{"id":303483,"date":"2015-05-07T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2015-05-07T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/a-baby-on-the-way-surprise-surprise\/"},"modified":"2015-05-07T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2015-05-07T15:00:00","slug":"a-baby-on-the-way-surprise-surprise","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/a-baby-on-the-way-surprise-surprise\/","title":{"rendered":"A Baby on the Way&#8211;Surprise, Surprise!"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Author Leslie Leyland Fields, a mother of six, talks candidly about her experience of coping with an unplanned pregnancy not once, but twice, many years after she thought her family was complete.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-05-07.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"25.73M","filesize_raw":"26981887","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2838],"tags":[5648,5647],"podcast_series":[7580],"cwp_profile":[3067],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-303483","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-mothers","tag-pregnant-again","tag-unexpected-pregnancy","podcast_series-surprise-child","cwp_profile-leslie-leyland-fields","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/303483\/a-baby-on-the-way-surprise-surprise","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/303483\/a-baby-on-the-way-surprise-surprise","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"4EyfpQYzPU\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/a-baby-on-the-way-surprise-surprise\/\">A Baby on the Way&#8211;Surprise, Surprise!<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/a-baby-on-the-way-surprise-surprise\/embed\/#?secret=4EyfpQYzPU\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;A Baby on the Way&#8211;Surprise, Surprise!&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"4EyfpQYzPU\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-05-07.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-05-07.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Leslie Fields was a 43-year-old mother of four when she unexpectedly found herself pregnant. She was not thrilled with the news, but there came a day in the doctor's office when all that changed. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Sound of a heart beating]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie:<\/strong> The first thing I hear, of course, is my own heartbeat. My heart is beating faster than normal; and he\u2019s scooting the thing all around my belly, looking for that other heartbeat. <em>Suddenly<\/em>, there is this sound; and it <em>filled<\/em> the room. Even though I had been through this so many times before, my eyes just <em>went wide<\/em>. I realize, now\u2014this is not just a pregnancy \/ this is not just an interruption and a complication to my life\u2014this is a human being.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Thursday, May 7<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ll hear today about Leslie Fields\u2019 unplanned late-in-life pregnancy and about how she responded to that news. Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Thursday edition. I had a friend of mine, on staff here, the other day, who\u2014we were in a conversation. He said, \u201cYou know what really annoys me?\u201d\u2014he said, \u201cWhen people ask you about your children; and they say, \u2018Were they planned?\u2019\u201d\u00a0 He says: \u201cI always want to say, \u2018Well, yes; Somebody had a plan for these kids,\u2019\u2014right?\u2014\u2018even if we didn\u2019t. There is a plan.\u2019\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI got to thinking about that\u2014and I thought, \u201cI bet, 100 years ago, people didn't ask the question because we talk about planning your family today in a way that they didn\u2019t talk about it 100 years ago.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe live in a very different era, and people think differently today about having kids; don\u2019t they?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>They do. In fact, it\u2019s been interesting to watch five of our six children marry and watch them begin their own families and talk about <em>planning<\/em> a family. And, you know, as we talk about this subject, Bob, there are a lot of listeners\u2014in fact, we know from research, about 10 percent plan to have a family and can\u2019t get pregnant when they want to. Infertility is a very real deal. As we talk about this today, I want our listeners, who have struggled with infertility, to know we\u2019re sensitive to them and we love them. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd as people have planned pregnancies, they also have unplanned pregnancies. In fact, our guest today, Leslie Fields, had an experience, at the age of 43, after already having four children. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou had an unplanned pregnancy; is that right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>I sure did. That is true.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And she has turned this into a book, <em>Surprise Child: Finding Hope in an Unexpected Pregnancy<\/em>. It's just a real honest\/transparent look at what happens to a woman who finds out she's pregnant.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLeslie and her husband are from Alaska. In fact, they live on Kodiak Island in Alaska, and she happens to be the first commercial fisherwoman we have ever interviewed on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>[Laughter] And I\u2019m a little concerned about this. I\u2019m afraid the interview is going to go all to commercial fishing, and we\u2019re going to miss the whole thing about\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Well, I just want to know: \u201cWhat took you guys <em>so long<\/em>?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>There are so many of them available; aren\u2019t there?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>There are. There are.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>She's not just a commercial fisherwoman\u2014she has authored a number of books. She is now the mother of six\u2014not four\u2014and there\u2019s the story. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes, I want to hear about this story\u201443. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHow old was your youngest child, at that time?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>You know, there wasn\u2019t a huge gap\u2014five years. My youngest was five.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, you had four who were\u2014the oldest was\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Twelve.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Twelve, and then\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Okay, something like 12, 10, 8 and 5\u2014something like that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay; and boys and girls?\u00a0 What\u2019s the mix?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>My eldest is a girl and had three boys; and, you know, they were boys. I mean, these are not just boys; okay?\u2014these are <em>Alaskan<\/em> boys.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, at 43, were you thinking, \u201cWe\u2019re probably done\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh, no, I thought that at about 37, [Laughter] right after our last one was born. We had four children in seven years\u2014so, our quiver was <em>full<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And did you do anything to try to prevent any additional pregnancies?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>No\u2014no, we didn\u2019t. We thought about it; and we knew, \u201cOkay, we\u2019ll do that in the future, in a few years from now, but\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>But you felt like you were done.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh, absolutely!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>So, take us to the day when you held that\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014well, that was a few years ago. So, what did you have\u2014a little test strip?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>No, same thing\u2014a little white wand\u2014the pregnancy test stick that comes in those home pregnancy kits. Yes, I was 43. I was\u2014I am teaching, full time, at the University of Alaska. I had four young children\u2014life was crazy but wonderful\u2014it was good. I was stressed at work, and I just wasn\u2019t feeling well. One day, I thought, \u201cWell, I know that I\u2019m not, but I\u2019m going to go get a home pregnancy test just to be sure.\u201d\u00a0 So, you do what you\u2019re supposed to do; and you have to wait a couple of minutes. And in the space of that waiting, I\u2019m just in absolute turmoil, thinking: \u201cThis can\u2019t be. Surely, it isn\u2019t. Lord, please\u2014don\u2019t\u2014please, please no.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd I went back into the bathroom. I looked at that wand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere, in that tiny little window, just the size of your little fingernail, there it was\u2014this little faint line that kept getting darker and darker\u2014and I was pregnant. Another child was on its way, and I cried!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Why \u201cLord, no\u2014please, please no\u201d?\u00a0 I mean, was there not anything in your maternal instinct background, going, \u201cYou know, in a way, maybe this could be a girl \/ maybe\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>No.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>None of that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>No, no; okay?\u00a0 I\u2019m committed to telling the truth here! [Laughter]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Good. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You had shut the door.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>I had shut the door\u2014and that means, <em>mentally<\/em>, I had shut the door \/ spiritually\u2014in every way, I had shut the door.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Emotionally?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes. Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And now, the door is thrown wide open.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>It\u2019s broken open\u2014it\u2019s been kicked down.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Your first response is\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Is just sadness\/despair. And, really, it\u2019s not because I don\u2019t love children. It\u2019s because I love my children\u2014because I know what it takes to be a good mother. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI know <em>all<\/em> that it takes. Pregnancy, and birth, and the coming of another human being\u2014it is, in a way, like a death. You die to yourself, and I had done that four times already.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And you felt like there wasn\u2019t enough left to die.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes. I didn\u2019t know how I could do it again. It wasn\u2019t that I doubted God. It wasn\u2019t that I doubted His supremacy\/His sovereignty\u2014His ability. I doubted <em>myself <\/em>completely. I just felt like, \u201cI don\u2019t know how to do this again.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Had you given your husband any indication that this was even a possibility before you took that pregnancy test?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>My husband had no idea either. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, your reaction is to weep. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But then, you had a gap from there until the time when you had to go to your husband and say, \u201cI have news.\u201d\u00a0 Had your mood changed before you told him?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>No, no. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was really in kind of a panic. I was disbelieving and just in a panic. By the time I told him, I was still in that panic.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Did you call him, or did he come home, or do you remember how\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>He came home, and I told him \/ I gave him the news. Then, we both just\u2014we were just <em>stunned<\/em>. We both just kind of sat down on the couch. We both just kind of sat there for a while, just quiet, just trying to absorb this news. And it was very different\u2014that response was very different from the response to the other four pregnancies. You know\u2014you have to know that. The other times\u2014when I got that test stick and looked at that line, it was just rejoicing, celebrating, praising God. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs I\u2019m looking at that test stick and I\u2019m crying\u2014I\u2019m despairing, and I\u2019m mourning\u2014part of me already felt guilty. Part of me said: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cThis is wrong. You shouldn\u2019t be feeling this. God is a maker of life. He has given you a child and look how you're feeling.\u201d\u00a0 Part of me already felt guilty. I had just found out I was a new mother again and, already, I was a bad mother. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Wow. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I have to think of a husband in that situation\u2014you\u2019ve just told him you\u2019re going to deliver a fifth child. As men, we struggle to identify with our wife\u2019s emotions already. What did he do?\u00a0 You know, when you are elated, you can enter into the elation\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014and the celebration. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>But here is something that\u2019s a downer. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>What\u2019d he do?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And he had his own set of emotions to be processing too. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh, absolutely, he did. And it sounds really strange, but the fact that it hit him as hard as it hit me was actually really helpful. I know couples, where the wife is just sort of in despair, and the husband is <em>thrilled<\/em>\u2014so, he has no\u2014it\u2019s very hard for him to enter into his wife\u2019s emotions, at that point. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut Duncan and I, both, just really struggled with this. We had different sets of concerns, but we were both very concerned about whether\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What were you concerned about?\u00a0 What was he concerned about?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>I was concerned about my own energy and my own ability to <em>love<\/em> another child. I felt so depleted \/ I felt so consumed with my four. I thought, \u201cHow, on earth, is there room?\u2014how is there room, in my heart, for another child?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy husband\u2019s concerns were different than that. He was concerned about the finances\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I\u2019m thinking\u2014men are providers: \u201cSo, how am I going to take care of the financial\u2014this is another college education for somebody; right?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Exactly; that\u2019s right. Yes, my husband was thinking: \u201cHow am I going to do this?\u00a0 How am I going to provide for another child?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Repeatedly, here on our broadcast, we call listeners to look at life\u2019s circumstances through the Scriptures, and what God promises, and what God commands us to do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs human beings, we\u2019ve tried to be real, here, every day. I mean, we tell stories about how we struggle over issues. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd I\u2019m just wanting to know how long it took you, Leslie, to move\u2014from grief, despair, fear, worry, anxiety, self-doubt\u2014to ultimately embrace, by faith, God\u2019s call and God's goodness that He really was a good God and that He would enable you to be able to love that child that He was about to give you. How long did that process take you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>There are really two answers to that. There was part of me\u2014that same day that I looked at the stick, and saw that line, and knew a child was coming\u2014part of me just absolutely dropped to my knees and said: \u201cYou are Lord. You have the right to do with me whatever you choose. I submit to that.\u201d But then, you\u2019re still pregnant. [Laughter] That didn\u2019t take away the pregnancy; you know?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>You still have to walk through this pregnancy. So, there was this 10-month journey ahead\u2014of making it through the pregnancy. That was a moment-by-moment, day-by-day \/ month-by-month journey\u2014step-by-step. And that\u2019s one reason that I wrote this book\u2014is to help women. You go through these sorts of natural stages of pregnancy. At each stage, there are fears and anxieties that visit you, at each particular stage. God met me, of course, because I was seeking Him through each of those stages\u2014and so, there were answers. There were\u2014God did respond. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I really appreciate the way you answered that question because a lot of life\u2019s circumstances do demand both the instant \u201cYes, You are God\u2014I will trust You,\u201d but, then, the ongoing counting of the cost and responding to the outcome, every day, by faith. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And I have to think\u2014not only were you chronicling your own story in this\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014but there was a catharsis that came for you in talking to lots of women. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh my goodness, yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Bob: <\/strong>You wrote this book, in part, to counsel your own heart; didn\u2019t you?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh, I sure did. I started this book during my pregnancy. I was at women\u2019s doors\u2014knocking on women\u2019s doors, interviewing for this book, when my belly was two feet out. [Laughter]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And some of that was to say, \u201cHelp me process this, for myself, as well as for many other women who are going through this.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes, and I think it was really helpful. Many women just opened their hearts and opened their lives to me because they could see, clearly, I am not some outsider here\u2014who is trying to pry open and look inside\u2014\u201cI am with you in this.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes, and I am also thinking of\u2014not merely those who are with you in this story\u2014but I\u2019m thinking of those who aren\u2019t with you because they can\u2019t get pregnant. They are peering, from the outside in, and they are followers of Christ, and they don\u2019t understand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh, I know. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>They don\u2019t understand why any pregnancy couldn\u2019t be immediately embraced.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yet, there are a lot of unplanned pregnancies today where people do go through this; aren\u2019t there?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh, there are\u2014there are. And I do know that, and I am so glad that you\u2019ve included that\u2014just recognition of how many women and men are heart-broken because they don\u2019t have a child. I just know a <em>little bit<\/em> of what that feels like\u2014<em>just a little bit<\/em>. My husband and I were married for ten years before we had children. In the last two years, we started trying to start our family, and \u201cNo.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It wasn\u2019t working. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>It wasn\u2019t working, and we were in infertility testing. We\u2019d been going through the whole test procedures for about a year\u2014more than a year\u2014before we did finally get pregnant. And I know how that felt\u2014to <em>long <\/em>for a child that God does not give you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I know that, many times, when a woman is pregnant, later in life \/ in her 40s\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014those pregnancies can end in miscarriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Did you ever wish that would happen?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>I did; I did. And this is one of the things that complicated everything. I had several books, and I looked up in the book: \u201cOkay, what are the chances of my having a miscarriage?\u201d At my age, there was a 50 percent chance. So, for the first six to eight weeks\u2014ten weeks of the pregnancy\u2014I know that there is a 50 percent chance that this is not going to be a child. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>At your age, half of those pregnancies are terminated, naturally. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>That\u2019s right; that\u2019s right. So, you don\u2019t know whether to emotionally invest in this child or not. So, part of me is wishing and hoping for a miscarriage; but then, part of me says: \u201cWhat?\u00a0 You\u2019re hoping for death?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cYou\u2019re wishing for death?\u201d So, it\u2019s just this terrible mix. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou don\u2019t find the answer until you\u2019re about 12 weeks pregnant. Then, you go to the doctor. At that point, if they can hear a heartbeat, then, there is a 90 percent chance that the pregnancy is good and that the child will develop normally.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, the day you heard the heartbeat, what happened then?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>The day I heard the heartbeat was really a momentous day for me. I want to add to this\u2014that I was teaching, full time, at the university, as well\u2014and dealing with this: \u201cIs this a new child entering our life? Am I about to quit this job or\u2026\u201d I\u2019m just completely in chaos, emotionally and spiritually. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember, very clearly, going to the doctor\u2019s office and feeling like, \u201cOkay, this is the day that I find out.\u201d\u00a0 And I walked in, and the doctor brings out the Doppler\u2014it goes onto your belly. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, it has an amplification thing at the end so everything that\u2019s heard inside is just magnified into the room. The first thing I hear, of course, is my own heartbeat. He's scooting the thing, all around my belly, looking for that other heartbeat. <em>Suddenly<\/em>, there is this sound, and it\u2019s another heartbeat\u2014it\u2019s not like my heartbeat. This heartbeat is going chachachahcha.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh, whoosh.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>It\u2019s going fast\u2014really fast. I realized, now\u2014this is not just a pregnancy \/ this is not just an interruption and a complication to my life\u2014this is a human being. And that was the turning point, for me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Leslie, this is a hard question to ask you because some of our listeners\u2019 heads turned toward the radio when they heard you just say that, yes, you really did, at points, wish for a miscarriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWith 60 percent of all pregnancies being unplanned\u2014most, who choose not to have those children, don\u2019t place those babies in other families for adoption\u2014they choose abortion. Now, you\u2019re a married woman\u2014you have four children. You had some hard conversations with your husband. Did you ever think about that other alternative of abortion?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>You know, to be honest, I did not. Even in the moment of finding out I was pregnant with my fifth child, I did not. But I need to say that\u2014in my sixth and the last pregnancy\u2014after I had just been through this unplanned pregnancy\u2014just thought I had learned all the lessons God had for me\u2014and I\u2019m pregnant again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Two years later.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Two years later. This time I\u2019m 45\u2014almost 45. And looking at that stick, I did have that moment of saying: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cYou know, I could just end this. I don\u2019t have to go through this.\u201d\u00a0 There was a voice that sort of whispered this to me. So, I thought of it\u2014for a few minutes, I thought of it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Because there\u2019s that thought that: \u201cI just don\u2019t think I can do this again at my age.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u201cWith a baby already in the house \/ with the bills already what they are, how do I do this?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>\u201cHow do I do this?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You know, this is tough stuff we\u2019re talking about here; but we\u2019re talking about something that the Psalmist declares\u2014that: \u201cThe fruit of the womb is a reward. Blessed is he whose quiver is full of them.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd I have to read this email that I received from my daughter, Rebecca, because, really, what we're celebrating here is that children are <em>a reward<\/em>. I responded to an email from her, where she was bragging on me, as a daddy. I told her that I loved hearing those words that she\u2019d bragged on me to others and she had bragged on me to me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe wrote me back; and she said: \u201cDad, you are so welcome. I mean every word of what I said. You\u2019re a great dad and Papa. I can\u2019t wait for you to hold our little one. We just had our first ultrasound today. We saw the little heart, beating at a hefty 172 beats per minute\u2014wow!\u00a0 And we heard the heart, too, which was awesome. We are so excited.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, that's what we\u2019re celebrating here\u2014the miracle of how two become one\u2014and they have the privilege, as that great theologian, Erma Bombeck once said, \u201cTo join with God in creating a miracle.\u201d\u00a0 What a privilege.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd, you know, if you know of someone who finds herself with an unplanned pregnancy, I don\u2019t think there's a better book. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, I\u2019m going to be giving this book, I think, to a lot of friends because I think they struggle with this more than we realize.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes, and this is a book that\u2019s written by a fellow traveler\u2014by somebody who has been down the same path\u2014who has had the feelings that you\u2019ve had when you get news like this, and who has turned to the Scriptures to see \u201cHow does God speak to this?\u201d to find the help and the hope you are looking for when you get unexpected news like this. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve got copies of Leslie Fields\u2019 book, <em>Surprise Child: Finding Hope in an Unexpected Pregnancy<\/em>. You can request a copy of the book when you go to FamilyLifeToday.com and click the link in the upper left-hand corner of the screen that says, \u201cGO DEEPER.\u201d\u00a0 Again, you can order from us, online. The website is FamilyLifeToday.com; or if you\u2019d prefer, you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY. You can request a copy of Leslie\u2019s book. We\u2019ll make arrangements to get it sent to you. So, again, the website: FamilyLifeToday.com \/ the toll-free number 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then, the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, what we\u2019ve talked about today is just one of those realities that happens in a family that causes us to say, \u201cOkay, now, how do I respond to what\u2019s going on in my marriage \/ in my family in a way that is going to honor and glorify God and in a way that is going to be consistent with how Christ would have me respond?\u201d What we\u2019re committed to, here at <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, is trying to provide practical biblical help for the kinds of issues that all of us face in our marriages and in our families. And we could not do what we do if it weren\u2019t for listeners, like you, who come alongside and join us in this mission. We\u2019re grateful for the fact that you partner with us to make <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> possible. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI wanted to let you know that, during the month of May, there is a special opportunity for any donation you make to have more impact than normal. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve had some friends of the ministry who have agreed that they will match every donation we receive, during the month of May, on a dollar-for-dollar basis, up to a total of $300,000. We\u2019re excited about this opportunity\u2014we want to take full advantage of it. So, we\u2019re asking listeners: \u201cIf God\u2019s used the ministry of FamilyLife in some way in your life to provide you with help, or encouragement, or hope for your marriage \/ for your family, would you consider making a donation, right now, knowing that that donation is going to be doubled in its impact because of this matching-gift opportunity?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can go to FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link in the upper right-hand corner of the screen that says, \u201cI CARE,\u201d and make an online donation. Or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY. Make your donation over the phone. Or you can mail your donation to us at <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; and our zip code is 72223. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd keep in mind your donation will have double impact when you make it today, thanks to this matching-gift opportunity that\u2019s available to us during the month of May. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd I hope you can join us back tomorrow. We\u2019re going to talk with Leslie Fields about when it dawned on her that when her last child graduated from high school, it would be about time for her to go on social security. We\u2019ll talk about that tomorrow. Hope you can tune in for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2015 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["25.73M"],"filesize_raw":["26981887"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-303483.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-303483.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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Leslie Leyland Fields, a mother of six, talks candidly about her experience of coping with an unplanned pregnancy not once, but twice, many years after she thought her family was complete.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2015-05-07.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Leslie Fields was a 43-year-old mother of four when she unexpectedly found herself pregnant. She was not thrilled with the news, but there came a day in the doctor's office when all that changed. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Sound of a heart beating]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie:<\/strong> The first thing I hear, of course, is my own heartbeat. My heart is beating faster than normal; and he\u2019s scooting the thing all around my belly, looking for that other heartbeat. <em>Suddenly<\/em>, there is this sound; and it <em>filled<\/em> the room. Even though I had been through this so many times before, my eyes just <em>went wide<\/em>. I realize, now\u2014this is not just a pregnancy \/ this is not just an interruption and a complication to my life\u2014this is a human being.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Thursday, May 7<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ll hear today about Leslie Fields\u2019 unplanned late-in-life pregnancy and about how she responded to that news. Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Thursday edition. I had a friend of mine, on staff here, the other day, who\u2014we were in a conversation. He said, \u201cYou know what really annoys me?\u201d\u2014he said, \u201cWhen people ask you about your children; and they say, \u2018Were they planned?\u2019\u201d\u00a0 He says: \u201cI always want to say, \u2018Well, yes; Somebody had a plan for these kids,\u2019\u2014right?\u2014\u2018even if we didn\u2019t. There is a plan.\u2019\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI got to thinking about that\u2014and I thought, \u201cI bet, 100 years ago, people didn't ask the question because we talk about planning your family today in a way that they didn\u2019t talk about it 100 years ago.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe live in a very different era, and people think differently today about having kids; don\u2019t they?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>They do. In fact, it\u2019s been interesting to watch five of our six children marry and watch them begin their own families and talk about <em>planning<\/em> a family. And, you know, as we talk about this subject, Bob, there are a lot of listeners\u2014in fact, we know from research, about 10 percent plan to have a family and can\u2019t get pregnant when they want to. Infertility is a very real deal. As we talk about this today, I want our listeners, who have struggled with infertility, to know we\u2019re sensitive to them and we love them. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd as people have planned pregnancies, they also have unplanned pregnancies. In fact, our guest today, Leslie Fields, had an experience, at the age of 43, after already having four children. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou had an unplanned pregnancy; is that right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>I sure did. That is true.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And she has turned this into a book, <em>Surprise Child: Finding Hope in an Unexpected Pregnancy<\/em>. It's just a real honest\/transparent look at what happens to a woman who finds out she's pregnant.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLeslie and her husband are from Alaska. In fact, they live on Kodiak Island in Alaska, and she happens to be the first commercial fisherwoman we have ever interviewed on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>[Laughter] And I\u2019m a little concerned about this. I\u2019m afraid the interview is going to go all to commercial fishing, and we\u2019re going to miss the whole thing about\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Well, I just want to know: \u201cWhat took you guys <em>so long<\/em>?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>There are so many of them available; aren\u2019t there?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>There are. There are.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>She's not just a commercial fisherwoman\u2014she has authored a number of books. She is now the mother of six\u2014not four\u2014and there\u2019s the story. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes, I want to hear about this story\u201443. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHow old was your youngest child, at that time?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>You know, there wasn\u2019t a huge gap\u2014five years. My youngest was five.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, you had four who were\u2014the oldest was\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Twelve.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Twelve, and then\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Okay, something like 12, 10, 8 and 5\u2014something like that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay; and boys and girls?\u00a0 What\u2019s the mix?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>My eldest is a girl and had three boys; and, you know, they were boys. I mean, these are not just boys; okay?\u2014these are <em>Alaskan<\/em> boys.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, at 43, were you thinking, \u201cWe\u2019re probably done\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh, no, I thought that at about 37, [Laughter] right after our last one was born. We had four children in seven years\u2014so, our quiver was <em>full<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And did you do anything to try to prevent any additional pregnancies?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>No\u2014no, we didn\u2019t. We thought about it; and we knew, \u201cOkay, we\u2019ll do that in the future, in a few years from now, but\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>But you felt like you were done.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh, absolutely!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>So, take us to the day when you held that\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014well, that was a few years ago. So, what did you have\u2014a little test strip?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>No, same thing\u2014a little white wand\u2014the pregnancy test stick that comes in those home pregnancy kits. Yes, I was 43. I was\u2014I am teaching, full time, at the University of Alaska. I had four young children\u2014life was crazy but wonderful\u2014it was good. I was stressed at work, and I just wasn\u2019t feeling well. One day, I thought, \u201cWell, I know that I\u2019m not, but I\u2019m going to go get a home pregnancy test just to be sure.\u201d\u00a0 So, you do what you\u2019re supposed to do; and you have to wait a couple of minutes. And in the space of that waiting, I\u2019m just in absolute turmoil, thinking: \u201cThis can\u2019t be. Surely, it isn\u2019t. Lord, please\u2014don\u2019t\u2014please, please no.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd I went back into the bathroom. I looked at that wand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere, in that tiny little window, just the size of your little fingernail, there it was\u2014this little faint line that kept getting darker and darker\u2014and I was pregnant. Another child was on its way, and I cried!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Why \u201cLord, no\u2014please, please no\u201d?\u00a0 I mean, was there not anything in your maternal instinct background, going, \u201cYou know, in a way, maybe this could be a girl \/ maybe\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>No.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>None of that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>No, no; okay?\u00a0 I\u2019m committed to telling the truth here! [Laughter]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Good. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You had shut the door.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>I had shut the door\u2014and that means, <em>mentally<\/em>, I had shut the door \/ spiritually\u2014in every way, I had shut the door.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Emotionally?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes. Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And now, the door is thrown wide open.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>It\u2019s broken open\u2014it\u2019s been kicked down.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Your first response is\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Is just sadness\/despair. And, really, it\u2019s not because I don\u2019t love children. It\u2019s because I love my children\u2014because I know what it takes to be a good mother. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI know <em>all<\/em> that it takes. Pregnancy, and birth, and the coming of another human being\u2014it is, in a way, like a death. You die to yourself, and I had done that four times already.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And you felt like there wasn\u2019t enough left to die.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes. I didn\u2019t know how I could do it again. It wasn\u2019t that I doubted God. It wasn\u2019t that I doubted His supremacy\/His sovereignty\u2014His ability. I doubted <em>myself <\/em>completely. I just felt like, \u201cI don\u2019t know how to do this again.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Had you given your husband any indication that this was even a possibility before you took that pregnancy test?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>My husband had no idea either. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, your reaction is to weep. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But then, you had a gap from there until the time when you had to go to your husband and say, \u201cI have news.\u201d\u00a0 Had your mood changed before you told him?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>No, no. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was really in kind of a panic. I was disbelieving and just in a panic. By the time I told him, I was still in that panic.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Did you call him, or did he come home, or do you remember how\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>He came home, and I told him \/ I gave him the news. Then, we both just\u2014we were just <em>stunned<\/em>. We both just kind of sat down on the couch. We both just kind of sat there for a while, just quiet, just trying to absorb this news. And it was very different\u2014that response was very different from the response to the other four pregnancies. You know\u2014you have to know that. The other times\u2014when I got that test stick and looked at that line, it was just rejoicing, celebrating, praising God. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs I\u2019m looking at that test stick and I\u2019m crying\u2014I\u2019m despairing, and I\u2019m mourning\u2014part of me already felt guilty. Part of me said: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cThis is wrong. You shouldn\u2019t be feeling this. God is a maker of life. He has given you a child and look how you're feeling.\u201d\u00a0 Part of me already felt guilty. I had just found out I was a new mother again and, already, I was a bad mother. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Wow. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I have to think of a husband in that situation\u2014you\u2019ve just told him you\u2019re going to deliver a fifth child. As men, we struggle to identify with our wife\u2019s emotions already. What did he do?\u00a0 You know, when you are elated, you can enter into the elation\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014and the celebration. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>But here is something that\u2019s a downer. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>What\u2019d he do?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And he had his own set of emotions to be processing too. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh, absolutely, he did. And it sounds really strange, but the fact that it hit him as hard as it hit me was actually really helpful. I know couples, where the wife is just sort of in despair, and the husband is <em>thrilled<\/em>\u2014so, he has no\u2014it\u2019s very hard for him to enter into his wife\u2019s emotions, at that point. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut Duncan and I, both, just really struggled with this. We had different sets of concerns, but we were both very concerned about whether\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What were you concerned about?\u00a0 What was he concerned about?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>I was concerned about my own energy and my own ability to <em>love<\/em> another child. I felt so depleted \/ I felt so consumed with my four. I thought, \u201cHow, on earth, is there room?\u2014how is there room, in my heart, for another child?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy husband\u2019s concerns were different than that. He was concerned about the finances\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I\u2019m thinking\u2014men are providers: \u201cSo, how am I going to take care of the financial\u2014this is another college education for somebody; right?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Exactly; that\u2019s right. Yes, my husband was thinking: \u201cHow am I going to do this?\u00a0 How am I going to provide for another child?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Repeatedly, here on our broadcast, we call listeners to look at life\u2019s circumstances through the Scriptures, and what God promises, and what God commands us to do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs human beings, we\u2019ve tried to be real, here, every day. I mean, we tell stories about how we struggle over issues. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd I\u2019m just wanting to know how long it took you, Leslie, to move\u2014from grief, despair, fear, worry, anxiety, self-doubt\u2014to ultimately embrace, by faith, God\u2019s call and God's goodness that He really was a good God and that He would enable you to be able to love that child that He was about to give you. How long did that process take you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>There are really two answers to that. There was part of me\u2014that same day that I looked at the stick, and saw that line, and knew a child was coming\u2014part of me just absolutely dropped to my knees and said: \u201cYou are Lord. You have the right to do with me whatever you choose. I submit to that.\u201d But then, you\u2019re still pregnant. [Laughter] That didn\u2019t take away the pregnancy; you know?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>You still have to walk through this pregnancy. So, there was this 10-month journey ahead\u2014of making it through the pregnancy. That was a moment-by-moment, day-by-day \/ month-by-month journey\u2014step-by-step. And that\u2019s one reason that I wrote this book\u2014is to help women. You go through these sorts of natural stages of pregnancy. At each stage, there are fears and anxieties that visit you, at each particular stage. God met me, of course, because I was seeking Him through each of those stages\u2014and so, there were answers. There were\u2014God did respond. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I really appreciate the way you answered that question because a lot of life\u2019s circumstances do demand both the instant \u201cYes, You are God\u2014I will trust You,\u201d but, then, the ongoing counting of the cost and responding to the outcome, every day, by faith. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And I have to think\u2014not only were you chronicling your own story in this\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014but there was a catharsis that came for you in talking to lots of women. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh my goodness, yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Bob: <\/strong>You wrote this book, in part, to counsel your own heart; didn\u2019t you?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh, I sure did. I started this book during my pregnancy. I was at women\u2019s doors\u2014knocking on women\u2019s doors, interviewing for this book, when my belly was two feet out. [Laughter]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And some of that was to say, \u201cHelp me process this, for myself, as well as for many other women who are going through this.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes, and I think it was really helpful. Many women just opened their hearts and opened their lives to me because they could see, clearly, I am not some outsider here\u2014who is trying to pry open and look inside\u2014\u201cI am with you in this.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes, and I am also thinking of\u2014not merely those who are with you in this story\u2014but I\u2019m thinking of those who aren\u2019t with you because they can\u2019t get pregnant. They are peering, from the outside in, and they are followers of Christ, and they don\u2019t understand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh, I know. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>They don\u2019t understand why any pregnancy couldn\u2019t be immediately embraced.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yet, there are a lot of unplanned pregnancies today where people do go through this; aren\u2019t there?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Oh, there are\u2014there are. And I do know that, and I am so glad that you\u2019ve included that\u2014just recognition of how many women and men are heart-broken because they don\u2019t have a child. I just know a <em>little bit<\/em> of what that feels like\u2014<em>just a little bit<\/em>. My husband and I were married for ten years before we had children. In the last two years, we started trying to start our family, and \u201cNo.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It wasn\u2019t working. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>It wasn\u2019t working, and we were in infertility testing. We\u2019d been going through the whole test procedures for about a year\u2014more than a year\u2014before we did finally get pregnant. And I know how that felt\u2014to <em>long <\/em>for a child that God does not give you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I know that, many times, when a woman is pregnant, later in life \/ in her 40s\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014those pregnancies can end in miscarriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Did you ever wish that would happen?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>I did; I did. And this is one of the things that complicated everything. I had several books, and I looked up in the book: \u201cOkay, what are the chances of my having a miscarriage?\u201d At my age, there was a 50 percent chance. So, for the first six to eight weeks\u2014ten weeks of the pregnancy\u2014I know that there is a 50 percent chance that this is not going to be a child. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>At your age, half of those pregnancies are terminated, naturally. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>That\u2019s right; that\u2019s right. So, you don\u2019t know whether to emotionally invest in this child or not. So, part of me is wishing and hoping for a miscarriage; but then, part of me says: \u201cWhat?\u00a0 You\u2019re hoping for death?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cYou\u2019re wishing for death?\u201d So, it\u2019s just this terrible mix. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou don\u2019t find the answer until you\u2019re about 12 weeks pregnant. Then, you go to the doctor. At that point, if they can hear a heartbeat, then, there is a 90 percent chance that the pregnancy is good and that the child will develop normally.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, the day you heard the heartbeat, what happened then?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>The day I heard the heartbeat was really a momentous day for me. I want to add to this\u2014that I was teaching, full time, at the university, as well\u2014and dealing with this: \u201cIs this a new child entering our life? Am I about to quit this job or\u2026\u201d I\u2019m just completely in chaos, emotionally and spiritually. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember, very clearly, going to the doctor\u2019s office and feeling like, \u201cOkay, this is the day that I find out.\u201d\u00a0 And I walked in, and the doctor brings out the Doppler\u2014it goes onto your belly. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, it has an amplification thing at the end so everything that\u2019s heard inside is just magnified into the room. The first thing I hear, of course, is my own heartbeat. He's scooting the thing, all around my belly, looking for that other heartbeat. <em>Suddenly<\/em>, there is this sound, and it\u2019s another heartbeat\u2014it\u2019s not like my heartbeat. This heartbeat is going chachachahcha.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh, whoosh.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>It\u2019s going fast\u2014really fast. I realized, now\u2014this is not just a pregnancy \/ this is not just an interruption and a complication to my life\u2014this is a human being. And that was the turning point, for me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Leslie, this is a hard question to ask you because some of our listeners\u2019 heads turned toward the radio when they heard you just say that, yes, you really did, at points, wish for a miscarriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWith 60 percent of all pregnancies being unplanned\u2014most, who choose not to have those children, don\u2019t place those babies in other families for adoption\u2014they choose abortion. Now, you\u2019re a married woman\u2014you have four children. You had some hard conversations with your husband. Did you ever think about that other alternative of abortion?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>You know, to be honest, I did not. Even in the moment of finding out I was pregnant with my fifth child, I did not. But I need to say that\u2014in my sixth and the last pregnancy\u2014after I had just been through this unplanned pregnancy\u2014just thought I had learned all the lessons God had for me\u2014and I\u2019m pregnant again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Two years later.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Two years later. This time I\u2019m 45\u2014almost 45. And looking at that stick, I did have that moment of saying: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cYou know, I could just end this. I don\u2019t have to go through this.\u201d\u00a0 There was a voice that sort of whispered this to me. So, I thought of it\u2014for a few minutes, I thought of it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Because there\u2019s that thought that: \u201cI just don\u2019t think I can do this again at my age.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u201cWith a baby already in the house \/ with the bills already what they are, how do I do this?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Leslie: <\/strong>\u201cHow do I do this?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You know, this is tough stuff we\u2019re talking about here; but we\u2019re talking about something that the Psalmist declares\u2014that: \u201cThe fruit of the womb is a reward. Blessed is he whose quiver is full of them.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd I have to read this email that I received from my daughter, Rebecca, because, really, what we're celebrating here is that children are <em>a reward<\/em>. I responded to an email from her, where she was bragging on me, as a daddy. I told her that I loved hearing those words that she\u2019d bragged on me to others and she had bragged on me to me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe wrote me back; and she said: \u201cDad, you are so welcome. I mean every word of what I said. You\u2019re a great dad and Papa. I can\u2019t wait for you to hold our little one. We just had our first ultrasound today. We saw the little heart, beating at a hefty 172 beats per minute\u2014wow!\u00a0 And we heard the heart, too, which was awesome. We are so excited.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, that's what we\u2019re celebrating here\u2014the miracle of how two become one\u2014and they have the privilege, as that great theologian, Erma Bombeck once said, \u201cTo join with God in creating a miracle.\u201d\u00a0 What a privilege.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd, you know, if you know of someone who finds herself with an unplanned pregnancy, I don\u2019t think there's a better book. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, I\u2019m going to be giving this book, I think, to a lot of friends because I think they struggle with this more than we realize.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes, and this is a book that\u2019s written by a fellow traveler\u2014by somebody who has been down the same path\u2014who has had the feelings that you\u2019ve had when you get news like this, and who has turned to the Scriptures to see \u201cHow does God speak to this?\u201d to find the help and the hope you are looking for when you get unexpected news like this. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve got copies of Leslie Fields\u2019 book, <em>Surprise Child: Finding Hope in an Unexpected Pregnancy<\/em>. You can request a copy of the book when you go to FamilyLifeToday.com and click the link in the upper left-hand corner of the screen that says, \u201cGO DEEPER.\u201d\u00a0 Again, you can order from us, online. The website is FamilyLifeToday.com; or if you\u2019d prefer, you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY. You can request a copy of Leslie\u2019s book. We\u2019ll make arrangements to get it sent to you. So, again, the website: FamilyLifeToday.com \/ the toll-free number 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then, the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, what we\u2019ve talked about today is just one of those realities that happens in a family that causes us to say, \u201cOkay, now, how do I respond to what\u2019s going on in my marriage \/ in my family in a way that is going to honor and glorify God and in a way that is going to be consistent with how Christ would have me respond?\u201d What we\u2019re committed to, here at <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, is trying to provide practical biblical help for the kinds of issues that all of us face in our marriages and in our families. And we could not do what we do if it weren\u2019t for listeners, like you, who come alongside and join us in this mission. We\u2019re grateful for the fact that you partner with us to make <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> possible. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI wanted to let you know that, during the month of May, there is a special opportunity for any donation you make to have more impact than normal. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve had some friends of the ministry who have agreed that they will match every donation we receive, during the month of May, on a dollar-for-dollar basis, up to a total of $300,000. We\u2019re excited about this opportunity\u2014we want to take full advantage of it. So, we\u2019re asking listeners: \u201cIf God\u2019s used the ministry of FamilyLife in some way in your life to provide you with help, or encouragement, or hope for your marriage \/ for your family, would you consider making a donation, right now, knowing that that donation is going to be doubled in its impact because of this matching-gift opportunity?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can go to FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link in the upper right-hand corner of the screen that says, \u201cI CARE,\u201d and make an online donation. Or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY. Make your donation over the phone. Or you can mail your donation to us at <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; and our zip code is 72223. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd keep in mind your donation will have double impact when you make it today, thanks to this matching-gift opportunity that\u2019s available to us during the month of May. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd I hope you can join us back tomorrow. We\u2019re going to talk with Leslie Fields about when it dawned on her that when her last child graduated from high school, it would be about time for her to go on social security. We\u2019ll talk about that tomorrow. Hope you can tune in for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2015 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/303483","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=303483"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=303483"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=303483"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=303483"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=303483"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=303483"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=303483"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}