{"id":302099,"date":"2010-08-26T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2010-08-26T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/marriage-patterned-after-the-trinity\/"},"modified":"2010-08-26T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2010-08-26T15:00:00","slug":"marriage-patterned-after-the-trinity","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/marriage-patterned-after-the-trinity\/","title":{"rendered":"Marriage:  Patterned After the Trinity"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Have you been clueless about marriage?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-08-26.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"23.06M","filesize_raw":"24178642","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2805],"tags":[5158,5159],"podcast_series":[7750],"cwp_profile":[],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302099","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-gods-plan-for-marriage","tag-what-is-marriage","tag-why-get-married","podcast_series-seven-reasons-why-god-created-marriage","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302099\/marriage-patterned-after-the-trinity","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302099\/marriage-patterned-after-the-trinity","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"kBWOR5FD6U\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/marriage-patterned-after-the-trinity\/\">Marriage:  Patterned After the Trinity<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/marriage-patterned-after-the-trinity\/embed\/#?secret=kBWOR5FD6U\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Marriage:  Patterned After the Trinity&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"kBWOR5FD6U\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-08-26.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-08-26.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>The number 1 reason why our marriages are failing is because of pride and selfishness.\u00a0 In most marriage relationships it\u2019s kind of like a tick on a dog.\u00a0 You know, a tick is on the dog for what he can get off the dog.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t care what gender the dog is.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t care what breed the dog is\u2014long-hair, short-hair.\u00a0 The tick is on the dog to get off the dog what it can get.\u00a0 The problem in our marriages is that we have two ticks and no dog.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Thursday, August 26th.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 Pastor James Ford joins us today to give us some straight talk on what makes a marriage work.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWelcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>; thanks for joining us.\u00a0 You know, at our FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae marriage getaways that we do with couples, we start off on Friday night talking about the things that threaten the marriage relationship.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I remember you had a conversation at one point with an African American pastor.\u00a0 You were telling him about the Weekend to Remember\u00ae.\u00a0 He said that if you were doing the conference with an African American audience rather than starting with the things that threaten the marriage relationship you really would have to start with why there ought to be a marriage relationship in the first place. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Right.\u00a0 And he is just speaking about how in his community the breakdown of the family was so radical that we needed to take a step further back and just define marriage and family around God\u2019s purposes.\u00a0 Fortunately we have an expert with us from south Chicago, a pastor.\u00a0 You don\u2019t need to look around for someone else in the studio!\u00a0 It\u2019s you, James.\u00a0 James Ford joins us once again on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You said, \u201cExpert.\u201d\u00a0 You threw me off.\u00a0 (laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Welcome to the broadcast, James.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Oh, it is good to be here.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>James is the senior pastor of Christ Bible Church, formerly South Shore Baptist Church in Chicago.\u00a0 He has been there since 1982.\u00a0 He is the father of five children, nine grandchildren, and the husband of one wife Leslie.\u00a0 We heard earlier that before he wrote this book, he didn\u2019t have a clue, not a spiritual clue, what marriage and family were all about according to God\u2019s perspective; but you came up with seven purposes.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, I have the feeling that if I went down to the Call Center right now they would tell me that there were a few phone calls earlier because we didn\u2019t get to what those seven purposes were.\u00a0 So, here at the start of the broadcast, I want you to just share what those seven purposes are that God gave us for marriage.\u00a0 Bob knows I love lists.\u00a0 Okay?\u00a0 What are those seven purposes?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>First, you start with the pattern of the Trinity.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Wait, wait, wait, wait.\u00a0 I know we need to get to the whole list here but people are going, \u201cThe pattern of the Trinity is God\u2019s purpose for marriage?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Right.\u00a0 I call it The Parody Principle.\u00a0 Most of the time when you look at Genesis 1:26-28 where it says, \u201cGod made man in His image.\u00a0 Male and female created He them.\u201d\u00a0 Individuals bypass that as a purpose for marriage.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI see it as a purpose for marriage because when you look at what God is doing\u2014in Chapter 1 He focuses in on the essence of who we are.\u00a0 We are human beings\u2014that is our essence.\u00a0 Then in Chapter 2 He focuses on hierarchy or function.\u00a0 I think we need to start there because He patterned us after the Trinity or the Godhead.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe Bible tells us very clearly that there is one God who manifests Himself in three persons, having the designations:\u00a0 Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.\u00a0 I know this is theology but theology becomes do-ology in just a moment.\u00a0 We know they are equal in essence\u2014they have the divine nature.\u00a0 They have co-essence, co-eternality, co-existence, and co-equality.\u00a0 They are equal.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you would say, \u201cWho raised Jesus from the dead?\u201d\u00a0 John 2:19-21\u2014Jesus did; Gal. 1:1\u2014the Father did; Rom. 1:4\u2014the Holy Spirit did.\u00a0 They are equal in power and attributes.\u00a0 Yet, they have aligned themselves in a hierarchal order for the purpose of our salvation.\u00a0 When there is a hierarchy of function, it is for the purpose of our salvation\u20141 Pet. 1:2.\u00a0 We are the elect according to the foreknowledge of God the Father through sanctification of the Spirit through the sprinkling and obedience of the blood of Jesus Christ.\u00a0 Now there you have it.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod said, \u201cWe made man in our image.\u201d\u00a0 They call it the <em>amagio dei<\/em>.\u00a0 That means that the man and the wife are equal.\u00a0 You never the see the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost fighting over Who is going to have the first-billing.\u00a0 The Bible tells us that the Father exalts the Son; the Son exalts the Father; and the Holy Spirit exalts the Father and the Son.\u00a0 There is our model\u2014right there.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo how does that relate to marriage?\u00a0 The No. 1 reason our marriages are failing is because of pride and selfishness.\u00a0 If we understand that in most marriage relationships it\u2019s kind of like a tick on a dog.\u00a0 You know, a tick is on the dog for what he can get off the dog.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t care what gender the dog is.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t care what breed the dog is\u2014long-hair, short-hair.\u00a0 The tick is on the dog to get off the dog what it can get.\u00a0 The problem in our marriages is that we have two ticks and no dog.\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHere you have this parody\u2014that we are the same in essence.\u00a0 They align themselves into a voluntary submission.\u00a0 Before He gets to hierarchy in Chapter 2\u2014and function\u2014He tells us about essence and equality.\u00a0 There is no superior and inferior in terms of relationship with my wife.\u00a0 My wife is not a doormat; my wife is not a door knob; she is a door prize.\u00a0 Here is the illustration I use all the time.\u00a0 I take...\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Now you are not going to be able to preach on all seven of these or we are going to have to take the next couple of hours from Swindoll...\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>No, no, no.\u00a0 Let him go.\u00a0 This is good.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, see\u2014I\u2019ll finish this one and then we will just run through the list.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>We won\u2019t get to No. 2.\u00a0 I can see it.\u00a0 The handwriting is on the wall.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>So I take two couples, and I set a chair up.\u00a0 I take two passages of Scripture:\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEphesians 5:33, 1 Peter 3:7.\u00a0 It says that the husband is to honor his wife.\u00a0 The etymology of that word means to put on a pedestal.\u00a0 Reverence\u2014it literally means to bow to\u2014same word used for our Lord Jesus Christ.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI say to them, \u201cOkay.\u00a0 You are supposed to have a face-to-face fellowship; but if you submit in the way we hear it, you bow to him, reverence him\u2014you don\u2019t have a face-to-face.\u00a0 If the man\u2014who is the thermostat in the relationship\u2014the woman is the thermometer\u2014the man is the initiator\u2014the woman is the responder.\u00a0 We are to love our wives like Christ loved the Church.\u00a0 You need to go first.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFollow the etymology of that word\u2014I have him put her on a pedestal.\u00a0 I say, \u201cYou still can\u2019t have a face-to-face until what?\u00a0 She bows.\u201d\u00a0 That is the picture of The Parody Principle based on the pattern of the Trinity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I know you asked for the whole list of seven, but I just have to stop and get\u2014because I think folks are thinking, \u201cThe Trinity in my marriage?\u00a0 What is the relationship?\u201d\u00a0 I think you have made it really clear.\u00a0 God has given us a great picture in marriage of something we just get a glimpse of about His own nature\u2014right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Right.\u00a0 So if your wife is more important than you are, then you have no problem whatsoever because the four words for love:\u00a0 you have <em>agape<\/em>; you have <em>phileo<\/em>; then <em>storge<\/em>; then <em>eros<\/em>.\u00a0 You need all four in marriage.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>Eros<\/em> is sensual, <em>storge<\/em> is spousal, <em>phileo<\/em> is social, and <em>agape<\/em> is spiritual\u2014that is the highest.\u00a0 Let me tell how this fleshes out.\u00a0 Because my wife has been ill for 20 years, I have had to do most of the cooking, most of the cleaning.\u00a0 She asked me around year 8 or 9\u2014she said, \u201cAre you tired of this?\u00a0 I know you are ready to \u2018throw in the towel\u2019 and be done with this.\u201d\u00a0 I said to her, \u201cSometimes I get tired in it but I don\u2019t get tired of it.\u201d\u00a0 It is that principle that keeps me going.\u00a0 It is that principle that says, \u201cListen, you are not in this relationship to get.\u00a0 You made a vow: \u2018in sickness and health, in poverty and wealth, until death do us part\u2019\u2014not until debt do us part\u201d\u2014\u00a0 that kind of commitment.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAre there times as in the vernacular of the African-American community, \u201cI\u2019m not feeling it\u201d?\u00a0 Of course there are.\u00a0 Are there times when I am tired in it?\u00a0 Of course there are.\u00a0 Here\u2019s what Adrian Rogers says\u2014he used to say all the time\u2014\u201cLove in marriage doesn\u2019t lead you to commitment; commitment in marriage leads you to love.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis and Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I say, \u201cListen, I am committed to you.\u00a0 I am so committed to you\u2014if you ever leave me, I am going with you.\u201d\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 We got into an argument one time, Bob.\u00a0 She grabbed her suitcase, and she said, \u201cI\u2019m leaving.\u201d\u00a0 I grabbed my suitcase, and I said, \u201cI\u2019m leaving, too.\u00a0 Where are we going?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Where are we going?\u00a0 There you go.\u00a0 I want to see if I have this first purpose for marriage, and then I do want you real quickly to run through the other six.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I am in agreement with you, by the way.\u00a0 If you don\u2019t start here right, you are not going to end up in the right destination.\u00a0 What you are saying here about reflecting the pattern of the Trinity:\u00a0 Ultimately, your marriage is not about you.\u00a0 It is about God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That is right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>It is about reflecting Him and His purposes for planet Earth.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That is right.\u00a0 That is right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You are not ever going to reflect Who God is and what He is up to if it is all about serving yourself\u2014back to your point about two ticks looking for a dog.\u00a0 Marriage has a noble purpose that is not about us.\u00a0 It is about reflecting the character of God to our generation.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Amen.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Alright.\u00a0 Let\u2019s go to the second through the seventh of the purposes of marriage.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Okay.\u00a0 The second is The Partnership Principle.\u00a0 The third is The Perfection Principle.\u00a0 Then there is The Purity Principle.\u00a0 Then there is The Pleasure Principle.\u00a0 Then there is The Procreation Principle.\u00a0 Then there is The Picture of Christ and the Church Principle.\u00a0 Those are the seven.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Okay.\u00a0 Now you are going to unpack some of those.\u00a0 You said the second one was the Partnership Principle?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>The Partnership Principle.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That God gives us to one another so that we can be partners.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That is right.\u00a0 That is right.\u00a0 He creates Adam.\u00a0 He gives us the essence in Chapter 1.\u00a0 Then in Chapter 2, in the Semitic way of writing, He breaks down now.\u00a0 He gives you a general term, and then He breaks it down.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod created man, and then this is the progression of it:\u00a0 In Genesis 2:15 He puts him in the garden.\u00a0 God gives him the place.\u00a0 God picks out his career.\u00a0 Then He gives him two things.\u00a0 He says, \u201cI put him in the garden to till it and to keep it.\u201d\u00a0 To till it\u2014he is a gardener.\u00a0 To keep it\u2014he is a guardian.\u00a0 God establishes him as a protector and a provider for the family.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe gives him three things.\u00a0 They all start with \u201cW.\u201d\u00a0 I tell every single person that this is what you need to look for.\u00a0 First, He gives him work.\u00a0 As a pastor in 27 years of ministry, I never married a couple where the man doesn\u2019t have a job because that is the first thing God gave Adam.\u00a0 I tell them, \u201cEvery man needs to have some \u2018sha-na-na theology\u2019.\u00a0 Sha-na-na-na-na-na.\u00a0 Get a job!\u00a0 Sha-na-na-na-na-na.\u00a0 Get a job!\u00a0 Sha-na-na-na-na-na.\u00a0 Get a job!\u201d\u00a0 The second thing in verses 16-17...\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Would you like Bob to sing that for you?\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 He can sing it\u2014trust me!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>(Sounds from the song)\u00a0 Get a job!\u00a0 (laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I got it, baby!\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 Thank you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I told you he knew it!\u00a0 (laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Then He gives him this word in verses 16 and 17.\u00a0 Then He gives him a wife verse 18.\u00a0 It says, \u201cIt is not good that man should be alone.\u201d\u00a0 How could He say he is alone when God was there?\u00a0 Because, it is obvious that there is something that God wants him to have that He is not going to supply himself.\u00a0 How does He make him aware of the fact that he doesn\u2019t have anybody?\u00a0 He has him name all the animals. He says, \u201cHere is Mr. Giraffe.\u00a0 Mrs. Giraffe.\u00a0 Mr. Hippopotamus.\u00a0 Mrs. Hippopotamus.\u00a0 Mr. Gorilla.\u00a0\u00a0 Mrs. Gorilla.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe knows there is nothing in those woods that is for him.\u00a0 It says, \u201cFor Adam there was not found a helpmeet.\u201d\u2014which means he was looking.\u00a0 He is wondering, \u201cWhere is my counterpart?\u201d\u00a0 Then God performs divine surgery\u2014puts him to sleep; takes a piece of him.\u00a0 As one preacher says, \u201cHe is half the man he used to be.\u201d\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 God forms the woman.\u00a0 I like those words because it fashions the man.\u00a0 <em>Atsay<\/em> just fashions, but then it says He <em>yatsah<\/em>\u2014He shapes the woman\u2014Amen!\u00a0 She corresponds with the man.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Okay.\u00a0 I am going to stop you right there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You have been married to Leslie for over 39 years.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>How is she shaped for you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Oh.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>As a husband?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Oh.\u00a0 She fits.\u00a0 Oh.\u00a0 I\u2019ll show you how she is my partner.\u00a0 I am a muser.\u00a0 It takes me time to contemplate.\u00a0 She is very quick on her feet.\u00a0 (Snap fingers)\u00a0 I used to rebel against that only to have to come back and hear, \u201cI told you so.\u201d\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 Now I am a wiser man because I understand she is my complement.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI share things with her.\u00a0 I ask her opinion.\u00a0 He coupled me with her for a purpose.\u00a0 She is introverted.\u00a0 I am extraverted.\u00a0 I know you don\u2019t believe that.\u00a0 Sometimes she will say, \u201cYou are getting out there too far now.\u00a0 Come on now.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Come on back.\u00a0 (laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 Sometimes I say, \u201cCome off the wall now.\u00a0 You don\u2019t want people to think that you are not friendly.\u201d\u00a0 I rise early.\u00a0 Generally, I am up at 4:30 in the morning.\u00a0 She gets up about (muffled time) in the morning.\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 Of course, I make the money and she spends it.\u00a0 We complement each other.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 There you go!\u00a0 (laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>So The Partnership Principle is really about God filling in the gaps.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>What is lacking in our lives\u2014He gives us one another to fill in those gaps.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 And the tragedy is many of us rebel against that, especially as husbands, we rebel against that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 You know, I look at this list.\u00a0 I know we should wait to talk about this a little later; but when I was reading through your book, the one I really\u2014I\u2019ve found interesting because I don\u2019t think I have heard anyone refer to this\u2014that one of the purposes of marriage is for pleasure.\u00a0 That God created marriage so a man and a woman could enjoy one another.\u00a0 I know immediately our audience is running to sex, but you really define it more than just sexual pleasure.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Oh, yes.\u00a0 Oh, yes.\u00a0 The whole area of intimacy.\u00a0 I think it was H. Norman Wright who came up with the 12 areas of intimacy.\u00a0 How are we on crisis intimacy?\u00a0 How are we on creative intimacy?\u00a0 I think it is all rolled up into one big romance kind-of-deal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You are talking about an intimacy that links together, not just body and body, but that links soul and soul\u2014that really makes you lovers in a full sense.\u00a0 Right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That is right.\u00a0 That is right.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You talk about your mission as well\u2014how you share a mission\u2014a common mission together in leading a church there in south Chicago.\u00a0 Right?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Right.\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 When you look at the whole concept of what God has done as He has linked us together, He knows what I need in order to balance me and He knows what she needs in order to balance her.\u00a0 The Bible says, \u201cLove covers a multitude of sin.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEven as I was talking about earlier\u2014take crisis intimacy.\u00a0 We have been through some tough crises.\u00a0 My wife has had three nervous breakdowns.\u00a0 All the way through that the Lord has sustained her and has used me at times to be an encouragement and strength to her.\u00a0 I think that God knows what He is doing when He gave me to her.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>What is the most important lesson as a man who is called to nourish and cherish his wife you have learned in the midst of your wife facing repeated health issues and also some emotional crises?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I would say it is just being there for her.\u00a0 Being there\u2014being a support\u2014being a help\u2014leading her in her spiritual quest for comprehension.\u00a0 There have been times when we had this\u2014we wrote this in our journal.\u00a0 We were talking about how we felt.\u00a0 I was sharing with her, writing in my journal, that the Lord has taught me that no matter how tight our relationship is, I cannot ever take His place in your life.\u00a0 She wrote in her journal practically the same thing\u2014that the Lord is allowing me to go through this so that I would know that I can never put you in front of Him.\u00a0 It has really been a kind of thing that is balancing us out in our spiritual walk so that we are continually looking to the purposes that the Lord has for us in the midst of this.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy wife has, for example, turned her sickness into a ministry.\u00a0 She will call individuals who are sick in our assembly; and they say, \u201cYou are sick yourself.\u00a0 How are you doing?\u201d\u00a0 She will say, \u201cNo.\u00a0 Don\u2019t talk about me.\u00a0 I called to encourage you and to let you know that God is still on the throne no matter how much you are going through.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>The thing I like about what you have written here, James, is you have lifted marriage out of the human side\u2014just of making marriage two bodies merging together and attempting to go the distance for a lifetime.\u00a0 You lifted it and given it its spiritual imprint that the Scriptures give it.\u00a0 You have reminded us why God created marriage in the first place.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tUnderstanding the purposes of something really help determine its function, practically speaking.\u00a0 If you don\u2019t have the purposes down, you are not going to practice what needs to occur day-in and day-out in your marriage.\u00a0 What you have done here, I think, has lifted it out of\u00a0 the \u201cmuck and mire\u201d of everyday life.\u00a0 You have reminded us of what was on God\u2019s heart in the first place.\u00a0 I really appreciate your doing that.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I think, Dennis, of a number of couples\u2014and we meet them all of the time\u2014couples who have been married for a long time.\u00a0 They are experiencing some challenges in their marriage; they are not sure why.\u00a0 You sit down with them and you find out they really don\u2019t have a solid biblical framework for marriage.\u00a0 Nobody has ever sat down and explained to them what the Bible teaches about relationships, what the Bible teaches about God\u2019s purpose for marriage\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\twhat you have written about in your book, Pastor Ford.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBy the way, we have the book in our FamilyLife Today Resource Center.\u00a0 Our listeners can go to FamilyLifeToday.com to get a copy.\u00a0 Either order online from us or call 1-800-FL-TODAY to request a copy.\u00a0 1-800-358-6329 or, again, our online address is FamiyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 Get a copy of Pastor James Ford\u2019s book <em>The Seven Reasons Why God Created Marriage<\/em>.\u00a0 It will help you understand God\u2019s purposes for marriage.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOr make plans to join us at one of our upcoming FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae Marriage Getaways where we unpack God\u2019s purpose for marriage, and God\u2019s plan for marriage, and issues like communication and intimacy, and \u201cWhat is your role in the marriage?\u201d, \u201cWhat is my role in the marriage?\u201d\u00a0 All of that\u2014it is addressed at the Weekend to Remember\u00ae marriage getaway.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt is the best thing I know of that a couple can do for their marriage.\u00a0 It is immersive; it is comprehensive; and it is a whole lot of fun.\u00a0 It is a great weekend getaway for a couple.\u00a0 Go online to find out more at FamilyLifeToday.com or call if you have any questions about our upcoming fall season of FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae marriage getaways.\u00a0 Our toll free number:\u00a0 1-800-FL-TODAY.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSpeaking of a FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae marriage getaway, we have a lot of folks who are going to be attending this fall as our guests.\u00a0 This month we have been asking our listeners, those of you have been tuned in for a long time but who have never gotten in touch with us, to make a donation.\u00a0 We have been asking if you would consider making a donation\u2014letting us know that you are tuned in and helping to support the ministry.\u00a0 We have set a goal at 2,500 new donors to the ministry this month.\u00a0 We have been keeping tabs of that on our website of FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe made a special offer to new donors.\u00a0 If you could make a donation of $100 or more this month, we want to send you a certificate so you and your spouse could attend one of these upcoming marriage getaways.\u00a0 We have been able to do that for a lot of couples.\u00a0 Looking forward to seeing you at one of these getaways this fall.\u00a0 It will be a great weekend for you and your spouse.\u00a0 We not only appreciate your support of the ministry, but we hope you enjoy the weekend away.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe offer is still good through the end of the month.\u00a0 If you are a new donor to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> and you are able to make a donation of $100 or more, we can send you a certificate so you can attend an upcoming FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae marriage getaway.\u00a0 Make your donation online at FamilyLifeToday.com or call 1-800-FL-TODAY to make a donation.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you can help with a donation of any amount this month, whether you are a new donor or somebody who has made a donation in the past, we would like to say, \u201cThank you,\u201d to you by sending you a two-CD series with our friends Tim and Joy Downs dealing with the issue of conflict in marriage and what are the causes of some of the most common conflicts in marriage.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you make a donation online and you would like to receive the CDs, type the word \u201cSEVEN\u201d in the key code box so that we know to send you the CDs; or simply call 1-800-FL-TODAY.\u00a0 Make your donation over the phone and mention that you would like the CDs on conflict.\u00a0 Again, let me just say how much we appreciate all of you for your financial support of this ministry.\u00a0 It is always great to hear from you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to encourage you to be back with us tomorrow.\u00a0 Pastor James Ford will be here again.\u00a0 We are going to continue looking at God\u2019s design for the marriage relationship\u2014what was His intent in the first place so we can better understand our purpose in all of this.\u00a0 I hope you can tune in for that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today Keith Lynch and our entire broadcast production team on behalf of our host Dennis Rainey; I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts for you. However, there is a cost to transcribe, create, and produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>www.FamilyLife.com<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["23.06M"],"filesize_raw":["24178642"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-302099.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-302099.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f 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you been clueless about marriage?","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-08-26.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>The number 1 reason why our marriages are failing is because of pride and selfishness.\u00a0 In most marriage relationships it\u2019s kind of like a tick on a dog.\u00a0 You know, a tick is on the dog for what he can get off the dog.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t care what gender the dog is.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t care what breed the dog is\u2014long-hair, short-hair.\u00a0 The tick is on the dog to get off the dog what it can get.\u00a0 The problem in our marriages is that we have two ticks and no dog.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Thursday, August 26th.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 Pastor James Ford joins us today to give us some straight talk on what makes a marriage work.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWelcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>; thanks for joining us.\u00a0 You know, at our FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae marriage getaways that we do with couples, we start off on Friday night talking about the things that threaten the marriage relationship.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I remember you had a conversation at one point with an African American pastor.\u00a0 You were telling him about the Weekend to Remember\u00ae.\u00a0 He said that if you were doing the conference with an African American audience rather than starting with the things that threaten the marriage relationship you really would have to start with why there ought to be a marriage relationship in the first place. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Right.\u00a0 And he is just speaking about how in his community the breakdown of the family was so radical that we needed to take a step further back and just define marriage and family around God\u2019s purposes.\u00a0 Fortunately we have an expert with us from south Chicago, a pastor.\u00a0 You don\u2019t need to look around for someone else in the studio!\u00a0 It\u2019s you, James.\u00a0 James Ford joins us once again on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You said, \u201cExpert.\u201d\u00a0 You threw me off.\u00a0 (laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Welcome to the broadcast, James.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Oh, it is good to be here.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>James is the senior pastor of Christ Bible Church, formerly South Shore Baptist Church in Chicago.\u00a0 He has been there since 1982.\u00a0 He is the father of five children, nine grandchildren, and the husband of one wife Leslie.\u00a0 We heard earlier that before he wrote this book, he didn\u2019t have a clue, not a spiritual clue, what marriage and family were all about according to God\u2019s perspective; but you came up with seven purposes.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, I have the feeling that if I went down to the Call Center right now they would tell me that there were a few phone calls earlier because we didn\u2019t get to what those seven purposes were.\u00a0 So, here at the start of the broadcast, I want you to just share what those seven purposes are that God gave us for marriage.\u00a0 Bob knows I love lists.\u00a0 Okay?\u00a0 What are those seven purposes?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>First, you start with the pattern of the Trinity.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Wait, wait, wait, wait.\u00a0 I know we need to get to the whole list here but people are going, \u201cThe pattern of the Trinity is God\u2019s purpose for marriage?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Right.\u00a0 I call it The Parody Principle.\u00a0 Most of the time when you look at Genesis 1:26-28 where it says, \u201cGod made man in His image.\u00a0 Male and female created He them.\u201d\u00a0 Individuals bypass that as a purpose for marriage.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI see it as a purpose for marriage because when you look at what God is doing\u2014in Chapter 1 He focuses in on the essence of who we are.\u00a0 We are human beings\u2014that is our essence.\u00a0 Then in Chapter 2 He focuses on hierarchy or function.\u00a0 I think we need to start there because He patterned us after the Trinity or the Godhead.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe Bible tells us very clearly that there is one God who manifests Himself in three persons, having the designations:\u00a0 Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.\u00a0 I know this is theology but theology becomes do-ology in just a moment.\u00a0 We know they are equal in essence\u2014they have the divine nature.\u00a0 They have co-essence, co-eternality, co-existence, and co-equality.\u00a0 They are equal.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you would say, \u201cWho raised Jesus from the dead?\u201d\u00a0 John 2:19-21\u2014Jesus did; Gal. 1:1\u2014the Father did; Rom. 1:4\u2014the Holy Spirit did.\u00a0 They are equal in power and attributes.\u00a0 Yet, they have aligned themselves in a hierarchal order for the purpose of our salvation.\u00a0 When there is a hierarchy of function, it is for the purpose of our salvation\u20141 Pet. 1:2.\u00a0 We are the elect according to the foreknowledge of God the Father through sanctification of the Spirit through the sprinkling and obedience of the blood of Jesus Christ.\u00a0 Now there you have it.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod said, \u201cWe made man in our image.\u201d\u00a0 They call it the <em>amagio dei<\/em>.\u00a0 That means that the man and the wife are equal.\u00a0 You never the see the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost fighting over Who is going to have the first-billing.\u00a0 The Bible tells us that the Father exalts the Son; the Son exalts the Father; and the Holy Spirit exalts the Father and the Son.\u00a0 There is our model\u2014right there.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo how does that relate to marriage?\u00a0 The No. 1 reason our marriages are failing is because of pride and selfishness.\u00a0 If we understand that in most marriage relationships it\u2019s kind of like a tick on a dog.\u00a0 You know, a tick is on the dog for what he can get off the dog.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t care what gender the dog is.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t care what breed the dog is\u2014long-hair, short-hair.\u00a0 The tick is on the dog to get off the dog what it can get.\u00a0 The problem in our marriages is that we have two ticks and no dog.\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHere you have this parody\u2014that we are the same in essence.\u00a0 They align themselves into a voluntary submission.\u00a0 Before He gets to hierarchy in Chapter 2\u2014and function\u2014He tells us about essence and equality.\u00a0 There is no superior and inferior in terms of relationship with my wife.\u00a0 My wife is not a doormat; my wife is not a door knob; she is a door prize.\u00a0 Here is the illustration I use all the time.\u00a0 I take...\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Now you are not going to be able to preach on all seven of these or we are going to have to take the next couple of hours from Swindoll...\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>No, no, no.\u00a0 Let him go.\u00a0 This is good.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, see\u2014I\u2019ll finish this one and then we will just run through the list.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>We won\u2019t get to No. 2.\u00a0 I can see it.\u00a0 The handwriting is on the wall.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>So I take two couples, and I set a chair up.\u00a0 I take two passages of Scripture:\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEphesians 5:33, 1 Peter 3:7.\u00a0 It says that the husband is to honor his wife.\u00a0 The etymology of that word means to put on a pedestal.\u00a0 Reverence\u2014it literally means to bow to\u2014same word used for our Lord Jesus Christ.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI say to them, \u201cOkay.\u00a0 You are supposed to have a face-to-face fellowship; but if you submit in the way we hear it, you bow to him, reverence him\u2014you don\u2019t have a face-to-face.\u00a0 If the man\u2014who is the thermostat in the relationship\u2014the woman is the thermometer\u2014the man is the initiator\u2014the woman is the responder.\u00a0 We are to love our wives like Christ loved the Church.\u00a0 You need to go first.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFollow the etymology of that word\u2014I have him put her on a pedestal.\u00a0 I say, \u201cYou still can\u2019t have a face-to-face until what?\u00a0 She bows.\u201d\u00a0 That is the picture of The Parody Principle based on the pattern of the Trinity.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I know you asked for the whole list of seven, but I just have to stop and get\u2014because I think folks are thinking, \u201cThe Trinity in my marriage?\u00a0 What is the relationship?\u201d\u00a0 I think you have made it really clear.\u00a0 God has given us a great picture in marriage of something we just get a glimpse of about His own nature\u2014right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Right.\u00a0 So if your wife is more important than you are, then you have no problem whatsoever because the four words for love:\u00a0 you have <em>agape<\/em>; you have <em>phileo<\/em>; then <em>storge<\/em>; then <em>eros<\/em>.\u00a0 You need all four in marriage.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>Eros<\/em> is sensual, <em>storge<\/em> is spousal, <em>phileo<\/em> is social, and <em>agape<\/em> is spiritual\u2014that is the highest.\u00a0 Let me tell how this fleshes out.\u00a0 Because my wife has been ill for 20 years, I have had to do most of the cooking, most of the cleaning.\u00a0 She asked me around year 8 or 9\u2014she said, \u201cAre you tired of this?\u00a0 I know you are ready to \u2018throw in the towel\u2019 and be done with this.\u201d\u00a0 I said to her, \u201cSometimes I get tired in it but I don\u2019t get tired of it.\u201d\u00a0 It is that principle that keeps me going.\u00a0 It is that principle that says, \u201cListen, you are not in this relationship to get.\u00a0 You made a vow: \u2018in sickness and health, in poverty and wealth, until death do us part\u2019\u2014not until debt do us part\u201d\u2014\u00a0 that kind of commitment.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAre there times as in the vernacular of the African-American community, \u201cI\u2019m not feeling it\u201d?\u00a0 Of course there are.\u00a0 Are there times when I am tired in it?\u00a0 Of course there are.\u00a0 Here\u2019s what Adrian Rogers says\u2014he used to say all the time\u2014\u201cLove in marriage doesn\u2019t lead you to commitment; commitment in marriage leads you to love.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis and Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I say, \u201cListen, I am committed to you.\u00a0 I am so committed to you\u2014if you ever leave me, I am going with you.\u201d\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 We got into an argument one time, Bob.\u00a0 She grabbed her suitcase, and she said, \u201cI\u2019m leaving.\u201d\u00a0 I grabbed my suitcase, and I said, \u201cI\u2019m leaving, too.\u00a0 Where are we going?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Where are we going?\u00a0 There you go.\u00a0 I want to see if I have this first purpose for marriage, and then I do want you real quickly to run through the other six.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I am in agreement with you, by the way.\u00a0 If you don\u2019t start here right, you are not going to end up in the right destination.\u00a0 What you are saying here about reflecting the pattern of the Trinity:\u00a0 Ultimately, your marriage is not about you.\u00a0 It is about God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That is right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>It is about reflecting Him and His purposes for planet Earth.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That is right.\u00a0 That is right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You are not ever going to reflect Who God is and what He is up to if it is all about serving yourself\u2014back to your point about two ticks looking for a dog.\u00a0 Marriage has a noble purpose that is not about us.\u00a0 It is about reflecting the character of God to our generation.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Amen.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Alright.\u00a0 Let\u2019s go to the second through the seventh of the purposes of marriage.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Okay.\u00a0 The second is The Partnership Principle.\u00a0 The third is The Perfection Principle.\u00a0 Then there is The Purity Principle.\u00a0 Then there is The Pleasure Principle.\u00a0 Then there is The Procreation Principle.\u00a0 Then there is The Picture of Christ and the Church Principle.\u00a0 Those are the seven.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Okay.\u00a0 Now you are going to unpack some of those.\u00a0 You said the second one was the Partnership Principle?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>The Partnership Principle.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That God gives us to one another so that we can be partners.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That is right.\u00a0 That is right.\u00a0 He creates Adam.\u00a0 He gives us the essence in Chapter 1.\u00a0 Then in Chapter 2, in the Semitic way of writing, He breaks down now.\u00a0 He gives you a general term, and then He breaks it down.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod created man, and then this is the progression of it:\u00a0 In Genesis 2:15 He puts him in the garden.\u00a0 God gives him the place.\u00a0 God picks out his career.\u00a0 Then He gives him two things.\u00a0 He says, \u201cI put him in the garden to till it and to keep it.\u201d\u00a0 To till it\u2014he is a gardener.\u00a0 To keep it\u2014he is a guardian.\u00a0 God establishes him as a protector and a provider for the family.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe gives him three things.\u00a0 They all start with \u201cW.\u201d\u00a0 I tell every single person that this is what you need to look for.\u00a0 First, He gives him work.\u00a0 As a pastor in 27 years of ministry, I never married a couple where the man doesn\u2019t have a job because that is the first thing God gave Adam.\u00a0 I tell them, \u201cEvery man needs to have some \u2018sha-na-na theology\u2019.\u00a0 Sha-na-na-na-na-na.\u00a0 Get a job!\u00a0 Sha-na-na-na-na-na.\u00a0 Get a job!\u00a0 Sha-na-na-na-na-na.\u00a0 Get a job!\u201d\u00a0 The second thing in verses 16-17...\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Would you like Bob to sing that for you?\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 He can sing it\u2014trust me!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>(Sounds from the song)\u00a0 Get a job!\u00a0 (laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I got it, baby!\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 Thank you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I told you he knew it!\u00a0 (laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Then He gives him this word in verses 16 and 17.\u00a0 Then He gives him a wife verse 18.\u00a0 It says, \u201cIt is not good that man should be alone.\u201d\u00a0 How could He say he is alone when God was there?\u00a0 Because, it is obvious that there is something that God wants him to have that He is not going to supply himself.\u00a0 How does He make him aware of the fact that he doesn\u2019t have anybody?\u00a0 He has him name all the animals. He says, \u201cHere is Mr. Giraffe.\u00a0 Mrs. Giraffe.\u00a0 Mr. Hippopotamus.\u00a0 Mrs. Hippopotamus.\u00a0 Mr. Gorilla.\u00a0\u00a0 Mrs. Gorilla.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe knows there is nothing in those woods that is for him.\u00a0 It says, \u201cFor Adam there was not found a helpmeet.\u201d\u2014which means he was looking.\u00a0 He is wondering, \u201cWhere is my counterpart?\u201d\u00a0 Then God performs divine surgery\u2014puts him to sleep; takes a piece of him.\u00a0 As one preacher says, \u201cHe is half the man he used to be.\u201d\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 God forms the woman.\u00a0 I like those words because it fashions the man.\u00a0 <em>Atsay<\/em> just fashions, but then it says He <em>yatsah<\/em>\u2014He shapes the woman\u2014Amen!\u00a0 She corresponds with the man.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Okay.\u00a0 I am going to stop you right there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You have been married to Leslie for over 39 years.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>How is she shaped for you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Oh.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>As a husband?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Oh.\u00a0 She fits.\u00a0 Oh.\u00a0 I\u2019ll show you how she is my partner.\u00a0 I am a muser.\u00a0 It takes me time to contemplate.\u00a0 She is very quick on her feet.\u00a0 (Snap fingers)\u00a0 I used to rebel against that only to have to come back and hear, \u201cI told you so.\u201d\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 Now I am a wiser man because I understand she is my complement.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI share things with her.\u00a0 I ask her opinion.\u00a0 He coupled me with her for a purpose.\u00a0 She is introverted.\u00a0 I am extraverted.\u00a0 I know you don\u2019t believe that.\u00a0 Sometimes she will say, \u201cYou are getting out there too far now.\u00a0 Come on now.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Come on back.\u00a0 (laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 Sometimes I say, \u201cCome off the wall now.\u00a0 You don\u2019t want people to think that you are not friendly.\u201d\u00a0 I rise early.\u00a0 Generally, I am up at 4:30 in the morning.\u00a0 She gets up about (muffled time) in the morning.\u00a0 (laughter)\u00a0 Of course, I make the money and she spends it.\u00a0 We complement each other.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 There you go!\u00a0 (laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>So The Partnership Principle is really about God filling in the gaps.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>What is lacking in our lives\u2014He gives us one another to fill in those gaps.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 And the tragedy is many of us rebel against that, especially as husbands, we rebel against that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 You know, I look at this list.\u00a0 I know we should wait to talk about this a little later; but when I was reading through your book, the one I really\u2014I\u2019ve found interesting because I don\u2019t think I have heard anyone refer to this\u2014that one of the purposes of marriage is for pleasure.\u00a0 That God created marriage so a man and a woman could enjoy one another.\u00a0 I know immediately our audience is running to sex, but you really define it more than just sexual pleasure.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Oh, yes.\u00a0 Oh, yes.\u00a0 The whole area of intimacy.\u00a0 I think it was H. Norman Wright who came up with the 12 areas of intimacy.\u00a0 How are we on crisis intimacy?\u00a0 How are we on creative intimacy?\u00a0 I think it is all rolled up into one big romance kind-of-deal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You are talking about an intimacy that links together, not just body and body, but that links soul and soul\u2014that really makes you lovers in a full sense.\u00a0 Right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That is right.\u00a0 That is right.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You talk about your mission as well\u2014how you share a mission\u2014a common mission together in leading a church there in south Chicago.\u00a0 Right?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Right.\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 When you look at the whole concept of what God has done as He has linked us together, He knows what I need in order to balance me and He knows what she needs in order to balance her.\u00a0 The Bible says, \u201cLove covers a multitude of sin.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEven as I was talking about earlier\u2014take crisis intimacy.\u00a0 We have been through some tough crises.\u00a0 My wife has had three nervous breakdowns.\u00a0 All the way through that the Lord has sustained her and has used me at times to be an encouragement and strength to her.\u00a0 I think that God knows what He is doing when He gave me to her.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>What is the most important lesson as a man who is called to nourish and cherish his wife you have learned in the midst of your wife facing repeated health issues and also some emotional crises?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>James:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I would say it is just being there for her.\u00a0 Being there\u2014being a support\u2014being a help\u2014leading her in her spiritual quest for comprehension.\u00a0 There have been times when we had this\u2014we wrote this in our journal.\u00a0 We were talking about how we felt.\u00a0 I was sharing with her, writing in my journal, that the Lord has taught me that no matter how tight our relationship is, I cannot ever take His place in your life.\u00a0 She wrote in her journal practically the same thing\u2014that the Lord is allowing me to go through this so that I would know that I can never put you in front of Him.\u00a0 It has really been a kind of thing that is balancing us out in our spiritual walk so that we are continually looking to the purposes that the Lord has for us in the midst of this.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy wife has, for example, turned her sickness into a ministry.\u00a0 She will call individuals who are sick in our assembly; and they say, \u201cYou are sick yourself.\u00a0 How are you doing?\u201d\u00a0 She will say, \u201cNo.\u00a0 Don\u2019t talk about me.\u00a0 I called to encourage you and to let you know that God is still on the throne no matter how much you are going through.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>The thing I like about what you have written here, James, is you have lifted marriage out of the human side\u2014just of making marriage two bodies merging together and attempting to go the distance for a lifetime.\u00a0 You lifted it and given it its spiritual imprint that the Scriptures give it.\u00a0 You have reminded us why God created marriage in the first place.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tUnderstanding the purposes of something really help determine its function, practically speaking.\u00a0 If you don\u2019t have the purposes down, you are not going to practice what needs to occur day-in and day-out in your marriage.\u00a0 What you have done here, I think, has lifted it out of\u00a0 the \u201cmuck and mire\u201d of everyday life.\u00a0 You have reminded us of what was on God\u2019s heart in the first place.\u00a0 I really appreciate your doing that.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I think, Dennis, of a number of couples\u2014and we meet them all of the time\u2014couples who have been married for a long time.\u00a0 They are experiencing some challenges in their marriage; they are not sure why.\u00a0 You sit down with them and you find out they really don\u2019t have a solid biblical framework for marriage.\u00a0 Nobody has ever sat down and explained to them what the Bible teaches about relationships, what the Bible teaches about God\u2019s purpose for marriage\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\twhat you have written about in your book, Pastor Ford.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBy the way, we have the book in our FamilyLife Today Resource Center.\u00a0 Our listeners can go to FamilyLifeToday.com to get a copy.\u00a0 Either order online from us or call 1-800-FL-TODAY to request a copy.\u00a0 1-800-358-6329 or, again, our online address is FamiyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 Get a copy of Pastor James Ford\u2019s book <em>The Seven Reasons Why God Created Marriage<\/em>.\u00a0 It will help you understand God\u2019s purposes for marriage.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOr make plans to join us at one of our upcoming FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae Marriage Getaways where we unpack God\u2019s purpose for marriage, and God\u2019s plan for marriage, and issues like communication and intimacy, and \u201cWhat is your role in the marriage?\u201d, \u201cWhat is my role in the marriage?\u201d\u00a0 All of that\u2014it is addressed at the Weekend to Remember\u00ae marriage getaway.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt is the best thing I know of that a couple can do for their marriage.\u00a0 It is immersive; it is comprehensive; and it is a whole lot of fun.\u00a0 It is a great weekend getaway for a couple.\u00a0 Go online to find out more at FamilyLifeToday.com or call if you have any questions about our upcoming fall season of FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae marriage getaways.\u00a0 Our toll free number:\u00a0 1-800-FL-TODAY.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSpeaking of a FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae marriage getaway, we have a lot of folks who are going to be attending this fall as our guests.\u00a0 This month we have been asking our listeners, those of you have been tuned in for a long time but who have never gotten in touch with us, to make a donation.\u00a0 We have been asking if you would consider making a donation\u2014letting us know that you are tuned in and helping to support the ministry.\u00a0 We have set a goal at 2,500 new donors to the ministry this month.\u00a0 We have been keeping tabs of that on our website of FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe made a special offer to new donors.\u00a0 If you could make a donation of $100 or more this month, we want to send you a certificate so you and your spouse could attend one of these upcoming marriage getaways.\u00a0 We have been able to do that for a lot of couples.\u00a0 Looking forward to seeing you at one of these getaways this fall.\u00a0 It will be a great weekend for you and your spouse.\u00a0 We not only appreciate your support of the ministry, but we hope you enjoy the weekend away.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe offer is still good through the end of the month.\u00a0 If you are a new donor to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> and you are able to make a donation of $100 or more, we can send you a certificate so you can attend an upcoming FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae marriage getaway.\u00a0 Make your donation online at FamilyLifeToday.com or call 1-800-FL-TODAY to make a donation.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you can help with a donation of any amount this month, whether you are a new donor or somebody who has made a donation in the past, we would like to say, \u201cThank you,\u201d to you by sending you a two-CD series with our friends Tim and Joy Downs dealing with the issue of conflict in marriage and what are the causes of some of the most common conflicts in marriage.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you make a donation online and you would like to receive the CDs, type the word \u201cSEVEN\u201d in the key code box so that we know to send you the CDs; or simply call 1-800-FL-TODAY.\u00a0 Make your donation over the phone and mention that you would like the CDs on conflict.\u00a0 Again, let me just say how much we appreciate all of you for your financial support of this ministry.\u00a0 It is always great to hear from you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to encourage you to be back with us tomorrow.\u00a0 Pastor James Ford will be here again.\u00a0 We are going to continue looking at God\u2019s design for the marriage relationship\u2014what was His intent in the first place so we can better understand our purpose in all of this.\u00a0 I hope you can tune in for that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today Keith Lynch and our entire broadcast production team on behalf of our host Dennis Rainey; I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts for you. However, there is a cost to transcribe, create, and produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>www.FamilyLife.com<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/302099","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=302099"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=302099"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=302099"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=302099"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=302099"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=302099"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=302099"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}