{"id":302148,"date":"2010-11-10T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2010-11-10T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/give-me-your-heart\/"},"modified":"2010-11-10T12:00:00","modified_gmt":"2010-11-10T17:00:00","slug":"give-me-your-heart","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/give-me-your-heart\/","title":{"rendered":"Give Me Your Heart"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Are your children starved for your attention?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-11-10.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"24.97M","filesize_raw":"26185362","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2901],"tags":[4284,4868,4698],"podcast_series":[7766],"cwp_profile":[9215],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302148","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-husbands","tag-father","tag-husband","tag-manhood","podcast_series-the-masculine-mandate-gods-calling-to-men","cwp_profile-rick-phillips","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302148\/give-me-your-heart","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302148\/give-me-your-heart","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"20vXWyTMuq\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/give-me-your-heart\/\">Give Me Your Heart<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/give-me-your-heart\/embed\/#?secret=20vXWyTMuq\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Give Me Your Heart&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"20vXWyTMuq\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-11-10.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-11-10.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Fathers play a strategic and a critical role in the spiritual training of their sons and daughters.\u00a0 Here is Pastor Rick Phillips.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 When I hear these statistics of huge percentages of evangelicals youths abandoning the faith I wonder what faith they saw lived in the home.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want to be judgmental, but I wonder if it was not really Christianity that they abandoned at all?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLIfe Today<\/em> for Wednesday, November 10<sup>th<\/sup>, our host is the president of FamilyLife, Dennis Rainey and I am Bob Lepine.\u00a0 God has given you as a father the assignment to spiritually train your children and a big part of that assignment is what you model for them.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWelcome to the <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> thanks for joining us.\u00a0 Okay, so I am trying to get the gardening stuff down here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis<\/strong>:\u00a0\u00a0 Well, it kind of feels a bit like a broken record, Bob.\u00a0 Work and keep!\u00a0 Work and keep!\u00a0 Work and keep\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Work and Keep!\u00a0 Just over and over again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Over and over again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Tend the garden \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That is what it means to be a man, \u201cWork and Keep.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob<\/strong>:\u00a0 And that comes from Genesis 2:15, but it also comes from Rick Phillips, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It does!\u00a0 Rick, welcome back!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick<\/strong>:\u00a0 I am afraid it only comes \u2018through\u2019 fortunately it doesn\u2019t come \u2018From\u2019 Rick Phillips.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Okay!\u00a0 So we have it on a little higher authority.\u00a0 Man\u2019s mandate \u2013 if he wants to be a masculine man is to \u2018Work and Keep.\u2019\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 That is correct!\u00a0 He builds up and he keeps safe. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 And you are the pastor of Second Presbyterian Church in Greenville, South Carolina; not Greenville, North Carolina.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 We have already established you went to the wrong place.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I went to the wrong place for a wedding.\u00a0 Only eight hours away was Greenville, North Carolina where the wedding was.\u00a0 I was in your city\u2026 in South Carolina.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 It is a great city! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis<\/strong>:\u00a0 It is a great city!\u00a0 We had a great time all weekend.\u00a0 We never made it to the wedding.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You didn\u2019t have anything else to do, did you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 We didn\u2019t!\u00a0 We didn\u2019t!\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Rick is also the daddy to 5 children; ages 14 to 6.\u00a0 He is in the thick of it about to move into the teenage years.\u00a0 Let\u2019s talk about these two concepts and commands for a man to really be God\u2019s man he needs to \u2018work and keep.\u2019\u00a0 How do those apply to being a father?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick<\/strong>:\u00a0 Let me take them backwards because I think one of the good achievements that has happened in the Evangelical world ; organizations like yours or Focus on the Family; most evangelical Christians have been persuaded that we need to discipline our children.\u00a0\u00a0 So, biblical models of spanking and just discipline\u2026 and I find that most seasoned Evangelicals know it is their duty to discipline their children.\u00a0 And that is part of the \u2018Keeping\u2019.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe need to protect our children from their own sin and we need to protect them from the dangers of the world.\u00a0 Anybody who puts an internet connection in their child\u2019s room should be arrested.\u00a0 I mean that is just criminal neglect of \u2018Keeping.\u2019\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI do think, though, that there is a significant issue of our children that we have learned to discipline them, but we have lost the \u2018DISCIPLING\u2019 of our children.\u00a0 We have, as it were, out-sourced the spiritual nurturing of our children to the youth group and the youth pastor. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI saw a spoof, one time, of a youth pastor who was suing for the right for the parental rights of the parents, because the parents weren\u2019t doing anything and he was the one who knew them and knew their problems and was teaching them the Bible.\u00a0 And it was a spoof, but there was too much truth to it.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, you know you have all these stories of families who sent their kids to Christian school, they are in youth group their whole lives, they went to a Christian college, but then they walked away from the Lord.\u00a0\u00a0 You say, \u201cWhat happened?\u201d\u00a0 Part of the answer, but every story is different, but part of the answer is we are personally, as parents, and especially as Fathers, to disciple our children.\u00a0\u00a0 We keep them safe, but we nurture their hearts.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt is out of the bond of the discipling relationship that we have the influence.\u00a0 God gives us the authority, but we are to have influence.\u00a0\u00a0 That comes out of a discipling bond of love. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob<\/strong>:\u00a0 When you are talking about a child giving his father his heart, what does that mean?\u00a0\u00a0 What is it that is my goal?\u00a0 When I say, \u201cSon, give me your heart,\u201d how do I know when I have his heart? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, that is a great question.\u00a0 I am not sure we ever answer it in a final and ending way.\u00a0 We are to have an influence in our children so that they desire\u2026. And they are sinners and they are young, and young people are immature because they are not mature that and we need to know that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut I remember growing up I had a desire for my father to think highly of me.\u00a0 It meant a lot to me for my father to say, \u201cYou know Ricky, I am proud of you.\u201d\u00a0 And you know he did say that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs a pastor, I hear people say my father never told me he loved me.\u00a0 Now, that absolutely blows my mind!\u00a0 What does it say about a relationship?\u00a0\u00a0 A discipling relationship is the exact opposite of emotional distance; that they feel and experience the fact that I delight in them.\u00a0 I like to use that word.\u00a0 A lot of people will say, \u201cI love you.\u00a0 I do things for you.\u00a0 I sent you to college.\u00a0 I have loved you.\u201d I delighted in you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can feel the joy that I was taking as I was your father.\u00a0 Honestly, when I grew up, I felt the joy that my father had in me.\u00a0 I wanted him to think highly of me.\u00a0 God gives us authority, but by the time they are 16, 17, or 18, the authority is not that powerful and they can read a clock just as well as we can.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, and I will add one thing to what you just said about what it means for a child to give his father his heart.\u00a0 I think at the core it\u2019s talking about teachability.\u00a0 I think it\u2019s talking about being spiritually receptive as C. S. Lewis called it.\u00a0 It\u2019s being spiritually receptive to the truth about God and a father\u2019s experience of God and for the son to soak in what the father was teaching him about life.\u00a0 I think the interplay between a father and a son is as you were talking about but I also think it has to do with a father calling his son out to maintain cutting edge sense of spiritual growth by listening to what his father passes on to him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 For that to happen there has to be a relational connection between the dad and the kids that takes time to cultivate, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is way things like anger and abusive speech are the enemy of fatherhood.\u00a0 I\u2019ve certainly acted in anger to my children.\u00a0 I\u2019ve gone to my children and asked their forgiveness because I\u2019ve spoken to them in a way I shouldn\u2019t have.\u00a0 That really undermines the relationship.\u00a0 So we need to treat our children with respect and politeness even.\u00a0 It\u2019s the giving of yourself.\u00a0 They know when you are doing it.\u00a0 When you are interested in them and involving them in our lives.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of my precious childhood memories is of my father coming home after having had our little dog put to sleep. I met him at the door and he began weeping and held his arms out to me and we wept together over our little doggie.\u00a0 He was my dad and I was his boy.\u00a0 That\u2019s what we have to have.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow going back to what Dennis was saying I do think that like our Christian forefathers they have to see that we have a lived faith.\u00a0 We have to call them to that faith.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 There is no substitute for a boy and girl hearing the word of God from the lips of their father and to hear the prayers of their fathers.\u00a0 Not just rote exercises.\u00a0 I know a lot of people need help with that and we need to help them but the passion of our hearts as we pray to the Lord for and with our children and ask them to pray for us.\u00a0 Things happen like when we moved from Florida we had to sell our house.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t exactly a seller\u2019s market.\u00a0 It was going badly and the prices were dropping and my wife was wearing out.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI got my children together and said boys and girls we are going to start praying the prayer of faith as a family and I\u2019m calling on you to pray.\u00a0 I am not embellishing.\u00a0 God sent the buyer the next day.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur children were not saying look at what daddy did they were saying look at the spiritual experience we had as a family of the faithfulness and power of God.\u00a0 So we bring our children into those things.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I think our generation grew up in an era where fathers tended to be distant.\u00a0 Provider was the primary goal.\u00a0 As long as I\u2019m providing and doing some protecting then I\u2019m fulfilling my role.\u00a0 Relationship wasn\u2019t a big deal.\u00a0 I think a lot of us grew up saying I\u2019m going to be more relationally connected with my kids.\u00a0 Yes, I\u2019ll assume the provide and protect responsibility but I\u2019m also going to be relationally connected.\u00a0 I just wonder if we are still missing it?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEven if we provide, protect, and are relationally connected there is a step beyond that that is this intentional training, nurturing, discipling that you are talking about.\u00a0 You can go to all the games.\u00a0 You can cheer them on.\u00a0 You can be there for them and say affirming things but there is an intentionality that may be missing from what a lot of dad\u2019s are doing?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 We need to personally lead the hearts of our boys and girls to the Savior, Jesus.\u00a0 The father is the prime evangelist in the home.\u00a0 That comes through the word of God and prayer and an authentic Christianity.\u00a0 That commends it to them.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen I hear these statistics of huge percentages of evangelicals youths abandoning the faith I wonder what faith they saw lived in the home.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want to be judgmental, but I wonder if it was not really Christianity that they abandoned at all?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, and there are some parents who are listening to us who are parents of adult children and their hearts are breaking over some of those spiritual defections that have occurred.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhile we are talking about relating to adult children after they have grown and left the home let\u2019s talk about what it looks like for a man to be the worker and the keeper of his kids after they become adults.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can confess here that I\u2019ve now had six children grow up under my leadership in the home and Barbara\u2019s leadership in the home and I\u2019d have to say that one of the biggest surprises, much more than raising toddlers or going through the challenges of the teenage years, was learning an appropriate role by me in my adult children\u2019s lives.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn your book you talk about how a dad must move from being an authority to being an influence.\u00a0 Talk about what that looks like practically for a man to be an influence with his adult children.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick: <\/strong>\u00a0I do want to preface it by saying if you had children who grew up and did not follow Christ it is not necessarily an indictment on your parenting.\u00a0 They stand or fall before the Lord.\u00a0 They are called upon to believe in Him.\u00a0 I\u2019m trying to give biblical counsel to those who are still in it.\u00a0 Not to accuse those who may be through it.\u00a0 We are relying on the grace of God.\u00a0 None of us are going to do it well enough.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTo be an influence in their lives is a different relationship.\u00a0 When you have little children you are giving them directions.\u00a0 It\u2019s the proverbial one way conversation.\u00a0 There is a note of authority and there should be.\u00a0 But as they grow older we transfer the authority to them and with that comes decision making power.\u00a0 We don\u2019t criticize as much.\u00a0 We wait for opportunities.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think with adult children the maintenance of the bond of love is so important particularly if you have a child who has walked away from the Lord.\u00a0 They know their father still loves them and is still praying for them and still delights in them even if he is disappointed in ways. I think that changes in those ways.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I heard a guy express it in this way.\u00a0 He said, when you kids are little you are the cop.\u00a0 You go around and enforce the law and say no, you are not going to do that.\u00a0 As they get older you move from cop to coach.\u00a0 You start to do a little more coaching and say that is going to be your decision.\u00a0 Here is what I would recommend.\u00a0 Here is what I would say.\u00a0 You have to make up your own mind.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen they get to be adult children you move from coach to counselor.\u00a0 That counselor role is a role that sometimes you wait until they call the counselor and say we\u2019d like some help.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 There you go.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Sometimes you may interject.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 May, may.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 But you better do that sparingly, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s a silver bullet.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 That is a silver bullet.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 The Lone Ranger only had so many silver bullets.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 But nobody is keeping you from praying, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, nobody is.\u00a0 The one thing I would add to your illustration of moving from the cop to coach to counselor.\u00a0 I\u2019d add a fourth one.\u00a0 I think you ultimately become their cheerleader.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey are doing life just like you did with your spouse just like you did years and years ago when you were just starting out with your family.\u00a0 You didn\u2019t know what you were doing.\u00a0 You thought you did at points but you were stumbling along and failing.\u00a0 Our kids as adults are not necessarily looking for our approval but I think that somebody they know and trust who has corrected and has stepped into their lives when they were younger now say \u201catta boy.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 The world is kicking them around.\u00a0 They need the encouragement.\u00a0 How many people feel like failures?\u00a0 We need to encourage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Especially in this economy.\u00a0 There are not many young men today in this economy who feel like they are winners.\u00a0 They need dads to come alongside them and say you know, when we first started out we made about $560 a month.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t a lot of money.\u00a0 Now it is a different day today but we know what it was like to be living pretty tight days and having to really watch your pennies.\u00a0 To come alongside them and say I\u2019m really impressed.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, I had a conversation with one of my children the other day.\u00a0 I said I want you to know I\u2019m impressed with how you are doing managing your money and handling things.\u00a0 It\u2019s really remarkable.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 What we are also doing is we are redefining success biblically for them.\u00a0 One of the things that I hope <em>The Masculine Mandate<\/em> will do is to say to men whoever you are you may have a big position in the world or you may not.\u00a0 What really matters is your faithfulness in the relationships God has given you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you are working and you are keeping.\u00a0 If you are nurturing, building up, cultivating, and causing things to grow you have a great significance in the eyes of God.\u00a0 You are doing something very meaningful.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMaybe you are struggling.\u00a0 Here is how God would have you go forward as a man and he will bless it.\u00a0 In Matthew 25 when Jesus calls the sheep to him he does not praise them by saying you built a skyscraper, you made a million dollars, you translated the Bible into some language.\u00a0 It\u2019s day to day acts of faithfulness and love.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMen today are striving and seeking significance and meaning because the world telling them they are losers.\u00a0 The Bible says you be a faithful man.\u00a0 You build up and you keep safe.\u00a0 God is going to use you and bless you and leave a legacy through you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You spent 13 years in the army, is that right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And you were a tank what? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 I was a Major.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That was when he was ten years old.\u00a0 His dad put him in a tank.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t get to fire a tank when he got to be in the army himself.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, actually I did.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Did you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 I was an Armored Cavalry Major.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 That is what I was asking.\u00a0 An Armored Cavalry Major.\u00a0 What does that guy do?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 He commands combat soldiers who use tanks.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019m trying to take a guy who spends a lot of years doing that and now he has a14 year old daughter and he has to start to let go and let her make her own decisions.\u00a0 Is that hard?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, we\u2019ll find out won\u2019t we?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That is a good answer by the way.\u00a0 You need to be careful how you answer it because four years are yet ahead.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 I don\u2019t fear the teenage years of my children.\u00a0 I really give God the praise for this.\u00a0 My wife and I have been working hard at connecting with them and having a bonded relationship with them.\u00a0 My 14 year old daughter is a pretty strong Christian. Obviously there is a maturing process and we are in a dangerous world and we should have a healthy respect for it.\u00a0 Let\u2019s have some confidence in the Holy Spirit and let\u2019s do what God has called us to do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me give you a quick four word way of connecting with and bonding with your children.\u00a0 Read, pray, work, play.\u00a0 Read the Bible with and to your children.\u00a0 Pray for and with your children.\u00a0 Work with them.\u00a0 Be involved in their work and let them into your work.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBecause I\u2019m not very good at housework and painting it\u2019s a chore I just want to get it done.\u00a0 So one of the hardest things for me is to look at it and say to myself your son wants to work with his daddy.\u00a0\u00a0 Engage and work together and then play with them.\u00a0 Do things together as a family.\u00a0 Play games.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t really care about baseball.\u00a0\u00a0 As a boy I followed it but then I kind of dropped it.\u00a0 But when my boys got a little older I started following the Red Sox again so we could do it together.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf we read, pray, work, and play and have a bonded relationship where we are leading them to the Lord through his word and then keeping them safe I will trust the Lord that he will bless them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s all I can do.\u00a0 Be faithful to the masculine mandate and then trust the Lord to bless it.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Over and over this week we have talked with you about what that masculine mandate looks like.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to give you the toughest assignment you\u2019ve been given.\u00a0 I want for you to define biblically what it means to be a man and not a woman.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick<\/strong>:\u00a0 God calls men to exercise authority in a way that he does not call women.\u00a0 God calls women to exercise authority under the headship of a man.\u00a0 I know the world hates that but we are Christian people and the Bible teaches that that is good and wholesome.\u00a0 That is not putting women down at all.\u00a0 He made the woman to be a helper suitable to the man.\u00a0 So womanhood is going to be responsive and to be directed toward the relationship.\u00a0 God calls the man to bear authority, to be in charge, to be responsible and then to use that authority to build up and to keep safe.\u00a0 To work and to keep.\u00a0 A lord in the garden under the sovereign Lord, our God.\u00a0 A lord with a trowel in one hand causes things to grow and with a sword in the other he keeps them safe.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 A man who is locked in on the cross of Christ becoming a follower of Jesus Christ.\u00a0 He has learned the spiritual discipline of denying himself and taking up his cross and following Christ on a daily basis.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes the authority that God has given him is an authority that has weight to it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Not that it has privilege to it.\u00a0 It is a cultivating authority and an authority with responsibility.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 First Peter 3:7, the last thing Peter says to husbands is \u201cso that your prayers are not hindered.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 Guys say to me it sounds like God is going to hold me accountable.\u00a0 Yes, it does sound like that.\u00a0 We answer to a sovereign God but Dennis you said it.\u00a0 Once we realize what God has called us to do it is great to have clarity.\u00a0 Now I need power and that comes at the cross of Jesus Christ where I yield to myself to my Sovereign and my Lord and he sends me the Holy Spirit.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Frankly, if I didn\u2019t have the Savior, if I didn\u2019t have the Bible, if I didn\u2019t have the Holy Spirit what you just described would be impossible.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 And you wouldn\u2019t want to.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019m way too selfish and preoccupied with my own needs.\u00a0 I would never nourish and cherish my wife as God has commanded me to do it if I didn\u2019t have him guiding, correcting, and showing me the way and empowering me to do it.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tRick, you are a good man.\u00a0 I\u2019m glad you\u2019ve written this book.\u00a0 I hope a lot of our listeners will get this.\u00a0 I hope a lot of men will start some Bible studies and maybe sit down with their sons and walk their sons through this and talk about what it means to be a worker and a keeper.\u00a0 That is a great idea.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, I have been talking about this group that I am in where we are getting together about every other week and going through Rick\u2019s book and a lot of the men who are coming are bringing their teenage sons with them\u00a0\u00a0 Last time we had about 25 guys in the room all around a big table just exploring some of the themes of the book, read through a couple of chapters and talk about it together.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt has been great for us to be thinking together as men about what the scriptures say and encouraging one another.\u00a0\u00a0 Exploring these themes, but not doing it in a vacuum; doing it with other guys.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m with you I hope there will be a lot of men who will get together with some other guys or with their sons and go through <em>The Masculine Mandate<\/em>, by Rick Phillips which we have in our FamilyLife Today Resource Center.\u00a0 Go online at FamilyLifeToday.com to request a copy of the book.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, it is FamilyLifeToday.com or call toll-free; 1-800-358-6329.\u00a0 That\u2019s 1-800 F as in \u2018Family\u2019; L as in \u2018Life\u2019; and then the word \u2018TODAY\u2019 and ask about the <em>Masculine Mandate<\/em> by Rick Phillips or again, if it is easier, go to FamilyLifeToday.com and order a copy online.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know Thanksgiving is just around the corner and one of the things we are thankful for here at FamilyLife is God\u2019s provision for this ministry.\u00a0 For more than18 years now we have been broadcasting <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> on a network of radio stations all across the country.\u00a0 That network has grown through the years although in recent days we have had to make some tough decisions and actually shrink the network a little bit.\u00a0 We have had to cancel some stations where <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is heard and part of the reason for that is that we want to be good stewards and broadcast this program in communities where folks listen and where we can tell that God is at work.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, when you contact us and write us a note and let us know that you are listening to the program, let us know how God is using <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> in your life.\u00a0 That is not only a great encouragement to us, but it helps us know that we need to be on the radio station in that particular community in that area.\u00a0 And if you can help with a donation as you write to us \u2013 that is always appreciated and it helps us cover the costs for producing and syndicating <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can contact us online at FamilyLifeToday.com or you can call 1-800 FLTODAY to let us know that you are listening or to make a donation to support the ministry and we do appreciate those of you who are able to help with an occasional donation.\u00a0 Even if you cannot make a donation, we would still love to hear from you.\u00a0 Contact us and let us know how God is at work with the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 We appreciate that encouragement and do look forward to hearing from you.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI hope you'll be back with us tomorrow.\u00a0 Gary Haugen is going to join us.\u00a0 He is the head of the International Justice Mission and we are going to hear about how God is using IJM all around the world to help liberate people from slavery.\u00a0 That is coming up tomorrow.\u00a0 I hope you can join us here for that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back tomorrow for another addition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t2010 Copyright \u00a9 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/www.FamilyLife.com\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\n\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["24.97M"],"filesize_raw":["26185362"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-302148.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-302148.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: 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your children starved for your attention?","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-11-10.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Fathers play a strategic and a critical role in the spiritual training of their sons and daughters.\u00a0 Here is Pastor Rick Phillips.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 When I hear these statistics of huge percentages of evangelicals youths abandoning the faith I wonder what faith they saw lived in the home.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want to be judgmental, but I wonder if it was not really Christianity that they abandoned at all?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLIfe Today<\/em> for Wednesday, November 10<sup>th<\/sup>, our host is the president of FamilyLife, Dennis Rainey and I am Bob Lepine.\u00a0 God has given you as a father the assignment to spiritually train your children and a big part of that assignment is what you model for them.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWelcome to the <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> thanks for joining us.\u00a0 Okay, so I am trying to get the gardening stuff down here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis<\/strong>:\u00a0\u00a0 Well, it kind of feels a bit like a broken record, Bob.\u00a0 Work and keep!\u00a0 Work and keep!\u00a0 Work and keep\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Work and Keep!\u00a0 Just over and over again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Over and over again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Tend the garden \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That is what it means to be a man, \u201cWork and Keep.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob<\/strong>:\u00a0 And that comes from Genesis 2:15, but it also comes from Rick Phillips, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It does!\u00a0 Rick, welcome back!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick<\/strong>:\u00a0 I am afraid it only comes \u2018through\u2019 fortunately it doesn\u2019t come \u2018From\u2019 Rick Phillips.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Okay!\u00a0 So we have it on a little higher authority.\u00a0 Man\u2019s mandate \u2013 if he wants to be a masculine man is to \u2018Work and Keep.\u2019\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 That is correct!\u00a0 He builds up and he keeps safe. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 And you are the pastor of Second Presbyterian Church in Greenville, South Carolina; not Greenville, North Carolina.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 We have already established you went to the wrong place.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I went to the wrong place for a wedding.\u00a0 Only eight hours away was Greenville, North Carolina where the wedding was.\u00a0 I was in your city\u2026 in South Carolina.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 It is a great city! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis<\/strong>:\u00a0 It is a great city!\u00a0 We had a great time all weekend.\u00a0 We never made it to the wedding.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You didn\u2019t have anything else to do, did you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 We didn\u2019t!\u00a0 We didn\u2019t!\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Rick is also the daddy to 5 children; ages 14 to 6.\u00a0 He is in the thick of it about to move into the teenage years.\u00a0 Let\u2019s talk about these two concepts and commands for a man to really be God\u2019s man he needs to \u2018work and keep.\u2019\u00a0 How do those apply to being a father?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick<\/strong>:\u00a0 Let me take them backwards because I think one of the good achievements that has happened in the Evangelical world ; organizations like yours or Focus on the Family; most evangelical Christians have been persuaded that we need to discipline our children.\u00a0\u00a0 So, biblical models of spanking and just discipline\u2026 and I find that most seasoned Evangelicals know it is their duty to discipline their children.\u00a0 And that is part of the \u2018Keeping\u2019.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe need to protect our children from their own sin and we need to protect them from the dangers of the world.\u00a0 Anybody who puts an internet connection in their child\u2019s room should be arrested.\u00a0 I mean that is just criminal neglect of \u2018Keeping.\u2019\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI do think, though, that there is a significant issue of our children that we have learned to discipline them, but we have lost the \u2018DISCIPLING\u2019 of our children.\u00a0 We have, as it were, out-sourced the spiritual nurturing of our children to the youth group and the youth pastor. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI saw a spoof, one time, of a youth pastor who was suing for the right for the parental rights of the parents, because the parents weren\u2019t doing anything and he was the one who knew them and knew their problems and was teaching them the Bible.\u00a0 And it was a spoof, but there was too much truth to it.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, you know you have all these stories of families who sent their kids to Christian school, they are in youth group their whole lives, they went to a Christian college, but then they walked away from the Lord.\u00a0\u00a0 You say, \u201cWhat happened?\u201d\u00a0 Part of the answer, but every story is different, but part of the answer is we are personally, as parents, and especially as Fathers, to disciple our children.\u00a0\u00a0 We keep them safe, but we nurture their hearts.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt is out of the bond of the discipling relationship that we have the influence.\u00a0 God gives us the authority, but we are to have influence.\u00a0\u00a0 That comes out of a discipling bond of love. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob<\/strong>:\u00a0 When you are talking about a child giving his father his heart, what does that mean?\u00a0\u00a0 What is it that is my goal?\u00a0 When I say, \u201cSon, give me your heart,\u201d how do I know when I have his heart? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, that is a great question.\u00a0 I am not sure we ever answer it in a final and ending way.\u00a0 We are to have an influence in our children so that they desire\u2026. And they are sinners and they are young, and young people are immature because they are not mature that and we need to know that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut I remember growing up I had a desire for my father to think highly of me.\u00a0 It meant a lot to me for my father to say, \u201cYou know Ricky, I am proud of you.\u201d\u00a0 And you know he did say that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs a pastor, I hear people say my father never told me he loved me.\u00a0 Now, that absolutely blows my mind!\u00a0 What does it say about a relationship?\u00a0\u00a0 A discipling relationship is the exact opposite of emotional distance; that they feel and experience the fact that I delight in them.\u00a0 I like to use that word.\u00a0 A lot of people will say, \u201cI love you.\u00a0 I do things for you.\u00a0 I sent you to college.\u00a0 I have loved you.\u201d I delighted in you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can feel the joy that I was taking as I was your father.\u00a0 Honestly, when I grew up, I felt the joy that my father had in me.\u00a0 I wanted him to think highly of me.\u00a0 God gives us authority, but by the time they are 16, 17, or 18, the authority is not that powerful and they can read a clock just as well as we can.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, and I will add one thing to what you just said about what it means for a child to give his father his heart.\u00a0 I think at the core it\u2019s talking about teachability.\u00a0 I think it\u2019s talking about being spiritually receptive as C. S. Lewis called it.\u00a0 It\u2019s being spiritually receptive to the truth about God and a father\u2019s experience of God and for the son to soak in what the father was teaching him about life.\u00a0 I think the interplay between a father and a son is as you were talking about but I also think it has to do with a father calling his son out to maintain cutting edge sense of spiritual growth by listening to what his father passes on to him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 For that to happen there has to be a relational connection between the dad and the kids that takes time to cultivate, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is way things like anger and abusive speech are the enemy of fatherhood.\u00a0 I\u2019ve certainly acted in anger to my children.\u00a0 I\u2019ve gone to my children and asked their forgiveness because I\u2019ve spoken to them in a way I shouldn\u2019t have.\u00a0 That really undermines the relationship.\u00a0 So we need to treat our children with respect and politeness even.\u00a0 It\u2019s the giving of yourself.\u00a0 They know when you are doing it.\u00a0 When you are interested in them and involving them in our lives.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of my precious childhood memories is of my father coming home after having had our little dog put to sleep. I met him at the door and he began weeping and held his arms out to me and we wept together over our little doggie.\u00a0 He was my dad and I was his boy.\u00a0 That\u2019s what we have to have.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow going back to what Dennis was saying I do think that like our Christian forefathers they have to see that we have a lived faith.\u00a0 We have to call them to that faith.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 There is no substitute for a boy and girl hearing the word of God from the lips of their father and to hear the prayers of their fathers.\u00a0 Not just rote exercises.\u00a0 I know a lot of people need help with that and we need to help them but the passion of our hearts as we pray to the Lord for and with our children and ask them to pray for us.\u00a0 Things happen like when we moved from Florida we had to sell our house.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t exactly a seller\u2019s market.\u00a0 It was going badly and the prices were dropping and my wife was wearing out.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI got my children together and said boys and girls we are going to start praying the prayer of faith as a family and I\u2019m calling on you to pray.\u00a0 I am not embellishing.\u00a0 God sent the buyer the next day.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur children were not saying look at what daddy did they were saying look at the spiritual experience we had as a family of the faithfulness and power of God.\u00a0 So we bring our children into those things.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I think our generation grew up in an era where fathers tended to be distant.\u00a0 Provider was the primary goal.\u00a0 As long as I\u2019m providing and doing some protecting then I\u2019m fulfilling my role.\u00a0 Relationship wasn\u2019t a big deal.\u00a0 I think a lot of us grew up saying I\u2019m going to be more relationally connected with my kids.\u00a0 Yes, I\u2019ll assume the provide and protect responsibility but I\u2019m also going to be relationally connected.\u00a0 I just wonder if we are still missing it?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEven if we provide, protect, and are relationally connected there is a step beyond that that is this intentional training, nurturing, discipling that you are talking about.\u00a0 You can go to all the games.\u00a0 You can cheer them on.\u00a0 You can be there for them and say affirming things but there is an intentionality that may be missing from what a lot of dad\u2019s are doing?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 We need to personally lead the hearts of our boys and girls to the Savior, Jesus.\u00a0 The father is the prime evangelist in the home.\u00a0 That comes through the word of God and prayer and an authentic Christianity.\u00a0 That commends it to them.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen I hear these statistics of huge percentages of evangelicals youths abandoning the faith I wonder what faith they saw lived in the home.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want to be judgmental, but I wonder if it was not really Christianity that they abandoned at all?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, and there are some parents who are listening to us who are parents of adult children and their hearts are breaking over some of those spiritual defections that have occurred.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhile we are talking about relating to adult children after they have grown and left the home let\u2019s talk about what it looks like for a man to be the worker and the keeper of his kids after they become adults.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can confess here that I\u2019ve now had six children grow up under my leadership in the home and Barbara\u2019s leadership in the home and I\u2019d have to say that one of the biggest surprises, much more than raising toddlers or going through the challenges of the teenage years, was learning an appropriate role by me in my adult children\u2019s lives.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn your book you talk about how a dad must move from being an authority to being an influence.\u00a0 Talk about what that looks like practically for a man to be an influence with his adult children.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick: <\/strong>\u00a0I do want to preface it by saying if you had children who grew up and did not follow Christ it is not necessarily an indictment on your parenting.\u00a0 They stand or fall before the Lord.\u00a0 They are called upon to believe in Him.\u00a0 I\u2019m trying to give biblical counsel to those who are still in it.\u00a0 Not to accuse those who may be through it.\u00a0 We are relying on the grace of God.\u00a0 None of us are going to do it well enough.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTo be an influence in their lives is a different relationship.\u00a0 When you have little children you are giving them directions.\u00a0 It\u2019s the proverbial one way conversation.\u00a0 There is a note of authority and there should be.\u00a0 But as they grow older we transfer the authority to them and with that comes decision making power.\u00a0 We don\u2019t criticize as much.\u00a0 We wait for opportunities.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think with adult children the maintenance of the bond of love is so important particularly if you have a child who has walked away from the Lord.\u00a0 They know their father still loves them and is still praying for them and still delights in them even if he is disappointed in ways. I think that changes in those ways.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I heard a guy express it in this way.\u00a0 He said, when you kids are little you are the cop.\u00a0 You go around and enforce the law and say no, you are not going to do that.\u00a0 As they get older you move from cop to coach.\u00a0 You start to do a little more coaching and say that is going to be your decision.\u00a0 Here is what I would recommend.\u00a0 Here is what I would say.\u00a0 You have to make up your own mind.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen they get to be adult children you move from coach to counselor.\u00a0 That counselor role is a role that sometimes you wait until they call the counselor and say we\u2019d like some help.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 There you go.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Sometimes you may interject.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 May, may.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 But you better do that sparingly, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s a silver bullet.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 That is a silver bullet.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 The Lone Ranger only had so many silver bullets.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 But nobody is keeping you from praying, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, nobody is.\u00a0 The one thing I would add to your illustration of moving from the cop to coach to counselor.\u00a0 I\u2019d add a fourth one.\u00a0 I think you ultimately become their cheerleader.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey are doing life just like you did with your spouse just like you did years and years ago when you were just starting out with your family.\u00a0 You didn\u2019t know what you were doing.\u00a0 You thought you did at points but you were stumbling along and failing.\u00a0 Our kids as adults are not necessarily looking for our approval but I think that somebody they know and trust who has corrected and has stepped into their lives when they were younger now say \u201catta boy.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 The world is kicking them around.\u00a0 They need the encouragement.\u00a0 How many people feel like failures?\u00a0 We need to encourage.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Especially in this economy.\u00a0 There are not many young men today in this economy who feel like they are winners.\u00a0 They need dads to come alongside them and say you know, when we first started out we made about $560 a month.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t a lot of money.\u00a0 Now it is a different day today but we know what it was like to be living pretty tight days and having to really watch your pennies.\u00a0 To come alongside them and say I\u2019m really impressed.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, I had a conversation with one of my children the other day.\u00a0 I said I want you to know I\u2019m impressed with how you are doing managing your money and handling things.\u00a0 It\u2019s really remarkable.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 What we are also doing is we are redefining success biblically for them.\u00a0 One of the things that I hope <em>The Masculine Mandate<\/em> will do is to say to men whoever you are you may have a big position in the world or you may not.\u00a0 What really matters is your faithfulness in the relationships God has given you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you are working and you are keeping.\u00a0 If you are nurturing, building up, cultivating, and causing things to grow you have a great significance in the eyes of God.\u00a0 You are doing something very meaningful.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMaybe you are struggling.\u00a0 Here is how God would have you go forward as a man and he will bless it.\u00a0 In Matthew 25 when Jesus calls the sheep to him he does not praise them by saying you built a skyscraper, you made a million dollars, you translated the Bible into some language.\u00a0 It\u2019s day to day acts of faithfulness and love.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMen today are striving and seeking significance and meaning because the world telling them they are losers.\u00a0 The Bible says you be a faithful man.\u00a0 You build up and you keep safe.\u00a0 God is going to use you and bless you and leave a legacy through you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You spent 13 years in the army, is that right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And you were a tank what? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 I was a Major.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That was when he was ten years old.\u00a0 His dad put him in a tank.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t get to fire a tank when he got to be in the army himself.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, actually I did.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Did you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 I was an Armored Cavalry Major.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 That is what I was asking.\u00a0 An Armored Cavalry Major.\u00a0 What does that guy do?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 He commands combat soldiers who use tanks.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019m trying to take a guy who spends a lot of years doing that and now he has a14 year old daughter and he has to start to let go and let her make her own decisions.\u00a0 Is that hard?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, we\u2019ll find out won\u2019t we?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That is a good answer by the way.\u00a0 You need to be careful how you answer it because four years are yet ahead.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 I don\u2019t fear the teenage years of my children.\u00a0 I really give God the praise for this.\u00a0 My wife and I have been working hard at connecting with them and having a bonded relationship with them.\u00a0 My 14 year old daughter is a pretty strong Christian. Obviously there is a maturing process and we are in a dangerous world and we should have a healthy respect for it.\u00a0 Let\u2019s have some confidence in the Holy Spirit and let\u2019s do what God has called us to do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me give you a quick four word way of connecting with and bonding with your children.\u00a0 Read, pray, work, play.\u00a0 Read the Bible with and to your children.\u00a0 Pray for and with your children.\u00a0 Work with them.\u00a0 Be involved in their work and let them into your work.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBecause I\u2019m not very good at housework and painting it\u2019s a chore I just want to get it done.\u00a0 So one of the hardest things for me is to look at it and say to myself your son wants to work with his daddy.\u00a0\u00a0 Engage and work together and then play with them.\u00a0 Do things together as a family.\u00a0 Play games.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t really care about baseball.\u00a0\u00a0 As a boy I followed it but then I kind of dropped it.\u00a0 But when my boys got a little older I started following the Red Sox again so we could do it together.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf we read, pray, work, and play and have a bonded relationship where we are leading them to the Lord through his word and then keeping them safe I will trust the Lord that he will bless them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s all I can do.\u00a0 Be faithful to the masculine mandate and then trust the Lord to bless it.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Over and over this week we have talked with you about what that masculine mandate looks like.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to give you the toughest assignment you\u2019ve been given.\u00a0 I want for you to define biblically what it means to be a man and not a woman.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick<\/strong>:\u00a0 God calls men to exercise authority in a way that he does not call women.\u00a0 God calls women to exercise authority under the headship of a man.\u00a0 I know the world hates that but we are Christian people and the Bible teaches that that is good and wholesome.\u00a0 That is not putting women down at all.\u00a0 He made the woman to be a helper suitable to the man.\u00a0 So womanhood is going to be responsive and to be directed toward the relationship.\u00a0 God calls the man to bear authority, to be in charge, to be responsible and then to use that authority to build up and to keep safe.\u00a0 To work and to keep.\u00a0 A lord in the garden under the sovereign Lord, our God.\u00a0 A lord with a trowel in one hand causes things to grow and with a sword in the other he keeps them safe.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 A man who is locked in on the cross of Christ becoming a follower of Jesus Christ.\u00a0 He has learned the spiritual discipline of denying himself and taking up his cross and following Christ on a daily basis.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes the authority that God has given him is an authority that has weight to it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Not that it has privilege to it.\u00a0 It is a cultivating authority and an authority with responsibility.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 First Peter 3:7, the last thing Peter says to husbands is \u201cso that your prayers are not hindered.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 Guys say to me it sounds like God is going to hold me accountable.\u00a0 Yes, it does sound like that.\u00a0 We answer to a sovereign God but Dennis you said it.\u00a0 Once we realize what God has called us to do it is great to have clarity.\u00a0 Now I need power and that comes at the cross of Jesus Christ where I yield to myself to my Sovereign and my Lord and he sends me the Holy Spirit.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Frankly, if I didn\u2019t have the Savior, if I didn\u2019t have the Bible, if I didn\u2019t have the Holy Spirit what you just described would be impossible.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rick:<\/strong>\u00a0 And you wouldn\u2019t want to.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019m way too selfish and preoccupied with my own needs.\u00a0 I would never nourish and cherish my wife as God has commanded me to do it if I didn\u2019t have him guiding, correcting, and showing me the way and empowering me to do it.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tRick, you are a good man.\u00a0 I\u2019m glad you\u2019ve written this book.\u00a0 I hope a lot of our listeners will get this.\u00a0 I hope a lot of men will start some Bible studies and maybe sit down with their sons and walk their sons through this and talk about what it means to be a worker and a keeper.\u00a0 That is a great idea.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, I have been talking about this group that I am in where we are getting together about every other week and going through Rick\u2019s book and a lot of the men who are coming are bringing their teenage sons with them\u00a0\u00a0 Last time we had about 25 guys in the room all around a big table just exploring some of the themes of the book, read through a couple of chapters and talk about it together.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt has been great for us to be thinking together as men about what the scriptures say and encouraging one another.\u00a0\u00a0 Exploring these themes, but not doing it in a vacuum; doing it with other guys.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m with you I hope there will be a lot of men who will get together with some other guys or with their sons and go through <em>The Masculine Mandate<\/em>, by Rick Phillips which we have in our FamilyLife Today Resource Center.\u00a0 Go online at FamilyLifeToday.com to request a copy of the book.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, it is FamilyLifeToday.com or call toll-free; 1-800-358-6329.\u00a0 That\u2019s 1-800 F as in \u2018Family\u2019; L as in \u2018Life\u2019; and then the word \u2018TODAY\u2019 and ask about the <em>Masculine Mandate<\/em> by Rick Phillips or again, if it is easier, go to FamilyLifeToday.com and order a copy online.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know Thanksgiving is just around the corner and one of the things we are thankful for here at FamilyLife is God\u2019s provision for this ministry.\u00a0 For more than18 years now we have been broadcasting <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> on a network of radio stations all across the country.\u00a0 That network has grown through the years although in recent days we have had to make some tough decisions and actually shrink the network a little bit.\u00a0 We have had to cancel some stations where <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is heard and part of the reason for that is that we want to be good stewards and broadcast this program in communities where folks listen and where we can tell that God is at work.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, when you contact us and write us a note and let us know that you are listening to the program, let us know how God is using <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> in your life.\u00a0 That is not only a great encouragement to us, but it helps us know that we need to be on the radio station in that particular community in that area.\u00a0 And if you can help with a donation as you write to us \u2013 that is always appreciated and it helps us cover the costs for producing and syndicating <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can contact us online at FamilyLifeToday.com or you can call 1-800 FLTODAY to let us know that you are listening or to make a donation to support the ministry and we do appreciate those of you who are able to help with an occasional donation.\u00a0 Even if you cannot make a donation, we would still love to hear from you.\u00a0 Contact us and let us know how God is at work with the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 We appreciate that encouragement and do look forward to hearing from you.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI hope you'll be back with us tomorrow.\u00a0 Gary Haugen is going to join us.\u00a0 He is the head of the International Justice Mission and we are going to hear about how God is using IJM all around the world to help liberate people from slavery.\u00a0 That is coming up tomorrow.\u00a0 I hope you can join us here for that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back tomorrow for another addition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t2010 Copyright \u00a9 FamilyLife. 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