{"id":302403,"date":"2011-11-15T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2011-11-15T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/controlling-your-emotions\/"},"modified":"2011-11-15T12:00:00","modified_gmt":"2011-11-15T17:00:00","slug":"controlling-your-emotions","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/controlling-your-emotions\/","title":{"rendered":"Controlling Your Emotions"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Are you controlling your emotions?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-11-15.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"23.12M","filesize_raw":"24243581","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2822],"tags":[4722,5161],"podcast_series":[7839],"cwp_profile":[9248],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302403","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-growing-in-your-faith","tag-christianity","tag-emotions","podcast_series-feelings-and-faith","cwp_profile-brian-borgman","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302403\/controlling-your-emotions","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302403\/controlling-your-emotions","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"NnxXFsXseb\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/controlling-your-emotions\/\">Controlling Your Emotions<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/controlling-your-emotions\/embed\/#?secret=NnxXFsXseb\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Controlling Your Emotions&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"NnxXFsXseb\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg",508,508,false]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"kfairris@familylife.com","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/kfairrisfamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"Are you controlling your emotions?","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-11-15.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Sometimes when your emotions are all stirred up, all riled up, you need to start preaching to yourself.\u00a0 You need to tell yourself what\u2019s really true.\u00a0 Here is Brian Borgman.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 We are bringing the Word of God to bear on faulty thinking because, again, you <em>cannot <\/em>make a disconnection between thinking and <em>feeling<\/em>.\u00a0 So when we are <em>thinking<\/em> in ways that are dishonoring to God, we need to actually come back with <em>truth<\/em> and <em>combat<\/em> those faulty thoughts with God\u2019s Word.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Tuesday, November 15<sup>th<\/sup>.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife\u00ae, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 Counseling our soul with what is true; well, it\u2019s easier said than done.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to talk about <em>how<\/em> we do it, though, today.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us.\u00a0 You know, as we talk this week about emotions and about how we\u2019re to understand them biblically, how we\u2019re to express them, how we\u2019re to process them, I guess I\u2019ve never really asked the question, \u201cIs it possible to have sinful joy?\u201d\u00a0 We always go right to those destructive, negative, bad emotions.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Like anger.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Anger, fear, anxiety.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Lust.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right; but is it possible to have sinful happiness, sinful joy, sinful peace?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, let\u2019s ask our guest.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I think we should.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Brian Borgman joins us again on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 What about it, Brian?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Absolutely.\u00a0 If you take joy in the wrong things, if the object is wrong, then the affection is wrong.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And I guess it\u2019s possible to delight too much.\u00a0 Is it possible to delight too much, even in a good thing?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Probably.\u00a0 I don\u2019t know exactly what that might feel like, but I\u2019m willing to give it a shot and see.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I could imagine someone who really liked chocolate.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right, who delights in chocolate, and there\u2019s nothing wrong with delighting in chocolate; is there?\u00a0 Please tell me there\u2019s nothing wrong with delighting in chocolate.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, not in just delighting in chocolate; but if you take it to the extreme\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to introduce Brian to our listeners.\u00a0 He\u2019s a pastor, he\u2019s a writer, he and his wife Ariel have been married for 20 years in northwest Nevada; and he\u2019s written a book called <em>Feelings and Faith.<\/em>\u00a0 In the front of your book, you have a quote by a very famous English preacher.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou\u2019d have to know who this guy is.\u00a0 Brian, you do.\u00a0 You quote him.\u00a0 Martin Lloyd Jones is his name.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 The Doctor.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 He is a brilliant theologian.\u00a0 You wouldn\u2019t expect him to make a quote or a comment about emotions, as you share in your book.\u00a0 I just want to read this.\u00a0 He says:\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0<em>I regard it as a great part of my calling in the ministry to emphasize the priority of the mind and the intellect in connection with the faith.<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>But though I maintain that, I am equally ready to assert that the feelings, the emotions, the sensibilities, obviously, are of very vital importance.<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em><em>We have been made in such a way that they play a dominant part of our makeup.<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em><em>Indeed, I suppose that one of the greatest problems in our life in this world, not only for Christians but for all people, is the right handling of our feelings and emotions.<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou really believe that, and that\u2019s why you wrote this book.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Absolutely.\u00a0 I\u2019ve seen it over and over, and Lloyd Jones encapsulates that for us.\u00a0 Again, you wouldn\u2019t think that he, the British preacher, would have emphasized such a thing; but he gets onto something that I think is absolutely critical.\u00a0 We don\u2019t <em>think<\/em> about the emotions properly, and we don\u2019t <em>handle<\/em> the emotions properly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I think many of us have this sense that the way we\u2019re supposed to deal with our emotions is to try to deaden them as much as possible because, if we deaden them, then they can\u2019t bite us.\u00a0 If we can just take some of the teeth out of them, if we can short-circuit some of the feeling, just dial it back, then we can live life in a very controlled way; and we don\u2019t get too angry and we just stay mild-mannered, and everything is okay.\u00a0 What\u2019s wrong with that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, first of all, it\u2019s not realistic.\u00a0 The idea that somehow you\u2019re able to just scale them back is just unrealistic; but it\u2019s more than unrealistic.\u00a0 I think it\u2019s unbiblical because we are actually to reflect the image and likeness of the Lord Jesus, and Jesus did not scale back his emotional life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 To illustrate what you\u2019re talking about here\u2014I would say the first half of our married life\u2014Barbara and I are coming up on 39 years of marriage\u2014and so you kind of look at it in decades.\u00a0 They kind of run together, and so now it\u2019s 20 and 20\u2014but I\u2019d say the first half of our years together, I was too free in expressing my emotions when my expectations went unmet.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m looking back on that now thinking, \u201cI wish I\u2019d been a little more mature and schooled,\u201d according to your book and what you\u2019ve written about here because I wasn\u2019t handling my emotions as God would have me handle them.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo I look at how I\u2019ve handled emotions in the second half of our marriage; and I take a step back and I go, \u201cYou know, I\u2019ve learned that it\u2019s not always best to express everything you\u2019re feeling.\u201d\u00a0 But it is good to express the disappointment, the unmet expectation, and to talk about that\u2014but not have it energized or <em>flaming <\/em>with the emotion fueling around it.\u00a0 Do you agree?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Correct.\u00a0 Correct.\u00a0 It comes down to, \u201cAre you going to control the emotion and the display of it, or is it going to control you?\u201d\u00a0 The minute it\u2019s controlling you, you\u2019re not being controlled by the Holy Spirit.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You tell a story about speaking in a prison, illustrating what we are talking about here.\u00a0\u00a0 There was a guy who got angry with you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 I was preaching in the drug and alcohol unit; and I was talking about how our will, our choosing faculty, is really bound to our sinful nature.\u00a0 And he was getting angrier and angrier, visibly angry.\u00a0 Finally, he just blurted out, \u201cAre you telling me that I\u2019m not free to do what I want to do?\u201d\u00a0 I said, \u201cYes, that\u2019s exactly what I\u2019m saying.\u00a0 I think that\u2019s what the Bible is teaching.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cIf you\u2019re not a Christian\u201d\u2014is what you\u2019re saying.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\u00a0 \u201cIf you\u2019re not a Christian\u201d; right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cIf you\u2019re not a Christian, you\u2019re <em>enslaved <\/em>to your sinful, selfish nature.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Exactly.\u00a0 And, of course, he blurted out that he was in firm disagreement with me; and so I just asked him.\u00a0 I said, \u201cWhat are you in here for?\u00a0 Is it a drug- or alcohol-related offense?\u201d\u00a0 Of course, I knew what the answer was because we were in the drug and alcohol unit; and he looked at me and he said, \u201cYeah.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo I just asked a simple question.\u00a0 I just said, \u201cWell, haven\u2019t you ever just <em>decided<\/em> to stop?\u201d\u00a0 And he said, \u201cMore times than you could imagine.\u201d\u00a0 And I said, \u201cWell, if you\u2019re so free, then just stop.\u201d\u00a0 It just illustrates that we are enslaved; and when Christ comes, He sets us free.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I want to ask you about the emotion of fear.\u00a0 I have been at the top of buildings, looking over the side; and I don\u2019t like to get too close to the side.\u00a0 Somehow I\u2019ll stand there and my mind just kind of goes to the thought of tumbling over the side, and I\u2019ll just back away.\u00a0 You know people who have fears and phobias that control their lives; and they would say to you, \u201cI hate that, but there is nothing I can do about it.\u201d\u00a0 Is there something they can do about their fear?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 Let me say, Bob, that if you\u2019re feeling a little queasy right next to the edge of a high building and you feel fear, then that\u2019s God\u2019s way of saying, \u201cStep back\u201d; alright?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Okay\u2014so good.\u00a0 (Laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 There are good fears like that.\u00a0 I wish my youngest son had some more of them because fearlessness leads to multiple trips to the emergency room, but the idea that I am <em>captive<\/em> to my fears is just simply not true.\u00a0 We have a man in our church, and I love this brother.\u00a0 When I first met him, he was a mess.\u00a0 I mean he was a mess.\u00a0 He had been in law enforcement for a number of years, and he suffered from panic attacks.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe doctors had him on all kinds of stuff to try to control the panic attacks; and the whole issue of medication is a real touchy, sensitive issue.\u00a0 But as I talked to him, I began to realize that he had a very, very small view of God and, actually, a quite mistaken view of God.\u00a0 But he is so much better off than he was a number of years ago because he came to understand God\u2019s love for him, the security that he has in Christ, and started to learn some biblical tools to deal with that fear and anxiety.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 It is interesting that the Bible has a number of commands that tell us not to fear.\u00a0 So the angel comes to Mary and says, \u201cDon\u2019t be afraid.\u201d\u00a0 We can read that, and it\u2019s kind of like he\u2019s just trying to calm her down; but he\u2019s really telling her that, \u201cWhat you\u2019re feeling\u2014stop feeling that.\u201d\u00a0 Okay, how do I stop feeling that if that\u2019s what I\u2019m feeling?\u00a0 Is there a way to stop feeling fear if I\u2019m feeling it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Absolutely, and I\u2019m glad you asked that question because I\u2019d like for you to look at a passage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Alright.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 You guys do that; right?\u00a0 Look at Bibles?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 We do that; yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 All the time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 In Isaiah 41, God is speaking to the generation that one day would be exiled and hoping to come back to the land.\u00a0 God says in Isaiah 41:10, \u201cDo not fear.\u201d\u00a0 That\u2019s the command to stop feeling afraid; alright?\u00a0 Then He tells them <em>why<\/em> they are going to be able to not fear\u2014\u201cfor I am with you.\u00a0 Do not look anxiously about you, for I am your God.\u00a0 I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo God not only gives us the command to stop fearing, but He also gives us the reasons why.\u00a0 Generally speaking, fear comes down to, \u201cStop thinking wrong things; start thinking right things.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn the book, I tell a story about my wife and I when I was a seminary student.\u00a0 We were as poor as church mice, and I did subcontracting janitorial work.\u00a0 My bread and butter job was an $800-a-month account.\u00a0 Now this is 20 years ago, but that might as well as been $80,000-a-month to us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 It was what you needed.\u00a0 If you didn\u2019t have it, you weren\u2019t going to pay the bills.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\u00a0 No groceries, no utilities.\u00a0\u00a0 So I got a call that they wanted to talk to me.\u00a0 I felt a little anxiety about that, but then thought maybe they are just going to talk to me about some extra cleaning duties or something.\u00a0 But then, I was cleaning in the library a few days later; and I found a new janitorial contract in the copy machine.\u00a0 So I knew what that meant was we were out because we were underbid by at least $200 a month.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo that twinge of anxiety went straight to fear; and I started thinking about, \u201cHow am I going to take care of my wife, how am I going to take care of my baby daughter?\u201d\u00a0 I was just beside myself.\u00a0 That went on for a couple days; but the morning of the meeting, for whatever reason\u2014the Holy Spirit does these things; right?\u00a0 I thought, \u201cPreach \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIsaiah 41:10 to yourself.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt was a text that I had memorized; and as I sat there waiting for this meeting, I kept preaching that text to myself.\u00a0 \u201cDo not be afraid.\u00a0 I am your God; I am with you.\u201d\u00a0 The reality of God being with me, being for me, upholding me, gave me the <em>assurance<\/em> that He was not going to let me starve.\u00a0 He was not going to let our family be destitute. A lot of times it is preaching the truth of God to ourselves that helps us handle our emotions.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I just want to point out the obvious because you took us to the Scripture, which tells us the truth about ourselves, about our circumstances, and about who God is.\u00a0 It is, ultimately, as we align ourselves and have the Scriptures in our minds, that we can begin to combat some of these emotions that otherwise we would be in bondage to.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat you\u2019re saying is, \u201cYou preached it to yourself.\u201d\u00a0 Bob, one of your favorite quotes that has to do with this\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 It\u2019s from Martin Lloyd Jones, who talks about the fact that we spend way too much time listening to ourselves and not enough time preaching to ourselves.\u00a0 You\u2019re familiar with the quote.\u00a0 We feel the feelings and we think they are determinative and authoritative; and Lloyd Jones is saying, \u201cNo.\u00a0 We can train, we can teach, we can instruct our feelings.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 We can counsel our hearts.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\u00a0 Amen.\u00a0 Amen.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 So when we\u2019re feeling afraid, when you had that twinge, that anxiety, was it sinful to have it in the first place?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, I don\u2019t think that the initial sensation of it is inherently wrong.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Because you were responding to a God-given responsibility to provide for your family\u2014you know that\u2019s on your shoulders\u2014so that\u2019s appropriate to feel some concern there; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Exactly.\u00a0 If we go back to that definition of the emotions expressing what we value and how we evaluate, then that is going to happen.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 And we look at the biblical definition of what temptation is and when temptation becomes sin.\u00a0 It\u2019s only when we take the bait.\u00a0 Many times I think we\u2019re tempted to feel something and to allow it to control us but what God wants us to do is to turn from the temptation, and turn to Him, and say, \u201cLord, I need to remind my soul.\u00a0 I need to\u2014\u201d as Bob was saying, \u201cneed to counsel my soul\u2014preach to my soul\u2014the truth about life, the truth about You, and believe that.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s not just the power of positive thinking; we\u2019re talking about placing your faith in the one true living God at this point.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I always think of David, in the Psalms, who is experiencing depression, \u201cWhy so downcast, oh my soul?\u201d\u00a0 \u201cWhy am I feeling this way?\u201d\u00a0 And what does he say next?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cPut your hope in God.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 So he is preaching to himself, \u201cI should be trusting in God.\u00a0 This is where my confidence should be.\u00a0 I know I\u2019m feeling this thing.\u201d\u00a0 And that\u2019s not just trying to talk yourself out of what you\u2019re feeling or denying what you\u2019re feeling; is it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, not at all.\u00a0 In fact, this is <em>nothing<\/em> like self-help talk.\u00a0 This is actually <em>combating<\/em> lies with truth.\u00a0 We are bringing the Word of God to bear on faulty thinking because, again, you cannot make a disconnection between thinking and feeling.\u00a0 So when we are <em>thinking<\/em> in ways that are dishonoring to God, we need to actually come back with <em>truth<\/em> and <em>combat<\/em> those faulty thoughts with God\u2019s Word.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 It\u2019s a question of what is going to be authoritative in your life.\u00a0 Is it the emotion that\u2019s stirring up in you, or is it what God says is true?\u00a0 So when God says, \u201cI will never leave you or forsake you,\u201d and you\u2019re feeling anxiety about the job\u2014and, by the way, I\u2019m just curious.\u00a0 How long before the income was replaced?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 It was a struggle.\u00a0 I\u2019d love to say, \u201cAnd the next day we had a $1,000-a-month account,\u201d but that\u2019s not how it worked.\u00a0 We struggled for a few months, and then God provided a job that had benefits and everything else.\u00a0 I am thankful to God for that, but it doesn\u2019t always happen that way.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Sometimes He\u2019s taken you into a season of life where you\u2019re going to be challenged, and you\u2019re going to be called on to trust Him, and it\u2019s going to get hard, and the knuckles get white as you hang on; but God, in the end, brings you through; doesn\u2019t He?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, He does.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019m reminded of Romans Chapter 12.\u00a0 This doesn\u2019t speak of emotions, but it does speak of a way of thinking.\u00a0 It says, \u201cDo not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBrian, it\u2019s really easy to rush past this, but one of the things in your spiritual arsenal to deal with emotions was your own knowledge of the Bible and that you had committed some key passages to memory.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo I\u2019d say to that person who has a besetting emotion that tends to mug you and take you off into an area where you are in bondage to that emotion, dig into the Bible and find a handful of great verses to address that emotion\u2014and to train your mind to think the way you counseled yourself.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And I just have to say here because some people will hear Dennis say that and they\u2019ll say, \u201cOh, there he goes.\u00a0 It\u2019s one of those simplistic \u2018take these two Bible verses and call me in the morning and everything will be fixed.\u2019\u201d\u00a0 Is there anything wrong with what Dennis has just said?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, it\u2019s actually great counsel.\u00a0 If we think about it in terms of, \u201cFirst of all, I have to breathe in certain truths all the time.\u00a0 I have to preach the Gospel to myself all the time.\u00a0 I have to live in the reality that God has accepted me in Christ because of His righteousness, His blood.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to have struggles in this life.\u00a0 I have to have a framework that is established by God\u2019s Word\u2014biblical truth.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen I also have to have that arsenal of those specific texts that deal with my specific problems.\u00a0 It is actually bringing the Word of God to bear in the power of the Holy Spirit that actually helps me to control my emotions.\u00a0 You actually have examples of this in the Bible.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 We had a couple who came to our <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> \u00ae marriage conference in Tulsa, Oklahoma.\u00a0 This woman sent a prayer request during the weekend, \u201cI\u2019m despairing of life and of this relationship.\u201d\u00a0 At the end of the conference, we ran across her evaluation.\u00a0 She said, \u201cShe and her fianc\u00e9\u201d\u2014so it wasn\u2019t a marriage; they were living together\u2014\u201chave decided to move out, and we\u2019re going to stay pure until we get married.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOn the other side of the evaluation, it had a box checked that she had received Jesus Christ as her Savior and Lord at the conference.\u00a0 I turned to a friend, as we were leaving the meeting, where we had heard that story; and I said, \u201cYou know, it\u2019s not that that young lady is not going to experience more struggles, more challenges, more temptations; but she now has the One who will empower her, enable her, and will help her when she fails to get back up and press on\u2014instead of being so despairing of life that she wanted to take her own life.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think we do have a lot of challenges in life, and I certainly don\u2019t want to make the Christian life out to be this simplistic, \u201cA plus B plus C equal D; and everything is going to be smooth sailing all the way to the end.\u201d\u00a0 That\u2019s not how it works.\u00a0 Faith is a constant struggle to maintain your belief and right understanding of who God is, His Word, and keep on exercising your faith.\u00a0 That\u2019s really what we\u2019re trying to help people to do here on this broadcast, Bob.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I think people, who have seen how their emotions and their response to their emotions can get them into trouble, can be dishonoring to the Lord, can damage relationships, I think they\u2019ll find real help in getting into a book like the one that Brian has written called <em>Feelings and Faith, <\/em>which we have in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGo online at FamilyLifeToday.com; and there will be information right there about the book, <em>Feelings and Faith<\/em>.\u00a0 You can order it from us online.\u00a0 Again, the website is FamilyLifeToday.com; or call toll-free 1-800-358-6329.\u00a0 That\u2019s probably easier to remember as 1-800- \u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\u00a0 When you get in touch with us, ask about Brian Borgman\u2019s book, <em>Feelings and Faith;<\/em> and we\u2019ll make arrangements to have a copy of it sent out to you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThanksgiving is just around the corner.\u00a0 I don\u2019t know what your family does in terms of celebrating that holiday, but I do hope you will be intentional about drawing your family\u2019s attention to the need to be grateful to God for His blessings.\u00a0 One way we can help you with that is by sending you a copy of Barbara Rainey\u2019s book, <em>Growing Together in Gratitude, <\/em>a devotional book for families\u2014seven stories all designed to promote the idea of gratefulness and thanksgiving in our hearts. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe book is our thank-you gift to you this month if you\u2019re able to help support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> with a donation.\u00a0 If you do that online at FamilyLifeToday.com, it\u2019s very easy.\u00a0 Click the button online that says, \u201cI Care\u201d; and that will take you straight to the page where you fill out the donation information.\u00a0 When you do that, we\u2019ll send you a copy of <em>Growing Together in Gratitude; <\/em>and we\u2019ll send you a Thanksgiving prayer card as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you make your donation by phone, just call us at 1-800-FLTODAY; and when you\u2019re done with the donation, just mention that you\u2019d like Barbara\u2019s book on gratitude.\u00a0 We will be happy to send it to you.\u00a0 We want to express our gratitude to you for your support of this ministry.\u00a0 We really do appreciate you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we hope you\u2019ll be back with us tomorrow.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to continue our conversation on faith and feelings and how those two come together.\u00a0 Brian Borgman will be here again; and I hope you can be, too.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back here next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 2011 FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/302403","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=302403"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=302403"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=302403"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=302403"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=302403"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=302403"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=302403"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}