{"id":301907,"date":"2009-10-22T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2009-10-22T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/discipline-from-three-to-four-years\/"},"modified":"2009-10-22T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2009-10-22T15:00:00","slug":"discipline-from-three-to-four-years","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/discipline-from-three-to-four-years\/","title":{"rendered":"Discipline from Three to Four Years"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The toddler years are often considered some of the most difficult.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2009-10-22.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"18.83M","filesize_raw":"19748257","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2852,2881],"tags":[4759,4994],"podcast_series":[],"cwp_profile":[3052,3048],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-301907","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-discipline","category-young-children","tag-discipline","tag-first-baby","cwp_profile-barbara-rainey","cwp_profile-dennis-rainey","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/301907\/discipline-from-three-to-four-years","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/301907\/discipline-from-three-to-four-years","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"KagrXDZMLR\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/discipline-from-three-to-four-years\/\">Discipline from Three to Four Years<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/discipline-from-three-to-four-years\/embed\/#?secret=KagrXDZMLR\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Discipline from Three to Four Years&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"KagrXDZMLR\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg",508,508,false]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"kfairris@familylife.com","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/kfairrisfamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"The toddler years are often considered some of the most difficult.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2009-10-22.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well here from session four of this series are Dennis and Barbara Rainey <em>Right From the Start<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHere on the subject of discipline when you\u2019ve got a little baby who can\u2019t crawl or walk or really talk, discipline is kind of simple and basic. But as soon as your baby becomes mobile, can start to talk back, the complexity level starts to increase doesn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You move from little league to the minor leagues.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>(laughter) The majors are still ahead.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I just want to show you what the minor league looks like. I ran across this a number of years ago and I chuckle every time I read this, it\u2019s called The Toddlers Creed. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe Toddlers Creed \u201cIf I want it its mine; if I give it to you and change my mind later, its mine; If I can take it away from you it\u2019s mine; if I had it a little while ago it\u2019s mine.\u00a0 If we\u2019re building something together all the pieces are mine.\u00a0 If it looks like mine it\u2019s mine.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEverything is mine is what he\u2019s saying.\u00a0 I think it\u2019s a wise parent who realize The Toddlers Creed is really a reflection of their heart and that heart needs to be trained and needs to ultimately be introduced to who Jesus Christ is and who God is and how His authority relates to his life and then help him enter into relationship .\u00a0 But in the mean time you are in essence filling the role of in the authority figure in your toddlers life and helping him learn how to respond properly to authority.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>When a child can begin to move and can begin to speak and begin to say no defiantly, disobediently. It\u2019s a new day of parenting, isn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>It is a new day and you know, you start thinking about what toddlers can get into. It\u2019s just astounding the confrontations that can be had with a toddler.\u00a0 All of a sudden when a baby starts walking they can reach pans on the stove, they can reach dishes on the table, they can climb on chairs and counter tops and tables.\u00a0 They can play in the water in the toilet, they can eat the dog food.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I mean you start thinking about the things that are available to a toddler that were not available for him to get into just a few months prior. So, all of a sudden the stakes have changed.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you have a toddler who is able to get around on his own two feet and as parents you need to decide.\u00a0 What are we going to do about all of those issues that are now potentially available to our toddler? What will we remove?\u00a0 What will we discipline and train for? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Did you child proof your home? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>We did a lot of child proofing. We decided also we weren\u2019t going to make our house\u00a0 romper room and get rid of every adult feature.\u00a0 They had to learn to respect the things that were not theirs to play with.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 We\u2019ll talk more about this later that it\u2019s better to have fewer rules than too many. So, what we try to do is strike a balance there, in terms of child proofing our home and also making it adult friendly as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 A lot of people look at this phase of a child\u2019s life as the beginning of the terrible two\u2019s but you don\u2019t see it as the terrible two\u2019s, do you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong>\u00a0 No. I decided when I was raising our kids to call it the training two\u2019s because it really is a time of very intense parental training in the life of toddlers and two year olds.\u00a0 Because there are so many things they can get into and places they can go that they have not been able to before. The learning curve is so steep for a toddler that it really is a time of very intense training for your child.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is the time when corporal punishment spanking may start to get used a little more regularly in the life of a child.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 No doubt about it.\u00a0 Here again, is where fewer things rather than more things are better. So, we reduced it down to four things that we spanked for in this age group. First of all, physical aggression, where there was pushing, hitting, biting, pinching, anything that was attempting to hurt another child or another person, including adults.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ve got some e-mails from listeners to our broadcast, where adults are allowing their children to hit them. And you can\u2019t do that. You\u2019ve got to take action on that and help the child begin to understand that\u2019s inappropriate.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSecondly: Willful disobedience. It\u2019s that look in the eye or the turning of the back and ignoring and passively choosing not to do what been asked of them. By the way, this is when it begins to become difficult.\u00a0 It becomes increasingly difficult later on during the three to five age range when the kids get more sophisticated in this. Somewhere in this age range they begin to find out that we can just ignore mom and tell her we didn\u2019t hear her and we didn\u2019t know she wanted us to do that. They ignore the commands or the directives.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThird: Sassiness or disrespect, where there is just an attitude of the heart that is punitive toward the person in authority. That would be toward you as a parent, maybe a Sunday school teacher or a neighbor but any attitude that is expressed by a toddler, I think needs to be dealt with by the parent.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen the Fourth are situations of danger. You know we already listed a bunch of these around the electrical outlets and things that a child can get into that are dangerous. I think as a parent you have to determine what that is and what\u2019s important there but clearly spell those out for your child. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, it won\u2019t be an age, like exactly at two. When you set your child down and begin to spell this out. Somewhere in the 18 months to the 30 month range, your child\u2019s going to go through a self discovery phase where they realize they have a will, and it\u2019s a different will than yours. That that will can sometimes win. It\u2019s a power play. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd that\u2019s why you bring these four things to them and you explain to them, you know what? Here are the four things that mommy and daddy will simply not allow you to do. It\u2019s a little bit like Barbara\u2019s instruction around taking the child down to the street.\u00a0 Not if but when they test you.\u00a0 You point out the wrong behavior, that\u2019s called reproof. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou correct that child; bring them back on the highway. That\u2019s the discipline aspect of spanking or of another form perhaps, and you continue to train in the direction they need to go. All those components come together around these four things.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Barbara, this is the period of time where you would move from using your hand to using a different implement for spanking?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>We did because I realize spanking with my hand was not producing the right kind of pain or enough pain to cause them to want to comply, so we graduated to a wooden spoon at\u00a0 about the time they all turned two.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur son and daughter-n-law don\u2019t use a wooden spoon. They use this leather strap that a friend of theirs had made. It\u2019s about 12 inches long. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>It pops too.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong>\u00a0 It really does pop.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>We\u2019ve never used it but\u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong>\u00a0 We watch them use it.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Explain to us what a good spanking is going to look like start to finish.\u00a0 How would you go about the process?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Some of these we\u2019ve already kind of mentioned but I\u2019m going to go through them real quickly.\u00a0 One of the things that we always were committed to doing was spanking our children in private so we would always take them into another room so we didn\u2019t have an audience.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe talked earlier about not spanking in anger so that is another component to a good spanking that is profitable.\u00a0 We\u2019ve talked about making sure there is pain that the child feels and if they don\u2019t feel pain then you may have to administer it a second time because the goal is for them to associate the pain with the offense with what they did wrong so they will be motivated to avoid experiencing pain again in the future.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ve talked about communicating clearly that you love your child and that you are doing this because you love them and you want to train them into how to live rightly.\u00a0 Another thing I think is helpful is try to use biblical terminology so that they begin to understand.\u00a0 Use words like selfish and say mommy saw that you were being very selfish with your toys and you were not sharing.\u00a0 God wants us to be kind.\u00a0 It helps you identify the issues of the heart if you can begin to practice naming things the way they are named in Scripture.\u00a0 This will enable the child to begin understand his behavior in association with his heart attitude.\u00a0 Ultimately you are trying to correct his heart not just his behavior.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen you spank him and after you spank him if he struggles or fights being spanked which we talked about earlier in response to a question you may need to spank him again.\u00a0\u00a0 I also shared about the time when one of our children was older probably five I told this daughter that she was going to get a spanking and to meet me downstairs in the living room because I had to go find the spoon by the way our kids started hiding wooden spoons, so I found the spoon and met her in the living room.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI said come over here and sit by me and when she came over and sat by me I thought she looked a little like she had gained a little weight.\u00a0 She had gone upstairs and put on six or seven pairs of panties under her jeans because she thought that would be really smart and that I wouldn\u2019t notice and therefore it wouldn\u2019t hurt.\u00a0 Kids can be very creative in trying to avoid the pain but they must feel the pain for it to do any good.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen at the end we always prayed with our children.\u00a0 We prayed for them.\u00a0 We prayed that they would come to know Jesus as their Savior some day.\u00a0 We prayed that they would learn to understand what it meant to obey God and to follow Him with their whole heart for all of their lives.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs they got older and could pray we asked them to pray as well and helped them articulate to God that they had sinned against mommy and daddy.\u00a0 They had disobeyed and will you forgive me.\u00a0 We were training them in communicating a relationship with God.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLastly, if the offense involved another person like hitting a sibling or taking or jerking a toy away from a friend we always made our child go and apologize and say I\u2019m sorry I hit you.\u00a0 Will you forgive me for hitting you or I\u2019m sorry I took your toy.\u00a0 You may have it back will you forgive me for taking your toy.\u00a0 We helped them verbalize to that person that they had wronged exactly what they had done so they learned to own that responsibility of owning their behavior and their mistakes.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>You were specific about that apology as well.\u00a0 You didn\u2019t just let them say sorry.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Absolutely not.\u00a0 They wanted to.\u00a0 They wanted to just blow it off especially when they got older and go do I have to go through all this?\u00a0 We\u2019d say yes, you do.\u00a0 It\u2019s important that you say what you did and that you own up to the responsibility of your offense.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>At the point the child has done something wrong and again the younger the child the closer the discipline needs to be to the time of the offense.\u00a0 You can\u2019t delay a spanking for an 18 month old child like you can for a five year old.\u00a0 You can use the delay actually as a part of the discipline with a five year old.\u00a0 Go upstairs and wait until your dad comes home.\u00a0 That is a good tool to use\u2014time.\u00a0 But the younger the child the closer it needs to be.\u00a0 Take the child in your lap and tell them you love them.\u00a0 I always liked to think of it as the bookends of love.\u00a0 You tell them you love them at the beginning before you spank them and you tell them you love them at the end because the whole thing is bathed in love.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s all about training and helping the child become a better person.\u00a0 It\u2019s interesting.\u00a0 The whole process will continue on into adolescents.\u00a0 When you discipline your teenagers and you tell them that these boundaries are for your sake.\u00a0 We are doing this because we love you.\u00a0 We wish we could allow you to do all of these things but we can\u2019t.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou take your child in your lap and tell them what they did.\u00a0 If it is appropriate and they are old enough to articulate it they articulate what they did wrong.\u00a0 You take them in your lap and turn them over and at that point if they fight you that is where you implement the second spanking for fighting you.\u00a0 They have to receive the discipline for the appropriate offense.\u00a0 They cry and you put them back on your lap and you hold them.\u00a0 Sometimes we would hold our children for a long time before we ended the time of discipline.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think those moments are really important moments to sing to and pray over your child.\u00a0 Tell them you love them.\u00a0 Tell them they are going to grow up to become a great young lady or great young man and these are just hard times they need to be trained in.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen as Barbara said we prayed with them.\u00a0 They were off and running and sometimes that whole process for a child was repeated over and over and over again in a single day and I would come home and I would find Barbara and she would be tied up.\u00a0 Not physically but emotionally because of the exhaustion.\u00a0 A part of this list we gave you came from a time where I came home and found Barbara and I didn\u2019t know what to do.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think all I can do is spank them.\u00a0 Let\u2019s pull back and let\u2019s evaluate what all the options were.\u00a0 We literally created a discipline chart of all the various ways we could train our children without having to spank.\u00a0 We taped it on the inside of the cabinet where it remained for who knows how\u00a0 many years just to give her a number of options to look at in the middle of the battle with six children under foot.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOne of the reasons why we lose as parents is we don\u2019t take the job seriously enough to pull aside from the battle on that date night on Sunday night and talk about what is happening here.\u00a0 What is our game plan?\u00a0 Let\u2019s stick to it.\u00a0 When we drop her off at the nursery on Sunday morning we are going to tell her in advance that we are going to drop her off.\u00a0 If she wants to cry she can cry but we are walking away.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>I think one of the important things that you point out is that you have to persevere in correcting but you also have to persevere in instruction.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 As parents we think it\u2019s correct, correct, correct but the ongoing instruction and remind that this is the standard.\u00a0 This is what we expect in the cool of the moment when you get to the grocery store you say now we are about to go into the grocery store let me reinstruct you on what is appropriate in the grocery store.\u00a0\u00a0 We are about to go to church let me reinstruct you about what we expect at church.\u00a0 The ongoing repetitive nature of instruction along with the ongoing correction is how you eventually get the child where you want the child to be.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Exactly.\u00a0 I think that is what is so wearying to parents is the repetitive nature because you do it so much.\u00a0 You think how many times do I have to say this before they will ever get it?\u00a0 Because they are little you have to do that.\u00a0 Our tendency is to think I\u2019ve already explained this ten times and I shouldn\u2019t have to explain this again.\u00a0 It needs to be explained over and over again just like the correction needs to be done over and over again and they need to be tied together.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 One of the reflections I had as we met with a number of couples as we were producing this series it was a great reminder to me of the days when Mary Ann and I were bringing our first children through the early childhood years.\u00a0 We were clueless and we didn\u2019t remember what our parents had done when we were two and three and four years old.\u00a0 Maybe we had sketchy memories and we\u2019d never done it before so the issues of discipline and what to do as a parent we needed mentoring and counsel and support and training just like our children need to be instructed and to be trained.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI thought to myself as we met with these young parents I wish we had information like this when we were young parents.\u00a0 Of course that is the reason we put together the <em>Right From the Start<\/em> DVD series with Dennis and Barbara so that a group of young parents or an individual mom and dad or an entire church can sit down and go through this material together.\u00a0\u00a0 They can talk about getting a game plan together to make sure mom and dad are on the same page in terms of how they are going to handle discipline in the home with toddlers and with preschoolers.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you are interested in finding out about this DVD series we\u2019ve just been able to feature portions of the audio this week but you can actually see some of the clips on line at FamilyLife Today.com.\u00a0 You can order the entire DVD series from us.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can also call if you\u2019d like more information, or if you\u2019d like to place an order over the phone 1-800 FL-TODAY is the number\u20141-800-358-6329.\u00a0 That\u2019s 1-800 \u2013 F as in \u201cfamily\u201d L as in \u201clife\u201d and then the word TODAY.\u00a0 When you get in touch with us someone on our team can answer any questions you have about this DVD series sent to you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNext month <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> will celebrate 17 years of producing this program.\u00a0 Over the past 17 years we have had the opportunity to tackle a wide variety of subjects some of them things that every family faces and every marriage experiences.\u00a0 Some of them are unique issues and challenges that not every family faces but when a family does confront an issue like an eating disorder or a suicide or drug use in the family or a marital affair things like that can be devastating for any family.\u00a0 We have tried over the years to provide our listeners and now those folks who come to FamilyLife Today.com with a wide variety of practical, biblical help for any issue you might face in your marriage and in your family.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to take a minute and thank all of the people who have made all of this possible and that is those of you who have supported this ministry with your donations.\u00a0 We could not do what we do without the faithful financial support of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> listeners.\u00a0 Those of you who have benefitted from this program and have either picked up the phone or gone on line to make a donation to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> we want to say thank you for that financial support and for partnering with us in this ministry.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis month if you\u2019re able to make a donation of any amount for the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>we\u2019d like to say thank you.\u00a0 To do that we have an audio book that we want to make available to you:\u00a0 It\u2019s the audio version of Barbara Rainey\u2019s book <em>Thanksgiving:<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em><em>A Time to Remember<\/em>.\u00a0 We have heard from many of our listeners over the last several years who have enjoyed not only the book but this audio book that is read by a dramatic actor.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain the <em>Thanksgiving:<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em><em>A Time to Remember<\/em> audio book is our way of saying thank you this month when you support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>with a donation of any amount.\u00a0 You can do that on line at FamilyLifeToday.com \u2013 if you are on line, and you\u2019re filling out the donation form type the word \u201cTHANKSGIVING\u201d in the key code box that you see on the donation form, and that will alert us to the fact that you\u2019d like to receive the Thanksgiving CD\u2019s.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen you make your donation over the phone, just make sure to ask for the Thanksgiving audio book, and again we\u2019re happy to send it out to you.\u00a0 We very much appreciate your financial partnership with this ministry.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow tomorrow we are going to move from the minor leagues of discipline into the major leagues of dealing with the toddler issues.\u00a0 I hope you can be back with us for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today Keith Lynch and our entire broadcast production team on behalf of our host Dennis Rainey I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock Arkansas.\u00a0 Help for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a9 2009 FamilyLife\n\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/301907","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=301907"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=301907"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=301907"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=301907"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=301907"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=301907"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=301907"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}