more\u201d; but that\u2019s not really the issue. The issue isn\u2019t just \u201cMake your mouth say two letters.\u201d\u00a0 The issue is so much deeper than that, and that is a fear of not being loved. It\u2019s a fear of being rejected. These people often see their children as an opportunity to have close friends who will never leave them. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Bob: <\/strong>You know, I\u2019m resonating a little bit with that because the times I had a hard time saying, \u201cNo,\u201d as a dad, in my family\u2014there was a fear in my mind\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014that: \u201cIf I draw a line here, I\u2019m drawing a wedge between my child and me.\u201d I don\u2019t know if I wanted a best friend, but I sure didn\u2019t want a child who withdrew from the family, and became a prodigal, and said, \u201cI\u2019m out of here.\u201d\u00a0 I think I was always concerned that too much discipline would lead a child to rebellion. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>I do think too much discipline can lead a child to rebellion. I think to find the appropriate discipline for every child\u2014that goes back to First-in-charge. We have to know because some children need more boundaries than other children \/ some children are so hard on themselves. We have an abundance of grace, and to know the difference is only to know the mind of the Lord of how He crafted that child. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut there are a lot of reasons why we don\u2019t say, \u201cNo,\u201d to our children; but it stems out of fear. You know, yours was, perhaps, the fear that they would rebel against your family, or the Lord, or you, or you would have a broken relationship\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014the fear of being abandoned \/ the fear of not being together with them in decision-making\u2014whatever it is\u2014there is a fear. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Dennis, I think the antidote for that\u2014at least for me\u2014I remember something that Josh McDowell said on our program, years ago, when he said, \u201cThe formula here is\u2014rules without relationship equals rebellion.\u201d\u00a0 To have discipline in place, you also have to have a strong, healthy relationship with your child. If the relationship\u2019s there, it\u2019s not that your child is going to go, \u201cOh, okay, I\u2019ll be happy to do whatever you say\u201d; but even, when they push back, you are not threatening rebellion, at that point. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes, I think just to kind of summarize what we\u2019re talking about here\u2014Michelle is talking about the root issue, which is dealing with the fear of rejection. I think any parent, who has a hard time saying, \u201cNo,\u201d and wants to spoil their children, needs to take a step back and say: \u201cOkay, is that me?\u00a0 Am I trying to get something from my child I shouldn\u2019t be trying to get from him or from her?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, secondly, look beyond getting your needs met from your child to the needs of your child to help them grow up in a healthy way. I\u2019m going to promise you something\u2014giving your children everything they want and not saying, \u201cNo,\u201d is not going to be healthy for them. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>No, absolutely. The world says, \u201cNo,\u201d to our children. Our job, as parents, is to help our children enter into the world, as God-fearing individuals, who make a contribution. They won\u2019t be able to enter into that world because God says, \u201cNo,\u201d too. I mean, the world will say, \u201cNo\u201d; but God says, \u201cNo.\u201d\u00a0 Your boss will say, \u201cNo.\u201d\u00a0 Your spouse will say, \u201cNo.\u201d\u00a0 We aren\u2019t preparing them for life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd what\u2019s interesting\u2014I tell parents a lot\u2014I say, \u201cSay this over and over to yourself in the mirror\u2014wherever you have to say it. I don\u2019t need anything from my child. I don\u2019t need anything from my child.\u201d\u00a0 Now, we want to be loved \/ we want to have a relationship\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014but we don\u2019t need\u2014we are there for them. We are stewards of God\u2019s grace \/ His mercy\u2014to put Him on display in our home. But when we start needing things from our children, this sets up a dysfunctional relationship. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, if a mom\u2019s listening and she thinks: \u201cI have a hard time with this. I have a hard time saying, \u201cNo.\u201d I recognize it. How do I fix that?\u00a0 What\u2019s the step to getting to a place where I can say, \u2018Sweetheart, no, we\u2019re not going to do that.\u2019 Even when they pitch a fit, you stand firm\u2014how do you do that?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>This is where we have to have mentors. We need mentors in our life to give us perspective because\u2014somebody once said, \u201cWhen you are raising children, the days are long; but the years are short.\u201d\u00a0 That mom, who is thinking that\u2014they are in the \u201cdays are long.\u201d They are thinking, myopically, about this moment \/ this situation. But now, we need to fast-forward\u2014we have to look at that child at 18, 25, 32\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014whatever it is\u2014look forward\u2014\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>\u2014\u201cDid I create enabling behaviors in this child that they are now dysfunctional in their marriage?\u2014that they can\u2019t keep a job?\u2014that they don\u2019t have a healthy relationship with their children?\u2014that they don\u2019t disrespect me?\u201d\u2014and later in life\u2014that I am looking toward the future, or am I just looking at today?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you start looking at those things: \u201cHow will this person respect me later? \/ How will this person be healthy?\u201d\u2014if we love our children, then, we want to set them up for success. Then, \u201cNo,\u201d becomes a little easier because we know it\u2019s an investment for the future. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And I want to make just an additional pass, Bob, at your question. I think moms need mentors outside the home that coach them\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014an older woman, who has been there \/ done that, and can help them. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut here is where I would say to moms or dads: \u201cIf you are the one who struggles with saying, \u2018No,\u2019 listen to your spouse. Be accountable to them and say: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201c\u2018The next time you sense I\u2019m being\u2014well, that I am\u2014trying to spoil this child; give them a little too much, maybe; trying to create an entitlement approach to life\u2014would you pull me aside, privately, and just point that out in a loving way and encourage me to just remember the objective?\u2019\u201d\u2014which is what you just talked about. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Remember you are raising an adult. You\u2019ve got to get out to that point where they are independent of you and where they are dependent upon Jesus Christ. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, what I\u2019d encourage you to do is just go before the Lord and say, \u201cLord, would You give me the ability, in the heat of the moment, when I\u2019m feeling manipulated by this little person to get his way or get her way, and I\u2019m about to cave in and give them what they want\u2014it\u2019s not going to be good\u2014would You, by Your Holy Spirit, point that out to me and help me grow beyond that?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And if you are a single parent, Michelle, and you don\u2019t have an ally, who will pull you aside and say, \u201cHey, you are doing it again,\u201d\u2014what do you do?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Michelle: <\/strong>This is a dysfunction that single parents are vulnerable to because they are exhausted. To just finally say, \u201cYes,\u201d allows the situation to go away or the discipline to stop. I would say that person needs a co-parent\u2014that can be a grandparent, that can be an aunt\/ an uncle, that can be a friend \/ another single parent\u2014but start praying, today, that God would send someone who is passionate about helping you raise your child. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, and I think it\u2019s going to be helpful for a single parent or for a mom and a dad to be able to identify what may be the dysfunctional parenting style that is going on in my home. Maybe, it\u2019s two or three different dysfunctional parenting styles\u2014but to read your book and to say, \u201cYes, I\u2019m doing this.\u201d\u00a0 I think that will be helpful for a lot of our listeners. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to encourage them\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014we\u2019ve got copies of Michelle Anthony\u2019s book, <em>Becoming a Spiritually Healthy Family<\/em>, in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. Go to our website, FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link in the upper left-hand corner of the screen that says, \u201cGO DEEPER.\u201d You\u2019ll be right there, where you can order a copy of Michelle\u2019s book. If you would prefer to order by phone, our toll-free number is 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then, the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, it\u2019s the challenges of parenting that often bring a husband and a wife together in prayer\u2014maybe, for the first time in your marriage\u2014but they have just never gotten into the discipline. Maybe, it\u2019s because of the intimate, personal nature of prayer; or maybe, you just don\u2019t know what to do or how to engage with each other. Well, FamilyLife has created a 30-day Oneness Prayer Challenge. We\u2019re going to kick this off during the month of September. If you will sign up with us, we will send you a prayer prompt\u2014it will coach you on how you can pray together around a particular topic each day. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhy not sign-up for the 30-day Oneness Prayer Challenge?\u00a0 Go to our website, FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link in the upper left-hand corner of the screen that says, \u201cGO DEEPER\u201d; and then join us\u2014during the month of September, every day\u2014praying together with your spouse for 30 days. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd while you are on our website, can we also ask you to consider making a yearend contribution in support of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>?\u00a0 We\u2019re listener-supported, and we are about to end our fiscal year. September starts a brand-new year for us, fiscally. We\u2019re hoping, over the next ten days, that you would consider giving us a yearend boost with a contribution in support of this ministry. You can do that, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link in the upper right-hand corner of the screen that says, \u201cI CARE,\u201d and make an online donation. Or call 1-800-FL-TODAY. Make your donation over the phone. Or you can mail your donation to us at <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd our zip code is 72223. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd by the way, if you can help with a donation today, we\u2019d like to send you a copy of a book by Dennis and Barbara Rainey called <em>Two Hearts Praying as One<\/em>. It\u2019ll help get you ready for the 30-day prayer challenge during the month of September. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to continue to talk about how we cultivate spiritual health in our family. Michelle Anthony will be back with us. Hope you can be back as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2015 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/303624","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=303624"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=303624"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=303624"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=303624"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=303624"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=303624"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=303624"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}