{"id":302447,"date":"2012-01-20T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2012-01-20T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/having-a-marriage-without-regrets-part-2\/"},"modified":"2012-01-20T12:00:00","modified_gmt":"2012-01-20T17:00:00","slug":"having-a-marriage-without-regrets-part-2","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/having-a-marriage-without-regrets-part-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Having a Marriage Without Regrets, Part 2"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Do you want to develop greater love and intimacy in your marriage?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2012-01-20.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"28.61M","filesize_raw":"30003620","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2088],"tags":[4213],"podcast_series":[7853],"cwp_profile":[3091],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302447","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-romance-and-sex","tag-love","podcast_series-having-a-marriage-without-regrets","cwp_profile-kay-arthur","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302447\/having-a-marriage-without-regrets-part-2","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302447\/having-a-marriage-without-regrets-part-2","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"5OqNLDqn5t\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/having-a-marriage-without-regrets-part-2\/\">Having a Marriage Without Regrets, Part 2<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/having-a-marriage-without-regrets-part-2\/embed\/#?secret=5OqNLDqn5t\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Having a Marriage Without Regrets, Part 2&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"5OqNLDqn5t\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg",508,508,false]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"kfairris@familylife.com","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/kfairrisfamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"Do you want to develop greater love and intimacy in your marriage?","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2012-01-20.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 The Bible makes it pretty clear, \u201cGod is very serious about faithfulness in marriage.\u201d\u00a0 Here's Kay Arthur.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Marriage is a commitment.\u00a0 In the Book of Malachi, God is taking His people to task.\u00a0 He says, \u201cYou're putting away your wives.\u00a0 You're putting away this wife of covenant, and I hate divorce.\u201d\u00a0 The thing that we forget is God is the sovereign administrator of every single covenant\u2014not only a covenant made between God and man, but a covenant made between man and man.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Friday, January 20<sup>th<\/sup>.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 How can you experience real fulfillment in marriage?\u00a0 We\u2019re going to talk about that today.\u00a0 Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us on the Friday edition.\u00a0 Today is the last opportunity I have to remind listeners about the special opportunity they have to sign up for one of our upcoming FamilyLife <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> marriage getaways that we\u2019re going to be hosting this spring in cities all across the country.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you sign up today or by the end of the weekend\u2014you\u2019ve got through the weekend to do this.\u00a0 If you sign up today, we\u2019re offering for <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners a buy one, get one free opportunity.\u00a0 You buy one registration to the conference, and we\u2019ll throw in your spouse\u2019s registration for free.\u00a0 Really, it\u2019s a one-week, half-price opportunity.\u00a0 Today is the last day we\u2019ve got to talk about it.\u00a0 The weekend is almost upon us, and this is the last weekend for you to take advantage of this.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me encourage you\u2014go to FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 Find out when the conference is coming to a city near where you live, check and make sure that weekend works for you; and then, you can sign up online.\u00a0 Keep in mind you\u2019ve got to identify yourself as a <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listener.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHere\u2019s how you do that.\u00a0 As you\u2019re filling out the registration form, when you come to the promo code box, type my name in\u2014type \u201cBOB\u201d.\u00a0 Then, when you finish the registration, we\u2019ll automatically deduct the cost of one registration; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and say, \u201cI heard about the special offer for <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners.\u00a0 I\u2019ve got some questions.\u201d\u00a0 We\u2019ll answer whatever questions you have.\u00a0 We can get you signed up over the phone.\u00a0 Again, the number is 1-800-FL-TODAY.\u00a0 Online, you\u2019ll find us at FamilyLifeToday.com.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDo it today in order to take advantage of these savings.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKeep in mind\u2014the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> comes with an unconditional, money-back guarantee.\u00a0 If for any reason, you want your registration fee back; we\u2019ll return it to you\u2014no questions asked.\u00a0 So, you really can\u2019t lose.\u00a0 You\u2019ve got an opportunity to save some money if we hear from you before the weekend is over.\u00a0 1-800-FL-TODAY is the number; or go online at FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 We hope you have a great time this spring at one of the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaways.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, at this point, with the guest that we\u2019ve got on the program today, I\u2019m just going to go ahead\u2014check out, say goodbye.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, you know what?\u00a0 It\u2019s interesting\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019ll see you in about\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, I\u2019m going to join you, Bob.\u00a0 (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You coming, too?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, I'll tell you what\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I love you guys.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 We love you, too.\u00a0 Well, she has written a book called <em>A Marriage Without Regrets<\/em>.\u00a0 Today, I want to talk about something that Bob and I would\u2014we wouldn't find it difficult to do because I don't have a problem representing Scripture; but it has to do with the next generation of daughters that we're raising and the young women coming out of our homes, our youth groups, college programs and entering into a commitment with a man to forge and form a marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, I know Kay, because you've made it very clear you embrace Scripture, that you have some very solid convictions when it comes to a woman who has decided that God is calling her to be a man's wife.\u00a0 When she enters into that covenant, she's making a decision about the rest of her life; isn't she?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Exactly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 She\u2019s making a relational commitment to a man to support him, come alongside him, and to\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2014be what she was created to be.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2014be a helpmate.\u00a0 Now, that doesn\u2019t mean she becomes a non-person.\u00a0 That doesn\u2019t mean that she\u2019s worth less than him.\u00a0 It\u2019s not a matter of <em>value<\/em>.\u00a0 It\u2019s a matter of call, and it\u2019s a matter of God\u2019s design. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Exactly.\u00a0 One of the chapters in my book is called \u201cWhat Is My Value as a Woman?\u201d\u00a0\u00a0 I want you to know it does not precede the chapter on men.\u00a0 The chapter on men, \u201cThe Role of a Man\u201d, comes <em>before<\/em> my chapter on \u201cWhat Is My Value as a Woman?\u201d\u00a0 I believe the man is the leader.\u00a0 I believe the man is to love his wife as Christ loved the church.\u00a0 I believe what the Bible says\u2014just like you.\u00a0 You know?\u00a0 He's to love her sacrificially, he's to nourish her, and he is to cherish her.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe thing that we forget is God is the sovereign administrator of every single covenant\u2014not only a covenant made between God and man, but a covenant made between man and man.\u00a0 You see that throughout the Scripture.\u00a0 As I enter into covenant, I have a role in that covenant.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs a woman, I have a role.\u00a0 If I'm going to be married, then, I am created as a helpmeet, a counterpart, a \u201ccomplementer\u201d, a completer to that man\u2014not a \u201ccompeter\u201d.\u00a0 Well, I have to understand that I was not created male.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t create two males.\u00a0 He created a male and a female.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, if I'm going to have a strong marriage, if I\u2019m going to raise godly children, I have to see that, as a woman, that my career\u2014and it\u2019s a high, high career\u2014my career is motherhood.\u00a0 My career is being the homemaker.\u00a0 My career is being the wife that I should be.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Let's just move it down to the bottom line.\u00a0 You believe that a wife, when she moves into a covenant relationship with her husband\u2014do you believe when they make the decision or they're blessed by God to have children, should she be working outside the home?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, I don't believe that she should.\u00a0 The Bible very definitely teaches that those are my responsibilities.\u00a0 Now, the husband plays a big role with the children, but I am to be the <em>keeper<\/em> of the home.\u00a0 I am to see that that home is in order.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, ideally, and if I want the very best\u2014I don\u2019t want any regrets, and I\u2019m not looking at today, and I\u2019m not looking at me, but I\u2019m looking at tomorrow, and I\u2019m looking at the fact that God opened my womb\u2014God gave me these children, and they need mothering.\u00a0 I mean, I can tell you story after story.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe bought a lie in the '60s.\u00a0 We bought a lie that women needed to be independent, that women needed a career.\u00a0 Do you remember that ad about being an Enjoli<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> woman?\u00a0 \u201cI can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and never let you forget that you're a man.\u00a0 I'm an Enjoli woman.\u201d\u00a0 So, now we say, \u201cI can bring home the bacon, I can fry it up in a pan; but I am too tired to let you know that you're a man.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat's the problem\u2014we are <em>tired<\/em>, our children are tired, our husbands are tired.\u00a0 When you\u2014I\u2019m talking about being <em>physically<\/em>, <em>physically<\/em> tired\u2014she\u2019s out in the marketplace doing whatever.\u00a0 Then, she comes home.\u00a0 She still has the laundry\u2014even if she has a housekeeper.\u00a0 In this book, <em>Marriage Without Regrets<\/em>, you can go into the financial section, and you can find out it is possible for you to stay home financially. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, I'm not talking about a single mother.\u00a0 I'm saying God knows and He understands those situations.\u00a0 There are answers there, but we're not dealing with that right now.\u00a0 We're dealing with a husband and a wife.\u00a0 I would say, \u201cDarling, stay home.\u00a0 Take care of that house.\u00a0 Don\u2019t let another person raise your children.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe don\u2019t realize, for instance, how important touch is to a child.\u00a0 We don\u2019t realize what happens just hormonally and what is secreted within a person\u2019s body just by reaching over, touching, patting, and rubbing.\u00a0 In the book, I share\u2014they\u2019ve done experiments with premature infants; they have done experiments with children\u2014we brought a child into this earth; <em>we<\/em> are responsible to take care of them\u2014not a surrogate mother.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, it's interesting, Kay, there is a generation of young families that are starting today, and that is not their perspective.\u00a0 The perspective is that, \u201cWe both need to work.\u00a0 We need a certain standard of living, a certain style of living.\u201d\u00a0 There are even a number of them, Kay\u2014and I know I\u2019m moving on to some touchy ground here, additionally\u2014who are so involved in ministries, so involved\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2014in the work of ministry, that they are abandoning their husbands and their children at home for the work of God out in the marketplace, so to speak.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Exactly, the Christian market place.\u00a0 They think that that is going to be honored by God, and they think they are giving God first place.\u00a0 See, they are not giving God first place because what\u2019s happened is\u2014let me go back to the 1960\u2019s.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn 1963, Betty Friedan really\u2014in essence, the Feminist Movement was launched.\u00a0 In 1963, I found out what it was like to be a real woman\u2014I got saved.\u00a0 So, she's launching this movement of independence, and I'm finding out the results of that independence with what I did and where I ended up.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I want to stop you there\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2014because what was launched in the early '60s was a different ideology that told women to find their power, their influence, their fulfillment, somewhere else other than being submissive to any higher authority\u2014whether it be God, a man in marriage, or to their family.\u00a0 It was an encouragement for a woman to become independent.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI believe the scourge of the divorce rate can absolutely be traced backwards to the escapism that was launched by the Feminist Movement in the mid-60\u2019s; and now, has been embraced and taught like the Bible on our college campuses and universities for the past three decades.\u00a0 So, we have an entire generation of men and women\u2014Christians who have bought into a lie that a woman is to be powerful, a woman is to seek her own fulfillment.\u00a0 We're talking about married women at this point.\u00a0 I'm not speaking about those who do enter the marketplace.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, let's be quick to add here that the Feminist Movement was born out of men who had failed to fulfill their responsibilities as husbands and as fathers, who had left wives restless, who had undervalued and under-appreciated their involvement at home\u2014leaving that restlessness in the heart of a woman.\u00a0 It's not something we can simply point to women and say, \u201cYou led us down the primrose path.\u201d\u00a0 We, as the guardians of the city, we men, let down our guard.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 If men had been men and they had loved their wives, they had cared for them spiritually, they had nourished them, and cherished them, and given them value and esteem, and helped exalt them, and see their gifts used, and proclaimed them, and honored them in the marketplace as being the shapers of the next generation, I don\u2019t believe much of the Feminist Movement would have ever occurred.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMany of those women who gave birth to the Feminist Movement came from such dysfunctional families.\u00a0 It was out of their own angry, spiritually-darkened heart toward men, that they gave birth to the Feminist Movement in the first place.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Exactly.\u00a0 In my book, in the chapter on my value as a woman\u2014what happened?\u00a0 We believed the feminist lie.\u00a0 Then, I take it one step back, and I take you across the ocean to Julius Wellhausen, when he was the one that introduced higher criticism.\u00a0\u00a0 In other words, \u201cThe Bible contains the Word of God, but it's not the Word of God.\u00a0 It has error in it.\u201d\u00a0 So, we believed that lie.\u00a0 That lie blew across the ocean, came to the United States of America, landed in seminaries.\u00a0 The seminaries that stood for the Word of God became cemeteries because Jesus\u2019 words are Spirit, and they are Life.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, they say they're not true.\u00a0 Man, then, without the Word of God, starts living according to his own understanding.\u00a0 Living to his own understanding, he doesn't know how to treat a woman.\u00a0 Then, what you hear is just, \u201cWives submit.\u201d\u00a0 You don't hear, \u201cHusbands, love your wives\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong> \u2014\u201cas Christ loved the church\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2014\u201cgave Himself for a sacrifice.\u201d\u00a0 You don't hear that.\u00a0 Alright, so then, the Word gets twisted.\u00a0 That\u2019s all they\u2019re hearing.\u00a0 People don\u2019t study the Word.\u00a0 They don\u2019t know the Word.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAlong then, like you say, women are not being treated right.\u00a0 Women are hurting.\u00a0 So, along comes Betty Friedan with a message that actually came out in 1895.\u00a0 It described a woman feminist as a woman who has in her the capacity of, \u201cFighting your way back to independence.\u201d\u00a0 That was back in April 27, 1895, in this edition of this publication.\u00a0 That's where the root of it comes from.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo then, we believe the lie; and I take it back to the Garden of Eden.\u00a0 How did we get in trouble?\u00a0 Eve believed the lie.\u00a0 The lie was that, \u201cGod doesn't mean what He says, and you're not going to suffer the consequences if you eat of the fruit of this tree.\u00a0 You can be as God\u201d\u2014now, what is that?\u00a0 \u201cYou can be independent.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Okay, what if a woman is working today because her husband has told her he wants her in the marketplace?\u00a0 She's got \u201csubmit to your husband\u201d on one side; God saying, \u201cBe a lover at home.\u201d\u00a0 What does she do?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Let's add a little flavor to this.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Let's say one of the reasons why he is wanting his wife to work is to support some of his hobbies\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2014that he enjoys, okay?\u2014some of his sports that he partakes of on the weekend.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 One of the things that we have to understand is that, \u201cYes,\u201d a woman is to submit.\u00a0 She is to be under his order.\u00a0 She is to submit to him as to the Lord.\u00a0 The woman is not anything less as a person because she's a woman.\u00a0 God made them <em>equal<\/em>.\u00a0 God made them to <em>rule<\/em> over His creation.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 So, she's just as intelligent as he is\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2014she's just as gifted as he is\u2014there has to be a head.\u00a0 So, she goes to the head and she says, \u201cLook, this is what God says,\u201d or, \u201cLet's find out what God says.\u00a0 You're asking me to do something; now, let's see what the Word of God says.\u201d\u00a0 I believe, then, you sit down; you study the Word of God.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, the husband is brought face-to-face with, \u201cWhat does God say about the woman?\u00a0 What does God say about the man?\u201d\u00a0 Then, he becomes responsible.\u00a0 So, she comes back.\u00a0 She says, \"Look, this is what it's going to do.\u00a0 This is what it's going to cost us, and this is not according to the Word of God.\u00a0 Now, are you willing to trust God?\u00a0 Are you willing to be obedient to God?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cAre you willing to watch God provide our needs?\u00a0 I'm willing to live on this kind of a budget.\u00a0 Alright, I'm willing to do this.\u00a0 Now, are you willing?\u201d\u00a0 If he says, \u201cNo, I want you to work,\u201d then, what I would do is I would start fasting, I would continue to pray, and I would say, \u201cGod, it's down to this.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to obey him.\u00a0 You're going to have to bring him in line.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 In that, you're exhorting that wife not to resent her husband's lack of direction, passivity, maybe wrong values, disobedience to the Scriptures, or his lack of understanding of the weight that this is upon his wife.\u00a0 I hear a strong exhortation there to embrace God and not become embittered towards your husband because your kids will feel that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Exactly.\u00a0 See, the thing is\u2014and I tell women this all the time\u2014it is <em>not <\/em>your responsibility to make your husband holy.\u00a0 That's God's.\u00a0 That's between God and your husband.\u00a0 <em>44444<\/em> task is to make him happy.\u00a0 Happy means that you provide the circumstances, the happenstance, where you get out of the way so that you are not the adversary.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 You need to continue\u2014see, a woman is smart if she knows what a man's basic needs are.\u00a0 A man has two basic fears.\u00a0 One is the fear of being ruled over by a woman.\u00a0 The second is the fear of being found inadequate.\u00a0 That's why He says\u2014and these are the two commands He gives to a woman\u2014reverence your husband.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, if I do that, then, I'm doing what 1 Peter, Chapter 3 says, \u201cI get out of the way.\u00a0 If I have a husband that is disobedient to the Word, then, I <em>win<\/em> him without a word.\u00a0 I <em>win<\/em> him with my spirit.\u00a0 I <em>win<\/em> him with my genuine winsomeness.\u201d\u00a0 I\u2019m to remember that someday I\u2019m going to stand before a holy God, and I don\u2019t want a marriage with regrets; I want one without regrets.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That's what you write about in your book, <em>A Marriage Without Regrets\u2014<\/em>is for a husband or a wife to lean upon Jesus Christ and to gain his or her joy from Him rather than gaining that sense of joy and, really, circumstantial pleasure just from things going right in the marriage relationship.\u00a0 You're calling people to dig into their relationship with Christ\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Exactly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2014and to grow there first.\u00a0 Bob, I've got to believe our listeners are going to benefit greatly from a book like this because, as you might predict, this is a very thoroughly biblical book and is one that points people back to the Source and the Maker of marriage in the first place.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, just like today's broadcast has been challenging to some of your thinking, perhaps\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Bless your hearts.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2014the book's going to be challenging to your thinking.\u00a0 Here's what I'd say, \u201cIf you listened to the program today, and it made you flush in the face, you got a little angry, and you said, \u2018I don't like what she's saying.\u00a0 I don't agree with her, and I don't think that's right,\u2019 I'd encourage you to get the book, read it, then, study the Scriptures, and see if she's wrong.\u00a0 If she's wrong, write her and tell her she's wrong.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 If she's right, and if what she's writing does bear out with what the Scriptures teach, then, you have to deal with the issue, \u201cAm I going to do what the Scriptures have called me to do?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Everyone has got a life that they're wagering, based upon something.\u00a0 The question is, \u201cIs it going to be a life wagered in faith, in trust, and dependence upon the Word of God and the blueprints he's given us?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 The book that Kay has written is called <em>A Marriage Without Regrets.<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em>We have copies of her book available in our FamilyLife Resource Center.\u00a0 Go online at FamilyLifeToday.com for more information on how you can get a copy of the book.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, the website is FamilyLifeToday.com; or call toll-free at 1-800-FL-TODAY, 1-800-358-6329; and we\u2019ll make arrangements to send a copy of Kay\u2019s book out to you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, don\u2019t forget.\u00a0 This is the last opportunity I\u2019m going to have to remind you of this special offer we\u2019ve been making this week for <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners.\u00a0 Sign up for an upcoming FamilyLife <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway.\u00a0 When you register this week and identify yourself as a <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listener, you will save 50 percent on your registration cost.\u00a0 It\u2019s a buy one, get one free registration.\u00a0 You pay full price for yourself, and your spouse comes absolutely free; but you\u2019ve got to sign up today, or at least by the end of the weekend, to take advantage of the special offer.\u00a0 It expires at the end of the weekend.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGo online at FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 You can investigate, find out when the conference is going to be in a city near where you live or a city you\u2019d like to go to on a weekend that works for you.\u00a0 Once you\u2019re ready to sign up, fill out the registration form online and type my name\u2014just type, \u201cBOB\u201d\u2014in the promo code box.\u00a0 That way, we will know you\u2019ve been listening to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, and you\u2019ll qualify for the special offer.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOr simply call 1-800-FL-TODAY and ask any questions you have about the conference.\u00a0 We can get you registered over the phone.\u00a0 Just make sure you mention you heard about the special offer on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, and you\u2019ll qualify for that.\u00a0 Again, it\u2019s a buy one, get one free offer.\u00a0 By the way, the registration comes with a complete money-back guarantee.\u00a0 If you come and, for any reason, you want your registration fee refunded, we\u2019ll send it back to you\u2014no questions asked.\u00a0 You really can\u2019t lose on this deal.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, the website is FamilyLifeToday.com; call 1-800-FL-TODAY to register over the phone.\u00a0 Plan to join us this spring at one of our upcoming FamilyLife <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaways.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBy the way, as most of you are aware, there are a number of U.S. servicemen and women who are coming home, finally, after a long tour overseas.\u00a0 As you know, it can often be challenging at home when a mom or a dad is back on the scene after having been gone for a long period of time.\u00a0 Here, at FamilyLife, we have established a scholarship fund to try to send as many service people and their spouses to one of our <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaways this spring as possible.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are asking you, \u201cIf you can, help make a contribution to that scholarship fund.\u201d\u00a0 We\u2019re calling it, \u201cThe Finally Home to Family\u201d scholarship fund.\u00a0 All you have to do is go to FamilyLifeToday.com and click on the link that says, \u201cFinally Home to Family\u201d; or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY and just mention that you\u2019d like to make a donation to the scholarship fund for service people, \u201cThe Finally Home to Family\u201d scholarship fund.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019d like to make a donation using a text message, text the word, \u201cHOME\u201d, to the number 28950; and you\u2019ll get instructions on how to make a donation using your mobile device.\u00a0 Again, the word is \u201cHOME\u201d\u2014text that to 28950.\u00a0 Let me just say, \u201cThanks,\u201d on behalf of these service people and their spouses for your participation in this scholarship fund.\u00a0 We\u2019re hoping that we can see thousands of these servicemen and women and their spouses at an upcoming FamilyLife <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway, thanks to your generosity.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWith that, we\u2019ve got to wrap things up for this week.\u00a0 Thanks for being with us.\u00a0 Hope you have a great weekend.\u00a0 Hope you can join us back on Monday when we\u2019re going to hear from Pastor Mark Driscoll and his wife Grace about what real marriage looks like.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to start off Monday by hearing a little bit about their very real marriage and some of the challenges that they have faced.\u00a0 I hope you can tune in.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back Monday for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 2012 FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/302447","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=302447"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=302447"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=302447"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=302447"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=302447"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=302447"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=302447"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}