{"id":302751,"date":"2013-06-05T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2013-06-05T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/breaking-the-cycle\/"},"modified":"2013-06-05T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2013-06-05T15:00:00","slug":"breaking-the-cycle","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/breaking-the-cycle\/","title":{"rendered":"Breaking the Cycle"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Patrick Morley coaches dads to love, encourage and influence their children while they are under their care.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2013-06-05.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"22.45M","filesize_raw":"23536199","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2827],"tags":[5250,4727,4277],"podcast_series":[7949],"cwp_profile":[3071],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302751","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-repentance","tag-being-a-good-father","tag-dads","tag-fathers","podcast_series-man-alive","cwp_profile-patrick-morley","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302751\/breaking-the-cycle","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302751\/breaking-the-cycle","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"jgMnjrFUaz\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/breaking-the-cycle\/\">Breaking the Cycle<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/breaking-the-cycle\/embed\/#?secret=jgMnjrFUaz\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Breaking the Cycle&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"jgMnjrFUaz\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2013-06-05.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2013-06-05.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Patrick Morley remembers an event that took place, late in his father\u2019s life; but, thankfully, not too late. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> When I was 35 years of age, we were walking to the vehicles. I don\u2019t know why; but I said, \u201cDad, could I have a hug?\u201d Before I finished, he had <em>grabbed me<\/em>, and he hugged me like a grizzly bear. By the time he was done, we were both bawling. So, we pushed back from each other. I said, \u201cI love you, Dad;\u201d and he said, \u201cI love you, too, son.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Wednesday, June 5<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We\u2019ll hear from Patrick Morley today about the incredible power of a father\u2019s words in his son\u2019s life. Stay tuned. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> In 20 years of doing radio, I\u2019ve never done what I\u2019m about to do to the guest, here, on today\u2019s broadcast. That ought to make him feel really special. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Or really scared. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Or really terrified. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I\u2019m a little nervous. What are you going to do? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, I\u2019m going to ask him to do something at the end of the broadcast. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And you\u2019re going to tell him, now, what it\u2019s going to be? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I am. I usually wait until right before the end of the broadcast to tell our guests I want them to do this, but Pat Morley\u2019s a good friend. This could be the end of the friendship, [Laughter] but I\u2019m going to ask him on the frontend; alright? Here\u2019s what I\u2019m going to ask you to do at the end of the broadcast\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Okay. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You shared\u2014in 1926\u2014how your dad was born into a very tough family. His dad abandoned him. He didn\u2019t know how to be a man, husband, father. You grew up in that family. It was pretty tough for you, as a boy. You ran away from home the summer after you had moved through the 10<sup>th<\/sup> grade\u2014didn\u2019t end up graduating from high school. A lot of things had taken place\u2014tough situation with your father. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m going to ask you, at the end of the broadcast, to seat your father across the table from you and give him a tribute. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Oh, that\u2019s easy. Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I bet you can. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Oh, yes; absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I bet it\u2019s easy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Pat Morley is the author of a new book called <em>Man Alive<\/em>. He is the President of Man in the Mirror Ministries, and I want to hear about Man in the Mirror Ministries in just a moment. I\u2019m going to do something else, here, that\u2014just to be\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Bob, can you get him under control? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> No. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I do not\u2014I cannot. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> No, I\u2019m on a roll. I\u2019m on a roll. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> You\u2019re a biscuit. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I like to ask men this question. I\u2014after listening to you, now this week, as we\u2019ve talked\u2014here\u2019s the question, \u201cOut of everything you\u2019ve ever done in all your life, what is <em>the<\/em> most courageous thing you have ever done?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> The most courageous thing that I\u2019ve ever done? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Courage is not the absence of fear. It\u2019s doing your duty in the face of fear. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Yes. Courage, out of Webster\u2019s Dictionary, by the way, is the quality of state of mind or spirit that enables one to face hardship or disaster with confidence and resolution. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI would say that the\u2014my answer to the most courageous thing I ever did was to reconcile with my father\u2014which, maybe, I\u2019ll save to the end of the broadcast because that would be the tribute; or I could go ahead and do it now. You tell me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> We\u2019ll save it for the end of the broadcast. We\u2019ll just let that be the total package, at the end. Share with our listeners about Man in the Mirror Ministries. You\u2019ve written a book by the name of that. That gave birth to a whole movement of men. What\u2019s going on? What\u2019s happening today? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Well, it\u2019s very exciting, Dennis and Bob. First of all, I just want to tell you that David Delk is actually now the President of Man in the Mirror. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And David has been a guest, here, on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> And he\u2019s been a\u2014he\u2019s been a guest here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Wrote a great book called <em>The Marriage Prayer<\/em> and is doing a great job leading the organization. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Oh, he\u2019s phenomenal, along with all of our other staff, but\u2014so, our vision is for every church to disciple every man. What we do is we help churches be more effective in men\u2019s discipleship. We\u2019ve developed a model\u2014over the last 20 years\u2014that produces very substantial results for churches. So, just as a stewardship, we feel a duty to proliferate this model to as many churches as possible. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, big idea: We\u2019re hiring 330 full-time area directors\u2014one for every 1,000 churches, situated geographically, around the United States. The idea is to put boots on the ground\u2014men in community. We still have yet to place one here in Little Rock. Orlando\u2014where we\u2019re located\u2014for example, the area is big enough to have two area directors in Orlando\u2014one, east and one, west. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThese men will essentially develop relationships with a hundred of the churches in the area, over the first three years. That\u2019s about three a month. Then, help them be more effective in reaching men. So, if each of those churches, then, disciples ten new men a year, we\u2019re talking about being able to disciple a million men a year. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s great! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> So, it\u2019s very exciting. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> How are you doing? How many of the\u2014was it three hundred and\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Three hundred thirty. And we\u2019ve\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Three hundred thirty\u2014where are you at? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> \u2014we\u2019ve appointed the first 50. It\u2019s taking about a year. So, you can kind of do the math. It\u2019s steady-plodding kind of thing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut the reason that I\u2019m excited to mention it is because you\u2019re on so many radio stations. There is probably somebody, listening today, who is either interested in this area director position\u2014<em>or<\/em> you have somebody you went to high school with, back over in Raleigh, or maybe a friend, brother-in-law, up in Spokane, Washington\u2014whatever\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, if it resonates\u2014the idea of helping churches to be more effective at discipling men\u2014if that resonates with you, you can go to AreaDirectors.org and get all the information\u2014job description, frequently-asked questions. There is a little video there and just all the information. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We\u2019ll put a link on our website\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Super. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014at FamilyLifeToday.com\u2014for those who want to go there in case they weren\u2019t able to get the link. Just go to FamilyLifeToday.com and click over and find out more about what\u2019s involved in being an area director. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I\u2019m excited about this, Pat, because you\u2019re a kindred spirit with us. We believe the hope of our country is in laymen and women\u2014put the tools in their hands, get out of their way, commission them. Let those who have the passion in their chest\u2014that\u2019s burning to do something about the decline of our nation, spiritually\u2014make a difference where they live. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJust like Nehemiah went back to the city of Jerusalem and rebuilt the wall. He encouraged people to rebuild the wall in front of their own houses. That\u2019s how he got it done in a little more than 50 days. So, I think you are on something big. I hope that men, who are listening today, will take your charge, and a lot of them will explore this, and step out in faith. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> And by the way, we have the full-time position. Just last week, we also launched a part-time position, as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Pat, when a guy has got his relationship with God right\u2014when he\u2019s living in harmony with God\u2014he can still struggle in his relationship with his wife or with his kids. You\u2019ve learned lessons over the years\u201440 years of marriage. You\u2019ve got two kids, four grandkids; right? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> If you were sitting down with a young husband, who is saying, \u201cI\u2019m just struggling here,\u201d and you could offer him some of the counsel of your years of experience, what kind of tips would you pass on to him? What have you learned? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Well, I do mention a number of these in the book, <em>Man Alive<\/em>. Something that is a little bit beyond the book\u2014just so we can go there\u2014a little value added, here, if you will. I think that the most important thing that I would suggest today, to a father, is to let your kids know how much you love them and how much you are proud of them\u2014with a verbal affirmation as often as you can. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think I mentioned earlier about my father not making verbal and physical expressions of affection. That meant that either I repeat the cycle or I break the cycle. Well, I decided that I was going to break the cycle. So, I was there for every single one of my kids\u2019 games. I actually took a job in commercial real estate. I took the job\u2014I took, in part\u2014so that I would be able to be at my children\u2019s events. Now, not every father can do that; but I never missed a single kid\u2019s event. I took every opportunity\u2014in fact, every day, I told my children, \u201cI love you,\u201d and, \u201cI\u2019m proud of you,\u201d\u2014two phrases that I never heard. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, I invited my mom and dad to come to one of my son\u2019s basketball games. He was point guard in high school, and we were sitting in the stands. My mom is sitting next to me. I say to her\u2014I say: \u201cWe\u2019re just so proud of John. The leadership skills he\u2019s learning, the diligence, the industry, the team play. All these qualities and characteristics he\u2019s learning as a point guard. We\u2019re just so proud of him.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, she said to no one in particular\u2014she said, \u201cYou know, when our four boys were growing up, I don\u2019t think we told them often enough that we were proud of them.\u201d I wanted to say: \u201cMom, I\u2019m right here. I was one of those four boys. You know, you can talk to me about it.\u201d But I had these two bombs go off in my head. The first one was: \u201cThat\u2019s right! You didn\u2019t! You could have! It would have been so easy to tell us that you were proud of us! Why didn\u2019t you do that?\u201d The other bomb was: \u201cYou know, it\u2019s not too late, Mom. You can tell me now!\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe little boy and the little girl\u2014<em>they long<\/em> to hear the voice of their mom and their dad to say, \u201cI love you, and I\u2019m proud of you.\u201d There is biblical precedence for this. God said, at the baptism of Jesus, and then, the Transfiguration, \u201cThis is my beloved Son\u201d\u2014I love him\u2014\u2014and, \u201cin whom I\u2019m well pleased\u201d\u2014I\u2019m proud of Him. So, God said, \u201cI love Jesus, and I\u2019m proud of Jesus.\u201d There you go. You\u2019ve got a little biblical precedent for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Alright. Take us back to the husband\u2014young husband. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You took us right to the kids, and I understand why\u2014given the story from your own life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> What relational advice\u2014how do you love your wife well, as a man? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Yes. The basic idea, as men, is that every time you and your wife have any kind of interaction\u2014verbal or non-verbal\u2014you are either making a deposit into her emotional bank account or you are making a withdrawal. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA couple of examples\u2014let\u2019s just say you\u2019ve had a tough day. Alright, you get home. You have your way of letting the family know\u2014your wife know\u2014that you\u2019ve had a tough day. You slam the door as you come in. You kind of throw your lunch pail across the room. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> This is all theoretical, of course. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> You let out a big, masculine sounding\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Noise. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> \u2014noise that imitates a large zoo animal; you know? [Growling noise] So, now\u2014guys, is that a deposit or a withdrawal? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That would be a withdrawal. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Okay. Okay, so, you get it. Now, let\u2019s just say the next morning you feel like a jerk, which of course you are. So, you decide to bring her a cup of coffee in bed. What would that be\u2014besides unheard of? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That would be a deposit. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Besides a miracle! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> That would be a deposit. So, you get the idea. Guys, if your wife is trying to process with you a little spat\u2014that, maybe, one the children had in the neighborhood, or somebody hurt her feelings\u2014and you\u2019re sitting there, with your arms crossed, and looking out the window\u2014that doesn\u2019t send a very good message. That\u2019s a withdrawal. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>The point is there are lots of different ways that you can make deposits into your wife\u2019s emotional bank account. Through research\u2014time and talk are the two things that women say they most wish their husbands would do more of. More time: women will say, \u201cWe don\u2019t spend enough time together; but when we are together, our conversation is not meaningful enough,\u201d\u2014and so, just spending time together. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJohn deButts was the Chairman of AT&amp;T before it broke up in the\u2014at the zenith of his power\u2014he had like a million employees. Not long after he retired, he had to have a leg amputated. He would later tell an interviewer\u2014he said, \u201cYou know, in spite of all that money, all that power, all that influence, do you know\u2014as I was laying there, in my hospital bed\u2014that not one person called me on the phone, sent me a card, or dropped by to visit\u2014but there, at my bedside, attending to my needs, day by day, was the woman that I\u2019d ignored for 30 years.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMen, who have relationships, great responsibilities\u2014the chief responsibility of relationships is time. Give time to whom time is due\u2014so carving out time for\u2014to be with your wife. Here\u2019s the problem\u2014if you take the list of ten things she most likes to do and the list of the ten things he most likes to do\u2014it\u2019s very rare that your top thing will be the same for each person. So, you might have to go down to your fourth, fifth, or even sixth, or seventh interest to find something that you have in common. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMaybe, you both like to go bowling\u2014so, go bowling. Maybe, you like to go out to eat\u2014go out to eat. You know, explore greasy spoons around town or whatever\u2014but find something that you can do together and spend that time together. There are many others, but that\u2019s really the top of the list. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Part of what I hear you saying is that a husband has got to\u2014he\u2019s got to view his wife as the treasure that she is. When you have something that you treasure\u2014that you value, that you esteem\u2014you take care of it. You honor it. You devote time to it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes, and take the words of Paul. He said, \u201cYou nourish her\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And cherish her. Yes, that\u2019s right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014\u201cand cherish her.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That\u2019s right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> The exhortation for us, as men, if you want to be fully alive\u2014like Pat is writing about in his book, <em>Man Alive<\/em>\u2014you deny yourself because you\u2019re not going to do any of this naturally. The default position is \u201cme\u201d\u2014\u201cI want to do what I want to do. I want to please myself.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, before we\u2019re done, here on the broadcast, I want you to come back, in a few moments\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You remember this assignment that Dennis gave you at the beginning of the program? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It was tied to, \u201cWhat\u2019s the most courageous thing you\u2019ve ever done?\u201d [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Dennis? Who\u2019s Dennis? [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes, amnesia has sunk in here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes, I think it has. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I\u2019ll tell you what. Before\u2014we\u2019ll refresh your memory on this\u2014but before we do that, let me tell folks how they can get a copy of your book, which is called <em>Man Alive<\/em>. We\u2019ve got it in our <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>Resource Center. Go, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com and order a copy of Patrick Morley\u2019s book, <em>Man Alive<\/em>. Again, the website, FamilyLifeToday.com; or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY to request a copy, as well\u20141-800-358-6329. That\u2019s 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, then, the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d. Patrick\u2019s book is called <em>Man Alive<\/em>. We also have copies of Dennis Rainey\u2019s book, which is called <em>Stepping Up: A Call to Courageous Manhood<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd this month, we are making that book available to you for free. If you contact us, we\u2019ll send the book out to you. If you\u2019ll just cover the cost of the postage and the handling, we\u2019ll send you a copy of Dennis\u2019s book; and we\u2019ll include with it a DVD that has Session One from the <em>Stepping Up<\/em><sup>\u2122<\/sup> video series for men and the first half of the first session of the <em>Stepping Up<\/em> video event\u2014gives you an idea of what these video sessions are like. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you\u2019ll consider, maybe, getting together with a group of guys over the summer or planning ahead for next fall\u2014and gathering a group and going through the <em>Stepping Up<\/em> video series. It\u2019s powerful material. It\u2019s well-presented. You\u2019ll see that when you order a copy of Dennis\u2019s book, and you get the sampler DVD along with it. All you have to do is cover the cost of the postage and the handling. So, go to FamilyLifeToday.com to request the book and the DVD; and we\u2019ll get that out to you. Or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and ask for the <em>Stepping Up<\/em> book and the sampler DVD. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne more thing, really quickly, \u201cThanks,\u201d to those of you who help support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. We couldn\u2019t do this without you. We depend on your donations to help cover the costs of producing and syndicating this daily radio program. We\u2019d like to say, \u201cThank you,\u201d this month, when you make a donation, by sending you a CD\u2014a message from Dennis on fathers and their children\u2014what a dad can do to protect his sons and daughters, particularly, during the adolescent years. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGo to FamilyLifeToday.com and click the button that says, \u201cI CARE\u201d, to make an online donation; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY to make your donation over the phone. Simply request the CD from Dennis Rainey when you donate, and we\u2019re happy to send it out to you. We appreciate your support of this ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Earlier, on the broadcast, I threw out the gauntlet to Pat Morley\u2014had a tough relationship with his dad\u2014a sweet man, a good man\u2014but he came from a tough background\u2014didn\u2019t have a father himself. So, he didn\u2019t know how to be a husband, a father, or a man, in that regard. So, Pat grew up with some challenges, in that regard. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI said: \u201cCould you seat your father across the table? Bob and I leave the studio; and you seat him, across the table, and give him a verbal tribute.\u201d You instantly said\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Well, let me take you back to when I was 35 years of age. In my\u2014so, I\u2019d left home when I was in the middle of my senior year. I was gone. I was just so wounded. I mean, I didn\u2019t understand anything that had happened to me. My parents didn\u2019t understand it either. They loved me. I know they loved me. They just never told me; okay? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, when I became a Christian, I began to grow. By my early 30\u2019s, I <em>really wanted<\/em> relationship with my dad. I called him on the phone one day. I said: \u201cDad, your birthday is coming up. Could I take you to lunch?\u201d He was so happy to go. We had the most wonderful time. So, that became a tradition. Over the next two or three years, the relationship began to thaw out and become more personal. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen I was 35 years of age, we were walking to the vehicles. I don\u2019t know why; but I said, \u201cDad, could I have a hug?\u201d Before I finished, he had <em>grabbed me<\/em>, and he hugged me like a grizzly bear. By the time he was done, we were both bawling. So, we pushed back from each other. I said, \u201cI love you, Dad.\u201d He said, \u201cI love you, too, son.\u201d <em>That single moment<\/em> completely transformed our entire family lineage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI don\u2019t know what happened in that moment. I guess that probably a century of sorrows bubbled to the surface in his life; but here\u2019s what happened. We started telling each other, all the time, \u201cI love you.\u201d \u201cI love you, Dad.\u201d \u201cI love you, Pat.\u201d \u201cI love you.\u201d \u201cI love you.\u201d My mother and my brothers got wind of this, and they got jealous. They wanted in on it, too. They started saying, \u201cWell, I love you, too.\u201d So, we started telling them that we loved them. Within a few months, our entire family became a family of huggers and verbal expressers of love. It was unbelievable! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLike, I\u2019d be talking to my brother on the phone. I\u2019d say, \u201cWell, I\u2019ve got to go, now.\u201d He\u2019d say, \u201cWell, I love you.\u201d I\u2019d say, \u201cWell, I love you more than you love me.\u201d He\u2019d say: \u201cNo. Well, I said it first.\u201d I said, \u201cYes, but I love you more than you love me.\u201d Then, he\u2019d say: \u201cWell, no, you don\u2019t. I love you more.\u201d Then, he\u2019d hang up the phone just like that. [Laughter] It was bizarre! It was just\u2014I\u2019m not saying it would happen in every situation\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> And so\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And so, right now, I want to seat your father across the table from you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> But I\u2019m just curious\u2014would you say asking your dad to give you a hug\u2014was that the most courageous thing you ever did? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> I am saying that that is among the most courageous things I\u2019ve ever done. Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Took a risk\u2014a relational risk. <br><br><strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Well, you\u2019ve got to remember\u2014I\u2019m, at that point, 35 years\u2014and he\u2019s never parented me in this way. I\u2019m the son, and I\u2019m going to parent him? You know? So, yes\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> So, okay, back to the assignment. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Back to the assignment. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Just address your dad. You\u2019re not talking to me\u2014you\u2019re not talking to Bob. Address your dad, and give him a tribute for what he meant to you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe thing I love about you, Dad, is your decision that your life\u2019s ambition was to not go the way of your dad. You didn\u2019t get the right help along the way, but you had such a good heart and you were such a sweet man. You loved my mother so well\u201456-year marriage. It was awesome! It was awesome. So, it may not have worked out for you with me and my three brothers as well as you would have liked; but you had a <em>great marriage<\/em>, and I know that you had a good heart. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt ended well, Dad, because through Patsy, as you know, I became a Christian. Then, through me, you and Mom became Christians. Then, Robert, before he died of the heroin overdose, we were able to lead him to Jesus. Pete has become a Christian. Then, look at my children and how they are walking with the Lord. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have to say, Dad, that I wish you could be here to see it\u2014us breaking the cycle. It\u2019s just so unfair that you got into a church that did not have a vision to disciple <em>you<\/em> to be a godly man, husband, and father\u2014the thing you went there for, the thing you wanted most\u2014but I did! So, we have broken the cycle. We have been able to set the family lineage on a whole new course, for generations to come. We\u2019ve been able to graft the Gospel back into our family line. It\u2019s because of the courageous decision that you made to break the cycle\u2014to not go the way of your dad. I love you so much, Dad. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI know there are men, listening today, that want to say to their dads, too, how much they love them. So, be blessed, men. Be blessed, and don\u2019t hold back. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2013 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["22.45M"],"filesize_raw":["23536199"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-302751.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-302751.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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Morley coaches dads to love, encourage and influence their children while they are under their care.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2013-06-05.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Patrick Morley remembers an event that took place, late in his father\u2019s life; but, thankfully, not too late. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> When I was 35 years of age, we were walking to the vehicles. I don\u2019t know why; but I said, \u201cDad, could I have a hug?\u201d Before I finished, he had <em>grabbed me<\/em>, and he hugged me like a grizzly bear. By the time he was done, we were both bawling. So, we pushed back from each other. I said, \u201cI love you, Dad;\u201d and he said, \u201cI love you, too, son.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Wednesday, June 5<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We\u2019ll hear from Patrick Morley today about the incredible power of a father\u2019s words in his son\u2019s life. Stay tuned. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> In 20 years of doing radio, I\u2019ve never done what I\u2019m about to do to the guest, here, on today\u2019s broadcast. That ought to make him feel really special. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Or really scared. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Or really terrified. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I\u2019m a little nervous. What are you going to do? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, I\u2019m going to ask him to do something at the end of the broadcast. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And you\u2019re going to tell him, now, what it\u2019s going to be? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I am. I usually wait until right before the end of the broadcast to tell our guests I want them to do this, but Pat Morley\u2019s a good friend. This could be the end of the friendship, [Laughter] but I\u2019m going to ask him on the frontend; alright? Here\u2019s what I\u2019m going to ask you to do at the end of the broadcast\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Okay. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You shared\u2014in 1926\u2014how your dad was born into a very tough family. His dad abandoned him. He didn\u2019t know how to be a man, husband, father. You grew up in that family. It was pretty tough for you, as a boy. You ran away from home the summer after you had moved through the 10<sup>th<\/sup> grade\u2014didn\u2019t end up graduating from high school. A lot of things had taken place\u2014tough situation with your father. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m going to ask you, at the end of the broadcast, to seat your father across the table from you and give him a tribute. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Oh, that\u2019s easy. Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I bet you can. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Oh, yes; absolutely. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I bet it\u2019s easy. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Pat Morley is the author of a new book called <em>Man Alive<\/em>. He is the President of Man in the Mirror Ministries, and I want to hear about Man in the Mirror Ministries in just a moment. I\u2019m going to do something else, here, that\u2014just to be\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Bob, can you get him under control? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> No. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I do not\u2014I cannot. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> No, I\u2019m on a roll. I\u2019m on a roll. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> You\u2019re a biscuit. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I like to ask men this question. I\u2014after listening to you, now this week, as we\u2019ve talked\u2014here\u2019s the question, \u201cOut of everything you\u2019ve ever done in all your life, what is <em>the<\/em> most courageous thing you have ever done?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> The most courageous thing that I\u2019ve ever done? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Courage is not the absence of fear. It\u2019s doing your duty in the face of fear. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Yes. Courage, out of Webster\u2019s Dictionary, by the way, is the quality of state of mind or spirit that enables one to face hardship or disaster with confidence and resolution. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI would say that the\u2014my answer to the most courageous thing I ever did was to reconcile with my father\u2014which, maybe, I\u2019ll save to the end of the broadcast because that would be the tribute; or I could go ahead and do it now. You tell me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> We\u2019ll save it for the end of the broadcast. We\u2019ll just let that be the total package, at the end. Share with our listeners about Man in the Mirror Ministries. You\u2019ve written a book by the name of that. That gave birth to a whole movement of men. What\u2019s going on? What\u2019s happening today? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Well, it\u2019s very exciting, Dennis and Bob. First of all, I just want to tell you that David Delk is actually now the President of Man in the Mirror. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And David has been a guest, here, on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> And he\u2019s been a\u2014he\u2019s been a guest here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Wrote a great book called <em>The Marriage Prayer<\/em> and is doing a great job leading the organization. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Oh, he\u2019s phenomenal, along with all of our other staff, but\u2014so, our vision is for every church to disciple every man. What we do is we help churches be more effective in men\u2019s discipleship. We\u2019ve developed a model\u2014over the last 20 years\u2014that produces very substantial results for churches. So, just as a stewardship, we feel a duty to proliferate this model to as many churches as possible. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, big idea: We\u2019re hiring 330 full-time area directors\u2014one for every 1,000 churches, situated geographically, around the United States. The idea is to put boots on the ground\u2014men in community. We still have yet to place one here in Little Rock. Orlando\u2014where we\u2019re located\u2014for example, the area is big enough to have two area directors in Orlando\u2014one, east and one, west. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThese men will essentially develop relationships with a hundred of the churches in the area, over the first three years. That\u2019s about three a month. Then, help them be more effective in reaching men. So, if each of those churches, then, disciples ten new men a year, we\u2019re talking about being able to disciple a million men a year. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s great! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> So, it\u2019s very exciting. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> How are you doing? How many of the\u2014was it three hundred and\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Three hundred thirty. And we\u2019ve\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Three hundred thirty\u2014where are you at? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> \u2014we\u2019ve appointed the first 50. It\u2019s taking about a year. So, you can kind of do the math. It\u2019s steady-plodding kind of thing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut the reason that I\u2019m excited to mention it is because you\u2019re on so many radio stations. There is probably somebody, listening today, who is either interested in this area director position\u2014<em>or<\/em> you have somebody you went to high school with, back over in Raleigh, or maybe a friend, brother-in-law, up in Spokane, Washington\u2014whatever\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, if it resonates\u2014the idea of helping churches to be more effective at discipling men\u2014if that resonates with you, you can go to AreaDirectors.org and get all the information\u2014job description, frequently-asked questions. There is a little video there and just all the information. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We\u2019ll put a link on our website\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Super. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014at FamilyLifeToday.com\u2014for those who want to go there in case they weren\u2019t able to get the link. Just go to FamilyLifeToday.com and click over and find out more about what\u2019s involved in being an area director. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I\u2019m excited about this, Pat, because you\u2019re a kindred spirit with us. We believe the hope of our country is in laymen and women\u2014put the tools in their hands, get out of their way, commission them. Let those who have the passion in their chest\u2014that\u2019s burning to do something about the decline of our nation, spiritually\u2014make a difference where they live. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJust like Nehemiah went back to the city of Jerusalem and rebuilt the wall. He encouraged people to rebuild the wall in front of their own houses. That\u2019s how he got it done in a little more than 50 days. So, I think you are on something big. I hope that men, who are listening today, will take your charge, and a lot of them will explore this, and step out in faith. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> And by the way, we have the full-time position. Just last week, we also launched a part-time position, as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Pat, when a guy has got his relationship with God right\u2014when he\u2019s living in harmony with God\u2014he can still struggle in his relationship with his wife or with his kids. You\u2019ve learned lessons over the years\u201440 years of marriage. You\u2019ve got two kids, four grandkids; right? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> If you were sitting down with a young husband, who is saying, \u201cI\u2019m just struggling here,\u201d and you could offer him some of the counsel of your years of experience, what kind of tips would you pass on to him? What have you learned? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Well, I do mention a number of these in the book, <em>Man Alive<\/em>. Something that is a little bit beyond the book\u2014just so we can go there\u2014a little value added, here, if you will. I think that the most important thing that I would suggest today, to a father, is to let your kids know how much you love them and how much you are proud of them\u2014with a verbal affirmation as often as you can. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think I mentioned earlier about my father not making verbal and physical expressions of affection. That meant that either I repeat the cycle or I break the cycle. Well, I decided that I was going to break the cycle. So, I was there for every single one of my kids\u2019 games. I actually took a job in commercial real estate. I took the job\u2014I took, in part\u2014so that I would be able to be at my children\u2019s events. Now, not every father can do that; but I never missed a single kid\u2019s event. I took every opportunity\u2014in fact, every day, I told my children, \u201cI love you,\u201d and, \u201cI\u2019m proud of you,\u201d\u2014two phrases that I never heard. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, I invited my mom and dad to come to one of my son\u2019s basketball games. He was point guard in high school, and we were sitting in the stands. My mom is sitting next to me. I say to her\u2014I say: \u201cWe\u2019re just so proud of John. The leadership skills he\u2019s learning, the diligence, the industry, the team play. All these qualities and characteristics he\u2019s learning as a point guard. We\u2019re just so proud of him.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, she said to no one in particular\u2014she said, \u201cYou know, when our four boys were growing up, I don\u2019t think we told them often enough that we were proud of them.\u201d I wanted to say: \u201cMom, I\u2019m right here. I was one of those four boys. You know, you can talk to me about it.\u201d But I had these two bombs go off in my head. The first one was: \u201cThat\u2019s right! You didn\u2019t! You could have! It would have been so easy to tell us that you were proud of us! Why didn\u2019t you do that?\u201d The other bomb was: \u201cYou know, it\u2019s not too late, Mom. You can tell me now!\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe little boy and the little girl\u2014<em>they long<\/em> to hear the voice of their mom and their dad to say, \u201cI love you, and I\u2019m proud of you.\u201d There is biblical precedence for this. God said, at the baptism of Jesus, and then, the Transfiguration, \u201cThis is my beloved Son\u201d\u2014I love him\u2014\u2014and, \u201cin whom I\u2019m well pleased\u201d\u2014I\u2019m proud of Him. So, God said, \u201cI love Jesus, and I\u2019m proud of Jesus.\u201d There you go. You\u2019ve got a little biblical precedent for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Alright. Take us back to the husband\u2014young husband. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You took us right to the kids, and I understand why\u2014given the story from your own life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> What relational advice\u2014how do you love your wife well, as a man? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Yes. The basic idea, as men, is that every time you and your wife have any kind of interaction\u2014verbal or non-verbal\u2014you are either making a deposit into her emotional bank account or you are making a withdrawal. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA couple of examples\u2014let\u2019s just say you\u2019ve had a tough day. Alright, you get home. You have your way of letting the family know\u2014your wife know\u2014that you\u2019ve had a tough day. You slam the door as you come in. You kind of throw your lunch pail across the room. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> This is all theoretical, of course. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> You let out a big, masculine sounding\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Noise. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> \u2014noise that imitates a large zoo animal; you know? [Growling noise] So, now\u2014guys, is that a deposit or a withdrawal? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That would be a withdrawal. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Okay. Okay, so, you get it. Now, let\u2019s just say the next morning you feel like a jerk, which of course you are. So, you decide to bring her a cup of coffee in bed. What would that be\u2014besides unheard of? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That would be a deposit. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Besides a miracle! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> That would be a deposit. So, you get the idea. Guys, if your wife is trying to process with you a little spat\u2014that, maybe, one the children had in the neighborhood, or somebody hurt her feelings\u2014and you\u2019re sitting there, with your arms crossed, and looking out the window\u2014that doesn\u2019t send a very good message. That\u2019s a withdrawal. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>The point is there are lots of different ways that you can make deposits into your wife\u2019s emotional bank account. Through research\u2014time and talk are the two things that women say they most wish their husbands would do more of. More time: women will say, \u201cWe don\u2019t spend enough time together; but when we are together, our conversation is not meaningful enough,\u201d\u2014and so, just spending time together. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJohn deButts was the Chairman of AT&amp;T before it broke up in the\u2014at the zenith of his power\u2014he had like a million employees. Not long after he retired, he had to have a leg amputated. He would later tell an interviewer\u2014he said, \u201cYou know, in spite of all that money, all that power, all that influence, do you know\u2014as I was laying there, in my hospital bed\u2014that not one person called me on the phone, sent me a card, or dropped by to visit\u2014but there, at my bedside, attending to my needs, day by day, was the woman that I\u2019d ignored for 30 years.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMen, who have relationships, great responsibilities\u2014the chief responsibility of relationships is time. Give time to whom time is due\u2014so carving out time for\u2014to be with your wife. Here\u2019s the problem\u2014if you take the list of ten things she most likes to do and the list of the ten things he most likes to do\u2014it\u2019s very rare that your top thing will be the same for each person. So, you might have to go down to your fourth, fifth, or even sixth, or seventh interest to find something that you have in common. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMaybe, you both like to go bowling\u2014so, go bowling. Maybe, you like to go out to eat\u2014go out to eat. You know, explore greasy spoons around town or whatever\u2014but find something that you can do together and spend that time together. There are many others, but that\u2019s really the top of the list. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Part of what I hear you saying is that a husband has got to\u2014he\u2019s got to view his wife as the treasure that she is. When you have something that you treasure\u2014that you value, that you esteem\u2014you take care of it. You honor it. You devote time to it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes, and take the words of Paul. He said, \u201cYou nourish her\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And cherish her. Yes, that\u2019s right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014\u201cand cherish her.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> That\u2019s right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> The exhortation for us, as men, if you want to be fully alive\u2014like Pat is writing about in his book, <em>Man Alive<\/em>\u2014you deny yourself because you\u2019re not going to do any of this naturally. The default position is \u201cme\u201d\u2014\u201cI want to do what I want to do. I want to please myself.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, before we\u2019re done, here on the broadcast, I want you to come back, in a few moments\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You remember this assignment that Dennis gave you at the beginning of the program? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It was tied to, \u201cWhat\u2019s the most courageous thing you\u2019ve ever done?\u201d [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Dennis? Who\u2019s Dennis? [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes, amnesia has sunk in here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes, I think it has. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I\u2019ll tell you what. Before\u2014we\u2019ll refresh your memory on this\u2014but before we do that, let me tell folks how they can get a copy of your book, which is called <em>Man Alive<\/em>. We\u2019ve got it in our <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>Resource Center. Go, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com and order a copy of Patrick Morley\u2019s book, <em>Man Alive<\/em>. Again, the website, FamilyLifeToday.com; or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY to request a copy, as well\u20141-800-358-6329. That\u2019s 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, then, the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d. Patrick\u2019s book is called <em>Man Alive<\/em>. We also have copies of Dennis Rainey\u2019s book, which is called <em>Stepping Up: A Call to Courageous Manhood<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd this month, we are making that book available to you for free. If you contact us, we\u2019ll send the book out to you. If you\u2019ll just cover the cost of the postage and the handling, we\u2019ll send you a copy of Dennis\u2019s book; and we\u2019ll include with it a DVD that has Session One from the <em>Stepping Up<\/em><sup>\u2122<\/sup> video series for men and the first half of the first session of the <em>Stepping Up<\/em> video event\u2014gives you an idea of what these video sessions are like. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you\u2019ll consider, maybe, getting together with a group of guys over the summer or planning ahead for next fall\u2014and gathering a group and going through the <em>Stepping Up<\/em> video series. It\u2019s powerful material. It\u2019s well-presented. You\u2019ll see that when you order a copy of Dennis\u2019s book, and you get the sampler DVD along with it. All you have to do is cover the cost of the postage and the handling. So, go to FamilyLifeToday.com to request the book and the DVD; and we\u2019ll get that out to you. Or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and ask for the <em>Stepping Up<\/em> book and the sampler DVD. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne more thing, really quickly, \u201cThanks,\u201d to those of you who help support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. We couldn\u2019t do this without you. We depend on your donations to help cover the costs of producing and syndicating this daily radio program. We\u2019d like to say, \u201cThank you,\u201d this month, when you make a donation, by sending you a CD\u2014a message from Dennis on fathers and their children\u2014what a dad can do to protect his sons and daughters, particularly, during the adolescent years. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGo to FamilyLifeToday.com and click the button that says, \u201cI CARE\u201d, to make an online donation; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY to make your donation over the phone. Simply request the CD from Dennis Rainey when you donate, and we\u2019re happy to send it out to you. We appreciate your support of this ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Earlier, on the broadcast, I threw out the gauntlet to Pat Morley\u2014had a tough relationship with his dad\u2014a sweet man, a good man\u2014but he came from a tough background\u2014didn\u2019t have a father himself. So, he didn\u2019t know how to be a husband, a father, or a man, in that regard. So, Pat grew up with some challenges, in that regard. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI said: \u201cCould you seat your father across the table? Bob and I leave the studio; and you seat him, across the table, and give him a verbal tribute.\u201d You instantly said\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Well, let me take you back to when I was 35 years of age. In my\u2014so, I\u2019d left home when I was in the middle of my senior year. I was gone. I was just so wounded. I mean, I didn\u2019t understand anything that had happened to me. My parents didn\u2019t understand it either. They loved me. I know they loved me. They just never told me; okay? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, when I became a Christian, I began to grow. By my early 30\u2019s, I <em>really wanted<\/em> relationship with my dad. I called him on the phone one day. I said: \u201cDad, your birthday is coming up. Could I take you to lunch?\u201d He was so happy to go. We had the most wonderful time. So, that became a tradition. Over the next two or three years, the relationship began to thaw out and become more personal. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen I was 35 years of age, we were walking to the vehicles. I don\u2019t know why; but I said, \u201cDad, could I have a hug?\u201d Before I finished, he had <em>grabbed me<\/em>, and he hugged me like a grizzly bear. By the time he was done, we were both bawling. So, we pushed back from each other. I said, \u201cI love you, Dad.\u201d He said, \u201cI love you, too, son.\u201d <em>That single moment<\/em> completely transformed our entire family lineage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI don\u2019t know what happened in that moment. I guess that probably a century of sorrows bubbled to the surface in his life; but here\u2019s what happened. We started telling each other, all the time, \u201cI love you.\u201d \u201cI love you, Dad.\u201d \u201cI love you, Pat.\u201d \u201cI love you.\u201d \u201cI love you.\u201d My mother and my brothers got wind of this, and they got jealous. They wanted in on it, too. They started saying, \u201cWell, I love you, too.\u201d So, we started telling them that we loved them. Within a few months, our entire family became a family of huggers and verbal expressers of love. It was unbelievable! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLike, I\u2019d be talking to my brother on the phone. I\u2019d say, \u201cWell, I\u2019ve got to go, now.\u201d He\u2019d say, \u201cWell, I love you.\u201d I\u2019d say, \u201cWell, I love you more than you love me.\u201d He\u2019d say: \u201cNo. Well, I said it first.\u201d I said, \u201cYes, but I love you more than you love me.\u201d Then, he\u2019d say: \u201cWell, no, you don\u2019t. I love you more.\u201d Then, he\u2019d hang up the phone just like that. [Laughter] It was bizarre! It was just\u2014I\u2019m not saying it would happen in every situation\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> And so\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And so, right now, I want to seat your father across the table from you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> But I\u2019m just curious\u2014would you say asking your dad to give you a hug\u2014was that the most courageous thing you ever did? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> I am saying that that is among the most courageous things I\u2019ve ever done. Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Took a risk\u2014a relational risk. <br><br><strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Well, you\u2019ve got to remember\u2014I\u2019m, at that point, 35 years\u2014and he\u2019s never parented me in this way. I\u2019m the son, and I\u2019m going to parent him? You know? So, yes\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> So, okay, back to the assignment. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> Back to the assignment. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Just address your dad. You\u2019re not talking to me\u2014you\u2019re not talking to Bob. Address your dad, and give him a tribute for what he meant to you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Patrick:<\/strong> \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe thing I love about you, Dad, is your decision that your life\u2019s ambition was to not go the way of your dad. You didn\u2019t get the right help along the way, but you had such a good heart and you were such a sweet man. You loved my mother so well\u201456-year marriage. It was awesome! It was awesome. So, it may not have worked out for you with me and my three brothers as well as you would have liked; but you had a <em>great marriage<\/em>, and I know that you had a good heart. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt ended well, Dad, because through Patsy, as you know, I became a Christian. Then, through me, you and Mom became Christians. Then, Robert, before he died of the heroin overdose, we were able to lead him to Jesus. Pete has become a Christian. Then, look at my children and how they are walking with the Lord. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have to say, Dad, that I wish you could be here to see it\u2014us breaking the cycle. It\u2019s just so unfair that you got into a church that did not have a vision to disciple <em>you<\/em> to be a godly man, husband, and father\u2014the thing you went there for, the thing you wanted most\u2014but I did! So, we have broken the cycle. We have been able to set the family lineage on a whole new course, for generations to come. We\u2019ve been able to graft the Gospel back into our family line. It\u2019s because of the courageous decision that you made to break the cycle\u2014to not go the way of your dad. I love you so much, Dad. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI know there are men, listening today, that want to say to their dads, too, how much they love them. So, be blessed, men. Be blessed, and don\u2019t hold back. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2013 FamilyLife. 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