{"id":302551,"date":"2012-07-05T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2012-07-05T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/how-did-i-get-to-be-me\/"},"modified":"2012-07-05T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2012-07-05T15:00:00","slug":"how-did-i-get-to-be-me","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/how-did-i-get-to-be-me\/","title":{"rendered":"How Did I Get to Be Me?"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Ed and Lana Bethune talk about their realization that God&#8217;s will was more important than their own.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2012-07-05.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"23.56M","filesize_raw":"24706138","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2822],"tags":[4134],"podcast_series":[7885],"cwp_profile":[9272],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302551","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-growing-in-your-faith","tag-life-change","podcast_series-jackhammered","cwp_profile-ed-and-lana-bethune","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302551\/how-did-i-get-to-be-me","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302551\/how-did-i-get-to-be-me","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"fYVNEzki7B\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/how-did-i-get-to-be-me\/\">How Did I Get to Be Me?<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/how-did-i-get-to-be-me\/embed\/#?secret=fYVNEzki7B\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;How Did I Get to Be Me?&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"fYVNEzki7B\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg",508,508,false]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"kfairris@familylife.com","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/kfairrisfamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"Ed and Lana Bethune talk about their realization that God's will was more important than their own.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2012-07-05.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Lana Bethune grew up going to church.\u00a0 She assumed if you meet a boy at church and you marry a boy from church, then, you\u2019re equally-yoked; right?\u00a0\u00a0 Well, not necessarily.\u00a0 Here\u2019s Lana.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lana:<\/strong>\u00a0 Anytime the doors opened, my mother sent me there.\u00a0 I was very strong, as a youth, in the youth group and that sort of thing.\u00a0 I knew that Ed and his mother had been to Sunday school when he was younger; but I don\u2019t think I knew, at the time, that he had this conflicting thing in his life.\u00a0 I looked at the good part.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Thursday, July 5<sup>th<\/sup>.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 Today, we will meet a former congressman and his wife and hear their story of how God worked in their lives and in their marriage.\u00a0 Stay tuned.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us.\u00a0 I was just sitting here thinking about who we\u2019ve got in the studio\u2014a marine, an FBI agent, a former U.S. congressman.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Right.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 We\u2019ve got a high-profile ethics attorney who has represented some high-profile clients, and it\u2019s all one guy.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It is, and the Mafia was scared to death of him.\u00a0 I\u2019m sure a lot of folks in Washington, D.C., were, too.\u00a0 [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEd and Lana Bethune join us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Lana, Ed, welcome to our broadcast.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 Thank you.\u00a0 Thank you, Dennis.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lana:<\/strong>\u00a0 Thank you, Dennis.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Ed was a congressman for three terms.\u00a0 He and Lana have been married for 53 years, have two children, eight grandchildren\u2014all granddaughters\u2014all granddaughters.\u00a0 So, they\u2019ve got a lot going on in their family.\u00a0 He has written a book called <em>Jackhammered<\/em>.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to take you right to the heart of the story, which is not just the memoirs of your life, but of a sailboat trip that you guys took, where you headed out and you were going to sail across the Atlantic Ocean.\u00a0 What in the world possessed you?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 What were you thinking?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 What were you thinking about that?\u00a0 [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, that is the very question\u2014that when I finished my first story\u2014which was just a short story\u2014it was about our attempt to sail across the Atlantic Ocean.\u00a0 That is all I ever intended to write because people told me that that was an interesting and inspirational story; and so, I should write it up.\u00a0 So, I did.\u00a0 I wrote it up; and I went to Lana one day, after finishing it.\u00a0 I said, \u201cWhat in the world were we doing out there?\u201d\u00a0 [Laughter]\u00a0 So, we laughed about it.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, I got to thinking, \u201cYou know, why did I go into the Marine Corp when I was 18 years old?\u00a0 Why did I go into the FBI\u2014get on the front line, there in the fight against crime, and Mafia, and all that?\u00a0 Why did I run for Congress, as a Republican, when there were no Republicans in the entire Second Congressional District\u2014not a single elected official?\u00a0 Why did I do things like this?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, that, then, led to the question, \u201cHow did I come to be me?\u201d which is a question all of us ask ourselves from time to time, particularly, as you get into your senior years.\u00a0 It is a really important question.\u00a0 In my story, answering that question revealed a lot about my journey, which culminated that day on the high seas when we, after six days at sea\u2014imagine, if you will, the movie <em>The Perfect Storm<\/em>, the kind of seas that you saw in that movie.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe got caught in the Atlantic Ocean 210 miles from the nearest point of land in a storm with waves 25-\/30-feet high; and we were in 31-foot sailboat.\u00a0 We rode it out for 36 hours because that\u2019s what sailors are supposed to do.\u00a0 So, we rode it out, thinking that the storm would subside; then, we could go on with our journey\u2014which our goal was to go to the Mediterranean and sail the routes of the Apostle Paul.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 As I read your book, I noticed that many times, as you talked about your journey and your life, Ed, you pointed to the lady you\u2019d shared most of your life with.\u00a0 You said that Lana was one who was as much interested in the journey and the adventure as you.\u00a0 She really has been a companion, and you got on this boat with him; didn\u2019t you?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lana:<\/strong>\u00a0 I did.\u00a0 I certainly did.\u00a0 I thought it was an extraordinary thing to do, but you must remember that we had sailed a lot before.\u00a0 We had gone into the ocean before.\u00a0 We had not attempted to cross an ocean.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lana:<\/strong>\u00a0 So, this was a first.\u00a0 [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, it is a little different because I\u2019ve sailed a little bit myself; but come on\u2014a 31- foot boat?\u00a0 How old were the two of you when you set off on this journey?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 In our early 50\u2019s.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Was this just a, \u201cLet\u2019s take up the challenge and go from\u201d\u2014did you leave from the East Coast of the United States\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2014headed across the Atlantic?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 We left from Norfolk, Virginia, on June 6, 1990.\u00a0 Our intention was to make a 30- day crossing to Portugal.\u00a0 Then, we would rest and go into the Med\u2014sail the routes of Paul.\u00a0 I know it sounds kind of strange to people to hear that, but that\u2019s the ultimate challenge for a blue-water sailor\u2014is to sail across the Atlantic.\u00a0 We wanted to do it because sailing saved us, really.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen we got to Congress, the pressures of working in the Congress, day in and day out, handling the constituent requests, trying to sort through all the various pressures of the day, you need something to get away from that.\u00a0 Our something was to sail.\u00a0 Sailing is the antithesis of politics.\u00a0 It\u2019s everything that politics is not.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, you mentioned, before we came into the studio, that it\u2019s a pretty heady thing, obviously, to be in Congress and having a lot of people tell you how important you are and how influential you are\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2014or what a rascal you are because you hear both of those things as a congressman.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You get out on the ocean; and all of a sudden, you\u2019re reminded of who you really are.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s what you said about sailing; right?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lana:<\/strong>\u00a0 Exactly.\u00a0 You know the interesting thing that we found in doing this is that\u2014at that time, there were no cell phones.\u00a0 We really didn\u2019t even have GPS.\u00a0 We had a <em>Larand<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, and we had a satellite radio.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut the opportunity to get away, and be just in a small boat, the two of you\u2014with the wind, and the waves, and the silence\u2014you know, it\u2019s amazing how you listen to noises, all the time, when you\u2019re in his position.\u00a0 Of course, many times Ed would be criticized for something he didn\u2019t do.\u00a0 Here I am sitting, thinking, \u201cHe didn\u2019t do that.\u00a0 Why is someone saying that he did?\u201d\u00a0 Most cases, they did not do that; but it is very difficult, I think, to be the spouse of a congressman.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Lana, I have to ask you.\u00a0 I\u2019ve been sailing for an afternoon and had a fine time.\u00a0 Even a couple of days sounds like that could be fun and exciting.\u00a0 Thirty days across the Atlantic\u2014wasn\u2019t there a part of you going, \u201cCan\u2019t we just sign up for an ocean liner to take us?\u00a0 Why do we have to be in charge of the ship?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lana:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, I did think that a little bit, I must say; but we had gone to Maine.\u00a0 We had taken our little 31-foot boat to Maine.\u00a0 We had gone out into the blue water and sailed\u2014contended with freighters, large vessels, and that sort of thing.\u00a0 So, I felt confident that the boat was built for that.\u00a0 There were very few of those boats made, but almost all of them crossed the Atlantic Ocean.\u00a0 So, we had a sea-worthy boat; and I had a great captain.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, I have to ask you about that, Ed.\u00a0 As I was reading your memoirs here, I was thinking, \u201cNow, how do you go to sleep at night when you are in a sailboat?\u00a0 There are two of you.\u00a0 You don\u2019t anchor because there are freighters, there\u2019s traffic in the ocean.\u00a0 You could get run over.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 You keep watches.\u00a0 We learned that early on.\u00a0 We nearly got run over a time or two by a freighter\u2014tanker traffic\u2014when we were just sailing coastal waters around New York City.\u00a0 We learned that early on, and that\u2019s what you do.\u00a0 You take turns watching throughout the night.\u00a0 It\u2019s not an easy thing to do, but it is the ultimate challenge for a sailor.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>As I said, earlier on, I still don\u2019t know why I was driven to take chances throughout my life; but adventure was my escape, really, from the turmoil in my life.\u00a0 It was the way\u2014by living out my dreams\u2014it was the way that I insulated myself from childhood\u2014from the things that were troubling me.\u00a0 I had a very troubled childhood.\u00a0 So\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, one story you told was of sitting on your father\u2019s lap.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I think you were about eight years old at the time, and your dad made a pronouncement to you that was very life-altering for you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 He told me that he was not going to be living with us anymore, and that was the first I knew of that.\u00a0 I just couldn\u2019t believe it, and I remember that moment as if it were just an hour ago.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe were sitting on this chair, and he tried to distract my attention by pointing to some pigeons on the eaves of a neighbor\u2019s house because he was crying.\u00a0 Of course, he didn\u2019t distract my attention.\u00a0 I saw that, and I knew right away that this was different than anything I had heard before.\u00a0 So, I ran into my mother; and she confirmed that they were separating.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe hard part of that for me, Dennis, was that I\u2014in my book, I say that my mother\u2019s family were who I called the hardheads.\u00a0 My father\u2019s family were the soft-hearts.\u00a0 My mother\u2019s family were good people, but they were hill people in Northeast Arkansas that had to scratch a living out of the earth.\u00a0 There was very little love, very little trust.\u00a0 They thought man\u2019s will was the controlling thing that\u2014very self-centered sort of thinking about life.\u00a0 It got into my bloodstream, deep.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, that\u2019s my journey from those earliest days of my life, when I had all those issues that eventually caused me to tailspin, bomb out of high school; but my life really\u2014through the Marine Corp and all of that, I was struggling.\u00a0 I was fighting all of these things that had bothered me as a child.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tUntil I met Lana who, of course, then was the saving grace in my life because she has always been a solid\u2014rock solid\u2014Christian; but she could see, I guess, right away, that she was working with a real hardhead here.\u00a0 It was going to take time.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s a question I wanted to ask, Lana.\u00a0 When you met him in junior college and started dating, did you realize what was in the package at that point?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lana:<\/strong>\u00a0 Not really.\u00a0 He was a very tender-hearted person and very loving; but he was also, \u201cWhere there\u2019s a will, there\u2019s a way.\u201d\u00a0 He was tough.\u00a0 He felt like he could accomplish great things, and that was one of things that actually attracted me.\u00a0 Neither one of us had any money; but I felt, because of his determination, that someday he might be somebody and that he would be a good father, eventually.\u00a0 But he was very loving, really.\u00a0 He tries to make himself sound pretty tough, but\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Were you aware of where he was spiritually at the time?\u00a0 Was that a factor for you\u2014an issue for you?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Lana:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, I had grown up in church in Little Rock.\u00a0 Anytime the doors opened, my mother sent me there.\u00a0 I was very strong, as a youth, in the youth group and that sort of thing.\u00a0 I knew that Ed and his mother had been to Sunday school when he was younger; but I don\u2019t think I knew, at the time, that he had this conflicting thing in his life.\u00a0 I looked at the good part for sure.\u00a0 I think all of it was good, actually.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 She actually didn\u2019t see my manuscript and read about my young life until I was done with the manuscript.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Wow.\u00a0 So, there were parts of your childhood she knew nothing about until you were done with the book?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 She was quite surprised to read a lot of the things that I went through as a child.\u00a0 When I finished the manuscript, I took it into Lana; and I said, \u201cWell, I want you to read it.\u00a0 Then, I want you to tell me, \u2018Should we publish it or should we burn it?\u2019\u201d\u00a0 She read it and said she was surprised by a lot of what was there\u2014and the revelations that I made about my childhood\u2014but she thought it was good and thought it was a good witness.\u00a0 So, we moved forward.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Your dad, after that conversation that you had on his lap as a boy, sporadically showed up in your life.\u00a0 Then, there was a period of time when he pretty much disappeared.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You went to Korea as a Marine, came back on leave, and decided you\u2019d go see your dad in Arizona.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Tell us that story.\u00a0 You said it was one of the greatest moments of your life.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 [Emotion in Ed\u2019s voice]\u00a0\u00a0 Well, it was because it was the first time that I was able to go back and figure out what had happened.\u00a0 I was an adult.\u00a0 So, we had an opportunity to talk, as men.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You went back.\u00a0 You found out where he lived, and you drove from Southern California all the way to Arizona.\u00a0 You found that here was your dad, living in a trailer on a lot that was just scattered with junk, and he wasn\u2019t there.\u00a0 You waited on him.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want you to take us to the moment when you\u2019re standing there, as a young man, looking up at the bus that delivered your dad; and you knew it was him because he had a limp in the way he walked.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, my dad had a rough childhood himself.\u00a0 When he was nine months old, he had polio.\u00a0 He never walked a step in his life without a crutch, or cane, or an artificial leg.\u00a0 To make matters worse, when he was in his 20\u2019s, he was trying to fix an automobile; the fan belt broke and knocked his eye out.\u00a0 So, he had one eye and only one and a half good legs.\u00a0 He had a lot of troubles when he was growing up\u2014and when he was a young man.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAll my life, I loved him; and I\u2019ve always had a soft, soft spot in my heart for disabled people.\u00a0 Anyway, that was the first time I\u2019d seen him in a long time.\u00a0 All of a sudden, he got off the bus and was walking across this lot, littered with junk to his little trailer.\u00a0 I saw him coming and ran to him.\u00a0 His hair was white.\u00a0 There I was, now, an adult; and it was quite a moment.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You said you hugged him\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2014much like a little boy would run to his daddy.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, that was what was happening.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 Then, you had one of the most important conversations you said of your life because it helped you determine what had happened\u2014who you were\u2014kind of helped you piece some things together.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 It did.\u00a0 I, for the first time, realized that I had been raised to believe that man\u2019s will is the most important thing and that man should be in the center of man\u2019s life.\u00a0 I just didn\u2019t get it, at that time.\u00a0 My father, on the other hand, was such a good man, and such a soft-hearted man, and came from a Christian family.\u00a0 It made me realize that the problem I was having was struggling with whether it was my will that mattered or God\u2019s will that mattered.\u00a0 That came in to me loud and clear.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me add, just as quickly, because my head was so steeped in that belief\u2014that it took years of patient teaching and counsel by my wife Lana to get me into the right place.\u00a0 That was a very long and torturous journey for me because I didn\u2019t want to give up my will because, when you do, it\u2019s different.\u00a0 Everything changes, and I just didn\u2019t want to go there.\u00a0 I realized today that, that\u2019s not the way; but I didn\u2019t realize it then.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, I spent several years trying to intellectualize the business of faith.\u00a0 It was really just an excuse, on my part, to delay the business of surrender\u2014of letting go of that powerful will.\u00a0 That\u2019s what it was, and it was going to take some intervening force to get me across the goal line.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, as we\u2019ll hear a little bit later on, it was a powerful force.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Ed:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I mean a showstopper.\u00a0 You don\u2019t know this about me, but you could be describing my life as well\u2014not going to Congress, obviously, and nearly the power or the influence\u2014but as a young man, I battled the issue of my will, as well.\u00a0 It was really the summer that I went to the University of Arkansas as a junior\u2014I transferred from a junior college\u2014that I finally came to the end of myself and said, \u201cIf Jesus Christ be who He said He was, then, really nothing else matters.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI came to a very similar conclusion\u2014that man, being at the center of the picture, really doesn\u2019t make a good picture.\u00a0 It distorts life.\u00a0 It will never work as God designed it.\u00a0 I remember, as a young man, really having a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach going, \u201cIf I do this thing, this is going to cost me.\u201d\u00a0 It did, by the way.\u00a0 It did cost me, but what I didn\u2019t realize is\u2014are the benefits so far outweigh the costs that it\u2019s like it didn\u2019t cost me anything.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI mean, really, to think of what Christ did for me, His love for me, and to live my life in rebellion against him\u2014to try to say, \u201cNot Your will God, but my will.\u00a0 I\u2019m what matters, not You.\u201d\u00a0 When I surrendered to Jesus Christ, that\u2019s when I would say my life began.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, it\u2019s a turning point in anybody\u2019s life\u2014is when we look and we say, \u201cYou know what?\u00a0 Living life for self\u2014I\u2019ve made a mess of things.\u201d\u00a0 For things to change, I need, not only for my sin to be forgiven, but I also need the power to be transformed.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>We\u2019ve got on our website a link that says, \u201cTwo Ways to Live\u201d.\u00a0 I just encourage our listeners\u2014go to FamilyLifeToday.com, and click on that link, and ask yourself this question, \u201cWhich way am I living, and where is it taking me?\u201d\u00a0 There is no more important question to settle than that question.\u00a0 Go to FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 Click the link that says, \u201cTwo Ways to Live\u201d\u2014where there\u2019s a book we\u2019d be happy to send you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s a book called <em>Pursuing God: A Seeker\u2019s Guide<\/em>.\u00a0 If you\u2019d like to understand what it means to have a relationship with God through Jesus Christ, call 1-800-FL-TODAY.\u00a0 Ask for a copy of the book, <em>Pursuing God.<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em>We\u2019ll send it out to you, at no cost.\u00a0 We want you to have a copy of this book, and to read through it, and to consider what it means to be a Christian\u2014a follower of Christ.\u00a0 Call 1-800-FL-TODAY.\u00a0 Ask for a copy of the book, <em>Pursuing God<\/em>; or go to FamilyLifeToday.com and click the link that says, \u201cTwo Ways to Live\u201d, and ask the question, \u201cWhich way am I living?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhile you\u2019re on our website, there is more information there about Ed Bethune\u2019s book called <em>Jackhammered<\/em>.\u00a0 It\u2019s the story of a man who was a Marine, an FBI agent, a member of the House of Representatives, and then, a high-profile ethics lawyer, defending House Speaker Newt Gingrich and Majority Leader Tom Delay against ethics charges.\u00a0 It\u2019s a fascinating book, and we have copies at FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 Go online to order a copy; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and ask about the book, <em>Jackhammered<\/em>, by Ed Bethune.\u00a0 The number, again, is 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then, the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, from time to time, we will hear from folks who say, \u201cI hear you guys mention the fact that you need donations.\u00a0 I hear that regularly on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Why do you need so many donations?\u201d\u00a0 The answer to that is because the cost of producing and syndicating this radio program is significant.\u00a0 That cost is covered by folks, like you, who call in or who go online and make a contribution to help support the ministry.\u00a0 Only a small percentage of our listeners ever do that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, we want to say, \u201cThanks,\u201d to those of you who have done that\u2014those of you who have made a donation from time to time or those of you who support us on a monthly basis.\u00a0 You make this program possible, and we appreciate your support of the ministry.\u00a0 If you\u2019d like to help support <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, it\u2019s easy to do.\u00a0 Go to FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 Click the button that says, \u201cI CARE\u201d, there on our home page.\u00a0 Make an online donation, or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and make a donation over the phone.\u00a0 We appreciate your support of the ministry, and we\u2019re always happy to hear from you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you can join us back tomorrow when Ed and Lana Bethune are going to be here again.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to hear about the storm they were in.\u00a0 It\u2019s a remarkable story about how they thought it was over\u2014that this is where life would end for them.\u00a0 We\u2019ll hear about that tomorrow.\u00a0 Hope you can join us.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2012 FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 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