{"id":301968,"date":"2010-01-25T12:00:00","date_gmt":"2010-01-25T17:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/a-light-in-new-zealand\/"},"modified":"2010-01-25T12:00:00","modified_gmt":"2010-01-25T17:00:00","slug":"a-light-in-new-zealand","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/a-light-in-new-zealand\/","title":{"rendered":"A Light in New Zealand"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Andy and Nikki, directors of FamilyLife New Zealand, realize their marriage and family are a miracle from God.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-01-25.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"13.07M","filesize_raw":"13708692","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2860,2879],"tags":[4033,5097,5096],"podcast_series":[7703],"cwp_profile":[9188],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-301968","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-hardship-and-suffering","category-loss-of-a-child","tag-divorce","tag-health-issues","tag-hope","podcast_series-treasures-in-the-dark","cwp_profile-andy-and-nikki-bray","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/301968\/a-light-in-new-zealand","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/301968\/a-light-in-new-zealand","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"e0IM8uNzu2\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/a-light-in-new-zealand\/\">A Light in New Zealand<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/a-light-in-new-zealand\/embed\/#?secret=e0IM8uNzu2\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;A Light in New Zealand&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"e0IM8uNzu2\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-01-25.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-01-25.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u00a0This is <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em> for Monday January 25<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<em>\u00ae<\/em>, Dennis Rainey and I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 Andy and Nikki Bray join us today to talk about their great FamilyLife adventure in New Zealand.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae,<\/em> thanks for joining us on the Monday edition.\u00a0 We want to pause here at the beginning of today\u2019s program.\u00a0 This is the last week that we\u2019re going to be encouraging listeners to make sure you spend some time together in God\u2019s word, during 2010.\u00a0 As a family around the dinner table, as a couple before you go to bed at night, however you want to fit it into the rhythm of your life.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut, we\u2019ve been looking at different passages and actually what we\u2019ve been doing is going to the devotional that you and your wife Barbara wrote, Dennis which is called <em>Moments With You<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Because you start each of your daily devotionals with a verse from scripture.\u00a0 What\u2019s the verse on the 25<sup>th<\/sup> of January?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>James 1:24, it says \u201cOnce he has looked at himself and gone away, he has immediately forgotten what kind of person he was.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>This is the man looking in the mirror intently\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That\u2019s right.\u00a0 The passage is talking about being a doer of the word, and not merely a hearer.\u00a0 It\u2019s talking about the guy who isn\u2019t a doer.\u00a0 He looks into the mirror of God\u2019s word and forgets what it says.\u00a0 He doesn\u2019t apply it, doesn\u2019t practice it, and walks away from it.\u00a0 I\u2019ll tell you, if there\u2019s a need today, it is for people to be not merely hearers, but doers of the scripture.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>So, as we talk together about this passage today, pretty simple to talk about, \u201cAre we doing what we\u2019re supposed to be doing?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, and I think in a marriage relationship if I might stretch the analogy a bit, are you reflecting the truth of God\u2019s word to your spouse?\u00a0 To remind them to obey and not enabling your spouse in some areas where perhaps they\u2019re dabbling in things where they ought not to keep doing it.\u00a0 Maybe it\u2019s something you\u2019re watching on TV, a habit or lifestyle issue.\u00a0 In marriage, we can speak the truth in love to one another.\u00a0 So perhaps, what you ought to discuss is, \u201cIs there an area of our lives where we can better mirror God\u2019s truth to one another.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I have mentioned already this month that if our listeners are interested they can sign up to receive your daily devotional via e-mail.\u00a0 Go to our website at FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 There\u2019s information available there as well, about how you can get a copy of the book <em>Moments With You<\/em>.\u00a0 Whether you use this book or some other book, or if you just use the bible itself.\u00a0 We\u2019re hoping you\u2019ll spend some time together in God\u2019s word each day throughout the rest of this year.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, most of the time, when we do our radio program, we do it from our studios in Little Rock.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, where we are right now.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>And there have been occasions where we have actually done remote recording.\u00a0 We\u2019ve gone to visit a guest in a particular location and recorded from that location.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s correct.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>When you first came to me and said, \u201cWell we ought to have Andy and Nikki Bray from New Zealand on <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em>.\u201d\u00a0 I was thinking road trip.\u00a0 I was thinking, \u201cYes!\u00a0 We\u2019re going down to New Zealand to record!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s because you\u2019ve been and I haven\u2019t, and I\u2019m bitter.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019m a little disappointed.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You have truly experienced southern hospitality.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019ve been close.\u00a0 I\u2019ve not been to the land of the Kiwis, I\u2019ve only been to Australia.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I thought you had been to New Zealand!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, I\u2019ve never been to New Zealand.\u00a0 And, you can ask Andy and Nikki, they\u2019ll tell you that Australia is really just a poor man\u2019s New Zealand, is all it is.\u00a0 Isn\u2019t that right Andy?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Absolutely we\u2019re much more refined down here, than the Australians.\u00a0 It\u2019s so good to talk to you guys!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I do want to welcome you to <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em>, Andy and Nikki Bray, who are directors of FamilyLife of New Zealand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Thank you very much. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I want you to begin Andy, by just telling a little bit.\u00a0 You and Nikki have been married for 20 years, you have three children.\u00a0 And, you were an advertising executive when God kind of tapped you on the shoulder and had other plans for you.\u00a0 Would you share with our listeners a little bit of that faith journey of what took you out of the marketplace to make a difference in families in New Zealand?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, I came home from work one night and my beautiful wife here, flashed a pink photocopied brochure in front of me and said, \u201cWhy don\u2019t we go to this marriage conference?\u201d\u00a0 To me coming from the advertising background where I did glossies, annual reports and high quality production numbers, this pink photocopied flyer didn\u2019t quite do it for me.\u00a0 I thought we\u2019d be doing something in a church hall or something.\u00a0 Not quite my idea of a romantic weekend.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong>\u00a0 Though I had made a promise that we would do something on a regular basis to pursue our marriage so I was in a bit of a spot, agreed to go, and well, it\u2019s history now.\u00a0 We went to this amazing weekend at a hotel nonetheless and heard you guys speaking, and we were just completely, profoundly turned around on the spot on how we needed to get this amazing message to our Kiwi patriots here in New Zealand.\u00a0 After a little bit of persuasion, I talked to Nikki, and we decided to throw in our jobs at the advertising agency and join the ministry full time.\u00a0 It\u2019s kind of history now, but it was an amazing event for us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s the male perspective.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>So, give us the other side of the coin here Nikki.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, we did have a wonderful weekend.\u00a0 Andy came away from that weekend saying, \u201cI want to go to Little Rock and join and do this full time.\u201d\u00a0 I wasn\u2019t quite so keen at the time.\u00a0 Loved the weekend but didn\u2019t know if it was what we wanted to invest our lives into.\u00a0 So, we prayed about it.\u00a0 Andy talked to the team here, and was quite keen to do that.\u00a0 We found out that we had to raise support, of course.\u00a0 It took about nine months for me.\u00a0 Andy didn\u2019t push me; he gave me some time to process it.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI went to him one evening after about nine months and said to him, \u201cHoney, if this is what you really, really feel that the Lord wants us to do as a couple with our lives, then I want you to know I\u2019m 100% behind you.\u201d\u00a0 And the very next day he handed his notice in.\u00a0 That was scary for me because he didn\u2019t give me any time to get used to the idea.\u00a0 It was just, \u201cWe\u2019re going to do this.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>But I need to say, you guys were on video back then.\u00a0 So it wasn\u2019t you in here in New Zealand in person.\u00a0 So it was a slightly different experience than what you\u2019d be used to back in the States.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, I wanted to ask you about that.\u00a0 Going to a video conference and seeing two guys from the United States who were talking about marriage.\u00a0 Did you feel like it was a little out of sync with the Kiwi culture to hear a couple of Americans talking about marriage?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>We adjust pretty well.\u00a0 It was just so incredibly godly material, and so incredibly well presented.\u00a0 It just touched our hearts so much.\u00a0 Didn\u2019t it honey?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I think too, the biblical principles transcend any culture.\u00a0 That\u2019s the beauty of it.\u00a0 There\u2019s something neat about having your faces up there on the video.\u00a0 But then, of course in a live conference, we believed it\u2019s the same there.\u00a0 You might be on stage, but you\u2019ve got those videos where you can see people\u2019s faces and connect with them.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You\u2019ve had thousands of people who have viewed the video.\u00a0 When you do a Weekend to Remember\u00ae conference, there in New Zealand, do you typically have 50, 100, a couple hundred couples?\u00a0 How many come out for a Weekend to Remember\u00ae?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, our capacity here in New Zealand is a little bit smaller than you guys in America, and our conference rooms generally hold about 200 or 300 people.\u00a0 So we\u2019re generally full to capacity.\u00a0 We get as many people into a conference room as we can.\u00a0 So, every time we run a conference, they are full.\u00a0 But nothing like the numbers that you have.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Nikki, is there real legitimate life-change that takes place when people are sitting in a hotel room in New Zealand and watching a video of a couple of Yanks?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>It\u2019s absolutely unbelievable.\u00a0 The Lord does an incredible work in people\u2019s hearts.\u00a0 We just have so many stories of how God has changed their marriages and their lives and the lives of their children.\u00a0 It\u2019s just so encouraging.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You guys have experienced some challenges of your own in giving leadership to FamilyLife in New Zealand.\u00a0 Andy, when you left the advertising world and went full time with FamilyLife, you were already experiencing some health challenges back then weren\u2019t you?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I was.\u00a0 When I was about 21 years old I got a strep throat sore throat, and that led to a condition that blew my kidneys apart.\u00a0 I suffer from chronic renal failure, which meant that I had to get onto the kidney machine.\u00a0 Now, when I was at the advertising agency I\u2019d actually had a transplant by then, and was living life pretty well. We were having a good time with that transplant.\u00a0 I met Nikki, we got married, had three delightful children.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut soon after getting into ministry, I did lose that kidney.\u00a0 So for the last 12 years, I\u2019ve been back on that kidney machine again.\u00a0 I\u2019m trying to run a pretty fast train here, and keeping the team afloat.\u00a0 Trying to lead the team here, and run the conferences around the country.\u00a0 So it does have with it, its challenges for us, that\u2019s for sure.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You face dialysis on a weekly basis?\u00a0 How often are you strapped up to the machine?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I go on, not most days, but certainly every second day.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>For a couple of hours every second day?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 It\u2019s about a four hour process, Bob.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>And in the intervening time, are there ongoing health challenges related to the kidney failure? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, dialysis only does a certain amount of cleaning out one\u2019s blood I guess.\u00a0 So, I am left with some irritations, like some itchy skin.\u00a0 But we cope pretty well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>We do.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Nikki, I want to ask you about that.\u00a0 Because, it can be incredibly frustrating, painful and challenging to face what Andy is facing.\u00a0 And then challenging and frustrating for you as a wife to have your life wrapped up in that.\u00a0 Have you had to, as a couple, purpose to take some steps so you can stay fresh with one another in this battle?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, we have.\u00a0 I remember Andy saying when he first went on the machine.\u00a0 Because, of course Andy had been married before, he became a Christian, and he got sick when he was married.\u00a0\u00a0 His wife at the time didn\u2019t want to stay married to Andy.\u00a0 She didn\u2019t want to be married to a sick person, so she left him.\u00a0 Then after that he became a Christian.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo when he ended up on dialysis this time, he was very aware of the pressure that it puts on the other person.\u00a0 Of course we had children as well, so that was even more pressure on the family.\u00a0 So, he said to me, \u201cI want you to be involved as little as you possibly can be.\u00a0 I want to do this by myself so it doesn\u2019t have much of an impact on you.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, he has tried to protect us I think from the burden and the pressure of that.\u00a0 He sets up the machine, basically on his own.\u00a0 But, he does it at home in the lounge while we\u2019re all there.\u00a0 But he\u2019s tried to put boundaries around it.\u00a0 Then, just recently as he\u2019s had to increase his dialysis times, which is now every day and a half, he\u2019s said to me.\u00a0 \u201cYou have to continue to go out and do things that you want to do.\u00a0 Don\u2019t feel that you\u2019ve got to be stuck here, just because I\u2019m stuck here at home.\u201d\u00a0 So, he has always been very thoughtful of me, and not restricting my freedom or the children\u2019s freedom to match.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOf course I think one of the things that we\u2019ve both had to do for each other, has been to extend grace to one another, because we both get fearful.\u00a0 That machine can be quite frightening.\u00a0 Things have gone wrong and it\u2019s quite scary.\u00a0 We haven\u2019t always responded in the best way.\u00a0 But, we\u2019ve had to extend God\u2019s grace to one another in the midst of those situations.\u00a0 We\u2019ve seen Him do incredible things in the midst of those situations.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I\u2019m thinking back to last fall when my wife Mary Ann took five or six days, went to another city, to visit our daughter, son-in-law and our grandbaby.\u00a0 So I was at home, being Mr. Mom.\u00a0 I\u2019m just thinking, Nikki, you probably haven\u2019t had the opportunity to take five, six days and get away and be on your own, in 20 years of marriage have you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, I hadn\u2019t.\u00a0 That\u2019s exactly right.\u00a0 Because I had never felt like I could leave Andy.\u00a0 Because, he had the machine there, and I didn\u2019t want to leave him to do his dialysis on his own.\u00a0 But, I have just experienced that incredible opportunity, and I\u2019m so thankful for it.\u00a0 Last year, I won some money.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Let me tell you about this.\u00a0 Nikki won some money because she was voted by the New Zealand public as the best mum of New Zealand, \u201cMum of the Year\u201d award, she won.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That\u2019s great!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Wow!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong>\u00a0 There are not a lot of people that live here in New Zealand.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I want our American listeners to know that \u201cmum\u201d is \u201cmom.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>\u201cThe mum of the year\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That\u2019s right, The Mother of the year award of New Zealand.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>So, you were named the \u201cMum of the Year\u201d, in New Zealand, and you won a cash prize with that.\u00a0 What did you do with the money?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, I had always planned to take our oldest daughter to England when she was 21.\u00a0 So I was left with this money, and decided at the time that I would take Olivia, our middle daughter.\u00a0 So we went to the UK for four or five weeks.\u00a0 I haven\u2019t been back to England for 19 years.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, Olivia and I went to Paris and London, and I took her to the university that I attended in England, just visited where I grew up and my family.\u00a0 We had the most amazing time.\u00a0 And yes I haven\u2019t been able to do that.\u00a0 So it was just precious to spend that time with her, and to enjoy the freedom.\u00a0 But, of course, I must say I did miss the boys back home.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Andy, you got along okay while your wife was gone for four or five weeks?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, I had my son Benjamin with me, so we had quite a good boy\u2019s bachelor party really.\u00a0 In fact, the second day that Nikki left, we went out and bought a deep fat fryer.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>There you go!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That sounds like guy time right there!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0\u00a0 <\/strong>That\u2019ll work right here in Arkansas!\u00a0 You\u2019ve written a book called <em>Treasures in the Darkness. <\/em>You told a story about how one day you got out of bed on the wrong side of the bed.\u00a0 I found it interesting that there\u2019s a wrong side in New Zealand just like there is here in America.\u00a0 You were grumpy and, kind of grouchy, and you were short with Nikki, and said some things you shouldn\u2019t have said to her.\u00a0 And you arrived at the office, and you opened your e-mail, and there in your inbox was an e-mail from Nikki.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNikki, what I\u2019d like you to do is get your book, turn to page 126, and I want you to read what you had written to him.\u00a0 Is there anything else you want to add, about how grumpy and grouchy you were that day, Andy before she reads this?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I just remember\u2014you know.\u00a0 You\u2019ve probably been there yourselves.\u00a0 When you get out of bed, you just hit the wrong vibe.\u00a0 Just saying some things and behaving in a way that\u2019s deplorable.\u00a0 Just, not good.\u00a0 You just wish you could wind the clock back.\u00a0 Then I arrived at work, knowing I had abused Nikki with my tongue and maybe the kids as well.\u00a0 Not being as good as I could have been.\u00a0 I turn my email on, and this is what she wrote me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cI was just folding some washing and thinking what an amazing husband you are.\u00a0 I continue to admire the way you faithfully take the kids out to breakfast once a week.\u00a0 You may wonder whether you are having an impact.\u00a0 Take it by faith, you are having a huge impact, and you will only ever know it when they are older and can tell you some of their treasured memories.\u00a0 Bringing up a family takes a great deal of effort.\u00a0 Thanks for striving to be the best that you can be.\u00a0 I appreciate all that you do, the notes to us all, comments in their books, art classes keeping the home and garden neat and tidy, cleaning our cars, reading to the kids when you\u2019re on the machine.\u00a0 I know you\u2019d rather crash, but you never say \u201cno\u201d.\u00a0 Plus so much more.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe think you\u2019re terrific, and we\u2019re blessed to have you as our family leader, husband, and dad.\u00a0 Your loving honey\u2026\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>When you don\u2019t deserve, even a kind word, to have all of those words poured out, as I arrived at work, the very first thing I read.\u00a0 It\u2019s an incredibly uplifting, inspirational person to have in your life that can bless you in such a way when you least deserve it.\u00a0 She is my rock, guys, I just can\u2019t say that often enough, how I just so appreciate this woman in my life that enables me to do what we do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Nikki, that sounds a little bit like giving a blessing for an insult.\u00a0 I\u2019ve heard something about that at the Weekend to Remember\u00ae.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, that\u2019s exactly right.\u00a0 I mean, you have to live what you preach don\u2019t you? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, sometimes it does come back to bite you, you\u2019re right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>There is one more story I want you tell here before we\u2019re done today.\u00a0 There happened to be an evening when you had this young couple coming to your house who you were going to counsel.\u00a0 And on your way back home\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Wait, I think they know the story, just tell us what happened?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>We\u2019d had some arguments on the Saturday evening, and we went to bed, and it hadn\u2019t been resolved.\u00a0 We got up on Sunday morning, and of course it still hadn\u2019t been resolved.\u00a0 It was still there.\u00a0 We went off to church, and I forgot all about it, while we were going through the church service.\u00a0 We got back in the car, and I said something that really ticked Andy off, and it all flared up again.\u00a0 So, we were driving along the road, and he got so angry that he pulled the car off to the side of the road, opened the door and said, \u201cI\u2019m out of here.\u201d\u00a0 He stormed off across the field never to be seen again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Wait, wait.\u00a0 This is the director of FamilyLife in New Zealand?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I\u2019m afraid so.\u00a0 We live exactly where you live.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>And it happened to be raining as you walked across that field, didn\u2019t it Andy?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>It was very wet.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>And of course, we had three young children in the car looking, saying \u201cWhat on earth is going on here?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Where\u2019s daddy going?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, that\u2019s right.\u00a0 This was probably half-past-twelve in the afternoon.\u00a0 So I took the children home, fed them, and started to get a little bit concerned because Daddy hadn\u2019t come home.\u00a0 I started to feel a bit sorry for him.\u00a0 It was about four hours later by this stage.\u00a0 So, I loaded them into the car, drove around looking for him.\u00a0 It was pouring down with rain, and couldn\u2019t see him anywhere, came home. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen I think about, finally at six o\u2019clock at night he walked through the door, looking a bit like a drowned rat.\u00a0 Came up to me and said, \u201cHoney, I am really sorry I acted like a fool.\u00a0 Would you please forgive me?\u201d\u00a0 And yes, the young couple came around about an hour later for pre-marital counseling.\u00a0 The first thing they said when they walked in the door was \u201cDidn\u2019t we see Andy around three o\u2019clock walking along the highway in the pouring rain?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>So they got a little real family life right there didn\u2019t they?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>They sure did!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u00a0What a great lesson to pass on to our listeners.\u00a0 I have a feeling there\u2019s someone who may be listening on an iPhone right now, walking beside the road.\u00a0 He\u2019s gotten out of the car.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>A drowned rat who is tuned into <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u00a0I want to thank you guys for taking this time with us and giving leadership to FamilyLife there in New Zealand.\u00a0 There is more that we can unpack from your story but we\u2019re going to have to do that a little later.\u00a0 But, thanks for being with us, and thanks for being on the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u00a0You know, I have to think that in that drowned rat moment, the fact that you guys had attended and, in fact hosted dozens of FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae Marriage Conferences, and watched Dennis on video all of those years.\u00a0 That had to come back and pay some dividends in that moment.\u00a0 I\u2019m thinking of the listeners\u2014we\u2019ve got listeners that have attended a FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae, some of our listeners haven\u2019t ever attended one.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve got some that have been to a conference or, even two or three.\u00a0 But it never hurts to have a refresher in something like the Weekend to Remember\u00ae. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI mention that because here in a couple of weeks we\u2019re going to be kicking off the spring season of the Weekend to Remember\u00ae Marriage Conferences.\u00a0 You\u2019re going to be up Valentine\u2019s weekend at the Gaylord National Hotel in the Washington, D.C. area, with your wife Barbara.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to be at the Hershey Lodge in Hershey, Pennsylvania that same weekend.\u00a0 We have other conferences around the country that weekend and then in subsequent weekends throughout the spring.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf our listeners are interested in attending a Weekend to Remember\u00ae Marriage Conference, they can go online at FamilyLifeToday.com, for more information about the conference.\u00a0 Or they can register online if they\u2019d like at FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 You can also register by phone, 1-800-FLTODAY is the number.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me just say a word to regular <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em> listeners.\u00a0 Many of you are aware that we have a small group of folks who help support this ministry as monthly donors.\u00a0 We call them Legacy Partners.\u00a0 If you sign up this week as a new Legacy Partner, and you agree to have your donations sent each month by credit card draft or by bank draft, we\u2019d love to send you a certificate so you and your spouse can attend a Weekend to Remember\u00ae at no cost.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo you sign up as a supporter of <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em>, a monthly Legacy Partner, you have those donations made by credit card draft of bank draft and we\u2019ll send you a Weekend to Remember\u00ae gift certificate, again at no cost, and you guys can attend one of the upcoming conferences as our guests.\u00a0 It\u2019s our way of saying thanks for your monthly support of the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em>.\u00a0 So, whether you want to go online and register or call us and register, or look into becoming a Legacy Partner, and attend as our guest as a new Legacy Partner, whatever works for you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGo online at FamilyLifeToday.com or call 1-800-FLTODAY, and make plans to join us for a Weekend to Remember\u00ae.\u00a0 And then the next time you walk away from the car and are caught in the rain, you can stop and think, \u201cWhat was it they said at the Weekend to Remember\u00ae?\u201d\u00a0 And maybe the memories will help you out a little bit.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTomorrow Andy and Nikki Bray are going to be back with us and we\u2019re going to talk more with them about the ministry in New Zealand, but we\u2019re also going to hear about a tragedy that hit their family.\u00a0 This was almost two years ago now.\u00a0 They\u2019ll unpack the story for us tomorrow.\u00a0 I hope you can be here to hear it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today Keith Lynch and our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife<em>\u00ae<\/em> of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today, Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts for you. However, there is a cost to transcribe, create, and produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>www.FamilyLife.com<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["13.07M"],"filesize_raw":["13708692"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-301968.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-301968.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: 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and Nikki, directors of FamilyLife New Zealand, realize their marriage and family are a miracle from God.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2010-01-25.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u00a0This is <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em> for Monday January 25<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is the President of FamilyLife<em>\u00ae<\/em>, Dennis Rainey and I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 Andy and Nikki Bray join us today to talk about their great FamilyLife adventure in New Zealand.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae,<\/em> thanks for joining us on the Monday edition.\u00a0 We want to pause here at the beginning of today\u2019s program.\u00a0 This is the last week that we\u2019re going to be encouraging listeners to make sure you spend some time together in God\u2019s word, during 2010.\u00a0 As a family around the dinner table, as a couple before you go to bed at night, however you want to fit it into the rhythm of your life.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut, we\u2019ve been looking at different passages and actually what we\u2019ve been doing is going to the devotional that you and your wife Barbara wrote, Dennis which is called <em>Moments With You<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Because you start each of your daily devotionals with a verse from scripture.\u00a0 What\u2019s the verse on the 25<sup>th<\/sup> of January?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>James 1:24, it says \u201cOnce he has looked at himself and gone away, he has immediately forgotten what kind of person he was.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>This is the man looking in the mirror intently\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That\u2019s right.\u00a0 The passage is talking about being a doer of the word, and not merely a hearer.\u00a0 It\u2019s talking about the guy who isn\u2019t a doer.\u00a0 He looks into the mirror of God\u2019s word and forgets what it says.\u00a0 He doesn\u2019t apply it, doesn\u2019t practice it, and walks away from it.\u00a0 I\u2019ll tell you, if there\u2019s a need today, it is for people to be not merely hearers, but doers of the scripture.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>So, as we talk together about this passage today, pretty simple to talk about, \u201cAre we doing what we\u2019re supposed to be doing?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, and I think in a marriage relationship if I might stretch the analogy a bit, are you reflecting the truth of God\u2019s word to your spouse?\u00a0 To remind them to obey and not enabling your spouse in some areas where perhaps they\u2019re dabbling in things where they ought not to keep doing it.\u00a0 Maybe it\u2019s something you\u2019re watching on TV, a habit or lifestyle issue.\u00a0 In marriage, we can speak the truth in love to one another.\u00a0 So perhaps, what you ought to discuss is, \u201cIs there an area of our lives where we can better mirror God\u2019s truth to one another.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I have mentioned already this month that if our listeners are interested they can sign up to receive your daily devotional via e-mail.\u00a0 Go to our website at FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 There\u2019s information available there as well, about how you can get a copy of the book <em>Moments With You<\/em>.\u00a0 Whether you use this book or some other book, or if you just use the bible itself.\u00a0 We\u2019re hoping you\u2019ll spend some time together in God\u2019s word each day throughout the rest of this year.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, most of the time, when we do our radio program, we do it from our studios in Little Rock.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, where we are right now.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>And there have been occasions where we have actually done remote recording.\u00a0 We\u2019ve gone to visit a guest in a particular location and recorded from that location.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s correct.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>When you first came to me and said, \u201cWell we ought to have Andy and Nikki Bray from New Zealand on <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em>.\u201d\u00a0 I was thinking road trip.\u00a0 I was thinking, \u201cYes!\u00a0 We\u2019re going down to New Zealand to record!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s because you\u2019ve been and I haven\u2019t, and I\u2019m bitter.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019m a little disappointed.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You have truly experienced southern hospitality.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I\u2019ve been close.\u00a0 I\u2019ve not been to the land of the Kiwis, I\u2019ve only been to Australia.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I thought you had been to New Zealand!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, I\u2019ve never been to New Zealand.\u00a0 And, you can ask Andy and Nikki, they\u2019ll tell you that Australia is really just a poor man\u2019s New Zealand, is all it is.\u00a0 Isn\u2019t that right Andy?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Absolutely we\u2019re much more refined down here, than the Australians.\u00a0 It\u2019s so good to talk to you guys!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I do want to welcome you to <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em>, Andy and Nikki Bray, who are directors of FamilyLife of New Zealand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Thank you very much. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I want you to begin Andy, by just telling a little bit.\u00a0 You and Nikki have been married for 20 years, you have three children.\u00a0 And, you were an advertising executive when God kind of tapped you on the shoulder and had other plans for you.\u00a0 Would you share with our listeners a little bit of that faith journey of what took you out of the marketplace to make a difference in families in New Zealand?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, I came home from work one night and my beautiful wife here, flashed a pink photocopied brochure in front of me and said, \u201cWhy don\u2019t we go to this marriage conference?\u201d\u00a0 To me coming from the advertising background where I did glossies, annual reports and high quality production numbers, this pink photocopied flyer didn\u2019t quite do it for me.\u00a0 I thought we\u2019d be doing something in a church hall or something.\u00a0 Not quite my idea of a romantic weekend.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong>\u00a0 Though I had made a promise that we would do something on a regular basis to pursue our marriage so I was in a bit of a spot, agreed to go, and well, it\u2019s history now.\u00a0 We went to this amazing weekend at a hotel nonetheless and heard you guys speaking, and we were just completely, profoundly turned around on the spot on how we needed to get this amazing message to our Kiwi patriots here in New Zealand.\u00a0 After a little bit of persuasion, I talked to Nikki, and we decided to throw in our jobs at the advertising agency and join the ministry full time.\u00a0 It\u2019s kind of history now, but it was an amazing event for us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong>\u00a0 That\u2019s the male perspective.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>So, give us the other side of the coin here Nikki.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, we did have a wonderful weekend.\u00a0 Andy came away from that weekend saying, \u201cI want to go to Little Rock and join and do this full time.\u201d\u00a0 I wasn\u2019t quite so keen at the time.\u00a0 Loved the weekend but didn\u2019t know if it was what we wanted to invest our lives into.\u00a0 So, we prayed about it.\u00a0 Andy talked to the team here, and was quite keen to do that.\u00a0 We found out that we had to raise support, of course.\u00a0 It took about nine months for me.\u00a0 Andy didn\u2019t push me; he gave me some time to process it.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI went to him one evening after about nine months and said to him, \u201cHoney, if this is what you really, really feel that the Lord wants us to do as a couple with our lives, then I want you to know I\u2019m 100% behind you.\u201d\u00a0 And the very next day he handed his notice in.\u00a0 That was scary for me because he didn\u2019t give me any time to get used to the idea.\u00a0 It was just, \u201cWe\u2019re going to do this.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>But I need to say, you guys were on video back then.\u00a0 So it wasn\u2019t you in here in New Zealand in person.\u00a0 So it was a slightly different experience than what you\u2019d be used to back in the States.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, I wanted to ask you about that.\u00a0 Going to a video conference and seeing two guys from the United States who were talking about marriage.\u00a0 Did you feel like it was a little out of sync with the Kiwi culture to hear a couple of Americans talking about marriage?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>We adjust pretty well.\u00a0 It was just so incredibly godly material, and so incredibly well presented.\u00a0 It just touched our hearts so much.\u00a0 Didn\u2019t it honey?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I think too, the biblical principles transcend any culture.\u00a0 That\u2019s the beauty of it.\u00a0 There\u2019s something neat about having your faces up there on the video.\u00a0 But then, of course in a live conference, we believed it\u2019s the same there.\u00a0 You might be on stage, but you\u2019ve got those videos where you can see people\u2019s faces and connect with them.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You\u2019ve had thousands of people who have viewed the video.\u00a0 When you do a Weekend to Remember\u00ae conference, there in New Zealand, do you typically have 50, 100, a couple hundred couples?\u00a0 How many come out for a Weekend to Remember\u00ae?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, our capacity here in New Zealand is a little bit smaller than you guys in America, and our conference rooms generally hold about 200 or 300 people.\u00a0 So we\u2019re generally full to capacity.\u00a0 We get as many people into a conference room as we can.\u00a0 So, every time we run a conference, they are full.\u00a0 But nothing like the numbers that you have.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Nikki, is there real legitimate life-change that takes place when people are sitting in a hotel room in New Zealand and watching a video of a couple of Yanks?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>It\u2019s absolutely unbelievable.\u00a0 The Lord does an incredible work in people\u2019s hearts.\u00a0 We just have so many stories of how God has changed their marriages and their lives and the lives of their children.\u00a0 It\u2019s just so encouraging.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You guys have experienced some challenges of your own in giving leadership to FamilyLife in New Zealand.\u00a0 Andy, when you left the advertising world and went full time with FamilyLife, you were already experiencing some health challenges back then weren\u2019t you?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I was.\u00a0 When I was about 21 years old I got a strep throat sore throat, and that led to a condition that blew my kidneys apart.\u00a0 I suffer from chronic renal failure, which meant that I had to get onto the kidney machine.\u00a0 Now, when I was at the advertising agency I\u2019d actually had a transplant by then, and was living life pretty well. We were having a good time with that transplant.\u00a0 I met Nikki, we got married, had three delightful children.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut soon after getting into ministry, I did lose that kidney.\u00a0 So for the last 12 years, I\u2019ve been back on that kidney machine again.\u00a0 I\u2019m trying to run a pretty fast train here, and keeping the team afloat.\u00a0 Trying to lead the team here, and run the conferences around the country.\u00a0 So it does have with it, its challenges for us, that\u2019s for sure.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You face dialysis on a weekly basis?\u00a0 How often are you strapped up to the machine?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I go on, not most days, but certainly every second day.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>For a couple of hours every second day?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes.\u00a0 It\u2019s about a four hour process, Bob.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>And in the intervening time, are there ongoing health challenges related to the kidney failure? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, dialysis only does a certain amount of cleaning out one\u2019s blood I guess.\u00a0 So, I am left with some irritations, like some itchy skin.\u00a0 But we cope pretty well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>We do.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Nikki, I want to ask you about that.\u00a0 Because, it can be incredibly frustrating, painful and challenging to face what Andy is facing.\u00a0 And then challenging and frustrating for you as a wife to have your life wrapped up in that.\u00a0 Have you had to, as a couple, purpose to take some steps so you can stay fresh with one another in this battle?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, we have.\u00a0 I remember Andy saying when he first went on the machine.\u00a0 Because, of course Andy had been married before, he became a Christian, and he got sick when he was married.\u00a0\u00a0 His wife at the time didn\u2019t want to stay married to Andy.\u00a0 She didn\u2019t want to be married to a sick person, so she left him.\u00a0 Then after that he became a Christian.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo when he ended up on dialysis this time, he was very aware of the pressure that it puts on the other person.\u00a0 Of course we had children as well, so that was even more pressure on the family.\u00a0 So, he said to me, \u201cI want you to be involved as little as you possibly can be.\u00a0 I want to do this by myself so it doesn\u2019t have much of an impact on you.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, he has tried to protect us I think from the burden and the pressure of that.\u00a0 He sets up the machine, basically on his own.\u00a0 But, he does it at home in the lounge while we\u2019re all there.\u00a0 But he\u2019s tried to put boundaries around it.\u00a0 Then, just recently as he\u2019s had to increase his dialysis times, which is now every day and a half, he\u2019s said to me.\u00a0 \u201cYou have to continue to go out and do things that you want to do.\u00a0 Don\u2019t feel that you\u2019ve got to be stuck here, just because I\u2019m stuck here at home.\u201d\u00a0 So, he has always been very thoughtful of me, and not restricting my freedom or the children\u2019s freedom to match.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOf course I think one of the things that we\u2019ve both had to do for each other, has been to extend grace to one another, because we both get fearful.\u00a0 That machine can be quite frightening.\u00a0 Things have gone wrong and it\u2019s quite scary.\u00a0 We haven\u2019t always responded in the best way.\u00a0 But, we\u2019ve had to extend God\u2019s grace to one another in the midst of those situations.\u00a0 We\u2019ve seen Him do incredible things in the midst of those situations.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I\u2019m thinking back to last fall when my wife Mary Ann took five or six days, went to another city, to visit our daughter, son-in-law and our grandbaby.\u00a0 So I was at home, being Mr. Mom.\u00a0 I\u2019m just thinking, Nikki, you probably haven\u2019t had the opportunity to take five, six days and get away and be on your own, in 20 years of marriage have you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, I hadn\u2019t.\u00a0 That\u2019s exactly right.\u00a0 Because I had never felt like I could leave Andy.\u00a0 Because, he had the machine there, and I didn\u2019t want to leave him to do his dialysis on his own.\u00a0 But, I have just experienced that incredible opportunity, and I\u2019m so thankful for it.\u00a0 Last year, I won some money.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Let me tell you about this.\u00a0 Nikki won some money because she was voted by the New Zealand public as the best mum of New Zealand, \u201cMum of the Year\u201d award, she won.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That\u2019s great!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Wow!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong>\u00a0 There are not a lot of people that live here in New Zealand.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I want our American listeners to know that \u201cmum\u201d is \u201cmom.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>\u201cThe mum of the year\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That\u2019s right, The Mother of the year award of New Zealand.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>So, you were named the \u201cMum of the Year\u201d, in New Zealand, and you won a cash prize with that.\u00a0 What did you do with the money?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, I had always planned to take our oldest daughter to England when she was 21.\u00a0 So I was left with this money, and decided at the time that I would take Olivia, our middle daughter.\u00a0 So we went to the UK for four or five weeks.\u00a0 I haven\u2019t been back to England for 19 years.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, Olivia and I went to Paris and London, and I took her to the university that I attended in England, just visited where I grew up and my family.\u00a0 We had the most amazing time.\u00a0 And yes I haven\u2019t been able to do that.\u00a0 So it was just precious to spend that time with her, and to enjoy the freedom.\u00a0 But, of course, I must say I did miss the boys back home.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Andy, you got along okay while your wife was gone for four or five weeks?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Well, I had my son Benjamin with me, so we had quite a good boy\u2019s bachelor party really.\u00a0 In fact, the second day that Nikki left, we went out and bought a deep fat fryer.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>There you go!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>That sounds like guy time right there!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0\u00a0 <\/strong>That\u2019ll work right here in Arkansas!\u00a0 You\u2019ve written a book called <em>Treasures in the Darkness. <\/em>You told a story about how one day you got out of bed on the wrong side of the bed.\u00a0 I found it interesting that there\u2019s a wrong side in New Zealand just like there is here in America.\u00a0 You were grumpy and, kind of grouchy, and you were short with Nikki, and said some things you shouldn\u2019t have said to her.\u00a0 And you arrived at the office, and you opened your e-mail, and there in your inbox was an e-mail from Nikki.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNikki, what I\u2019d like you to do is get your book, turn to page 126, and I want you to read what you had written to him.\u00a0 Is there anything else you want to add, about how grumpy and grouchy you were that day, Andy before she reads this?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I just remember\u2014you know.\u00a0 You\u2019ve probably been there yourselves.\u00a0 When you get out of bed, you just hit the wrong vibe.\u00a0 Just saying some things and behaving in a way that\u2019s deplorable.\u00a0 Just, not good.\u00a0 You just wish you could wind the clock back.\u00a0 Then I arrived at work, knowing I had abused Nikki with my tongue and maybe the kids as well.\u00a0 Not being as good as I could have been.\u00a0 I turn my email on, and this is what she wrote me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong>\u00a0 \u201cI was just folding some washing and thinking what an amazing husband you are.\u00a0 I continue to admire the way you faithfully take the kids out to breakfast once a week.\u00a0 You may wonder whether you are having an impact.\u00a0 Take it by faith, you are having a huge impact, and you will only ever know it when they are older and can tell you some of their treasured memories.\u00a0 Bringing up a family takes a great deal of effort.\u00a0 Thanks for striving to be the best that you can be.\u00a0 I appreciate all that you do, the notes to us all, comments in their books, art classes keeping the home and garden neat and tidy, cleaning our cars, reading to the kids when you\u2019re on the machine.\u00a0 I know you\u2019d rather crash, but you never say \u201cno\u201d.\u00a0 Plus so much more.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe think you\u2019re terrific, and we\u2019re blessed to have you as our family leader, husband, and dad.\u00a0 Your loving honey\u2026\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>When you don\u2019t deserve, even a kind word, to have all of those words poured out, as I arrived at work, the very first thing I read.\u00a0 It\u2019s an incredibly uplifting, inspirational person to have in your life that can bless you in such a way when you least deserve it.\u00a0 She is my rock, guys, I just can\u2019t say that often enough, how I just so appreciate this woman in my life that enables me to do what we do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Nikki, that sounds a little bit like giving a blessing for an insult.\u00a0 I\u2019ve heard something about that at the Weekend to Remember\u00ae.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, that\u2019s exactly right.\u00a0 I mean, you have to live what you preach don\u2019t you? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Yes, sometimes it does come back to bite you, you\u2019re right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>There is one more story I want you tell here before we\u2019re done today.\u00a0 There happened to be an evening when you had this young couple coming to your house who you were going to counsel.\u00a0 And on your way back home\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Wait, I think they know the story, just tell us what happened?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>We\u2019d had some arguments on the Saturday evening, and we went to bed, and it hadn\u2019t been resolved.\u00a0 We got up on Sunday morning, and of course it still hadn\u2019t been resolved.\u00a0 It was still there.\u00a0 We went off to church, and I forgot all about it, while we were going through the church service.\u00a0 We got back in the car, and I said something that really ticked Andy off, and it all flared up again.\u00a0 So, we were driving along the road, and he got so angry that he pulled the car off to the side of the road, opened the door and said, \u201cI\u2019m out of here.\u201d\u00a0 He stormed off across the field never to be seen again.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Wait, wait.\u00a0 This is the director of FamilyLife in New Zealand?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I\u2019m afraid so.\u00a0 We live exactly where you live.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>And it happened to be raining as you walked across that field, didn\u2019t it Andy?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Andy:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>It was very wet.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>And of course, we had three young children in the car looking, saying \u201cWhat on earth is going on here?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Where\u2019s daddy going?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, that\u2019s right.\u00a0 This was probably half-past-twelve in the afternoon.\u00a0 So I took the children home, fed them, and started to get a little bit concerned because Daddy hadn\u2019t come home.\u00a0 I started to feel a bit sorry for him.\u00a0 It was about four hours later by this stage.\u00a0 So, I loaded them into the car, drove around looking for him.\u00a0 It was pouring down with rain, and couldn\u2019t see him anywhere, came home. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen I think about, finally at six o\u2019clock at night he walked through the door, looking a bit like a drowned rat.\u00a0 Came up to me and said, \u201cHoney, I am really sorry I acted like a fool.\u00a0 Would you please forgive me?\u201d\u00a0 And yes, the young couple came around about an hour later for pre-marital counseling.\u00a0 The first thing they said when they walked in the door was \u201cDidn\u2019t we see Andy around three o\u2019clock walking along the highway in the pouring rain?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>So they got a little real family life right there didn\u2019t they?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Nikki:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>They sure did!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u00a0What a great lesson to pass on to our listeners.\u00a0 I have a feeling there\u2019s someone who may be listening on an iPhone right now, walking beside the road.\u00a0 He\u2019s gotten out of the car.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>A drowned rat who is tuned into <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u00a0I want to thank you guys for taking this time with us and giving leadership to FamilyLife there in New Zealand.\u00a0 There is more that we can unpack from your story but we\u2019re going to have to do that a little later.\u00a0 But, thanks for being with us, and thanks for being on the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u00a0You know, I have to think that in that drowned rat moment, the fact that you guys had attended and, in fact hosted dozens of FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae Marriage Conferences, and watched Dennis on video all of those years.\u00a0 That had to come back and pay some dividends in that moment.\u00a0 I\u2019m thinking of the listeners\u2014we\u2019ve got listeners that have attended a FamilyLife Weekend to Remember\u00ae, some of our listeners haven\u2019t ever attended one.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve got some that have been to a conference or, even two or three.\u00a0 But it never hurts to have a refresher in something like the Weekend to Remember\u00ae. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI mention that because here in a couple of weeks we\u2019re going to be kicking off the spring season of the Weekend to Remember\u00ae Marriage Conferences.\u00a0 You\u2019re going to be up Valentine\u2019s weekend at the Gaylord National Hotel in the Washington, D.C. area, with your wife Barbara.\u00a0 I\u2019m going to be at the Hershey Lodge in Hershey, Pennsylvania that same weekend.\u00a0 We have other conferences around the country that weekend and then in subsequent weekends throughout the spring.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf our listeners are interested in attending a Weekend to Remember\u00ae Marriage Conference, they can go online at FamilyLifeToday.com, for more information about the conference.\u00a0 Or they can register online if they\u2019d like at FamilyLifeToday.com.\u00a0 You can also register by phone, 1-800-FLTODAY is the number.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLet me just say a word to regular <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em> listeners.\u00a0 Many of you are aware that we have a small group of folks who help support this ministry as monthly donors.\u00a0 We call them Legacy Partners.\u00a0 If you sign up this week as a new Legacy Partner, and you agree to have your donations sent each month by credit card draft or by bank draft, we\u2019d love to send you a certificate so you and your spouse can attend a Weekend to Remember\u00ae at no cost.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo you sign up as a supporter of <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em>, a monthly Legacy Partner, you have those donations made by credit card draft of bank draft and we\u2019ll send you a Weekend to Remember\u00ae gift certificate, again at no cost, and you guys can attend one of the upcoming conferences as our guests.\u00a0 It\u2019s our way of saying thanks for your monthly support of the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em>.\u00a0 So, whether you want to go online and register or call us and register, or look into becoming a Legacy Partner, and attend as our guest as a new Legacy Partner, whatever works for you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGo online at FamilyLifeToday.com or call 1-800-FLTODAY, and make plans to join us for a Weekend to Remember\u00ae.\u00a0 And then the next time you walk away from the car and are caught in the rain, you can stop and think, \u201cWhat was it they said at the Weekend to Remember\u00ae?\u201d\u00a0 And maybe the memories will help you out a little bit.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTomorrow Andy and Nikki Bray are going to be back with us and we\u2019re going to talk more with them about the ministry in New Zealand, but we\u2019re also going to hear about a tragedy that hit their family.\u00a0 This was almost two years ago now.\u00a0 They\u2019ll unpack the story for us tomorrow.\u00a0 I hope you can be here to hear it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today Keith Lynch and our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today\u00ae<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife<em>\u00ae<\/em> of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today, Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts for you. However, there is a cost to transcribe, create, and produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>www.FamilyLife.com<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/301968","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=301968"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=301968"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=301968"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=301968"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=301968"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=301968"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=301968"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}