{"id":301419,"date":"2007-08-16T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2007-08-16T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/flying-in-a-tight-formation\/"},"modified":"2007-08-16T11:00:00","modified_gmt":"2007-08-16T15:00:00","slug":"flying-in-a-tight-formation","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/flying-in-a-tight-formation\/","title":{"rendered":"Flying in a Tight Formation"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Ben Stuart talks with Dennis Rainey about the spiritual hunger on today&#8217;s college campus.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2007-08-16.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:","filesize":"11.62M","filesize_raw":"12187240","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2814],"tags":[4705],"podcast_series":[7534],"cwp_profile":[9081],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-301419","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-releasing-your-child","tag-college","podcast_series-building-faith-on-the-college","cwp_profile-ben-stuart","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/301419\/flying-in-a-tight-formation","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/301419\/flying-in-a-tight-formation","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"BlXPMkBUan\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/flying-in-a-tight-formation\/\">Flying in a Tight Formation<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/flying-in-a-tight-formation\/embed\/#?secret=BlXPMkBUan\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Flying in a Tight Formation&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"BlXPMkBUan\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg",508,508,false]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"kfairris@familylife.com","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/kfairrisfamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"Ben Stuart talks with Dennis Rainey about the spiritual hunger on today's college campus.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2007-08-16.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0That is one of the premiere issues for college students today is pornography.\u00a0 It's attracting to young single men and women, to some degree, and it is everywhere all the time.\u00a0 It's very difficult to get away from, and the ones that I've seen find victory do it because they get a Christian community as fast as they can \u2013 some people they can get honest with.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0This is FamilyLife Today for Thursday, August 16th.\u00a0 Our host is the president of FamilyLife, Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0\u00a0 There is a lot of life that goes on outside of the classroom on college campuses.\u00a0 We'll talk today about how parents can prepare teenagers to face the challenges and temptations that will come.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0And welcome to FamilyLife Today, thanks for joining us.\u00a0 I think we've made the decision to just home-college the rest of our kids, you know what I mean?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Home college?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0Yeah, you know, you've got homeschooling.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Homeschooling?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0Well, I'm just thinking instead of sending them off to college, we'll home college them \u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0And then what are you going to do with them when they graduate from college? Are you going to home home them?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0That's a fair question.\u00a0 Here's the thing, though.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0You can't always hedge against all the bets, Bob.\u00a0 Parents want to.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0You and I have talked about the book, \"I Am Charlotte Simmons,\" by Tom Wolfe.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0It's now paperback, $15, and I can't bring myself to spend $15 to buy a paperback book, so \u2013 and I'm not sure I need to read it, anyway, but it's apparently a book about life on the college campus, and it's not a pretty picture.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0It really isn't.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0It is a lot of drinking and a lot of sexual behavior, and a lot of stuff that you just don't want to send your sweet, high school senior son or daughter off into.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Well, we're going to have someone help us navigate those challenging collegiate days \u2013 a gentleman who is becoming somewhat of an expert on the college campus.\u00a0 Would you say that, Ben?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0I don't know if I'd say it just yet.\u00a0 I am learning quite a bit.\u00a0 I will say I'm in the learning experience.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Ben Stuart is the director of Breakaway Ministries at the \u2013 well, should I refer to it, Bob, as Texas A&amp;M University or the University at Texas A&amp;M?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0Well, I think those who attend call it the University of Texas.\u00a0 They know there's another one that goes by that name in Austin.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0This is going to bring letters.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0But A&amp;M is THE university now.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0And your daughter went there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0She is a graduate of Texas A&amp;M.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0We're going to reveal our bias.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0I just heard listeners whooping all over the country.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0Oh, yeah.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Yeah, there you go.\u00a0 Well, Ben is the director of Breakaway Ministries.\u00a0 He and his wife, Donna, live there in College Station and give leadership to a little Bible study that you hold there \u2013 is it Reed Auditorium or Reed \u2013 is it \u2013 Arena?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0Reed Arena, that's the name of it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0How many collegians come out to your Bible study there at Reed Arena?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0Well, it varies.\u00a0 When the semester begins in the fall, there will be about 5,000.\u00a0 And then it shakes down to about 3,500 to carry through.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0That's a pretty big Bible study.\u00a0 I mean, you know what I'm saying?\u00a0 There are churches that are going, \"That's your Bible study?\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0Right.\u00a0 It confused me when I first went as a student.\u00a0 People kept inviting me to this Bible study.\u00a0 I was thinking 10 of us on couches, and when I was a student, it was around 1,000, and I was, like \u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0You weren't ready for that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0You and I define Bible study differently apparently.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Is it electric in there?\u00a0 I mean, truthfully, to get 5,000 students out to study the Bible on a college campus.\u00a0 There has to be a great anticipation every Tuesday night when you roll this thing out.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0It's phenomenal, particularly at the beginning of the semester, because so many freshmen come, and they're seeing for the first time you can be a Christian at college.\u00a0 You see all their eyes just bugging out, looking around this basketball stadium, and they're freaking out, and the energy is always high.\u00a0 It's phenomenal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Now, help us out here.\u00a0 Take us into the college culture and help us to kind of see \u2013 help the parents to realize those who are raising young men and women in junior high and high school who are going to soon release their arrows, to send them off to the university.\u00a0 Help them understand what they need to anticipate.\u00a0 What's it look like?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0Right, well, I would say the good news is there's always a remnant.\u00a0 I mean, any campus you go to, there's a group of people who God has brought to Himself, they love Him, and typically they find each other and can move together and get into community and every campus you go to, they may not have thousands grouping together like we have at A&amp;M, but there's always some group that is not just going through the motions religiously.\u00a0 They love the Lord, and they're gathering around to encourage one another in that.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0I've found the students that are most successful in college are the ones who get into that community quickly.\u00a0 The ones who visit a church here and there, kind of sit in the back, or sit in there and don't connect into the community, don't move through that awkwardness of trying to meet some new people, they don't make it.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0And so I've found that the greatest advice parents can give students is \"Get plugged in.\u00a0 Get into community.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0Are you talking about a local church, a campus ministry, either, both?\u00a0 In fact, that's one of the issues for kids on the college campus.\u00a0 Some of them just make the campus ministry.\u00a0 They make Breakaway their church.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0Is that okay during the college years \u2013 to make your Tuesday night Bible study what you do as church?\u00a0 That's your community, that's where you go?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0We strongly encourage them not to.\u00a0 And we do that a number of ways.\u00a0 I'll say it from up front, \"This is not your church.\u00a0 We want you to be involved in church.\"\u00a0 The second Breakaway of the year, every college minister in town comes to Breakaway, and they set up a booth with their information, and we try to plug students into them, and then we have a place in Breakaway every week where students can go and just talk to students about churches.\u00a0 We have a table set up there, information there, and they can learn about the groups they can get involved in.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0But I've found that that's \u2013 when I talk to students who come to me, and they say, \"Man, I want to walk with Christ.\u00a0 My roommate's not a Christian.\u00a0 I've sort of fallen into a community that's not \u2013 I had a kid come up last week, Tuesday, and just say, \"Man, I know I should be living different.\u00a0 The community I made, man, we're at bars every night of the week.\"\u00a0 He's, like, \"I'm out of control, what do I do?\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0I said, \"Are you going to church.\"\u00a0 He said, \"No.\"\u00a0 I said, \"Do you know of any campus ministry?\"\u00a0 He was, like, \"Well, I've heard of Campus Crusade.\"\u00a0 And I said, \"Go to Crusade and sign up for a small group. Just do it.\u00a0 Pull the trigger on it.\u00a0 You're not going to know a soul, that's fine.\u00a0 Nine out of 10 guys in the group might be weirdos, but one of them could be a buddy for life.\"\u00a0 That's what happened to me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0That's right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0And then those guys start shaping me into a man \u2013 getting me into a church and getting me involved and \u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Paint the picture for what it looks like, though, for a young college freshman, a young man entering the campus.\u00a0 He goes to live in a dorm, and he's got a buddy who may not have and is likely not going to have a Christian worldview.\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0In fact, I have to tell a story here \u2013 a friend of mine's son went to the university, and his bed actually faced the computer screen of his roommate, and the computer screensaver that the guy had was pornography.\u00a0 I mean, the young man he was living with was a porn addict.\u00a0 I mean, he was always on it, always looking at it, and this is his roommate, all right?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0What's a young man supposed to do in that situation?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0Home college, that's my suggestion here.\u00a0 Just bring the young man home \u2013 I'm kidding.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0No, but \u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0But you feel like that, at that time, as a parent, don't you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0You really do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0Well, you know, in some situations that extreme, the dorm might have a setup where you can go and talk to someone, file a grievance, or sometimes they'll just bounce you to a different roommate, if you and yours just can't handle it.\u00a0 And so I would say if it's a weaker Christian situation, where you're, like, \"Man, this guy's got it, and I'm going to be looking at it,\" then get out of there.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0But if you're a guy going to college, you are going to run into the prevalence of \u2013 whether it's in your dorm room or in the next-door dorm room \u2013 I mean, it's pretty hard to keep your eyes bounced all the time on the college campus.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0Yes, and it is \u2013 that is one of the premier issues for college students today is pornography.\u00a0 It's just an enormous business, it's attracting to young single men and women, to some degree, and it is pervasive.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0And the college is providing the high-speed Internet access, so it's free of charge, it's right there, it's unfiltered, have at it, right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0Yes, and it's wireless and so everywhere, all the time, it's very difficult to get away from.\u00a0 And the ones that I've seen find victory do it because they get a Christian community as fast as they can \u2013 some people they can get honest with and just say, \"I'm struggling with it in this place.\u00a0 Somebody come around me and talk with me about this.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0At your Bible study?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0We don't do that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Have you talked about this issue in your Bible study at Breakaway?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0It's coming, it's coming.\u00a0 Because I'm mentioning it in my applicational part of my sermons, probably every other talk.\u00a0 But I'm gearing up to give a full talk on pornography, because I just assume it.\u00a0 When I start meeting with guys to do follow-up, we'll talk about who is Jesus, what is Christianity, let's talk about your porn addiction.\u00a0 And I've never had a guy go, \"Man, I just don't know what you're talking about.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0Every single guy I've met with says \u2026\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Isn't that sad?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0It gets me here.\u00a0 Oh, it's incredibly sad, and it's pervasive.\u00a0 I really \u2013 I don't know that I've met a young man who hasn't had contact with it that's just lodged shame into his heart and dealt with him, but the guys I know \u2013 we had students \u2013 I'll give you an example.\u00a0 A guy I would meet with weekly at a coffee shop, I was talking to him about the glory of God and what it means to live for Him, and he just \u2013 I kept sensing this resistance, and he said, \"You know, man, I'm hooked on porn.\"\u00a0 And I said, \"Where does it get you?\"\u00a0 And he said, \"My computer, my bedroom at night, there's no one else there.\"\u00a0 I said, \"Can you get your computer out of your room?\"\u00a0 He said, \"No, my parents bought it for me.\u00a0 They'll ask me about it, and I don't want to have that conversation with Mom.\"\u00a0 It's like, 'It's a porn thing, Mom, no big deal.\"\u00a0 He was, like, \"I'm just not ready to do that.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0And I was, like, \"Man, I don't know what to tell you.\u00a0 We've got to do something.\"\u00a0 So he's trying to put passwords on there, but he can just take them off.\u00a0 So finally one day he just walked into my office with his Internet cable, and just handed it to me and said, \"I'm done with this.\"\u00a0 And I don't want this to own me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0But what made him successful is the very next day his best friend walked into my office, held out an Internet cable and said, \"I heard you're collecting these.\"\u00a0 He put it on the table and walked off.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Cool.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0These are guys who take seriously if your right eye offends you, take your Internet cable and hand it over.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0Yeah, take it out.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0Let me ask you a different question, and I know we're focusing kind of on guys, and I'm sure before the week's done, we're going to talk about the challenges that young ladies face on the college campus.\u00a0 But guys who may say, \"Okay, I'm going to deal with this, I'm going to be accountable, I'm going to hold to this standard.\"\u00a0 The thing they're facing today that I didn't face when I was in college, is girls who are aggressive and who are open \u2013 not only open but inviting casual sexual relationships with boys.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0Home college, you hear what I'm saying here?\u00a0 This theme keeps resonating with me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Do you see any of that, Ben, at A&amp;M?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0You do.\u00a0 I mean, it is a massive cultural push.\u00a0 You see, I was looking at iTunes the other day \u2013 the top 10 downloaded songs, and at least five of them were very sexually intense songs sung by girls that described sexual activity in detail, and you're, like, \"Wow, that's different than what I\" \u2013 we had that kind of stuff in the '80s and '90s but not at this level and, yeah, it's getting pushed into the culture in terms of thinking this is normal and expected.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0So here is my good-lookin' college freshman son, new on campus, being friendly, and I'm wondering, \"What's he going to do when a young lady comes up and say, 'Hey, what are you doing tonight?'\" and he's thinking, \"Well, I'm not doing anything, you know, want to go to Taco Bell\", you know, and it's not Taco Bell she's interested in.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0Yes.\u00a0 You know, I think, more than ever \u2013 well, I don't know whether I should say more than ever, because there's nothing new under the sun, but students today have a wonderful model in their New Testament of what it means to be a Christian.\u00a0 I mean, you can look at Paul and say, okay, he was traveling to Corinth.\u00a0 I mean, what a train wreck of a city in terms of sexual promiscuity and some of the things they were into.\u00a0 Even the things he's telling them they need to stay away from, you're, like, \"Oh, my gosh, these people are sleeping with family members, and this place is broken.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0And in walks Paul but never alone.\u00a0 There's always going to be Timothy right there.\u00a0 There's always going to be Luke or Mark or Barnabas or Silas.\u00a0 \"Man, I'm moving with a crew into this place.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0And so I tell students all the time, when they come and talk to me, I'll say, \"Do you have a church you're plugging into?\"\u00a0 And that's the first question I ask them.\u00a0 Then I say, \"Who's your community, who is your crew?\"\u00a0 And they'll tell me, and they'll say, \"Man, I've got these buddies of mine, and they're into this and that,\" and I say, \"Man, you need to have friends who are just as lost as gooses\" \u2013 or geese \u2013 \"you need friends that are just completely lost, and you're influencing them for the Kingdom, but they can't be your inner core, you know.\"\u00a0 I'll say, \"Get you a core\" \u2013 and I tell them \"That knows you in and out but isn't impressed with you.\u00a0 Get that guy in your world.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0Fly in a tight formation with a few who are kindred spirit with you about pursuing God and making a difference for Jesus Christ.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0Absolutely.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0I'm thinking of a young man at the University of Arkansas who entered the campus much like you described \u2013 kind of looking around, kind of his eyes open, thinking about his options and, for a period of time was on the fence.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0And a young lady, interestingly enough, kind of got in his face, called him off the fence, and today, a year later, this young man is making an impact for Christ.\u00a0 He is leading his buddies to Christ, but he has got some soul partners \u2013 that few that he is flying in tight formation with and, you know what?\u00a0 I had them when I was in college.\u00a0 There was, actually, Barbara, who became my wife, and another guy were my best friends, and you know what?\u00a0 We stormed the campus together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0But there was great strength in that accountability between the three of us as we sought to make a difference for Christ.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0You know, I'll tell you, if I can, two fun stories like that.\u00a0 We had, in one small group situation, I remember two guys in a group with me came up individually and told me, \"Hey, we struggle with depression.\"\u00a0 And I asked both of them, \"Have you ever told anybody about this?\"\u00a0 They said, \"No,\" they're just not in a place where they wanted to share it, they thought their buddies wouldn't understand, they'd make fun of them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0And I said, \"Man, I just don't think you should wrestle with something that difficult in the dark just alone.\"\u00a0 And for some of them it was particularly bad.\u00a0 These two guys, it would be debilitating at times.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0And finally one day, we were in a small group situation, sitting around in a room just talking, and one of them just finally leaned forward and looked around at eight or 10 guys' faces and said, \"I wrestle with depression.\u00a0 Sometimes I can't get out of bed, and I just felt like I needed to say that.\"\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0And then the next guy leans forward and says, \"I do, too,\" and they kind of made eye contact, and when the meeting ended, they prayed together, they ended up becoming roommates together in college, and I loved seeing one of them pull up at church, because he was kind of a quiet guy, inward guy, deep guy, but when he turned that light inward, he could really get himself depressed, but, man, when he had that healthy network and those guys who knew him and care for him, knew his struggles but were walking with it through him, he'd call them when he was struggling. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0I watched him over the next couple of months \u2013 he'd pull up at church, and 10 kids would come falling out of his car because he was in a healthy place spiritually and a place where he could minister from.\u00a0 He had planted his feet in a position of strength and now he was becoming a minister on campus.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0We had another guy, a student who is an evangelist at heart, joined several Christian organizations at A&amp;M, and was just realizing, \"I don't know any non-Christians and that was bothering him.\" So he decided, \"I need to join a fraternity.\u00a0 I'm going to go for it.\"\u00a0 But he didn't do it alone.\u00a0 He grabbed four guys, they went through it together, they didn't preach, really, during rush.\u00a0 They just kind of went through, went through their pledgeship.\u00a0 When they got through their pledgeship, these tight group of guys, people admired what they had, and they stepped forward to their now fraternity brothers and said, \"Hey, we're going to start not one Bible study, we're going to start four.\u00a0 We're each going to start one, and we'd love you guys to come out.\"\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0Over that semester, they saw over 20 of their fraternity brothers come to Christ, and they're having this enormous influence.\u00a0 But the reason they are, like you said, \"storming the castle\" in college, and they're doing it as a crew.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0And to parents right now who are listening who want to home college their kids like Bob's been laughing about.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0I can put together a diploma in Microsoft Publisher that will look just as good as the one they'll get from their campus.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0With a whole lot less danger.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0And it would cost a lot less money, too.\u00a0 I can send it to you for $14.95, that's all the address you need \u2013 Bob Lepine, send your check, $14.95, I'll send the diploma.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0I want to make two points coming out of this.\u00a0 Number one, don't be fooled as a parent to think, \"Okay, we're not going to send them to the secular campus, we're going to send them to Christian colleges and universities,\" and, Ben, you're shaking your head.\u00a0 You know exactly where I'm going, don't you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0Yes, I do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0It's no different, is it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0No, it is not.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0Now, wait, it's no different?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBen:\u00a0I can't speak for every Christian college in the country or anything like that, but I know the experience I've seen of students who go to Christian colleges in the area.\u00a0 Often, what happens in Christian colleges that I've seen in the area, they go to classes where a professor will particularly point out their Christian faith and shoot holes in it \u2013 almost more directly than in the secular experience.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0I know a number of students who have gone to Christian schools because their parents thought this will be a safe place, and have become jaded and disillusioned.\u00a0 Now, not every Christian college is that way, but I certainly wouldn't look and go, \"Well, if the name 'Christian' is in the title, then we're safe.\"\u00a0 It's still going to come down to, \"Is my child in love with the Lord?\u00a0 Is he one of God's kids?\"\u00a0 Because God's going to work with him, and do they have a good community of friends?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis:\u00a0And I'm glad that's where you went, because the point is not to put Christian colleges down, because they're trying to do a good job of providing a Christian atmosphere, to teach about Christ in a Christian worldview.\u00a0 The point is, you want your child, when they graduate, whether they go to the secular university, the Christian university, or where they go to work or to service, you want them to come out at the end of that period of time, that season of their life, with an infectious love for Christ.\u00a0 And that, to me, is the most important point that parents need to be focused on, because they're never going to remove all the dangers.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0We're going to always be parents, our hearts are always going to be for protecting our character but, you know what?\u00a0 As they grow up, they have to make their own choices, they have to be able to press into the culture, they have to be able to take the message of Jesus Christ and the Scripture that they understand and know and apply it to the choices they make.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob:\u00a0And I think we've got to make sure, as parents, that we have done what we can do to help equip them to make those choices, to make sure that we have pointed them in the right direction, but we can't make the choices for them, and I think that's your point.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0You know, I'm thinking about books that I've had my children read as they've been in their teen years.\u00a0 I've actually paid them to read some of these books because I want to make sure that they're thinking rightly about things like relationships and about issues like pornography and what they're going to be facing when they are making their own decisions on the college campus.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0And, Ben, on our website at FamilyLife.com, we've collected a group of what we refer to as \"purity resources\" for teenagers and young adults.\u00a0 Books like Josh Harris's book, \"Sex is not the Issue, Lust Is,\" or Fred Stoker's book, \"Every Man's Battle,\" that helps guys understand the issue of pornography and how you get a game plan together so that it doesn't become snare for you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0I want to encourage our listeners, go to our website, FamilyLife.com.\u00a0 When you get to the home page, there's a red button on the home page that says \"Go.\"\u00a0 It's kind of in the center of the screen.\u00a0 If you click that button, it will take you to the area of the site where you can find out more about a variety of resources that we have available to help you, as parents, equip your sons and daughters for the choices they will have to make as they head off to college.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0Again, the website is FamilyLife.com, click the red \"Go\" button in the middle of the screen, or call us at 1-800-FLTODAY, that's 1-800-358-6329 \u2013 1-800-F-as-in-family, L-as-in-life, and then the word TODAY, and someone on our team can let you know about these resources that are available, and let you know how you can have them sent to you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0When you get in touch with us, if you are able to help us this month with a donation of any amount for the ministry of FamilyLife Today, we would love to hear from you.\u00a0 This is the end of our fiscal year, and so it's an important time for us to hear from as many listeners as possible.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0In fact, our fiscal year will be ending in the next two weeks, so we're hoping to hear from as many folks as we can during that time and, in fact, one of the things that has been encouraging people to make a donation this month has been our Challenge Fund.\u00a0 We've been hearing from listeners all around the country challenging friends, neighbors, relatives, co-workers, folks who share a hobby or a common interest. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0People have been issuing challenges to encourage others to join with them in helping to support the ministry of FamilyLife Today.\u00a0 In fact, we had a challenge issued from a landscape professional who wanted other landscape designers and professionals to consider making a donation.\u00a0 We heard from a nurse who want other nurses to consider making a donation to FamilyLife Today, and a young lady from Cantonsville, Maryland, wanted to challenge other Girl Scout leaders to join with her in helping to support the ministry of FamilyLife Today.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0And there have been a lot of other challenges that have been issued here during the month of August.\u00a0 Let me encourage you, if you can help with a donation this month, we'd love for you to go online or to call 1-800-FLTODAY to make your donation.\u00a0 And we also want to encourage you to issue a challenge of your own, to encourage other FamilyLife Today listeners to help support the ministry.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0You can make your donation online at FamilyLife.com, or you can call 1-800-FLTODAY and in either place you'll be able to issue a challenge as well, and let me just say in advance, we appreciate hearing from you, and we appreciate your financial support.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0Well, tomorrow we're going to continue to talk about life on the college campus with Ben Stuart.\u00a0 We're going to talk particularly about issues facing young women as they head off to college.\u00a0 I hope you can be with us for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0I want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.\u00a0 On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.\u00a0 We'll see you back tomorrow for another edition of FamilyLife Today. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u00a0FamilyLife Today is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas, a ministry of Campus Crusade for Christ. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t_______________________________________________________________\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts for you. However, there is a cost to transcribe, create, and produce them for our website. If you've benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright \u00a9 FamilyLife. 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