{"id":301855,"date":"2009-07-06T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2009-07-06T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/descending-into-the-valley\/"},"modified":"2009-07-06T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2009-07-06T15:00:00","slug":"descending-into-the-valley","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/descending-into-the-valley\/","title":{"rendered":"Descending Into the Valley"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Do you believe in God\u2019s goodness even when bad things happen?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2009-07-06.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"12.13M","filesize_raw":"12714785","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2847,10442],"tags":[4932,4780,2605,2216],"podcast_series":[7657],"cwp_profile":[9167],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-301855","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-death-and-dying","category-death-of-a-spouse","tag-difficulty","tag-losing-a-spouse","tag-sickness","tag-suffering","podcast_series-a-grace-disguised","cwp_profile-jerry-sittser","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/301855\/descending-into-the-valley","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/301855\/descending-into-the-valley","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"4KOOVy8j6m\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/descending-into-the-valley\/\">Descending Into the Valley<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/descending-into-the-valley\/embed\/#?secret=4KOOVy8j6m\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Descending Into the Valley&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"4KOOVy8j6m\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2009-07-06.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2009-07-06.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor Jerry Sittser one of those events occurred in 1991 when he and his wife and their four children and Jerry\u2019s mother were hit head on by a vehicle traveling at 85 miles per hour.\u00a0 The collision was fatal for Jerry\u2019s wife and for his mom and for one of his four children.\u00a0 As Jerry reflects back on that event today he sees it as something that was ultimately faith affirming.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 Through a long and often difficult journey I really did discover the Christian faith is true.\u00a0 Grace really is available to get us through these hard stretches of life.\u00a0 The ultimate message of Christianity is not self help it is God\u2019s help.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday July 6<sup>th<\/sup>.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We\u2019ll hear today how a tragic car accident can be a grace disguised.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWelcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us.\u00a0 You and I were having a conversation not long ago with Dr. Al Moeller, the President of Southern Seminary and we asked him about questions he gets thrown by the secular media.\u00a0 We said the tough questions are the ones they ask you.\u00a0 What are the ones that put you on the spot?\u00a0 Without even thinking he said we always come back to the issue of the problem of evil and suffering.\u00a0 How can there be a good God when there is suffering in the world?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 We don\u2019t always know what God is up to.\u00a0 He is God and we are not.\u00a0 We have a guest with us today on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> that I think is going to minister to a lot of our listeners.\u00a0 Actually I was introduced to this guest by my wife Barbara, who joins us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> as well.\u00a0 Welcome Sweetie.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara Rainey:<\/strong>\u00a0 Thanks.\u00a0 I\u2019m glad to be here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Jerry Sittser has written this book <em>A Grace Disguised<\/em> which is a story out of his own life and it occurred a number of years ago.\u00a0 Jerry lives in Spokane Washington up in the eastern section of that great state.\u00a0 He is a professor of theology at Whitworth University and has a Masters of Divinity from Fuller Theological Seminary and has his doctorate in history from the University of Chicago.\u00a0 This leaves me with only one question Jerry, White Sox or Cubs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Or were you there long enough to even care?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Oh he had to be if he had his PHD.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Dodgers!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, I do welcome you to the broadcast and I am grateful for you writing this book, <em>A Grace Disguised<\/em>.\u00a0 I want Barbara to share with our listeners to help put in context out of which she gave me Jerry\u2019s book.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Was this something somebody gave you as a gift?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong>\u00a0 It was a book that someone had recommended to me a number of years ago.\u00a0 I bought it and started reading it and it was in my library.\u00a0 But I didn\u2019t finish the book until last summer after our granddaughter Molly was born and only lived seven days and then died.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs we began to try to make sense of what God had done and what He was up to I pulled that book off the shelf.\u00a0 This time I had a real heart for it.\u00a0 I needed it.\u00a0 I read it all the way through and I was constantly underlining and reading portions of it to Dennis and saying \u201clisten to what this says.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI bought several copies and gave one to a couple of my daughters.\u00a0 I gave one to Molly\u2019s mother, Rebecca, and a couple of our other daughters, too.\u00a0 I said you need to have this in your library and if you don\u2019t read it all the way through right now you will read it eventually.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It is really a love story of sorts that started when you met your wife Linda.\u00a0 How did you meet her, Jerry?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 I was a student at Hope College and she was a student at Hope College in Holland, Michigan.\u00a0 After I experienced a conversion between my sophomore and junior year we became very good friends.\u00a0 Really best friends.\u00a0 One day I was standing in a group of people and somebody got my attention from maybe 100 yards away and I turned and said something to them I\u2019m sure.\u00a0 I was a little cocky back then.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLinda was in that circle and I turned back and our eyes met and that was it right there.\u00a0 I just fell in love on the spot.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You were smitten.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 Oh, my goodness was I smitten.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 But you\u2019d known her for months before this?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser<\/strong>:\u00a0 We were very good friends, yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 So what in that moment you don\u2019t know?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 I don\u2019t know but our eyes met and it was just different.\u00a0 So I asked her out a few days later and we were married eight months later.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u00a0No, no, no.\u00a0 I want to know how you asked her to marry you because it has to be a great story.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, we went up to some property that my family owned off the Grand River up in the hills.\u00a0 We made a day of it and did some hiking and I had hidden a family heirloom a little silver container with the engagement ring inside it.\u00a0 That also was the family stone.\u00a0 I asked her to marry me.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You were married for 20 years.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 Twenty years\u2014just shy of 20 years and we had four children.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 She was a homeschooler and she enjoyed teaching your kids.\u00a0 Taking them on field trips, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>She was a multitalented woman.\u00a0 She was very bright.\u00a0 She was a professional musician and singer.\u00a0 She was the choir director and the director of the professional children\u2019s choir in Spokane and a paid soloist at our home church and also a homeschooler. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You were on a field trip where you went to Idaho and it was not a normal field trip that you would think of when you think of homeschoolers.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser: <\/strong>\u00a0She had just completed a unit on Native American cultures to my two oldest who were being homeschooled at the time.\u00a0 We went on a field trip to a Native American powwow.\u00a0 We had dinner with the tribal leaders and had a wonderful time and wonderful conversation.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIronically one of the topics that came up was the curse of alcoholism in the tribe and the violence that often resulted from it.\u00a0 They spoke with great pain over that.\u00a0 These were really wonderful people.\u00a0 Some fine Christian people.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAfter the dinner with them we went to the powwow and enjoyed it.\u00a0 My two daughters who were then eight and four actually went out and danced with the tribe for a while.\u00a0 I continued my conversation with Linda and several of the tribal leaders until about 8:30 and then we decided to go home.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Now this was 1991?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 1991 September 27. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u00a0 And you were there with your wife and four children plus your own mom.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 My mom came for the weekend.\u00a0 She and my wife were going to go dress shopping for a new dress for a solo performance she was going to be doing of the Messiah in December.\u00a0 Typical for my mom she brought 12 quarts of frozen blueberries packed in ice.\u00a0 It was so typical for what she would do.\u00a0 She was a wonderful woman, a great grandma, and a great mom.\u00a0 She was very close to our family.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You had gone to Idaho for this field trip and you decided to head back home to Spokane at that point?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser: <\/strong>\u00a0We did.\u00a0 It was dark out obviously and on a lonely stretch of highway only about 10 minutes from where the powwow was held I noticed a car coming on at a really rapid rate of speed.\u00a0 It slowed down just a little bit at a curve and so I was alert to this.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWithout any warning he just drove right into me.\u00a0 He missed the curve and plowed head on at 85 miles per hour.\u00a0 In fact it was so head on that his car cart wheeled over ours.\u00a0 So it didn\u2019t roll it cart wheeled down the highway.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt was awful.\u00a0 In the wake of that accident as soon as I could I collected myself.\u00a0 I was not injured seriously just bruised and that sort of thing.\u00a0 I looked around and knew that it was really bad.\u00a0 My mother who was sitting way in the back was seriously injured.\u00a0 My four year old I could tell was dead.\u00a0 She had a broken neck.\u00a0 I tried to get a pulse and did mouth to mouth but it was hopeless.\u00a0 I could tell my wife, Linda, was catastrophically injured, too.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy other kids were dazed, crying, and screaming.\u00a0 It was chaotic.\u00a0 All the windows were broken out of the car.\u00a0 My door could open and I got the kids out who were mobile.\u00a0 Katherine was eight and John was six and David was two.\u00a0 I found out later that John had a broken femur and some other injuries but the other two kids were just bruised but okay.\u00a0 I went back to try to tend to Linda.\u00a0 I got a pulse but knew she wasn\u2019t going to live because her injuries were just too severe.\u00a0 I did mouth to mouth on Diana Jane but she was gone.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI got to my mother only briefly but then something beautiful happened.\u00a0 You find these flowers in the midst of ashes almost right away.\u00a0 People began to stop.\u00a0 The scene was chaotic.\u00a0 The driver survived but his wife who was nine months pregnant died and the unborn baby died as well.\u00a0 There were five casualties in the accident.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSome guy got out of the car and went over to my mother and reached out to her through the broken window and held her hand and stroked her arm until she died.\u00a0 That is a beautiful act of grace to me.\u00a0 It was very courageous of him in the midst of that chaos and that violence to break through that with mercy and love.\u00a0 I wish I knew who that man was because I\u2019d like to thank him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 What a surreal moment that had to be for you.\u00a0 Almost like you\u2019ve stepped out of time and space and your body\u2026I don\u2019t know how to describe it other than just surreal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, it was surreal.\u00a0 I have such vivid memories to this day.\u00a0\u00a0 Nothing has faded at all.\u00a0 First it was a nightmare to have those kinds of memories.\u00a0 It\u2019s not so bad anymore because it\u2019s been integrated into the landscape of my life.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t haunt me like it used to.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe waited a long time before emergency vehicles came and they took over.\u00a0 I got to a phone as soon as I could to call my sister to say something unspeakable had happened.\u00a0 After about an hour the survivors, namely my three children Katherine, John and David and I were all put in the same emergency vehicle and were transported another hour up to Coeur d\u2019Alene for emergency care.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat one hour was probably the most significant hour in my life.\u00a0 It really was the turning point for me.\u00a0 It was like a wormhole from one reality to another.\u00a0 Honestly it\u2019s the most accurate way I can describe it.\u00a0 Time ceased to have meaning.\u00a0 It could have been ten years.\u00a0 That period of time is frozen in my memory and it was probably the most rational moment I\u2019ve ever had in my life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt was quiet.\u00a0 John was sedated.\u00a0 The other kids were whimpering but it was quiet.\u00a0 The emergency personnel didn\u2019t say anything and I had one hour to just be.\u00a0 I thought about the accident and the scene.\u00a0 I knew what had happened and I thought of what would be as a result.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI considered the task set before me.\u00a0 I had a burden that was placed on my shoulders and in a sense a divine mandate that said you draw a line in the sand right now and decide what you want to be and what you want to come from this experience.\u00a0 And I did.\u00a0 I said, I want the bleeding to stop right here.\u00a0 This is it.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want to do things that are going to set in motion more and more pain and more and more bleeding that could go on for generations.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI made the basic decision right then and there that I was going to somehow by the grace of God respond and live this story out in a way that was going to be redemptive.\u00a0 Redemption was really the key term that just kept coming back to me.\u00a0 Redemption.\u00a0 This is not the final word.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I want out listeners to hear what\u2019s wrapped up in your statement because you make this statement in your book.\u00a0 You said loss does not have to be the defining moment in our lives instead the defining moment can be our response to that loss.\u00a0 It\u2019s not what happens to us that matters so much as what happens in us.\u00a0 You really believe that don\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser: <\/strong>\u00a0I do believe it by the grace of God.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t write a self help book here.\u00a0 I don\u2019t believe that.\u00a0 The ultimate message of Christianity is not self help it is God\u2019s help.\u00a0 Through a long and often difficult journey I really did discover that the Christian faith is true.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGrace really is available to get us through these hard stretches of life.\u00a0 My response of choosing to trust the grace of God was far more significant than the event itself.\u00a0 You know my kids would say the same thing today.\u00a0 They would say that the accident is actually not that significant.\u00a0 It is what\u2019s come out of it that is significant.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 What seems remarkable to me as you describe this hour of rational clarity is the absence of grief.\u00a0 I think of someone living through what you have just lived through and I would think this person would be a grieving basket case.\u00a0 It\u2019s not that you didn\u2019t experience grief.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, I did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Do you think this was kind of a shock response or was this the grace of God giving you this moment of clarity to prepare you for what was ahead? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 I suppose you could say there was some shock involved in it but Bob, there was something more than that honestly.\u00a0 I look back on it this day with a sense of wonder.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t simply that I had not absorbed the significance.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI knew what had happened to me.\u00a0\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t even as if I was holding it off.\u00a0 I think God gave me that gift.\u00a0 I think He gave me one hour to decide what I was going to believe and where I was going to head and I walked out of that emergency vehicle in Coeur d\u2019Alene into a different world.\u00a0 I collapsed.\u00a0 It was hard going for a long time.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Can I ask the two of you did you experience anything similar to that, Barbara, in going through what you went through with the death of Molly?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong>\u00a0 I think we did but it wasn\u2019t anywhere near as dramatic as what Jerry was describing.\u00a0 We watched our kids and as we watched them respond to the news that Molly was not going to live they had a choice to make in those first moments.\u00a0 I think those early moments of facing tragedy and loss in a crisis like that are the defining moments.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey decided they were going to believe God.\u00a0 They were going to believe that He was good and that He was sufficient and that He knew what He was doing.\u00a0 That really set the course for them from there on out.\u00a0 So I think in the moment of crisis I think God gives us that opportunity to choose.\u00a0 Do we believe Him or not?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I like what Barbara said about defining a course because that\u2019s different from solving all the problems.\u00a0 When you suffer a loss whether it be divorce or terminal illness or loss of a job it can be other things that are a little less dramatic and tragic.\u00a0 I think we do have the power to set a course and that makes a huge difference over a long period of time.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t solve all the problems but it gets us going in a particular direction.\u00a0 I think I did that by the grace of God.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know people or have met people who just dissolved in their moment of pain and didn\u2019t have that rational clarity that you described.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 I think what happens is we give some kind of tragedy more power than it deserves.\u00a0 It does become the defining moment instead of the response being the defining moment.\u00a0 It\u2019s the thing itself and then pretty soon it\u2019s affecting other relationships.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s affecting life habits that we form and 20 or 30 years later that divorce or loss or whatever continues to dominate our lives.\u00a0 That\u2019s what I call the second death and it\u2019s actually worse than the initial death.\u00a0 Far worse than the loss of Linda and my mom and Diana Jane would have been say the loss my children would have experienced in my bitterness.\u00a0 In fact I have an interesting story to tell you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAbout six months or a year after the accident I got an anonymous telephone call from a young woman who said, \u201cMr. Sittser I want to tell you my story.\u00a0 When I was a young girl my mother died of cancer and I\u2019ve been in therapy for six years.\u00a0 I thought to myself this is not a helpful conversation she said no let me continue my story.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cI\u2019m in therapy not because I lost my mother but I lost my father at the same time and he is still alive. He became non functional and so overcome with grief and bitterness that I lost both parents but my dad is still alive.\u00a0 She said, don\u2019t let that happen to you\u201d and she hung up the phone.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow she didn\u2019t give me new information but it was a wonderful reminder to me that the role I was playing was significant.\u00a0 By my own attitude and spirit I was setting a course and I was giving cues to my children.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You are also making choices for your own life that are going to determine who you become as a man.\u00a0 I think of the listeners who have eavesdropped today in terms of hearing this story.\u00a0 I wonder what they are facing because all of us experience loss.\u00a0 If you live long enough you will experience loss.\u00a0 The Bible is a very lofty book but it\u2019s also a very gritty book that meets us in the midst of our grief.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou made a statement Jerry that I want to underline.\u00a0 I really understand why a loss can become central to our lives and why the grief that surrounds it can become the defining moment.\u00a0 It hurts.\u00a0 It is terrible.\u00a0 As you describe it it\u2019s catastrophic but I like what you did in your book.\u00a0 You called us away from the focus on the circumstances to focus on the God of all grace and mercy who can bring hope and healing.\u00a0 He can keep us from becoming embittered in that process.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Barbara, in the weeks that followed in the birth and death of your granddaughter Molly you had a lot of people send you quotes and recommend articles or books.\u00a0 This book was the one God used most powerfully, wasn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 It was.\u00a0\u00a0 There were other things, too, but this was the book that I read through that really resonated in my soul.\u00a0 Jerry talked about not just the loss of death but all kinds of loss and how our identity is wrapped up in how we respond to that loss.\u00a0 It was really profound in my life.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I think both of you will be encouraged to know that we have a lot of listeners over the last several weeks who have contacted us to get a copy of Jerry\u2019s book called <em>A Grace Disguised<\/em>.\u00a0 We still have copies in our FamilyLife Resource Center.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can go to our web site FamilyLifeToday.com and find information about Jerry\u2019s book which is called <em>A Grace Disguised:<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em><em>How the Soul Grows Through Loss.<\/em>\u00a0 You\u2019ll find it available there along with copies of the book that you\u2019ve just finished writing Barbara along with your daughter Rebecca called <em>A Symphony in the Dark<\/em>:<em> Hearing God\u2019s Voice in Seasons of Grief<\/em>.\u00a0 It focuses in on the events of a year ago when your granddaughter Molly was born and lived for seven days and how your family processed that season of grief.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain both of these books are available from us at <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Go to our web site FamilyLife Today.com.\u00a0 You can order online from us if you\u2019d like or if it\u2019s easier call 1-800-FL-TODAY.\u00a0 That\u2019s 1-800-358-6329.\u00a0 That\u2019s 1 800 \u201cF\u201das in family \u201cL\u201d as in life and then the word TODAY and we can make arrangements to have whichever of these books you\u2019d like or both of them sent out to you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe also want to take a couple of minutes and say thanks to those of you who help underwrite this daily radio program.\u00a0 Your financial support of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is what keeps this program on the air.\u00a0 It helps defray the costs of production and syndication to keep this program on more than a thousand radio stations and outlets all across the country.\u00a0 It is available online and audio streaming and as a podcast.\u00a0 Thanks to those of you who help make that happen by making donations on a regular basis for the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis month if you\u2019re able to help with a donation of any amount to the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> we have a CD we\u2019d like to send you.\u00a0 This CD features a conversation we had several months ago with Nancy Leigh DeMoss the popular author and speaker and the host of the daily radio program, <em>Revive Our Hearts<\/em>.\u00a0 Our conversation was on the subject of forgiveness and what the Bible says about forgiveness.\u00a0 Nancy has written a great book called <em>Choosing Forgiveness<\/em> and I know that this is a subject that a lot of people struggle with.\u00a0 Jerry you addressed it in your book <em>A Grace Disguised<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis CD is our way of saying thank you to you this month when you support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> with a donation of any amount.\u00a0 If you\u2019re making that donation online at FamilyLifeToday.com all you have to do is type the word \u201cforgive\u201d in the key code box on the donation form and we\u2019ll know to send a copy of the CD to you. Or call toll-free 1 800 FLTODAY.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMake your donation over the phone and just ask for the CD on forgiveness or the CD with Nancy Leigh DeMoss.\u00a0 Again we are happy to send it to you and we do appreciate your support of this ministry.\u00a0 Thanks for partnering with us.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTomorrow we\u2019re going to talk about life getting back to normal after a catastrophic event like the one Jerry Sittser experienced almost two decades ago now.\u00a0 We\u2019ll find out if life ever does get back to normal or if it\u2019s just a new normal.\u00a0 I hope you can join us for that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today Keith Lynch and our entire broadcast production team on behalf of our host Dennis Rainey I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a9 2009 FamilyLife\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to transcribe, create, and produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/site\/c.dnJHKLNnFoG\/b.3782043\/k.384D\/Support_Us.htm\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["12.13M"],"filesize_raw":["12714785"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-301855.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-301855.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__video-wrap video{opacity: 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you believe in God\u2019s goodness even when bad things happen?","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2009-07-06.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor Jerry Sittser one of those events occurred in 1991 when he and his wife and their four children and Jerry\u2019s mother were hit head on by a vehicle traveling at 85 miles per hour.\u00a0 The collision was fatal for Jerry\u2019s wife and for his mom and for one of his four children.\u00a0 As Jerry reflects back on that event today he sees it as something that was ultimately faith affirming.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 Through a long and often difficult journey I really did discover the Christian faith is true.\u00a0 Grace really is available to get us through these hard stretches of life.\u00a0 The ultimate message of Christianity is not self help it is God\u2019s help.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday July 6<sup>th<\/sup>.\u00a0 Our host is the President of FamilyLife Dennis Rainey, and I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We\u2019ll hear today how a tragic car accident can be a grace disguised.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWelcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Thanks for joining us.\u00a0 You and I were having a conversation not long ago with Dr. Al Moeller, the President of Southern Seminary and we asked him about questions he gets thrown by the secular media.\u00a0 We said the tough questions are the ones they ask you.\u00a0 What are the ones that put you on the spot?\u00a0 Without even thinking he said we always come back to the issue of the problem of evil and suffering.\u00a0 How can there be a good God when there is suffering in the world?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 We don\u2019t always know what God is up to.\u00a0 He is God and we are not.\u00a0 We have a guest with us today on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> that I think is going to minister to a lot of our listeners.\u00a0 Actually I was introduced to this guest by my wife Barbara, who joins us on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> as well.\u00a0 Welcome Sweetie.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara Rainey:<\/strong>\u00a0 Thanks.\u00a0 I\u2019m glad to be here.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Jerry Sittser has written this book <em>A Grace Disguised<\/em> which is a story out of his own life and it occurred a number of years ago.\u00a0 Jerry lives in Spokane Washington up in the eastern section of that great state.\u00a0 He is a professor of theology at Whitworth University and has a Masters of Divinity from Fuller Theological Seminary and has his doctorate in history from the University of Chicago.\u00a0 This leaves me with only one question Jerry, White Sox or Cubs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Or were you there long enough to even care?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Oh he had to be if he had his PHD.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>Dodgers!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, I do welcome you to the broadcast and I am grateful for you writing this book, <em>A Grace Disguised<\/em>.\u00a0 I want Barbara to share with our listeners to help put in context out of which she gave me Jerry\u2019s book.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Was this something somebody gave you as a gift?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong>\u00a0 It was a book that someone had recommended to me a number of years ago.\u00a0 I bought it and started reading it and it was in my library.\u00a0 But I didn\u2019t finish the book until last summer after our granddaughter Molly was born and only lived seven days and then died.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs we began to try to make sense of what God had done and what He was up to I pulled that book off the shelf.\u00a0 This time I had a real heart for it.\u00a0 I needed it.\u00a0 I read it all the way through and I was constantly underlining and reading portions of it to Dennis and saying \u201clisten to what this says.\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI bought several copies and gave one to a couple of my daughters.\u00a0 I gave one to Molly\u2019s mother, Rebecca, and a couple of our other daughters, too.\u00a0 I said you need to have this in your library and if you don\u2019t read it all the way through right now you will read it eventually.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 It is really a love story of sorts that started when you met your wife Linda.\u00a0 How did you meet her, Jerry?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 I was a student at Hope College and she was a student at Hope College in Holland, Michigan.\u00a0 After I experienced a conversion between my sophomore and junior year we became very good friends.\u00a0 Really best friends.\u00a0 One day I was standing in a group of people and somebody got my attention from maybe 100 yards away and I turned and said something to them I\u2019m sure.\u00a0 I was a little cocky back then.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t(laughter)\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLinda was in that circle and I turned back and our eyes met and that was it right there.\u00a0 I just fell in love on the spot.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You were smitten.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 Oh, my goodness was I smitten.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 But you\u2019d known her for months before this?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser<\/strong>:\u00a0 We were very good friends, yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 So what in that moment you don\u2019t know?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 I don\u2019t know but our eyes met and it was just different.\u00a0 So I asked her out a few days later and we were married eight months later.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u00a0No, no, no.\u00a0 I want to know how you asked her to marry you because it has to be a great story.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 Well, we went up to some property that my family owned off the Grand River up in the hills.\u00a0 We made a day of it and did some hiking and I had hidden a family heirloom a little silver container with the engagement ring inside it.\u00a0 That also was the family stone.\u00a0 I asked her to marry me.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You were married for 20 years.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 Twenty years\u2014just shy of 20 years and we had four children.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 She was a homeschooler and she enjoyed teaching your kids.\u00a0 Taking them on field trips, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong><strong>\u00a0 <\/strong>She was a multitalented woman.\u00a0 She was very bright.\u00a0 She was a professional musician and singer.\u00a0 She was the choir director and the director of the professional children\u2019s choir in Spokane and a paid soloist at our home church and also a homeschooler. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You were on a field trip where you went to Idaho and it was not a normal field trip that you would think of when you think of homeschoolers.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser: <\/strong>\u00a0She had just completed a unit on Native American cultures to my two oldest who were being homeschooled at the time.\u00a0 We went on a field trip to a Native American powwow.\u00a0 We had dinner with the tribal leaders and had a wonderful time and wonderful conversation.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIronically one of the topics that came up was the curse of alcoholism in the tribe and the violence that often resulted from it.\u00a0 They spoke with great pain over that.\u00a0 These were really wonderful people.\u00a0 Some fine Christian people.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAfter the dinner with them we went to the powwow and enjoyed it.\u00a0 My two daughters who were then eight and four actually went out and danced with the tribe for a while.\u00a0 I continued my conversation with Linda and several of the tribal leaders until about 8:30 and then we decided to go home.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 Now this was 1991?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 1991 September 27. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u00a0 And you were there with your wife and four children plus your own mom.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0 My mom came for the weekend.\u00a0 She and my wife were going to go dress shopping for a new dress for a solo performance she was going to be doing of the Messiah in December.\u00a0 Typical for my mom she brought 12 quarts of frozen blueberries packed in ice.\u00a0 It was so typical for what she would do.\u00a0 She was a wonderful woman, a great grandma, and a great mom.\u00a0 She was very close to our family.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You had gone to Idaho for this field trip and you decided to head back home to Spokane at that point?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser: <\/strong>\u00a0We did.\u00a0 It was dark out obviously and on a lonely stretch of highway only about 10 minutes from where the powwow was held I noticed a car coming on at a really rapid rate of speed.\u00a0 It slowed down just a little bit at a curve and so I was alert to this.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWithout any warning he just drove right into me.\u00a0 He missed the curve and plowed head on at 85 miles per hour.\u00a0 In fact it was so head on that his car cart wheeled over ours.\u00a0 So it didn\u2019t roll it cart wheeled down the highway.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt was awful.\u00a0 In the wake of that accident as soon as I could I collected myself.\u00a0 I was not injured seriously just bruised and that sort of thing.\u00a0 I looked around and knew that it was really bad.\u00a0 My mother who was sitting way in the back was seriously injured.\u00a0 My four year old I could tell was dead.\u00a0 She had a broken neck.\u00a0 I tried to get a pulse and did mouth to mouth but it was hopeless.\u00a0 I could tell my wife, Linda, was catastrophically injured, too.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy other kids were dazed, crying, and screaming.\u00a0 It was chaotic.\u00a0 All the windows were broken out of the car.\u00a0 My door could open and I got the kids out who were mobile.\u00a0 Katherine was eight and John was six and David was two.\u00a0 I found out later that John had a broken femur and some other injuries but the other two kids were just bruised but okay.\u00a0 I went back to try to tend to Linda.\u00a0 I got a pulse but knew she wasn\u2019t going to live because her injuries were just too severe.\u00a0 I did mouth to mouth on Diana Jane but she was gone.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI got to my mother only briefly but then something beautiful happened.\u00a0 You find these flowers in the midst of ashes almost right away.\u00a0 People began to stop.\u00a0 The scene was chaotic.\u00a0 The driver survived but his wife who was nine months pregnant died and the unborn baby died as well.\u00a0 There were five casualties in the accident.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSome guy got out of the car and went over to my mother and reached out to her through the broken window and held her hand and stroked her arm until she died.\u00a0 That is a beautiful act of grace to me.\u00a0 It was very courageous of him in the midst of that chaos and that violence to break through that with mercy and love.\u00a0 I wish I knew who that man was because I\u2019d like to thank him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 What a surreal moment that had to be for you.\u00a0 Almost like you\u2019ve stepped out of time and space and your body\u2026I don\u2019t know how to describe it other than just surreal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes, it was surreal.\u00a0 I have such vivid memories to this day.\u00a0\u00a0 Nothing has faded at all.\u00a0 First it was a nightmare to have those kinds of memories.\u00a0 It\u2019s not so bad anymore because it\u2019s been integrated into the landscape of my life.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t haunt me like it used to.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe waited a long time before emergency vehicles came and they took over.\u00a0 I got to a phone as soon as I could to call my sister to say something unspeakable had happened.\u00a0 After about an hour the survivors, namely my three children Katherine, John and David and I were all put in the same emergency vehicle and were transported another hour up to Coeur d\u2019Alene for emergency care.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat one hour was probably the most significant hour in my life.\u00a0 It really was the turning point for me.\u00a0 It was like a wormhole from one reality to another.\u00a0 Honestly it\u2019s the most accurate way I can describe it.\u00a0 Time ceased to have meaning.\u00a0 It could have been ten years.\u00a0 That period of time is frozen in my memory and it was probably the most rational moment I\u2019ve ever had in my life. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt was quiet.\u00a0 John was sedated.\u00a0 The other kids were whimpering but it was quiet.\u00a0 The emergency personnel didn\u2019t say anything and I had one hour to just be.\u00a0 I thought about the accident and the scene.\u00a0 I knew what had happened and I thought of what would be as a result.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI considered the task set before me.\u00a0 I had a burden that was placed on my shoulders and in a sense a divine mandate that said you draw a line in the sand right now and decide what you want to be and what you want to come from this experience.\u00a0 And I did.\u00a0 I said, I want the bleeding to stop right here.\u00a0 This is it.\u00a0 I don\u2019t want to do things that are going to set in motion more and more pain and more and more bleeding that could go on for generations.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI made the basic decision right then and there that I was going to somehow by the grace of God respond and live this story out in a way that was going to be redemptive.\u00a0 Redemption was really the key term that just kept coming back to me.\u00a0 Redemption.\u00a0 This is not the final word.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 I want out listeners to hear what\u2019s wrapped up in your statement because you make this statement in your book.\u00a0 You said loss does not have to be the defining moment in our lives instead the defining moment can be our response to that loss.\u00a0 It\u2019s not what happens to us that matters so much as what happens in us.\u00a0 You really believe that don\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser: <\/strong>\u00a0I do believe it by the grace of God.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t write a self help book here.\u00a0 I don\u2019t believe that.\u00a0 The ultimate message of Christianity is not self help it is God\u2019s help.\u00a0 Through a long and often difficult journey I really did discover that the Christian faith is true.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGrace really is available to get us through these hard stretches of life.\u00a0 My response of choosing to trust the grace of God was far more significant than the event itself.\u00a0 You know my kids would say the same thing today.\u00a0 They would say that the accident is actually not that significant.\u00a0 It is what\u2019s come out of it that is significant.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 What seems remarkable to me as you describe this hour of rational clarity is the absence of grief.\u00a0 I think of someone living through what you have just lived through and I would think this person would be a grieving basket case.\u00a0 It\u2019s not that you didn\u2019t experience grief.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 No, I did.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Do you think this was kind of a shock response or was this the grace of God giving you this moment of clarity to prepare you for what was ahead? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 I suppose you could say there was some shock involved in it but Bob, there was something more than that honestly.\u00a0 I look back on it this day with a sense of wonder.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t simply that I had not absorbed the significance.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI knew what had happened to me.\u00a0\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t even as if I was holding it off.\u00a0 I think God gave me that gift.\u00a0 I think He gave me one hour to decide what I was going to believe and where I was going to head and I walked out of that emergency vehicle in Coeur d\u2019Alene into a different world.\u00a0 I collapsed.\u00a0 It was hard going for a long time.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Can I ask the two of you did you experience anything similar to that, Barbara, in going through what you went through with the death of Molly?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong>\u00a0 I think we did but it wasn\u2019t anywhere near as dramatic as what Jerry was describing.\u00a0 We watched our kids and as we watched them respond to the news that Molly was not going to live they had a choice to make in those first moments.\u00a0 I think those early moments of facing tragedy and loss in a crisis like that are the defining moments.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey decided they were going to believe God.\u00a0 They were going to believe that He was good and that He was sufficient and that He knew what He was doing.\u00a0 That really set the course for them from there on out.\u00a0 So I think in the moment of crisis I think God gives us that opportunity to choose.\u00a0 Do we believe Him or not?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I like what Barbara said about defining a course because that\u2019s different from solving all the problems.\u00a0 When you suffer a loss whether it be divorce or terminal illness or loss of a job it can be other things that are a little less dramatic and tragic.\u00a0 I think we do have the power to set a course and that makes a huge difference over a long period of time.\u00a0 It doesn\u2019t solve all the problems but it gets us going in a particular direction.\u00a0 I think I did that by the grace of God.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 You know people or have met people who just dissolved in their moment of pain and didn\u2019t have that rational clarity that you described.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jerry Sittser:<\/strong>\u00a0 I think what happens is we give some kind of tragedy more power than it deserves.\u00a0 It does become the defining moment instead of the response being the defining moment.\u00a0 It\u2019s the thing itself and then pretty soon it\u2019s affecting other relationships.\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s affecting life habits that we form and 20 or 30 years later that divorce or loss or whatever continues to dominate our lives.\u00a0 That\u2019s what I call the second death and it\u2019s actually worse than the initial death.\u00a0 Far worse than the loss of Linda and my mom and Diana Jane would have been say the loss my children would have experienced in my bitterness.\u00a0 In fact I have an interesting story to tell you.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAbout six months or a year after the accident I got an anonymous telephone call from a young woman who said, \u201cMr. Sittser I want to tell you my story.\u00a0 When I was a young girl my mother died of cancer and I\u2019ve been in therapy for six years.\u00a0 I thought to myself this is not a helpful conversation she said no let me continue my story.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cI\u2019m in therapy not because I lost my mother but I lost my father at the same time and he is still alive. He became non functional and so overcome with grief and bitterness that I lost both parents but my dad is still alive.\u00a0 She said, don\u2019t let that happen to you\u201d and she hung up the phone.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow she didn\u2019t give me new information but it was a wonderful reminder to me that the role I was playing was significant.\u00a0 By my own attitude and spirit I was setting a course and I was giving cues to my children.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong>\u00a0 You are also making choices for your own life that are going to determine who you become as a man.\u00a0 I think of the listeners who have eavesdropped today in terms of hearing this story.\u00a0 I wonder what they are facing because all of us experience loss.\u00a0 If you live long enough you will experience loss.\u00a0 The Bible is a very lofty book but it\u2019s also a very gritty book that meets us in the midst of our grief.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou made a statement Jerry that I want to underline.\u00a0 I really understand why a loss can become central to our lives and why the grief that surrounds it can become the defining moment.\u00a0 It hurts.\u00a0 It is terrible.\u00a0 As you describe it it\u2019s catastrophic but I like what you did in your book.\u00a0 You called us away from the focus on the circumstances to focus on the God of all grace and mercy who can bring hope and healing.\u00a0 He can keep us from becoming embittered in that process.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 Barbara, in the weeks that followed in the birth and death of your granddaughter Molly you had a lot of people send you quotes and recommend articles or books.\u00a0 This book was the one God used most powerfully, wasn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Barbara:<\/strong>\u00a0 Yes.\u00a0 It was.\u00a0\u00a0 There were other things, too, but this was the book that I read through that really resonated in my soul.\u00a0 Jerry talked about not just the loss of death but all kinds of loss and how our identity is wrapped up in how we respond to that loss.\u00a0 It was really profound in my life.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong>\u00a0 I think both of you will be encouraged to know that we have a lot of listeners over the last several weeks who have contacted us to get a copy of Jerry\u2019s book called <em>A Grace Disguised<\/em>.\u00a0 We still have copies in our FamilyLife Resource Center.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou can go to our web site FamilyLifeToday.com and find information about Jerry\u2019s book which is called <em>A Grace Disguised:<\/em><em>\u00a0 <\/em><em>How the Soul Grows Through Loss.<\/em>\u00a0 You\u2019ll find it available there along with copies of the book that you\u2019ve just finished writing Barbara along with your daughter Rebecca called <em>A Symphony in the Dark<\/em>:<em> Hearing God\u2019s Voice in Seasons of Grief<\/em>.\u00a0 It focuses in on the events of a year ago when your granddaughter Molly was born and lived for seven days and how your family processed that season of grief.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain both of these books are available from us at <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 Go to our web site FamilyLife Today.com.\u00a0 You can order online from us if you\u2019d like or if it\u2019s easier call 1-800-FL-TODAY.\u00a0 That\u2019s 1-800-358-6329.\u00a0 That\u2019s 1 800 \u201cF\u201das in family \u201cL\u201d as in life and then the word TODAY and we can make arrangements to have whichever of these books you\u2019d like or both of them sent out to you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe also want to take a couple of minutes and say thanks to those of you who help underwrite this daily radio program.\u00a0 Your financial support of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is what keeps this program on the air.\u00a0 It helps defray the costs of production and syndication to keep this program on more than a thousand radio stations and outlets all across the country.\u00a0 It is available online and audio streaming and as a podcast.\u00a0 Thanks to those of you who help make that happen by making donations on a regular basis for the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis month if you\u2019re able to help with a donation of any amount to the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> we have a CD we\u2019d like to send you.\u00a0 This CD features a conversation we had several months ago with Nancy Leigh DeMoss the popular author and speaker and the host of the daily radio program, <em>Revive Our Hearts<\/em>.\u00a0 Our conversation was on the subject of forgiveness and what the Bible says about forgiveness.\u00a0 Nancy has written a great book called <em>Choosing Forgiveness<\/em> and I know that this is a subject that a lot of people struggle with.\u00a0 Jerry you addressed it in your book <em>A Grace Disguised<\/em>.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis CD is our way of saying thank you to you this month when you support the ministry of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> with a donation of any amount.\u00a0 If you\u2019re making that donation online at FamilyLifeToday.com all you have to do is type the word \u201cforgive\u201d in the key code box on the donation form and we\u2019ll know to send a copy of the CD to you. Or call toll-free 1 800 FLTODAY.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMake your donation over the phone and just ask for the CD on forgiveness or the CD with Nancy Leigh DeMoss.\u00a0 Again we are happy to send it to you and we do appreciate your support of this ministry.\u00a0 Thanks for partnering with us.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tTomorrow we\u2019re going to talk about life getting back to normal after a catastrophic event like the one Jerry Sittser experienced almost two decades ago now.\u00a0 We\u2019ll find out if life ever does get back to normal or if it\u2019s just a new normal.\u00a0 I hope you can join us for that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today Keith Lynch and our entire broadcast production team on behalf of our host Dennis Rainey I\u2019m Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelp for today.\u00a0 Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a9 2009 FamilyLife\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you.\u00a0 However, there is a cost to transcribe, create, and produce them for our website.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/site\/c.dnJHKLNnFoG\/b.3782043\/k.384D\/Support_Us.htm\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 FamilyLife.\u00a0 All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/301855","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=301855"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=301855"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=301855"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=301855"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=301855"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=301855"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=301855"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}