{"id":302281,"date":"2011-05-27T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2011-05-27T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/words-that-reveal-heal-and-live\/"},"modified":"2011-05-27T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2011-05-27T15:00:00","slug":"words-that-reveal-heal-and-live","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/words-that-reveal-heal-and-live\/","title":{"rendered":"Words That Reveal, Heal and Live"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Words, either good or bad, can have a lasting impact.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-05-27.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"21.83M","filesize_raw":"22890611","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2809],"tags":[4527,2918],"podcast_series":[7805],"cwp_profile":[9234],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302281","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-commitment","tag-communication","tag-conflict","podcast_series-a-way-with-words","cwp_profile-christen-ditchfield","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302281\/words-that-reveal-heal-and-live","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302281\/words-that-reveal-heal-and-live","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"k5LAAOG6Gk\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/words-that-reveal-heal-and-live\/\">Words That Reveal, Heal and Live<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/words-that-reveal-heal-and-live\/embed\/#?secret=k5LAAOG6Gk\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Words That Reveal, Heal and Live&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"k5LAAOG6Gk\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-05-27.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-05-27.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 The Bible says \u201cOut of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.\u201d\u00a0 So what\u2019s the abundance of your heart like today?\u00a0 Here is Christin Ditchfield.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 We need to be counting our blessings.\u00a0 You know that old song; it\u2019s trite, but it\u2019s true.\u00a0 Counting our blessings \u2013 I\u2019ve learned that in my own life and my own heart.\u00a0 If I\u2019m constantly complaining and whining and miserable, I make myself more miserable, and I distance myself from God.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut if I speak words that are words of gratitude, words of trust and faith, then I build up my own faith and I build up my own relationship with the Lord, because I\u2019m focused on him and not on the problems.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLifeToday<\/em> for Friday, May 27<sup>th<\/sup>.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 Have you been thinking about things that are true and honorable and just and pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, worthy of praise?\u00a0 Then there ought to be edifying words coming out of your mouth.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us.\u00a0 I remember a friend of mine one time.\u00a0 We were talking about prayer, and this friend said, \u201cAlmost every time I pray I recite a line from, I think it\u2019s Psalm 19: \u2018Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be \u2013\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis and Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 -- acceptable in your sight, O God \u2013\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 -- my rock and my redeemer.\u2018\u201d You know that verse, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You prayed it a few times yourself?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I have, and you know, it is from our hearts that ultimately words do flow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 \u201cOut of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh,\u201d I think the old King James says.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 No doubt about it.\u00a0 We have a guest with us, Christin Ditchfield, who joins us again on <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em>\u00a0 Christin, welcome back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 It\u2019s great to be with you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 She\u2019s written a book called <em>A Way With Words.<\/em>\u00a0 She\u2019s also written fifty other books.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 So you have a way with words, I guess, if you\u2019ve written fifty books.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 I guess I do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 She has a way with written words and spoken words; she has a daily radio program called <em>Take it to Heart.<\/em>\u00a0 Really, we\u2019re talking about the power of words in people\u2019s lives.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYour grandmother actually used this principle in your life in a powerful way.\u00a0 In fact, you write about how some of her words brought life to you.\u00a0 Share that with our listeners.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, I remember when I was a teenager I had big glasses and lots of freckles and curly red hair, and I was awkward and unathletic, and socially backward.\u00a0 My parents were Christians and they wouldn\u2019t let me watch this on TV or listen to that on the radio.\u00a0 So when I went to school I didn\u2019t know what any of the other kids were talking about.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was horrifically shy; I was terrified of having to make conversation with people I didn\u2019t know, to the point of tears and hysterics just of the thought of walking into a room full of strangers.\u00a0 I had this great fear and this shyness, and yet at the same time I was beginning to fall in love with Jesus and beginning to be excited about what he was doing in my heart and in my life and wanting to share that with others.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd yet I just couldn\u2019t see how it could be.\u00a0 I remember my grandmother calling me over one day, and just putting her arm around me and saying, \u201cYou know, Christin, whenever I pray for you, I just see you speaking to thousands and thousands of people.\u00a0 I know God has a call on your life.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can\u2019t even tell you what that meant to me as a shy, awkward, socially backward teenager, trying so desperately to fit in and failing miserably, and thinking, you know, \u201cWhat hope is there for me?\u00a0 Where will my life go?\u00a0 What will I do? Who will I be?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Is there any purpose for my life?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Those are years of tremendous confusion, but she understood that and spoke words that brought encouragement and direction to your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s the thing.\u00a0 You know, she not only prayed for me and had that experience herself, but she shared it with me.\u00a0 She took the time to tell me what she was praying and what she was feeling, and to speak those words of encouragement into my life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think about those words now, and I am so grateful.\u00a0 I think she was very wounded by words when she was younger, and I think that caused her to have a great sensitivity in her heart for others, and a desire to be an encourager, to do the opposite of what had been done to her, and to speak words of life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m so grateful for that, and for the other men and women that God has put in my life who have spoken the right word at the right moment.\u00a0 You never know when one little word that you say, one word of encouragement, one compliment, one piece of really good advice might change the course of someone\u2019s life, and change their life for eternity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 How many years ago was it that your grandmother would have said something like that to you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, let me figure out how old I am now.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt was probably about 25 years ago.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And it still brings an emotion back to think about it, doesn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 It does. To think about that hurt and that pain that I was going through as a teenager \u2013 oh, how many of us had difficult teen years, and yet to think of how that touched my life, the hope that it gave me.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd now, that is what I do.\u00a0 I travel all over the country and I speak to thousands and thousands of people, and every time I walk up on that platform, you know, I pause for a moment and thank God for what he has done and for the amazing miracle in my life, and for my grandmother\u2019s prayers and for her words of encouragement.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, what you\u2019re talking about here applies to everybody, but I do think grandmothers and grandfathers have power that they don\u2019t recognize in the lives of their grandchildren, just to intentionally affirm and to speak.\u00a0 You have 17 grandchildren, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Has it dawned on you that you\u2019ve got power and that Barbara has power to give hope and to encourage these kids who are growing up?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Oh, yes.\u00a0 I won\u2019t tell which child I did this with, but one of them was struggling with his or her writing of the alphabet, okay?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I told the mom, I said, \u201cYou tell this particular grandchild that Papa will give him a buck for every page of the alphabet in capital letters and in lower case letters that he does where it passes Papa\u2019s test.\u201d\u00a0 So I ended up getting a complete list of the alphabet, all the pages, and I only paid this child twenty bucks.\u00a0 There were a few of the letters that weren\u2019t \u2013\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Didn\u2019t pass muster.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, it was my statement to him as a grandson, I\u2019m tipping off at least fifty percent of my grandkids at this point, it was my statement to him that I believed in him and that I thought that he could do it.\u00a0 I just wanted to motivate him to be able to do that, and encourage him in the process and have a little reward.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou don\u2019t have to be a teenager to go through tough times.\u00a0 Kids who may not fit well with school, and just don\u2019t \u2013 books aren\u2019t their deal.\u00a0 Maybe athletics is their deal and they\u2019re struggling with education at that point, and a word fitly spoken \u2013 what is that Proverb? \u2013 is like an apple of gold.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I was thinking, Bob, as Christin was talking there, how the emails you and I get from listeners, the letters we get \u2013\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 How encouraging that is.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It really is.\u00a0 In fact, listeners don\u2019t know this, but I\u2019ve saved a bunch of their emails and letters over the years.\u00a0 In fact, this is going to be a real challenge for my children and grandchildren some day.\u00a0 They\u2019re going to have some boxes \u2013\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tto go through, because there are words that are written that we write to other people and we have no idea when that person receives that letter what their day has been like.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019ve got this manila envelope that\u2019s up above the dryer in \u2013 and I don\u2019t know why it\u2019s up above the dryer \u2013 but in the laundry room, there are some shelves there, and on the top shelf there is a manila envelope.\u00a0 If you were to pull it down, you\u2019d find a bunch of little notes that have been written over the last several years, where somebody will write a note and I\u2019ll go, \u201cI\u2019m not throwing that one away.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yeah, right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m keeping it.\u201d\u00a0 It goes in the manila envelope, and it\u2019s not like I get it down all the time and read through it \u2013\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 But there was a time recently where I just went to the envelope and pulled out a letter that I remembered and reread it, and it blows a fresh wind of hope into your sails when that happens.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\u00a0 Words have power, and they have the power to build and to inspire and to encourage and to heal the wounds of the past.\u00a0 We can give godly counsel and encouragement and advice.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m thankful I have four nephews and having been a teacher, education is really important, and I\u2019ve enjoyed working with them in some of their school work and things.\u00a0 But I\u2019m also enjoying sharing with them a little bit of my faith journey, how \u201cwhen I was your brother\u2019s age,\u201d or \u201cwhen I was your age, that\u2019s when I first fell in love with Jesus.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Let me tell you, I took one of them to the Christian book store a couple weeks ago and I helped him pick out a new Bible.\u00a0 Now that he\u2019s getting older, he needs one with not so many pictures.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yeah, right.\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 But I didn\u2019t just buy him the Bible.\u00a0 Thankfully the Lord encouraged me, and I sat there and I shared with him when I first began to fall in love with the Scriptures, and how I first began to read, and what exactly I did, and how I kept a prayer journal, and began to teach him that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s such an opportunity to invest in the lives of our children, our grandchildren, our nieces and nephews, the people that we come into contact with.\u00a0 A simple word, a few minutes, a story, and we can change their lives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Did you do that on the spur of the moment?\u00a0 Did it just come to you in the moment, or do you at the beginning of a day stop and think, \u201cOkay, where can I plant some encouraging words today?\u201d\u00a0 Or do you just let it happen?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s a good question.\u00a0 I think the best for me is when I do a little bit of both when I make the choice to be deliberate and to look for people that I can encourage, or to identify people that God has put in my life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, sometimes it\u2019s an interruption of our day.\u00a0 I\u2019ve got a to-do list a mile long, and I\u2019m sure you have one, too, but there are times when God puts it on your heart:\u00a0 set it down, pick up the phone, go for coffee, and speak into that person\u2019s life.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you see the tears well up, when you see that God is ministering to them, you know that it\u2019s worth it.\u00a0 Okay, the laundry can wait, but I\u2019ve just had a chance to be the voice of Jesus in their life and to speak his words of hope and comfort and healing.\u00a0 There are other times it is very spontaneous and spur-of-the-moment, but I think it starts with an overall awareness of the power of those words.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, one thing that you\u2019re modeling that we haven\u2019t heard that much of here on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is being a good aunt, you know?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Or a good uncle.\u00a0 I mean, truthfully, I look back on my experience of being an uncle, and I wouldn\u2019t give myself real high marks, and yet, really, I had no excuse because I had aunts and uncles that surrounded my life as a boy growing up.\u00a0 A lot of them teased me, not in a hurtful way, but in a teasing way to make me aware that I was loved --\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> -- and that I was an insider.\u00a0 I think we need to be doing more as aunts and uncles, because young people today need a chorus of voices speaking into them, turning them away from the culture, the world, their own selfishness, and calling them to what God wants them to be and do with their lives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\u00a0 I think sometimes we can fill the gap.\u00a0 Moms and Dads get tired and worn out and stressed out and frustrated and don\u2019t always have the patience to listen and interact, so that\u2019s where I see my role as an aunt and my friends.\u00a0 I had aunts that modeled that for me, to step in and be a voice in their lives, to take the time, sit and listen to those stories, and build something into their life.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEncourage them, and back up what Mom and Dad are saying, you know, so that it\u2019s not just Mom and Dad that say this, but a chorus of people, as you said, who are teaching them the truth of Scripture and giving them words of life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 We have a mutual friend, Dennis and I do, who from time to time, usually on a weekend, my cell phone will ring and I\u2019ll look and I\u2019ll smile, because it\u2019s this particular friend, and I know why he\u2019s calling.\u00a0 He\u2019ll call and he\u2019ll say, \u201cAre you preaching tomorrow?\u201d\u00a0 I\u2019ll say, \u201cYeah, I\u2019m preaching tomorrow.\u201d\u00a0 He\u2019ll say, \u201cWhat are you preaching on?\u201d and I\u2019ll tell him about the passage that I\u2019m going to be teaching on.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe\u2019ll say, \u201cWell, let me pray for you.\u00a0 I was just thinking about you, and know you\u2019re getting ready, and I want you to preach it, and let me just pray for you.\u201d\u00a0 He\u2019s a preacher, too, so we usually talk about what he\u2019s preaching on, and we share it back and forth.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd you know, it takes a moment, and I think, \u201cHow many guys is he doing this with?\u00a0 How many other people is he calling and doing this with?\u201d\u00a0 But it\u2019s one of those ways that he\u2019s marked me, just to know that when I get up and preach the next morning, to know that he has prayed for me, but that he cares about what I\u2019m getting ready to do.\u00a0 It makes a difference in how I preach.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 He\u2019s talking about somebody who\u2019s being intentional and about encouraging someone else.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And how infrequently do we do that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Exactly.\u00a0 Another way we use our words in a very, very powerful way, is by telling people what they need to hear.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Not what they want to hear.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 And that\u2019s tough.\u00a0 We walk a fine line.\u00a0 The Scripture talks about speaking the truth in love, and sometimes we\u2019re too quick to speak the truth, but not in love.\u00a0 But at the right time, being honest with someone, being truthful.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m thankful that God has put friends in my life who will listen while I rant and rave and vent out my frustration or my hurt or my anger, and then will point out to me that\u2019s not such a godly attitude.\u00a0 There\u2019s room for growth.\u00a0 I need to be patient.\u00a0 I need to be more understanding.\u00a0 You know we can do that for each other.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBeing a good sounding board is not agreeing with everything the person says, but is saying, \u201cI love you, and I understand, and I\u2019ll listen if you need to vent,\u201d but then at the right time and in the right moment, especially if we have a relationship with that person, we can speak into their lives and say, \u201cHere\u2019s what I see.\u00a0 Here\u2019s what I hear you saying.\u00a0 Is that what you mean to say?\u201d\u00a0 And give them the opportunity to grow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Sometimes there\u2019s the need to hear what a friend is going through, as I did earlier today, and then after he\u2019d shared what he was going through, instead of offering three points and a poem or a solution, I told my friend, \u201cI just have to tell you.\u00a0 I\u2019m really sad.\u00a0 It really makes me sad that you\u2019re going through what you\u2019re going through.\u00a0 That\u2019s just a hard thing.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have to tell you, that goes against my grain as a man, because men tend to want to fix things.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 We can certainly take a lot of this advice, at least I can, with my own wife, not trying to fix her problems, but making sure first and foremost I\u2019ve had compassion and understanding on her problems, and you use words to communicate that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 And you know you can use words to get what you need.\u00a0 In my relationship, I share with my parents what I\u2019m going through, and I\u2019m blessed to have them as godly counselors still in my life as an adult.\u00a0 I have learned to say to my dad, \u201cI just need to vent, and I need you to listen.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 In other words, \u201cDad, park it.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cDon\u2019t fix it.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cDon\u2019t try to fix it.\u201d\u00a0 I\u2019ll say that to my friends, or I\u2019ll ask them to tell me, \u201cWhat are you looking for?\u00a0 I can come up with solutions for you.\u00a0 I can help you brainstorm.\u00a0 But if that\u2019s not what you need, I don\u2019t want to rattle off a bunch of useless advice.\u00a0 Tell me what you need.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cIf you just want me to listen, I\u2019m here.\u00a0 If you need some encouragement, if you need some ideas, I\u2019ve got those too, Lord willing.\u201d\u00a0 Shoot up one of those little prayers, \u201cLord, help me.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut articulating what we need, and sharing with them, \u201cThis is where I am,\u201d and asking them for what we need, for a listening ear, or for godly advice.\u00a0 Sometimes I will come to my dad and say, \u201cI do not know what to do about this.\u00a0 What do you think?\u201d\u00a0 I\u2019m grateful for the godly counsel that he\u2019s given me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Christin, I think it\u2019s in the heart of a lot of wives and moms and women to want to be encouraging, to want to use the power that they have for good.\u00a0 Why is it so hard to do?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Oh, because we\u2019re human beings.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Because our knowledge and our understanding is imperfect, and because so many times we think we know what\u2019s best for other people, and we are intent on doing for them or helping them to what we think is best, and that\u2019s not necessarily God\u2019s best.\u00a0 We can\u2019t see their heart, and we can\u2019t know every detail of their circumstances, and sometimes the advice we give or the encouragement we give is so misguided.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo that\u2019s where it comes back to really asking God to show us.\u00a0 And each relationship is different; each child is different, our relationship with our spouse or our boss or our coworkers, each relationship is different, and we relate to one another differently.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThank goodness we don\u2019t have to get it all figured out.\u00a0 We have a source we can go to, and we can ask the Holy Spirit, moment by moment, day by day, \u201cGive me the words to say that will bring life to this situation.\u00a0 Give me the words that will be a blessing to this child.\u00a0 Help me to encourage my spouse in a way that they will hear it and that it will be a blessing to them and it will bring life to them.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Life has a way of knocking the props out from under us, and we can go through seasons where the seasons get a little long sometimes, and it\u2019s easy to kind of look back over what\u2019s been taking place, and to start whining, complaining, griping, and worse.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019re just in need, I think, sometimes, as James talks about, \u201clooking into the mirror\u201d of the Scriptures and doing a little self-examination, and take a look at our mouth as to what\u2019s coming out.\u00a0 Fortunately in my life I\u2019ve had some friends who have loved me enough to say, \u201cI really don\u2019t want to hear any more.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, they didn\u2019t say it that bluntly, --\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 -- but they recognized the rut I was in, and they loved me enough to jar me out of the rut.\u00a0 We can use our words to lovingly, compassionately let somebody know, \u201cWhy don\u2019t you use words that are praiseworthy?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think there is something within our own spirits, our own hearts, where we\u2019re prone to gripe and complain a lot, and to look at our circumstances and kind of go, \u201cYou know, it\u2019s a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day and I want to move to Australia.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 But we need to encourage one another to get out of those and words can be that crowbar to dislodge people.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right, and we can choose to speak words, make it a habit, make it a purposeful thing, to choose to speak words in our own lives, words of gratitude, words of appreciation.\u00a0 We need to be counting our blessings.\u00a0 You know that old song; it\u2019s trite but it\u2019s true -- counting our blessings and being grateful for the things that God has given us.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen we speak those words in our own lives \u2013 I\u2019ve learned that in my own life and my own heart \u2013 if I\u2019m constantly complaining and whining and miserable, I make myself more miserable, and I distance myself from God.\u00a0 But if I speak words that are words of gratitude, words of appreciation, words of thankfulness, words of trust and faith, then I build up my own faith and I build up my own relationship with the Lord, because I\u2019m focused on him and not on the problems.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 When our kids were little, and I\u2019ve asked our team to get this song cued up \u2013 you may remember it \u2013 we had the CD, I guess it was a cassette back then, of Steve Green singing scripture songs.\u00a0 One of the ones that we used to sing to one another around the house was the verse \u201cKeep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking guile.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe second time we\u2019d sing it we\u2019d grab our tongues.\u00a0 We\u2019d actually hold onto our tongue, because it was a good reminder:\u00a0 sometimes you need to hold your tongue.\u00a0 And we\u2019d walk around the house with our fingers on our tongue, singing (demonstrating) \u201ckeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere\u2019s so much in Scripture about the power of the tongue, about the power of words for good or for evil in relationships, and yet I think we take it way too lightly.\u00a0 You\u2019ve done a great job in this book of calling us back to the power that a woman has with her words, that all of us have with our words.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, and I just appreciate your writing it and being on <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em>\u00a0 I think, Christin, you have exhorted and implored many to watch the power of the tongue and to tame the tongue.\u00a0 Thanks for being on the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Thank you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And before we\u2019re done, we\u2019ll see if we can get Steve Green to lead us all in singing that song.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Do we have to hold our tongues?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 We\u2019ll see.\u00a0 We have copies of Christin\u2019s book in our FamilyLife Today Resource Center.\u00a0 It\u2019s called <em>A Way With Words.<\/em>\u00a0 Go online at FamilyLifeToday.com for more information, FamilyLifeToday.com, or call 1-800-FLTODAY to request a copy.\u00a0 That's 1-800 \u201cF\u201d as in Family, \u201cL\u201d as in Life, and then the word \u201cToday.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, I don\u2019t know what plans you have for the holiday weekend.\u00a0 Hope you and your family are able to get together, and I hope your job lets you have a little extra time this weekend to relax and enjoy the beginning of summer.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the things we look at here at FamilyLife with summer coming on is that over the next couple of months we will probably see a little bit of a decline in the donations that we receive from listeners.\u00a0 That\u2019s the case for many ministries like ours; a lot of churches face the same kind of thing.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd that\u2019s one of the reasons why we had some friends who, a little more than a month ago, came to us and said, \u201cLet\u2019s see if we can encourage listeners during May to help support the ministry, so that as you head into summer you\u2019ve got a little bit of a surplus to deal with.\u201d\u00a0 And they agreed that during the month of May they would match every donation we receive here at FamilyLife on a dollar-for-dollar basis, up to a total of $750,000.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve been working real hard this month to try to get the word out, make sure that everybody knows about this matching gift challenge.\u00a0 We\u2019re getting down to the wire, and that\u2019s why we\u2019re asking you if you can, today, go to our website, FamilyLifeToday.com, or call us toll-free at 1-800-FLTODAY, and do whatever you can do, make whatever kind of donation you can make, $10 or $20, $50 or $100, $500 or $1000, whatever you can do.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp us take full advantage of this matching gift opportunity.\u00a0 Next week is when we hit the matching gift deadline, so we need to hear from you as soon as possible.\u00a0 Again the website, FamilyLifeToday.com, or call toll-free at 1-800-FLTODAY, and we just want to say thanks in advance for whatever you are able to do in support of the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHope you have a great weekend, and to wrap things up today, here is Steve Green from the <em>Hide \u201cEm in Your Heart<\/em> series for kids.\u00a0 You can decide whether you want to grab your tongue or not. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 Have a great weekend.\u00a0 We will see you back Monday for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve Green:<\/strong>\u00a0 Now you may be able to tame a bucking bronco or a wildcat, but you just can\u2019t tame a tongue.\u00a0 If your tongue is always getting you into trouble, saying things that shouldn\u2019t be said, here\u2019s something you can do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Child:<\/strong>\u00a0 Psalm 34, verse 13:\u00a0 Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Music:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd your lips from speaking lies\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve Green:<\/strong>\u00a0 Now grab hold of your tongue while we sing it again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Music:<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd your lips from speaking lies\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Child:<\/strong>\u00a0 Can I let go of my tongue now?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMusic copyright:\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTitle:\u00a0Keep Your Tongue from Evil - Psalm 34:13\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tArtist: Steve Green\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAlbum:\u00a0Hide 'Em In Your Heart, Vol. 1 (p) 2003 Sparrow Kids\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/site\/c.dnJHKLNnFoG\/b.3782043\/k.384D\/Support_Us.htm\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 2011FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["21.83M"],"filesize_raw":["22890611"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-302281.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-302281.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f 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either good or bad, can have a lasting impact.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-05-27.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 The Bible says \u201cOut of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.\u201d\u00a0 So what\u2019s the abundance of your heart like today?\u00a0 Here is Christin Ditchfield.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 We need to be counting our blessings.\u00a0 You know that old song; it\u2019s trite, but it\u2019s true.\u00a0 Counting our blessings \u2013 I\u2019ve learned that in my own life and my own heart.\u00a0 If I\u2019m constantly complaining and whining and miserable, I make myself more miserable, and I distance myself from God.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut if I speak words that are words of gratitude, words of trust and faith, then I build up my own faith and I build up my own relationship with the Lord, because I\u2019m focused on him and not on the problems.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLifeToday<\/em> for Friday, May 27<sup>th<\/sup>.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 Have you been thinking about things that are true and honorable and just and pure, lovely, commendable, excellent, worthy of praise?\u00a0 Then there ought to be edifying words coming out of your mouth.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us.\u00a0 I remember a friend of mine one time.\u00a0 We were talking about prayer, and this friend said, \u201cAlmost every time I pray I recite a line from, I think it\u2019s Psalm 19: \u2018Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be \u2013\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis and Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 -- acceptable in your sight, O God \u2013\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 -- my rock and my redeemer.\u2018\u201d You know that verse, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You prayed it a few times yourself?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I have, and you know, it is from our hearts that ultimately words do flow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 \u201cOut of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh,\u201d I think the old King James says.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 No doubt about it.\u00a0 We have a guest with us, Christin Ditchfield, who joins us again on <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em>\u00a0 Christin, welcome back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 It\u2019s great to be with you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 She\u2019s written a book called <em>A Way With Words.<\/em>\u00a0 She\u2019s also written fifty other books.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 So you have a way with words, I guess, if you\u2019ve written fifty books.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 I guess I do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 She has a way with written words and spoken words; she has a daily radio program called <em>Take it to Heart.<\/em>\u00a0 Really, we\u2019re talking about the power of words in people\u2019s lives.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYour grandmother actually used this principle in your life in a powerful way.\u00a0 In fact, you write about how some of her words brought life to you.\u00a0 Share that with our listeners.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, I remember when I was a teenager I had big glasses and lots of freckles and curly red hair, and I was awkward and unathletic, and socially backward.\u00a0 My parents were Christians and they wouldn\u2019t let me watch this on TV or listen to that on the radio.\u00a0 So when I went to school I didn\u2019t know what any of the other kids were talking about.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was horrifically shy; I was terrified of having to make conversation with people I didn\u2019t know, to the point of tears and hysterics just of the thought of walking into a room full of strangers.\u00a0 I had this great fear and this shyness, and yet at the same time I was beginning to fall in love with Jesus and beginning to be excited about what he was doing in my heart and in my life and wanting to share that with others.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd yet I just couldn\u2019t see how it could be.\u00a0 I remember my grandmother calling me over one day, and just putting her arm around me and saying, \u201cYou know, Christin, whenever I pray for you, I just see you speaking to thousands and thousands of people.\u00a0 I know God has a call on your life.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can\u2019t even tell you what that meant to me as a shy, awkward, socially backward teenager, trying so desperately to fit in and failing miserably, and thinking, you know, \u201cWhat hope is there for me?\u00a0 Where will my life go?\u00a0 What will I do? Who will I be?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Is there any purpose for my life?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Those are years of tremendous confusion, but she understood that and spoke words that brought encouragement and direction to your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s the thing.\u00a0 You know, she not only prayed for me and had that experience herself, but she shared it with me.\u00a0 She took the time to tell me what she was praying and what she was feeling, and to speak those words of encouragement into my life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think about those words now, and I am so grateful.\u00a0 I think she was very wounded by words when she was younger, and I think that caused her to have a great sensitivity in her heart for others, and a desire to be an encourager, to do the opposite of what had been done to her, and to speak words of life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m so grateful for that, and for the other men and women that God has put in my life who have spoken the right word at the right moment.\u00a0 You never know when one little word that you say, one word of encouragement, one compliment, one piece of really good advice might change the course of someone\u2019s life, and change their life for eternity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 How many years ago was it that your grandmother would have said something like that to you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, let me figure out how old I am now.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt was probably about 25 years ago.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And it still brings an emotion back to think about it, doesn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 It does. To think about that hurt and that pain that I was going through as a teenager \u2013 oh, how many of us had difficult teen years, and yet to think of how that touched my life, the hope that it gave me.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd now, that is what I do.\u00a0 I travel all over the country and I speak to thousands and thousands of people, and every time I walk up on that platform, you know, I pause for a moment and thank God for what he has done and for the amazing miracle in my life, and for my grandmother\u2019s prayers and for her words of encouragement.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, what you\u2019re talking about here applies to everybody, but I do think grandmothers and grandfathers have power that they don\u2019t recognize in the lives of their grandchildren, just to intentionally affirm and to speak.\u00a0 You have 17 grandchildren, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Has it dawned on you that you\u2019ve got power and that Barbara has power to give hope and to encourage these kids who are growing up?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Oh, yes.\u00a0 I won\u2019t tell which child I did this with, but one of them was struggling with his or her writing of the alphabet, okay?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I told the mom, I said, \u201cYou tell this particular grandchild that Papa will give him a buck for every page of the alphabet in capital letters and in lower case letters that he does where it passes Papa\u2019s test.\u201d\u00a0 So I ended up getting a complete list of the alphabet, all the pages, and I only paid this child twenty bucks.\u00a0 There were a few of the letters that weren\u2019t \u2013\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Didn\u2019t pass muster.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, it was my statement to him as a grandson, I\u2019m tipping off at least fifty percent of my grandkids at this point, it was my statement to him that I believed in him and that I thought that he could do it.\u00a0 I just wanted to motivate him to be able to do that, and encourage him in the process and have a little reward.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou don\u2019t have to be a teenager to go through tough times.\u00a0 Kids who may not fit well with school, and just don\u2019t \u2013 books aren\u2019t their deal.\u00a0 Maybe athletics is their deal and they\u2019re struggling with education at that point, and a word fitly spoken \u2013 what is that Proverb? \u2013 is like an apple of gold.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I was thinking, Bob, as Christin was talking there, how the emails you and I get from listeners, the letters we get \u2013\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 How encouraging that is.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It really is.\u00a0 In fact, listeners don\u2019t know this, but I\u2019ve saved a bunch of their emails and letters over the years.\u00a0 In fact, this is going to be a real challenge for my children and grandchildren some day.\u00a0 They\u2019re going to have some boxes \u2013\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tto go through, because there are words that are written that we write to other people and we have no idea when that person receives that letter what their day has been like.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019ve got this manila envelope that\u2019s up above the dryer in \u2013 and I don\u2019t know why it\u2019s up above the dryer \u2013 but in the laundry room, there are some shelves there, and on the top shelf there is a manila envelope.\u00a0 If you were to pull it down, you\u2019d find a bunch of little notes that have been written over the last several years, where somebody will write a note and I\u2019ll go, \u201cI\u2019m not throwing that one away.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yeah, right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m keeping it.\u201d\u00a0 It goes in the manila envelope, and it\u2019s not like I get it down all the time and read through it \u2013\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 But there was a time recently where I just went to the envelope and pulled out a letter that I remembered and reread it, and it blows a fresh wind of hope into your sails when that happens.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\u00a0 Words have power, and they have the power to build and to inspire and to encourage and to heal the wounds of the past.\u00a0 We can give godly counsel and encouragement and advice.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m thankful I have four nephews and having been a teacher, education is really important, and I\u2019ve enjoyed working with them in some of their school work and things.\u00a0 But I\u2019m also enjoying sharing with them a little bit of my faith journey, how \u201cwhen I was your brother\u2019s age,\u201d or \u201cwhen I was your age, that\u2019s when I first fell in love with Jesus.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Let me tell you, I took one of them to the Christian book store a couple weeks ago and I helped him pick out a new Bible.\u00a0 Now that he\u2019s getting older, he needs one with not so many pictures.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yeah, right.\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 But I didn\u2019t just buy him the Bible.\u00a0 Thankfully the Lord encouraged me, and I sat there and I shared with him when I first began to fall in love with the Scriptures, and how I first began to read, and what exactly I did, and how I kept a prayer journal, and began to teach him that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s such an opportunity to invest in the lives of our children, our grandchildren, our nieces and nephews, the people that we come into contact with.\u00a0 A simple word, a few minutes, a story, and we can change their lives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Did you do that on the spur of the moment?\u00a0 Did it just come to you in the moment, or do you at the beginning of a day stop and think, \u201cOkay, where can I plant some encouraging words today?\u201d\u00a0 Or do you just let it happen?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s a good question.\u00a0 I think the best for me is when I do a little bit of both when I make the choice to be deliberate and to look for people that I can encourage, or to identify people that God has put in my life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, sometimes it\u2019s an interruption of our day.\u00a0 I\u2019ve got a to-do list a mile long, and I\u2019m sure you have one, too, but there are times when God puts it on your heart:\u00a0 set it down, pick up the phone, go for coffee, and speak into that person\u2019s life.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you see the tears well up, when you see that God is ministering to them, you know that it\u2019s worth it.\u00a0 Okay, the laundry can wait, but I\u2019ve just had a chance to be the voice of Jesus in their life and to speak his words of hope and comfort and healing.\u00a0 There are other times it is very spontaneous and spur-of-the-moment, but I think it starts with an overall awareness of the power of those words.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, one thing that you\u2019re modeling that we haven\u2019t heard that much of here on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is being a good aunt, you know?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Or a good uncle.\u00a0 I mean, truthfully, I look back on my experience of being an uncle, and I wouldn\u2019t give myself real high marks, and yet, really, I had no excuse because I had aunts and uncles that surrounded my life as a boy growing up.\u00a0 A lot of them teased me, not in a hurtful way, but in a teasing way to make me aware that I was loved --\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> -- and that I was an insider.\u00a0 I think we need to be doing more as aunts and uncles, because young people today need a chorus of voices speaking into them, turning them away from the culture, the world, their own selfishness, and calling them to what God wants them to be and do with their lives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\u00a0 I think sometimes we can fill the gap.\u00a0 Moms and Dads get tired and worn out and stressed out and frustrated and don\u2019t always have the patience to listen and interact, so that\u2019s where I see my role as an aunt and my friends.\u00a0 I had aunts that modeled that for me, to step in and be a voice in their lives, to take the time, sit and listen to those stories, and build something into their life.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEncourage them, and back up what Mom and Dad are saying, you know, so that it\u2019s not just Mom and Dad that say this, but a chorus of people, as you said, who are teaching them the truth of Scripture and giving them words of life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 We have a mutual friend, Dennis and I do, who from time to time, usually on a weekend, my cell phone will ring and I\u2019ll look and I\u2019ll smile, because it\u2019s this particular friend, and I know why he\u2019s calling.\u00a0 He\u2019ll call and he\u2019ll say, \u201cAre you preaching tomorrow?\u201d\u00a0 I\u2019ll say, \u201cYeah, I\u2019m preaching tomorrow.\u201d\u00a0 He\u2019ll say, \u201cWhat are you preaching on?\u201d and I\u2019ll tell him about the passage that I\u2019m going to be teaching on.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe\u2019ll say, \u201cWell, let me pray for you.\u00a0 I was just thinking about you, and know you\u2019re getting ready, and I want you to preach it, and let me just pray for you.\u201d\u00a0 He\u2019s a preacher, too, so we usually talk about what he\u2019s preaching on, and we share it back and forth.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd you know, it takes a moment, and I think, \u201cHow many guys is he doing this with?\u00a0 How many other people is he calling and doing this with?\u201d\u00a0 But it\u2019s one of those ways that he\u2019s marked me, just to know that when I get up and preach the next morning, to know that he has prayed for me, but that he cares about what I\u2019m getting ready to do.\u00a0 It makes a difference in how I preach.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 He\u2019s talking about somebody who\u2019s being intentional and about encouraging someone else.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And how infrequently do we do that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Exactly.\u00a0 Another way we use our words in a very, very powerful way, is by telling people what they need to hear.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Not what they want to hear.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 And that\u2019s tough.\u00a0 We walk a fine line.\u00a0 The Scripture talks about speaking the truth in love, and sometimes we\u2019re too quick to speak the truth, but not in love.\u00a0 But at the right time, being honest with someone, being truthful.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m thankful that God has put friends in my life who will listen while I rant and rave and vent out my frustration or my hurt or my anger, and then will point out to me that\u2019s not such a godly attitude.\u00a0 There\u2019s room for growth.\u00a0 I need to be patient.\u00a0 I need to be more understanding.\u00a0 You know we can do that for each other.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBeing a good sounding board is not agreeing with everything the person says, but is saying, \u201cI love you, and I understand, and I\u2019ll listen if you need to vent,\u201d but then at the right time and in the right moment, especially if we have a relationship with that person, we can speak into their lives and say, \u201cHere\u2019s what I see.\u00a0 Here\u2019s what I hear you saying.\u00a0 Is that what you mean to say?\u201d\u00a0 And give them the opportunity to grow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Sometimes there\u2019s the need to hear what a friend is going through, as I did earlier today, and then after he\u2019d shared what he was going through, instead of offering three points and a poem or a solution, I told my friend, \u201cI just have to tell you.\u00a0 I\u2019m really sad.\u00a0 It really makes me sad that you\u2019re going through what you\u2019re going through.\u00a0 That\u2019s just a hard thing.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have to tell you, that goes against my grain as a man, because men tend to want to fix things.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 We can certainly take a lot of this advice, at least I can, with my own wife, not trying to fix her problems, but making sure first and foremost I\u2019ve had compassion and understanding on her problems, and you use words to communicate that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 And you know you can use words to get what you need.\u00a0 In my relationship, I share with my parents what I\u2019m going through, and I\u2019m blessed to have them as godly counselors still in my life as an adult.\u00a0 I have learned to say to my dad, \u201cI just need to vent, and I need you to listen.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 In other words, \u201cDad, park it.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cDon\u2019t fix it.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cDon\u2019t try to fix it.\u201d\u00a0 I\u2019ll say that to my friends, or I\u2019ll ask them to tell me, \u201cWhat are you looking for?\u00a0 I can come up with solutions for you.\u00a0 I can help you brainstorm.\u00a0 But if that\u2019s not what you need, I don\u2019t want to rattle off a bunch of useless advice.\u00a0 Tell me what you need.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cIf you just want me to listen, I\u2019m here.\u00a0 If you need some encouragement, if you need some ideas, I\u2019ve got those too, Lord willing.\u201d\u00a0 Shoot up one of those little prayers, \u201cLord, help me.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut articulating what we need, and sharing with them, \u201cThis is where I am,\u201d and asking them for what we need, for a listening ear, or for godly advice.\u00a0 Sometimes I will come to my dad and say, \u201cI do not know what to do about this.\u00a0 What do you think?\u201d\u00a0 I\u2019m grateful for the godly counsel that he\u2019s given me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Christin, I think it\u2019s in the heart of a lot of wives and moms and women to want to be encouraging, to want to use the power that they have for good.\u00a0 Why is it so hard to do?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Oh, because we\u2019re human beings.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Because our knowledge and our understanding is imperfect, and because so many times we think we know what\u2019s best for other people, and we are intent on doing for them or helping them to what we think is best, and that\u2019s not necessarily God\u2019s best.\u00a0 We can\u2019t see their heart, and we can\u2019t know every detail of their circumstances, and sometimes the advice we give or the encouragement we give is so misguided.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo that\u2019s where it comes back to really asking God to show us.\u00a0 And each relationship is different; each child is different, our relationship with our spouse or our boss or our coworkers, each relationship is different, and we relate to one another differently.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThank goodness we don\u2019t have to get it all figured out.\u00a0 We have a source we can go to, and we can ask the Holy Spirit, moment by moment, day by day, \u201cGive me the words to say that will bring life to this situation.\u00a0 Give me the words that will be a blessing to this child.\u00a0 Help me to encourage my spouse in a way that they will hear it and that it will be a blessing to them and it will bring life to them.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Life has a way of knocking the props out from under us, and we can go through seasons where the seasons get a little long sometimes, and it\u2019s easy to kind of look back over what\u2019s been taking place, and to start whining, complaining, griping, and worse.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019re just in need, I think, sometimes, as James talks about, \u201clooking into the mirror\u201d of the Scriptures and doing a little self-examination, and take a look at our mouth as to what\u2019s coming out.\u00a0 Fortunately in my life I\u2019ve had some friends who have loved me enough to say, \u201cI really don\u2019t want to hear any more.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, they didn\u2019t say it that bluntly, --\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 -- but they recognized the rut I was in, and they loved me enough to jar me out of the rut.\u00a0 We can use our words to lovingly, compassionately let somebody know, \u201cWhy don\u2019t you use words that are praiseworthy?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think there is something within our own spirits, our own hearts, where we\u2019re prone to gripe and complain a lot, and to look at our circumstances and kind of go, \u201cYou know, it\u2019s a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day and I want to move to Australia.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 But we need to encourage one another to get out of those and words can be that crowbar to dislodge people.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right, and we can choose to speak words, make it a habit, make it a purposeful thing, to choose to speak words in our own lives, words of gratitude, words of appreciation.\u00a0 We need to be counting our blessings.\u00a0 You know that old song; it\u2019s trite but it\u2019s true -- counting our blessings and being grateful for the things that God has given us.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen we speak those words in our own lives \u2013 I\u2019ve learned that in my own life and my own heart \u2013 if I\u2019m constantly complaining and whining and miserable, I make myself more miserable, and I distance myself from God.\u00a0 But if I speak words that are words of gratitude, words of appreciation, words of thankfulness, words of trust and faith, then I build up my own faith and I build up my own relationship with the Lord, because I\u2019m focused on him and not on the problems.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 When our kids were little, and I\u2019ve asked our team to get this song cued up \u2013 you may remember it \u2013 we had the CD, I guess it was a cassette back then, of Steve Green singing scripture songs.\u00a0 One of the ones that we used to sing to one another around the house was the verse \u201cKeep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking guile.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe second time we\u2019d sing it we\u2019d grab our tongues.\u00a0 We\u2019d actually hold onto our tongue, because it was a good reminder:\u00a0 sometimes you need to hold your tongue.\u00a0 And we\u2019d walk around the house with our fingers on our tongue, singing (demonstrating) \u201ckeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere\u2019s so much in Scripture about the power of the tongue, about the power of words for good or for evil in relationships, and yet I think we take it way too lightly.\u00a0 You\u2019ve done a great job in this book of calling us back to the power that a woman has with her words, that all of us have with our words.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, and I just appreciate your writing it and being on <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em>\u00a0 I think, Christin, you have exhorted and implored many to watch the power of the tongue and to tame the tongue.\u00a0 Thanks for being on the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Christin:<\/strong>\u00a0 Thank you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And before we\u2019re done, we\u2019ll see if we can get Steve Green to lead us all in singing that song.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Do we have to hold our tongues?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 We\u2019ll see.\u00a0 We have copies of Christin\u2019s book in our FamilyLife Today Resource Center.\u00a0 It\u2019s called <em>A Way With Words.<\/em>\u00a0 Go online at FamilyLifeToday.com for more information, FamilyLifeToday.com, or call 1-800-FLTODAY to request a copy.\u00a0 That's 1-800 \u201cF\u201d as in Family, \u201cL\u201d as in Life, and then the word \u201cToday.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWell, I don\u2019t know what plans you have for the holiday weekend.\u00a0 Hope you and your family are able to get together, and I hope your job lets you have a little extra time this weekend to relax and enjoy the beginning of summer.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the things we look at here at FamilyLife with summer coming on is that over the next couple of months we will probably see a little bit of a decline in the donations that we receive from listeners.\u00a0 That\u2019s the case for many ministries like ours; a lot of churches face the same kind of thing.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd that\u2019s one of the reasons why we had some friends who, a little more than a month ago, came to us and said, \u201cLet\u2019s see if we can encourage listeners during May to help support the ministry, so that as you head into summer you\u2019ve got a little bit of a surplus to deal with.\u201d\u00a0 And they agreed that during the month of May they would match every donation we receive here at FamilyLife on a dollar-for-dollar basis, up to a total of $750,000.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve been working real hard this month to try to get the word out, make sure that everybody knows about this matching gift challenge.\u00a0 We\u2019re getting down to the wire, and that\u2019s why we\u2019re asking you if you can, today, go to our website, FamilyLifeToday.com, or call us toll-free at 1-800-FLTODAY, and do whatever you can do, make whatever kind of donation you can make, $10 or $20, $50 or $100, $500 or $1000, whatever you can do.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp us take full advantage of this matching gift opportunity.\u00a0 Next week is when we hit the matching gift deadline, so we need to hear from you as soon as possible.\u00a0 Again the website, FamilyLifeToday.com, or call toll-free at 1-800-FLTODAY, and we just want to say thanks in advance for whatever you are able to do in support of the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHope you have a great weekend, and to wrap things up today, here is Steve Green from the <em>Hide \u201cEm in Your Heart<\/em> series for kids.\u00a0 You can decide whether you want to grab your tongue or not. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 Have a great weekend.\u00a0 We will see you back Monday for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve Green:<\/strong>\u00a0 Now you may be able to tame a bucking bronco or a wildcat, but you just can\u2019t tame a tongue.\u00a0 If your tongue is always getting you into trouble, saying things that shouldn\u2019t be said, here\u2019s something you can do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Child:<\/strong>\u00a0 Psalm 34, verse 13:\u00a0 Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Music:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd your lips from speaking lies\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Steve Green:<\/strong>\u00a0 Now grab hold of your tongue while we sing it again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Music:<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd your lips from speaking lies\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tKeep your tongue from evil, keep your tongue.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Child:<\/strong>\u00a0 Can I let go of my tongue now?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMusic copyright:\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTitle:\u00a0Keep Your Tongue from Evil - Psalm 34:13\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tArtist: Steve Green\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAlbum:\u00a0Hide 'Em In Your Heart, Vol. 1 (p) 2003 Sparrow Kids\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/site\/c.dnJHKLNnFoG\/b.3782043\/k.384D\/Support_Us.htm\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 2011FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 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