{"id":302784,"date":"2013-07-24T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2013-07-24T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/sexual-temptation\/"},"modified":"2013-07-24T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2013-07-24T15:00:00","slug":"sexual-temptation","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/sexual-temptation\/","title":{"rendered":"Sexual Temptation"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>David White talks about sexual temptation and the reality that obedience isn\u2019t easy for married men or singles.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2013-07-24.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"22.89M","filesize_raw":"24003431","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2826],"tags":[5019,4271,5297],"podcast_series":[7962],"cwp_profile":[3465],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302784","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-men","tag-alcoholism","tag-sin","tag-tempatation","podcast_series-sexual-sanity-for-men","cwp_profile-david-white","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302784\/sexual-temptation","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302784\/sexual-temptation","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"u3zbwu1JY6\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/sexual-temptation\/\">Sexual Temptation<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/sexual-temptation\/embed\/#?secret=u3zbwu1JY6\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Sexual Temptation&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"u3zbwu1JY6\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2013-07-24.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2013-07-24.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Sexual confusion is nothing new in the 21<sup>st<\/sup> century. It\u2019s been around for millennia. In fact, author, David White, says that, for as long as there have been fathers and sons, there have needed to be candid conversations about how you handle your sexuality, as a man. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> I think of a beautiful passage in Proverbs 7, where the father warns his son about the adulteress and is really straight-up with him about what she\u2019s offering to him\u2014how good it looks. You know, there\u2019s almost a sense of, \u201cWhy would you not go for this experience?\u201d but he talks him all the way through. The conclusion is: \u201cThis is going to lead to death. Look at this guy. He was like an ox being led to the slaughter.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Wednesday, July 24<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. David White joins us today to talk about how we cultivate a heart of purity in a culture that\u2019s gone crazy about sex. Stay tuned. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. May be providential\u2014what we\u2019re going to be talking about, here, today\u2014because I\u2019m getting ready to have just a short road trip with one of my sons\u2014one of my unmarried sons\u2014but soon-to-be-married son. And I\u2019m just\u2014as I was thinking about what we\u2019re talking about, I thought, \u201cWe should probably have some dialogue about some of the traps that are ahead for him,\u201d because you often think, \u201cOnce I get to marriage, the traps go away because then\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It\u2019s like temptations stop, at that point. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014\u201cbecause sexual fulfillment will be there and available to me.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, we have the author of <em>Sexual Sanity for Men.<\/em> David White joins us again on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. David, welcome back. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Thank you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> David is the Men\u2019s Ministry Coordinator for Harvest USA, which ministers to both sexually-broken men and women in a number of cities across the country. He is married to Jennifer. He\u2019s created a book, here, that is both a devotional, a mentor\u2019s guide, and a small group study that men can use to get free of this. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob\u2019s about to go on this trip with his son\u2014what coaching would you give him, knowing what you know, kind of from your ministry\u2014and your ministry is unique because you are looking at kind of the dark side of how men have been sexually-abused, have used sex as an addiction or an idol in their lives\u2014what would you encourage Bob to say to his son about how to view sex after he gets married? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes. That\u2019s a great question. There\u2019s such an importance for your son to live chastely now because he\u2019s going to have to continue to live chastely in marriage. He\u2019ll be able to have sex but not all the time. You know, marriage will not be the cornucopia of sexual delight that he may be hoping. There is still going to be self-control necessary in marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo many singles need to unlearn their expectations and realize the only how-to passage, I\u2019m aware of, in Scripture is First Corinthians 7\u2014that basically teaches sex isn\u2019t about your own satisfaction. It\u2019s about pleasing your spouse. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> So, it really is about moving toward his spouse in love, serving her\u2014not the way the world paints sexuality\u2014which is, \u201cIt\u2019s all about you.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> So, the sacrifice he\u2019s practicing, as a single man, hopefully, will be the same self-sacrifice he\u2019ll practice later on, as a married man. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, we\u2019ve already talked this week about the fact that all of us are sexually- broken people. So, every married man is dealing with his own sexual brokenness. That\u2019s going to leak through, in a variety of ways, in a marriage relationship. What seemed to be a gravitational pull, toward one another, prior to marriage, can sometimes\u2014it\u2019s like somebody flipped the magnet. You\u2019re shocked by it, in marriage, finding that: \u201cI thought this was going to be easy. This is much harder than I thought it was going to be.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes, I sat with a man\u2014just a few weeks ago\u2014who is in his 50\u2019s\u2014been married for a couple of decades\u2014and was talking to me about his frustrations in his sex life and saying, \u201cWell, it was supposed to be easy.\u201d I said, \u201cWhere did you hear that?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> \u201cWho told you it was supposed to be easy? No, it takes work.\u201d And that\u2019s where\u2014I even have some concern with some of the ways we teach abstinence to kids because we tell them, \u201cOh, if you just wait until marriage, your honeymoon is going to be incredible!\u201d Well, no. Your honeymoon\u2014it\u2019ll be very sweet. There\u2019s going to be things that are going to be wonderful. It\u2019s also going to be a little awkward and clunky. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s kind of like we want to co-op the world\u2019s ways and the world\u2019s message: \u201cIf you just wait, it\u2019ll be <em>awesome<\/em> when you get to that moment.\u201d No, no, no. God\u2019s way is: \u201cGive it years. Give it decades. Keep growing in love for each other. Keep growing emotionally and spiritually together. Eventually, you\u2019ll start to see the glory that I have for you in this.\u201d It\u2019s completely opposite. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You use a story or a word picture of a snake and a mouse to counsel someone who feels defeated by recurring sexual sin. Share that with our audience. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Well, I was having breakfast with a man once. He shared this chilling tale of his college days, when he owned a snake. It was\u2014feeding time was always a big deal on his dorm floor. They would section off an area and drop a mouse in with the snake. The mouse would immediately know the snake was there\u2014start running the perimeter, desperate to escape\u2014and then, finally, realize there\u2019s no way out. He would come and stand, trembling, in front of the snake, waiting for the strike to come. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m sitting there, saying: \u201cYou know, I\u2019m trying to eat my eggs here. What are you doing telling me this over breakfast?\u201d But he said to me: \u201cI am that mouse. When it comes to sexual sin, I am that mouse.\u201d And the thing that hit me was the promise, from Genesis 3, that one was going to come to crush the head of the serpent\u2014that, in your temptations, you are never left alone to face them alone. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You don\u2019t have to go stand and just say: \u201cI\u2019m going to cave in. I\u2019m going to give in.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> He came to liberate you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes, absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> The only way the mouse is safe in the cage is if somebody kills the snake. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Oh, yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> But that\u2019s the point you are making. Somebody has killed the snake. Now, a guy will hear me say that and go, \u201cOkay; so, if Jesus has killed the snake, why do I still find myself being swallowed up by my sin?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes, there is a\u2014you know, we love to run to the passage in First Corinthians 10 that says, \u201cTemptation is common to man; and in every temptation, there is a way of escape.\u201d We like to stop there. We picture it as, \u201cThere is a bull charging\u2014let me find the hole in the fence and escape.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> \u201cLet me get choppered out of here.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u201cIf I just try hard enough, I\u2019m out of here.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Right. And the verse goes on to say, \u201cso that you can bear up\u201d\u2014so that you can stand under it, so that you can stay on your feet. And the reality is you still need to stay there with the bull; but the ultimate Matador, with the sword, comes in the middle and saves you in the midst of that. The bottom line is we want obedience to be easy, and there is always a way in which it\u2019s going to feel like death. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat brings us back to where we started the conversation about your son. The lie is, \u201cI go to sexual sin because of my hormones.\u201d You know: \u201cI just don\u2019t have an outlet. So, once I get married, it won\u2019t be a problem.\u201d We go to sexual sin when life isn\u2019t working the way we want, and we are trying to find some escape from our life\u2014some way of comforting ourselves. Marriage has a way of turning up pressure, as you guys know. So, it doesn\u2019t make sexual sin easier; it can, in some ways, make it harder. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> So, the guy, who is listening right now\u2014who, last night, after everybody was in bed, just surfed for a while and went some places\u2014that, this morning, he got up and said, \u201cI shouldn\u2019t have done that.\u201d He felt bad\u2014he felt guilty, \u201cI\u2019m not going to do that again.\u201d But he knows that he\u2019s got this pattern: He quits for a while, and he\u2019s back. He quits for a while, and he\u2019s back. He goes: \u201cI run around for a while. Then, I go and stand in front of the snake.\u201d How do you help this guy get free? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> What you\u2019re really asking there, Bob, is, \u201cWhy do we do what we do?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. Good point. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Okay. He has an illustration in the book that I want you to share because I think this really will help a lot of guys unlock and understand <em>why<\/em> they really do what they do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> So, the example we use, as a ministry at Harvest USA, is what we call the Tree Model. It\u2019s based off of biblical passages\u2014like Psalm 1, that talk about \u201ca tree planted by streams of living water\u201d\u2014by passages, like Jesus saying, \u201cA tree is known by its fruit,\u201d \u2014that our behaviors, our words\u2014all of those things come out of our heart. The point of the model is that we live out of a worldview. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, all of us\u2014if you are a Christian, you\u2019ve got an Orthodox statement of faith. We have some differences and what not, but most of us would agree on the same\u2014you know\u2014the basic points; but we don\u2019t always live out of what I call our official theology. We have a functional theology that is often at work. That\u2019s really what we need to start targeting\u2014where our functional theology comes to the fore. There are lots of pieces that go together that form this worldview\u2014this functional theology. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And is the worldview\u2014is that the tree you\u2019re talking about? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes, the trunk of the tree is the worldview. That\u2019s, ultimately, what produces the fruit. So many times, what we go after is behaviorism. We try to change specific behaviors, but we don\u2019t start addressing the beliefs that are behind those behaviors. So, here would be an example\u2014working with a man, who is in danger of losing his job. Okay. He, often\u2014when he can\u2019t sleep at night, because his mind is racing about what\u2019s going on\u2014he\u2019s tempted to go look at pornography online. The prayer is: \u201cLord, I don\u2019t want to look at porn. I don\u2019t want to look at porn.\u201d He ends up in this white-knuckling, \u201cHelp me not sin!\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat we need to realize is the bigger issue is the fear of the future\u2014the sense of insecurity, the loss of identity\u2014all of these things that can come with losing a job. That\u2019s the conversation he needs to have with his loving, Heavenly Father and not just worrying about not acting out. Until we start seeing those beliefs that are going on\u2014the fears, the insecurities, the frustrations\u2014we aren\u2019t actually having the conversations with God we need to have. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> It\u2019s really asking the question, \u201cWhy do I think this is going to be a satisfying experience?\u201d Whatever the sexual sin is\u2014\u201cWhat is it in me that believes that this is going to be something that I\u2019m going to find delight in?\u201d Well, we know that there is some level of physical delight. There\u2019s some level of neuro-chemical delight going on when we\u2019re exposed to sexual stimulation; but what we forget is that the pleasure that is sin for a season has a fruit behind it that is a bitter fruit; right? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes. There is always sowing and reaping going on with our lives. You know, you sow at a different season; and then, you reap later what is going to happen. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Back to the tree model\u2014I want you to explain kind of the different components that are in that model. You\u2019ve got the soil, the roots, the fruit, the seeds, and the shoot. Explain, \u201cWhat\u2019s the soil?\u201d\u2014what\u2019s that all about? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Okay. So, the soil is all the aspects of life that are outside of your control. As we all know, there\u2019s a whole lot of life that is outside of our control that impacts us. So, we help men think through issues in their family of origin, growing up. We have men consider how their personality and gifts impact their view of the world and how they\u2019ve been responded to by others. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> They might have been sexually-abused as a boy\u2014that\u2019d be a part of the soil; right? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Sure. Abuse is a <em>significant<\/em>, significant factor\u2014the culture that they were raised in\u2014the expectations of: \u201cWhat does it mean to be a man? What does it mean to be male?\u201d All of these things impact how you view yourself, how you view the world. We want to talk through, with them, particularly, how they view God because all of us have come to conclusions, out of the experience of our lives. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnother aspect of the model is that, within this soil of a world that has so much outside of your control, the seed is the human heart, that is planted in that soil. From a biblical standpoint, our heart is fallen. It\u2019s not neutral. You know, it doesn\u2019t turn to God on its own. So, we end up making choices to satisfy ourselves the best we can from the soil that we are planted in. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> So, the seed starts to grow and sinks roots into where we\u2019ve come from\u2014and something\u2014outside of who God is\u2014that\u2019s not going to be a good result. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Exactly. And that\u2019s where we end up with a <em>functional<\/em> theology\u2014that for most of us, after we come to faith and we understand the Gospel, there is still\u2014really deep in our understanding of life\u2014a very different belief system going on. So, it\u2019s starting to identify that\u2014that enables me to turn, ultimately, away from my sins. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to help men begin to think through: \u201cWhat are the triggers in their lives? What are the situations that make them anxious or frustrated? What are the memories that are filled with lots of pain?\u201d\u2014for them to begin to understand: \u201cWhen life hits them a certain way \/ when their wife makes a comment\u2014it triggers something in them from ten years ago.\u201d They need to start realizing: \u201cWait a minute! This is not about my wife.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI love that you guys start the\u2014at least, you used to\u2014the <em>Weekend to Remembers<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> with, \u201cYour spouse is not your enemy.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> You know because so often we\u2019re bringing so much baggage to the table that we\u2019re not even hearing right what is being said. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I have a friend of mine, who, for years, was an alcoholic\u2014got sober, thankfully, now, 35 years ago. One of the things he said to me\u2014he said, \u201cI learned, going to AA meetings, that there is acronym they use that\u2019s HALT\u2014that you are vulnerable when you are hungry, or angry, or lonely, or tired.\u201d I thought, \u201cThat is helpful.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can look at my own life and see that when I\u2019m weak, when I\u2019m vulnerable, I am more susceptible to temptation\u2014to giving in. Is that too simplistic to say, \u201cIt\u2019s when you\u2019re hungry, angry, lonely, tired,\u201d\u2014am I still not looking deep enough; do you think? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Well, I think all those current circumstances matter. So, I think that is, for any of us\u2014that can be a part of it. You know, absolutely. Hungry, angry, lonely, tired applies to all of us. And there are\u2014I guess there are deeper aspects, as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I can imagine there is a mom or dad listening to this conversation, and they are thinking about their kids. You know, I\u2019ve got 19 grandkids. I mean, they are scattered from age\u2014well, let\u2019s see. It\u2019s about\u2014I think the youngest is a little over one, and the oldest is thirteen. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Wow. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And I can imagine my kids, thinking about raising these kids in this culture; and they are wondering, \u201cThere\u2019s a lot, outside of my control, as I raise these kids, that could happen to them.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> How would you coach parents, then, not just merely to protect their kids from all the evil\u2014because they need to do that\u2014but what else do they need to provide for children today in the midst of this soil of this culture? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Sure. Parents really need to be proactive, Dennis, in a way that they\u2019ve never been before. I think of a beautiful passage in Proverbs 7, where the father warns his son about the adulteress and is really straight-up with him about what she\u2019s offering to him\u2014how good it looks. There is almost a sense of, \u201cWhy would you not go for this experience?\u201d but he talks him all the way through. The conclusion is: \u201cThis is going to lead to death. Look at this guy. He was like an ox being led to the slaughter.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tParents need to be willing to have candid conversations like that\u2014with their being honest about the struggles in their own hearts. I love how one of the principles at FamilyLife is repentance, and purity, and life. That parents need to be willing to open up to their kids about where they are at with those issues, in age-appropriate ways\u2014talk about their histories and talk about their current struggles. I would say\u2014particularly, with the same-sex child, as you get older\u2014mothers with daughters \/ fathers with sons\u2014and start warning them. It\u2019s not enough to just wall your child in and hope for the best. You need to talk to them about the dangers that are out there so that\u2014when they are at a friend\u2019s house, and pornography is joked about and brought up on a computer\u2014it is seen as: \u201cThis is something I\u2019ve heard about that can kill me. I\u2019m supposed to run now.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It\u2019s interesting that you talked about Proverbs, Chapter 7. I wrote a book called <em>Aggressive Girls, Clueless Boys<\/em>. It\u2019s a book for parents to begin to do what you just described Solomon did with his son\u2014begin to talk with your sons about what they are going to face\u2014in a safe way so that\u2014if they do fail, they can come back, and they can talk about it with you, and you can talk about grace, and forgiveness, and that God cleanses us from all sin. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>But, also, so that they\u2019ll be educated to know that this is coming: \u201cIt\u2019s just a matter of time before you see something or some temptation is put before you that you, as a boy growing into a young man and then a man, you\u2019re going to face this for the rest of your life. And I rather you hear about this from me than from the culture. I\u2019d rather you hear about this from a Christian worldview\u2014from someone who is attempting to follow Christ in my brokenness\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014\u201cthan hear about it from the world.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes, absolutely. It\u2019s amazing\u2014when I visit churches and ask Christian people, \u201cHow many of you were told, growing up, about sexuality?\u201d If half the people raise their hands, it\u2019s a lot. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>David:<\/strong> I mean, parents just don\u2019t talk about this issue with their kids. It is so\u2014it is such a glorious gift from God for them to talk about. It\u2019s such a crucial area of obedience that the next book I\u2019d like to work on\u2014if the publisher is cool with it\u2014is a positive theology of sexuality because I feel like it\u2019s so sorely missing in the Church\u2014that we would really bring out the robust implications that really, ultimately, marriage is pointing to Christ\u2019s relationship to His Church. I mean, there are wonderful things there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> What you\u2019ve done in your book, <em>Sexual Sanity for Men<\/em>, is taken material that you teach guys over a 16-week course and put it in the context of sections of the book that kind of unpack what goes on in this course. You\u2019ve done it in a devotional style so that a guy can work his way through this a little bit each day, as he\u2019s on this journey. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI guess I\u2019m wondering: \u201cHow broken does somebody typically need to be before they\u2019re going to have the courage to pick up a book like this? Or would you say this is something that a guy, who is saying: \u2018I\u2019m doing okay. I mean, I\u2019ve got my issues, like everybody else; but I\u2019m doing okay,\u2019\u2014Does he need to read a book like this?\u2014Do you think?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> I would say that this book could be a valuable resource, really, for any Christian man because all of us are dealing with a sexuality that\u2019s been affected by the Fall. It has had some ramification in your life. And yes, the hope is men would deal with this before it is a problem that\u2019s destroying their life, and their marriage, and everything else\u2014that they would start taking this seriously and walking in obedience. It\u2019s not for the guy who is addicted and completely shipwrecking his life. It\u2019s also for a Christian man, who says, \u201cHey, I know that my heart can be pulled in this direction; and I need wise counsel with this.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Do you think, if somebody announced at church, next week, that there\u2019s going to be a new group forming for guys, going through the book, <em>Sexual Sanity for Men<\/em>\u2014don\u2019t you think there\u2019d be a lot of guys, who are going, \u201cI\u2019m not going anywhere near that group. I mean, I\u2019m going to have to\u2014Come on! I\u2019ve got this thing managed. I\u2019ll just keep going\u201d? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes, I think there needs to be a much broader acknowledgement that these are issues facing the Church. It\u2019s not just men; it\u2019s women also. I always say sexual sin is a gender-neutral pathogen of the soul. So, if leadership is willing to start acknowledging: \u201cWe know these problems are there. We know we need to deal with it\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was really encouraged\u2014I had a friend text me, yesterday, saying, \u201cMy men\u2019s group just finished going through your book. I know there are men in there with significant sexual brokenness; and, then, some who are elders in the church, that are a part of that group and just realized, \u2018We need to take this seriously and go through it.\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I had to smile when you asked the question, Bob, about who should go through this. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I\u2019d say any man who was born [Laughter] because this culture doesn\u2019t discriminate. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014does not nurture you in a godly direction. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It is a broken culture. It\u2019s a broken world. It is filled with all kinds of evil. There are some men, listening to this right now, who are going: \u201cI wasn\u2019t abused. I don\u2019t have a problem with this.\u201d They don\u2019t even <em>know<\/em> because they, perhaps, have never even pulled back to even contemplate how the culture has given a distorted view of masculinity, femininity\u2014how those two merge together and interact together. This isn\u2019t a book about being a husband; but it is a book about being a husband\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Bob:<\/strong> Sure it is. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014because it talks about a man who properly views the gift of his sexuality, as a gift from God, and to use it according to God\u2019s divine command. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, we have copies of David\u2019s book, <em>Sexual Sanity for Men<\/em>, in our <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>Resource Center. We also have copies of Ellen Dycas\u2019s book, <em>Sexual Sanity for Women<\/em>. Both of these books take us deep into what the Scriptures teach us about our sexuality and about God\u2019s design for this good gift He has given us. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com for more information about both books. Again, David White\u2019s book, <em>Sexual Sanity for Men<\/em>\u2014Ellen Dycas\u2019s book, <em>Sexual Sanity for Women<\/em>\u2014our website, again, FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY for more information. You can order over the phone\u2014again, 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then, the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, one of the things I am very grateful for is that we have generous listeners. We have a small group of listeners who are Legacy Partners\u2014who get in touch with us each month and provide financial support for this ministry. The money they provide helps go to defray the costs of producing and syndicating this daily radio program. What they provide doesn\u2019t cover the entire cost of producing and syndicating <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>; but that is supplemented by people who get in touch with us, from time to time, and say: \u201cWe believe in this ministry. God has used it in our lives, and we want to see it continue. We want others to benefit from what we\u2019ve benefitted from.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen somebody goes online to make a gift at FamilyLifeToday.com or they call and make a donation over the phone, that\u2019s what you\u2019re saying to us. We appreciate your generosity and your support of this ministry. This week, if you can make a donation to help support <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, we\u2019d like to say, \u201cThank you,\u201d by making available an audio CD that features a conversation Dennis and I had with Kim and Krickitt Carpenter. A number of years ago, they were in a car wreck; and Krickitt experienced a traumatic brain injury. In fact, when she came out of her unconsciousness, she had lost her memory. She did not remember that she was married and didn\u2019t know her husband. They began the process of seeing what it means \u201c\u2018til death do us part\u201d when you don\u2019t even remember that you made that vow. <br><br>We\u2019d love to share that story with you. All you have to do is go to FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the button that says, \u201cI CARE\u201d, and make a donation. We\u2019ll send the CD out to you, or call 1-800-FL-TODAY. Make a donation over the phone, and ask for the CD called <em>The Vow<\/em>. Again, we\u2019re happy to send it out to you, and we appreciate your support of the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we want to encourage you to join us back again tomorrow. Ellen Dycas is going to be with us. We\u2019re going to talk about <em>Sexual Sanity for Women<\/em>. So, I hope you can tune in for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2013 FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 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White talks about sexual temptation and the reality that obedience isn\u2019t easy for married men or singles.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2013-07-24.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Sexual confusion is nothing new in the 21<sup>st<\/sup> century. It\u2019s been around for millennia. In fact, author, David White, says that, for as long as there have been fathers and sons, there have needed to be candid conversations about how you handle your sexuality, as a man. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> I think of a beautiful passage in Proverbs 7, where the father warns his son about the adulteress and is really straight-up with him about what she\u2019s offering to him\u2014how good it looks. You know, there\u2019s almost a sense of, \u201cWhy would you not go for this experience?\u201d but he talks him all the way through. The conclusion is: \u201cThis is going to lead to death. Look at this guy. He was like an ox being led to the slaughter.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Wednesday, July 24<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. David White joins us today to talk about how we cultivate a heart of purity in a culture that\u2019s gone crazy about sex. Stay tuned. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. May be providential\u2014what we\u2019re going to be talking about, here, today\u2014because I\u2019m getting ready to have just a short road trip with one of my sons\u2014one of my unmarried sons\u2014but soon-to-be-married son. And I\u2019m just\u2014as I was thinking about what we\u2019re talking about, I thought, \u201cWe should probably have some dialogue about some of the traps that are ahead for him,\u201d because you often think, \u201cOnce I get to marriage, the traps go away because then\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It\u2019s like temptations stop, at that point. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014\u201cbecause sexual fulfillment will be there and available to me.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, we have the author of <em>Sexual Sanity for Men.<\/em> David White joins us again on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. David, welcome back. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Thank you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> David is the Men\u2019s Ministry Coordinator for Harvest USA, which ministers to both sexually-broken men and women in a number of cities across the country. He is married to Jennifer. He\u2019s created a book, here, that is both a devotional, a mentor\u2019s guide, and a small group study that men can use to get free of this. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob\u2019s about to go on this trip with his son\u2014what coaching would you give him, knowing what you know, kind of from your ministry\u2014and your ministry is unique because you are looking at kind of the dark side of how men have been sexually-abused, have used sex as an addiction or an idol in their lives\u2014what would you encourage Bob to say to his son about how to view sex after he gets married? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes. That\u2019s a great question. There\u2019s such an importance for your son to live chastely now because he\u2019s going to have to continue to live chastely in marriage. He\u2019ll be able to have sex but not all the time. You know, marriage will not be the cornucopia of sexual delight that he may be hoping. There is still going to be self-control necessary in marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo many singles need to unlearn their expectations and realize the only how-to passage, I\u2019m aware of, in Scripture is First Corinthians 7\u2014that basically teaches sex isn\u2019t about your own satisfaction. It\u2019s about pleasing your spouse. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> So, it really is about moving toward his spouse in love, serving her\u2014not the way the world paints sexuality\u2014which is, \u201cIt\u2019s all about you.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> So, the sacrifice he\u2019s practicing, as a single man, hopefully, will be the same self-sacrifice he\u2019ll practice later on, as a married man. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, we\u2019ve already talked this week about the fact that all of us are sexually- broken people. So, every married man is dealing with his own sexual brokenness. That\u2019s going to leak through, in a variety of ways, in a marriage relationship. What seemed to be a gravitational pull, toward one another, prior to marriage, can sometimes\u2014it\u2019s like somebody flipped the magnet. You\u2019re shocked by it, in marriage, finding that: \u201cI thought this was going to be easy. This is much harder than I thought it was going to be.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes, I sat with a man\u2014just a few weeks ago\u2014who is in his 50\u2019s\u2014been married for a couple of decades\u2014and was talking to me about his frustrations in his sex life and saying, \u201cWell, it was supposed to be easy.\u201d I said, \u201cWhere did you hear that?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> \u201cWho told you it was supposed to be easy? No, it takes work.\u201d And that\u2019s where\u2014I even have some concern with some of the ways we teach abstinence to kids because we tell them, \u201cOh, if you just wait until marriage, your honeymoon is going to be incredible!\u201d Well, no. Your honeymoon\u2014it\u2019ll be very sweet. There\u2019s going to be things that are going to be wonderful. It\u2019s also going to be a little awkward and clunky. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s kind of like we want to co-op the world\u2019s ways and the world\u2019s message: \u201cIf you just wait, it\u2019ll be <em>awesome<\/em> when you get to that moment.\u201d No, no, no. God\u2019s way is: \u201cGive it years. Give it decades. Keep growing in love for each other. Keep growing emotionally and spiritually together. Eventually, you\u2019ll start to see the glory that I have for you in this.\u201d It\u2019s completely opposite. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You use a story or a word picture of a snake and a mouse to counsel someone who feels defeated by recurring sexual sin. Share that with our audience. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Well, I was having breakfast with a man once. He shared this chilling tale of his college days, when he owned a snake. It was\u2014feeding time was always a big deal on his dorm floor. They would section off an area and drop a mouse in with the snake. The mouse would immediately know the snake was there\u2014start running the perimeter, desperate to escape\u2014and then, finally, realize there\u2019s no way out. He would come and stand, trembling, in front of the snake, waiting for the strike to come. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m sitting there, saying: \u201cYou know, I\u2019m trying to eat my eggs here. What are you doing telling me this over breakfast?\u201d But he said to me: \u201cI am that mouse. When it comes to sexual sin, I am that mouse.\u201d And the thing that hit me was the promise, from Genesis 3, that one was going to come to crush the head of the serpent\u2014that, in your temptations, you are never left alone to face them alone. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You don\u2019t have to go stand and just say: \u201cI\u2019m going to cave in. I\u2019m going to give in.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> He came to liberate you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes, absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> The only way the mouse is safe in the cage is if somebody kills the snake. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Oh, yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> But that\u2019s the point you are making. Somebody has killed the snake. Now, a guy will hear me say that and go, \u201cOkay; so, if Jesus has killed the snake, why do I still find myself being swallowed up by my sin?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes, there is a\u2014you know, we love to run to the passage in First Corinthians 10 that says, \u201cTemptation is common to man; and in every temptation, there is a way of escape.\u201d We like to stop there. We picture it as, \u201cThere is a bull charging\u2014let me find the hole in the fence and escape.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> \u201cLet me get choppered out of here.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u201cIf I just try hard enough, I\u2019m out of here.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Right. And the verse goes on to say, \u201cso that you can bear up\u201d\u2014so that you can stand under it, so that you can stay on your feet. And the reality is you still need to stay there with the bull; but the ultimate Matador, with the sword, comes in the middle and saves you in the midst of that. The bottom line is we want obedience to be easy, and there is always a way in which it\u2019s going to feel like death. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat brings us back to where we started the conversation about your son. The lie is, \u201cI go to sexual sin because of my hormones.\u201d You know: \u201cI just don\u2019t have an outlet. So, once I get married, it won\u2019t be a problem.\u201d We go to sexual sin when life isn\u2019t working the way we want, and we are trying to find some escape from our life\u2014some way of comforting ourselves. Marriage has a way of turning up pressure, as you guys know. So, it doesn\u2019t make sexual sin easier; it can, in some ways, make it harder. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> So, the guy, who is listening right now\u2014who, last night, after everybody was in bed, just surfed for a while and went some places\u2014that, this morning, he got up and said, \u201cI shouldn\u2019t have done that.\u201d He felt bad\u2014he felt guilty, \u201cI\u2019m not going to do that again.\u201d But he knows that he\u2019s got this pattern: He quits for a while, and he\u2019s back. He quits for a while, and he\u2019s back. He goes: \u201cI run around for a while. Then, I go and stand in front of the snake.\u201d How do you help this guy get free? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> What you\u2019re really asking there, Bob, is, \u201cWhy do we do what we do?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. Good point. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Okay. He has an illustration in the book that I want you to share because I think this really will help a lot of guys unlock and understand <em>why<\/em> they really do what they do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> So, the example we use, as a ministry at Harvest USA, is what we call the Tree Model. It\u2019s based off of biblical passages\u2014like Psalm 1, that talk about \u201ca tree planted by streams of living water\u201d\u2014by passages, like Jesus saying, \u201cA tree is known by its fruit,\u201d \u2014that our behaviors, our words\u2014all of those things come out of our heart. The point of the model is that we live out of a worldview. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, all of us\u2014if you are a Christian, you\u2019ve got an Orthodox statement of faith. We have some differences and what not, but most of us would agree on the same\u2014you know\u2014the basic points; but we don\u2019t always live out of what I call our official theology. We have a functional theology that is often at work. That\u2019s really what we need to start targeting\u2014where our functional theology comes to the fore. There are lots of pieces that go together that form this worldview\u2014this functional theology. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And is the worldview\u2014is that the tree you\u2019re talking about? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes, the trunk of the tree is the worldview. That\u2019s, ultimately, what produces the fruit. So many times, what we go after is behaviorism. We try to change specific behaviors, but we don\u2019t start addressing the beliefs that are behind those behaviors. So, here would be an example\u2014working with a man, who is in danger of losing his job. Okay. He, often\u2014when he can\u2019t sleep at night, because his mind is racing about what\u2019s going on\u2014he\u2019s tempted to go look at pornography online. The prayer is: \u201cLord, I don\u2019t want to look at porn. I don\u2019t want to look at porn.\u201d He ends up in this white-knuckling, \u201cHelp me not sin!\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat we need to realize is the bigger issue is the fear of the future\u2014the sense of insecurity, the loss of identity\u2014all of these things that can come with losing a job. That\u2019s the conversation he needs to have with his loving, Heavenly Father and not just worrying about not acting out. Until we start seeing those beliefs that are going on\u2014the fears, the insecurities, the frustrations\u2014we aren\u2019t actually having the conversations with God we need to have. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> It\u2019s really asking the question, \u201cWhy do I think this is going to be a satisfying experience?\u201d Whatever the sexual sin is\u2014\u201cWhat is it in me that believes that this is going to be something that I\u2019m going to find delight in?\u201d Well, we know that there is some level of physical delight. There\u2019s some level of neuro-chemical delight going on when we\u2019re exposed to sexual stimulation; but what we forget is that the pleasure that is sin for a season has a fruit behind it that is a bitter fruit; right? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes. There is always sowing and reaping going on with our lives. You know, you sow at a different season; and then, you reap later what is going to happen. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Back to the tree model\u2014I want you to explain kind of the different components that are in that model. You\u2019ve got the soil, the roots, the fruit, the seeds, and the shoot. Explain, \u201cWhat\u2019s the soil?\u201d\u2014what\u2019s that all about? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Okay. So, the soil is all the aspects of life that are outside of your control. As we all know, there\u2019s a whole lot of life that is outside of our control that impacts us. So, we help men think through issues in their family of origin, growing up. We have men consider how their personality and gifts impact their view of the world and how they\u2019ve been responded to by others. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> They might have been sexually-abused as a boy\u2014that\u2019d be a part of the soil; right? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Sure. Abuse is a <em>significant<\/em>, significant factor\u2014the culture that they were raised in\u2014the expectations of: \u201cWhat does it mean to be a man? What does it mean to be male?\u201d All of these things impact how you view yourself, how you view the world. We want to talk through, with them, particularly, how they view God because all of us have come to conclusions, out of the experience of our lives. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnother aspect of the model is that, within this soil of a world that has so much outside of your control, the seed is the human heart, that is planted in that soil. From a biblical standpoint, our heart is fallen. It\u2019s not neutral. You know, it doesn\u2019t turn to God on its own. So, we end up making choices to satisfy ourselves the best we can from the soil that we are planted in. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> So, the seed starts to grow and sinks roots into where we\u2019ve come from\u2014and something\u2014outside of who God is\u2014that\u2019s not going to be a good result. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Exactly. And that\u2019s where we end up with a <em>functional<\/em> theology\u2014that for most of us, after we come to faith and we understand the Gospel, there is still\u2014really deep in our understanding of life\u2014a very different belief system going on. So, it\u2019s starting to identify that\u2014that enables me to turn, ultimately, away from my sins. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to help men begin to think through: \u201cWhat are the triggers in their lives? What are the situations that make them anxious or frustrated? What are the memories that are filled with lots of pain?\u201d\u2014for them to begin to understand: \u201cWhen life hits them a certain way \/ when their wife makes a comment\u2014it triggers something in them from ten years ago.\u201d They need to start realizing: \u201cWait a minute! This is not about my wife.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI love that you guys start the\u2014at least, you used to\u2014the <em>Weekend to Remembers<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> with, \u201cYour spouse is not your enemy.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> You know because so often we\u2019re bringing so much baggage to the table that we\u2019re not even hearing right what is being said. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I have a friend of mine, who, for years, was an alcoholic\u2014got sober, thankfully, now, 35 years ago. One of the things he said to me\u2014he said, \u201cI learned, going to AA meetings, that there is acronym they use that\u2019s HALT\u2014that you are vulnerable when you are hungry, or angry, or lonely, or tired.\u201d I thought, \u201cThat is helpful.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can look at my own life and see that when I\u2019m weak, when I\u2019m vulnerable, I am more susceptible to temptation\u2014to giving in. Is that too simplistic to say, \u201cIt\u2019s when you\u2019re hungry, angry, lonely, tired,\u201d\u2014am I still not looking deep enough; do you think? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Well, I think all those current circumstances matter. So, I think that is, for any of us\u2014that can be a part of it. You know, absolutely. Hungry, angry, lonely, tired applies to all of us. And there are\u2014I guess there are deeper aspects, as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I can imagine there is a mom or dad listening to this conversation, and they are thinking about their kids. You know, I\u2019ve got 19 grandkids. I mean, they are scattered from age\u2014well, let\u2019s see. It\u2019s about\u2014I think the youngest is a little over one, and the oldest is thirteen. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Wow. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And I can imagine my kids, thinking about raising these kids in this culture; and they are wondering, \u201cThere\u2019s a lot, outside of my control, as I raise these kids, that could happen to them.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> How would you coach parents, then, not just merely to protect their kids from all the evil\u2014because they need to do that\u2014but what else do they need to provide for children today in the midst of this soil of this culture? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Sure. Parents really need to be proactive, Dennis, in a way that they\u2019ve never been before. I think of a beautiful passage in Proverbs 7, where the father warns his son about the adulteress and is really straight-up with him about what she\u2019s offering to him\u2014how good it looks. There is almost a sense of, \u201cWhy would you not go for this experience?\u201d but he talks him all the way through. The conclusion is: \u201cThis is going to lead to death. Look at this guy. He was like an ox being led to the slaughter.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tParents need to be willing to have candid conversations like that\u2014with their being honest about the struggles in their own hearts. I love how one of the principles at FamilyLife is repentance, and purity, and life. That parents need to be willing to open up to their kids about where they are at with those issues, in age-appropriate ways\u2014talk about their histories and talk about their current struggles. I would say\u2014particularly, with the same-sex child, as you get older\u2014mothers with daughters \/ fathers with sons\u2014and start warning them. It\u2019s not enough to just wall your child in and hope for the best. You need to talk to them about the dangers that are out there so that\u2014when they are at a friend\u2019s house, and pornography is joked about and brought up on a computer\u2014it is seen as: \u201cThis is something I\u2019ve heard about that can kill me. I\u2019m supposed to run now.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It\u2019s interesting that you talked about Proverbs, Chapter 7. I wrote a book called <em>Aggressive Girls, Clueless Boys<\/em>. It\u2019s a book for parents to begin to do what you just described Solomon did with his son\u2014begin to talk with your sons about what they are going to face\u2014in a safe way so that\u2014if they do fail, they can come back, and they can talk about it with you, and you can talk about grace, and forgiveness, and that God cleanses us from all sin. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>But, also, so that they\u2019ll be educated to know that this is coming: \u201cIt\u2019s just a matter of time before you see something or some temptation is put before you that you, as a boy growing into a young man and then a man, you\u2019re going to face this for the rest of your life. And I rather you hear about this from me than from the culture. I\u2019d rather you hear about this from a Christian worldview\u2014from someone who is attempting to follow Christ in my brokenness\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014\u201cthan hear about it from the world.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes, absolutely. It\u2019s amazing\u2014when I visit churches and ask Christian people, \u201cHow many of you were told, growing up, about sexuality?\u201d If half the people raise their hands, it\u2019s a lot. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>David:<\/strong> I mean, parents just don\u2019t talk about this issue with their kids. It is so\u2014it is such a glorious gift from God for them to talk about. It\u2019s such a crucial area of obedience that the next book I\u2019d like to work on\u2014if the publisher is cool with it\u2014is a positive theology of sexuality because I feel like it\u2019s so sorely missing in the Church\u2014that we would really bring out the robust implications that really, ultimately, marriage is pointing to Christ\u2019s relationship to His Church. I mean, there are wonderful things there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> What you\u2019ve done in your book, <em>Sexual Sanity for Men<\/em>, is taken material that you teach guys over a 16-week course and put it in the context of sections of the book that kind of unpack what goes on in this course. You\u2019ve done it in a devotional style so that a guy can work his way through this a little bit each day, as he\u2019s on this journey. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI guess I\u2019m wondering: \u201cHow broken does somebody typically need to be before they\u2019re going to have the courage to pick up a book like this? Or would you say this is something that a guy, who is saying: \u2018I\u2019m doing okay. I mean, I\u2019ve got my issues, like everybody else; but I\u2019m doing okay,\u2019\u2014Does he need to read a book like this?\u2014Do you think?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> I would say that this book could be a valuable resource, really, for any Christian man because all of us are dealing with a sexuality that\u2019s been affected by the Fall. It has had some ramification in your life. And yes, the hope is men would deal with this before it is a problem that\u2019s destroying their life, and their marriage, and everything else\u2014that they would start taking this seriously and walking in obedience. It\u2019s not for the guy who is addicted and completely shipwrecking his life. It\u2019s also for a Christian man, who says, \u201cHey, I know that my heart can be pulled in this direction; and I need wise counsel with this.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Do you think, if somebody announced at church, next week, that there\u2019s going to be a new group forming for guys, going through the book, <em>Sexual Sanity for Men<\/em>\u2014don\u2019t you think there\u2019d be a lot of guys, who are going, \u201cI\u2019m not going anywhere near that group. I mean, I\u2019m going to have to\u2014Come on! I\u2019ve got this thing managed. I\u2019ll just keep going\u201d? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>David:<\/strong> Yes, I think there needs to be a much broader acknowledgement that these are issues facing the Church. It\u2019s not just men; it\u2019s women also. I always say sexual sin is a gender-neutral pathogen of the soul. So, if leadership is willing to start acknowledging: \u201cWe know these problems are there. We know we need to deal with it\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was really encouraged\u2014I had a friend text me, yesterday, saying, \u201cMy men\u2019s group just finished going through your book. I know there are men in there with significant sexual brokenness; and, then, some who are elders in the church, that are a part of that group and just realized, \u2018We need to take this seriously and go through it.\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I had to smile when you asked the question, Bob, about who should go through this. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I\u2019d say any man who was born [Laughter] because this culture doesn\u2019t discriminate. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014does not nurture you in a godly direction. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It is a broken culture. It\u2019s a broken world. It is filled with all kinds of evil. There are some men, listening to this right now, who are going: \u201cI wasn\u2019t abused. I don\u2019t have a problem with this.\u201d They don\u2019t even <em>know<\/em> because they, perhaps, have never even pulled back to even contemplate how the culture has given a distorted view of masculinity, femininity\u2014how those two merge together and interact together. This isn\u2019t a book about being a husband; but it is a book about being a husband\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Bob:<\/strong> Sure it is. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014because it talks about a man who properly views the gift of his sexuality, as a gift from God, and to use it according to God\u2019s divine command. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, we have copies of David\u2019s book, <em>Sexual Sanity for Men<\/em>, in our <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>Resource Center. We also have copies of Ellen Dycas\u2019s book, <em>Sexual Sanity for Women<\/em>. Both of these books take us deep into what the Scriptures teach us about our sexuality and about God\u2019s design for this good gift He has given us. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com for more information about both books. Again, David White\u2019s book, <em>Sexual Sanity for Men<\/em>\u2014Ellen Dycas\u2019s book, <em>Sexual Sanity for Women<\/em>\u2014our website, again, FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY for more information. You can order over the phone\u2014again, 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then, the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, one of the things I am very grateful for is that we have generous listeners. We have a small group of listeners who are Legacy Partners\u2014who get in touch with us each month and provide financial support for this ministry. The money they provide helps go to defray the costs of producing and syndicating this daily radio program. What they provide doesn\u2019t cover the entire cost of producing and syndicating <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>; but that is supplemented by people who get in touch with us, from time to time, and say: \u201cWe believe in this ministry. God has used it in our lives, and we want to see it continue. We want others to benefit from what we\u2019ve benefitted from.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen somebody goes online to make a gift at FamilyLifeToday.com or they call and make a donation over the phone, that\u2019s what you\u2019re saying to us. We appreciate your generosity and your support of this ministry. This week, if you can make a donation to help support <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, we\u2019d like to say, \u201cThank you,\u201d by making available an audio CD that features a conversation Dennis and I had with Kim and Krickitt Carpenter. A number of years ago, they were in a car wreck; and Krickitt experienced a traumatic brain injury. In fact, when she came out of her unconsciousness, she had lost her memory. She did not remember that she was married and didn\u2019t know her husband. They began the process of seeing what it means \u201c\u2018til death do us part\u201d when you don\u2019t even remember that you made that vow. <br><br>We\u2019d love to share that story with you. All you have to do is go to FamilyLifeToday.com. Click the button that says, \u201cI CARE\u201d, and make a donation. We\u2019ll send the CD out to you, or call 1-800-FL-TODAY. Make a donation over the phone, and ask for the CD called <em>The Vow<\/em>. Again, we\u2019re happy to send it out to you, and we appreciate your support of the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we want to encourage you to join us back again tomorrow. Ellen Dycas is going to be with us. We\u2019re going to talk about <em>Sexual Sanity for Women<\/em>. So, I hope you can tune in for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2013 FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/302784","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=302784"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=302784"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=302784"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=302784"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=302784"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=302784"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=302784"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}