{"id":302747,"date":"2013-05-28T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2013-05-28T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/its-all-about-mission\/"},"modified":"2013-05-28T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2013-05-28T15:00:00","slug":"its-all-about-mission","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/its-all-about-mission\/","title":{"rendered":"It&#8217;s All About Mission"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>While vital on the battlefield, excellence is especially needed on the home front.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2013-05-28.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"24M","filesize_raw":"25167557","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2826],"tags":[4886],"podcast_series":[7947],"cwp_profile":[9302],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302747","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-men","tag-being-a-leader","podcast_series-the-leaders-code","cwp_profile-donovan-campbell","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302747\/its-all-about-mission","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302747\/its-all-about-mission","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"HFtLoNbEP5\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/its-all-about-mission\/\">It&#8217;s All About Mission<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/its-all-about-mission\/embed\/#?secret=HFtLoNbEP5\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;It&#8217;s All About Mission&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"HFtLoNbEP5\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2013-05-28.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2013-05-28.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> As a young Marine, Donovan Campbell says he learned a lot of lessons about leadership. One of the lessons he learned, as a Marine, was the need for character\u2014for integrity. Here\u2019s Donovan Campbell.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> When I was at Harvard Business School, I had a great job lined up with PepsiCo. I was really excited to start that. And I got a telegram in the mail that said, basically: \u201cCongratulations, Captain Campbell. You have been involuntarily recalled. You need to serve a third tour.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember coming home. I had broken my leg, and I could barely run. I remember talking to my wife and saying, \u201cI know I can get out of this because I can barely run, but when I signed those papers I gave my word.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Tuesday, May 28<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. Donovan Campbell joins us today to talk about lessons he learned on life, manhood, mission, character, and service as a U.S. Marine. Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. Let\u2019s just be honest, right here at the start; okay? There are some guests, some topics, some subjects we\u2019re going to discuss that you\u2019re a little less jazzed about than others.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Bob! Come on! Don\u2019t tell our audience that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We\u2019re going to be talking about\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You\u2019re tipping; you\u2019re tipping\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> If we\u2019re going to be talking about arts and crafts for your toddlers, you\u2019re not going to really engage\u2014[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And you don\u2019t like the shows when we\u2019ve talked to guests about hunting or fishing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Hunting and fishing\u2014I can pretty much take a nap because I know you\u2019re going to be into that. [Laughter] Today\u2019s program is one of those that you\u2019re kind of fired up about.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, you\u2019re not?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, I am, too; but I can smell the testosterone on you today.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I pound the table about leadership because I think as leadership goes in marriages and families, so goes the nation. We have a new friend, here in the studio\u2014who\u2014I\u2019ve been reading his books now for how long, Donovan?\u2014couple years\u2014three years?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Three years, yes. Three years.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Three years, and I\u2019m really delighted to be able to introduce him to our audience. Donovan Campbell joins us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Welcome.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Thank you for having me, and thank you all for listening. I really appreciate it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I read your book, <em>Joker One<\/em>. I kept raving about it\u2014first, to Barbara; and then, I kept hounding Bob. We swung and missed\u2014weren\u2019t able to get you out of Dallas\/Fort Worth\u2014the passport didn\u2019t work\u2014to get into Arkansas out of Texas\u2014and we finally worked through all the red tape to get you in. You\u2019ve written a new book called <em>The Leader\u2019s Code<\/em>. I\u2019m really excited about this book; but first of all, you\u2019ve been married to your wife since 2002. You\u2019re expecting your first son\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Yes, yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You have three daughters.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Three daughters\u2014so it\u2019s a brave new world I\u2019m entering into.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> No doubt about it. I think what makes Donovan unique is he is a graduate of Princeton. He went to Harvard Business School. He has served in the Marines three combat deployments. He\u2019s really a student, not only of the Bible, but also of leadership and really helping all of us non-military types better understand what\u2019s taking place.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Your new book is called <em>The Leader\u2019s Code<\/em>. Here, you\u2019re taking what you\u2019ve seen in Scripture, what you\u2019ve experienced in Ramadi, and what you\u2019re learning in the business world, and kind of putting it all in one package; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> That\u2019s right. What I so love is having served in the Corps and watching the leadership principles that they apply there; and then, taking a step back and saying: \u201cWait a second! They\u2019re just applying the leadership principles that Christ taught us. They have found the truth\u2014not through a study of the Scriptures\u2014but through a study of what works because the truth is the truth\u2014period. And it works\u2014period.\u201d I love that!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You found out a lot about leadership in the Marine Corps.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> I learned a lot the hard way\u2014let me assure you of that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes. I love the way your book starts. In fact, this book is built around several different characteristics of leadership: character, discipline, excellence, service, getting the job done. But your first chapter\u2014this is why I started pounding the table with Bob\u2014your first chapter begins with the theme of leadership called\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Servant Leadership is the introduction and the first chapter is Mission\u2014it\u2019s all about mission.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s important in the military because\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Because the military is the one institution that we have, in America, charged with two things: saving lives and taking lives. It is the one institution that <em>explicitly<\/em> tells the people who join it: \u201cYour life is no longer about yourself. Your life is about something else. It\u2019s bigger and it\u2019s more important than your own happiness or your own comfort. If you have to sacrifice those two things, that is okay.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt is the one institution that still does that; and if you\u2019re going to ask people to do that, they have to know why. They have to know: \u201cWhat is my mission? If you\u2019re going to send me to a foreign nation and ask me to possibly die, it had better be worth it.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Mission statements are kind of big in business these days. You ought to have a mission statement\u2014you ought to know where you\u2019re headed. I\u2019m curious about you, as a father of three girls and soon to be a father of a son, do you understand your mission as a leader in the Campbell household?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> I try. I try. As you may know, with three daughters sometimes my mission can get obscured by the incessant clamoring of my children.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> [Laughter] You haven\u2019t been through the teenage years yet\u2014you really\u2014yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> That\u2019s right; that\u2019s right. So, I can\u2019t complain. It\u2019s a great point. I truly have no idea what\u2019s in store. Christy and I really try to be intentional about this; and we try to say, \u201cLook, our job, as Christians, is to be and make disciples.\u201d So our children\u2014we have a sacred charge to make our children disciples of Christ\u2014and not just that. We have a sacred charge to make our children women\u2014and now, that I\u2019m having a boy\u2014young men of character. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI will tell you that this last year was the first year my wife and I went through and wrote down the goals for each of our children, and the goals for ourselves for the year, and then what we\u2019re going to do to achieve those goals. We tried to be intentional, but we were not nearly where we needed to be.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You said something in your book about mission that I want to read to our audience, and I want you to comment on it. You said, \u201cWithout an overarching, all-encompassing mission that focuses us away from ourselves, we have no compelling reason to serve anything other than ourselves.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> That\u2019s exactly right. The great irony is that the more we serve ourselves, the less likely we are to find ourselves, and the less likely we are to find happiness, purpose, and meaning.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I want you to share the story of that fire fight in Ramadi in 2004, where you came to that discovery.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> So, the thing about combat is\u2014when you first go into it, you think to yourself: \u201cHmm. I\u2019ll probably make it out of this alive. I\u2019m really good at what I do. We\u2019re all highly-trained Marines. We plan well; we execute well. If I just train hard and work hard, we\u2019re going to make it out.\u201d Then, you go into combat; and you realize that that\u2019s not the case, \u201cWe\u2019re going to get wounded.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, there was a moment when I said: \u201cYou know what? It\u2019s not about me making it back. I am essentially already dead.\u201d Now, I\u2019m not focused on myself anymore. I don\u2019t leave the base, every morning, thinking to myself, \u201cHow am I going to come back?\u201d I leave the base every morning, now because I know it\u2019s not about me anymore. I leave the base, now thinking: \u201cHow can I get the job done? How can I take care of my Marines?\u201d No longer is it, \u201cHow can I keep Donovan Campbell alive?\u201d It\u2019s, \u201cHow can I do what I was put here to do, and how can I take care of others as I do it?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know, on a conceptual level, what you\u2019re talking about is easy for me to understand and go, \u201cThat\u2019s the right focus.\u201d On a practical level\u2014when all of a sudden you\u2019re in danger, when you\u2019re in combat and bullets are flying\u2014I would think there\u2019d be some self-preservation instinct that would just kick in.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Well, there is a self-preservation instinct that kicks in, but the shift is kind of two-fold. It\u2019s on a philosophical level. I can, literally, remember a time when I said: \u201cYou know what? I\u2019m probably just going to die, and that\u2019s okay because I\u2019m not here to live. I\u2019m here to take care of my Marines. I\u2019m here to accomplish the mission. That\u2019s what you do as a leader. You don\u2019t serve yourself, period. Okay, got it.\u201d So that was the philosophical shift.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, there are the day-in, day-out tactical decisions; right? The first time where I told myself, \u201cI\u2019m really proud to be a lieutenant,\u201d was when we had an RPG attack on an Army convoy that was sitting right outside this anti-American mosque we had been asked to search in the middle of the day. So, my guys had cordoned it off; another platoon was hitting the mosque. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis Army convoy pulls up. It\u2019s stringing along the street. It\u2019s about 50-feet wide. I\u2019m looking at them; and I\u2019m like: \u201cYou guys are going to get attacked. In fact, we\u2019re all going to get attacked. I promise you, we\u2019re all going to get attacked. We\u2019re just sitting here in midday. That\u2019s just what happens when you sit here in midday in Ramadi.\u201d So I went up to them and said: \u201cYou guys should spread out a little bit. They\u2019re going to hit us, blah, blah, blah.\u201d They didn\u2019t. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSure enough, an RPG hit\u2014blew up one of the tracks. People started scattering everywhere\u2014machine gun fire started raining down. Everyone on the street, who was standing\u2014all of a sudden, they vanished. They\u2019re all taking cover, except two guys. It was me and one other guy. I look across the street. This other guy is standing up straight, and he is running as fast as he can to where the fire is coming from; and I\u2019m doing the exact same thing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are both running, as fast as we can, to where the machine gun fire is coming from because we are both lieutenants. It is our job, while everyone else takes cover, to figure out what is happening so that we can make sure: one, we take effective action; and two, if there\u2019s anyone wounded, we can save them. Our job is to stand up in the middle of fire and run at that fire so that we can take care of others, and we can accomplish the mission. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, you have this philosophical shift\u2014you have this day-in, day-out sort of tactical decisions you have to make, \u201cDo I take cover, or do I run at the machine gun fire?\u201d Sometimes, you do the first. Sometimes, you do the second; but typically, if you\u2019re a leader, you have to do the second.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I\u2019m stunned by the image you\u2019re creating; and yet, as I really listen to what Jesus said, He called us to deny ourselves\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> \u201cTake up your cross and follow Me;\u201d absolutely.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014and to run toward the finish line, and toward enemy fire, and to represent Him\u2014be on a mission. That\u2019s really what you\u2019re calling men and women to do in this book\u2014in their marriages, in their families, at work, in their community.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> That\u2019s exactly right. One of my favorite passages is Matthew 6:19 through 34, where Christ says: \u201cListen. You can\u2019t serve two masters. You\u2019re either going to love one or you\u2019re going to hate the other; and you need to seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these other things will be added to you.\u201d But you have to seek that first. That\u2019s your mission. You cannot serve another master\u2014it\u2019s just not possible. It\u2019s hard to stay on mission. It\u2019s not an easy thing, but I think you have to know what it is.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Donovan, the image I have in my head\u2014of you running toward the fire\u2014is an image of a teeth-gritted, \u201cI\u2019m going for it.\u201d The quiver I hear in your voice, as you tell the story, is a different part of you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Oh, no. The reality is\u2014when you\u2019re standing up and you\u2019re running, you\u2019re like: \u201cOh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! I\u2019m probably going to get shot. Okay, well, just keep running.\u201d I mean, it is not this sort of macho, terminator-istic guy that\u2019s running around. It\u2019s just a scared 24-year-old, who knows he has a responsibility. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe reason that all of my guys\u2014these 18-, 19-, 20-, and 21-year-olds are able to do these amazing things\u2014it isn\u2019t because they are abnormal, just crazy human beings. It\u2019s because they\u2019re normal human beings who are held to a really high standard. Then, they\u2019re told, \u201cYou have a responsibility.\u201d So yes, there is this\u2014when you picture me\u2014really picture a scared 24-year-old, thinking to himself: \u201cI may get shot. Okay, but I\u2019ve got to keep running.\u201d That\u2019s what you should picture.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I think of that imagery, as well, in thinking about what\u2019s taking place in marriages and families today\u2014and how people, instead of running toward enemy fire, are bailing. They\u2019re bailing out on their family. They\u2019re bailing out on their marriage. They\u2019re not protecting. They\u2019re not on mission to protect their sons and daughters against, what you know is around the corner, or even what\u2019s happening today. That mission should direct what\u2019s taking place\u2014in a single man\u2019s life, a single woman, a married couple, or a family.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> It has got to affect every facet of your life\u2014from how you work at your job, to how you lead yourself, to how you treat your husband or how you treat your wife, to how you raise your children. If you don\u2019t know why you\u2019re doing all those things, then chances are you\u2019re going to do a number of them poorly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI really think that that is true. If you don\u2019t know what a commitment means and why God has created the institution\u2014marriage is a sacred institution. He asked us to enter into it with the same commitment that Christ made to the Church by dying for them, giving Himself up for them. If you don\u2019t understand that, it\u2019s really hard to stick through when times get tough. We\u2019ve done three deployments, and I can assure you there have been tough times in our marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I thought about marriage. I thought about the tombstone test. You talk about the tombstone test. That applies in marriage; doesn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> I think it does.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Explain what the tombstone test is for a listener.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> One of the ways to ask yourself: \u201cOkay, what should my mission be? What really matters? What\u2019s really important?\u201d is to ask yourself, \u201cAs I\u2019m being lowered into the ground, what do I want written on my tombstone?\u201d What would be one or two sentences that people want to remember\u2014I want people to remember me for\u2014I want to be known for.\u201d When I\u2019m standing before God, I want to be able to say, \u201cGod, here is what I did for You.\u201d That is, I think, the tombstone test.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve seen a lot of tombstones, and no one talks about someone\u2019s bank account. I\u2019ve never seen, written on a tombstone, \u201cHe made the number four quarters in a row.\u201d What I have seen is, \u201cLoving father, devoted husband\u201d. So, I think it\u2019s worth thinking: \u201cIf that\u2019s what we want written on our tombstone, then how do I make sure that that can be written honestly, with integrity, today? How do I direct my energy, my time, my effort, to make that a reality?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> We, in recent months, have been talking a lot about courage, here on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. You just exemplified that in being on a mission\u2014protecting your men and running toward enemy fire. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have to ask you my favorite question. It\u2019s this, Donovan: \u201cWhat is the most courageous thing you\u2019ve ever done in all your life?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Well, some people might argue that it was asking my wife to marry me because I was clearly\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Out of your league?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Yes, out of my league\u2014punching way above my weight class\u2014no question about that. It took a lot of guts\u2014a lot of guts for that one. But everyone who knows me would say, \u201cYes! That is very true.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s a great question, and I think about that. One of the things the book talks about and that we were taught, in the Marines, that there are two different types of courage. There is physical courage, which risks life and limb; and then, there\u2019s moral courage, which risks careers, lives or livelihoods to speak the truth to power; right? So let me answer along both of those lines.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPhysical courage: The day that we were asked to go\u2014and we didn\u2019t know it at the time\u2014but we were asked to, essentially, go and spend eight to twelve hours fighting, house to house, in Ramadi. I had no idea that was going to happen, but the way it started was\u2014I got shaken one morning\u2014saying: \u201cHey, sir, sir, sir. The third platoon has been hit. They\u2019ve got a couple wounded. They\u2019re scattered throughout the city. You\u2019re the QRF\u2014Quick Reaction Force. Go find them and pull them out.\u201d \u201cOkay, got it.\u201d I had gone to bed at like four that morning because we were patrolling all night. So, we were really tired. We mounted up our vehicles, drove into the city\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Okay, just stop for a second. How big is this city?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> A city of about 400,000 people. It\u2019s more population-dense than Washington, DC or New York City; but you can walk across it in about 45 minutes. So, it\u2019s a ton of people packed into this really dense urban core. The buildings mostly are two- and three- and some five- and ten-story buildings\u2014that are all packed really close together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe drive to the southern end of the city, and all I can hear is gunfire. We have no idea where third platoon is. We see this smoke rising up in the distance. We\u2019re like, \u201cWell, they\u2019re probably in that area.\u201d So, we all get off of our trucks because you can\u2019t drive them through the city\u2014they\u2019re too big. We just start running at that gunfire and that smoke, until we hit really fierce resistance. We, basically, get pinned down by machine guns; and we spend the day fighting, house to house. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt one point in time I had a grenade land about two feet in front of me. I thought: \u201cOh, I\u2019m dead. That\u2019s the end of it.\u201d But it didn\u2019t go off; and then, our guys threw grenades back toward them. The bad guys would throw grenades over one wall; we\u2019d throw our own back over the same wall. That\u2019s what we did all day-long\u2014that\u2019s what we did. Then, we did the same thing the next day. I would say, as it relates to physical courage, that day was probably the one that sticks out in my mind.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs it relates to moral courage\u2014which I think may have been harder\u2014it was when I got a telegram that said, \u201cYou have been involuntarily recalled.\u201d I was at Harvard Business School. It was my second year in business school. I had a great job lined up with PepsiCo\u2014I was really excited to start that. And I got a telegram in the mail that said, basically: \u201cCongratulations, Captain Campbell. You\u2019ve been involuntarily recalled. You need to serve a third tour.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat was so hard there was\u2014I knew exactly what I was getting into. The second tour\u2014I hadn\u2019t fought that hard before. I hadn\u2019t been in that type of combat\u2014I didn\u2019t know what I was getting into. But the third tour, I knew. I remember coming home. I had broken my leg, and I could barely run because I had just gotten my cast off and done all the rehab. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember talking to my wife\u2014we were talking about it. I said: \u201cI know I can get out of this because I can barely run. But when I signed those papers, I gave my word. I didn\u2019t say, \u2018Hey, I\u2019ll go back if it\u2019s convenient for me,\u2019 or, \u2018I\u2019ll go back if you really, really need me and can prove it to me.\u2019 When I signed those papers and said \u2018I\u2019ll serve you for four years\u2014and for four years, thereafter, if you need me back and you call me, I\u2019ll show up.\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, they called; and I didn\u2019t want to do it. I knew what I was getting into. I knew it was going to be hard. I knew I could get out of it, but my wife and I talked about it. She said: \u201cYou gave your word. You have to keep it. It\u2019s just that simple.\u201d So, to do what was right, I went back. I spent another year away from my wife, and missed my oldest daughter\u2019s second year of life, and went to Afghanistan. I only got blown up once there\u2014so it wasn\u2019t that bad of a tour, in all honesty.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I have done this before in a similar interview\u2014not exactly the same\u2014but to the widow of a Seal Team Six member. Thank you! [Emotion in voice] You bring a face to war and the courage that\u2019s demanded of a 24- or 25-year-old.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Do you want to know who showed real courage that day? It was my wife because she knows exactly what it\u2019s like to be the one who sits at home when the news is turned on\u2014and all that she sees is \u201cTen Marines Dead in Ramadi.\u201d She doesn\u2019t know, for a week, if I\u2019m alive or I\u2019m dead. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe knows she\u2019s about to be a single mom for a year; and she\u2019s still telling her husband: \u201cYou gave your word. You have to go and do it. That\u2019s what God would have you do. I will shoulder the load while you\u2019re gone.\u201d That is a brave woman, right there. I have a ton of respect for her. She showed way more courage in doing that than I did because it\u2019s a lot harder to be left behind.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Courage is doing your duty in the face of fear.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> It is overcoming fear. That is exactly right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> As I hear you describe leadership, oftentimes, when we talk about a husband\u2019s responsibility in marriage, we talk about the husband needing to be a leader. People kind of chafe, like: \u201cWell, why does he get to decide what to do? Why does he get to call the shots?\u201d That\u2019s not what\u2019s at the core of leadership. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, what you\u2019ve outlined in your book, <em>The Leader\u2019s Code,<\/em> is that leadership is really about being on mission. It\u2019s about having the right kind of character. It\u2019s about how you serve. It\u2019s about getting the job done. I want to encourage dads, who are listening, husbands who are tuned in\u2014this is a book that really has a lot of application for the kind of men we are at home. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe book is called <em>The Leader\u2019s Code,<\/em> and we have it in our <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>Resource Center. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com for more information on how to get a copy of <em>The Leader\u2019s Code, <\/em>by Donovan Campbell. Again our website is FamilyLifeToday.com; or you can call, toll-free, at 1-800-358-6329. That\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then, the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d. Ask about the book, <em>The Leader\u2019s Code<\/em>, when you get in touch with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, we are getting really close to the end of the month. This Friday is when everything wraps up. As you know, this month, we\u2019ve had listeners who have stepped forward and offered to match the donations we receive from other listeners on a dollar-for-dollar basis. We just have a few more days to be able to take full advantage of this $603,000 matching-gift fund. You can go to our website, FamilyLifeToday.com. There is a thermometer there that will show you how close to that goal we are. But we still have a ways to go; and we\u2019re hoping you will consider, today, going to FamilyLifeToday.com and making a donation so that FamilyLife can have a pre-summer surplus as we head into what are often some challenging months for ministries, like ours.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWould you go to FamilyLifeToday.com and make a donation? When you do, that donation is going to be matched, dollar for dollar\u2014your donation will be doubled. So, let us hear from you. Again, FamilyLifeToday.com; click the button that says, \u201cI CARE\u201d, to make a donation online. Or call -800-FL-TODAY; make your donation over the phone. Let me just say, \u201cThanks,\u201d in advance, for whatever you are able to do. And please pray for us this week\u2014that we\u2019ll take full advantage of this matching-gift opportunity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd be sure to join us back again tomorrow. Donovan Campbell is going to be here again. We\u2019re going to talk more about what makes up godly leadership. Hope you can be here for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2013 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["24M"],"filesize_raw":["25167557"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-302747.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-302747.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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vital on the battlefield, excellence is especially needed on the home front.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2013-05-28.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> As a young Marine, Donovan Campbell says he learned a lot of lessons about leadership. One of the lessons he learned, as a Marine, was the need for character\u2014for integrity. Here\u2019s Donovan Campbell.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> When I was at Harvard Business School, I had a great job lined up with PepsiCo. I was really excited to start that. And I got a telegram in the mail that said, basically: \u201cCongratulations, Captain Campbell. You have been involuntarily recalled. You need to serve a third tour.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember coming home. I had broken my leg, and I could barely run. I remember talking to my wife and saying, \u201cI know I can get out of this because I can barely run, but when I signed those papers I gave my word.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Tuesday, May 28<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine. Donovan Campbell joins us today to talk about lessons he learned on life, manhood, mission, character, and service as a U.S. Marine. Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. Let\u2019s just be honest, right here at the start; okay? There are some guests, some topics, some subjects we\u2019re going to discuss that you\u2019re a little less jazzed about than others.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Bob! Come on! Don\u2019t tell our audience that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We\u2019re going to be talking about\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You\u2019re tipping; you\u2019re tipping\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> If we\u2019re going to be talking about arts and crafts for your toddlers, you\u2019re not going to really engage\u2014[Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And you don\u2019t like the shows when we\u2019ve talked to guests about hunting or fishing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Hunting and fishing\u2014I can pretty much take a nap because I know you\u2019re going to be into that. [Laughter] Today\u2019s program is one of those that you\u2019re kind of fired up about.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, you\u2019re not?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, I am, too; but I can smell the testosterone on you today.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I pound the table about leadership because I think as leadership goes in marriages and families, so goes the nation. We have a new friend, here in the studio\u2014who\u2014I\u2019ve been reading his books now for how long, Donovan?\u2014couple years\u2014three years?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Three years, yes. Three years.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Three years, and I\u2019m really delighted to be able to introduce him to our audience. Donovan Campbell joins us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Welcome.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Thank you for having me, and thank you all for listening. I really appreciate it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I read your book, <em>Joker One<\/em>. I kept raving about it\u2014first, to Barbara; and then, I kept hounding Bob. We swung and missed\u2014weren\u2019t able to get you out of Dallas\/Fort Worth\u2014the passport didn\u2019t work\u2014to get into Arkansas out of Texas\u2014and we finally worked through all the red tape to get you in. You\u2019ve written a new book called <em>The Leader\u2019s Code<\/em>. I\u2019m really excited about this book; but first of all, you\u2019ve been married to your wife since 2002. You\u2019re expecting your first son\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Yes, yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You have three daughters.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Three daughters\u2014so it\u2019s a brave new world I\u2019m entering into.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> No doubt about it. I think what makes Donovan unique is he is a graduate of Princeton. He went to Harvard Business School. He has served in the Marines three combat deployments. He\u2019s really a student, not only of the Bible, but also of leadership and really helping all of us non-military types better understand what\u2019s taking place.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Your new book is called <em>The Leader\u2019s Code<\/em>. Here, you\u2019re taking what you\u2019ve seen in Scripture, what you\u2019ve experienced in Ramadi, and what you\u2019re learning in the business world, and kind of putting it all in one package; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> That\u2019s right. What I so love is having served in the Corps and watching the leadership principles that they apply there; and then, taking a step back and saying: \u201cWait a second! They\u2019re just applying the leadership principles that Christ taught us. They have found the truth\u2014not through a study of the Scriptures\u2014but through a study of what works because the truth is the truth\u2014period. And it works\u2014period.\u201d I love that!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You found out a lot about leadership in the Marine Corps.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> I learned a lot the hard way\u2014let me assure you of that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes. I love the way your book starts. In fact, this book is built around several different characteristics of leadership: character, discipline, excellence, service, getting the job done. But your first chapter\u2014this is why I started pounding the table with Bob\u2014your first chapter begins with the theme of leadership called\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Servant Leadership is the introduction and the first chapter is Mission\u2014it\u2019s all about mission.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s important in the military because\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Because the military is the one institution that we have, in America, charged with two things: saving lives and taking lives. It is the one institution that <em>explicitly<\/em> tells the people who join it: \u201cYour life is no longer about yourself. Your life is about something else. It\u2019s bigger and it\u2019s more important than your own happiness or your own comfort. If you have to sacrifice those two things, that is okay.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt is the one institution that still does that; and if you\u2019re going to ask people to do that, they have to know why. They have to know: \u201cWhat is my mission? If you\u2019re going to send me to a foreign nation and ask me to possibly die, it had better be worth it.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Mission statements are kind of big in business these days. You ought to have a mission statement\u2014you ought to know where you\u2019re headed. I\u2019m curious about you, as a father of three girls and soon to be a father of a son, do you understand your mission as a leader in the Campbell household?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> I try. I try. As you may know, with three daughters sometimes my mission can get obscured by the incessant clamoring of my children.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> [Laughter] You haven\u2019t been through the teenage years yet\u2014you really\u2014yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> That\u2019s right; that\u2019s right. So, I can\u2019t complain. It\u2019s a great point. I truly have no idea what\u2019s in store. Christy and I really try to be intentional about this; and we try to say, \u201cLook, our job, as Christians, is to be and make disciples.\u201d So our children\u2014we have a sacred charge to make our children disciples of Christ\u2014and not just that. We have a sacred charge to make our children women\u2014and now, that I\u2019m having a boy\u2014young men of character. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI will tell you that this last year was the first year my wife and I went through and wrote down the goals for each of our children, and the goals for ourselves for the year, and then what we\u2019re going to do to achieve those goals. We tried to be intentional, but we were not nearly where we needed to be.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You said something in your book about mission that I want to read to our audience, and I want you to comment on it. You said, \u201cWithout an overarching, all-encompassing mission that focuses us away from ourselves, we have no compelling reason to serve anything other than ourselves.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> That\u2019s exactly right. The great irony is that the more we serve ourselves, the less likely we are to find ourselves, and the less likely we are to find happiness, purpose, and meaning.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I want you to share the story of that fire fight in Ramadi in 2004, where you came to that discovery.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> So, the thing about combat is\u2014when you first go into it, you think to yourself: \u201cHmm. I\u2019ll probably make it out of this alive. I\u2019m really good at what I do. We\u2019re all highly-trained Marines. We plan well; we execute well. If I just train hard and work hard, we\u2019re going to make it out.\u201d Then, you go into combat; and you realize that that\u2019s not the case, \u201cWe\u2019re going to get wounded.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, there was a moment when I said: \u201cYou know what? It\u2019s not about me making it back. I am essentially already dead.\u201d Now, I\u2019m not focused on myself anymore. I don\u2019t leave the base, every morning, thinking to myself, \u201cHow am I going to come back?\u201d I leave the base every morning, now because I know it\u2019s not about me anymore. I leave the base, now thinking: \u201cHow can I get the job done? How can I take care of my Marines?\u201d No longer is it, \u201cHow can I keep Donovan Campbell alive?\u201d It\u2019s, \u201cHow can I do what I was put here to do, and how can I take care of others as I do it?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You know, on a conceptual level, what you\u2019re talking about is easy for me to understand and go, \u201cThat\u2019s the right focus.\u201d On a practical level\u2014when all of a sudden you\u2019re in danger, when you\u2019re in combat and bullets are flying\u2014I would think there\u2019d be some self-preservation instinct that would just kick in.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Well, there is a self-preservation instinct that kicks in, but the shift is kind of two-fold. It\u2019s on a philosophical level. I can, literally, remember a time when I said: \u201cYou know what? I\u2019m probably just going to die, and that\u2019s okay because I\u2019m not here to live. I\u2019m here to take care of my Marines. I\u2019m here to accomplish the mission. That\u2019s what you do as a leader. You don\u2019t serve yourself, period. Okay, got it.\u201d So that was the philosophical shift.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, there are the day-in, day-out tactical decisions; right? The first time where I told myself, \u201cI\u2019m really proud to be a lieutenant,\u201d was when we had an RPG attack on an Army convoy that was sitting right outside this anti-American mosque we had been asked to search in the middle of the day. So, my guys had cordoned it off; another platoon was hitting the mosque. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis Army convoy pulls up. It\u2019s stringing along the street. It\u2019s about 50-feet wide. I\u2019m looking at them; and I\u2019m like: \u201cYou guys are going to get attacked. In fact, we\u2019re all going to get attacked. I promise you, we\u2019re all going to get attacked. We\u2019re just sitting here in midday. That\u2019s just what happens when you sit here in midday in Ramadi.\u201d So I went up to them and said: \u201cYou guys should spread out a little bit. They\u2019re going to hit us, blah, blah, blah.\u201d They didn\u2019t. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSure enough, an RPG hit\u2014blew up one of the tracks. People started scattering everywhere\u2014machine gun fire started raining down. Everyone on the street, who was standing\u2014all of a sudden, they vanished. They\u2019re all taking cover, except two guys. It was me and one other guy. I look across the street. This other guy is standing up straight, and he is running as fast as he can to where the fire is coming from; and I\u2019m doing the exact same thing. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are both running, as fast as we can, to where the machine gun fire is coming from because we are both lieutenants. It is our job, while everyone else takes cover, to figure out what is happening so that we can make sure: one, we take effective action; and two, if there\u2019s anyone wounded, we can save them. Our job is to stand up in the middle of fire and run at that fire so that we can take care of others, and we can accomplish the mission. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, you have this philosophical shift\u2014you have this day-in, day-out sort of tactical decisions you have to make, \u201cDo I take cover, or do I run at the machine gun fire?\u201d Sometimes, you do the first. Sometimes, you do the second; but typically, if you\u2019re a leader, you have to do the second.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I\u2019m stunned by the image you\u2019re creating; and yet, as I really listen to what Jesus said, He called us to deny ourselves\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> \u201cTake up your cross and follow Me;\u201d absolutely.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014and to run toward the finish line, and toward enemy fire, and to represent Him\u2014be on a mission. That\u2019s really what you\u2019re calling men and women to do in this book\u2014in their marriages, in their families, at work, in their community.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> That\u2019s exactly right. One of my favorite passages is Matthew 6:19 through 34, where Christ says: \u201cListen. You can\u2019t serve two masters. You\u2019re either going to love one or you\u2019re going to hate the other; and you need to seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these other things will be added to you.\u201d But you have to seek that first. That\u2019s your mission. You cannot serve another master\u2014it\u2019s just not possible. It\u2019s hard to stay on mission. It\u2019s not an easy thing, but I think you have to know what it is.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Donovan, the image I have in my head\u2014of you running toward the fire\u2014is an image of a teeth-gritted, \u201cI\u2019m going for it.\u201d The quiver I hear in your voice, as you tell the story, is a different part of you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Oh, no. The reality is\u2014when you\u2019re standing up and you\u2019re running, you\u2019re like: \u201cOh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh! I\u2019m probably going to get shot. Okay, well, just keep running.\u201d I mean, it is not this sort of macho, terminator-istic guy that\u2019s running around. It\u2019s just a scared 24-year-old, who knows he has a responsibility. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe reason that all of my guys\u2014these 18-, 19-, 20-, and 21-year-olds are able to do these amazing things\u2014it isn\u2019t because they are abnormal, just crazy human beings. It\u2019s because they\u2019re normal human beings who are held to a really high standard. Then, they\u2019re told, \u201cYou have a responsibility.\u201d So yes, there is this\u2014when you picture me\u2014really picture a scared 24-year-old, thinking to himself: \u201cI may get shot. Okay, but I\u2019ve got to keep running.\u201d That\u2019s what you should picture.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I think of that imagery, as well, in thinking about what\u2019s taking place in marriages and families today\u2014and how people, instead of running toward enemy fire, are bailing. They\u2019re bailing out on their family. They\u2019re bailing out on their marriage. They\u2019re not protecting. They\u2019re not on mission to protect their sons and daughters against, what you know is around the corner, or even what\u2019s happening today. That mission should direct what\u2019s taking place\u2014in a single man\u2019s life, a single woman, a married couple, or a family.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> It has got to affect every facet of your life\u2014from how you work at your job, to how you lead yourself, to how you treat your husband or how you treat your wife, to how you raise your children. If you don\u2019t know why you\u2019re doing all those things, then chances are you\u2019re going to do a number of them poorly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI really think that that is true. If you don\u2019t know what a commitment means and why God has created the institution\u2014marriage is a sacred institution. He asked us to enter into it with the same commitment that Christ made to the Church by dying for them, giving Himself up for them. If you don\u2019t understand that, it\u2019s really hard to stick through when times get tough. We\u2019ve done three deployments, and I can assure you there have been tough times in our marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I thought about marriage. I thought about the tombstone test. You talk about the tombstone test. That applies in marriage; doesn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> I think it does.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Explain what the tombstone test is for a listener.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> One of the ways to ask yourself: \u201cOkay, what should my mission be? What really matters? What\u2019s really important?\u201d is to ask yourself, \u201cAs I\u2019m being lowered into the ground, what do I want written on my tombstone?\u201d What would be one or two sentences that people want to remember\u2014I want people to remember me for\u2014I want to be known for.\u201d When I\u2019m standing before God, I want to be able to say, \u201cGod, here is what I did for You.\u201d That is, I think, the tombstone test.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve seen a lot of tombstones, and no one talks about someone\u2019s bank account. I\u2019ve never seen, written on a tombstone, \u201cHe made the number four quarters in a row.\u201d What I have seen is, \u201cLoving father, devoted husband\u201d. So, I think it\u2019s worth thinking: \u201cIf that\u2019s what we want written on our tombstone, then how do I make sure that that can be written honestly, with integrity, today? How do I direct my energy, my time, my effort, to make that a reality?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> We, in recent months, have been talking a lot about courage, here on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. You just exemplified that in being on a mission\u2014protecting your men and running toward enemy fire. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have to ask you my favorite question. It\u2019s this, Donovan: \u201cWhat is the most courageous thing you\u2019ve ever done in all your life?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Well, some people might argue that it was asking my wife to marry me because I was clearly\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Out of your league?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Yes, out of my league\u2014punching way above my weight class\u2014no question about that. It took a lot of guts\u2014a lot of guts for that one. But everyone who knows me would say, \u201cYes! That is very true.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s a great question, and I think about that. One of the things the book talks about and that we were taught, in the Marines, that there are two different types of courage. There is physical courage, which risks life and limb; and then, there\u2019s moral courage, which risks careers, lives or livelihoods to speak the truth to power; right? So let me answer along both of those lines.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPhysical courage: The day that we were asked to go\u2014and we didn\u2019t know it at the time\u2014but we were asked to, essentially, go and spend eight to twelve hours fighting, house to house, in Ramadi. I had no idea that was going to happen, but the way it started was\u2014I got shaken one morning\u2014saying: \u201cHey, sir, sir, sir. The third platoon has been hit. They\u2019ve got a couple wounded. They\u2019re scattered throughout the city. You\u2019re the QRF\u2014Quick Reaction Force. Go find them and pull them out.\u201d \u201cOkay, got it.\u201d I had gone to bed at like four that morning because we were patrolling all night. So, we were really tired. We mounted up our vehicles, drove into the city\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Okay, just stop for a second. How big is this city?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> A city of about 400,000 people. It\u2019s more population-dense than Washington, DC or New York City; but you can walk across it in about 45 minutes. So, it\u2019s a ton of people packed into this really dense urban core. The buildings mostly are two- and three- and some five- and ten-story buildings\u2014that are all packed really close together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe drive to the southern end of the city, and all I can hear is gunfire. We have no idea where third platoon is. We see this smoke rising up in the distance. We\u2019re like, \u201cWell, they\u2019re probably in that area.\u201d So, we all get off of our trucks because you can\u2019t drive them through the city\u2014they\u2019re too big. We just start running at that gunfire and that smoke, until we hit really fierce resistance. We, basically, get pinned down by machine guns; and we spend the day fighting, house to house. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt one point in time I had a grenade land about two feet in front of me. I thought: \u201cOh, I\u2019m dead. That\u2019s the end of it.\u201d But it didn\u2019t go off; and then, our guys threw grenades back toward them. The bad guys would throw grenades over one wall; we\u2019d throw our own back over the same wall. That\u2019s what we did all day-long\u2014that\u2019s what we did. Then, we did the same thing the next day. I would say, as it relates to physical courage, that day was probably the one that sticks out in my mind.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs it relates to moral courage\u2014which I think may have been harder\u2014it was when I got a telegram that said, \u201cYou have been involuntarily recalled.\u201d I was at Harvard Business School. It was my second year in business school. I had a great job lined up with PepsiCo\u2014I was really excited to start that. And I got a telegram in the mail that said, basically: \u201cCongratulations, Captain Campbell. You\u2019ve been involuntarily recalled. You need to serve a third tour.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat was so hard there was\u2014I knew exactly what I was getting into. The second tour\u2014I hadn\u2019t fought that hard before. I hadn\u2019t been in that type of combat\u2014I didn\u2019t know what I was getting into. But the third tour, I knew. I remember coming home. I had broken my leg, and I could barely run because I had just gotten my cast off and done all the rehab. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember talking to my wife\u2014we were talking about it. I said: \u201cI know I can get out of this because I can barely run. But when I signed those papers, I gave my word. I didn\u2019t say, \u2018Hey, I\u2019ll go back if it\u2019s convenient for me,\u2019 or, \u2018I\u2019ll go back if you really, really need me and can prove it to me.\u2019 When I signed those papers and said \u2018I\u2019ll serve you for four years\u2014and for four years, thereafter, if you need me back and you call me, I\u2019ll show up.\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, they called; and I didn\u2019t want to do it. I knew what I was getting into. I knew it was going to be hard. I knew I could get out of it, but my wife and I talked about it. She said: \u201cYou gave your word. You have to keep it. It\u2019s just that simple.\u201d So, to do what was right, I went back. I spent another year away from my wife, and missed my oldest daughter\u2019s second year of life, and went to Afghanistan. I only got blown up once there\u2014so it wasn\u2019t that bad of a tour, in all honesty.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I have done this before in a similar interview\u2014not exactly the same\u2014but to the widow of a Seal Team Six member. Thank you! [Emotion in voice] You bring a face to war and the courage that\u2019s demanded of a 24- or 25-year-old.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> Do you want to know who showed real courage that day? It was my wife because she knows exactly what it\u2019s like to be the one who sits at home when the news is turned on\u2014and all that she sees is \u201cTen Marines Dead in Ramadi.\u201d She doesn\u2019t know, for a week, if I\u2019m alive or I\u2019m dead. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe knows she\u2019s about to be a single mom for a year; and she\u2019s still telling her husband: \u201cYou gave your word. You have to go and do it. That\u2019s what God would have you do. I will shoulder the load while you\u2019re gone.\u201d That is a brave woman, right there. I have a ton of respect for her. She showed way more courage in doing that than I did because it\u2019s a lot harder to be left behind.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Courage is doing your duty in the face of fear.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Donovan:<\/strong> It is overcoming fear. That is exactly right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> As I hear you describe leadership, oftentimes, when we talk about a husband\u2019s responsibility in marriage, we talk about the husband needing to be a leader. People kind of chafe, like: \u201cWell, why does he get to decide what to do? Why does he get to call the shots?\u201d That\u2019s not what\u2019s at the core of leadership. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, what you\u2019ve outlined in your book, <em>The Leader\u2019s Code,<\/em> is that leadership is really about being on mission. It\u2019s about having the right kind of character. It\u2019s about how you serve. It\u2019s about getting the job done. I want to encourage dads, who are listening, husbands who are tuned in\u2014this is a book that really has a lot of application for the kind of men we are at home. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe book is called <em>The Leader\u2019s Code,<\/em> and we have it in our <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>Resource Center. Go to FamilyLifeToday.com for more information on how to get a copy of <em>The Leader\u2019s Code, <\/em>by Donovan Campbell. Again our website is FamilyLifeToday.com; or you can call, toll-free, at 1-800-358-6329. That\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then, the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d. Ask about the book, <em>The Leader\u2019s Code<\/em>, when you get in touch with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, we are getting really close to the end of the month. This Friday is when everything wraps up. As you know, this month, we\u2019ve had listeners who have stepped forward and offered to match the donations we receive from other listeners on a dollar-for-dollar basis. We just have a few more days to be able to take full advantage of this $603,000 matching-gift fund. You can go to our website, FamilyLifeToday.com. There is a thermometer there that will show you how close to that goal we are. But we still have a ways to go; and we\u2019re hoping you will consider, today, going to FamilyLifeToday.com and making a donation so that FamilyLife can have a pre-summer surplus as we head into what are often some challenging months for ministries, like ours.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWould you go to FamilyLifeToday.com and make a donation? When you do, that donation is going to be matched, dollar for dollar\u2014your donation will be doubled. So, let us hear from you. Again, FamilyLifeToday.com; click the button that says, \u201cI CARE\u201d, to make a donation online. Or call -800-FL-TODAY; make your donation over the phone. Let me just say, \u201cThanks,\u201d in advance, for whatever you are able to do. And please pray for us this week\u2014that we\u2019ll take full advantage of this matching-gift opportunity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd be sure to join us back again tomorrow. Donovan Campbell is going to be here again. We\u2019re going to talk more about what makes up godly leadership. Hope you can be here for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. Help for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2013 FamilyLife. 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