{"id":302338,"date":"2011-08-10T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2011-08-10T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/neighbors-a-relationship-of-mercy\/"},"modified":"2011-08-10T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2011-08-10T15:00:00","slug":"neighbors-a-relationship-of-mercy","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/neighbors-a-relationship-of-mercy\/","title":{"rendered":"Neighbors&#8211;A Relationship of Mercy"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Who is your neighbor?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-08-10.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"21.51M","filesize_raw":"22549859","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2836],"tags":[4018,2588,4920,4996],"podcast_series":[7816],"cwp_profile":[8960],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302338","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-raising-girls","tag-dating","tag-teens","tag-womanhood","tag-young-women","podcast_series-becoming-a-true-woman-while-i-still-have-a-curfew","cwp_profile-susan-hunt","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302338\/neighbors-a-relationship-of-mercy","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302338\/neighbors-a-relationship-of-mercy","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"G3b31UpykE\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/neighbors-a-relationship-of-mercy\/\">Neighbors&#8211;A Relationship of Mercy<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/neighbors-a-relationship-of-mercy\/embed\/#?secret=G3b31UpykE\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Neighbors&#8211;A Relationship of Mercy&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"G3b31UpykE\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-08-10.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-08-10.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Unless we have this eternal perspective, we will become settlers and we will see this world as all there is.\u00a0 It is so important to have this eternal perspective where we see that we are moving towards something grand and glorious and that this world will never give us what will be ours when Jesus comes back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Wednesday, August 10<sup>th<\/sup>.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife\u00ae, Dennis Rainey; and I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We are going to talk today about what older women can do to cast an eternal vision for younger women, about what it means to be a godly woman.\u00a0 Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us.\u00a0 I was with a friend of mine, not long ago, and we were talking about fruitfulness in life.\u00a0 He said, \u201cYou know, I saw a study recently that said the most fruitful decade in a person\u2019s life\u201d\u2014\u00a0 What decade would you think would be the most fruitful decade in a person\u2019s life?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Number five or number six.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>He said that the 60s are the most fruitful decade in most people\u2019s lives.\u00a0 I thought, \u201cReally?\u00a0 The 60s?\u201d\u00a0 Then he said, \u201cYou know what number two is?\u201d\u00a0 I thought, \u201cWell yes; I would think it was the 50s.\u201d\u00a0 He said, \u201cNo, it\u2019s the 70s.\u201d\u00a0 He said, \u201c50s are next.\u201d\u00a0 I thought, \u201cWell, I still have some room ahead.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut ,I think our guest today is demonstrating fruitfulness does not end at the social\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis<\/strong>:\u00a0 You better be careful, Bob.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Does not end at the time Social Security kicks in.\u00a0 How does that sound?\u00a0 When you get your AARP card, that\u2019s not when fruitfulness ends.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 Susan Hunt joins us.\u00a0 Susan, I want to welcome you back to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Thank you very much.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Susan already mentioned her age on an earlier broadcast, and Bob was tiptoeing around that.\u00a0 I thought, \u201cBob, you are not going to say her age!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You are not embarrassed of your age, are you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I am very proud of it; I am 72.\u00a0 I just thank the Lord every day.\u00a0 It is a wonderful decade.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>And look at how fruitful your life has been in the last decade, in this decade.\u00a0 I mean, God is continuing to work through you to inspire women to embrace His design for womanhood.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, in the Scriptures, Anna was 84 when Mary went into the temple, and Anna blessed Mary.\u00a0 Do you remember that wonderful story?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I do, yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>And I find great encouragement for that.\u00a0 She was still fresh and green as the Psalmist said, at 84. So, let\u2019s hope.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You build your mentoring of younger women around the theme of legacy.\u00a0 You talk about the different relationships that a woman has in her lifetime\u2014that of being a daughter and expressing gratitude, being a sister and leaving a legacy of unity, (now that\u2019s real interesting one with sibling rivalry being what it is in families).\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen you talk about the theme of being a neighbor.\u00a0 And you know, honestly Susan, I think the idea of being a good neighbor today has been lost in this culture.\u00a0 We have got far too many fences and far too many entertainment trinkets in our homes.\u00a0 We just kind of \u201cwall up and hole up,\u201d and we don\u2019t reach out next door to our neighbors.\u00a0 My mom demonstrated this legacy of being a great neighbor.\u00a0 You really believe that\u2019s important, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I really think it is, even within our churches.\u00a0 So often, we are withdrawn and ingrown.\u00a0 The point of these different relationships is:\u00a0 With sister, we want the girls to understand our spiritual sisterhood in Christ and that that relationship\u2014our relationship with other Christians\u2014is going to be a bit different than our relationships with who we define as the \u201cneighbors.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe neighbors go back to the question that was asked of Jesus, \u201cWho is my neighbor?\u201d\u00a0 He went on to tell the parable of the Good Samaritan.\u00a0 So here, we are helping girls to see that we have relationships with Christians, and within our families, that go to one level; but that our reactions to those who are not Christians is going to be different.\u00a0 It is going to be a much more one-sided relationship, which is what the Gospel is.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong><strong>I<\/strong>n fact, you defined the sister relationship as pursuing the grace of unity\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Unity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>but in the neighbor relationship, we are not pursuing unity, necessarily.\u00a0 Right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Right, but rather it is mercy.\u00a0 This is an important discussion with our teen girls because many of them have friends who are not Christians.\u00a0 They are bit confused about their responses in those relationships.\u00a0 What we try to help them to see is that their response should be one of mercy, but that there is a level to which they cannot go with those relationships.\u00a0 Of course, then this also carries over into relationships with boys\u2014that they need to understand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>In fact, to pursue unity with your neighbor may be spiritually counterproductive.\u00a0 It may be spiritually destructive in your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Absolutely.\u00a0 This helps them to begin to get that distinction\u2014that we are not saying to them, \u201cDo not have non-Christian friends,\u201d but, \u201cYou have got to always be on guard that those friends are not influencing you, but you influencing those friends with mercy.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>What I hear you challenging and empowering women to do with their neighbors is to reach out in to their brokenness and where they are in need\u2014not of being judged\u2014but in need of mercy and looking at them through the eyes of Christ, in need of forgiveness and in need of knowing Him.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think it so easy with our neighbors to go, \u201cCan you believe what our neighbors have done here?\u00a0 You know, they are divorced.\u201d\u00a0 It is easy for the Christian community to really be judgmental.\u00a0 You are calling women to look at these neighbors and extend the Gospel of Jesus Christ to them in a very real way.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 The only reason I am a sister and a daughter, within God\u2019s family, is because of God\u2019s grace.\u00a0 So, I must look at the neighbors with great mercy, which hopefully will help our young girls and our women to look at their own neighbors in their neighborhoods, who are not Christians, with greater mercy.\u00a0 To even look beyond to community needs, where we can go out and be serving in the homeless shelters or the crisis pregnancy centers.\u00a0 We go with the mercy of Christ.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>One of the other relationships that you help women embrace is the relationship of being a wife.\u00a0 Again, some of the young women that you are talking to, they are not wives yet.\u00a0 They may grow up and have the gift of singleness.\u00a0 How are they to understand this wife relationship if they are not married?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>The grace that we are pointing them to is that of oneness.\u00a0 What we try to help the young women to see is that we must learn to glorify God in every relationship.\u00a0 We must learn to be life-givers in every relationship before marriage.\u00a0 Now, if God gives you marriage and you have learned to be a life-giver, then you bring that into the marriage.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLast summer, I was discipling a young college woman.\u00a0 She was on the West Coast; I was on the East Coast.\u00a0 We were doing this via e-mail, just to see how it would work.\u00a0 We never talked; we just emailed back and forth, put all of our thoughts into writing.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of her questions to me was, \u201cHow do I learn to be a life-giver when I don\u2019t even have a boyfriend?\u201d\u00a0 My answer was, \u201cNow is the time to learn to be a life-giver because if you wait until after marriage, you are going to have a lot to undo.\u201d\u00a0 So, you learn to be a life-giver; and then you bring all of those relational skills into the marriage.\u00a0 Whether a woman is married or not, we still need to learn that wonderful relational perspective of being life-givers. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Susan, whenever you think of the description of a godly woman, everybody always runs to Proverbs 31; but the rest of the Proverbs really speak on a number of occasions, challenging woman to be those life-givers.\u00a0 One of them is talking about how death and life are in the power of the tongue.\u00a0 A woman\u2019s words can either bring life or death to those people around her.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That is so descriptive, isn\u2019t it?\u00a0 It's just amazing.\u00a0 The power of words is incredible.\u00a0 One of the things that we talk about in the material is the ministry of encouragement.\u00a0 How do we learn to be encouragers with our words and with our actions?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat is such an important thing for women to learn is, \u201cHow do we learn to become women whose husbands can say, \u2018My heart is safe with her.\u2019?\u201d\u00a0 I will ask my husband sometimes, \u201cIs your heart safe with me?\u201d\u00a0 I encourage young women, \u201cThink about it.\u00a0 Is your husband\u2019s heart safe with you or does he fear your criticism, your disappointment, your expectations that he just cannot live up to, he can never get it right?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAll of those intangible ways are ways that we bring support into a marriage.\u00a0 It really begins with our own heart.\u00a0 Our husbands can read us.\u00a0 They can see if we are saying one thing, but on the inside, we are disappointed with them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Susan, as you were talking about a wife being a safe woman\u2014a safe wife to confide in and who comes alongside her husband\u2014that resonated with me.\u00a0 I think there are a lot of women who kind of eased forward on the edges of their seat.\u00a0 Can you share an illustration of what that looks like when a wife is being that safe woman for her husband?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan<\/strong>:\u00a0 It is something that has to grow over years.\u00a0 It is not just a one-time event, but I will give you a one-time illustration that I think will help us to see what it means.\u00a0 Many of our young men today are in very stressful situations in their jobs, with all of the unemployment.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur son-in-law who is such a wonderful godly man has been able to keep his job; but in so doing, his responsibilities have increased.\u00a0 He has probably tripled in his responsibilities.\u00a0 So, recently, he was away.\u00a0 The little eight-year-old began crying, \u201cI want my daddy.\u00a0 I want to see my daddy.\u00a0 I want to call my daddy.\u201d\u00a0 Then, the six-year-old pitched in.\u00a0 We women can really feed off each other; and so she began crying, same thing.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur daughter sat them both down and said, \u201cYour daddy has told you that you can call him anytime.\u00a0 The reason your daddy is away is because he is providing for us so that I can be at home with you.\u00a0 Now, you can call your daddy; but you are not going to call him, crying, because it would make him sad.\u00a0 It would make him feel guilty, and we are not going to do that to him.\u00a0 When you can call him and encourage him, and when you can call him and be happy, you can call.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe eight-year-old, Maggie, said, \u201cOhhh (sniffling). Ohhh (sniffling). Okay, I will wait until tomorrow;\u201d (laughter)\u00a0 and she did.\u00a0 Well, our daughter called me the next day and said, \u201cMom, did I do the right thing?\u201d\u00a0 I said, \u201cAbsolutely.\u00a0\u00a0 You are teaching those girls to be life-givers, not to make their dad feel guilty.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThose are the sorts of things that we need to do to help our husbands.\u00a0 We don\u2019t need to take out our frustrations and to make them feel that they are not doing their part.\u00a0 So often, young women have unrealistic expectations of their husbands; and we need to be encouragers.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, not only did your daughter train her daughters in the right direction; but I am thinking of the wives who call a husband who is away and go, \u201cCan't you come home?\u00a0 Do you have to go on that trip again?\u201d\u00a0 Instead of being the life-giver, instead of being a safe place where he can go and feel supported, she is eroding their relationship by doing that.\u00a0 Isn\u2019t she?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Absolutely.\u00a0 Then, when he does come in, so often she throws up her hands and says, \u201cI am done!\u00a0 You take over now,\u201d and he is exhausted.\u00a0 We need to understand that providing for a family is such a godly, sacrificial manly-thing.\u00a0 When men do that, we need to see it as a spiritual service; and we need to appreciate it.\u00a0 I am afraid, too often, women don\u2019t.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>It seems like some people are spontaneous or natural with their affirming words.\u00a0 They are just people who are always finding the good in others and saying it.\u00a0 Seems like other people\u2014it's just not natural\u2014and they have to do it, almost by a discipline.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, you seem like one of those natural kinds to me.\u00a0 I am guessing that around your house, you were just kind of naturally always looking for things you could affirm with Gene or with the kids.\u00a0 Is that the case, or did you have to train yourself to use your words to affirm?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Before I was a Christian, I was such a critical, negative person.\u00a0 I did have to learn.\u00a0 I had to begin to understand the power of words.\u00a0 I had to pray a lot; I had to repent a lot.\u00a0 God just changes our hearts.\u00a0 He really does!\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJust to say words with our mouths that we are not experiencing in our hearts, it's just flat and empty.\u00a0 All I can do is say, \u201cThank you, Jesus, that You changed my heart.\u00a0 You gave me such a love for You\u2014that You put the words in my heart.\u201d\u00a0 He really does.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I just have to\u2014I can\u2019t imagine a critical, hardhearted Susan Hunt.\u00a0 When did you come to faith?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I was 22.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>What was it?\u00a0 I mean, just tell the story of how God did a transforming work in your heart and the change that took place.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I grew up in the church, very religious and very proud; but a time came when I was so empty, right after college, that I did not know what to do.\u00a0 I had to do something religious, and so I went to seminary to study Christian education.\u00a0 In a seminary class, I heard the Gospel.\u00a0 I had thought up to that time that I had to earn my salvation, \u201cBe good enough and you go to heaven.\u00a0 If you are not good enough, you don\u2019t go to heaven.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere, I heard the Gospel.\u00a0 My ears were opened to the Gospel for the first time.\u00a0 Everything I had learned growing up as a child, all the Bible verses I had learned, suddenly came alive, suddenly made sense.\u00a0 God intervened in my heart and turned me to Himself.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>What did you hear that was different than, \u201cYou have got to perform this way in order to please God?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I am not sure that there was anything different or whether my ears were just stopped and the Lord did not open them.\u00a0 Whatever is the case, at first I was pretty bitter because I thought, \u201cWhy did no one ever tell me this before?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen I began to understand the sovereignty of God; and I thought, \u201cThey probably did.\u201d\u00a0 What all of that did in me was to create such a passion to be sure that no children or youth in our churches ever went all the way through and they did not hear the Gospel.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>The Gospel is that, \u201cPerforming your way into God\u2019s presence never works,\u201d but, \u201cthat God Himself has done what we need to:\u00a0 He has been perfectly obedient; He has kept all of the Law.\u00a0 When we trust Him, when we follow Him, when we surrender our lives and become His slaves, He has accomplished what we could never accomplish on our own.\u201d\u00a0 That\u2019s where the transformed life comes, as we yield and surrender to him.\u00a0 He begins to change us.\u00a0 Doesn\u2019t He?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 I had been trying so hard to earn my salvation.\u00a0 Then, I learned, \u201cIt has already been earned by Jesus.\u201d\u00a0 My heart just melted before that.\u00a0 Then, to realize that the Gospel would keep growing in my heart\u2014not only has the Gospel saved me\u2014but what Jesus did for me on the cross\u2014every day is sanctifying me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 What would you say to the person who is listening right now, who is going, \u201cSusan, that\u2019s me, I thought I had to earn my way.\u00a0 You are telling me that Jesus Christ lived that perfect life on my behalf and then died on a cross to pay the penalty for my sins, was buried, and then was raised from the dead on the third day, and offers that same work of grace in my heart.\u201d\u00a0 How can that person receive that gift?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong>\u00a0 Pray and ask Him.\u00a0 Just go before Him and say, \u201cLord, I believe.\u00a0 I believe.\u00a0 I give my life to You.\u00a0 Please come into my life and change me and make me Your own.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, go to His Word.\u00a0 Start reading His Word, and find a Bible-preaching church, and begin to grow in the grace and knowledge of Jesus.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 It may be, there are folks listening who are like you were.\u00a0 They grew up in the church.\u00a0 They have been thinking their whole lives that, \u201cIf I will just do what the Bible says to do, that somehow that will earn God\u2019s favor.\u201d\u00a0 As they hear you describe your own story, they go, \u201cI need to think differently about this.\u00a0 I need to turn from the way I have been thinking and turn to Christ and follow Him.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you are listening and that\u2019s the situation with you, we have got a book we would love to send you.\u00a0 It is a book called <em>Pursuing God<\/em> that lays out real clearly the difference between trying to perform and earn God\u2019s favor and, instead, trusting in Christ and giving your life to Him, and receiving God\u2019s grace and forgiveness, and the experience of transformation that comes with it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I would encourage people to call us or go online and get a copy of that book and really find out what occurs when you become born again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs I said on an earlier broadcast, every woman needs a mentor; and every woman needs to be a mentor.\u00a0 I think, Susan, what you have done in all of these workbooks and mentoring manuals that you have put together here is\u2014you have made it so easy for women to make an impact in other women\u2019s lives.\u00a0 In the process, their own lives are going to be changed because, as they are poured out, fresh water is poured into them, as well.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just appreciate you and am grateful to God for you, Susan.\u00a0 You are a true gift to the body of Christ.\u00a0 I just appreciate you joining us again here on<em> FamilyLife Today.<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan<\/strong>:\u00a0 Thank you very much.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob<\/strong>:\u00a0 You know, I don\u2019t know how many of our listeners realize this, but one of the things we have tried to do here at Family Life is make it as easy as possible for someone to get engaged in mentoring, whether it\u2019s younger men or younger women.\u00a0 We have a team that is working to help equip online mentors and those who would like to be mentors in a one-on-one face-to-face kind of a situation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere is a training curriculum we put together; it's something we are pretty excited about.\u00a0 You can find out more about how you can be an online mentor with folks who are writing to us, looking for help; how you can help engage with those folks; or how you can be better trained to be a mentor one-on-one.\u00a0 Go to FamilyLifeToday.com for more information about how you can engage as a mentor.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, we are trying to create resources, much like what you have done, Susan.\u00a0 You have put these workbooks together for older women to engage with young teens around what it means to be a godly woman.\u00a0 We also have a video curriculum we put together called <em>Life Ready Woman,<\/em> with Shaunti Feldhahn, a woman can bring to her church, or to her women\u2019s Bible study, or whatever group she is a part of.\u00a0 They can all go through the video training together and begin to understand what it means to be a woman in the 21<sup>st<\/sup> Century and, yet, to hold to biblical convictions as you live that out.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, there is information online about all of the resources that are available.\u00a0 Go to FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 Find out more about becoming a mentor; find out about the curriculum that Susan has developed for older women to use with young teens; find out about the <em>Life Ready Woman<\/em> curriculum and other resources we have available.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, the website is FamilyLifeToday.com; or call us toll free at 1-800-FLTODAY (1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in Family, \u201cL\u201d as in Life, and then the word TODAY).\u00a0 When you get in touch, we will answer any question you have about these resources or make arrangements to have the ones you need sent to you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, I just have to mention, how encouraged we have been over the last several days to hear from a number of regular listeners who have been kind of \u201chiding out,\u201d you have been anonymous while you have been listeners.\u00a0 We have had a number of you who have called or who have gotten in touch with us online and have said, \u201cWe are out here.\u00a0 We are listening.\u00a0 We like <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em>It is helping.\u00a0 We have just never picked up the phone or gone online and made a donation to help support the ministry, and it\u2019s time to do that.\u201d\u00a0 It\u2019s been fun to watch the little thermometer that we have on our website continue to grow as we hope to get to 2000 first-time listeners who get in touch with us here during the month of August.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTo encourage you to do that, we are making available a CD series featuring six messages from the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>\u00ae marriage getaway.\u00a0 Dennis Rainey and I spoke at one of these getaways not long ago.\u00a0 These messages are available on audio CD.\u00a0 We will send you this CD sampler from the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway when you make a donation to support <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> during the month of August.\u00a0 Again, if you are a first-time donor, that will show up on that thermometer.\u00a0 We appreciate your getting in touch with us.\u00a0 It is always nice to hear from folks who have been listening for a while but have just never made the connection.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you make your donation online at FamilyLifeToday.com and you would like to receive that CD sampler, you need to type the word \u201cSAMPLER\u201d into the key code box on the online donation form.\u00a0 If you make a donation over the phone, after you make the donation, just mention that you would like the CDs from the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway; and we will get those sent to you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, we want to say, \u201cThanks,\u201d in advance for whatever you are able to do in support of the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we hope you will be here as we are going to be joined by Pastor John Bisagno, who has some wise counsel for married couples.\u00a0 We are going to talk about what real love looks like in a marriage relationship.\u00a0 I hope you can be here for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 2011 FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["21.51M"],"filesize_raw":["22549859"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-302338.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-302338.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: 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is your neighbor?","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-08-10.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Unless we have this eternal perspective, we will become settlers and we will see this world as all there is.\u00a0 It is so important to have this eternal perspective where we see that we are moving towards something grand and glorious and that this world will never give us what will be ours when Jesus comes back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Wednesday, August 10<sup>th<\/sup>.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife\u00ae, Dennis Rainey; and I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We are going to talk today about what older women can do to cast an eternal vision for younger women, about what it means to be a godly woman.\u00a0 Stay tuned.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us.\u00a0 I was with a friend of mine, not long ago, and we were talking about fruitfulness in life.\u00a0 He said, \u201cYou know, I saw a study recently that said the most fruitful decade in a person\u2019s life\u201d\u2014\u00a0 What decade would you think would be the most fruitful decade in a person\u2019s life?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Number five or number six.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>He said that the 60s are the most fruitful decade in most people\u2019s lives.\u00a0 I thought, \u201cReally?\u00a0 The 60s?\u201d\u00a0 Then he said, \u201cYou know what number two is?\u201d\u00a0 I thought, \u201cWell yes; I would think it was the 50s.\u201d\u00a0 He said, \u201cNo, it\u2019s the 70s.\u201d\u00a0 He said, \u201c50s are next.\u201d\u00a0 I thought, \u201cWell, I still have some room ahead.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut ,I think our guest today is demonstrating fruitfulness does not end at the social\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis<\/strong>:\u00a0 You better be careful, Bob.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Does not end at the time Social Security kicks in.\u00a0 How does that sound?\u00a0 When you get your AARP card, that\u2019s not when fruitfulness ends.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 Susan Hunt joins us.\u00a0 Susan, I want to welcome you back to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Thank you very much.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Susan already mentioned her age on an earlier broadcast, and Bob was tiptoeing around that.\u00a0 I thought, \u201cBob, you are not going to say her age!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You are not embarrassed of your age, are you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I am very proud of it; I am 72.\u00a0 I just thank the Lord every day.\u00a0 It is a wonderful decade.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>And look at how fruitful your life has been in the last decade, in this decade.\u00a0 I mean, God is continuing to work through you to inspire women to embrace His design for womanhood.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, in the Scriptures, Anna was 84 when Mary went into the temple, and Anna blessed Mary.\u00a0 Do you remember that wonderful story?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I do, yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>And I find great encouragement for that.\u00a0 She was still fresh and green as the Psalmist said, at 84. So, let\u2019s hope.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You build your mentoring of younger women around the theme of legacy.\u00a0 You talk about the different relationships that a woman has in her lifetime\u2014that of being a daughter and expressing gratitude, being a sister and leaving a legacy of unity, (now that\u2019s real interesting one with sibling rivalry being what it is in families).\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen you talk about the theme of being a neighbor.\u00a0 And you know, honestly Susan, I think the idea of being a good neighbor today has been lost in this culture.\u00a0 We have got far too many fences and far too many entertainment trinkets in our homes.\u00a0 We just kind of \u201cwall up and hole up,\u201d and we don\u2019t reach out next door to our neighbors.\u00a0 My mom demonstrated this legacy of being a great neighbor.\u00a0 You really believe that\u2019s important, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I really think it is, even within our churches.\u00a0 So often, we are withdrawn and ingrown.\u00a0 The point of these different relationships is:\u00a0 With sister, we want the girls to understand our spiritual sisterhood in Christ and that that relationship\u2014our relationship with other Christians\u2014is going to be a bit different than our relationships with who we define as the \u201cneighbors.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe neighbors go back to the question that was asked of Jesus, \u201cWho is my neighbor?\u201d\u00a0 He went on to tell the parable of the Good Samaritan.\u00a0 So here, we are helping girls to see that we have relationships with Christians, and within our families, that go to one level; but that our reactions to those who are not Christians is going to be different.\u00a0 It is going to be a much more one-sided relationship, which is what the Gospel is.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong><strong>I<\/strong>n fact, you defined the sister relationship as pursuing the grace of unity\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Unity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>but in the neighbor relationship, we are not pursuing unity, necessarily.\u00a0 Right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Right, but rather it is mercy.\u00a0 This is an important discussion with our teen girls because many of them have friends who are not Christians.\u00a0 They are bit confused about their responses in those relationships.\u00a0 What we try to help them to see is that their response should be one of mercy, but that there is a level to which they cannot go with those relationships.\u00a0 Of course, then this also carries over into relationships with boys\u2014that they need to understand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>In fact, to pursue unity with your neighbor may be spiritually counterproductive.\u00a0 It may be spiritually destructive in your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Absolutely.\u00a0 This helps them to begin to get that distinction\u2014that we are not saying to them, \u201cDo not have non-Christian friends,\u201d but, \u201cYou have got to always be on guard that those friends are not influencing you, but you influencing those friends with mercy.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>What I hear you challenging and empowering women to do with their neighbors is to reach out in to their brokenness and where they are in need\u2014not of being judged\u2014but in need of mercy and looking at them through the eyes of Christ, in need of forgiveness and in need of knowing Him.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think it so easy with our neighbors to go, \u201cCan you believe what our neighbors have done here?\u00a0 You know, they are divorced.\u201d\u00a0 It is easy for the Christian community to really be judgmental.\u00a0 You are calling women to look at these neighbors and extend the Gospel of Jesus Christ to them in a very real way.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 The only reason I am a sister and a daughter, within God\u2019s family, is because of God\u2019s grace.\u00a0 So, I must look at the neighbors with great mercy, which hopefully will help our young girls and our women to look at their own neighbors in their neighborhoods, who are not Christians, with greater mercy.\u00a0 To even look beyond to community needs, where we can go out and be serving in the homeless shelters or the crisis pregnancy centers.\u00a0 We go with the mercy of Christ.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>One of the other relationships that you help women embrace is the relationship of being a wife.\u00a0 Again, some of the young women that you are talking to, they are not wives yet.\u00a0 They may grow up and have the gift of singleness.\u00a0 How are they to understand this wife relationship if they are not married?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>The grace that we are pointing them to is that of oneness.\u00a0 What we try to help the young women to see is that we must learn to glorify God in every relationship.\u00a0 We must learn to be life-givers in every relationship before marriage.\u00a0 Now, if God gives you marriage and you have learned to be a life-giver, then you bring that into the marriage.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLast summer, I was discipling a young college woman.\u00a0 She was on the West Coast; I was on the East Coast.\u00a0 We were doing this via e-mail, just to see how it would work.\u00a0 We never talked; we just emailed back and forth, put all of our thoughts into writing.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of her questions to me was, \u201cHow do I learn to be a life-giver when I don\u2019t even have a boyfriend?\u201d\u00a0 My answer was, \u201cNow is the time to learn to be a life-giver because if you wait until after marriage, you are going to have a lot to undo.\u201d\u00a0 So, you learn to be a life-giver; and then you bring all of those relational skills into the marriage.\u00a0 Whether a woman is married or not, we still need to learn that wonderful relational perspective of being life-givers. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Susan, whenever you think of the description of a godly woman, everybody always runs to Proverbs 31; but the rest of the Proverbs really speak on a number of occasions, challenging woman to be those life-givers.\u00a0 One of them is talking about how death and life are in the power of the tongue.\u00a0 A woman\u2019s words can either bring life or death to those people around her.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That is so descriptive, isn\u2019t it?\u00a0 It's just amazing.\u00a0 The power of words is incredible.\u00a0 One of the things that we talk about in the material is the ministry of encouragement.\u00a0 How do we learn to be encouragers with our words and with our actions?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat is such an important thing for women to learn is, \u201cHow do we learn to become women whose husbands can say, \u2018My heart is safe with her.\u2019?\u201d\u00a0 I will ask my husband sometimes, \u201cIs your heart safe with me?\u201d\u00a0 I encourage young women, \u201cThink about it.\u00a0 Is your husband\u2019s heart safe with you or does he fear your criticism, your disappointment, your expectations that he just cannot live up to, he can never get it right?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAll of those intangible ways are ways that we bring support into a marriage.\u00a0 It really begins with our own heart.\u00a0 Our husbands can read us.\u00a0 They can see if we are saying one thing, but on the inside, we are disappointed with them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Susan, as you were talking about a wife being a safe woman\u2014a safe wife to confide in and who comes alongside her husband\u2014that resonated with me.\u00a0 I think there are a lot of women who kind of eased forward on the edges of their seat.\u00a0 Can you share an illustration of what that looks like when a wife is being that safe woman for her husband?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan<\/strong>:\u00a0 It is something that has to grow over years.\u00a0 It is not just a one-time event, but I will give you a one-time illustration that I think will help us to see what it means.\u00a0 Many of our young men today are in very stressful situations in their jobs, with all of the unemployment.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur son-in-law who is such a wonderful godly man has been able to keep his job; but in so doing, his responsibilities have increased.\u00a0 He has probably tripled in his responsibilities.\u00a0 So, recently, he was away.\u00a0 The little eight-year-old began crying, \u201cI want my daddy.\u00a0 I want to see my daddy.\u00a0 I want to call my daddy.\u201d\u00a0 Then, the six-year-old pitched in.\u00a0 We women can really feed off each other; and so she began crying, same thing.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur daughter sat them both down and said, \u201cYour daddy has told you that you can call him anytime.\u00a0 The reason your daddy is away is because he is providing for us so that I can be at home with you.\u00a0 Now, you can call your daddy; but you are not going to call him, crying, because it would make him sad.\u00a0 It would make him feel guilty, and we are not going to do that to him.\u00a0 When you can call him and encourage him, and when you can call him and be happy, you can call.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe eight-year-old, Maggie, said, \u201cOhhh (sniffling). Ohhh (sniffling). Okay, I will wait until tomorrow;\u201d (laughter)\u00a0 and she did.\u00a0 Well, our daughter called me the next day and said, \u201cMom, did I do the right thing?\u201d\u00a0 I said, \u201cAbsolutely.\u00a0\u00a0 You are teaching those girls to be life-givers, not to make their dad feel guilty.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThose are the sorts of things that we need to do to help our husbands.\u00a0 We don\u2019t need to take out our frustrations and to make them feel that they are not doing their part.\u00a0 So often, young women have unrealistic expectations of their husbands; and we need to be encouragers.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, not only did your daughter train her daughters in the right direction; but I am thinking of the wives who call a husband who is away and go, \u201cCan't you come home?\u00a0 Do you have to go on that trip again?\u201d\u00a0 Instead of being the life-giver, instead of being a safe place where he can go and feel supported, she is eroding their relationship by doing that.\u00a0 Isn\u2019t she?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Absolutely.\u00a0 Then, when he does come in, so often she throws up her hands and says, \u201cI am done!\u00a0 You take over now,\u201d and he is exhausted.\u00a0 We need to understand that providing for a family is such a godly, sacrificial manly-thing.\u00a0 When men do that, we need to see it as a spiritual service; and we need to appreciate it.\u00a0 I am afraid, too often, women don\u2019t.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>It seems like some people are spontaneous or natural with their affirming words.\u00a0 They are just people who are always finding the good in others and saying it.\u00a0 Seems like other people\u2014it's just not natural\u2014and they have to do it, almost by a discipline.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, you seem like one of those natural kinds to me.\u00a0 I am guessing that around your house, you were just kind of naturally always looking for things you could affirm with Gene or with the kids.\u00a0 Is that the case, or did you have to train yourself to use your words to affirm?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Before I was a Christian, I was such a critical, negative person.\u00a0 I did have to learn.\u00a0 I had to begin to understand the power of words.\u00a0 I had to pray a lot; I had to repent a lot.\u00a0 God just changes our hearts.\u00a0 He really does!\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJust to say words with our mouths that we are not experiencing in our hearts, it's just flat and empty.\u00a0 All I can do is say, \u201cThank you, Jesus, that You changed my heart.\u00a0 You gave me such a love for You\u2014that You put the words in my heart.\u201d\u00a0 He really does.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I just have to\u2014I can\u2019t imagine a critical, hardhearted Susan Hunt.\u00a0 When did you come to faith?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I was 22.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>What was it?\u00a0 I mean, just tell the story of how God did a transforming work in your heart and the change that took place.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I grew up in the church, very religious and very proud; but a time came when I was so empty, right after college, that I did not know what to do.\u00a0 I had to do something religious, and so I went to seminary to study Christian education.\u00a0 In a seminary class, I heard the Gospel.\u00a0 I had thought up to that time that I had to earn my salvation, \u201cBe good enough and you go to heaven.\u00a0 If you are not good enough, you don\u2019t go to heaven.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere, I heard the Gospel.\u00a0 My ears were opened to the Gospel for the first time.\u00a0 Everything I had learned growing up as a child, all the Bible verses I had learned, suddenly came alive, suddenly made sense.\u00a0 God intervened in my heart and turned me to Himself.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>What did you hear that was different than, \u201cYou have got to perform this way in order to please God?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I am not sure that there was anything different or whether my ears were just stopped and the Lord did not open them.\u00a0 Whatever is the case, at first I was pretty bitter because I thought, \u201cWhy did no one ever tell me this before?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen I began to understand the sovereignty of God; and I thought, \u201cThey probably did.\u201d\u00a0 What all of that did in me was to create such a passion to be sure that no children or youth in our churches ever went all the way through and they did not hear the Gospel.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>The Gospel is that, \u201cPerforming your way into God\u2019s presence never works,\u201d but, \u201cthat God Himself has done what we need to:\u00a0 He has been perfectly obedient; He has kept all of the Law.\u00a0 When we trust Him, when we follow Him, when we surrender our lives and become His slaves, He has accomplished what we could never accomplish on our own.\u201d\u00a0 That\u2019s where the transformed life comes, as we yield and surrender to him.\u00a0 He begins to change us.\u00a0 Doesn\u2019t He?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 I had been trying so hard to earn my salvation.\u00a0 Then, I learned, \u201cIt has already been earned by Jesus.\u201d\u00a0 My heart just melted before that.\u00a0 Then, to realize that the Gospel would keep growing in my heart\u2014not only has the Gospel saved me\u2014but what Jesus did for me on the cross\u2014every day is sanctifying me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 What would you say to the person who is listening right now, who is going, \u201cSusan, that\u2019s me, I thought I had to earn my way.\u00a0 You are telling me that Jesus Christ lived that perfect life on my behalf and then died on a cross to pay the penalty for my sins, was buried, and then was raised from the dead on the third day, and offers that same work of grace in my heart.\u201d\u00a0 How can that person receive that gift?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan:<\/strong>\u00a0 Pray and ask Him.\u00a0 Just go before Him and say, \u201cLord, I believe.\u00a0 I believe.\u00a0 I give my life to You.\u00a0 Please come into my life and change me and make me Your own.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, go to His Word.\u00a0 Start reading His Word, and find a Bible-preaching church, and begin to grow in the grace and knowledge of Jesus.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 It may be, there are folks listening who are like you were.\u00a0 They grew up in the church.\u00a0 They have been thinking their whole lives that, \u201cIf I will just do what the Bible says to do, that somehow that will earn God\u2019s favor.\u201d\u00a0 As they hear you describe your own story, they go, \u201cI need to think differently about this.\u00a0 I need to turn from the way I have been thinking and turn to Christ and follow Him.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you are listening and that\u2019s the situation with you, we have got a book we would love to send you.\u00a0 It is a book called <em>Pursuing God<\/em> that lays out real clearly the difference between trying to perform and earn God\u2019s favor and, instead, trusting in Christ and giving your life to Him, and receiving God\u2019s grace and forgiveness, and the experience of transformation that comes with it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I would encourage people to call us or go online and get a copy of that book and really find out what occurs when you become born again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs I said on an earlier broadcast, every woman needs a mentor; and every woman needs to be a mentor.\u00a0 I think, Susan, what you have done in all of these workbooks and mentoring manuals that you have put together here is\u2014you have made it so easy for women to make an impact in other women\u2019s lives.\u00a0 In the process, their own lives are going to be changed because, as they are poured out, fresh water is poured into them, as well.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just appreciate you and am grateful to God for you, Susan.\u00a0 You are a true gift to the body of Christ.\u00a0 I just appreciate you joining us again here on<em> FamilyLife Today.<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Susan<\/strong>:\u00a0 Thank you very much.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob<\/strong>:\u00a0 You know, I don\u2019t know how many of our listeners realize this, but one of the things we have tried to do here at Family Life is make it as easy as possible for someone to get engaged in mentoring, whether it\u2019s younger men or younger women.\u00a0 We have a team that is working to help equip online mentors and those who would like to be mentors in a one-on-one face-to-face kind of a situation. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere is a training curriculum we put together; it's something we are pretty excited about.\u00a0 You can find out more about how you can be an online mentor with folks who are writing to us, looking for help; how you can help engage with those folks; or how you can be better trained to be a mentor one-on-one.\u00a0 Go to FamilyLifeToday.com for more information about how you can engage as a mentor.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, we are trying to create resources, much like what you have done, Susan.\u00a0 You have put these workbooks together for older women to engage with young teens around what it means to be a godly woman.\u00a0 We also have a video curriculum we put together called <em>Life Ready Woman,<\/em> with Shaunti Feldhahn, a woman can bring to her church, or to her women\u2019s Bible study, or whatever group she is a part of.\u00a0 They can all go through the video training together and begin to understand what it means to be a woman in the 21<sup>st<\/sup> Century and, yet, to hold to biblical convictions as you live that out.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, there is information online about all of the resources that are available.\u00a0 Go to FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 Find out more about becoming a mentor; find out about the curriculum that Susan has developed for older women to use with young teens; find out about the <em>Life Ready Woman<\/em> curriculum and other resources we have available.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, the website is FamilyLifeToday.com; or call us toll free at 1-800-FLTODAY (1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in Family, \u201cL\u201d as in Life, and then the word TODAY).\u00a0 When you get in touch, we will answer any question you have about these resources or make arrangements to have the ones you need sent to you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, I just have to mention, how encouraged we have been over the last several days to hear from a number of regular listeners who have been kind of \u201chiding out,\u201d you have been anonymous while you have been listeners.\u00a0 We have had a number of you who have called or who have gotten in touch with us online and have said, \u201cWe are out here.\u00a0 We are listening.\u00a0 We like <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em>It is helping.\u00a0 We have just never picked up the phone or gone online and made a donation to help support the ministry, and it\u2019s time to do that.\u201d\u00a0 It\u2019s been fun to watch the little thermometer that we have on our website continue to grow as we hope to get to 2000 first-time listeners who get in touch with us here during the month of August.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTo encourage you to do that, we are making available a CD series featuring six messages from the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>\u00ae marriage getaway.\u00a0 Dennis Rainey and I spoke at one of these getaways not long ago.\u00a0 These messages are available on audio CD.\u00a0 We will send you this CD sampler from the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway when you make a donation to support <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> during the month of August.\u00a0 Again, if you are a first-time donor, that will show up on that thermometer.\u00a0 We appreciate your getting in touch with us.\u00a0 It is always nice to hear from folks who have been listening for a while but have just never made the connection.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you make your donation online at FamilyLifeToday.com and you would like to receive that CD sampler, you need to type the word \u201cSAMPLER\u201d into the key code box on the online donation form.\u00a0 If you make a donation over the phone, after you make the donation, just mention that you would like the CDs from the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway; and we will get those sent to you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, we want to say, \u201cThanks,\u201d in advance for whatever you are able to do in support of the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we hope you will be here as we are going to be joined by Pastor John Bisagno, who has some wise counsel for married couples.\u00a0 We are going to talk about what real love looks like in a marriage relationship.\u00a0 I hope you can be here for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 2011 FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/302338","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=302338"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=302338"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=302338"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=302338"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=302338"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=302338"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=302338"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}