{"id":303217,"date":"2014-10-03T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2014-10-03T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/focusing-on-christ\/"},"modified":"2014-10-03T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2014-10-03T15:00:00","slug":"focusing-on-christ","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/focusing-on-christ\/","title":{"rendered":"Focusing on Christ"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Mother-daughter team Catherine Strode Parks and Linda Strode encourages couples to be intentional about their marriages, beginning with the wedding.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2014-10-03.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"26.3M","filesize_raw":"27572849","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2807],"tags":[4294,4159,4861,5454,5453,4207],"podcast_series":[7196],"cwp_profile":[3164,8817],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-303217","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-engagements-and-weddings","tag-family","tag-gospel","tag-in-laws","tag-meaningful","tag-mother-daughter-relationship","tag-wedding","podcast_series-a-christ-centered-wedding","cwp_profile-catherine-strode-parks","cwp_profile-linda-strode","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/303217\/focusing-on-christ","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/303217\/focusing-on-christ","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"FmwWQzvuE4\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/focusing-on-christ\/\">Focusing on Christ<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/focusing-on-christ\/embed\/#?secret=FmwWQzvuE4\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Focusing on Christ&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"FmwWQzvuE4\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2014-10-03.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2014-10-03.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Linda Strode is a mom who was involved in helping to plan her daughter\u2019s wedding. So, if she was sitting down with a mom and a daughter, what advice would she have for both of them?\u2014for a mom, first?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>I think a mother has to remember it is <em>not<\/em> her wedding\u2014it\u2019s her daughter\u2019s wedding. Again, I think it\u2019s about serving. I love serving my children. To daughters, I think just being open to their mother\u2019s counsel because older women have been there\u2014we have seen things\u2014we kind of know what works and what doesn\u2019t work\u2014asking their mother for prayer\u2014to me, as a mother, that\u2019s a <em>delight<\/em> when my children ask me to pray for them specifically for things. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Friday, October 3<sup>rd<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We\u2019ll talk more with Linda Strode and to Catherine Parks about how to plan a Christ-centered wedding. Stay tuned. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Bob, we\u2019re going to do something that\u2014this is historic. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It is historic. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>In all of the broadcasting on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, you have given credit to Keith Lynch\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I have. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014all these years. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I\u2019m going to go be the engineer, and Keith\u2019s going to come and take my place. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And folks weren\u2019t here a few moments ago\u2014but Keith\u2014Keith came into the studio\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Come on, Keith. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014and corrected Bob about something we left out of an earlier broadcast. Are you ladies in agreement?\u00a0 Isn\u2019t that what happened?\u00a0 <br>\u00a0\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Oh, absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And I\u2019ll introduce our guests before our engineer becomes the co-host of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Catherine Strode Parks and Linda Strode, her mom, join us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. They are the authors of <em>A Christ-Centered Wedding<\/em>. Ladies, welcome back to the broadcast. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Thank you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Thank you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Good to be here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes, it\u2019s good to have you back.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd you kind of heard what happened. Keith stuck his head in\u2014and he didn\u2019t rebuke Bob but he offered\u2014come on, Keith, and have a seat in Bob\u2019s chair. Have a seat there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Can\u2019t I just stand?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>No. [Laughter]\u00a0 He offered an observation as to why we\u2019ve lost, maybe, the gospel-centered nature of the wedding in the Christian community today. And Keith\u2014you said to Bob?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>I just said that a wedding ceremony is a rite of the church. Every church has a liturgy. That sounds like a fancy word, but liturgy is just a work of the people. When people started, in my opinion\u2014when people started inventing their own language of the ceremony, it\u2014in some cases, it took away from the beauty or the theological solidity of that service\u2014and it just kind of crept in. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And the church needs to be the origin of\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014the marriage and family unit because it was our God who created it in the first place. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>That\u2019s exactly right. And people forget that\u2014which is what you ladies were talking about\u2014which I thought was really powerful. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Well, I agree with that. We\u2019ve talked about how you will find all kinds of things like people make a vow\u2014\u201cI promise to peel your clementines.\u201d\u00a0 That is actually in vows today. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Wow. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>What are some others you\u2019ve been\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Is that a\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>It\u2019s an orange. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Like a mandarin orange. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I was thinking it was. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u201cI promise to peel your\u2014\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Well, I think it\u2019s just inserting a little bit of your personality\u2014but when that\u2019s the basis of your vows\u2014or you will go to some weddings, and there is no vow even made \/ it\u2019s a declaration of love. The vows become: \u201cYou are my everything. You are this. You are that. I love you.\u201d\u00a0 But there is no promise actually made. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe talk to some pastors who\u2014they don\u2019t allow couples to write their own vows at all\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Catherine: <\/strong>\u2014because they believe that using the vows from the <em>Book of Common Prayer<\/em>\u2014and I did a lot of research into that\u2014and those words were chosen painstakingly. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Very. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>They were argued about for a long time\u2014little words inserted \/ little words taken out. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>And we, for some reason, have decided that we can throw those out completely and just decide what marriage is ourselves. But when you say, \u201cThese are the vows,\u201d\u2014and they are the same ones that people have been saying for hundreds of years\u2014there is this commonality to marriage. And it\u2019s this camaraderie that: \u201cYou said those vows \/ I said those vows. Our marriage means the same thing.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Keith: <\/strong>And they\u2019ve been\u2014and those vows have been vetted. They\u2019re vetted\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Keith: <\/strong>\u2014by people. We don\u2019t think of the pastor as a professional, but you\u2019re married to a pastor. He\u2019s a professional at that, and there\u2019s a reason for that. It\u2019s not just a\u2014it isn\u2019t just a word people say. It\u2019s just like having a non-professional, here at this microphone. So, I\u2019m going to say, \u201c<em>Bob<\/em>, come back!\u201d\u00a0 [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Nice segue. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Which button do I push\u2014which one of these buttons do I push to make the recording go and stuff?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Any of them!\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You just stay out there Bob. We\u2019re doing just fine in here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Come back, Bob!\u00a0 [Pleading]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Come on back, Bob. You know, here is the thing I want our listeners to hear\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014we have deep bench strength, here at\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Nice. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. I mean, this is our engineer\u2014he <em>flawlessly\/<\/em>completely took over from Bob\u2019s job. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>No. It was kind of mediocre, I thought. [Laughter]\u00a0 I was listening out there. I mean, he had some good things to say; but it was kind of monotone. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Tomorrow, on the broadcast, Tonda Nations is going to be sitting in the chair! She\u2019s going\u2014[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Our researcher is going to step in for that. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut I think you guys were making a great point about the fact that the wedding ceremony should have some elements. So, if you are sitting down with a young couple\u2014and they are starry-eyed and they are thinking about the colors for bridesmaids\u2019 dresses, and they are thinking about whether they\u2019re going to have candles, or they\u2019re going to have flowers, and the photography\u2014you say all of that is fine\u2014but, if you are going to coach them: \u201cMake sure you don\u2019t forget this, and this, and this.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhere would you point them?\u00a0 <br>\u00a0\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And I would just jump in here and say, \u201cBefore you have a word about the rehearsal dinner, the wedding, or the reception, you, first of all, need to talk about how you\u2019re going to take a marriage license and turn it into a marriage.\u201d\u00a0 That means you need to have good biblical preparation. That\u2019s what FamilyLife has been up to since our very beginning. This ministry started as a marriage preparation ministry to equip singles in the most sacred commitment two human beings make to one another. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd I\u2019m not diminishing the ceremony in <em>any <\/em>way. I just want to say to any couple, thinking about answering your question, Bob, \u201cThe place you start is at the main thing\u2014making the main thing the <em>main thing<\/em>.\u201d\u00a0 [Laughter]\u00a0 You\u2019re about to get married for goodness sakes, and you need to make sure you are prepared. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, you being, Catherine, a pastor\u2019s daughter\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014your dad, undoubtedly lined you up to go through all kinds of great marriage preparation courses and classes\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Sent you to the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> and stuff like that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014sent you to that. You were totally skilled and ready when you got married; right?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Let\u2019s just say\u2014God is gracious. [Laughter]\u00a0 You know, I\u2014we had a few conversations\u2014but my husband and I did not have any, really, any premarital counseling, going in. I think some of that was logistical\u2014we were living in different places. We didn\u2019t have a home church \/ I was still in college. We were kind of all over the place, at the time; but that would be one big regret. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHonestly, my husband sat down with my dad to ask for my hand in marriage. This wasn\u2019t exactly premarital counseling; but I think he fulfilled a little bit of the role that a pastor would do in doing that. He asked my husband 45-minutes worth of questions. My husband was thinking a quick \u201cYes\u201d or \u201cNo\u201d; you know?\u00a0 \u201cLet\u2019s get the answer and move on with it.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe asked him all sorts of very difficult questions. He said, \u201cHow are you going to handle Catherine\u2019s strong will and her stubbornness?\u201d\u00a0 This is what he said\u2014I would not claim those things for myself\u2014but my husband had no idea, at the time. We weren\u2019t engaged yet. He didn\u2019t\u2014I\u2019d kind of been putting my best foot forward for so long, and he didn\u2019t know that I was like that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd he found out, when he asked me to marry him, through a whole series of events, that I was, in fact, quite stubborn. Thankfully, he knew kind of ahead of time. He had already thought through\u2014and so, I think that\u2019s the role that premarital counseling serves in some ways\u2014and marriage counseling, in general, is saying: \u201cThese are the areas that you both need grace,\u201d and \u201cHow are you going to work through those things?\u201d and \u201cWhat does the Bible say about that?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, and of course, we do recommend that couples\u2014if they can\u2014get to a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>There are breakout sessions at the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> designed specifically for pre-married couples. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And if you know someone who is getting married in the next 12 months\u2014I know this is a little more on the expensive side, in terms of a wedding gift\u2014but I\u2019m going to promise you something\u2014out of giving them toasters, dishes, silverware, a vacuum cleaner\u2014all the things that young couples need when they start their marriage\u2014I don\u2019t think there is going to be a gift they receive\u2014if you give them a certificate to go to the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>\u2014you\u2019re going to give them the best wedding gift they are going to get. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, I could introduce you to a couple, right now\u2014we could pick up the phone. We won\u2019t do it, but they got married in 1986. They had been given the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> as a wedding gift by a friend. Both came from families that pretty much were set\u2014so, it wasn\u2019t a matter of them needing a lot to get married. And they both would look back today and say: \u201cYou know what? That gift changed the course of their lives, their marriage, their family, their legacy, their ministry.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, it got them thinking, not about the wedding\u2014it got them thinking about the marriage. And that\u2019s part of what premarital counseling ought to have you doing\u2014not thinking so much about \u201cWhat\u2019s the one-hour ceremony going to be?\u201d but thinking about\u00a0 \u201cWhat\u2019s the 50-year marriage going to be?\u201d because that\u2019s really the big issue. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut Linda, I\u2019ve got to turn to you and say\u2014you\u2019re sitting down with a young couple\u2014they are saying: \u201cWe want to get married. We do want to make sure our ceremony honors Christ.\u201d\u00a0 Apart from the whole issue of vows\u2014and I loved what you were saying, Catherine, about you don\u2019t just make declarations of love \/ you make some promises to one another. Apart from that, what needs to be a part of that day \/ that ceremony?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>If I was counseling a couple today, I would say, \u201cFirst of all\u2014the two of you\u2014sit down and talk about that day and pray, pray, pray about that day. Make sure that <em>you\u2019re<\/em> united in what you want about this. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEven before you sit down and talk to your parents, and you get other sides of the family, pray about what is most important to the two of you and make sure it\u2019s not about <em>you<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so performance-based, as a society. We want to wow people. You have this desire to make it \u201call about us.\u201d Young Christian couples can be pulled into that so quickly\u2014the very same thing\u2014but just \u201cHow can we make it not about us?\u201d\u00a0 You know, we taught our children the acrostic when they were young about J-O-Y: \u201cJesus, Others, Yourself.\u201d\u00a0 You know, it\u2019s about Jesus\u2014and then, it\u2019s about serving those guests that come: \u201cHow are you going to serve them?\u00a0 How are you going to treat them?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Now, what do you mean?\u00a0 That just sounds weird\u2014a wedding is about the bride. It\u2019s about\u2014it\u2019s <em>her <\/em>day. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Serving the guests who come\u2014what do you mean?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Well, I want to just put in a plug for what she\u2019s saying. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think weddings are a great thing for married people to attend because it does give you a moment to reflect\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014upon what you promised because, when you got married, you were\u2014your brainwaves were flat, at that point. You were numbed over by all the activity and all of what was taking place. So, it takes going to somebody else\u2019s wedding\u2014you\u2019re nodding your head, Catherine, because\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You kind of re-up every time you go; don\u2019t you?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You really do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And you\u2019re reminded of what two people pledge and promise one another\u2014and it\u2019s more than just staying married. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Absolutely, I mean, I think so many people said to me, \u201cYou won\u2019t remember anything about your wedding.\u201d That was one thing I specifically prayed for, leading up to it\u2014is that I could really be present \/ remember what was being said, and take it all in. But there is a limit to that. I think that\u2019s the joy of attending a wedding and being a witness to it. I think it\u2019s for married couples. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think, also, part of what Mom is saying in serving others\u2014one group that we do a really poor job of serving is single people in our weddings. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have friends that <em>hate<\/em> going to weddings because it\u2019s either difficult\u2014just to watch someone getting married\u2014or it\u2019s difficult\u2014someone is going to throw the bouquet. The bride throws the bouquet, and everyone pushes you out there in the middle. I think people are well-meaning in that, but it\u2019s a very uncomfortable thing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Because, as a single person, this may be your 43<sup>rd<\/sup> wedding\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014you\u2019ve attended from all of your acquaintances and friends. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Yes. And you are <em>happy<\/em> for those people, but you don\u2019t want to be shoved out there, as an example\u2014as if you are not whole\u2014you need something\u00a0 \/ you\u2019re lacking something.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, how can we serve our single friends who are coming to a wedding?\u00a0 What would you suggest?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Yes, I think there are some practical ways. First of all, I would toss out the bouquet toss, honestly\u2014I would get rid of that. I don\u2019t think it serves anyone, and there are some really creative ideas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne person did the bouquet toss, but they invited everyone\u2014married\/single, men\/women\u2014to all come out. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey had done a bouquet that had movie gift cards, and candy, and different\u2014you know, Starbucks gift cards\u2014something like that. They wanted it just to be a way of thanking the people that came in a really fun thing. They said their photographer actually said that was the best bouquet picture he\u2019s ever gotten because everyone actually wanted to be out there\u2014and they were all very excited about it. [Laughter]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think some of it is just\u2014when you look at your wedding as the body of Christ coming around you\u2014you look at it as mutual service \/ mutual dedication to the work that the Lord is doing. So, just being intentional\u2014I mean, that may just be the bride talking to her friends or making sure that every conversation she has with her friends, leading up to the wedding, is not about the wedding. No one wants their relationship to completely change and just be so wedding-centric. I think it\u2019s just\u2014you can think creatively, but you can also just pray for ways to serve that person. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think the Lord is faithful to do that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Let\u2019s talk about mother\/daughter relationships in the days that lead up to the wedding\u2014maybe the months. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Bob: <\/strong>What\u2019s there to talk about there?\u00a0 [Laughter]\u00a0 It\u2019s all smooth, sweet\u2014\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You know\u2014yes, for a dad\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014in case he has a Geiger counter and can detect the radioactive fallout from the atomic bombs that go off. Linda, talk about what\u2019s the best counsel you can give a young lady who is getting ready to get married as she relates to her mom in planning the wedding. And then, I\u2019m coming back to you, Catherine. I\u2019m going to let you\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Oh, boy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014coach the moms. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>That\u2019s a really good question. Catherine and I did not have problems in the wedding process\u2014the planning. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>\u2014which is a miracle. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>It really is. We have problems over giving <em>directions<\/em> when we drive!\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You\u2019re stubborn. Who did you get that from?\u2014your dad?\u00a0 [Laughter]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>It\u2019s this one, right here!\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>It\u2019s probably this one. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>At least, you were stubborn about the same things. You were stubborn in the same direction when you were getting married. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>I would like to give advice to the mothers, actually\u2014first, it\u2019s not your wedding. I think a mother has to remember it is <em>not<\/em> her wedding\u2014it\u2019s her daughter\u2019s wedding. So, I think\u2014I\u2019ll say that first to mothers. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTo daughters, I think just being open to their mother\u2019s counsel, asking their mothers for prayer. Asking your mother to be your prayer warrior would be <em>huge<\/em>. You know, to me, as a mother, that\u2019s a <em>delight <\/em>when my children ask me to pray for them specifically for things. But just being willing to listen to your mother\u2019s counsel, I think, is so important because older women have been there\u2014we\u2019ve seen things\u2014we kind of know what works and what doesn\u2019t work. And so, those are just kind of basic. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Could I add one in there?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I\u2019d encourage daughters to say to their mom, \u201cYou know, Mom, when it gets tough, let\u2019s develop the ability to laugh,\u201d because there is something about a wedding that exhausts you. Small things become big things, and big things get blown into gargantuan things. Then, before long, you\u2019re irritated, or angry, or bitter, or resentful about something that doesn\u2019t matter\u2014it\u2019s not going to matter ten years from today. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>It\u2019s really interesting you saying that. We felt like we had done everything that we were supposed to do for the wedding\u2014all the checklists were done. So, we get to the church the day of the wedding. Everything is in place, and the bakery comes in with the wedding cake. It was\u2014wedding cake is <em>huge<\/em>. If you ever saw <em>Father of the Bride<\/em>\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Oh, yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>\u2014you know it\u2019s all about the cake. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>So, they\u2014it was supposed to be this white cake with white scroll lacework on it. It was supposed to be on a small board so it could sit on this silver piece. Well, it comes in\u2014it\u2019s white, but it has chocolate scroll work all over it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>That\u2019s perfect\u2014that\u2019s perfect. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I think it sounds perfect to me too!\u00a0 [Laughter]\u00a0 Somebody vetoed you\u2014made the right call, I would say. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>And it\u2019s on this <em>huge<\/em> wooden board. I\u2019m like: \u201c<em>Okay<\/em>. That\u2019s all right. God has a plan for this too.\u201d The florist happened to have enough flowers to put around the base of it\u2014it all worked. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And Catherine, what did you think?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>You know what?\u00a0 I had\u2014one of my bridesmaids was a missionary kid. She was standing next to me when they brought the cake in. There\u2019s just a little bit of perspective for you\u2014she grew up in the Philippians\u2014and if I complained about that cake, she would have been all over me because\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes, that is what we call a first-world problem; right?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Exactly. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Exactly. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Your mom gave advice both to the mother of the bride and to the bride. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Sorry. [Laughter]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, you get an opportunity\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>You know what I\u2019m dealing with here, now! [Laughter]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I\u2019ll tell you what\u2014you\u2019ll get an opportunity to do the <em>same<\/em> thing. You can both coach the mother of the bride and the bride. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBefore you do that, though, let me tell our listeners how they can get a copy of the book the two of you have written. It\u2019s called <em>A Christ-Centered Wedding: Rejoicing in the Gospel on Your Big Day<\/em>. We have copies in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link at the top of the page that says, \u201cGO DEEPER.\u201d\u00a0 That\u2019ll take you right to where you can find information about how to order a copy of the book from us. Or you can call to order\u20141-800-FL-TODAY. Once again, the title of the book is <em>A Christ-Centered Wedding<\/em>. Order, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then, the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhile we\u2019re talking about saying, \u201cI do,\u201d we should mention that tomorrow, in Washington, DC, and in a couple hundred churches, all around the world, we\u2019re going to have a lot of couples standing up and saying, \u201cI still do,\u201d as we host our third <em>I Still Do<\/em><em><sup>\u2122<\/sup><\/em> one-day event for couples\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014this time at the Verizon Center in Washington, DC\u2014and, as I mentioned, in hundreds of churches, around the country and around the world. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to say, \u201cThank you,\u201d to the folks who support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. We are a non-profit organization. So, the events that we do, and this radio program, the resources we create\u2014all of those are made possible because of financial support we receive from folks, like you, who believe that what we are doing is important. And we\u2019re very grateful for you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you can help with a donation today, we\u2019d like to say a special \u201cThank you,\u201d by sending you a 2015 calendar. It\u2019s the Spirit-Filled Year calendar. It focuses on the fruit of the Spirit and how that can be a part of your marriage and your family. It\u2019s our thank-you gift when you go, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link in the upper right-hand corner of the homepage that says, \u201cI Care,\u201d and make an online donation. Or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and make a donation over the phone. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAsk for the calendar when you get in touch with us. Or you can write a note\u2014send a donation to our mailing address. It\u2019s Post Office Box 7111, Little Rock, AR. And the zip code is 72223. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Well, we\u2019ve had a good time. You ladies had a good time joining us on the broadcast?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Oh, absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This has been fun. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It\u2019s been fun. Catherine Strode Parks has joined us, along with her mom, Linda. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBefore Bob explained how they could get a copy of your book, which I really want to commend to listeners as well\u2014<em>A Christ-Centered Wedding<\/em>\u2014Bob had asked you, Catherine, to do what your mom did\u2014which is not answer my question which is\u2014but go ahead and speak to both groups\u2014both to the bride, who is getting married, and to the mother of the bride. Just give them some coaching as they move forward. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>I think\u2014to both, I would really commend reading through parts of the book of Colossians. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think the idea of our unity and our identity in Christ is so key there\u2014and knowing the things that we\u2019ve put off and the things that we\u2019re putting on. And some of those things\u2014humility, and kindness, and love\u2014and if both the mother and the daughter are believers, then, those are the things that should characterize our interactions. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>So, I think to the bride, I would say: \u201cFocus on what\u2019s really important and be willing to let things go that aren\u2019t. And then, give some things to your mom and ask her: \u2018I respect you. I love your vision for these things. Could you take care of this?\u2019 Giving her some responsibility shows that you love her, and you trust her, and you value that relationship.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That\u2019s good advice. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It is. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And Linda, for you, you only had one daughter to have one wedding with; right?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And for a lot of moms, that\u2019s a big deal\u2014it\u2019s a once-in-a-lifetime event.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>It is. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But the mom\u2019s got to recognize it\u2019s not your day. It\u2019s not even her day; is it?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>No, it is not her day either. That\u2019s\u2014when I go back and look at planning Catherine\u2019s wedding\u2014it was a beautiful Christ-centered wedding\u2014but I feel like I missed an opportunity, as a mom, to be more intentional in the time with my daughter and more time that we could have spent praying together. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd really there are some things\u2014we would go back \/ she and Eric would go back\u2014and change in their wedding to make it, not so much just a ceremony, but go back to make it a <em>worship<\/em> service\u2014and to involve the people there more in the worship, whether it\u2019s a congregational singing\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I\u2019ll jump in here. I attended a wedding here recently\u2014a good friend of mine, Michael and Cindy Easley\u2014their daughter got married in Nashville. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt the end of the wedding, they called the family members\u2014all the family members up to gather around the couple. As there were some songs being sung, they laid hands and gathered around that couple and prayed for them. It was powerful because it symbolized two families coming together, around this couple starting out\u2014and, again, forging that marriage covenant\u2014but doing it under the authority of God and asking Him to bless that couple. It was a <em>powerful<\/em> statement. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong><em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2014 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["26.3M"],"filesize_raw":["27572849"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-303217.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-303217.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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team Catherine Strode Parks and Linda Strode encourages couples to be intentional about their marriages, beginning with the wedding.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2014-10-03.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Linda Strode is a mom who was involved in helping to plan her daughter\u2019s wedding. So, if she was sitting down with a mom and a daughter, what advice would she have for both of them?\u2014for a mom, first?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>I think a mother has to remember it is <em>not<\/em> her wedding\u2014it\u2019s her daughter\u2019s wedding. Again, I think it\u2019s about serving. I love serving my children. To daughters, I think just being open to their mother\u2019s counsel because older women have been there\u2014we have seen things\u2014we kind of know what works and what doesn\u2019t work\u2014asking their mother for prayer\u2014to me, as a mother, that\u2019s a <em>delight<\/em> when my children ask me to pray for them specifically for things. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Friday, October 3<sup>rd<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We\u2019ll talk more with Linda Strode and to Catherine Parks about how to plan a Christ-centered wedding. Stay tuned. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Bob, we\u2019re going to do something that\u2014this is historic. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It is historic. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>In all of the broadcasting on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, you have given credit to Keith Lynch\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I have. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014all these years. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I\u2019m going to go be the engineer, and Keith\u2019s going to come and take my place. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And folks weren\u2019t here a few moments ago\u2014but Keith\u2014Keith came into the studio\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Come on, Keith. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014and corrected Bob about something we left out of an earlier broadcast. Are you ladies in agreement?\u00a0 Isn\u2019t that what happened?\u00a0 <br>\u00a0\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Oh, absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And I\u2019ll introduce our guests before our engineer becomes the co-host of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Catherine Strode Parks and Linda Strode, her mom, join us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. They are the authors of <em>A Christ-Centered Wedding<\/em>. Ladies, welcome back to the broadcast. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Thank you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Thank you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Good to be here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes, it\u2019s good to have you back.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd you kind of heard what happened. Keith stuck his head in\u2014and he didn\u2019t rebuke Bob but he offered\u2014come on, Keith, and have a seat in Bob\u2019s chair. Have a seat there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Can\u2019t I just stand?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>No. [Laughter]\u00a0 He offered an observation as to why we\u2019ve lost, maybe, the gospel-centered nature of the wedding in the Christian community today. And Keith\u2014you said to Bob?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>I just said that a wedding ceremony is a rite of the church. Every church has a liturgy. That sounds like a fancy word, but liturgy is just a work of the people. When people started, in my opinion\u2014when people started inventing their own language of the ceremony, it\u2014in some cases, it took away from the beauty or the theological solidity of that service\u2014and it just kind of crept in. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And the church needs to be the origin of\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014the marriage and family unit because it was our God who created it in the first place. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>That\u2019s exactly right. And people forget that\u2014which is what you ladies were talking about\u2014which I thought was really powerful. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Well, I agree with that. We\u2019ve talked about how you will find all kinds of things like people make a vow\u2014\u201cI promise to peel your clementines.\u201d\u00a0 That is actually in vows today. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Wow. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>What are some others you\u2019ve been\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Is that a\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>It\u2019s an orange. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Like a mandarin orange. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I was thinking it was. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u201cI promise to peel your\u2014\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Well, I think it\u2019s just inserting a little bit of your personality\u2014but when that\u2019s the basis of your vows\u2014or you will go to some weddings, and there is no vow even made \/ it\u2019s a declaration of love. The vows become: \u201cYou are my everything. You are this. You are that. I love you.\u201d\u00a0 But there is no promise actually made. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe talk to some pastors who\u2014they don\u2019t allow couples to write their own vows at all\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Catherine: <\/strong>\u2014because they believe that using the vows from the <em>Book of Common Prayer<\/em>\u2014and I did a lot of research into that\u2014and those words were chosen painstakingly. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Very. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>They were argued about for a long time\u2014little words inserted \/ little words taken out. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>And we, for some reason, have decided that we can throw those out completely and just decide what marriage is ourselves. But when you say, \u201cThese are the vows,\u201d\u2014and they are the same ones that people have been saying for hundreds of years\u2014there is this commonality to marriage. And it\u2019s this camaraderie that: \u201cYou said those vows \/ I said those vows. Our marriage means the same thing.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Keith: <\/strong>And they\u2019ve been\u2014and those vows have been vetted. They\u2019re vetted\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Keith: <\/strong>\u2014by people. We don\u2019t think of the pastor as a professional, but you\u2019re married to a pastor. He\u2019s a professional at that, and there\u2019s a reason for that. It\u2019s not just a\u2014it isn\u2019t just a word people say. It\u2019s just like having a non-professional, here at this microphone. So, I\u2019m going to say, \u201c<em>Bob<\/em>, come back!\u201d\u00a0 [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Nice segue. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Which button do I push\u2014which one of these buttons do I push to make the recording go and stuff?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Any of them!\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You just stay out there Bob. We\u2019re doing just fine in here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Keith: <\/strong>Come back, Bob!\u00a0 [Pleading]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Come on back, Bob. You know, here is the thing I want our listeners to hear\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014we have deep bench strength, here at\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Nice. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. I mean, this is our engineer\u2014he <em>flawlessly\/<\/em>completely took over from Bob\u2019s job. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>No. It was kind of mediocre, I thought. [Laughter]\u00a0 I was listening out there. I mean, he had some good things to say; but it was kind of monotone. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Tomorrow, on the broadcast, Tonda Nations is going to be sitting in the chair! She\u2019s going\u2014[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Our researcher is going to step in for that. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut I think you guys were making a great point about the fact that the wedding ceremony should have some elements. So, if you are sitting down with a young couple\u2014and they are starry-eyed and they are thinking about the colors for bridesmaids\u2019 dresses, and they are thinking about whether they\u2019re going to have candles, or they\u2019re going to have flowers, and the photography\u2014you say all of that is fine\u2014but, if you are going to coach them: \u201cMake sure you don\u2019t forget this, and this, and this.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhere would you point them?\u00a0 <br>\u00a0\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And I would just jump in here and say, \u201cBefore you have a word about the rehearsal dinner, the wedding, or the reception, you, first of all, need to talk about how you\u2019re going to take a marriage license and turn it into a marriage.\u201d\u00a0 That means you need to have good biblical preparation. That\u2019s what FamilyLife has been up to since our very beginning. This ministry started as a marriage preparation ministry to equip singles in the most sacred commitment two human beings make to one another. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd I\u2019m not diminishing the ceremony in <em>any <\/em>way. I just want to say to any couple, thinking about answering your question, Bob, \u201cThe place you start is at the main thing\u2014making the main thing the <em>main thing<\/em>.\u201d\u00a0 [Laughter]\u00a0 You\u2019re about to get married for goodness sakes, and you need to make sure you are prepared. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, you being, Catherine, a pastor\u2019s daughter\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014your dad, undoubtedly lined you up to go through all kinds of great marriage preparation courses and classes\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Sent you to the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> and stuff like that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014sent you to that. You were totally skilled and ready when you got married; right?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Let\u2019s just say\u2014God is gracious. [Laughter]\u00a0 You know, I\u2014we had a few conversations\u2014but my husband and I did not have any, really, any premarital counseling, going in. I think some of that was logistical\u2014we were living in different places. We didn\u2019t have a home church \/ I was still in college. We were kind of all over the place, at the time; but that would be one big regret. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHonestly, my husband sat down with my dad to ask for my hand in marriage. This wasn\u2019t exactly premarital counseling; but I think he fulfilled a little bit of the role that a pastor would do in doing that. He asked my husband 45-minutes worth of questions. My husband was thinking a quick \u201cYes\u201d or \u201cNo\u201d; you know?\u00a0 \u201cLet\u2019s get the answer and move on with it.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe asked him all sorts of very difficult questions. He said, \u201cHow are you going to handle Catherine\u2019s strong will and her stubbornness?\u201d\u00a0 This is what he said\u2014I would not claim those things for myself\u2014but my husband had no idea, at the time. We weren\u2019t engaged yet. He didn\u2019t\u2014I\u2019d kind of been putting my best foot forward for so long, and he didn\u2019t know that I was like that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd he found out, when he asked me to marry him, through a whole series of events, that I was, in fact, quite stubborn. Thankfully, he knew kind of ahead of time. He had already thought through\u2014and so, I think that\u2019s the role that premarital counseling serves in some ways\u2014and marriage counseling, in general, is saying: \u201cThese are the areas that you both need grace,\u201d and \u201cHow are you going to work through those things?\u201d and \u201cWhat does the Bible say about that?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, and of course, we do recommend that couples\u2014if they can\u2014get to a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>There are breakout sessions at the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> designed specifically for pre-married couples. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And if you know someone who is getting married in the next 12 months\u2014I know this is a little more on the expensive side, in terms of a wedding gift\u2014but I\u2019m going to promise you something\u2014out of giving them toasters, dishes, silverware, a vacuum cleaner\u2014all the things that young couples need when they start their marriage\u2014I don\u2019t think there is going to be a gift they receive\u2014if you give them a certificate to go to the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>\u2014you\u2019re going to give them the best wedding gift they are going to get. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, I could introduce you to a couple, right now\u2014we could pick up the phone. We won\u2019t do it, but they got married in 1986. They had been given the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> as a wedding gift by a friend. Both came from families that pretty much were set\u2014so, it wasn\u2019t a matter of them needing a lot to get married. And they both would look back today and say: \u201cYou know what? That gift changed the course of their lives, their marriage, their family, their legacy, their ministry.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, it got them thinking, not about the wedding\u2014it got them thinking about the marriage. And that\u2019s part of what premarital counseling ought to have you doing\u2014not thinking so much about \u201cWhat\u2019s the one-hour ceremony going to be?\u201d but thinking about\u00a0 \u201cWhat\u2019s the 50-year marriage going to be?\u201d because that\u2019s really the big issue. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut Linda, I\u2019ve got to turn to you and say\u2014you\u2019re sitting down with a young couple\u2014they are saying: \u201cWe want to get married. We do want to make sure our ceremony honors Christ.\u201d\u00a0 Apart from the whole issue of vows\u2014and I loved what you were saying, Catherine, about you don\u2019t just make declarations of love \/ you make some promises to one another. Apart from that, what needs to be a part of that day \/ that ceremony?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>If I was counseling a couple today, I would say, \u201cFirst of all\u2014the two of you\u2014sit down and talk about that day and pray, pray, pray about that day. Make sure that <em>you\u2019re<\/em> united in what you want about this. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEven before you sit down and talk to your parents, and you get other sides of the family, pray about what is most important to the two of you and make sure it\u2019s not about <em>you<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so performance-based, as a society. We want to wow people. You have this desire to make it \u201call about us.\u201d Young Christian couples can be pulled into that so quickly\u2014the very same thing\u2014but just \u201cHow can we make it not about us?\u201d\u00a0 You know, we taught our children the acrostic when they were young about J-O-Y: \u201cJesus, Others, Yourself.\u201d\u00a0 You know, it\u2019s about Jesus\u2014and then, it\u2019s about serving those guests that come: \u201cHow are you going to serve them?\u00a0 How are you going to treat them?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Now, what do you mean?\u00a0 That just sounds weird\u2014a wedding is about the bride. It\u2019s about\u2014it\u2019s <em>her <\/em>day. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Serving the guests who come\u2014what do you mean?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Well, I want to just put in a plug for what she\u2019s saying. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think weddings are a great thing for married people to attend because it does give you a moment to reflect\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014upon what you promised because, when you got married, you were\u2014your brainwaves were flat, at that point. You were numbed over by all the activity and all of what was taking place. So, it takes going to somebody else\u2019s wedding\u2014you\u2019re nodding your head, Catherine, because\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You kind of re-up every time you go; don\u2019t you?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You really do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And you\u2019re reminded of what two people pledge and promise one another\u2014and it\u2019s more than just staying married. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Absolutely, I mean, I think so many people said to me, \u201cYou won\u2019t remember anything about your wedding.\u201d That was one thing I specifically prayed for, leading up to it\u2014is that I could really be present \/ remember what was being said, and take it all in. But there is a limit to that. I think that\u2019s the joy of attending a wedding and being a witness to it. I think it\u2019s for married couples. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think, also, part of what Mom is saying in serving others\u2014one group that we do a really poor job of serving is single people in our weddings. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have friends that <em>hate<\/em> going to weddings because it\u2019s either difficult\u2014just to watch someone getting married\u2014or it\u2019s difficult\u2014someone is going to throw the bouquet. The bride throws the bouquet, and everyone pushes you out there in the middle. I think people are well-meaning in that, but it\u2019s a very uncomfortable thing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Because, as a single person, this may be your 43<sup>rd<\/sup> wedding\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014you\u2019ve attended from all of your acquaintances and friends. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Yes. And you are <em>happy<\/em> for those people, but you don\u2019t want to be shoved out there, as an example\u2014as if you are not whole\u2014you need something\u00a0 \/ you\u2019re lacking something.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, how can we serve our single friends who are coming to a wedding?\u00a0 What would you suggest?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Yes, I think there are some practical ways. First of all, I would toss out the bouquet toss, honestly\u2014I would get rid of that. I don\u2019t think it serves anyone, and there are some really creative ideas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne person did the bouquet toss, but they invited everyone\u2014married\/single, men\/women\u2014to all come out. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey had done a bouquet that had movie gift cards, and candy, and different\u2014you know, Starbucks gift cards\u2014something like that. They wanted it just to be a way of thanking the people that came in a really fun thing. They said their photographer actually said that was the best bouquet picture he\u2019s ever gotten because everyone actually wanted to be out there\u2014and they were all very excited about it. [Laughter]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think some of it is just\u2014when you look at your wedding as the body of Christ coming around you\u2014you look at it as mutual service \/ mutual dedication to the work that the Lord is doing. So, just being intentional\u2014I mean, that may just be the bride talking to her friends or making sure that every conversation she has with her friends, leading up to the wedding, is not about the wedding. No one wants their relationship to completely change and just be so wedding-centric. I think it\u2019s just\u2014you can think creatively, but you can also just pray for ways to serve that person. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think the Lord is faithful to do that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Let\u2019s talk about mother\/daughter relationships in the days that lead up to the wedding\u2014maybe the months. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Bob: <\/strong>What\u2019s there to talk about there?\u00a0 [Laughter]\u00a0 It\u2019s all smooth, sweet\u2014\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You know\u2014yes, for a dad\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014in case he has a Geiger counter and can detect the radioactive fallout from the atomic bombs that go off. Linda, talk about what\u2019s the best counsel you can give a young lady who is getting ready to get married as she relates to her mom in planning the wedding. And then, I\u2019m coming back to you, Catherine. I\u2019m going to let you\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Oh, boy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014coach the moms. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>That\u2019s a really good question. Catherine and I did not have problems in the wedding process\u2014the planning. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>\u2014which is a miracle. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>It really is. We have problems over giving <em>directions<\/em> when we drive!\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You\u2019re stubborn. Who did you get that from?\u2014your dad?\u00a0 [Laughter]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>It\u2019s this one, right here!\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>It\u2019s probably this one. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>At least, you were stubborn about the same things. You were stubborn in the same direction when you were getting married. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>I would like to give advice to the mothers, actually\u2014first, it\u2019s not your wedding. I think a mother has to remember it is <em>not<\/em> her wedding\u2014it\u2019s her daughter\u2019s wedding. So, I think\u2014I\u2019ll say that first to mothers. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTo daughters, I think just being open to their mother\u2019s counsel, asking their mothers for prayer. Asking your mother to be your prayer warrior would be <em>huge<\/em>. You know, to me, as a mother, that\u2019s a <em>delight <\/em>when my children ask me to pray for them specifically for things. But just being willing to listen to your mother\u2019s counsel, I think, is so important because older women have been there\u2014we\u2019ve seen things\u2014we kind of know what works and what doesn\u2019t work. And so, those are just kind of basic. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Could I add one in there?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I\u2019d encourage daughters to say to their mom, \u201cYou know, Mom, when it gets tough, let\u2019s develop the ability to laugh,\u201d because there is something about a wedding that exhausts you. Small things become big things, and big things get blown into gargantuan things. Then, before long, you\u2019re irritated, or angry, or bitter, or resentful about something that doesn\u2019t matter\u2014it\u2019s not going to matter ten years from today. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>It\u2019s really interesting you saying that. We felt like we had done everything that we were supposed to do for the wedding\u2014all the checklists were done. So, we get to the church the day of the wedding. Everything is in place, and the bakery comes in with the wedding cake. It was\u2014wedding cake is <em>huge<\/em>. If you ever saw <em>Father of the Bride<\/em>\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Oh, yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>\u2014you know it\u2019s all about the cake. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>So, they\u2014it was supposed to be this white cake with white scroll lacework on it. It was supposed to be on a small board so it could sit on this silver piece. Well, it comes in\u2014it\u2019s white, but it has chocolate scroll work all over it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>That\u2019s perfect\u2014that\u2019s perfect. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I think it sounds perfect to me too!\u00a0 [Laughter]\u00a0 Somebody vetoed you\u2014made the right call, I would say. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>And it\u2019s on this <em>huge<\/em> wooden board. I\u2019m like: \u201c<em>Okay<\/em>. That\u2019s all right. God has a plan for this too.\u201d The florist happened to have enough flowers to put around the base of it\u2014it all worked. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And Catherine, what did you think?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>You know what?\u00a0 I had\u2014one of my bridesmaids was a missionary kid. She was standing next to me when they brought the cake in. There\u2019s just a little bit of perspective for you\u2014she grew up in the Philippians\u2014and if I complained about that cake, she would have been all over me because\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes, that is what we call a first-world problem; right?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Exactly. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>Exactly. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Your mom gave advice both to the mother of the bride and to the bride. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Sorry. [Laughter]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, you get an opportunity\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>You know what I\u2019m dealing with here, now! [Laughter]\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I\u2019ll tell you what\u2014you\u2019ll get an opportunity to do the <em>same<\/em> thing. You can both coach the mother of the bride and the bride. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBefore you do that, though, let me tell our listeners how they can get a copy of the book the two of you have written. It\u2019s called <em>A Christ-Centered Wedding: Rejoicing in the Gospel on Your Big Day<\/em>. We have copies in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link at the top of the page that says, \u201cGO DEEPER.\u201d\u00a0 That\u2019ll take you right to where you can find information about how to order a copy of the book from us. Or you can call to order\u20141-800-FL-TODAY. Once again, the title of the book is <em>A Christ-Centered Wedding<\/em>. Order, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then, the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhile we\u2019re talking about saying, \u201cI do,\u201d we should mention that tomorrow, in Washington, DC, and in a couple hundred churches, all around the world, we\u2019re going to have a lot of couples standing up and saying, \u201cI still do,\u201d as we host our third <em>I Still Do<\/em><em><sup>\u2122<\/sup><\/em> one-day event for couples\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014this time at the Verizon Center in Washington, DC\u2014and, as I mentioned, in hundreds of churches, around the country and around the world. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to say, \u201cThank you,\u201d to the folks who support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. We are a non-profit organization. So, the events that we do, and this radio program, the resources we create\u2014all of those are made possible because of financial support we receive from folks, like you, who believe that what we are doing is important. And we\u2019re very grateful for you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you can help with a donation today, we\u2019d like to say a special \u201cThank you,\u201d by sending you a 2015 calendar. It\u2019s the Spirit-Filled Year calendar. It focuses on the fruit of the Spirit and how that can be a part of your marriage and your family. It\u2019s our thank-you gift when you go, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link in the upper right-hand corner of the homepage that says, \u201cI Care,\u201d and make an online donation. Or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and make a donation over the phone. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAsk for the calendar when you get in touch with us. Or you can write a note\u2014send a donation to our mailing address. It\u2019s Post Office Box 7111, Little Rock, AR. And the zip code is 72223. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Well, we\u2019ve had a good time. You ladies had a good time joining us on the broadcast?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Oh, absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This has been fun. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It\u2019s been fun. Catherine Strode Parks has joined us, along with her mom, Linda. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBefore Bob explained how they could get a copy of your book, which I really want to commend to listeners as well\u2014<em>A Christ-Centered Wedding<\/em>\u2014Bob had asked you, Catherine, to do what your mom did\u2014which is not answer my question which is\u2014but go ahead and speak to both groups\u2014both to the bride, who is getting married, and to the mother of the bride. Just give them some coaching as they move forward. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Catherine: <\/strong>I think\u2014to both, I would really commend reading through parts of the book of Colossians. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think the idea of our unity and our identity in Christ is so key there\u2014and knowing the things that we\u2019ve put off and the things that we\u2019re putting on. And some of those things\u2014humility, and kindness, and love\u2014and if both the mother and the daughter are believers, then, those are the things that should characterize our interactions. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>So, I think to the bride, I would say: \u201cFocus on what\u2019s really important and be willing to let things go that aren\u2019t. And then, give some things to your mom and ask her: \u2018I respect you. I love your vision for these things. Could you take care of this?\u2019 Giving her some responsibility shows that you love her, and you trust her, and you value that relationship.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That\u2019s good advice. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It is. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And Linda, for you, you only had one daughter to have one wedding with; right?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And for a lot of moms, that\u2019s a big deal\u2014it\u2019s a once-in-a-lifetime event.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>It is. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But the mom\u2019s got to recognize it\u2019s not your day. It\u2019s not even her day; is it?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Linda: <\/strong>No, it is not her day either. That\u2019s\u2014when I go back and look at planning Catherine\u2019s wedding\u2014it was a beautiful Christ-centered wedding\u2014but I feel like I missed an opportunity, as a mom, to be more intentional in the time with my daughter and more time that we could have spent praying together. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd really there are some things\u2014we would go back \/ she and Eric would go back\u2014and change in their wedding to make it, not so much just a ceremony, but go back to make it a <em>worship<\/em> service\u2014and to involve the people there more in the worship, whether it\u2019s a congregational singing\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I\u2019ll jump in here. I attended a wedding here recently\u2014a good friend of mine, Michael and Cindy Easley\u2014their daughter got married in Nashville. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt the end of the wedding, they called the family members\u2014all the family members up to gather around the couple. As there were some songs being sung, they laid hands and gathered around that couple and prayed for them. It was powerful because it symbolized two families coming together, around this couple starting out\u2014and, again, forging that marriage covenant\u2014but doing it under the authority of God and asking Him to bless that couple. It was a <em>powerful<\/em> statement. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong><em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2014 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/303217","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=303217"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=303217"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=303217"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=303217"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=303217"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=303217"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=303217"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}