{"id":302088,"date":"2010-08-11T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2010-08-11T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/the-power-of-respect\/"},"modified":"2010-08-11T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2010-08-11T15:00:00","slug":"the-power-of-respect","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/the-power-of-respect\/","title":{"rendered":"The Power of Respect"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>This may come as a surprise, but your husband really wants to talk about &#8230; respect!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-08-11.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"33.08M","filesize_raw":"34688529","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2862],"tags":[2916,5156],"podcast_series":[7746],"cwp_profile":[3142],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302088","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-understanding-differences","tag-men","tag-understanding-men","podcast_series-what-husbands-wish-their-wives-knew-about-men","cwp_profile-bob-lepine","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302088\/the-power-of-respect","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302088\/the-power-of-respect","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"yOkJAFJzZc\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/the-power-of-respect\/\">The Power of Respect<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/the-power-of-respect\/embed\/#?secret=yOkJAFJzZc\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;The Power of Respect&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"yOkJAFJzZc\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg",508,508,false]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"kfairris@familylife.com","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/kfairrisfamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"This may come as a surprise, but your husband really wants to talk about ... respect!","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-08-11.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t(Recorded Message) We talk about a man needing respect and affirmation, probably the most powerful way you affirm your husband and show respect to him is when you respond to him sexually.\u00a0 I have said to Mary Ann you can affirm me all day long.\u00a0 You can say you are smart.\u00a0 You are handsome.\u00a0 You are this.\u00a0 How did you do that?\u00a0 That\u2019s great and at night, if I say so you are interested and she goes, oh not tonight.\u00a0 I go, well why were you lying to me all day?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Wednesday August 11<sup>th<\/sup>.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife, Dennis Rainey and I am Bob Lepine.\u00a0 Have you been lying to your husband?\u00a0 We are going to talk about the power of marital intimacy today.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWelcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Wednesday edition.\u00a0 Have you ever done what I have the courage to d?\u00a0 Stand up in front of a room full of more than 500 women? Have you ever spoken to just an audience of women, no men in the room?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know years ago, Bob, this is a great story about FamilyLife, back when we started FamilyLife, we did not have enough money for our wives to accompany us to do the marriage conferences, you know the Weekend to Remember\u00ae marriage getaway.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 This was one of the highlights of the weekend I am convinced for the women, the men speakers did the talk on being a wife.\u00a0 Picture that for a second.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And you did that a few times?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 200 or 300 women in the room.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Just without their husbands.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Without their husbands listening to one of us wax, eloquently around what it means to respect your husband.\u00a0 What it means to submit.\u00a0 So that was a real high point of the weekend.\u00a0 So yes, I have done it, but not recently Bob.\u00a0 I understand you did at the True Woman Conference in Chattanooga, Tennessee.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes back in March this was a breakout session that they had at the conference.\u00a0 I talked about what husbands wish wives understood about men and it was some of the same themes you are talking about, but I tried to do it in a way that --\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well this was different.\u00a0 You were actually setup to do this.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob<\/strong>:\u00a0 That\u2019s true.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis<\/strong>:\u00a0 You know what I mean, they were expecting it.\u00a0 They showed up voluntarily.\u00a0 Well you know what, let's listen to Part 3 of the message you gave to those 500 women about what every man wishes his wife knew about her role and her power in the life of her man.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 We need a cheerleader.\u00a0 We need to know you\u2019re on our team.\u00a0 We need to know you love us and you\u2019re going to stay with us no matter what.\u00a0 We need to know that you want to be a part of the solution if there\u2019s a problem.\u00a0 That you\u2019re cheering us on; that you\u2019re not there to point out what\u2019s wrong, but you want to be a part of the solution. \u201cHow can I help?\u201d We\u2019re back to that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we need to know this.\u00a0 Listen, I\u2019m going to start meddling here.\u00a0 We need to know that you\u2019re not trying to use our relationship as a way to control or manipulate us.\u00a0 What do I mean by that?\u00a0 I mean that I have observed in wives a withdrawal of affection and approval as a way to try to correct a spouse\u2019s behavior.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m going to just withdraw my affection or my approval until you start acting the way I want you to act.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOkay what that is, is Genesis 3 happening in your marriage.\u00a0 When God spoke to the woman He said, your pain in childhood will be greatly increased.\u00a0 Your desire will be for your husband but he must rule over you.\u00a0 That word your desire will be for your husband doesn\u2019t mean you are going to want him and he is all hot, it means you want to be in charge, but he must rule over you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNumber 6, we need you to give us grace and still love us when we make mistakes and fail.\u00a0 In other words, we need you to do for us what God does for you.\u00a0 We need you to give us grace and still love us when we make mistakes and fail because you married somebody who is going to make plenty of mistakes already has.\u00a0 He is going to make more and if your response to his mistakes is to be critical, harsh, judgmental, it will shut him down.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you respond with grace, he will see Christ in you, he will be drawn to the Christ in you, he will grow more into Christlikeness himself as he sees his you modeling grace.\u00a0 That doesn\u2019t mean that you don\u2019t tell the truth, you are to speak the truth in love.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow some of you think, well but if I don\u2019t show him my displeasure, he won't know he did anything wrong.\u00a0 Let me suggest two things related to that.\u00a0 First one is Proverb says, it is a man\u2019s glory to overlook an offense.\u00a0 There are sometimes when your husband will do something and frankly you just need to overlook it.\u00a0 You don\u2019t need to correct everything.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSecondly, Galatians 6:1 is a great verse to tell you.\u00a0 Brothers or I will say sisters here, if you see your husband caught in a sin you who are a spiritual that means you got to be in the right spiritual frame of mind before you go do any correcting.\u00a0 Most of you correct before you get spiritually focused, okay, so you have to get the right frame of mind.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou got to let the Lord\u2026Lord, are there any logs in my eye that I don\u2019t see?\u00a0 Lord, search my heart.\u00a0\u00a0 Know me, try me, see what\u2019s going on.\u00a0 Help me, are there blind spots or anything I need to do.?\u00a0 You need to be prayed up.\u00a0 When it\u2019s the right time to do this?\u00a0 Then you go, you are spiritual, go to restore.\u00a0 What are you going to do?\u00a0 You are going to try to gently restore your husband.\u00a0 Not to shame him, not to tear him down, but to restore him.\u00a0 To put him back where he ought to be to take what was broken and fix it.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tRestore such a one with what kind of a spirit?\u00a0 A spirit of meekness or gentleness.\u00a0 That\u2019s what the scripture has called you to meekness or gentleness.\u00a0 It\u2019s appropriate to go and your husband needs to hear it from you.\u00a0 But there has got to be grace, there has got to be humility in the midst of all of this.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNext, we would rather be respected as men than loved.\u00a0 It's why I believe in Ephesians Chapter 5 and that passage on marriage, the very last verse, \u201cwives, respect your husbands.\u201d\u00a0 If you go well I don\u2019t agree with that, well here is the command of the Lord, \u201cwives, see to it that you respect your husbands.\u201d\u00a0 Some of you go there are things about my husband that just make it hard for me to respect him. Frankly I don\u2019t know your husbands and I don\u2019t know the situations but it\u2019s very possible for me to imagine that in this room there are women who have got husbands who if I met them, I wouldn\u2019t have a lot of respect for them.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut I will never forgive what Elisabeth Elliot shared one time.\u00a0 It was a great illustration.\u00a0 If I were wearing this shirt and I put a pen in this pocket and if that pen had leaked ink, so that there was purple stain, right here on that shirt and you walked up to see me where would your eyes go? They go right to the stain right there.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt would be hard for you not to take your eyes off that spot and you would draw the conclusion that I was a messy or not a very well groomed kind of a slobbish person because of the stain on my shirt.\u00a0 Elisabeth Elliot said what percentage of the shirt has the stain on it? Three or four percent right there.\u00a0 What\u2019s the condition of the rest of the shirt?\u00a0 Clean.\u00a0 Good shape.\u00a0 She said, but we just can't help sometimes focusing on the stain.\u00a0 It\u2019s all we can think about that stain.\u00a0 And we define you by that stain.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo ladies, some of what you need to do is look a little broader at your husband and say, Lord, show me, help me to make the list of things that are respectable and worthy in him so that I can affirm him in those things.\u00a0 You ought to ask God over 30-day period to make the longest list you can.\u00a0 Then from time to time go to your husband and say, I appreciate so much that you go to work every day without complaining to provide for us.\u00a0 Thank you.\u00a0 There are lots of men who don\u2019t do that and you do, thank you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI appreciate the fact that you take care and get the car fixed, when something goes wrong with it.\u00a0 There are lots of men who just say to their wives, you take care of that, and you take care of that.\u00a0 Find those clean parts of the shirt and respect your husband.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow again, there is a fear that if you admire and praise and show respect to the clean part of the shirt then we will ignore that thinking, well she thinks I am all right, you know because she just talks about the good in me.\u00a0 Well let me just share something with you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn John 16 Jesus said, when the Holy Spirit comes, he will convict the world concerning sin, righteousness and judgment.\u00a0 What is the Holy Spirit\u2019s job?\u00a0 To convict the world concerning sin, righteousness, and judgment.\u00a0 Is there anywhere in the scriptures that you are aware of where it says when a wife comes to her husband, she should convict him concerning sin, righteousness and judgment?\u00a0 I don\u2019t believe you will find that verse.\u00a0 It is God\u2019s job to fix the stains.\u00a0 It\u2019s your job to respect her husband.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSome of you are going, well, I wish God would hurry up on the job because frankly, it\u2019s not working so well.\u00a0 It\u2019s been a long time and the stain is still there.\u00a0 Well, the stain may still be there because God is using the stain to work on you.\u00a0 I am not presuming that I know the mind of God in your situation, but I am suggesting that sometimes God\u2019s slow to work on one another, because he is doing a work in each other\u2019s lives.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf a man does not feeling respected at home, I\u2019m sorry to tell you he will take the longing of this soul to be respected and he will look for a place where it will happen.\u00a0 Now listen, I am not excusing a husband who goes off looking for it from another woman.\u00a0 Or frankly, the man who neglects his family because he is getting it from his job, he has just made an idol out of his job so that\u2019s no excuse either.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI am not excusing that.\u00a0 I am saying the hunger in the heart of a man is such that if he gives into his flesh, he will go try to find respect somewhere else.\u00a0 If he is not getting it from his wife who he longs to get it from, he will look for it somewhere else; a hobby, a club, a business.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe will be more vulnerable to the lure of a woman who does admire or respect him.\u00a0 If you are not doing it then some women at work is going, you are so smart.\u00a0 You just have to know that is catnip for a husband who is at home going, she thinks I am stupid.\u00a0 She thinks I am smart.\u00a0 Boy, she looks prettier all the time.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhich brings me to Number 8.\u00a0 You knew when I was going to get to this, sex is one of the most powerful ways to encourage and affirm and administer to your husband, alright.\u00a0 I got to go there.\u00a0 Your husbands called me and said, \u201cIf you do this workshop and don\u2019t bring up sex, do not send them home.\u00a0 That\u2019s what they said.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tA disclaimer at the front end of this we get letters from women today that are fascinating.\u00a0 I would say 20 to 30 percent of the women in the culture who are talking to us about it are saying to us, the stereotype is that the man wants sex and the woman is less interested.\u00a0 In our house the women say, it\u2019s flipped around.\u00a0 Some of you would say I don\u2019t know what\u2019s wrong with me in my marriage because I have more of an appetite than my husband does.\u00a0 And whenever you guys bring this up and you talk about man wanting sex and all of this it just makes me feel terrible because it\u2019s not like that with my husband.\u00a0 Well I can\u2019t dissect for you everything that\u2019s wrong. I can tell you in a sexually saturated culture like today, some of his sexual energy may be being drained off by pornography or other things.\u00a0 Some man are just working so hard at work that they don\u2019t have anything left for sex.\u00a0 Some man, there is you know you get to an age where there is a decline in testosterone or their other medical things that maybe going on, I mean all of that can happen.\u00a0 But for the most part, God made us as sexual beings and he wants us both to be interested in and to desire and to enjoy the sexual relationship.\u00a0 And \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have to share with you a verse that some of you need to hear and need to know that this is in the Bible and it\u2019s talking to you.\u00a0\u00a0 It is 1 Corinthians 7, verses 3 and 4.\u00a0 Here is what it says.\u00a0 The wife\u2019s body is not her own, but it belongs to her husband.\u00a0 The husband\u2019s body is not his own, it belongs to his wife, therefore stop depriving one another.\u00a0 A biblical command stop depriving one another except for a season of fasting and prayer.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI am guessing, I don\u2019t know but I am guessing that there aren\u2019t many couples who have said you know let\u2019s just take a season of fasting and prayer and do this.\u00a0 If depriving is going on at your house I am guessing that in some cases it may be the husband depriving the wife in some cases. In more cases, it\u2019s the wife depriving the husband and you could list for me a litany of reasons. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI am too tired.\u00a0 I am too this.\u00a0 He is too that.\u00a0 He is to what.\u00a0 I mean you can go through the whole list of why the depriving is happening.\u00a0 I would say to you stop it.\u00a0 Stop depriving your husband.\u00a0 You go, but it\u2019s not, but you don\u2019t, okay we can go back through all of the reasons why and Paul would say to you and I would say to you work on those things. You can do those things but don\u2019t deprive one another.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHere is part of the reason why.\u00a0 We talk about a man needing respect and affirmation probably the most powerful way you affirm your husband and show respect to him is when you respond to him sexually.\u00a0 I have said to Mary Ann, you can affirm me all day long.\u00a0 You can say you are smart.\u00a0 You are handsome.\u00a0 You are this.\u00a0 That\u2019s great.\u00a0 But at night, if I say, so you are interested and she goes, oh not tonight, I go, well why were you lying to me all day?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBecause in our minds, if we are all that, you should be dying to get in bed with us.\u00a0 We cannot figure out why you are not, if we are all that nice stuff, you have been saying about us.\u00a0 Even if you haven\u2019t been saying all that nice stuff about us, we still think we are pretty hot.\u00a0 We can't figure out why you don\u2019t.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLadies, when your husband initiates, respond to him.\u00a0 Now look, okay you go, but what if I have had. There are times when you may respond to your husband by saying, sweetheart as much as I want to engage with you tonight and really make this something special, I don\u2019t have it in me tonight.\u00a0 Could we plan for tomorrow night and I will get some rest and be ready for you?\u00a0 And most guys will say, yeah, that will be all right.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut don\u2019t say, all right, let\u2019s just get it over with okay?\u00a0 That does not affirm our masculinity at the core of our being.\u00a0 No guy hears that from his wife and goes, I am a man.\u00a0 We don\u2019t.\u00a0 Have you read in Proverb 7 about the luring adulteress and how she waits on the corner and how she says to the man, I have sprinkled my bed with aloe.\u00a0 It is smelling sweet.\u00a0 You want to come over?\u00a0 Now listen, we read that and go, that woman is shameful.\u00a0 I would say ladies read that and go how about if I did that with my husband?\u00a0 Because what she is doing to lure the man out of his marriage, if a woman was doing it, the husband will walk by and say, I got some better than you at home sweetie.\u00a0 It takes work.\u00a0 It takes effort and it takes energy.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen we are dating we thought that\u2019s going to be the easy thing, right.\u00a0 I mean that\u2019s going to be no problem.\u00a0 Now we get married and go, this is harder than we thought.\u00a0 But the Bible says we have a Lord have mercy on that one.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI understand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut ladies hear me on this.\u00a0 Regular sexual engagement with your husband is a marital discipline.\u00a0 For most couples two-three times a week is probably going to be a typical marital discipline.\u00a0 In fact, there were some denominations that said that two times a week is what's prescribed except on vacation, then it should be three times a week.\u00a0 I mean this was in some of their stuff, right.\u00a0 I don\u2019t know what the rhythm or cycle is for you, but I will tell you a couple of times, a month isn\u2019t it.\u00a0 Okay, I am serious.\u00a0 Twice a month sex is not enough.\u00a0 Make it a marital discipline and get in the game.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis<\/strong>:\u00a0 Well, we have been listening to a message by \u2013\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob<\/strong>:\u00a0 Actually little embarrassing to listen back to.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis<\/strong>:\u00a0 It is little forthright, he was giving this message.\u00a0 Bob Lepine was speaking to a group of women at the True Woman Conference, that\u2019s a conference that Nancy Leigh DeMoss our friend puts on. This one was in Chattanooga, Tennessee where 500 women braved a seminar to hear Bob, wax eloquently. Get in the game?\u00a0 And I want to say and most of God\u2019s men said, Amen.\u00a0 We are kind of laughing about that but I just want to make a comment because increasingly, Bob, in this generation there are about 30% of marriages where it is the women who are more sexually inclined than their husbands.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob<\/strong>:\u00a0 I made reference to that as I was speaking to these women because anytime you bring up this subject with a group and you start talking about men being interested, there are a number of wives who are going, I wish my husband was more interested.\u00a0 In fact, I pointed them to what you and Barbara wrote about in your book <em>Rekindling the Romance<\/em>, where you addressed that subject, that reality that some women have more sexual appetite than their husbands do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis<\/strong>:\u00a0 Yes and yet for most marriages, it is the man\u2019s appetite that is outdistancing his wife.\u00a0 There is a chapter in that book, Bob that in my opinion is worth the cost of the book.\u00a0 It's the chapter that Barbara wrote called The Power of Women.\u00a0 That\u2019s really what you have been talking about this week.\u00a0 You have been talking about how a woman can be uniquely powerful in her husband\u2019s life and you know what, you can be powerful, sexually you can be powerful with your words, with your life.\u00a0 A woman is in many ways the maker or the breaker of a man beginning at home.\u00a0 I just want to encourage the wives who are listening to us.\u00a0 I hope you will pick up a copy of Bob\u2019s message here or may be talk about it in a women\u2019s group and really apply this, seek to apply it in your own marriage.\u00a0 I really think we are underestimating, Bob, the power that women have and can have in their husband\u2019s lives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob<\/strong>:\u00a0 Well and I was encouraged to watch as these women were nodding and affirming and paying attention and listening and not put off and not folding their arms and pushing back.\u00a0 You could tell these women really do care about being godly wives and showing love and respect and affirmation for their husbands and they are saying help us to know how to do that better.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s one of the reasons this week we are making the audio of this message available.\u00a0 If you want to go to FamilyLifeToday.com you can download the mp3 file.\u00a0 It's there for free or if you would like to have a copy of the CD sent out to you, if you can help us with the donation of any amount we will send a CD out to you, all we ask is that you go to FamilyLifeToday.com and you click where it's say Make a Donation and when you come to the key code box on the online donation form, type the word \u201cHUSBANDS\u201d in there.\u00a0 That way we are going to send you a copy of the CD.\u00a0 And again thanks for whatever you are able to do from a donation standpoint.\u00a0 We appreciate your financial support.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd in fact we are hoping that this month many of you who have been regular listeners, but have never made a donation, will actually go online or call us and make your first donation to <em>FamilyLife Tod<\/em>ay.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are hoping that we can recruit 2,500 first time donors this month.\u00a0 Folks who have been regular listeners, but for whatever reason have never made a donation.\u00a0 I would just thinking 2,500.\u00a0 If you break that down by state that\u2019s just 50 families from every state over the course of the month.\u00a0 So we are hoping that, if you are one of those folks who has never made donation that you go to FamilyLifeToday.com and make a donation this month or call 1-800-FL-TODAY make your donation over the phone and if you call just ask for the CD on What Husbands Wish Their Wives Knew About Men and we will get it sent out it to you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd if you can\u2019t help this month with a donation of a $100 or more and you are a first time donor, we would love to send you a certificate so that you and your spouse can attend a Weekend to Remember\u00ae marriage getaway this fall or you can pass that certificate on to someone else if you would like. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd again all you need to do is go to FamilyLifeToday.com and there is a button over there that says First Time Donor, you click that button, make a donation of a $100 or more and we will send you that certificate or call 1-800-FL-TODAY make your donation over the phone, identify yourself as a first time donor and we will send that certificate out to you and we do appreciate your support of the ministry of <em>FamilyLifeToday<\/em>.\u00a0 Now tomorrow we want to encourage you to be back with us when Rob Mitchell is going to be here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Rob Mitchell<\/strong>:\u00a0 I remember that day clearly.\u00a0 There were piles of snow on the ground and my mother was dragging me faster than my three year old lives can walk.\u00a0 She drags me up this big building and commands me to play with another boy with blocks.\u00a0 I reach for a block and he steals it.\u00a0 I reach for a block and he steals it and I turned to my mother for help and she is gone.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 We are going to hear a very powerful story of a man who grew up as one of the last orphans living in an orphanage in the United States.\u00a0 He shares what it was like to grow up in an orphanage on tomorrow\u2019s program and I hope you can be with us for that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today Keith Lynch and our entire broadcast production team on behalf of our host Dennis Rainey, I am Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts for you. However, there is a cost to transcribe, create, and produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>www.FamilyLife.com<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/302088","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=302088"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=302088"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=302088"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=302088"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=302088"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=302088"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=302088"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}