{"id":302202,"date":"2011-01-31T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2011-01-31T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/widening-the-circle-of-influence\/"},"modified":"2011-01-31T12:00:00","modified_gmt":"2011-01-31T17:00:00","slug":"widening-the-circle-of-influence","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/widening-the-circle-of-influence\/","title":{"rendered":"Widening the Circle of Influence"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Do you need some help spiritually leading your children?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-01-31.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"27.07M","filesize_raw":"28387505","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2881],"tags":[4798,2209],"podcast_series":[7784],"cwp_profile":[9222],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302202","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-young-children","tag-kids","tag-parenting","podcast_series-parenting-beyond-your-capacity","cwp_profile-reggie-joiner","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302202\/widening-the-circle-of-influence","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302202\/widening-the-circle-of-influence","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"d0Jb8FrnGh\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/widening-the-circle-of-influence\/\">Widening the Circle of Influence<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/widening-the-circle-of-influence\/embed\/#?secret=d0Jb8FrnGh\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Widening the Circle of Influence&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"d0Jb8FrnGh\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-01-31.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-01-31.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Reggie Joiner has an important word for the young men who work on church staffs as youth pastors or student ministers.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>One of the most critical things that I think astudent pastor can do instead of leading within a \u201cPied Piper\u201d type of strategy, where they\u2019re drawing the student to themselves, is turn the heart of the son and daughter to the father and mother, even if the father and mother aren\u2019t Christians.\u00a0 Because it\u2019s in pursuing the right relationship with a father or mother that they will learn the principals of family and parenting that they can carry over into their own life one day, into their own parenting experience, into their own marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday, January 31st.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to talk today with Reggie Joiner about how families and churches can work side by side together to raise up the next generation of young men and women who love Jesus.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m not trying to get political here at the beginning.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You aren\u2019t?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 No.\u00a0 But it may sound like it at first.\u00a0 Do you remember years ago a book came out by the now Secretary of State, then First Lady of the United States, called <em>It Takes a Village to Raise a Child<\/em>?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I do recall that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And it was based on an African proverb that it does take a village to raise a child.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It does.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 So you would agree with her premise?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I do!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Because there were a lot of people when the book came out, remember, going \u201cit doesn\u2019t.\u201d\u00a0 It takes parents and they\u2019re trying to take our kids away.\u00a0 Remember that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, I remember that.\u00a0 And honestly it\u2019s too bad today that because of one party of one stripe or another said something the other party just automatically thinks the worst.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 They just jump all over it, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 They do and I have to admit when it came out I thought, \u201cI think she\u2019s got some important things to say there.\u201d\u00a0 Our guest today on our broadcast has got some very good things to say.\u00a0 He\u2019s a kindred spirit guy, Bob.\u00a0 In fact, anybody who can have Jeff Foxworthy write the forward to his book has to be a good guy.\u00a0 A courageous guy!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 He\u2019s smarter than a second grader or whatever that is, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Maybe.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Reggie Joiner joins us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Reggie, welcome to the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 It\u2019s good to be here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Reggie is the founder of Rethink Group.\u00a0 Explain what that is to our listeners.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 We\u2019re an organization that helps churches and families reinvent how they raise the next generation, in a lot of ways because we think it takes the influence of the parent and the influence of the church.\u00a0 So we want to help churches and families rethink the way they partner and rethink the way they do that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 The name of your book is <em>Parenting Beyond Your Capacity<\/em> and its subtitle, <em>Connecting Your Family to a Wider Community<\/em>.\u00a0 You have four children, as you said.\u00a0 You helped start one of America\u2019s leading churches.\u00a0 Take us just to the essence of what you mean by allowing a wider community?\u00a0 Because it really does hitchhike off of what Hillary Clinton said.\u00a0 But it\u2019s speaking of a more spiritual community.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Absolutely.\u00a0 I think it\u2019s based on two premises.\u00a0 We call it the orange strategy.\u00a0 We believe that, number one, no one has the potential to influence the heart of a child like a parent.\u00a0 God designed the family for that reason.\u00a0 But we also believe, and this is almost the other side of the coin but it\u2019s also equally important, that a parent is not the only influence a child needs.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve sensed in our country sometimes a pendulum swing one direction or the other.\u00a0 That it\u2019s all about the family or it\u2019s all about the parent or it\u2019s all about the church or it\u2019s not about the family at all.\u00a0 Let\u2019s, you know, somehow disciple a child without the community of faith and do it all on ourselves as parents or the family is not going to do what it should so let\u2019s do it as a church.\u00a0 We think where we can create synergy and get both of these entities, which God ordained, to align and to get on the same page, then the potential to influence is greater.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was reading a book this last week that was written by someone who\u2019s not a Christian, who was talking about the importance of speaking into the spiritual dimension of your kid\u2019s lives, and the whole book was written to an entire demographic, or generation, of parents who are outside the church, they\u2019re not anti-God.\u00a0 They\u2019re outside the church and they\u2019re trying to figure out how to influence their children spiritually.\u00a0 I think Barna says 85% of non-Christian and Christian parents believe intuitively they\u2019re responsible for the spiritual direction of their own children.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>The problem is the church needs to recognize in a fresh and new way that mass of parents inside and outside the church who are waving their arms and saying \u201cHey, help us do this and do this effectively.\u201d\u00a0 And parents need to recognize the church is still their best resource.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou never were really intended to be the only one who influences the spiritual direction of your children. I think that finds itself in the whole Deuteronomy 6 passage.\u00a0 I think Deuteronomy 6 may be one of the most misunderstood passages because at times we talk about it only in context of parenting.\u00a0 But that passage of Scripture was spoken to an entire community.\u00a0 The church collectively along with parents owns the spiritual direction, or should own, the spiritual direction of a child.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And interestingly, when you get to Ephesians, chapter 6, and it says that \u201cchildren are to obey their parents in the Lord that it may go well with them,\u201d that\u2019s a plural \u201cthem.\u201d\u00a0 That it may go well not just with them as individuals, but with their community as they do this collectively.\u00a0 There\u2019s really a lot more community talk in the Bible than we give it credit for.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIs it fair to say, Reggie, that if you\u2019ve got yellow here, and that\u2019s the church, and red here, and that\u2019s parents, is it fair to say that the orange that comes out of it should be a little more on the red side than on the yellow side?\u00a0 I mean, that parents have a primary responsibility?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Absolutely!\u00a0 Yeah.\u00a0 I would say, though, that even though it\u2019s a primary responsibility, it depends on the spectrum of faith that we\u2019re looking at with a lot of parents.\u00a0 Because in some scenarios, and I deal with this because I work in the real world of student pastors and children\u2019s pastors all the time, in some places there is so much dysfunction in the family or you have parents who don\u2019t understand anything about Scripture, and so in those cases I think the yellow has to become a little brighter in those worlds.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>I think we\u2019re living in a culture where it\u2019s consistently difficult to simply say this is only the responsibility of the parent.\u00a0 Again, if you go back to the Hebrew culture, we have this picture of two biological parents and their two biological children and we take Deuteronomy 6 and we slap it across the top of that, when in reality that\u2019s not what was happening in Deuteronomy 6.\u00a0 They were living communally and so the adults that were around them were uncles and aunts and fathers and mothers and they were all responsible in that sense.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>Are they primarily responsibly?\u00a0 Absolutely.\u00a0 Every parent should understand that the reason why they need to parent with the community of faith is because part of the definition for spiritual leadership is to make sure they put their children in a position where they can help them take the next step spiritually.\u00a0 And if they\u2019re outside of a community of faith it\u2019s difficult for them to connect their children to other influences that will ultimately have an impact in their life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Reggie, I can\u2019t help but wonder what you\u2019re describing here explains in part why seventy percent of the young people graduating from high school and out of youth groups and the church today end up leaving the faith over the next, what, five to ten years of their lives?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 If they had been raised more, and I want to use a word that sounds unhealthy, but in more of a co-dependent relationship with the church, where the parents weren\u2019t trying to do it by themselves but had spiritual uncles and aunts and grandparents looking out for the kids\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ll never forget this.\u00a0 A number of years ago I ran into a father of one of the kids I taught in my sixth grade Sunday school class.\u00a0 I taught over 550 kids over eleven years in this class, okay?\u00a0 I ran into the father and I said, \u201cHow\u2019s your son doing?\u201d\u00a0 He\u2019d been in my class like five, six, seven years earlier.\u00a0 And this young man was doing well.\u00a0 I said \u201cWould you tell him that Mr. Rainey asked.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think that\u2019s important, Reggie, because we\u2019re such a disconnected, fast-paced culture today.\u00a0 Does anyone really care?\u00a0 Is anyone looking out for me?\u00a0 Has anyone got my back besides Mom and Dad?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 I agree.\u00a0 And you know what, that\u2019s so important.\u00a0 I think if we really zeroed in on where the slow fade of faith is happening and you look at the first year or two of college, you\u2019ll see that it just plummets.\u00a0 Once a kid graduates from high school, walks away from the church, the first year or two of college, they got totally disoriented in their faith and relationships.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat we\u2019re discovering in churches around the country is that when traditional student ministries think in terms of crossing over that \u201c18\u201d line and not drawing a false line in the sand that their ministry ends of eighteen, and recognizes that in the first year of two of college, that the relationships with leaders that they\u2019d had, that if they continue into that first year or two of college, they can prevent an enormous amount of falling away from the faith and falling way from church and falling away from activity as it relates to the community of faith.<br><br>What we\u2019re discovering is this, and this is an interesting thing because I get really excited when we begin talking about the influence of other adults in the lives of kids, teenagers, and college-aged students. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think because in my own world I remember when my son because a teenager.\u00a0 I\u2019d worked with teenagers all my life.\u00a0 I mean, I was a student pastor who was supposed to be an expert on raising teenagers, and that\u2019s how we all are when we start off in ministry, we\u2019re experts on raising children, until we have our own.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\u00a0 And you\u2019re only one step ahead of those teenagers!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Absolutely!\u00a0 And I remember as soon as he turned sixteen and things began to change, I never realized no one had really prepared me, even as someone in the ministry, what it would be like to have a teenage son living in my house when he shifted from this state of mind when he was more interested in what other people had to say, what other people thought, and one happened to be a girl his age who was a blonde than what I thought.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember him missing curfew one night and I\u2019m down in the basement saying, \u201cOkay R.P., you\u2019ve got to tell me where you were and what was going on and we\u2019ve got to have a heart to heart\u201d and he\u2019s like \u201cDad, I don\u2019t want to tell you.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want to talk to you about that.\u201d\u00a0 I\u2019m like, \u201cNo you don\u2019t understand\u2026 (I\u2019d learned this in a seminar somewhere) I\u2019m your father\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2026and you\u2019re going to tell me what happened tonight.\u201d\u00a0 He said, \u201cNo, you don\u2019t understand, Dad, because you\u2019re my father I don\u2019t want to tell you what happened tonight.\u201d\u00a0 I just remember walking out of that room flustered because here was a boy who talked to me about everything.\u00a0 We\u2019d had this unbelievable conversation about God and life, all of our existence\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 And now he\u2019s an alien.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\u00a0 So I walked back down, you know, in the basement the next night and I sat down with R.P. and I said \u201cOkay.\u00a0 Here\u2019s the deal.\u00a0 If you\u2019re not going to tell me, if you\u2019re not going to talk to me, then who are you going to talk to?\u00a0 I just need us to agree about the name of the person you\u2019re going to talk to as you\u2019re navigating through these waters of dating, I need to know who the person is you\u2019re going to talk to.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe immediately said the name of a person and as soon as he said that person I just felt this sigh of relief because it was a friend who knew me, it was a friend who I had known all of my life, I knew he would say the same kinds of things that I would say.\u00a0 I knew that R.P. could back up his truck and dump and even if it was baggage and stuff he was frustrated with me about, it was still a healthy place for him to go.\u00a0 I just remember thinking this is incredible.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYears later I thought about that situation, that story. I ask audiences and I ask parents all the times, people who might even be listening to this, when your son or daughter gets to that point and you have to ask them the question\u00a0 \u201cwho are you going to talk to if you can\u2019t talk to me?\u201d will there already be a name in place?\u00a0 Will there already be someone that you\u2019ve been strategic and intentional about putting in their life so they immediately have an answer?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI guarantee there are hundreds and thousands of parents who, when that situation comes, there\u2019s not an answer.\u00a0 And that\u2019s the saddest place to be as a parent because then your choice is a counselor who you pay fifty or a hundred bucks a week for thirty minutes, and that\u2019s an important ministry, but they\u2019re not somebody in your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think teenagers are going to move to this place, especially as they are moving and transitioning into adulthood, where they need other adults who are giving them affirmation, credibility, insight, information, inspiration, and the parent\u2019s role is a role in which they\u2019re constantly and strategically inviting those kinds of adults into the situation.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 First Corinthians 15:33 says, \u201cBad company corrupts good morals.\u201d\u00a0 The reciprocal is also true.\u00a0 Good company can go a long ways towards helping your teenager makes the right choices when he stands at a crossroads and doesn\u2019t know what to do if, as you\u2019ve said, that person has access to his life.\u00a0 Or for that matter, is in his life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, that\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, Reggie, a lot of guys in children\u2019s ministries or student ministries look at the conditions of the families that these kids are coming from and they think to themselves, well, they think to themselves what Dennis thought, when he was doing high school ministry back in the 1970\u2019s.\u00a0 You\u2019ve told this story before.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You looked and thought \u201cMy hour a week is not making a difference in the lives of these kids.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It\u2019s what convinced me to go into the ministry of marriage and family because, and Reggie you know this, because you know this in working with young people.\u00a0 I\u2019d be working with them for two or three years, and I could find that their mom and dad could undo in an evening all that work because they weren\u2019t supportive of the spiritual growth.\u00a0 This is the dysfunction of today\u2019s families that we\u2019re talking about here.\u00a0 And that was the 70\u2019s, with the evil influences then compared to now?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 So a student ministry pastors says. \u201cYou\u2019re talking about me blending with these families?\u00a0 Look, what I want to do is get their kids isolated from mom and dad so I can maybe stand a chance to pour something into them.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\u00a0 Well, here\u2019s the truth.\u00a0 The truth is whether you\u2019re a children\u2019s pastor or a student pastor, you have about forty hours in a given year to spend with the kids that show up at your church on a consistent basis, about forty hours.\u00a0 You can add a few programs and you can add a camp in the summer, but you\u2019re never going to get much more than forty of fifty hours in a given year to tell them everything they need to know about God, everything they need to know about life and grace and the cross and forgiveness and salvation and everything.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe average parent in a given year has three thousand hours.\u00a0 The same eighth grade boy who shows up at your church will spend four hundred hours a year playing video games.\u00a0 You\u2019ve got about forty or fifty.\u00a0 So you\u2019ve got to figure out what you\u2019re going to do with those forty or fifty hours.\u00a0 That\u2019s why we lean into leaders in churches and say part of your strategy has to be to put a relationship is their life.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis can\u2019t be simply programized where there is an hour a week and that\u2019 all you\u2019re doing.\u00a0 You\u2019ve got to put influences into their life, the mentors and coaches and leaders who are in their world and care about them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>The other part of that equation is this.\u00a0 One of the most important things you\u2019re training a son or daughter to do is one day be married, have a family, have their own children, and to break out, in some cases, of some of the dysfunction they have lived in.\u00a0 Well, one of the ways that I think it\u2019s important to do that is to teach the principles of honoring their parents, to teach them the value of their relationship with a parent.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the most critical things that I think a student pastor can do, instead of leading within a \u201cPied Piper\u201d type of strategy where they\u2019re drawing the student to themselves, is turn the heart of the son and daughter to the father and mother, even is the father and mother aren\u2019t Christians. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s in pursuing the right relationship with a father or mother who may not even be a Christian that they will learn the principles of family and parenting that they can carry over into their life one day, into their own parenting experience, into their own marriage.\u00a0 To abandon that would be a flaw.\u00a0 And absolutely, there are going to be times in which parents just do things and we go \u201cWhere were you?\u00a0 How were you thinking?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Out to lunch\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201c\u2026Where did that come from?\u201d\u00a0 But you know, and this is just my story, I haven\u2019t met a parent yet who I honestly believe deliberately was trying to sabotage their children\u2019s life.\u00a0 I haven\u2019t met the parent who walked out of the delivery room and said \u201cI can\u2019t wait to screw up this kid.\u201d\u00a0 I haven\u2019t met that parent.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMost parents have it in them to want to build the right kind of relationship with their son or daughter and to do it to the best of their ability.\u00a0 We can talk about this in a few minutes, too.\u00a0 But I think we as the church and as Christians sometimes have given parents lists that they look at and go \u201cI can\u2019t ever really live up to that so why even try?\u201d\u00a0 We\u2019ve done just the opposite in spiritual leadership.\u00a0 We\u2019ve defined it in terms that are impractical and impossible. So they\u2019re not sure how to get there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 What we\u2019ve talked about here, Reggie, is like gravity.\u00a0 It is one of the laws of the universe.\u00a0 It\u2019s how Got designed it to operate.\u00a0 I just want to summarize with a couple of action points here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Number one, parents need to do a little inventory of how the church is positioned to impact their children\u2019s lives today and into the future.\u00a0 What I heard you saying was make sure you\u2019ve got some significant others in their lives that are developing relationships.\u00a0 We\u2019ll talk more about this later but commissioning people with the assignment \u201cTrack with my daughter.\u00a0 Track with my son.\u201d\u00a0 It\u2019s not a matter of manipulating.\u00a0 It\u2019s a matter of spiritually assigning some folks to get in there with you into the game.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>Secondly, I\u2019d like to challenge people to get this broadcast and pass it on to the youth pastor and let him listen to it and perhaps pass it on to other parents in your church because it really does take a village and it takes a group of people who have the same mindset to do what we\u2019re talking about here, because parenting is really tough work.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 But don\u2019t just pass it on and say, \u201cHere, somebody do this.\u201d\u00a0 You pass it on with the \u201cI\u2019m here to help.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Then let\u2019s make a difference together.\u00a0 And that leads me to number three. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou don\u2019t know this Reggie, but we\u2019ve just spent the last three years working on tools to put into the hands of people who are leading youth groups, lay couples who have sons and daughters in youth groups, to make a difference in those young men and young women\u2019s lives.\u00a0 We\u2019ve created a resource called College Ready and it\u2019s a six session video series that walks a graduating senior or an incoming college freshmen into six categories that they need to grapple with as they go into college.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m not going to remember all of them but \u201chaving a purpose\u201d is one, \u201cthe right friendships\u201d is another, \u201cknowing how to date,\u201d \u201cknowing how to study,\u201d \u201chow to have fun,\u201d and then most importantly, \u201cspiritually setting your sails toward what God\u2019s about.\u201c \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s meant to be led by moms and dads in youth groups.\u00a0 It\u2019s not designed to be led by a youth pastor, not that he couldn\u2019t do it.\u00a0 He could.\u00a0 But what we want to do is what you\u2019re calling parents to do, to get involved in the issues with them.\u00a0 Be a part of the dialogue, the discussion, with other parents and make it not just an event, but make it a hard core boot camp training experience for some of the most challenging days these young people will ever face.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 What we\u2019ve tried to do is make it simple, transferable, so that a student pastor can do it easily.\u00a0 But it\u2019s also something that a mom or a dad in the youth group can take the seniors, the high seniors in your church, and say \u201cLet\u2019s go through this with all of your friends and with their parents.\u00a0 We\u2019ll get them together and go through the six sessions.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s easy to do and you can find out more about the College Ready video curriculum when you go to our website, FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 There is also information there about the book that Reggie\u2019s written called <em>Parenting Beyond Your Capacity<\/em>, where you really lay out a strategy for how families and church can connect together around the assignment of helping to mold the lives of the next generation and point them in a spiritual direction.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, the book is called <em>Parenting Beyond Your Capacity<\/em> by Reggie Joiner.\u00a0 Find out more about his book and about the College Ready curriculum when you go to FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 Again, our website is FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can also call us toll-free at 1-800-FL-TODAY, 1-800, \u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word today and when you get in touch with us we\u2019ll answer any questions you have about these resources and arrange to have the ones you want packaged up and sent out to you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe want to take a minute here at the end of today\u2019s broadcast and say a special work of thanks to those of you who are regular supporters of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Some of you support this ministry each month as Legacy partners.\u00a0 We appreciate you.\u00a0 Some of you make a donation from time to time as you\u2019re able to do that and we appreciate you as well.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, if you\u2019re able to help with a donation this month we have some CDs that we would like to send you that will be perfect to listen to between now and Valentine\u2019s Day.\u00a0 Actually, four CDs we want to send you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne is message from Dennis on how to keep the romantic spark alive in your marriage even when you\u2019re in the middle of a rainy season.\u00a0 Then three CDs that feature a conversation we had with Linda Dillon and Lorraine Pintos around their book <em>Intimate Issues<\/em>, the twenty-one questions woman ask most often about romance and passion and intimacy in marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019d love to send you these CDs as a way of saying thank you for your financial support of the ministry.\u00a0 So when you go online at FamilyLife.com to make your donation, simply type the word \u201cROMANCE\u201d into the key code box on the online donation form or, if you call 1-800-FLTODAY to make a donation by phone, just ask for the romance CD set.\u00a0 We\u2019ll send it out to you.\u00a0 We hope you can listen to all of the CDs before Valentine\u2019s Day gets here.\u00a0 And let me just say thanks again for you support of the ministry.\u00a0 We appreciate your partnership with us and hope <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a help to you in your marriage and in your family.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you can be back with us tomorrow.\u00a0 Reggie Joiner\u2019s going to be here again.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to continue to talk about how churches and families can work together to rise the next generation of young men and women who follow hard after God.\u00a0 I hope you can join us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t2011 Copyright \u00a9 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>www.FamilyLife.com<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["27.07M"],"filesize_raw":["28387505"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-302202.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-302202.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f 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you need some help spiritually leading your children?","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2011-01-31.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Reggie Joiner has an important word for the young men who work on church staffs as youth pastors or student ministers.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>One of the most critical things that I think astudent pastor can do instead of leading within a \u201cPied Piper\u201d type of strategy, where they\u2019re drawing the student to themselves, is turn the heart of the son and daughter to the father and mother, even if the father and mother aren\u2019t Christians.\u00a0 Because it\u2019s in pursuing the right relationship with a father or mother that they will learn the principals of family and parenting that they can carry over into their own life one day, into their own parenting experience, into their own marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday, January 31st.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife, Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to talk today with Reggie Joiner about how families and churches can work side by side together to raise up the next generation of young men and women who love Jesus.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m not trying to get political here at the beginning.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You aren\u2019t?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 No.\u00a0 But it may sound like it at first.\u00a0 Do you remember years ago a book came out by the now Secretary of State, then First Lady of the United States, called <em>It Takes a Village to Raise a Child<\/em>?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I do recall that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And it was based on an African proverb that it does take a village to raise a child.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It does.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 So you would agree with her premise?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I do!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Because there were a lot of people when the book came out, remember, going \u201cit doesn\u2019t.\u201d\u00a0 It takes parents and they\u2019re trying to take our kids away.\u00a0 Remember that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, I remember that.\u00a0 And honestly it\u2019s too bad today that because of one party of one stripe or another said something the other party just automatically thinks the worst.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 They just jump all over it, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 They do and I have to admit when it came out I thought, \u201cI think she\u2019s got some important things to say there.\u201d\u00a0 Our guest today on our broadcast has got some very good things to say.\u00a0 He\u2019s a kindred spirit guy, Bob.\u00a0 In fact, anybody who can have Jeff Foxworthy write the forward to his book has to be a good guy.\u00a0 A courageous guy!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 He\u2019s smarter than a second grader or whatever that is, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Maybe.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Reggie Joiner joins us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Reggie, welcome to the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 It\u2019s good to be here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Reggie is the founder of Rethink Group.\u00a0 Explain what that is to our listeners.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 We\u2019re an organization that helps churches and families reinvent how they raise the next generation, in a lot of ways because we think it takes the influence of the parent and the influence of the church.\u00a0 So we want to help churches and families rethink the way they partner and rethink the way they do that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 The name of your book is <em>Parenting Beyond Your Capacity<\/em> and its subtitle, <em>Connecting Your Family to a Wider Community<\/em>.\u00a0 You have four children, as you said.\u00a0 You helped start one of America\u2019s leading churches.\u00a0 Take us just to the essence of what you mean by allowing a wider community?\u00a0 Because it really does hitchhike off of what Hillary Clinton said.\u00a0 But it\u2019s speaking of a more spiritual community.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Absolutely.\u00a0 I think it\u2019s based on two premises.\u00a0 We call it the orange strategy.\u00a0 We believe that, number one, no one has the potential to influence the heart of a child like a parent.\u00a0 God designed the family for that reason.\u00a0 But we also believe, and this is almost the other side of the coin but it\u2019s also equally important, that a parent is not the only influence a child needs.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve sensed in our country sometimes a pendulum swing one direction or the other.\u00a0 That it\u2019s all about the family or it\u2019s all about the parent or it\u2019s all about the church or it\u2019s not about the family at all.\u00a0 Let\u2019s, you know, somehow disciple a child without the community of faith and do it all on ourselves as parents or the family is not going to do what it should so let\u2019s do it as a church.\u00a0 We think where we can create synergy and get both of these entities, which God ordained, to align and to get on the same page, then the potential to influence is greater.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was reading a book this last week that was written by someone who\u2019s not a Christian, who was talking about the importance of speaking into the spiritual dimension of your kid\u2019s lives, and the whole book was written to an entire demographic, or generation, of parents who are outside the church, they\u2019re not anti-God.\u00a0 They\u2019re outside the church and they\u2019re trying to figure out how to influence their children spiritually.\u00a0 I think Barna says 85% of non-Christian and Christian parents believe intuitively they\u2019re responsible for the spiritual direction of their own children.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>The problem is the church needs to recognize in a fresh and new way that mass of parents inside and outside the church who are waving their arms and saying \u201cHey, help us do this and do this effectively.\u201d\u00a0 And parents need to recognize the church is still their best resource.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou never were really intended to be the only one who influences the spiritual direction of your children. I think that finds itself in the whole Deuteronomy 6 passage.\u00a0 I think Deuteronomy 6 may be one of the most misunderstood passages because at times we talk about it only in context of parenting.\u00a0 But that passage of Scripture was spoken to an entire community.\u00a0 The church collectively along with parents owns the spiritual direction, or should own, the spiritual direction of a child.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And interestingly, when you get to Ephesians, chapter 6, and it says that \u201cchildren are to obey their parents in the Lord that it may go well with them,\u201d that\u2019s a plural \u201cthem.\u201d\u00a0 That it may go well not just with them as individuals, but with their community as they do this collectively.\u00a0 There\u2019s really a lot more community talk in the Bible than we give it credit for.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIs it fair to say, Reggie, that if you\u2019ve got yellow here, and that\u2019s the church, and red here, and that\u2019s parents, is it fair to say that the orange that comes out of it should be a little more on the red side than on the yellow side?\u00a0 I mean, that parents have a primary responsibility?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Absolutely!\u00a0 Yeah.\u00a0 I would say, though, that even though it\u2019s a primary responsibility, it depends on the spectrum of faith that we\u2019re looking at with a lot of parents.\u00a0 Because in some scenarios, and I deal with this because I work in the real world of student pastors and children\u2019s pastors all the time, in some places there is so much dysfunction in the family or you have parents who don\u2019t understand anything about Scripture, and so in those cases I think the yellow has to become a little brighter in those worlds.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>I think we\u2019re living in a culture where it\u2019s consistently difficult to simply say this is only the responsibility of the parent.\u00a0 Again, if you go back to the Hebrew culture, we have this picture of two biological parents and their two biological children and we take Deuteronomy 6 and we slap it across the top of that, when in reality that\u2019s not what was happening in Deuteronomy 6.\u00a0 They were living communally and so the adults that were around them were uncles and aunts and fathers and mothers and they were all responsible in that sense.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>Are they primarily responsibly?\u00a0 Absolutely.\u00a0 Every parent should understand that the reason why they need to parent with the community of faith is because part of the definition for spiritual leadership is to make sure they put their children in a position where they can help them take the next step spiritually.\u00a0 And if they\u2019re outside of a community of faith it\u2019s difficult for them to connect their children to other influences that will ultimately have an impact in their life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Reggie, I can\u2019t help but wonder what you\u2019re describing here explains in part why seventy percent of the young people graduating from high school and out of youth groups and the church today end up leaving the faith over the next, what, five to ten years of their lives?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 If they had been raised more, and I want to use a word that sounds unhealthy, but in more of a co-dependent relationship with the church, where the parents weren\u2019t trying to do it by themselves but had spiritual uncles and aunts and grandparents looking out for the kids\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ll never forget this.\u00a0 A number of years ago I ran into a father of one of the kids I taught in my sixth grade Sunday school class.\u00a0 I taught over 550 kids over eleven years in this class, okay?\u00a0 I ran into the father and I said, \u201cHow\u2019s your son doing?\u201d\u00a0 He\u2019d been in my class like five, six, seven years earlier.\u00a0 And this young man was doing well.\u00a0 I said \u201cWould you tell him that Mr. Rainey asked.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think that\u2019s important, Reggie, because we\u2019re such a disconnected, fast-paced culture today.\u00a0 Does anyone really care?\u00a0 Is anyone looking out for me?\u00a0 Has anyone got my back besides Mom and Dad?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 I agree.\u00a0 And you know what, that\u2019s so important.\u00a0 I think if we really zeroed in on where the slow fade of faith is happening and you look at the first year or two of college, you\u2019ll see that it just plummets.\u00a0 Once a kid graduates from high school, walks away from the church, the first year or two of college, they got totally disoriented in their faith and relationships.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat we\u2019re discovering in churches around the country is that when traditional student ministries think in terms of crossing over that \u201c18\u201d line and not drawing a false line in the sand that their ministry ends of eighteen, and recognizes that in the first year of two of college, that the relationships with leaders that they\u2019d had, that if they continue into that first year or two of college, they can prevent an enormous amount of falling away from the faith and falling way from church and falling away from activity as it relates to the community of faith.<br><br>What we\u2019re discovering is this, and this is an interesting thing because I get really excited when we begin talking about the influence of other adults in the lives of kids, teenagers, and college-aged students. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think because in my own world I remember when my son because a teenager.\u00a0 I\u2019d worked with teenagers all my life.\u00a0 I mean, I was a student pastor who was supposed to be an expert on raising teenagers, and that\u2019s how we all are when we start off in ministry, we\u2019re experts on raising children, until we have our own.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\u00a0 And you\u2019re only one step ahead of those teenagers!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Absolutely!\u00a0 And I remember as soon as he turned sixteen and things began to change, I never realized no one had really prepared me, even as someone in the ministry, what it would be like to have a teenage son living in my house when he shifted from this state of mind when he was more interested in what other people had to say, what other people thought, and one happened to be a girl his age who was a blonde than what I thought.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI remember him missing curfew one night and I\u2019m down in the basement saying, \u201cOkay R.P., you\u2019ve got to tell me where you were and what was going on and we\u2019ve got to have a heart to heart\u201d and he\u2019s like \u201cDad, I don\u2019t want to tell you.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want to talk to you about that.\u201d\u00a0 I\u2019m like, \u201cNo you don\u2019t understand\u2026 (I\u2019d learned this in a seminar somewhere) I\u2019m your father\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u2026and you\u2019re going to tell me what happened tonight.\u201d\u00a0 He said, \u201cNo, you don\u2019t understand, Dad, because you\u2019re my father I don\u2019t want to tell you what happened tonight.\u201d\u00a0 I just remember walking out of that room flustered because here was a boy who talked to me about everything.\u00a0 We\u2019d had this unbelievable conversation about God and life, all of our existence\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 And now he\u2019s an alien.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\u00a0 So I walked back down, you know, in the basement the next night and I sat down with R.P. and I said \u201cOkay.\u00a0 Here\u2019s the deal.\u00a0 If you\u2019re not going to tell me, if you\u2019re not going to talk to me, then who are you going to talk to?\u00a0 I just need us to agree about the name of the person you\u2019re going to talk to as you\u2019re navigating through these waters of dating, I need to know who the person is you\u2019re going to talk to.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe immediately said the name of a person and as soon as he said that person I just felt this sigh of relief because it was a friend who knew me, it was a friend who I had known all of my life, I knew he would say the same kinds of things that I would say.\u00a0 I knew that R.P. could back up his truck and dump and even if it was baggage and stuff he was frustrated with me about, it was still a healthy place for him to go.\u00a0 I just remember thinking this is incredible.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYears later I thought about that situation, that story. I ask audiences and I ask parents all the times, people who might even be listening to this, when your son or daughter gets to that point and you have to ask them the question\u00a0 \u201cwho are you going to talk to if you can\u2019t talk to me?\u201d will there already be a name in place?\u00a0 Will there already be someone that you\u2019ve been strategic and intentional about putting in their life so they immediately have an answer?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI guarantee there are hundreds and thousands of parents who, when that situation comes, there\u2019s not an answer.\u00a0 And that\u2019s the saddest place to be as a parent because then your choice is a counselor who you pay fifty or a hundred bucks a week for thirty minutes, and that\u2019s an important ministry, but they\u2019re not somebody in your life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think teenagers are going to move to this place, especially as they are moving and transitioning into adulthood, where they need other adults who are giving them affirmation, credibility, insight, information, inspiration, and the parent\u2019s role is a role in which they\u2019re constantly and strategically inviting those kinds of adults into the situation.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 First Corinthians 15:33 says, \u201cBad company corrupts good morals.\u201d\u00a0 The reciprocal is also true.\u00a0 Good company can go a long ways towards helping your teenager makes the right choices when he stands at a crossroads and doesn\u2019t know what to do if, as you\u2019ve said, that person has access to his life.\u00a0 Or for that matter, is in his life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, that\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know, Reggie, a lot of guys in children\u2019s ministries or student ministries look at the conditions of the families that these kids are coming from and they think to themselves, well, they think to themselves what Dennis thought, when he was doing high school ministry back in the 1970\u2019s.\u00a0 You\u2019ve told this story before.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You looked and thought \u201cMy hour a week is not making a difference in the lives of these kids.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It\u2019s what convinced me to go into the ministry of marriage and family because, and Reggie you know this, because you know this in working with young people.\u00a0 I\u2019d be working with them for two or three years, and I could find that their mom and dad could undo in an evening all that work because they weren\u2019t supportive of the spiritual growth.\u00a0 This is the dysfunction of today\u2019s families that we\u2019re talking about here.\u00a0 And that was the 70\u2019s, with the evil influences then compared to now?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 So a student ministry pastors says. \u201cYou\u2019re talking about me blending with these families?\u00a0 Look, what I want to do is get their kids isolated from mom and dad so I can maybe stand a chance to pour something into them.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\u00a0 Well, here\u2019s the truth.\u00a0 The truth is whether you\u2019re a children\u2019s pastor or a student pastor, you have about forty hours in a given year to spend with the kids that show up at your church on a consistent basis, about forty hours.\u00a0 You can add a few programs and you can add a camp in the summer, but you\u2019re never going to get much more than forty of fifty hours in a given year to tell them everything they need to know about God, everything they need to know about life and grace and the cross and forgiveness and salvation and everything.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe average parent in a given year has three thousand hours.\u00a0 The same eighth grade boy who shows up at your church will spend four hundred hours a year playing video games.\u00a0 You\u2019ve got about forty or fifty.\u00a0 So you\u2019ve got to figure out what you\u2019re going to do with those forty or fifty hours.\u00a0 That\u2019s why we lean into leaders in churches and say part of your strategy has to be to put a relationship is their life.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis can\u2019t be simply programized where there is an hour a week and that\u2019 all you\u2019re doing.\u00a0 You\u2019ve got to put influences into their life, the mentors and coaches and leaders who are in their world and care about them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>The other part of that equation is this.\u00a0 One of the most important things you\u2019re training a son or daughter to do is one day be married, have a family, have their own children, and to break out, in some cases, of some of the dysfunction they have lived in.\u00a0 Well, one of the ways that I think it\u2019s important to do that is to teach the principles of honoring their parents, to teach them the value of their relationship with a parent.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the most critical things that I think a student pastor can do, instead of leading within a \u201cPied Piper\u201d type of strategy where they\u2019re drawing the student to themselves, is turn the heart of the son and daughter to the father and mother, even is the father and mother aren\u2019t Christians. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s in pursuing the right relationship with a father or mother who may not even be a Christian that they will learn the principles of family and parenting that they can carry over into their life one day, into their own parenting experience, into their own marriage.\u00a0 To abandon that would be a flaw.\u00a0 And absolutely, there are going to be times in which parents just do things and we go \u201cWhere were you?\u00a0 How were you thinking?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Out to lunch\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201c\u2026Where did that come from?\u201d\u00a0 But you know, and this is just my story, I haven\u2019t met a parent yet who I honestly believe deliberately was trying to sabotage their children\u2019s life.\u00a0 I haven\u2019t met the parent who walked out of the delivery room and said \u201cI can\u2019t wait to screw up this kid.\u201d\u00a0 I haven\u2019t met that parent.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMost parents have it in them to want to build the right kind of relationship with their son or daughter and to do it to the best of their ability.\u00a0 We can talk about this in a few minutes, too.\u00a0 But I think we as the church and as Christians sometimes have given parents lists that they look at and go \u201cI can\u2019t ever really live up to that so why even try?\u201d\u00a0 We\u2019ve done just the opposite in spiritual leadership.\u00a0 We\u2019ve defined it in terms that are impractical and impossible. So they\u2019re not sure how to get there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 What we\u2019ve talked about here, Reggie, is like gravity.\u00a0 It is one of the laws of the universe.\u00a0 It\u2019s how Got designed it to operate.\u00a0 I just want to summarize with a couple of action points here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Reggie:<\/strong>\u00a0 Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Number one, parents need to do a little inventory of how the church is positioned to impact their children\u2019s lives today and into the future.\u00a0 What I heard you saying was make sure you\u2019ve got some significant others in their lives that are developing relationships.\u00a0 We\u2019ll talk more about this later but commissioning people with the assignment \u201cTrack with my daughter.\u00a0 Track with my son.\u201d\u00a0 It\u2019s not a matter of manipulating.\u00a0 It\u2019s a matter of spiritually assigning some folks to get in there with you into the game.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br>Secondly, I\u2019d like to challenge people to get this broadcast and pass it on to the youth pastor and let him listen to it and perhaps pass it on to other parents in your church because it really does take a village and it takes a group of people who have the same mindset to do what we\u2019re talking about here, because parenting is really tough work.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 But don\u2019t just pass it on and say, \u201cHere, somebody do this.\u201d\u00a0 You pass it on with the \u201cI\u2019m here to help.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Then let\u2019s make a difference together.\u00a0 And that leads me to number three. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou don\u2019t know this Reggie, but we\u2019ve just spent the last three years working on tools to put into the hands of people who are leading youth groups, lay couples who have sons and daughters in youth groups, to make a difference in those young men and young women\u2019s lives.\u00a0 We\u2019ve created a resource called College Ready and it\u2019s a six session video series that walks a graduating senior or an incoming college freshmen into six categories that they need to grapple with as they go into college.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m not going to remember all of them but \u201chaving a purpose\u201d is one, \u201cthe right friendships\u201d is another, \u201cknowing how to date,\u201d \u201cknowing how to study,\u201d \u201chow to have fun,\u201d and then most importantly, \u201cspiritually setting your sails toward what God\u2019s about.\u201c \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s meant to be led by moms and dads in youth groups.\u00a0 It\u2019s not designed to be led by a youth pastor, not that he couldn\u2019t do it.\u00a0 He could.\u00a0 But what we want to do is what you\u2019re calling parents to do, to get involved in the issues with them.\u00a0 Be a part of the dialogue, the discussion, with other parents and make it not just an event, but make it a hard core boot camp training experience for some of the most challenging days these young people will ever face.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 What we\u2019ve tried to do is make it simple, transferable, so that a student pastor can do it easily.\u00a0 But it\u2019s also something that a mom or a dad in the youth group can take the seniors, the high seniors in your church, and say \u201cLet\u2019s go through this with all of your friends and with their parents.\u00a0 We\u2019ll get them together and go through the six sessions.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s easy to do and you can find out more about the College Ready video curriculum when you go to our website, FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 There is also information there about the book that Reggie\u2019s written called <em>Parenting Beyond Your Capacity<\/em>, where you really lay out a strategy for how families and church can connect together around the assignment of helping to mold the lives of the next generation and point them in a spiritual direction.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, the book is called <em>Parenting Beyond Your Capacity<\/em> by Reggie Joiner.\u00a0 Find out more about his book and about the College Ready curriculum when you go to FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 Again, our website is FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can also call us toll-free at 1-800-FL-TODAY, 1-800, \u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word today and when you get in touch with us we\u2019ll answer any questions you have about these resources and arrange to have the ones you want packaged up and sent out to you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe want to take a minute here at the end of today\u2019s broadcast and say a special work of thanks to those of you who are regular supporters of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Some of you support this ministry each month as Legacy partners.\u00a0 We appreciate you.\u00a0 Some of you make a donation from time to time as you\u2019re able to do that and we appreciate you as well.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, if you\u2019re able to help with a donation this month we have some CDs that we would like to send you that will be perfect to listen to between now and Valentine\u2019s Day.\u00a0 Actually, four CDs we want to send you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne is message from Dennis on how to keep the romantic spark alive in your marriage even when you\u2019re in the middle of a rainy season.\u00a0 Then three CDs that feature a conversation we had with Linda Dillon and Lorraine Pintos around their book <em>Intimate Issues<\/em>, the twenty-one questions woman ask most often about romance and passion and intimacy in marriage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019d love to send you these CDs as a way of saying thank you for your financial support of the ministry.\u00a0 So when you go online at FamilyLife.com to make your donation, simply type the word \u201cROMANCE\u201d into the key code box on the online donation form or, if you call 1-800-FLTODAY to make a donation by phone, just ask for the romance CD set.\u00a0 We\u2019ll send it out to you.\u00a0 We hope you can listen to all of the CDs before Valentine\u2019s Day gets here.\u00a0 And let me just say thanks again for you support of the ministry.\u00a0 We appreciate your partnership with us and hope <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a help to you in your marriage and in your family.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you can be back with us tomorrow.\u00a0 Reggie Joiner\u2019s going to be here again.\u00a0 We\u2019re going to continue to talk about how churches and families can work together to rise the next generation of young men and women who follow hard after God.\u00a0 I hope you can join us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t2011 Copyright \u00a9 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>www.FamilyLife.com<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/302202","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=302202"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=302202"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=302202"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=302202"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=302202"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=302202"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=302202"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}