{"id":302518,"date":"2012-05-07T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2012-05-07T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/finding-refreshment-as-a-mom\/"},"modified":"2012-05-07T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2012-05-07T15:00:00","slug":"finding-refreshment-as-a-mom","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/finding-refreshment-as-a-mom\/","title":{"rendered":"Finding Refreshment as a Mom"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>How does knowing Jesus help you with daily living?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2012-05-07.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"21.36M","filesize_raw":"22399620","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2838,2881],"tags":[5209],"podcast_series":[7873],"cwp_profile":[3125],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302518","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-mothers","category-young-children","tag-taking-time-for-yourself","podcast_series-real-moms-real-jesus","cwp_profile-jill-savage","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302518\/finding-refreshment-as-a-mom","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302518\/finding-refreshment-as-a-mom","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"UvrHylbuTk\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/finding-refreshment-as-a-mom\/\">Finding Refreshment as a Mom<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/finding-refreshment-as-a-mom\/embed\/#?secret=UvrHylbuTk\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Finding Refreshment as a Mom&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"UvrHylbuTk\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var 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living?","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2012-05-07.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 As a mom, are you getting enough time for you?\u00a0 Is that even a fair question to be asking?\u00a0 Jill Savage says if you really care about your kids and about your husband, it\u2019s an important question to ask.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Taking care of ourselves is essential for us to be the moms that we need to be.\u00a0 Part of refueling ourselves is being in God\u2019s Word\u2014part of it is resting\u2014nutrition, exercise\u2014those are <em>not <\/em>selfish things.\u00a0 Moms struggle with it because they feel like they\u2019re being selfish when they\u2019re asking for it or trying to take the time for it.\u00a0 What we need to understand is it is part of our job description as a mom.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday, May 7<sup>th<\/sup>.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Getting enough time to care for your own soul is an important part of how a mom cares for her family.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to talk more about that today.\u00a0 Stay tuned.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us.\u00a0 As guys, the priorities in our lives that tend to squeeze out our time spent cultivating a healthy spiritual life are probably different than the priorities in our wives\u2019 lives that tend to do the same thing.\u00a0\u00a0 In this culture, we\u2019re all so busy that, I think, for many people, that spiritual development gets put on the back burner.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I can tell you, for Barbara, during the years we were having children and raising those children\u2014for a mom, it\u2019s a battle.\u00a0 It\u2019s a battle trying to find the time to cultivate the soul.\u00a0 She could have used Jill Savage\u2019s book, <em>Real Moms...Real Jesus.<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJill joins us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Jill, thanks for writing the book and thanks for helping moms know how to have a contagious relationship with Christ in the midst of some of the most challenging days they face\u2014raising children.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, it is.\u00a0 It isn\u2019t easy, but I think it is important for moms to know that Jesus actually understands them.\u00a0 That was really what my journey was about.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 And you understand what moms are talking about because you are the CEO and founder of <em>Hearts at Home<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup>.\u00a0 You\u2019ve written half a dozen books.\u00a0 You\u2019re a speaker and a mom of five children, yourself.\u00a0 You and your husband Mark live in Illinois.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Tell listeners about <em>Hearts at Home<\/em> because they may not know what that ministry is and what you\u2019re doing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, <em>Hearts at Home <\/em>is an organization that encourages, educates, and equips moms.\u00a0 We do that through our website.\u00a0 We do that through printed resources\u2014the books that we offer; and then, we also do that through our mom conferences.\u00a0 We have conferences currently in Illinois, Minnesota, and Colorado.\u00a0 Those are regional events.\u00a0 We have women who come, literally, from all over the U.S. to those events.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur largest one is in Illinois.\u00a0 It usually hosts about 4,600 moms every spring.\u00a0 The <em>Hearts at Home <\/em>conferences are a mix of a pep rally for moms and mom-school.\u00a0 (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 So you really do equip them.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Oh, we do!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You try to give them practical skills around issues of stress, fatigue, parenting skills\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Parenting, yes\u2014marriage, homemaking.\u00a0 You know, it\u2019s practical, spiritual.\u00a0 We just kind of run the whole gamut of the areas of life that women are struggling with.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 We\u2019ve got a link on our website at FamilyLifeToday.com if folks want to find out more about <em>Hearts at Home <\/em>and when your next conference is going to be and would like to attend\u2014they can do that.\u00a0 Just go to FamilyLifeToday.com for more information.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Jill, you said there was a time, though, in your life where Jesus became real\u2014I mean, really real.\u00a0 You began to think of Him not just as God in human flesh, but someone Who experienced things like you were.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 When I wrote the book, <em>Real Moms, Real Jesus, <\/em>it came out of my personal journey because I had had a season in my life where I just felt like God was really far away.\u00a0 I love to read biographies\u2014I\u2019m a big biography person.\u00a0 Just give me a biography of anybody and I will just inhale it!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember one day, lamenting to God, \u201cOh, I wish I could read a biography of Jesus.\u201d\u00a0 Then I thought about the foolishness of that and thought, \u201cYes, Matthew, Mark, Luke and John\u2014the first four books of the New Testament\u2014are biographies of Jesus!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, I\u2019d never read them that way, though.\u00a0 I\u2019d never thought of them as a <em>biography<\/em>.\u00a0 I began to read them.\u00a0 I actually chose to read them in <em>The Message Bible<\/em> so that I could just kind of read them\u2014more like a book.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs I was reading them, all of a sudden, I began to see Jesus\u2019 life in a different way.\u00a0 You see, up until this point, I saw Jesus as God on earth\u2014and that\u2019s Who He was.\u00a0 The Bible tells us He was fully God, but He was fully man.\u00a0 I had always seen the fully-God part.\u00a0 He performed miracles\u2014He was God on earth.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNever had I seen that He was fully man.\u00a0 I had never seen this human side of Him.\u00a0 I was reading along, and all of a sudden, I ran across\u2014the very first place that I read something was\u2014this simple little description of Jesus\u2019 life.\u00a0 It said this, \u201cLarge crowds followed Him everywhere He went.\u201d\u00a0 I thought, \u201cThat\u2019s like my life as a mother!\u201d\u00a0 (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 With five kids around the house\u2014\u201cLarge crowds followed you everywhere.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 They follow me everywhere I go!\u00a0 I go to the bathroom, and there are fingers underneath the door; you know?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, they may not be hanging on His legs like they are on yours; but\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, but then I read on further; and multiple times it says, \u201cThe crowd pressed into Him.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 I thought, \u201cOh, my gosh!\u00a0 That\u2019s my life!\u00a0 My children are attached to me!\u201d\u00a0 In one season, we had a very colicky baby.\u00a0 The only time she <em>wasn\u2019t<\/em> crying was when she was nursing.\u00a0 I would nurse her, and I had two preschoolers.\u00a0 I felt like one was attached to one leg and one was attached to the other.\u00a0 I would get everybody finally in bed at night.\u00a0 I would fall in bed next to a husband, who had a gleam in his eye.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI wanted to say, \u201cWait a minute!\u00a0 One more person touches me and I am going to lose it!\u201d (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I understand.\u00a0 I\u2019ve seen the look in Barbara\u2019s eyes, when I would come home.\u00a0 Before\u2014\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Don\u2019t even think about it!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s exactly right!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Get that gleam out of your eye!\u00a0 (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Never had I thought about the fact that Jesus would understand what it felt like to have no personal space, but He did.\u00a0 He understands what that feels like to have no personal space because, when He lived on this earth, the crowds pressed <em>into <\/em>Him.\u00a0 I had never thought about that!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere was another story I was reading later on.\u00a0 It was a time when it said that Jesus was exhausted.\u00a0 He\u2019d been teaching on a mountainside all day.\u00a0 He was absolutely exhausted.\u00a0 He asked the disciples to go get a boat.\u00a0 He was going to get away from the crowds with a boat.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI thought, \u201cOh, for moms, we find a bathroom.\u201d\u00a0 Jesus found a boat; moms find a bathroom.\u00a0 I like to say, \u201cTo eat M&amp;Ms<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, without sharing them with anybody else!\u201d\u00a0 (Laughter)\u00a0 Anyway, He gets in this boat.\u00a0 It says He fell right to sleep\u2014fast asleep!\u00a0 I thought, \u201cThat\u2019s my life!\u00a0 My head hits the pillow; I am out!\u201d\u00a0 But here\u2019s the best part\u2014in the middle of the night, a storm blew in.\u00a0 Do you know what the disciples did?\u00a0 They woke Him up!\u00a0 I thought, \u201cThat\u2019s my life!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Never had I thought about the fact that Jesus would understand interrupted sleep.\u00a0 It had never crossed my mind.\u00a0 As I began to read about Jesus\u2019 human experiences and I began to see that He understands my experiences as a mom, all of a sudden, He moved from being very distant and a very disconnected God to being a friend, Who understands.\u00a0 That was a powerful change in my perspective and a change in my relationship with Him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 For a mom to be able to have those thoughts and come to that conclusion, she needs at least a few moments of silence, or of solitude, to be able to connect in the Bible with the reality of Who Jesus Christ really is and worship Him, as you\u2019re talking about worshipping Him at this point, and casting your cares on Him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen did you find the time in your schedule, during those busy years when you were taking care of five\u2014who were, I guess, under the age of 13\u2014so you had teenagers pulling at you\u2014toddlers.\u00a0 How did you find the time to connect with God?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Creatively!\u00a0 I think moms have to be creative.\u00a0 You know, in this journey of seeing Jesus through different eyes, the other thing I did\u2014I looked at, \u201cHow did He live His life, and what can I learn from that?\u201d\u00a0 The Bible often tells us Jesus withdrew from the crowds.\u00a0 As a mom, I had to learn how to withdraw from the crowds.\u00a0 You know, there were some very practical things I began to do that made such a difference.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of them was that I put a Bible in every bathroom.\u00a0\u00a0 I put a Bible\u2014just a little Bible that I picked up at the Christian bookstore\u2014in every bathroom.\u00a0 If I had just two minutes to myself\u2014yes, there might have been little fingers under the door, \u201cMommy, are you in there!?\u201d\u2014just two minutes\u2014you know what I would quickly do?\u00a0 I would turn to the book of Proverbs.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt that point, you can\u2019t even think straight.\u00a0 I would open the book of Proverbs and say, \u201cOkay, what day of the month is this?\u00a0 Okay, let\u2019s see, it\u2019s the 14th; it\u2019s the 14th.\u201d\u00a0 I would go to Proverbs 14 and read Proverbs 14.\u00a0 That would just be enough to sustain me to exit that bathroom (Laughter) and handle whatever the next hour or two hours was going to send my way before I could have another bathroom break.\u00a0 I could get a little more sustenance.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI had to be creative about that.\u00a0 Another strategy I used was asking my husband for help.\u00a0 I remember, one day, he came home from work.\u00a0 This was when our fourth had come along and was a baby.\u00a0 I was just exhausted.\u00a0 I said to him, one day, when he came home, \u201cI want to cut a deal with you.\u201d\u00a0 He\u2019s like, \u201cWhat!?\u201d\u00a0 I said, \u201cWhen you get home, I want 30 minutes.\u00a0 When you get home\u2014that I can go in the bedroom and close the door.\u201d\u00a0 I said, \u201cI want to take the newspaper in there.\u00a0 I want to know what\u2019s going on in the world.\u00a0 I want to take my Bible in there.\u00a0 I just need 30 minutes.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat became Daddy-wrestle time.\u00a0 He would wrestle with the kids.\u00a0 I would try to have dinner in the oven, or in the crock-pot or, quite frankly, just make sure we had enough cereal and milk so we could have dinner that night.\u00a0 (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI would go in the bedroom and close the door.\u00a0 I had to learn to ask for that, sometimes, to make that happen in my life.\u00a0 I think a lot of times, as moms, we think our husbands should just know what I need; or we try to ask with an attitude\u2014like stomping around and slamming kitchen doors are really going to be an effective form of communication.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Not at all!\u00a0 We need to ask with words for what we need.\u00a0 There were nights\u2014I remember in one season of life\u2014I asked my husband if I could have one night off a week.\u00a0 He was willing to do that.\u00a0 I would take my Bible, I would maybe take a book I was reading\u2014I would go to the library and just have some quiet time\u2014just some time to step away from \u201cthe crowds\u201d and refuel.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe need that refueling as moms!\u00a0 We need to connect with the God Who loves us so that we have His strength to carry us through when our strength absolutely gives out.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 There\u2019s an image you have, in the book, of a story about Susannah Wesley, who had 19 children.\u00a0 She had a unique way of getting away from the multitudes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 She did!\u00a0 (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Nineteen would be a multitude; wouldn\u2019t you say?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes it would!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYes, she would pull her big hoop skirt up over her head.\u00a0 When her hoop skirt was up over her head, her children knew that they could not bother her.\u00a0 \u201cMommy was praying!\u00a0 Mommy was talking to Jesus!\u00a0 (Laughter)\u00a0 When Mommy is talking to Jesus, it\u2019s much better if we leave her alone!\u201d\u00a0 (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s a great picture!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It is!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, I remember when Mary Ann was in the midst of this whole child-raising maelstrom.\u00a0 There were nights she would get together with some of her friends\u2014just get out and go over and have the night off\u2014not with a Bible and a book\u2014but just laugh and relax.\u00a0 When she came home\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 She was a different person; wasn\u2019t she?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 She was a <em>completely<\/em> different person.\u00a0 I began to think, \u201cYes, go do that!\u201d\u00a0 The person that came back was a happier, nicer point.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 To that point, Bob, how often did you take the initiative to set up Mary Ann to be able to go do that?\u00a0 We, as husbands, don\u2019t\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Let\u2019s not get into my failings as a husband on the program.\u00a0 (Laughter)\u00a0 That\u2019s not the point!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I look back on it and I cringe to think how much I took for granted\u2014the weight Barbara was carrying.\u00a0 I had my own load at work.\u00a0 I\u2019m coming home and\u2014she always used to call me the \u201cfun Daddy\u201d \u2013 the fun Daddy gets to walk in and do all of the wrestling and all of that.\u00a0 She\u2019s been at home all day, and she\u2019s not the fun Momma because she\u2019s been the enforcer.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 She\u2019s the \u201cmean Mommy\u201d.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 She\u2019s the enforcer!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cMean Mommy!\u00a0 Mommy\u2019s mean.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, you know what?\u00a0 I think this is so important for us to understand.\u00a0 I\u2019m reminded of this every time I get on an airplane.\u00a0 They say, \u201cIf the pressure changes in the cabin, an oxygen mask is going to drop from overhead.\u00a0 You need to put on that oxygen mask.\u201d\u00a0 Then, they say, \u201cIf you\u2019re traveling with a small child, put on your <em>own<\/em> oxygen mask first before you assist your child.\u201d\u00a0 One time, I was traveling on Southwest Airlines.\u00a0 They said, \u201cIf you\u2019re traveling with two children, I\u2019m sorry, you\u2019ll just have to choose your favorite.\u201d\u00a0 (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s a bad joke!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Anyway, that reminds me every time because that is a principle moms need to understand\u2014taking care of ourselves is not selfish.\u00a0 Taking care of ourselves is essential for us to be the moms that we need to be.\u00a0 Part of taking care of ourselves is finding the things that refuel us emotionally.\u00a0 Part of taking care of ourselves is talking with Jesus because, \u201cWhen Mommy talks to Jesus, it\u2019s much better for everybody.\u201d Part of refueling ourselves is being in God\u2019s Word.\u00a0 Part of it is resting, nutrition, exercise.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThose are <em>not selfish things<\/em>.\u00a0 Moms struggle with this!\u00a0 This is huge.\u00a0 Moms struggle with it because they feel like they\u2019re being selfish when they\u2019re asking for it or trying to take the time for it.\u00a0 What we need to understand is it is part of our job description as a mom.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, part of the reason moms feel selfish is because their kids, who, when they\u2019re little, especially, are demand-machines.\u00a0 They know how to come to mom and make you feel selfish.\u00a0 \u201cMommy, I need this.\u00a0 I need this.\u00a0 I need this!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, for a mom to respond as if the child is setting the agenda is to have the whole thing inverted, in the first place.\u00a0 You don\u2019t want a four-year-old setting the agenda for your home.\u00a0 You have to decide, \u201cNo.\u00a0 You don\u2019t need that.\u00a0 What you need is some quiet time while Mommy gets her quiet time.\u201d\u00a0 It really demands that Mom understand that she sets the tone and the priorities for the home.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\u00a0 You know, when my kids stopped taking naps, we stayed with rest time.\u00a0 We could have easily just let that go, but they needed to step away from the craziness . . .\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And!?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2014and I needed it!\u00a0 (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Sure!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 I needed that break!\u00a0 That was very important.\u00a0 You\u2019re right!\u00a0 I could have let their lack of naps dictate what we did; but I needed to be the leader there and to know what was best for them and, ultimately, what was best for our family.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYes, we absolutely need\u2014and here\u2019s the other piece of this\u2014we need to be proactive, not reactive.\u00a0 I think, oftentimes, what happens as moms is we give, and we give, and we give, and we give, and then we end up with this empty tank.\u00a0 We\u2019re a mess!\u00a0 That\u2019s when we end up in a puddle on the floor in tears.\u00a0 Honestly, somebody\u2019s got to rescue us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 I remember, one day that that happened.\u00a0 My husband led me to go to sleep because I was so sleep-deprived.\u00a0 He said, \u201cYou have <em>got <\/em>to get some rest.\u201d\u00a0 That\u2019s not healthy.\u00a0 I need to look at the things that will take care of myself and put them in my life, on a regular basis, instead of getting to the end of myself and just being so plumb tuckered out that now I\u2019ve turned into the \u201cMommy Monster\u201d, which is not healthy for our family\u2014I\u2019m an emotional mess.\u00a0 I need to put those things in place, early on and regularly, and be proactive, instead of being reactive, on the other side.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 What place do friendships have in replenishing a mom\u2019s soul?\u00a0 It seems, to me, one of the ways that Barbara would get bush-wacked or plumb tuckered out, as you called it, was that she would get isolated.\u00a0 She was just surrounded by the multitudes, as you\u2019ve said, at home and didn\u2019t have another adult female voice, speaking into her life.\u00a0 Speak to that need for a woman.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 I think friendships are so important.\u00a0 I think every mom needs a mothering community around her.\u00a0 That mothering community, number one, it helps her know she\u2019s normal.\u00a0 I mean, we really need that because you start getting so focused on your kids; and then you go, \u201cOh, I\u2019m the only one who feels this way,\u201d or, \u201cI\u2019m the only one who deals with this with her kids.\u201d\u00a0 It helps you to know that you\u2019re normal and that your kids are normal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe other thing it does is\u2014when you\u2019re in a mothering community\u2014when you have relationships with other women around you, you also learn to mother in community.\u00a0 For instance, I had a friend, in the early years; and we would trade days off.\u00a0 We were both stay-at-home moms in that season of time.\u00a0 We would trade off\u2014every Tuesday was either my day off or her day off.\u00a0 She would watch my kids, and I would have the whole day to myself.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere were days I went back home and went to bed!\u00a0 Other days I got something accomplished.\u00a0 Other days, I went to lunch with my husband.\u00a0 I needed that!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI could only have that because I had another woman who understood what my challenges were\u2014what my life was like.\u00a0 We were able to encourage each other and actually help each other meet our needs.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 In the end, a wife and a mom needs a husband who is tuned in enough to the needs of her soul to ask the question.\u00a0 So, guys, if you\u2019re listening right now and you\u2019ve got a wife who\u2019s a young mom, or maybe the mother of a flock of teenagers, this question would be a great question to send her in an email or to ask her tonight, after the kids are in bed, \u201cSweetheart, what are the needs of your soul?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Powerful question!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Then, maybe wait for an answer.\u00a0 She may give you one answer tonight.\u00a0 She may give you a better answer in two days.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 But step back and help her know what the needs of her soul are so you can then guide her into the time, the friendships, the schedule, the boundaries in her life.\u00a0 Maybe, you\u2019re going to have to help her throw something overboard\u2014something she\u2019s committed to that\u2019s draining her.\u00a0 In essence, help her simplify her life so the needs of her soul can be addressed by the Spirit of God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs a husband and as the father of your children, you really owe it to your family to take authority, and take responsibility for your wife\u2019s spiritual condition, and find out how she\u2019s doing, and what you may be able to help her do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Maybe this will help a husband think about it.\u00a0 Let\u2019s say somebody came along to you and said, \u201cOkay, I\u2019ve got a job for you.\u00a0 It is seven days a week.\u00a0 You work all seven days.\u00a0 You start at dawn and you get off at\u2014\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 About nine.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0 You don\u2019t!\u00a0 (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cWell, you get off at about 10:00; but you\u2019re on call\u2014\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jill:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 \u2014all night.\u00a0 There you go.\u00a0 Okay, there you go.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201c\u2014all night long.\u00a0 No vacations; no holidays; no sick leave.\u00a0 There\u2019s none of that.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 But it\u2019s the greatest job on earth.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cOh, it\u2019s a wonderful job!\u00a0 But there\u2019s no time for you in the midst of it.\u00a0 Are you interested?\u201d\u00a0 Guys would say, \u201cYou\u2019ve got to be out of your mind!\u201d\u00a0 Right?\u00a0 That\u2019s the job that your wife has\u2014if she\u2019s a mom.\u00a0 That\u2019s really where Jill\u2019s heart is\u2014to help encourage other moms that this is a great job, and that there\u2019s joy in the job, and that Jesus meets you in the job.\u00a0 You learn so much about life, and about Him, and about yourself.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJill, you\u2019ve talked about that in the book you\u2019ve written, <em>Real Moms...Real Jesus:<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em><em>Meet the Friend Who Understands.<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em>It\u2019s a book that we\u2019ve got in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center.\u00a0 You can find out more about the book when you go online at FamilyLifeToday.com.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, it\u2019s FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 Jill\u2019s also written a book called <em>Living with Less So Your Family Has More<\/em>, about redefining your priorities and putting your family first.\u00a0 We have that book in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center, as well.\u00a0 Again, go to FamilyLifeToday.com for more information about both of these books; or call us, toll-free, at 1-800-358-6329.\u00a0 That\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d.\u00a0 Ask about Jill Savage\u2019s book, <em>Real Moms...Real Jesus, <\/em>when you give us a call.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, I need to let our listeners know about something kind of exciting that has happened in the past week.\u00a0 I mentioned last week the matching-gift fund that had been established here, for FamilyLife, to help us as we head into the summer and as we work on some exciting new projects like the <em>Stepping Up <\/em>video series and the <em>Stepping Up <\/em>event for men, that is coming later this summer.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat has happened, in the last week, is that the matching-gift fund has accelerated a little bit.\u00a0 I told you, last week, that every dollar that is donated to FamilyLife between now and the end of May is going to be matched dollar-for-dollar, up to a total of $435,000.\u00a0 What\u2019s happened is we\u2019ve had some other friends of the ministry come along and say, \u201cWait!\u00a0 We want to <em>really <\/em>encourage <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners to make this a priority.\u201d\u00a0 That matching-gift fund is now up to $650,000.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, we\u2019re excited about that; but we\u2019re also hoping and praying that, here, during the month of May, <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners will call or go online to make a donation so we can take full advantage of every bit of that matching-gift opportunity.\u00a0\u00a0 All you have to do is go to FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 Click the button that says, \u201cI Care\u201d.\u00a0 Make an online donation.\u00a0 When you do, your donation is going to be matched dollar-for-dollar with money from that matching-gift fund; or you can call us, toll-free, at 1-800-358-6329\u2014\u00a0\u00a0 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY\u201d.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, when you make a donation, that donation is going to be matched dollar-for-dollar, up to a total of $650,000.\u00a0 We do hope to hear from you!\u00a0 We appreciate very much, in advance, whatever you\u2019re able to do, here during the month of May, to help support us in this matching-gift opportunity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you can be back with us, again, tomorrow.\u00a0 Jill Savage is going to be here again.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to talk tomorrow about some of the challenges that Jill and Mark have experienced in their marriage relationship.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to have a very candid conversation about that tomorrow.\u00a0 Hope you can be with us for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2012 FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 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