{"id":302910,"date":"2014-01-21T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2014-01-21T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/love-renewed-the-millers-part-2\/"},"modified":"2014-01-21T12:00:00","modified_gmt":"2014-01-21T17:00:00","slug":"love-renewed-the-millers-part-2","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/love-renewed-the-millers-part-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Love Renewed: The Millers, Part 2"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Lance and Jess tell about their incredible 9-month journey from immorality to abstinence to forgiveness, purity and finally, a marriage built on a solid biblical foundation.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2014-01-21.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"23.97M","filesize_raw":"25138988","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2848,2822],"tags":[4076,5201,5318,5202,2877],"podcast_series":[7993],"cwp_profile":[9327],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302910","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-cultural-issues","category-growing-in-your-faith","tag-biblical-foundation","tag-cohabitation","tag-immorality","tag-living-together","tag-marriage","podcast_series-love-renewed-lance-and-jess-miller","cwp_profile-lance-and-jess-miller","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302910\/love-renewed-the-millers-part-2","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302910\/love-renewed-the-millers-part-2","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"Ss9CWSJ2DJ\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/love-renewed-the-millers-part-2\/\">Love Renewed: The Millers, Part 2<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/love-renewed-the-millers-part-2\/embed\/#?secret=Ss9CWSJ2DJ\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Love Renewed: The Millers, Part 2&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"Ss9CWSJ2DJ\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2014-01-21.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2014-01-21.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Jess Miller had been raised in a Christian home. When she and her boyfriend started to become sexually-active and, then, when they moved in together, she did feel some sense of guilt and shame. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I had the thoughts; but I was still believing, \u201cThere won\u2019t be anybody else,\u201d so I was still talking myself into it. There was the fear that, if I stopped, he would walk away. I knew I didn\u2019t want that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Tuesday, January 21<sup>st<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. We\u2019ll hear from Jess and Lance Miller today. We\u2019ll hear how God changed their heart and changed their mind about living together outside of marriage. Stay tuned.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Tuesday edition. I remember, not long ago, when we had Glenn Stanton joining us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>\u2014we were talking about the issue of co-habitation. He said that the most common path to marriage today goes through a season of living together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Sixty percent of those who get married today have first co-habited. We hear that statistic and we think, \u201cOh, that\u2019s all <em>those<\/em> people, over there.\u201d Well, you know what? It\u2019s people in all walks of life. They\u2019re in church with you\u2014you work with them. These are people who\u2014they\u2019re just living life according to what the cultural drum is beating. They\u2019re marching to its step.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We\u2019ve been hearing a story from a couple, like that, this week\u2014a story from a couple who met on a missions trip. They became sexually-active on the missions trip. They really, except for a few tinges of guilt, they never thought that what they were doing was wrong. They moved in together, as we\u2019ll hear today; and then, God used a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup><\/em> marriage getaway\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>This is a great story.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It is a great story. I don\u2019t want to give it away, but I do want our listeners to remember that this week is the last week you can sign up\u2014or sign someone else up\u2014to attend a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway and save 50 percent off the regular rate. It\u2019s our buy one\/get one free week. The rate is available for <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners. You just have to type my name\u2014type \u201cBOB\u201d\u2014in the promo code box when you fill out the registration for them online; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and say: \u201cI listen to <em>FamilyLife Today. <\/em>We\u2019re interested in going,\u201d or, \u201cI want to sign somebody else up.\u201d You can take advantage of this\u2014buy one\/ get one free. You pay for yourself\u2014and your spouse comes free or your fianc\u00e9 comes free\u2014or you pay for one person \/ the other person comes free. So\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And as a conference, it doesn\u2019t get any better than this. It\u2019s the finest biblical training on marriage and family that I know, anywhere in the world. We\u2019ve had over two-and-a-half million people who have been through the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>. Come\u2014experience a great weekend. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s fun; it\u2019s romantic. It\u2019ll equip you to better go the distance in your marriage. Bring somebody with you, where you can have a spiritual impact in their lives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And if, for some reason, the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> doesn\u2019t work for you this spring\u2014it\u2019s not coming to a city near where you live\u2014I\u2019m pretty sure there\u2019s going to be an <em>Art of Marriage<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> video event happening near you. You can go to FamilyLifeToday.com and click on the link for <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em>. Find out where there\u2019s an event taking place, and you can attend <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> video event. It\u2019s a day-and-a-half long event, usually hosted in a local church or in some other location. If there\u2019s not one of those happening near you, you can host your own.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Host one! Have it at your church, have it in your basement of your home, or your living room. Decide to make an impact on couples like the story you\u2019re going to hear today\u2014they\u2019re all around you. They need someone to give them hope that there is a solution to what they\u2019re facing in marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong><em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> is a day-and-a-half long video event. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe have decided, this week, that we will send you <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> kit, at no cost, if you will order manuals for, at least, five couples and take those five couples through the event. Find out more by going to FamilyLifeToday.com and clicking on the link for <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em>. Whether it\u2019s a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> or an <em>Art of Marriage<\/em> video event\u2014that you host or that you attend\u2014do something for your marriage this spring. Do something to strengthen it\u2014do something to keep it pointed in the right direction. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And Bob, what our listeners need to know\u2014we\u2019ve had almost 400,000 people go through <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> because someone, like you, as a couple, cared enough to host it. It\u2019s very simple to do\u2014we\u2019ll coach you, we\u2019ll equip you, we\u2019ll come alongside you to do it. It\u2019s a great way for you two to have an impact and really push back against the culture.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, again, go to FamilyLifeToday.com for more information. Click on the link for either the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> or <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tToday, we\u2019re going to hear from a couple who has been involved with both of those events\u2014Lance and Jess Miller. They live in Florida\u2014young couple\u2014met on a missions trip, became sexually-active while they were on the missions trip. At the end of the missions trip, they decided they\u2019d just move in together. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou were gone the day that they were in the office, but we gathered the whole staff team together. I had a chance to quiz them on their story.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And this is Part Two of what they shared with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You moved to Florida. You didn\u2019t know where you were going to be living.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I moved into his parents\u2019 house with him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, the family just opens up a room; and you can stay there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Both of our families never said anything against us, really.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Does the family know that you guys are sleeping together?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>They pretty much found out because we stayed in the room in the house. I mean, it was pretty\u2014I think it started to get awkward for them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So they never said: \u201cHey, Lance! This is not what you ought to be doing\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Not right away. My mom finally got the courage. About two or three months in\u2014\u2014once I started going by to work and we started doing life\u2014we found out that this is not going to work. My mom said: \u201cLook, you have to get another place. You have to get out of here. It\u2019s causing more hurt.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But her concern was, \u201cYou guys get another place,\u201d not, \u201cYou guys shouldn\u2019t be living together.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Correct. It wasn\u2019t as much on that as: \u201cYou\u2019re hurting. What\u2019s going on here?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Your parents know you were living with a guy\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014in Florida?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Did they ever say anything?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Not a word.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And so you, eventually, move out of the house\u2014the two of you are living together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Are you thinking, \u201cLife is cool\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You thinking, \u201cLife is cool\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I, actually\u2014when I moved there, the first thing I did was create a resume. I sent it to every church in the zip code\u2014like 40 copies of my resume. I got hired right away, and I kept getting phone calls and stuff. I was actually hired to work with kids. When we moved into the apartment, the pastor said: \u201cWait a minute! Are you doing what I think you\u2019re doing?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe said, \u201cYes;\u201d and he said: \u201cYou can\u2019t work with our kids if you can\u2019t live an upstanding life.\u201d That was a very\u2014so, I had already been getting the pressure from the church, a little bit, and held accountable. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, you lost the job. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I\u2019d\u2014well, I still worked for them. They didn\u2019t give up on me, but I could not work with the kids. I could only do my technology skills,\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>\u2014at the time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You\u2019re still playing drums in the church?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But they know you\u2019re living together?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Anybody ever say anything?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>The pastor did. Some people kind of raised their eyebrows a little bit and kind of\u2014nobody really asked us directly, like the pastor.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We talked, earlier, about the fact that the path you guys were on is the common path today.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Most young people live together before they get married. Most young people do not get married having not had sex. So, you were doing what the culture\u2019s doing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Is there anything somebody could have pulled you aside and said that would have caused you to go, \u201cI\u2019m not sure we should be doing this.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I had the thoughts; but I was still believing, \u201cThere won\u2019t be anybody else.\u201d So, I was still talking myself into it. There was the fear\u2014that if I stopped, he would walk away. I knew I didn\u2019t want that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Hadyou guys talked about marriage?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I\u2014one day, I had a friend who was getting married. They had waited, and they were a great example for me; but he didn\u2019t know them as well. I said: \u201cListen. We\u2019ve never talked about it\u2014I want to talk about it. I want to marry you. That\u2019s why I moved here.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What did you think when she said that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I was speechless.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes? Did it begin a dialogue on the subject?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Actually, he asked me if we needed to test it. He said: \u201cSo what? Do we move out, apart from each other, and see if we can manage on our own? And, if we need each other, and come back?\u201d I just started crying.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Because you thought,\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Because I knew\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014\u201cHe\u2019s going to move away.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>\u2014the difference was that he had never seen a good example. My parents had had tough times, growing up and what not; but the topic of divorce never came up. It\u2019s always: \u201cWe stick this out. We\u2019re here\u2014we\u2019re chosen\u2014we\u2019re going.\u201d I didn\u2019t know how it worked, but I knew it could work. We needed to just decide and go for it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes. So how did the two of you\u2014with no marriage plans on the horizon\u2014one conversation. You\u2019ve been living together, for a couple of years, at this point. How\u2019d you wind up at a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Good question.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Well, one of the coolest things that\u2014being an introvert in my job\u2014I get to do\u2014is I get to go to different people\u2019s houses during the day. I drive a service van. While I\u2019m driving a service van, I decided to turn\u2014I\u2019d been flipping through and listening to all the secular stations. I said, \u201cI\u2019m tired of listening to the same song over and over.\u201d Sure enough, <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> comes on. You guys were talking, at the end of the program, about a <em>Weekend to Remember. <\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou said, \u201cLook, if you are a young person or you\u2019re just asking the question about, \u2018Should I get married?\u2019 or want to know more, you <em>need to be<\/em> at this conference.\u201d That\u2019s all it took.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You went home and said, \u201cHey, we\u2019re going to a marriage conference\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>No! He didn\u2019t tell me! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, you got there, eventually! So, how did you\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>He signed us up, and he took me. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I wanted to try it out. That was the word in my head.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay, so you\u2019re driving to a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway with your boyfriend.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What were you thinking was going on?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I was panicking. I was\u2014I mean, if I was a different person, I might have not gotten in that car. I was freaked out: \u201cThis is for married people. It\u2019s a marriage getaway. What are you doing?\u201d Like: \u201cI don\u2019t know anybody! This is way\u2014I don\u2019t even have a comfort zone in sight<strong>.\u201d <\/strong>[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Were you thinking you were going to walk in and everybody was going to kind of look at you: \u201cWhat are you guys doing?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>We didn\u2019t know what it was like! We thought it was going to be questions and answers: \u201cHow\u2019s it going?\u201d I was like: \u201cWe don\u2019t have anything to talk about! He hasn\u2019t asked me! I don\u2019t know if he wants to marry me!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>When did some light start to come on, over the course of the weekend, for you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I tell you what\u2014Tim and Joy Downs were there. Tim\u2014he just lightened the load, right away, on that second session. I mean, he was just getting everybody laughing. By the end of the session, we were like, \u201cIt\u2019s okay.\u201d I think she even relaxed a little bit.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>A little.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. Yes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And then, the next day, you\u2019re going through everything\u2014doing the projects. Did you go to the pre-married session that next morning?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. That was where we really found out that there\u2019s more than we thought to this marriage thing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I have to preface this by saying: \u201cAfter that first session, I was really just like: \u2018Wow! This is great. There is something more. I\u2019m so glad we\u2019re here.\u2019\u201d It took so much courage for her to keep following me there. I had to kind of\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>He was dragging me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. So, prefacing the second session, we saw it was going to be all-out\u2014guys and girls talk about whatever\u2014about sex, and\u2014we were feeling so guilty\u2014the guilt\u2014that\u2019s where it hit me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>And, I didn\u2019t know what to do with it. We were talking about it\u2014we\u2019re like\u2014she didn\u2019t want to go the second session. I\u2019m like: \u201cLook, I think you should just go. We\u2019re here already. Let\u2019s just go. It\u2019s going to be okay. What\u2019s the worst that can happen?\u201d She was still really on the fence. I said: \u201cLook. We\u2019re going to go ask Tim Downs, right now, what he thinks about it.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI said, \u201cLook, Tim, me and my girlfriend\u2014we\u2019re having sex. We don\u2019t know about this. We\u2019re living together. We don\u2019t know about this\u2014whether to go to this session or not\u2014what do you think?\u201d He just encouraged us. He said, \u201cI think that\u2019s right where you need to be.\u201d So, I encouraged her again. I said, \u201cWe\u2019re going to go,\u201d gave her a hug, and we went to our separate ways.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And for you, that session was an eye-opener. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Jeff Paton was at that session. That guy\u2019s\u2014he\u2019s big!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>He\u2019s big, mentally, too.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>He\u2019s just on there\u2014he shoots straight\u2014and he, literally, looked at us guys. First, he asked: \u201cWho\u2019s not married yet?\u201d or, \u201cWho\u2019s not engaged?\u201d He said, \u201cWhat are you guys waiting for?\u201d I was like, \u201cOkay.\u201d He said, \u201cAre you living together?\u201d He was like, \u201cYou not engaged? What are you waiting for?\u201d That hit me. I\u2019m like, \u201cUh-oh.\u201d I could see where this was going. He said: \u201cIf you are having sex with your girlfriend, you need to stop! You need to go to her and tell her you want to honor her and her body. You need to stop.\u201d He said, \u201cI don\u2019t know how you can stay in the same motel room with her\u2014let alone, sleep in the same bed right now.\u201d And\u2014and that was heavy.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes! [Laughter] When did you ever bring up, with her, what had been talked about in the guys\u2019 section?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I was\u2014it was rolling over my mind what I had to do: \u201cWhat do I have to do? What do I have to do?\u201d So, I mean, it just kept hitting me: \u201cYou got to stop. If you want this \u2018something more\u2019\u2014that they\u2019re talking about, here, at this conference\u2014you have to change\u2014you got to change your behavior.\u201d We were talking about the roles of a man, as the leader, in the morning session. I\u2019m like, \u201cIf that\u2019s going to be my role, I\u2019m going to have to make the decision here.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe went to get in bed that night. I just said: \u201cWait! This is what we talked about in the second session. I don\u2019t\u2026\u201d We kind of talked. I said, \u201cWhat did you guys talk about?\u201d It wasn\u2019t very good for her, but I told her what happened to me. I said, \u201cWe can\u2019t do this.\u201d Luckily, there were two beds in that room. I half gave her a hug, and she started crying. You might have to ask her what she was going through, but\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What were you going through?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I didn\u2019t know. I didn\u2019t understand. I, literally\u2014we had been kind of struggling to stay afloat. I felt like my anchor just walked away from me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You were thinking the relationship\u2019s\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I thought he was on his way out the door. He had rejected the thought of marriage; and now, he was, physically, rejecting me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, when did you realize that wasn\u2019t what was going on?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>It took a period of a couple of months. That was in June. He didn\u2019t propose until August. Somewhere, in between, I kind of figured out where we were going; but it was just very lonely because my love language is physical touch\u2014my number one. He just\u2014we couldn\u2019t even hold hands anymore. He just sat on the other end of the couch<strong>. <\/strong>[Laughter] I really felt isolated.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But you\u2019re living together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes. He slept on the couch.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Wow! Why\u2019d you wait till August, Dude? Come on! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance:<\/strong> I\u2019d no\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Were you just trying to decide, \u201cAm I really\u2014should we really get married?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. It\u2019s like taking the plunge. It\u2019s like going beneath the surface.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Am I going to go or not because I\u2019m facing all these people, telling me: \u201cNothing changes. There\u2019s nothing there.\u201d It\u2014ooh.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, from Saturday night, at the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>, until the honeymoon night, you guys maintained your purity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>How long was that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Eight months. [Applause]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That\u2019s really hard!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes, it is!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>You know what\u2014yes. You know what did it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>And this is props to the crew who put the manual together, <em>The Purity Promise<\/em>, in there. I pulled that thing out, ripped it out of there, and I signed it with the date. Just the wording in there\u2014just, man, hits you like a ton of bricks\u2014if you\u2019re really going to do this right, then, you\u2019re going to sign it. You\u2019re going to put it on your refrigerator, and you\u2019ll look at it every day.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>And it\u2019s still on our fridge.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Your honeymoon had to be pretty special.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes! They\u2019re\u2014mostly good. There was a lot of guilt that I was dealing with because I knew I hadn\u2019t done it right, and I couldn\u2019t take it back. I had thought\u2014I had tricked myself into believing that, because he was the only one, it wouldn\u2019t matter when it started. On my wedding day, it was very hard to look at him, for a little bit, because, even though it was still just him, it was wrong.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But, I still have to think that, somehow, in that eight months of living with a commitment to purity, God was at work in your lives\u2014in your relationship. Your spiritual intimacy had to grow by leaps and bounds during that period.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Right, we had to go back to where we started because we came together doing ministry together. We were still involved\u2014but not for the total pure reasons that we needed to be. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe got plugged back into as much ministry as we could together\u2014you know, he plays the drums \/ I run the sound\u2014you know. He designs the stage lighting\u2014you know, just working together for God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You guys have also hosted a couple of <em>Art of Marriage<\/em> events; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Tell us about why you did that and what\u2019s happened.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Well, we go to a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> every year now. We figure: \u201cWe\u2019re never not going to take the time to re-plug into what we need to do.\u201d The next year\u2014when we got to go to our first one, married\u2014which was much better\u2014[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Oh, yes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>\u2014it\u2019s like: \u201cI got this.\u201d Walked in\u2014it was fine. That was when they were announcing the release of <em>Art of Marriage<\/em>. They played the clips, and it was out there. It was really expensive; and I went, \u201cThis is what we need to show.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere are so many young people in our church that our hearts just break for because they\u2019re either doing what we did or they\u2019re about to\u2014you can see it coming. So, I knew we needed to do that. It just struck me; but, at the same time, we knew our church couldn\u2019t afford it. We had a heart for it, but we couldn\u2019t get our hands on it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So what happened? How did you wind up doing it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>The radio saved us again. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I heard you, again, on the radio. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>You said, \u201cIf it\u2019s just something you feel like would benefit your church, just tell us the date, and the time, and we\u2019ll get it out to you.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>For free.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. We wouldn\u2019t ever have got it otherwise. I mean\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So how many couples came that first time?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I think we had ten the first time. We hoped for a small group because we were test running it. We knew it was going to be a regular part of the ministry. The pastor loved the idea: \u201cSure, you want to be marriage ministry leaders. Go for it! Do it.\u201d So, we had a small group; and they loved it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI mean, we had barely-married\u2014they had gotten pregnant, as teenagers, and gotten married because they were pregnant. Then, we had people who wrote on their comments \u201cI wish this was around when I was young.\u201d And you are like, \u201cYes, I wasn\u2019t even there yet; how could I give this to you?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Are you going to do more?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes; definitely. We\u2019re looking at the <em>Stepping Up<\/em><sup>\u2122<\/sup> program. If I had to just go into that, I mean, that\u2019s one of the things, as a young man and being an introvert, I feel like I need permission to be great or to do something bigger. My pastor, coming in and saying, \u201cLook, I can\u2019t groom you for ministry and I can\u2019t have Jess working with kids unless you guys are going to do this right.\u201d He showed me something bigger.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>How about if I give you permission to do <em>Stepping Up<\/em> with the guys? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I mean\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You good with that?\u00a0 How about if I give you the kit?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>We, actually, have it. You did the free thing again. [Laughter and applause]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. So, it\u2019s on the list. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just want to come bring this back, full circle, and say: \u201cWhat you guys are doing here\u2014and, I mean, from Dennis and Bob, you guys are driving this thing home. Everyone here\u2014from Jim cleaning the bathrooms\u2014is engineering a hope. You guys are doing something amazing. I just can\u2019t thank you enough for what you guys do every day. [Emotion in voice] It\u2019s changed our lives. We\u2019re a living example right here. You\u2019ve changed our family tree.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>And we\u2019re helping change others.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Helping change others.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>How about that; huh? [Applause]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We\u2019ve been listening to Lance and Jess Miller. You\u2019re kind of smiling as you hear them tell their story.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Well, you know, changing your family tree\u2014there are a lot of them that need to be changed today, in our country. Here\u2019s the message I want you to hear: \u201cNo matter what condition your family tree is in, there\u2019s hope to, not only change it, but turn it around and have it produce fruit.\u201d Did you hear? That couple <em>is already<\/em> making a difference! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019re giving you all these ways to do it\u2014bring someone to the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>, host an <em>Art of Marriage<\/em>\u2014get <em>Stepping Up<\/em>, and be a part of Super Saturday, and make a difference in a group of men. It\u2019s game time! Step up, and decide what your battle front is, and come join us at a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>, Art of Marriage, or <em>Stepping Up<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Right now, <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> event kit is\u2014like it was when Lance called us to order his\u2014we\u2019re making it available, free, to anyone who will agree to take, at least, five couples through the material. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou order the workbooks for five, or ten, or fifteen \/ twenty couples\u2014however many you have\u2014at least, five. We\u2019ll send you the DVDs and the complete event kit, at no cost to you. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com and click on the link for <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> to take advantage of this special offer. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s available for just a limited time; so go, online, today: FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and say, \u201cHow do I get <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> kit for free? I heard something about that on the radio.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019re interested in the <em>Weekend to Remember,<\/em> this is the last week to take advantage of the buy one\/get one free special offer we\u2019re making to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners. You sign up to attend an upcoming <em>Weekend to Remember <\/em>marriage getaway, you pay regular rate for yourself; and your spouse comes free. But you have to sign up this week. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGo to FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link for the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>. When you fill out the online registration form, put my name\u2014put \u201cBOB\u201d\u2014in the online promo code box. Or simply call 1-800-FL-TODAY and say: \u201cI\u2019m interested in the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>. I want to take advantage of the special offer that I heard about on the radio.\u201d We\u2019ll get you all taken care of and answer any questions you might have. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we hope to see you in Hershey, on Valentine\u2019s weekend, with Dennis, and me, and the Wilsons\u2014or at any of our upcoming <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaways this spring.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to introduce you to another couple who came to a very dark spot in their marriage. In fact, they came to a spot where it was not clear whether their marriage could survive. We\u2019ll introduce you to David and Kim Scott tomorrow and hear another remarkable story of God\u2019s redeeming work in the life of this couple. I hope you can tune in for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2014 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["23.97M"],"filesize_raw":["25138988"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-302910.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-302910.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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and Jess tell about their incredible 9-month journey from immorality to abstinence to forgiveness, purity and finally, a marriage built on a solid biblical foundation.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2014-01-21.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Jess Miller had been raised in a Christian home. When she and her boyfriend started to become sexually-active and, then, when they moved in together, she did feel some sense of guilt and shame. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I had the thoughts; but I was still believing, \u201cThere won\u2019t be anybody else,\u201d so I was still talking myself into it. There was the fear that, if I stopped, he would walk away. I knew I didn\u2019t want that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Tuesday, January 21<sup>st<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. We\u2019ll hear from Jess and Lance Miller today. We\u2019ll hear how God changed their heart and changed their mind about living together outside of marriage. Stay tuned.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Tuesday edition. I remember, not long ago, when we had Glenn Stanton joining us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>\u2014we were talking about the issue of co-habitation. He said that the most common path to marriage today goes through a season of living together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Sixty percent of those who get married today have first co-habited. We hear that statistic and we think, \u201cOh, that\u2019s all <em>those<\/em> people, over there.\u201d Well, you know what? It\u2019s people in all walks of life. They\u2019re in church with you\u2014you work with them. These are people who\u2014they\u2019re just living life according to what the cultural drum is beating. They\u2019re marching to its step.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We\u2019ve been hearing a story from a couple, like that, this week\u2014a story from a couple who met on a missions trip. They became sexually-active on the missions trip. They really, except for a few tinges of guilt, they never thought that what they were doing was wrong. They moved in together, as we\u2019ll hear today; and then, God used a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup><\/em> marriage getaway\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>This is a great story.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It is a great story. I don\u2019t want to give it away, but I do want our listeners to remember that this week is the last week you can sign up\u2014or sign someone else up\u2014to attend a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway and save 50 percent off the regular rate. It\u2019s our buy one\/get one free week. The rate is available for <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners. You just have to type my name\u2014type \u201cBOB\u201d\u2014in the promo code box when you fill out the registration for them online; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and say: \u201cI listen to <em>FamilyLife Today. <\/em>We\u2019re interested in going,\u201d or, \u201cI want to sign somebody else up.\u201d You can take advantage of this\u2014buy one\/ get one free. You pay for yourself\u2014and your spouse comes free or your fianc\u00e9 comes free\u2014or you pay for one person \/ the other person comes free. So\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And as a conference, it doesn\u2019t get any better than this. It\u2019s the finest biblical training on marriage and family that I know, anywhere in the world. We\u2019ve had over two-and-a-half million people who have been through the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>. Come\u2014experience a great weekend. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s fun; it\u2019s romantic. It\u2019ll equip you to better go the distance in your marriage. Bring somebody with you, where you can have a spiritual impact in their lives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And if, for some reason, the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> doesn\u2019t work for you this spring\u2014it\u2019s not coming to a city near where you live\u2014I\u2019m pretty sure there\u2019s going to be an <em>Art of Marriage<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> video event happening near you. You can go to FamilyLifeToday.com and click on the link for <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em>. Find out where there\u2019s an event taking place, and you can attend <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> video event. It\u2019s a day-and-a-half long event, usually hosted in a local church or in some other location. If there\u2019s not one of those happening near you, you can host your own.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Host one! Have it at your church, have it in your basement of your home, or your living room. Decide to make an impact on couples like the story you\u2019re going to hear today\u2014they\u2019re all around you. They need someone to give them hope that there is a solution to what they\u2019re facing in marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong><em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> is a day-and-a-half long video event. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe have decided, this week, that we will send you <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> kit, at no cost, if you will order manuals for, at least, five couples and take those five couples through the event. Find out more by going to FamilyLifeToday.com and clicking on the link for <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em>. Whether it\u2019s a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> or an <em>Art of Marriage<\/em> video event\u2014that you host or that you attend\u2014do something for your marriage this spring. Do something to strengthen it\u2014do something to keep it pointed in the right direction. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And Bob, what our listeners need to know\u2014we\u2019ve had almost 400,000 people go through <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> because someone, like you, as a couple, cared enough to host it. It\u2019s very simple to do\u2014we\u2019ll coach you, we\u2019ll equip you, we\u2019ll come alongside you to do it. It\u2019s a great way for you two to have an impact and really push back against the culture.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, again, go to FamilyLifeToday.com for more information. Click on the link for either the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> or <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tToday, we\u2019re going to hear from a couple who has been involved with both of those events\u2014Lance and Jess Miller. They live in Florida\u2014young couple\u2014met on a missions trip, became sexually-active while they were on the missions trip. At the end of the missions trip, they decided they\u2019d just move in together. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou were gone the day that they were in the office, but we gathered the whole staff team together. I had a chance to quiz them on their story.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And this is Part Two of what they shared with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Interview]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You moved to Florida. You didn\u2019t know where you were going to be living.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I moved into his parents\u2019 house with him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, the family just opens up a room; and you can stay there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Both of our families never said anything against us, really.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Does the family know that you guys are sleeping together?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>They pretty much found out because we stayed in the room in the house. I mean, it was pretty\u2014I think it started to get awkward for them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So they never said: \u201cHey, Lance! This is not what you ought to be doing\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Not right away. My mom finally got the courage. About two or three months in\u2014\u2014once I started going by to work and we started doing life\u2014we found out that this is not going to work. My mom said: \u201cLook, you have to get another place. You have to get out of here. It\u2019s causing more hurt.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But her concern was, \u201cYou guys get another place,\u201d not, \u201cYou guys shouldn\u2019t be living together.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Correct. It wasn\u2019t as much on that as: \u201cYou\u2019re hurting. What\u2019s going on here?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Your parents know you were living with a guy\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014in Florida?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Did they ever say anything?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Not a word.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And so you, eventually, move out of the house\u2014the two of you are living together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Are you thinking, \u201cLife is cool\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You thinking, \u201cLife is cool\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I, actually\u2014when I moved there, the first thing I did was create a resume. I sent it to every church in the zip code\u2014like 40 copies of my resume. I got hired right away, and I kept getting phone calls and stuff. I was actually hired to work with kids. When we moved into the apartment, the pastor said: \u201cWait a minute! Are you doing what I think you\u2019re doing?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe said, \u201cYes;\u201d and he said: \u201cYou can\u2019t work with our kids if you can\u2019t live an upstanding life.\u201d That was a very\u2014so, I had already been getting the pressure from the church, a little bit, and held accountable. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, you lost the job. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I\u2019d\u2014well, I still worked for them. They didn\u2019t give up on me, but I could not work with the kids. I could only do my technology skills,\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>\u2014at the time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You\u2019re still playing drums in the church?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But they know you\u2019re living together?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Anybody ever say anything?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>The pastor did. Some people kind of raised their eyebrows a little bit and kind of\u2014nobody really asked us directly, like the pastor.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We talked, earlier, about the fact that the path you guys were on is the common path today.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Most young people live together before they get married. Most young people do not get married having not had sex. So, you were doing what the culture\u2019s doing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Is there anything somebody could have pulled you aside and said that would have caused you to go, \u201cI\u2019m not sure we should be doing this.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I had the thoughts; but I was still believing, \u201cThere won\u2019t be anybody else.\u201d So, I was still talking myself into it. There was the fear\u2014that if I stopped, he would walk away. I knew I didn\u2019t want that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Hadyou guys talked about marriage?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I\u2014one day, I had a friend who was getting married. They had waited, and they were a great example for me; but he didn\u2019t know them as well. I said: \u201cListen. We\u2019ve never talked about it\u2014I want to talk about it. I want to marry you. That\u2019s why I moved here.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What did you think when she said that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I was speechless.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes? Did it begin a dialogue on the subject?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Actually, he asked me if we needed to test it. He said: \u201cSo what? Do we move out, apart from each other, and see if we can manage on our own? And, if we need each other, and come back?\u201d I just started crying.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Because you thought,\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Because I knew\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014\u201cHe\u2019s going to move away.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>\u2014the difference was that he had never seen a good example. My parents had had tough times, growing up and what not; but the topic of divorce never came up. It\u2019s always: \u201cWe stick this out. We\u2019re here\u2014we\u2019re chosen\u2014we\u2019re going.\u201d I didn\u2019t know how it worked, but I knew it could work. We needed to just decide and go for it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes. So how did the two of you\u2014with no marriage plans on the horizon\u2014one conversation. You\u2019ve been living together, for a couple of years, at this point. How\u2019d you wind up at a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Good question.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Well, one of the coolest things that\u2014being an introvert in my job\u2014I get to do\u2014is I get to go to different people\u2019s houses during the day. I drive a service van. While I\u2019m driving a service van, I decided to turn\u2014I\u2019d been flipping through and listening to all the secular stations. I said, \u201cI\u2019m tired of listening to the same song over and over.\u201d Sure enough, <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> comes on. You guys were talking, at the end of the program, about a <em>Weekend to Remember. <\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou said, \u201cLook, if you are a young person or you\u2019re just asking the question about, \u2018Should I get married?\u2019 or want to know more, you <em>need to be<\/em> at this conference.\u201d That\u2019s all it took.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You went home and said, \u201cHey, we\u2019re going to a marriage conference\u201d?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>No! He didn\u2019t tell me! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, you got there, eventually! So, how did you\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>He signed us up, and he took me. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I wanted to try it out. That was the word in my head.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay, so you\u2019re driving to a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway with your boyfriend.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What were you thinking was going on?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I was panicking. I was\u2014I mean, if I was a different person, I might have not gotten in that car. I was freaked out: \u201cThis is for married people. It\u2019s a marriage getaway. What are you doing?\u201d Like: \u201cI don\u2019t know anybody! This is way\u2014I don\u2019t even have a comfort zone in sight<strong>.\u201d <\/strong>[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Were you thinking you were going to walk in and everybody was going to kind of look at you: \u201cWhat are you guys doing?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>We didn\u2019t know what it was like! We thought it was going to be questions and answers: \u201cHow\u2019s it going?\u201d I was like: \u201cWe don\u2019t have anything to talk about! He hasn\u2019t asked me! I don\u2019t know if he wants to marry me!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>When did some light start to come on, over the course of the weekend, for you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I tell you what\u2014Tim and Joy Downs were there. Tim\u2014he just lightened the load, right away, on that second session. I mean, he was just getting everybody laughing. By the end of the session, we were like, \u201cIt\u2019s okay.\u201d I think she even relaxed a little bit.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>A little.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. Yes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And then, the next day, you\u2019re going through everything\u2014doing the projects. Did you go to the pre-married session that next morning?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. That was where we really found out that there\u2019s more than we thought to this marriage thing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I have to preface this by saying: \u201cAfter that first session, I was really just like: \u2018Wow! This is great. There is something more. I\u2019m so glad we\u2019re here.\u2019\u201d It took so much courage for her to keep following me there. I had to kind of\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>He was dragging me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. So, prefacing the second session, we saw it was going to be all-out\u2014guys and girls talk about whatever\u2014about sex, and\u2014we were feeling so guilty\u2014the guilt\u2014that\u2019s where it hit me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>And, I didn\u2019t know what to do with it. We were talking about it\u2014we\u2019re like\u2014she didn\u2019t want to go the second session. I\u2019m like: \u201cLook, I think you should just go. We\u2019re here already. Let\u2019s just go. It\u2019s going to be okay. What\u2019s the worst that can happen?\u201d She was still really on the fence. I said: \u201cLook. We\u2019re going to go ask Tim Downs, right now, what he thinks about it.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI said, \u201cLook, Tim, me and my girlfriend\u2014we\u2019re having sex. We don\u2019t know about this. We\u2019re living together. We don\u2019t know about this\u2014whether to go to this session or not\u2014what do you think?\u201d He just encouraged us. He said, \u201cI think that\u2019s right where you need to be.\u201d So, I encouraged her again. I said, \u201cWe\u2019re going to go,\u201d gave her a hug, and we went to our separate ways.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And for you, that session was an eye-opener. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Jeff Paton was at that session. That guy\u2019s\u2014he\u2019s big!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>He\u2019s big, mentally, too.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>He\u2019s just on there\u2014he shoots straight\u2014and he, literally, looked at us guys. First, he asked: \u201cWho\u2019s not married yet?\u201d or, \u201cWho\u2019s not engaged?\u201d He said, \u201cWhat are you guys waiting for?\u201d I was like, \u201cOkay.\u201d He said, \u201cAre you living together?\u201d He was like, \u201cYou not engaged? What are you waiting for?\u201d That hit me. I\u2019m like, \u201cUh-oh.\u201d I could see where this was going. He said: \u201cIf you are having sex with your girlfriend, you need to stop! You need to go to her and tell her you want to honor her and her body. You need to stop.\u201d He said, \u201cI don\u2019t know how you can stay in the same motel room with her\u2014let alone, sleep in the same bed right now.\u201d And\u2014and that was heavy.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes! [Laughter] When did you ever bring up, with her, what had been talked about in the guys\u2019 section?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I was\u2014it was rolling over my mind what I had to do: \u201cWhat do I have to do? What do I have to do?\u201d So, I mean, it just kept hitting me: \u201cYou got to stop. If you want this \u2018something more\u2019\u2014that they\u2019re talking about, here, at this conference\u2014you have to change\u2014you got to change your behavior.\u201d We were talking about the roles of a man, as the leader, in the morning session. I\u2019m like, \u201cIf that\u2019s going to be my role, I\u2019m going to have to make the decision here.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe went to get in bed that night. I just said: \u201cWait! This is what we talked about in the second session. I don\u2019t\u2026\u201d We kind of talked. I said, \u201cWhat did you guys talk about?\u201d It wasn\u2019t very good for her, but I told her what happened to me. I said, \u201cWe can\u2019t do this.\u201d Luckily, there were two beds in that room. I half gave her a hug, and she started crying. You might have to ask her what she was going through, but\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What were you going through?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I didn\u2019t know. I didn\u2019t understand. I, literally\u2014we had been kind of struggling to stay afloat. I felt like my anchor just walked away from me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You were thinking the relationship\u2019s\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I thought he was on his way out the door. He had rejected the thought of marriage; and now, he was, physically, rejecting me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, when did you realize that wasn\u2019t what was going on?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>It took a period of a couple of months. That was in June. He didn\u2019t propose until August. Somewhere, in between, I kind of figured out where we were going; but it was just very lonely because my love language is physical touch\u2014my number one. He just\u2014we couldn\u2019t even hold hands anymore. He just sat on the other end of the couch<strong>. <\/strong>[Laughter] I really felt isolated.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But you\u2019re living together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes. He slept on the couch.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Wow! Why\u2019d you wait till August, Dude? Come on! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance:<\/strong> I\u2019d no\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Were you just trying to decide, \u201cAm I really\u2014should we really get married?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. It\u2019s like taking the plunge. It\u2019s like going beneath the surface.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Am I going to go or not because I\u2019m facing all these people, telling me: \u201cNothing changes. There\u2019s nothing there.\u201d It\u2014ooh.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, from Saturday night, at the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>, until the honeymoon night, you guys maintained your purity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>How long was that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Eight months. [Applause]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>That\u2019s really hard!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes, it is!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>You know what\u2014yes. You know what did it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>And this is props to the crew who put the manual together, <em>The Purity Promise<\/em>, in there. I pulled that thing out, ripped it out of there, and I signed it with the date. Just the wording in there\u2014just, man, hits you like a ton of bricks\u2014if you\u2019re really going to do this right, then, you\u2019re going to sign it. You\u2019re going to put it on your refrigerator, and you\u2019ll look at it every day.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>And it\u2019s still on our fridge.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Your honeymoon had to be pretty special.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes! They\u2019re\u2014mostly good. There was a lot of guilt that I was dealing with because I knew I hadn\u2019t done it right, and I couldn\u2019t take it back. I had thought\u2014I had tricked myself into believing that, because he was the only one, it wouldn\u2019t matter when it started. On my wedding day, it was very hard to look at him, for a little bit, because, even though it was still just him, it was wrong.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>But, I still have to think that, somehow, in that eight months of living with a commitment to purity, God was at work in your lives\u2014in your relationship. Your spiritual intimacy had to grow by leaps and bounds during that period.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Right, we had to go back to where we started because we came together doing ministry together. We were still involved\u2014but not for the total pure reasons that we needed to be. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe got plugged back into as much ministry as we could together\u2014you know, he plays the drums \/ I run the sound\u2014you know. He designs the stage lighting\u2014you know, just working together for God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You guys have also hosted a couple of <em>Art of Marriage<\/em> events; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Tell us about why you did that and what\u2019s happened.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Well, we go to a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> every year now. We figure: \u201cWe\u2019re never not going to take the time to re-plug into what we need to do.\u201d The next year\u2014when we got to go to our first one, married\u2014which was much better\u2014[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Oh, yes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>\u2014it\u2019s like: \u201cI got this.\u201d Walked in\u2014it was fine. That was when they were announcing the release of <em>Art of Marriage<\/em>. They played the clips, and it was out there. It was really expensive; and I went, \u201cThis is what we need to show.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere are so many young people in our church that our hearts just break for because they\u2019re either doing what we did or they\u2019re about to\u2014you can see it coming. So, I knew we needed to do that. It just struck me; but, at the same time, we knew our church couldn\u2019t afford it. We had a heart for it, but we couldn\u2019t get our hands on it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So what happened? How did you wind up doing it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>The radio saved us again. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I heard you, again, on the radio. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>You said, \u201cIf it\u2019s just something you feel like would benefit your church, just tell us the date, and the time, and we\u2019ll get it out to you.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>For free.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. We wouldn\u2019t ever have got it otherwise. I mean\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So how many couples came that first time?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>I think we had ten the first time. We hoped for a small group because we were test running it. We knew it was going to be a regular part of the ministry. The pastor loved the idea: \u201cSure, you want to be marriage ministry leaders. Go for it! Do it.\u201d So, we had a small group; and they loved it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI mean, we had barely-married\u2014they had gotten pregnant, as teenagers, and gotten married because they were pregnant. Then, we had people who wrote on their comments \u201cI wish this was around when I was young.\u201d And you are like, \u201cYes, I wasn\u2019t even there yet; how could I give this to you?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Are you going to do more?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes; definitely. We\u2019re looking at the <em>Stepping Up<\/em><sup>\u2122<\/sup> program. If I had to just go into that, I mean, that\u2019s one of the things, as a young man and being an introvert, I feel like I need permission to be great or to do something bigger. My pastor, coming in and saying, \u201cLook, I can\u2019t groom you for ministry and I can\u2019t have Jess working with kids unless you guys are going to do this right.\u201d He showed me something bigger.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>How about if I give you permission to do <em>Stepping Up<\/em> with the guys? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>I mean\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You good with that?\u00a0 How about if I give you the kit?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>We, actually, have it. You did the free thing again. [Laughter and applause]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Yes. So, it\u2019s on the list. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just want to come bring this back, full circle, and say: \u201cWhat you guys are doing here\u2014and, I mean, from Dennis and Bob, you guys are driving this thing home. Everyone here\u2014from Jim cleaning the bathrooms\u2014is engineering a hope. You guys are doing something amazing. I just can\u2019t thank you enough for what you guys do every day. [Emotion in voice] It\u2019s changed our lives. We\u2019re a living example right here. You\u2019ve changed our family tree.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jess: <\/strong>And we\u2019re helping change others.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lance: <\/strong>Helping change others.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>How about that; huh? [Applause]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We\u2019ve been listening to Lance and Jess Miller. You\u2019re kind of smiling as you hear them tell their story.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Well, you know, changing your family tree\u2014there are a lot of them that need to be changed today, in our country. Here\u2019s the message I want you to hear: \u201cNo matter what condition your family tree is in, there\u2019s hope to, not only change it, but turn it around and have it produce fruit.\u201d Did you hear? That couple <em>is already<\/em> making a difference! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019re giving you all these ways to do it\u2014bring someone to the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>, host an <em>Art of Marriage<\/em>\u2014get <em>Stepping Up<\/em>, and be a part of Super Saturday, and make a difference in a group of men. It\u2019s game time! Step up, and decide what your battle front is, and come join us at a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>, Art of Marriage, or <em>Stepping Up<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Right now, <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> event kit is\u2014like it was when Lance called us to order his\u2014we\u2019re making it available, free, to anyone who will agree to take, at least, five couples through the material. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou order the workbooks for five, or ten, or fifteen \/ twenty couples\u2014however many you have\u2014at least, five. We\u2019ll send you the DVDs and the complete event kit, at no cost to you. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com and click on the link for <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> to take advantage of this special offer. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s available for just a limited time; so go, online, today: FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and say, \u201cHow do I get <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em> kit for free? I heard something about that on the radio.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019re interested in the <em>Weekend to Remember,<\/em> this is the last week to take advantage of the buy one\/get one free special offer we\u2019re making to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners. You sign up to attend an upcoming <em>Weekend to Remember <\/em>marriage getaway, you pay regular rate for yourself; and your spouse comes free. But you have to sign up this week. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGo to FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the link for the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>. When you fill out the online registration form, put my name\u2014put \u201cBOB\u201d\u2014in the online promo code box. Or simply call 1-800-FL-TODAY and say: \u201cI\u2019m interested in the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>. I want to take advantage of the special offer that I heard about on the radio.\u201d We\u2019ll get you all taken care of and answer any questions you might have. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we hope to see you in Hershey, on Valentine\u2019s weekend, with Dennis, and me, and the Wilsons\u2014or at any of our upcoming <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaways this spring.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to introduce you to another couple who came to a very dark spot in their marriage. In fact, they came to a spot where it was not clear whether their marriage could survive. We\u2019ll introduce you to David and Kim Scott tomorrow and hear another remarkable story of God\u2019s redeeming work in the life of this couple. I hope you can tune in for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2014 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/302910","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=302910"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=302910"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=302910"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=302910"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=302910"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=302910"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=302910"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}