{"id":302237,"date":"2011-03-16T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2011-03-16T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/healing-for-marriage\/"},"modified":"2011-03-16T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2011-03-16T15:00:00","slug":"healing-for-marriage","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/healing-for-marriage\/","title":{"rendered":"Healing for Marriage"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Does your marriage forecast look gloomy?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-03-16.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"25.29M","filesize_raw":"26521206","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2873],"tags":[4001],"podcast_series":[7793],"cwp_profile":[3091],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302237","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-mental-and-emotional-issues","tag-women","podcast_series-when-the-hurt-runs-deep","cwp_profile-kay-arthur","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302237\/healing-for-marriage","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302237\/healing-for-marriage","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"GxkZa4uLAi\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/healing-for-marriage\/\">Healing for Marriage<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/healing-for-marriage\/embed\/#?secret=GxkZa4uLAi\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Healing for Marriage&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"GxkZa4uLAi\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-03-16.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-03-16.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Kay Arthur wants to remind us that when our path is dark, it is Jesus who said, \u201cI am the light of the world.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 There is healing and hope for life\u2019s desperate moments because he is the God of all hope, because he sends his Word and heals them.\u00a0 And there is nothing that can happen in my life that can destroy me, distort me, no matter what man does to me, because God is sovereign.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLifeToday<\/em> for Wednesday, March 16<sup>th<\/sup>.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 Where does our help come from when we find ourselves walking a difficult and dark path?\u00a0 Kay Arthur joins us today.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us.\u00a0 I was recently at one of our <em>Weekend to Remember\u00ae <\/em>marriage getaways, and a couple came up to me in the middle of the afternoon, and it was a hard circumstance.\u00a0 The wife was there with her husband.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe had learned several months before that he had been unfaithful.\u00a0 He was repentant in his unfaithfulness, but as she sat there with me she said, \u201cAnd then I learned two days ago that while we\u2019ve been going to counseling he has lapsed back in, he\u2019s been unfaithful again.\u201d\u00a0 And here are the two of them standing there, and his head is down and he\u2019s ashamed.\u00a0 We talked about some of the practical implications, but I remember her tears, and I remember her saying, \u201cWhat do I do?\u00a0 How do I bear this?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe talked about a lot of things.\u00a0 We talked about the practical side.\u00a0 He wanted to reconcile; he wanted to deal with his issue, he acknowledged it, he called it sin.\u00a0 I remember saying to her, \u201cI know you want to run from the pain because you think \u2018If I run from the pain I\u2019ll find help here.\u2019\u201d\u00a0 I said, \u201cIf you want to be free of the pain, you have to run into the pain rather than run from the pain.\u00a0 If you try to run from it, it will follow you the rest of your life.\u00a0 If you press into it you can find healing and help there.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, Bob, we get e-mails, letters, calls here at FamilyLife from couples who are in extremely pain-filled situations, and I don\u2019t know all of what is taking place in our nation, but I just think right now for some reason the pain has been turned up on marriages and families.\u00a0 In fact, a number of our speakers who speak at our <em>Weekend to Remember <\/em>marriage getaways have commented that more than ever there are more couples coming whose marriages are on the brink.\u00a0 Our conference was primarily designed for healthy marriages, to equip them to go the distance and reach out to others.\u00a0 But for whatever reason, the culture we\u2019re in, I think it\u2019s becoming increasingly difficult to live a life and live out the covenant promise of a marriage that goes the distance today.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe have a guest with us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> who has given her life to teaching people how to think rightly about everything that comes at them in life.\u00a0 Kay Arthur joins us again on <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em>\u00a0 Kay, welcome back to the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 It is a privilege, and I mean this.\u00a0 I\u2019m not saying it just because I\u2019m looking at you face-to-face, but it really is a privilege.\u00a0 I appreciate so very much, so very, very much what you are doing, and it is so absolutely critical.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs you were talking, I was thinking about, at one of our couples\u2019 conferences at Precept Ministries, that night I was teaching on what true Christianity is, and 1 Corinthians and Ephesians in essence say, \u201cDon\u2019t be deceived.\u00a0 Fornicators, adulterers, etc. have no inheritance in the Kingdom of God.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd so I hit \u2013 and it says \u201chomosexuality, etc.\u201d \u2013 I hit that and then the Lord led me \u2013 I don\u2019t give an invitation unless the Lord leads me \u2013and I gave an invitation.\u00a0 There were about seven or eight people that looked at me to say, \u201cI\u2019ve received Christ.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of them was a very handsome man, and he was in the back of our auditorium, and two days later our staff, David Lawson, who taught at the conference and who has been a pastor, got a call from that man who was a pastor, who had been going out of town and having homosexual liaisons while he was pastoring.\u00a0 His wife was sitting next to him, and so he had gone home and said, \u201cI\u2019ve just been saved, and I\u2019ve got to tell you.\u201d\u00a0 And he went to his church and he resigned.\u00a0 He said, \u201cI\u2019ve been in sin, and I can\u2019t continue as your pastor because I just am a brand-new Christian.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat couple now has a ministry, but we, as a nation, are not cognizant of the depth of our sin and even what sin is, because we don\u2019t know the Word of God and we\u2019re living in an amoral nation.\u00a0 We\u2019ve got to bring people back to the Word of God and back to the truth, and especially the families and the husband-wife relationship.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just got a note from a gal, and she was telling me what God had done through her study of the Word, and like you\u2019re saying, go the extra mile and this is a covenant, don\u2019t just walk out \u2013 and he was abusive to her, physically abusive.\u00a0 You look at this picture of this gorgeous family in this gorgeous setting and you don\u2019t even have the slightest idea.\u00a0 That marriage has been restored, he\u2019s been turned around, because of knowing the Word of God, knowing the power of God, knowing the healing of the Word of God, so that their marriage has been healed and now they have a wonderful family that is continuing on.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Here\u2019s the thing, Kay, as we\u2019re going through life many of these pressure-filled days that we\u2019re under come as a result of the choices we\u2019re making to stay busy and to be too busy and to not evaluate what must be our priority, beginning with our relationship with Jesus Christ and the Scriptures, but then secondly our spouse and our children, and protecting our family.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBarbara and I used to have a date night, and I say we used to have it \u2013 we still have the date nights, but it\u2019s not exactly the same as it was, because we used to have to escape our children to be able to get away to have a two-hour conversation where we were able to recalibrate our lives around what mattered and what counted.\u00a0 And I feel like, as you do, that the pace of life today for many couples \u2013 they\u2019re just continuing to ramp it up and the treadmill keeps getting steeper and steeper and the speed of that thing is increasing and we wonder why people are falling out of the battle and falling out of their marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\u00a0 And there\u2019s no time for healing.\u00a0 See, there\u2019s no time to talk about the problems, to talk about the situation, to be in an atmosphere where \u201cI care about you, you care about me.\u201d\u00a0 You know, the husband cares about the wife, the wife cares about the husband, and so there\u2019s an opportunity.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHealing comes from knowing God, but it also comes in relationships, and in me sharing what God has taught me, me sharing how God took me through this, me hearing, \u201cHey, I can make this because you made it.\u201d\u00a0 It comes from a husband being able to say, \u201cYou know, I just thank you for meeting my needs.\u00a0 It\u2019s hard on me when they\u2019re not met,\u201d or whatever; being able to be vulnerable with one another.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Let me ask you about the deep and gnawing and persistent pain that comes as a parent of a prodigal.\u00a0 Can you speak to \u2013 I mean you talk about hurt running deep.\u00a0 This is the daily experience of a lot of parents who watch their kids abandon the faith, and they\u2019re on a trajectory for ruin in their lives, and you go to bed at night crying out to God every night.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Before I was ever saved I came from a good family.\u00a0 We had a good family life.\u00a0 That\u2019s all I wanted.\u00a0 I just wanted this happy marriage; I wanted to raise my children.\u00a0 I wanted a <em>Father Knows Best<\/em> kind of thing, Ozzie and Harriet from the old, old past.\u00a0\u00a0 I wanted that kind of a marriage and family, and I was devoted to that.\u00a0 And I have a son who won\u2019t talk to me, who doesn\u2019t see me, who wants to dictate how I live, who wants me to stop ministry, and I think that we forget we\u2019re called to a cross.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 A lot of couples when they start out their marriage, especially those who are followers of Christ, they start out their marriage and their family and they have this resolve:\u00a0 It\u2019s not going to be the way it was when I was a kid.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to be able to defeat evil as a family and overcome it and it\u2019s not going to happen to us.\u00a0 And the reality, as you say this in the book, there are no such things as automatics in life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 There aren\u2019t.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 The Bible is filled with prodigals.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 The Bible is filled with prodigals.\u00a0 I remember crying out to God.\u00a0 I can tell you where I was on the highway, and I was crying out to God about my son.\u00a0 I said, \u201cGod, I feel like such a failure.\u201d\u00a0 And it was as if he spoke to me, a conversation in my mind \u2013 I never heard anything audible \u2013 but he said, \u201cAm I a perfect parent?\u201d\u00a0 And I said, \u201cYes, you\u2019re a perfect parent.\u201d\u00a0 And he said, \u201cAre all my children perfect?\u201d\u00a0 \u201cNo.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd it\u2019s not that I was a perfect parent.\u00a0 I made mistakes.\u00a0 I would go back and change them if I could.\u00a0 I can\u2019t.\u00a0 Am I going to beat myself up for the rest of my life?\u00a0 No.\u00a0 Does my son have a responsibility?\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 Are there other parents that failed and their sons still love them?\u00a0 Are there other parents that have failed and their sons still turned out right?\u00a0 Are there other people that have been through far more? -- I never abused my kids, I never \u2013 and they turned out right.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAll I can tell you is it is not the scenario I want, and I have spiritual, so to speak, children all over.\u00a0 I have young men.\u00a0 I have teens that just this past weekend were lining up.\u00a0 You would think that this 77-year-old woman was a rock star.\u00a0 They wanted their pictures with me, they wanted me to sign their Bibles, their grandmothers and grandfathers.\u00a0 We taught them, and here they are hungry for the Word of God and they\u2019re so excited about being with me.\u00a0 And where\u2019s my son?\u00a0 And you stand there and you think, \u201cHere are all these kids. Where\u2019s your own flesh and blood?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right, right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 I was in your home, Dennis.\u00a0 I saw your family.\u00a0 I would like that.\u00a0 I\u2019d take that.\u00a0 I don\u2019t have it.\u00a0 So what am I going to do?\u00a0 Right now I\u2019m crying, but what am I going to do?\u00a0 Am I going to quit life?\u00a0 Am I going to get mad at God? No, I can\u2019t live without him.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe\u2019s my life, and if this is the life that he has chosen for me, then I am to live obviously as an example among the believers.\u00a0 You know when you\u2019re 77 it\u2019s almost over, and I want to hear \u201cWell done.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut when I\u2019m able to take another person in my arms and they\u2019re weeping on me and I can say, \u201cYou can make it,\u201d and I can say, \u201cIt\u2019s not your fault.\u201d\u00a0 Each one of us is accountable before God, and God is the one that saves.\u00a0 I am not the savior, I am the messenger.\u00a0 And God assures me, \u201cHe that comes to me I will in no wise cast out.\u00a0 I will raise him up on the last day.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou come to me because I\u2019ve drawn you, because I brought you.\u201d\u00a0 And understanding that God doesn\u2019t lose any of his sheep, understanding the whole picture of salvation, and I understand it.\u00a0 I know that God is sovereign over salvation.\u00a0 I know that I cannot save my child.\u00a0 I know that I cannot turn him from darkness to light.\u00a0 I know that only God can, and I know if that\u2019s God\u2019s intention, that God will accomplish it, and I am to rest, and I am to be about my Father\u2019s business.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 What I\u2019ve heard you just say, Kay, is your knowledge of God that has come through the Scriptures edits, dictates the way you think, the choices you make and the way you live.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes. Exactly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Bob has heard me quote A.W. Tozer on more than one occasion here.\u00a0 One of my favorite quotes that he\u2019s ever made\u2014he says \u201cThe most important thing about you is what you think about God.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Because if you don\u2019t think rightly about who God is, how are you going to interpret all the hardship that\u2019s come your way?\u00a0 And yet, God is God, and here\u2019s what he says about that.\u00a0 You\u2019ve just modeled it for us, but I want to summarize it from Scripture.\u00a0 2 Corinthians 4, verse 16:\u00a0 \u201cSo we do not lose heart, though our outer nature is wasting away and our inner nature is being renewed day by day.\u00a0 For this slight, momentary affliction\u201d \u2013 I\u2019ll read that again \u2013 \u201cthis slight momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen.\u00a0 For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod must sit in Heaven sometimes and just kind of push back on his throne and shake his head at us, at how many times he sought to teach us not to walk by sight, not to walk by feelings, but to walk by faith and to embrace the promises of Scripture.\u00a0 And that\u2019s what I hear you saying -- you\u2019ve tried to interpret all the tough circumstances that have come into your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 I filtered them through the Word of God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Exactly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 And one of the things I taught is everything that comes into my life is filtered through fingers of love, because God is love.\u00a0 He is holy, he is just, he is righteous, he is love, and everything that comes.\u00a0 And when Paul said, \u201cThese afflictions,\u201d when you look at Paul\u2019s afflictions that he describes in 2 Corinthians, they are temporary, they are light, you know \u2013 but they are in comparison with the glory.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve written a study book on 2 Corinthians.\u00a0 It put me on my face, and it\u2019s \u201cLord, give me a heart for you.\u00a0 Give me a heart for you,\u201d because in 2 Corinthians \u2013 I knew you were going there, because Paul just bares his heart and he lets us see the fears within and the pressures without.\u00a0 And then you come to 5 after he says \u201cthe things which are not seen are eternal,\u201d and then he goes into this: \u201cWe must all stand before the judgment seat of Christ, to give an answer for the deeds done in our body.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn other words, am I going to believe God or am I not?\u00a0 Without faith it is impossible to please him.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd so in 2 Corinthians 5:9 he says, \u201cTherefore we have as our ambition, whether in the body or out of the body, to be pleasing to him.\u201d\u00a0 Am I pleasing him?\u00a0 That\u2019s my ambition, is to be pleasing, for we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ.\u00a0 I just keep telling people, \u201cIf you don\u2019t have time, if you\u2019re reading books written by men and you don\u2019t have time to read the Word, which is God\u2019s Word, man\u2019s writings are the interpretation of God.\u201d\u00a0 But if I\u2019m not in the Word, that\u2019s where he sent his Word and healed them.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd that\u2019s what <em>When the Hurt Runs Deep<\/em> is all about.\u00a0 There is healing and hope for life\u2019s desperate moments, because he is the God of all hope, because he sends his Word and heals them.\u00a0 There is nothing that can happen in my life that can destroy me, distort me, no matter what man does to me, because God is sovereign and he promises.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I have to ask you, have you imagined that 2 Corinthians 5 day for you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 I\u2019m glad I\u2019m still alive, because I think he has a work to do in my life.\u00a0 You know my life is so busy, I mean, with ministry.\u00a0 I have a husband that is such a precious, precious man, and he has not been selfish with me.\u00a0 In our lives we have chosen this path, and we want to finish well.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut I will tell you this:\u00a0 there are things he has to change, and what I\u2019ve just been doing is I\u2019ve been taking time and I started at one end of our house and went to the other end, clearing out, getting rid of stuff, simplifying my life, and listening to him tell me, \u201cYou don\u2019t need these things.\u00a0 Sell them.\u00a0 Give them away.\u00a0 Use it for the gospel of Jesus Christ.\u201d\u00a0 And I\u2019ve been given a lot of nice things because people are sweet and people are generous, but I don\u2019t want to be ashamed, and so I\u2019m glad he\u2019s still got me alive and breathing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, there\u2019s one other thing that\u2019s in this passage that you not only model, but you\u2019re exhorting those that you minister to to fulfill in their own lives, and it\u2019s the way 2 Corinthians 5 concludes.\u00a0 It says, \u201cTherefore, we are ambassadors for Christ.\u201d\u00a0 And Kay, you are an ambassador for Christ.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Thank you.\u00a0 And it\u2019s such a privilege to be here because you all are, too, because we\u2019re one mind, one heart. I appreciate your hearts; I appreciate your ministry.\u00a0 I appreciate your sacrifice, your passion.\u00a0 I\u2019m so excited about what FamilyLife is doing and what you\u2019re going to do for reaching these families.\u00a0 I just pray that people will wake up and listen.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, we appreciate you, and I hope I\u2019m able to have the kind of energy you have when I\u2019m at your season of life.\u00a0 You are a great model.\u00a0 You remind me of Bill Bright a little bit, running to the finish line with your torch brightly burning.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Thank you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 When you\u2019re at her season can we have her back just to see how she\u2019s doing?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 [laughter] I\u2019m 77.\u00a0 How old are you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019m 62.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 So we\u2019ll make a date, about 15 years from now.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Let\u2019s do it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 You mean you\u2019re not going to have me on the program for 15 years?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, we\u2019ll have you back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Did I do bad?\u00a0 Again?\u00a0 Did I talk too much?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It is fun, Kay, to have you.\u00a0 You really are a great friend and a comrade for the Kingdom and for the Gospel, and just appreciate your faithfulness to call the Christian community back to being radical followers of Jesus Christ, and being courageous.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And for taking us to the Scriptures on these kinds of issues, because I think oftentimes in these kinds of dark moments we can look and say, \u201cWhere do we find help?\u201d and we start looking in all kinds of weird places, you know?\u00a0 You turn on Oprah or Dr. Phil and think you\u2019re going to find it there instead of turning to the Word of God and letting the Spirit of God direct your path.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me encourage our listeners, if you don\u2019t have a copy of Kay\u2019s book, <em>When the Hurt Runs Deep,<\/em> go to FamilyLifeToday.com and request a copy; FamilyLifeToday.com or call 1-800-FL-TODAY, and you can make arrangements to have a copy sent to you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me also mention that we have spent some time with Kay and with the studio audience taking questions and letting Kay respond to those questions, and that Q and A time is available online if you\u2019d like to listen to it.\u00a0 Go to FamilyLifeToday.com and you can either stream the audio or you can download the MP3 and listen to the Q and A time that we\u2019ve had in our time together with Kay. Again our website is FamilyLifeToday.com.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think in the conversation that we\u2019ve had this week with Kay Arthur the thing that stands out is often that we just need to be reminded over and over again of some of the things that the Bible teaches us are true but that we can forget in the midst of challenging circumstances.\u00a0 Not long ago Barbara Rainey was speaking to a group of women, some of them regular listeners to <em>FamilyLife Today,<\/em> some of them had never heard about the ministry, and she was presenting a message she called \u201cThree Essentials for Every Married Woman,\u201d where she spelled out the basics:\u00a0 what\u2019s at the core of being a godly wife and fulfilling your responsibilities in the home.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe captured her essential points from that message and put them on a laminated card along with some of Barbara\u2019s artwork, and we\u2019re making that card available to any of you who would like to call and request it.\u00a0 If you\u2019re new to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, here\u2019s a way to get introduced to the ministry and find out more about who we are and what we do.\u00a0 It\u2019s easy to go online to FamilyLifeToday.com, or to call 1-800-FL-TODAY, and just request the \u201cThree Essentials for Every Married Woman\u201d laminated card from Barbara Rainey, and we\u2019ll be happy to send a copy of it to you, and we appreciate you listening to <em>FamilyLifeToday.<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we want to invite you back tomorrow when we\u2019re going to hear a message that was presented just a couple of weeks ago to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners who joined us on the FamilyLife <em>Love Like You Mean It<\/em> cruise.\u00a0 It\u2019s a great message that was featured on board the ship, and I hope you can be with us for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/site\/c.dnJHKLNnFoG\/b.3782043\/k.384D\/Support_Us.htm\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t2011 Copyright \u00a9 FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 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your marriage forecast look gloomy?","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-03-16.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Kay Arthur wants to remind us that when our path is dark, it is Jesus who said, \u201cI am the light of the world.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 There is healing and hope for life\u2019s desperate moments because he is the God of all hope, because he sends his Word and heals them.\u00a0 And there is nothing that can happen in my life that can destroy me, distort me, no matter what man does to me, because God is sovereign.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLifeToday<\/em> for Wednesday, March 16<sup>th<\/sup>.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 Where does our help come from when we find ourselves walking a difficult and dark path?\u00a0 Kay Arthur joins us today.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us.\u00a0 I was recently at one of our <em>Weekend to Remember\u00ae <\/em>marriage getaways, and a couple came up to me in the middle of the afternoon, and it was a hard circumstance.\u00a0 The wife was there with her husband.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe had learned several months before that he had been unfaithful.\u00a0 He was repentant in his unfaithfulness, but as she sat there with me she said, \u201cAnd then I learned two days ago that while we\u2019ve been going to counseling he has lapsed back in, he\u2019s been unfaithful again.\u201d\u00a0 And here are the two of them standing there, and his head is down and he\u2019s ashamed.\u00a0 We talked about some of the practical implications, but I remember her tears, and I remember her saying, \u201cWhat do I do?\u00a0 How do I bear this?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe talked about a lot of things.\u00a0 We talked about the practical side.\u00a0 He wanted to reconcile; he wanted to deal with his issue, he acknowledged it, he called it sin.\u00a0 I remember saying to her, \u201cI know you want to run from the pain because you think \u2018If I run from the pain I\u2019ll find help here.\u2019\u201d\u00a0 I said, \u201cIf you want to be free of the pain, you have to run into the pain rather than run from the pain.\u00a0 If you try to run from it, it will follow you the rest of your life.\u00a0 If you press into it you can find healing and help there.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, Bob, we get e-mails, letters, calls here at FamilyLife from couples who are in extremely pain-filled situations, and I don\u2019t know all of what is taking place in our nation, but I just think right now for some reason the pain has been turned up on marriages and families.\u00a0 In fact, a number of our speakers who speak at our <em>Weekend to Remember <\/em>marriage getaways have commented that more than ever there are more couples coming whose marriages are on the brink.\u00a0 Our conference was primarily designed for healthy marriages, to equip them to go the distance and reach out to others.\u00a0 But for whatever reason, the culture we\u2019re in, I think it\u2019s becoming increasingly difficult to live a life and live out the covenant promise of a marriage that goes the distance today.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe have a guest with us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> who has given her life to teaching people how to think rightly about everything that comes at them in life.\u00a0 Kay Arthur joins us again on <em>FamilyLife Today.<\/em>\u00a0 Kay, welcome back to the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 It is a privilege, and I mean this.\u00a0 I\u2019m not saying it just because I\u2019m looking at you face-to-face, but it really is a privilege.\u00a0 I appreciate so very much, so very, very much what you are doing, and it is so absolutely critical.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs you were talking, I was thinking about, at one of our couples\u2019 conferences at Precept Ministries, that night I was teaching on what true Christianity is, and 1 Corinthians and Ephesians in essence say, \u201cDon\u2019t be deceived.\u00a0 Fornicators, adulterers, etc. have no inheritance in the Kingdom of God.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd so I hit \u2013 and it says \u201chomosexuality, etc.\u201d \u2013 I hit that and then the Lord led me \u2013 I don\u2019t give an invitation unless the Lord leads me \u2013and I gave an invitation.\u00a0 There were about seven or eight people that looked at me to say, \u201cI\u2019ve received Christ.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of them was a very handsome man, and he was in the back of our auditorium, and two days later our staff, David Lawson, who taught at the conference and who has been a pastor, got a call from that man who was a pastor, who had been going out of town and having homosexual liaisons while he was pastoring.\u00a0 His wife was sitting next to him, and so he had gone home and said, \u201cI\u2019ve just been saved, and I\u2019ve got to tell you.\u201d\u00a0 And he went to his church and he resigned.\u00a0 He said, \u201cI\u2019ve been in sin, and I can\u2019t continue as your pastor because I just am a brand-new Christian.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat couple now has a ministry, but we, as a nation, are not cognizant of the depth of our sin and even what sin is, because we don\u2019t know the Word of God and we\u2019re living in an amoral nation.\u00a0 We\u2019ve got to bring people back to the Word of God and back to the truth, and especially the families and the husband-wife relationship.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just got a note from a gal, and she was telling me what God had done through her study of the Word, and like you\u2019re saying, go the extra mile and this is a covenant, don\u2019t just walk out \u2013 and he was abusive to her, physically abusive.\u00a0 You look at this picture of this gorgeous family in this gorgeous setting and you don\u2019t even have the slightest idea.\u00a0 That marriage has been restored, he\u2019s been turned around, because of knowing the Word of God, knowing the power of God, knowing the healing of the Word of God, so that their marriage has been healed and now they have a wonderful family that is continuing on.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Here\u2019s the thing, Kay, as we\u2019re going through life many of these pressure-filled days that we\u2019re under come as a result of the choices we\u2019re making to stay busy and to be too busy and to not evaluate what must be our priority, beginning with our relationship with Jesus Christ and the Scriptures, but then secondly our spouse and our children, and protecting our family.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBarbara and I used to have a date night, and I say we used to have it \u2013 we still have the date nights, but it\u2019s not exactly the same as it was, because we used to have to escape our children to be able to get away to have a two-hour conversation where we were able to recalibrate our lives around what mattered and what counted.\u00a0 And I feel like, as you do, that the pace of life today for many couples \u2013 they\u2019re just continuing to ramp it up and the treadmill keeps getting steeper and steeper and the speed of that thing is increasing and we wonder why people are falling out of the battle and falling out of their marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\u00a0 And there\u2019s no time for healing.\u00a0 See, there\u2019s no time to talk about the problems, to talk about the situation, to be in an atmosphere where \u201cI care about you, you care about me.\u201d\u00a0 You know, the husband cares about the wife, the wife cares about the husband, and so there\u2019s an opportunity.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHealing comes from knowing God, but it also comes in relationships, and in me sharing what God has taught me, me sharing how God took me through this, me hearing, \u201cHey, I can make this because you made it.\u201d\u00a0 It comes from a husband being able to say, \u201cYou know, I just thank you for meeting my needs.\u00a0 It\u2019s hard on me when they\u2019re not met,\u201d or whatever; being able to be vulnerable with one another.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Let me ask you about the deep and gnawing and persistent pain that comes as a parent of a prodigal.\u00a0 Can you speak to \u2013 I mean you talk about hurt running deep.\u00a0 This is the daily experience of a lot of parents who watch their kids abandon the faith, and they\u2019re on a trajectory for ruin in their lives, and you go to bed at night crying out to God every night.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Before I was ever saved I came from a good family.\u00a0 We had a good family life.\u00a0 That\u2019s all I wanted.\u00a0 I just wanted this happy marriage; I wanted to raise my children.\u00a0 I wanted a <em>Father Knows Best<\/em> kind of thing, Ozzie and Harriet from the old, old past.\u00a0\u00a0 I wanted that kind of a marriage and family, and I was devoted to that.\u00a0 And I have a son who won\u2019t talk to me, who doesn\u2019t see me, who wants to dictate how I live, who wants me to stop ministry, and I think that we forget we\u2019re called to a cross.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 A lot of couples when they start out their marriage, especially those who are followers of Christ, they start out their marriage and their family and they have this resolve:\u00a0 It\u2019s not going to be the way it was when I was a kid.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to be able to defeat evil as a family and overcome it and it\u2019s not going to happen to us.\u00a0 And the reality, as you say this in the book, there are no such things as automatics in life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 There aren\u2019t.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 The Bible is filled with prodigals.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 The Bible is filled with prodigals.\u00a0 I remember crying out to God.\u00a0 I can tell you where I was on the highway, and I was crying out to God about my son.\u00a0 I said, \u201cGod, I feel like such a failure.\u201d\u00a0 And it was as if he spoke to me, a conversation in my mind \u2013 I never heard anything audible \u2013 but he said, \u201cAm I a perfect parent?\u201d\u00a0 And I said, \u201cYes, you\u2019re a perfect parent.\u201d\u00a0 And he said, \u201cAre all my children perfect?\u201d\u00a0 \u201cNo.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd it\u2019s not that I was a perfect parent.\u00a0 I made mistakes.\u00a0 I would go back and change them if I could.\u00a0 I can\u2019t.\u00a0 Am I going to beat myself up for the rest of my life?\u00a0 No.\u00a0 Does my son have a responsibility?\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 Are there other parents that failed and their sons still love them?\u00a0 Are there other parents that have failed and their sons still turned out right?\u00a0 Are there other people that have been through far more? -- I never abused my kids, I never \u2013 and they turned out right.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAll I can tell you is it is not the scenario I want, and I have spiritual, so to speak, children all over.\u00a0 I have young men.\u00a0 I have teens that just this past weekend were lining up.\u00a0 You would think that this 77-year-old woman was a rock star.\u00a0 They wanted their pictures with me, they wanted me to sign their Bibles, their grandmothers and grandfathers.\u00a0 We taught them, and here they are hungry for the Word of God and they\u2019re so excited about being with me.\u00a0 And where\u2019s my son?\u00a0 And you stand there and you think, \u201cHere are all these kids. Where\u2019s your own flesh and blood?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right, right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 I was in your home, Dennis.\u00a0 I saw your family.\u00a0 I would like that.\u00a0 I\u2019d take that.\u00a0 I don\u2019t have it.\u00a0 So what am I going to do?\u00a0 Right now I\u2019m crying, but what am I going to do?\u00a0 Am I going to quit life?\u00a0 Am I going to get mad at God? No, I can\u2019t live without him.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe\u2019s my life, and if this is the life that he has chosen for me, then I am to live obviously as an example among the believers.\u00a0 You know when you\u2019re 77 it\u2019s almost over, and I want to hear \u201cWell done.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut when I\u2019m able to take another person in my arms and they\u2019re weeping on me and I can say, \u201cYou can make it,\u201d and I can say, \u201cIt\u2019s not your fault.\u201d\u00a0 Each one of us is accountable before God, and God is the one that saves.\u00a0 I am not the savior, I am the messenger.\u00a0 And God assures me, \u201cHe that comes to me I will in no wise cast out.\u00a0 I will raise him up on the last day.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou come to me because I\u2019ve drawn you, because I brought you.\u201d\u00a0 And understanding that God doesn\u2019t lose any of his sheep, understanding the whole picture of salvation, and I understand it.\u00a0 I know that God is sovereign over salvation.\u00a0 I know that I cannot save my child.\u00a0 I know that I cannot turn him from darkness to light.\u00a0 I know that only God can, and I know if that\u2019s God\u2019s intention, that God will accomplish it, and I am to rest, and I am to be about my Father\u2019s business.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 What I\u2019ve heard you just say, Kay, is your knowledge of God that has come through the Scriptures edits, dictates the way you think, the choices you make and the way you live.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes. Exactly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Bob has heard me quote A.W. Tozer on more than one occasion here.\u00a0 One of my favorite quotes that he\u2019s ever made\u2014he says \u201cThe most important thing about you is what you think about God.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Because if you don\u2019t think rightly about who God is, how are you going to interpret all the hardship that\u2019s come your way?\u00a0 And yet, God is God, and here\u2019s what he says about that.\u00a0 You\u2019ve just modeled it for us, but I want to summarize it from Scripture.\u00a0 2 Corinthians 4, verse 16:\u00a0 \u201cSo we do not lose heart, though our outer nature is wasting away and our inner nature is being renewed day by day.\u00a0 For this slight, momentary affliction\u201d \u2013 I\u2019ll read that again \u2013 \u201cthis slight momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen.\u00a0 For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod must sit in Heaven sometimes and just kind of push back on his throne and shake his head at us, at how many times he sought to teach us not to walk by sight, not to walk by feelings, but to walk by faith and to embrace the promises of Scripture.\u00a0 And that\u2019s what I hear you saying -- you\u2019ve tried to interpret all the tough circumstances that have come into your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 I filtered them through the Word of God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Exactly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 And one of the things I taught is everything that comes into my life is filtered through fingers of love, because God is love.\u00a0 He is holy, he is just, he is righteous, he is love, and everything that comes.\u00a0 And when Paul said, \u201cThese afflictions,\u201d when you look at Paul\u2019s afflictions that he describes in 2 Corinthians, they are temporary, they are light, you know \u2013 but they are in comparison with the glory.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve written a study book on 2 Corinthians.\u00a0 It put me on my face, and it\u2019s \u201cLord, give me a heart for you.\u00a0 Give me a heart for you,\u201d because in 2 Corinthians \u2013 I knew you were going there, because Paul just bares his heart and he lets us see the fears within and the pressures without.\u00a0 And then you come to 5 after he says \u201cthe things which are not seen are eternal,\u201d and then he goes into this: \u201cWe must all stand before the judgment seat of Christ, to give an answer for the deeds done in our body.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn other words, am I going to believe God or am I not?\u00a0 Without faith it is impossible to please him.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd so in 2 Corinthians 5:9 he says, \u201cTherefore we have as our ambition, whether in the body or out of the body, to be pleasing to him.\u201d\u00a0 Am I pleasing him?\u00a0 That\u2019s my ambition, is to be pleasing, for we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ.\u00a0 I just keep telling people, \u201cIf you don\u2019t have time, if you\u2019re reading books written by men and you don\u2019t have time to read the Word, which is God\u2019s Word, man\u2019s writings are the interpretation of God.\u201d\u00a0 But if I\u2019m not in the Word, that\u2019s where he sent his Word and healed them.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd that\u2019s what <em>When the Hurt Runs Deep<\/em> is all about.\u00a0 There is healing and hope for life\u2019s desperate moments, because he is the God of all hope, because he sends his Word and heals them.\u00a0 There is nothing that can happen in my life that can destroy me, distort me, no matter what man does to me, because God is sovereign and he promises.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I have to ask you, have you imagined that 2 Corinthians 5 day for you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 I\u2019m glad I\u2019m still alive, because I think he has a work to do in my life.\u00a0 You know my life is so busy, I mean, with ministry.\u00a0 I have a husband that is such a precious, precious man, and he has not been selfish with me.\u00a0 In our lives we have chosen this path, and we want to finish well.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut I will tell you this:\u00a0 there are things he has to change, and what I\u2019ve just been doing is I\u2019ve been taking time and I started at one end of our house and went to the other end, clearing out, getting rid of stuff, simplifying my life, and listening to him tell me, \u201cYou don\u2019t need these things.\u00a0 Sell them.\u00a0 Give them away.\u00a0 Use it for the gospel of Jesus Christ.\u201d\u00a0 And I\u2019ve been given a lot of nice things because people are sweet and people are generous, but I don\u2019t want to be ashamed, and so I\u2019m glad he\u2019s still got me alive and breathing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, there\u2019s one other thing that\u2019s in this passage that you not only model, but you\u2019re exhorting those that you minister to to fulfill in their own lives, and it\u2019s the way 2 Corinthians 5 concludes.\u00a0 It says, \u201cTherefore, we are ambassadors for Christ.\u201d\u00a0 And Kay, you are an ambassador for Christ.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Thank you.\u00a0 And it\u2019s such a privilege to be here because you all are, too, because we\u2019re one mind, one heart. I appreciate your hearts; I appreciate your ministry.\u00a0 I appreciate your sacrifice, your passion.\u00a0 I\u2019m so excited about what FamilyLife is doing and what you\u2019re going to do for reaching these families.\u00a0 I just pray that people will wake up and listen.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, we appreciate you, and I hope I\u2019m able to have the kind of energy you have when I\u2019m at your season of life.\u00a0 You are a great model.\u00a0 You remind me of Bill Bright a little bit, running to the finish line with your torch brightly burning.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Thank you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 When you\u2019re at her season can we have her back just to see how she\u2019s doing?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 [laughter] I\u2019m 77.\u00a0 How old are you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019m 62.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 So we\u2019ll make a date, about 15 years from now.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Let\u2019s do it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 You mean you\u2019re not going to have me on the program for 15 years?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, we\u2019ll have you back.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Kay:<\/strong>\u00a0 Did I do bad?\u00a0 Again?\u00a0 Did I talk too much?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It is fun, Kay, to have you.\u00a0 You really are a great friend and a comrade for the Kingdom and for the Gospel, and just appreciate your faithfulness to call the Christian community back to being radical followers of Jesus Christ, and being courageous.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And for taking us to the Scriptures on these kinds of issues, because I think oftentimes in these kinds of dark moments we can look and say, \u201cWhere do we find help?\u201d and we start looking in all kinds of weird places, you know?\u00a0 You turn on Oprah or Dr. Phil and think you\u2019re going to find it there instead of turning to the Word of God and letting the Spirit of God direct your path.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me encourage our listeners, if you don\u2019t have a copy of Kay\u2019s book, <em>When the Hurt Runs Deep,<\/em> go to FamilyLifeToday.com and request a copy; FamilyLifeToday.com or call 1-800-FL-TODAY, and you can make arrangements to have a copy sent to you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me also mention that we have spent some time with Kay and with the studio audience taking questions and letting Kay respond to those questions, and that Q and A time is available online if you\u2019d like to listen to it.\u00a0 Go to FamilyLifeToday.com and you can either stream the audio or you can download the MP3 and listen to the Q and A time that we\u2019ve had in our time together with Kay. Again our website is FamilyLifeToday.com.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think in the conversation that we\u2019ve had this week with Kay Arthur the thing that stands out is often that we just need to be reminded over and over again of some of the things that the Bible teaches us are true but that we can forget in the midst of challenging circumstances.\u00a0 Not long ago Barbara Rainey was speaking to a group of women, some of them regular listeners to <em>FamilyLife Today,<\/em> some of them had never heard about the ministry, and she was presenting a message she called \u201cThree Essentials for Every Married Woman,\u201d where she spelled out the basics:\u00a0 what\u2019s at the core of being a godly wife and fulfilling your responsibilities in the home.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe captured her essential points from that message and put them on a laminated card along with some of Barbara\u2019s artwork, and we\u2019re making that card available to any of you who would like to call and request it.\u00a0 If you\u2019re new to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, here\u2019s a way to get introduced to the ministry and find out more about who we are and what we do.\u00a0 It\u2019s easy to go online to FamilyLifeToday.com, or to call 1-800-FL-TODAY, and just request the \u201cThree Essentials for Every Married Woman\u201d laminated card from Barbara Rainey, and we\u2019ll be happy to send a copy of it to you, and we appreciate you listening to <em>FamilyLifeToday.<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we want to invite you back tomorrow when we\u2019re going to hear a message that was presented just a couple of weeks ago to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners who joined us on the FamilyLife <em>Love Like You Mean It<\/em> cruise.\u00a0 It\u2019s a great message that was featured on board the ship, and I hope you can be with us for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/site\/c.dnJHKLNnFoG\/b.3782043\/k.384D\/Support_Us.htm\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t2011 Copyright \u00a9 FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/302237","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=302237"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=302237"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=302237"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=302237"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=302237"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=302237"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=302237"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}