{"id":302002,"date":"2010-03-30T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2010-03-30T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/appreciating-your-husband\/"},"modified":"2010-03-30T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2010-03-30T15:00:00","slug":"appreciating-your-husband","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/appreciating-your-husband\/","title":{"rendered":"Appreciating Your Husband"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Gary Thomas talks with Dennis Rainey about what men most need from their wives.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-03-30.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"23.65M","filesize_raw":"24800994","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2831],"tags":[5140,4022],"podcast_series":[7561],"cwp_profile":[3158],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-302002","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-wives","tag-husbands-needs","tag-wives","podcast_series-sacred-influence","cwp_profile-gary-thomas","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/302002\/appreciating-your-husband","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/302002\/appreciating-your-husband","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"GFLs6wrfqO\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/appreciating-your-husband\/\">Appreciating Your Husband<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/appreciating-your-husband\/embed\/#?secret=GFLs6wrfqO\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Appreciating Your Husband&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"GFLs6wrfqO\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var 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wives.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-03-30.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u00a0Let me ask you a different question \u2013 you learned something about a wife's influence or a woman's influence in a man's life.\u00a0 As you read the story about the widow at Zerapath in the Old Testament, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Gary:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, this is a classic case from 1 Kings 17 where a woman was in the most desperate of situations.\u00a0 She's facing a famine at the time.\u00a0 Her husband has already died, obviously, she's a widow, and she literally only has one meal left to bake for her son.\u00a0 I can't imagine being more desperate than know your husband has died and now you\u2019re literally going to watch your son starve to death in front of you.\u00a0 And yet God sends, really, a savior, with a little \"s\" at that point, named Elijah who asks her for a drink, and she gives him a drink, and then he says to her, \"And if you please will bake me a cake so I'll have something to eat.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo she's got a decision to make.\u00a0 \"I've only got a little bit left for my son, but let me try to make it for the prophet,\" and so she does, and his words to her were that if she would do that for him, that jar of oil \u2013 and the jug of oil would never run out until God sent rains back upon the land.\u00a0 God provided that way.\u00a0 Every day she opens up the jug and the jar, and there's still some oil and some flour in there, and I'm sure for a while she was shocked \u2013 the next day and the next day \u2013 the natural disbelief that, \"Wow, there's still something in here.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut then something happens.\u00a0 Over time, she expects there to be flour and oil in there.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, she'd be more surprised if there weren't oil and flour in there, even though there was no natural reason for that to be.\u00a0 And so then her son becomes ill of another disease not related to hunger.\u00a0 It proves fatal, he dies, and she goes to the prophet angry now and says, \"What good does it do me if you spare my son from starvation only to allow him to die of another disease?\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo Elijah takes her boy into the back, prays to God, God raises her boy from the dead.\u00a0 Elijah presents that boy to the mother, and she says \u2013 these are classic words \u2013 \"Now I know that you are a man of God, and that the word of the Lord from your mouth is the truth.\"\u00a0 If I could interview that widow, the first thing I'd like to say is this \u2013 \"Now you know he's a man of God?\"\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe was in the most desperate of situations and every day was literally a miracle of God's provision offered through this prophet and only now she begins to believe that God had visited her through this man.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 The oil thing didn't convince you, but your son's resurrection did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Gary:<\/strong>\u00a0 That is an element in every marriage \u2013 not just with wives but with husbands \u2013 when things are the way they are, when a husband provides a steady paycheck, a wife doesn't \u2013 she stops giving him credit.\u00a0 It's just the way things are.\u00a0 When her husband takes the family to church, she doesn't give him credit for it, it's just the way things are.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, if you talk to a woman who is married to a non-Christian or a man who is chronically unemployed, they think that would be the best thing in the world.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Gary:<\/strong>\u00a0 And so, really, one of the challenges of marriage is learn to appreciate a lot of those mundane things that we take for granted because, in our mind, it's just the way things are.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u00a0And it's back to Mary Ann's e-mail back to me saying, \"Thanks for working hard.\u00a0 Thanks for providing the paycheck.\u00a0 She doesn't take it for granted.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Small things to make a difference.\u00a0 You know, I feel like I'm quoting this verse repeatedly here on our broadcast, but I know we're speaking to some wives who are in some very harsh, tough situations.\u00a0 Romans, chapter 12, is a simple verse, but it just slices through the fog of the mundane and of disappointment, and it challenges us \u2013 \"Do not be overcome by evil but overcome evil with good.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGary, that's really what you're challenging wives to do who are in tough situations.\u00a0 You're writing this book to some women who are in perhaps abusive homes, homes where there has been no spiritual lights on for maybe decades.\u00a0 What hope and encouragement can you give that wife?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Gary:<\/strong>\u00a0 In my spare time, I've gotten into running marathons.\u00a0 I really enjoy it.\u00a0 My wife thinks I've lost my mind doing this, but I really enjoy it.\u00a0 We have a marathon training group where I've seen people that are not even in shape coming to learn to train to do a marathon.\u00a0 I've seen a lot of women who have never run three miles and six months later they finish a marathon.\u00a0 They have this challenge before them, and they make daily changes in their diet and in their physical exercise.\u00a0 Six months later they can complete a marathon.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you are married to a man with a really bad temper, a man with an addiction, a man who is not involved in home, a man who is not spiritually alive, that's your marathon.\u00a0 That's your challenge.\u00a0 You put it on the calendar and say, \"Lord, what do I need to do today and tomorrow and the next day to become the type of person who is strong enough to face that challenge.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd so you see, as backwards as this may sound, you see your imperfect husband as God's gift to call out your spiritual best.\u00a0 You need to become strong.\u00a0 You need to grow like you've never grown before because you have this great challenge before you.\u00a0 And as Christians we never have to just lay down and say, \"This is my life.\u00a0 There is nothing I can do about it.\"\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEvery woman listening to us literally, if she is a believer in Christ, has the power of God's Holy Spirit to fill her, to strengthen her, to renew her, to comfort her.\u00a0 She's got the wisdom of God's Word.\u00a0 If she's wise, she's got the fellowship of God's church.\u00a0 There isn't a husband alive who could stand against the power of God in a godly woman's life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This isn't original with me, but you've heard somebody say, \"You have a choice of either becoming bitter or becoming better.\"\u00a0 And, really, what Gary is calling women to here is don't become bitter, become better as lovers of God and as followers of Christ and watch that influence spill out into your home and your family.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 He's really talking, Bob, about seeing your husband change.\u00a0 I'm reminded \u2013 in fact, Gary, I've thought of this quote numerous times as you've talked this week, of a statement made by Martin Luther \u2013 \"Marriage is an institution but it's not a reformatory.\"\u00a0 A lot of us get into marriage, and we move from the relational institution that it is, and we begin to think God made us to change our spouse, and we know what's best for him or her, and we need to be about changing them.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat's really what I appreciate about what you've done in your book.\u00a0 You've called women to take the high road and seeing their husbands change.\u00a0 I just want to thank you for your excellent gift of writing.\u00a0 Bob, Gary is an outstanding writer, and if our listeners have never read any of his books, this book right here would be a great place to start.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 And I can imagine a lot of women who have been listening to this conversation and who do long in the core of their being\u2014they want to support and help and encourage and see their husband be all God wants him to be.\u00a0 That is the woman you wrote the book for.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe book is called <em>Sacred Influence\u2014How God Uses Wives to Shape the Souls of Their Husbands <\/em>and you can find it in our FamilyLife Resource Center.\u00a0 Go online at FamilyLifeToday.com or call 1-800-FLTODAY.\u00a0 That\u2019s 1-800-358-6329.\u00a0 Ask for a copy of the book <em>Sacred Influence<\/em> and we will make arrangements to have it sent to you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI was just recently with a station manager one of our friends who carries <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> on his local radio station and he was telling me about the feedback that he gets at the radio station from listeners who are tuned into the program.\u00a0 It was such an encouragement for me to hear it but I also know it was an encouragement to him as well.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to say to you if you have a chance to tell your local radio station staff or the station manager how much you appreciate <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> send him an email or give him a call. Thank him for airing <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> and say the program really is helping me as a husband or a wife.\u00a0 It\u2019s helping our family be all that God wants us to be. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen let me also say if you are able to help us with a donation to help support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> it\u2019s your gifts that help keep us on this local radio station.\u00a0 Go online or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and make a donation we would appreciate it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact this month we\u2019d love to say thank you to those of you who are able to make a donation of any amount by sending upon your request a copy of a new DVD called <em>Magdalena<\/em>.\u00a0 It tells the story of the life of Jesus through the eyes of Mary Magdalene.\u00a0 One of the great things about the DVD is that you can select a different audio track and listen to the film in Spanish, or in French, or in Mandarin, or in Korean, or Arabic, or Russian, or Portuguese.\u00a0 So, if you know someone who is from Korea or someone who speaks Arabic as their first language, you can give them a copy of this movie on DVD and they can be introduced to Jesus in their native tongue.\u00a0 You can receive the DVD as a thank-you gift when you make a donation of any amount this month to support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you make that donation online at FamilyLifeToday.com, type \u201cMAGDVD\u201d in the key code box on the online donation form; or simply call 1-800-FLTODAY.\u00a0 Make a donation over the phone and just ask for the <em>Magdalena<\/em> DVD.\u00a0 And again we trust that the resource will be an encouragement to your family and maybe something you can pass along to someone else who will benefit from watching it.\u00a0 Of course we want to say thanks for your support of this ministry.\u00a0 It means a lot that you would make a donation like that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs we have talked today with our guest Gary Thomas about a wife having a sacred influence on her husband.\u00a0 An influence for good.\u00a0 There is an illustration you share and I think it is in the book where you talk about one of our founding fathers John Adams and the impact his wife Abigail had on him.\u00a0 Share that illustration with our listeners.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Gary: <\/strong>\u00a0John Adams wrote to Abigail in a letter just at the start of the Revolutionary War.\u00a0 He said to her, you know, recognizing the challenge before the nation, he said to her, \"We can't guarantee success in this world, but we can deserve it.\"\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think that's what the Napoleon quote was ultimately pointing toward \u2013 that women can't guarantee they can change their husbands, but they can build their lives, they can organize their lives, they can create a climate in their home where they really deserve to see their husband influenced and change.\u00a0 That's the hope.\u00a0 Ultimately, you can only change yourself, but it's my belief that in changing yourself, you are far more likely to change in a very positive way the man that you're married to.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We'll see you back tomorrow for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts for you. However, there is a cost to transcribe, create, and produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>www.FamilyLife.com<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/302002","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=302002"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=302002"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=302002"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=302002"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=302002"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=302002"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=302002"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}