{"id":300419,"date":"2018-10-17T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2018-10-17T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/growing-into-a-woman-of-character\/"},"modified":"2024-10-07T22:41:35","modified_gmt":"2024-10-08T02:41:35","slug":"growing-into-a-woman-of-character","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/growing-into-a-woman-of-character\/","title":{"rendered":"Growing Into a Woman of Character"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Jaquelle Crowe and her father, Sean Crowe, talk about connecting as a family. Jacquelle talks about how her parents were quick to confess when they made mistakes.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-10-17.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:24:55","filesize":"22.81M","filesize_raw":"23915373","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2833,2836,2806,2855],"tags":[4350,4587,4586,4581,2209,2520,4582],"podcast_series":[7256],"cwp_profile":[8857],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-300419","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-godly-legacy","category-raising-girls","category-spiritual-development","category-teens","tag-character","tag-confessing-youre-sorry","tag-connecting-as-a-family","tag-modelling-the-gospel","tag-parenting","tag-parenting-teens","tag-teaching-your-kids-about-christ","podcast_series-this-changes-everything","cwp_profile-jaquelle-crowe-ferris","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/300419\/growing-into-a-woman-of-character","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/300419\/growing-into-a-woman-of-character","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"pLw9AvT7BR\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/growing-into-a-woman-of-character\/\">Growing Into a Woman of Character<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/growing-into-a-woman-of-character\/embed\/#?secret=pLw9AvT7BR\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Growing Into a Woman of Character&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"pLw9AvT7BR\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-10-17.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-10-17.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Many parents will tell you that navigating their children through the teen years can be a lot trickier than raising them when they are young. Sean Crowe says there\u2019s a reason for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean:<\/strong> In the earlier years, it\u2019s so easy; because you are focusing a lot on obedience. Of course, we can\u2019t understand grace unless we understand law. So when they are younger, you focus a lot on the law; but when they get older, and when their relationship becomes their own relationship with the Lord, then you\u2019ve got to make sure they understand grace. That\u2019s a challenge.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Wednesday, October 17<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey; I'm Bob Lepine. We\u2019ll talk with Sean Crowe and his daughter Jaquelle about the challenges they faced when Jaquelle was going through her teen years. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. Have you ever heard of <em>Lizzie Bright and the Buckminster Boy<\/em>? Have you ever heard of that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Not recently.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I\u2019m looking at this list of books: \u201cEleven Books I Love\u201d from Jaquelle Crowe\u2014it\u2019s in her book, <em>This Changes Everything<\/em>\u2014I know a lot or these books; I mean: <em>Valley of Vision, The Chronicles of Narnia, Holiness of God<\/em>\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Right; right\u2014I got all of those.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And then I get to <em>Lizzie Bright and the Buckminster Boy<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Let\u2019s find out what it is!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Jaquelle, what is that book about?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle:<\/strong> Oh, you guys have to read that book. It\u2019s actually a book that was written for young adults. It is a book about this pastor\u2019s kid that goes to this very small community in Maine. He meets this girl, Lizzy Bright. They start this friendship that is kind of forbidden; because at this time, there was a lot of racism going on. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLizzy Bright was a black girl, and the pastor\u2019s kid was a white boy.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Ohhh!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle:<\/strong> A lot of\u2014a lot of biblical truths, I think, are communicated in this book. It\u2019s a good one!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>When did you read this?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle:<\/strong> Ooh, maybe when I was 15\/16?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>The name of the book was\u2014again? There are going to be people who\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong><em>Lizzy Bright and the Buckminster Boy<\/em>, by Gary Schmidt. Fifteen\/sixteen\u2014can an average fifteen-year-old read this?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle:<\/strong> Oh, yes, yes, yes! It was written for young adults.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Oh, okay; it\u2019s YA fiction.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle:<\/strong> Yes, sir. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I\u2019m using the cool term.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle:<\/strong> You\u2019ve got the lingo down. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>YA; that\u2019s right!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>So we have Jaquelle here in the studio, along with her dad, Sean.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes! Sean, you came in earlier to be a part of this dialogue. We thought, \u201cWe\u2019ll just have you stay around.\u201d It\u2019s nice to have you joining us as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It\u2019s not just having you stay around\u2014[Laughter]\u2014you are eyewitness to a lot of what we are talking about\u2014and we want to talk about this dating relationship thing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean:<\/strong> Really? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes, I think\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean:<\/strong> That\u2019s where you\u2014that\u2019s where you want to start?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>No, no! We\u2019re not going to start with that; we\u2019ll get to it!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean:<\/strong> Oh, you\u2019re just going to hold that over me now.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>No; no! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Sean is a Pastor in Halifax. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf people live in Halifax, and listening to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>\u2014they\u2019re invited to church this Sunday; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Absolutely!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What\u2019s the name of the church?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Gospel Light Baptist Church in Halifax, Nova Scotia.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And that would be L-I-G-H-T? I just wanted to make sure!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes. Really, you have to do that too? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You didn\u2019t name the church; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>No; no!!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And you wouldn\u2019t have picked Gospel Lite?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>No! I wouldn\u2019t have! [Laughter] See, you need to understand, in Halifax, Nova Scotia, there\u2019s lots of lighthouses. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Ahhhh!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>So there is Lighthouse Baptist Church, and there\u2019s Gospel Light Baptist Church\u2014it\u2019s all about the lighthouse.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>How about changing it to Gospel Bright Light? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>There you go! There you go! I mean, we are called to be a light for the gospel; you know.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Jaquelle has written a book called <em>This Changes Everything: How the Gospel Transforms the Teen Years<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEarlier, we talked about how teens today need coaching, training, encouragement and discipleship in their relationships. That begins, obviously, with their relationship with God and who they are in Christ. Secondly, it moves to their relationship with their parents; and third, it also moves to their siblings. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd you shared about how you and your brother are as different as night and day, but you guys have a lot of fun together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Yes; it\u2019s true! A part of why we have this great relationship is because we\u2019re different. But I do think siblings that are alike can also have a great relationship.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I\u2019m just sitting here, as we\u2019ve been unpacking all of this\u2014the themes that we\u2019ve been talking about: identity and relationships\u2014those are two of the four core themes that you and Barbara address in your book, <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em>. That the two that we haven\u2019t dived into are the theme of mission\u2014and how to train a child to live on mission\u2014and then character.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSean, what have you and your wife done, as parents, to try to help Jaquelle be a young woman of character?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes; well, I mean, for the most part, what we have done is\u2014we\u2019ve tried to live that out for both of our kids. We want them to see what a person of character looks like. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs you said, I\u2019m a pastor. What we often talk about: \u201cWhen it comes to being a pastor, it\u2019s all about character. When you look at 1Timothy 3, Paul addresses the character of the leader.\u201d What we\u2019ve tried to do is\u2014we\u2019ve tried to be an example to our kids of godly character. But also, and probably more importantly, is to teach them from the Word of God what true godly character looks like.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And Jaquelle, how would say they\u2019ve impacted your character, just looking back over the past now 21 years?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Well, I think, one big thing\u2014and it\u2019s a big part of being a godly pastor\u2014is the issue of integrity. That\u2019s a big area that I see in both of my parent\u2019s lives. I also see faithfulness in the small things. My dad pastors a pretty small church and has been involved in a lot of just ordinary discipleship that nobody sees\/nobody knows about and faithfully plodding away at obedience. And then just purity is another area that my parents have modeled well and talked to me well about. There are a lot of other areas, but those are just a few.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Here\u2019s the thing about trying to raise kids of character. It can be easy for us, as parents, to want to mold behavior through behavior modification rather than trying to raise kids, who from the heart, have the character of God built into them. Lots of times, as parents, we just want the behavior\u2014we just want our kids acting right\u2014and whatever makes that happen, we\u2019re fine with that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes; there\u2019s no question\u2014it\u2019s much easier to focus on the obedience than on the grace. I think, especially for Jaquelle\u2019s mom and I, one of the most difficult parts of parenting has been in the later years. In the earlier years, it\u2019s so easy; because you are focusing a lot on the obedience. Of course, you can\u2019t understand grace unless we understand law. So when they are younger, you focus a lot on the law; but when they get older\u2014as you talked with her before: \u201cWhen their relationship becomes their own relationship with the Lord, then you\u2019ve got to make sure that they understand grace,\u201d\u2014and that\u2019s a challenge!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>One of the things that you and Diana did was\u2014you explained who God was too. And that really is at the heart of the character issue. Once you know who God is, you can become like Him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes; absolutely. If you don\u2019t understand who God is, then how can you understand the gospel? Then you do just end up in moralistic therapeutic deism.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Jaquelle, do you remember recognizing the difference between just doing the right behavior and having it come out of your heart\u2014because this is what you wanted to do\u2014and not just because you wanted to please your parents?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>I do. I was around a pre-teen when I really, kind of noticed this switch or made this switch for myself\u2014that I realized that obedience to God wasn\u2019t something that I did so that I could be saved\u2014but that\u2019s what being a Christian was all about \/ but that obedience was something I did <em>because<\/em> I was saved. Because I loved God so much, I wanted to read His Word; I wanted to pray. That should flow out of the heart\u2014just so in love with Jesus and so compelled by the beauty of the gospel\u2014that I should want to do that for myself.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>If you look at the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness\u2014all of these virtues\u2014we can probably fake that for a season\u2014you know, a couple of days; maybe, if you\u2019re really good, you could go two or three weeks. But when it\u2019s coming from inside of you, not just something you\u2019re trying to fake\u2014and I don\u2019t mean fake in the sense that you\u2019re being a phony\u2014this is\u2014you\u2019re just trying to act it out rather than it coming from inside of you. That\u2019s not going to work for a young person or for a grown-up; is it? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>No; absolutely not. I think young people, especially\u2014we are attracted to authenticity. We want people to be real, and we want to experience something real. That\u2019s why I think we have some of these teenagers, who buy\u2014or say they are buying into a faith that is not real, and then they get out of the home, and they are like: \u201cOh! This wasn\u2019t my faith, so we\u2019re not\u2014we\u2019re done with this.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s the teenagers who actually encounter who God is for themselves\u2014that are saved by this authentic faith\u2014that spend the rest of their lives just sold out for this message.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>A good bit of how character, I think, is formed is\u2014as parents live out their lives in front of their kids\u2014and as Barbara and I have had to do with our kids: get down on one knee, when they were little, and look, eye to eye, with them and confess how we just made a mistake and name it. The kids had seen it\u2014had seen what had happened\u2014and to ask them to forgive us for getting angry, for being short, for not being the kind of parent we needed to be. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDo you recall a time\u2014that you can tell, here, on the broadcast\u2014when your dad, pastor of the church\u2014who is a great man; I\u2019ve already heard a lot; I\u2019m impressed, personally\u2014but every great man\u2014we\u2019ve all failed. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHow has he passed on character to you by sharing his failures and letting you in on the interior of his life and where he struggles?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Oh, Iknow that I can answer this; because this is something that we\u2019ve talked about a lot\u2014that they were not perfect and that they were willing to ask for forgiveness. I can think of a couple of different occasions. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, give us one. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>I can think of something from <em>two<\/em> <em>days<\/em> ago.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Okay; what?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>The other morning, when I got up.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Oh, yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes! She remembers right away!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Okay; so he got a message on his phone that just\u2014it was not a great message. He woke up; he looked at it\u2014it was the first thing\u2014and it immediately set him off. He came downstairs. My mom and I were down there. He just was clearly very frustrated and just spoke harshly about this thing. We were like: \u201cWhoa! You need to go back to bed!\u201d He was completely off; he did not speak kindly to us. We were just like, \u201cOkay.\u201d Then, what?\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014half-an-hour later? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>\u2014not even.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Yes; he was like: \u201cYou know what? I was not kind; that was not right. I ask both of you for forgiveness for how I responded to this frustrating message and how I spoke to you.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Sean, we had a guest on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, who said something that was one of those moments, where I went, \u201cThat\u2019s profound!\u201d and it just stuck with me. He said, \u201cMost Christian parents today are teaching their children how to be sin avoiders and sin concealers instead of teaching them how to be sin confessors and sin repenters.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe said we\u2019re raising kids who\u2014the message is: \u201cStay away from that; and if you do it and I find out about it, you\u2019re going to be in big trouble,\u201d rather than: \u201cLook\u2014I\u2019m going to fail; you\u2019re going to fail. When we do, here\u2019s how we get right with each other and right with God\u2026\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis is something I think moms and dads need to grab onto this and go, \u201cWe need to change the atmosphere around here in our home.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes; I remember a point in my life, where this became so real to me and it changed everything from that point on. It was a time when Jaquelle\u2019s brother, Travis, indicated that he thought that his mom and I didn\u2019t sin. It was a very young age. For me, that just blew me away; because I didn\u2019t sin in the same way that he sinned. I mean, I think, at that point, he was\u2014I don\u2019t know\u20145\/6\/7\/8?\u2014something like that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFrom that point on, it became very clear to me that I had to make sure my kids knew that I sinned, and that I confessed of sin, and I repented of sin. Because we see that from parents \/ we see that from pastors\u2014that we think we have to put on this aura that we are perfect \/ that we have it all together; and we don\u2019t. We need to be authentic.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I felt that when I was raising my kids\u2014I felt: \u201cMy job is to model godliness for my kids\u201d; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: \u201c<\/strong>I need to let them always see me being godly and never see me being ungodly, or they\u2019ll somehow go, \u2018Oh, okay; he\u2019s not as godly as he says he is,\u2019 and they\u2019ll abandon the whole thing.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut a part of godliness is confessing your sin; right? \u201cIf we say we have no sin we lie, but if we confess our sins He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from unrighteousness.\u201d Our kids need to learn that; we need to model that for them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Kids can sniff out hypocrisy very quickly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You think?!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>I think so.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I think you\u2019re right. Barbara and I wanted to make sure our kids, not only knew how to live the Christian life, but also how to handle their failures; because we knew, in their lifetimes, they were going to have to face their failures a whole lot of times because we faced a bunch ourselves. I think kids need to see and be coached by parents\u2014not to go sin on purpose so he can model how to do it\u2014but when you do find you have done it, you own it!\u2014you say: \u201cYou know what? That wasn\u2019t appropriate. I <em>did<\/em> sin against you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cI want you to remember your dad as someone who tried to model a Christ-like life; but at the points when he didn\u2019t, he owned it, and he confessed it, and he asked for forgiveness; and he waited for people to process long enough to grant their forgiveness\u201d; because sometimes the wound we can cause, as parents, can be deep.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Jaquelle, Psalm 127 says that children are like arrows. You are familiar with this verse\u2014you\u2019ve heard this before; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Yes; I am.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>The assignment moms and dads have is to craft that arrow so it will fly toward the right target at the time you release the arrow, which can be a painful release. Sean, just get ready for the pain that will come\u2014when that moment\u2014because it sounds like that might be sneaking up on you; okay? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy question is: \u201cHow have your parents helped you develop a missional mindset, so that you go: \u2018You know what really matters?\u2014what life is really all about is advancing the Kingdom.\u2019\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Well, I think the biggest thing is\u2014again, I have seen them willing to do that. I alluded before that we made some very big moves\u2014from western Canada to Texas \/ from Texas to eastern Canada\u2014because my parents were absolutely compelled by obedience. And they were like: \u201cYou know what? As much as we loved being near family \/ as much as we love our friends here, we believe that Jesus is better. Our lives are not about us; ultimately, our lives are about doing what God has called us to do,\u201d\u2014so that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe other thing is just challenging us. I think we have pretty low expectations for a lot of our kids and teens these days. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I <em>really<\/em> agree with you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Okay! Good!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I don\u2019t think we are challenging our kids to nearly a high enough standard or to a great enough mission.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>How old were you when you read <em>Do Hard Things<\/em>?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>I believe I was 11!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Wow! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay; right! It was instilled into you early that: \u201cLook; you can do more than your peers can do,\u201d and \u201cLife is about more than just your happiness.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Absolutely. Just this idea that young people <em>need<\/em> to have this rebellious stage \/ that young people <em>need<\/em> to sow their wild oats\u2014it\u2019s just not true. If we call young people to a higher standard, they will rise to it. We undersell our young people. They can do so, so much more than we expect. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>On the nose! [Laughter] What do you think about that, dad?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>I think, unfortunately, sometimes we treat our young people like second-class citizens. You know, it is as though we have big-people church and then we\u2019ve got youth group. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>We\u2019ve got to babysit them; yes, right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>We\u2019ve got activities and youth group. For her mom and I\u2014and for us, as a church\u2014we\u2019ve just never had that philosophy. We believe that: \u201cIf you\u2019re in the Kingdom, you\u2019re in the Kingdom,\u201d and \u201cIf you\u2019re in the Kingdom, you have a mission. That mission is to go and make disciples and to make the glory of God known to this world.\u201d Why would we want to undersell that? I mean, that is the <em>greatest<\/em> mission you could ever be involved in.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I mentioned earlier that Barbara and I just finished our work on a book called <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em> that goes with the video series by the same name. We talk about\u2014a whole section of the book\u2014about mission. I just, yesterday, read the section on \u201cReleasing Your Child.\u201d I read it and I go: \u201cMan, this is stout! This is <em>really<\/em> hard.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd this is the truth\u2014I almost backed down and started going: \u201cI need to find a way to soften this a bit, because I am <em>really<\/em> challenging parents to take this seriously; and as they pull their arrow back, go for the bulls-eye. Raise them to follow Christ, and do the hard thing and represent Him in the next generation.\u201d I didn\u2019t\u2014I didn\u2019t change a word\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014but it is tough stuff. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think parents today need to realize\u2014one of the reasons why we\u2019re seeing young people rebel is because we haven\u2019t given them a high enough mission. They\u2019re not preoccupied with some noble calling. They\u2019ve settled for the lure of lesser loyalties\u2014there are plenty of those around in the world today. So call your kids to follow Christ. Do what Sean did with his son and daughter and raising them to hit the bulls-eye.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes; although you\u2019re a long way from releasing your son\u2014at least, longer away than the release with Jaquelleis going to be\u2014now, you\u2019ve told her that release means she\u2019s got to live within 50 miles from mom and dad; right? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>No; we haven\u2019t told her that. I think, when you use terminology of \u201crelease,\u201d I think the important thing to realize here is neither her nor her brother ever belonged to me in the first place. I\u2019m merely a steward; right? Her mom and I have to remind ourselves of that every day\u2014that they don\u2019t ultimately belong to us; they belong to God. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur desire\u2014I mean, we have to fight against our own desires\/our selfish desires\u2014what we want. It is terrifying to consider the fact they are going to go, but we just pray that we have prepared them for that so God can use them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Sean, there is nothing quite like walking down the aisle with your first-born daughter. I did it!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes; there\u2019s lots of time for that! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And placing her hand in the hand of a man and going, \u201cI must be smaller; he must be greater.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Oh, here we go. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes;I think I\u2019ll be ready for that in, at least, a decade. [Laughter] At least, a decade or two, I\u2019ll be ready.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Good to know!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Jaquelle, if you were sitting with a 15-year-old today\u2014and you could emphasize one over-arching message with that 15 year old\u2014who is going: \u201cI go to youth group. I love Jesus. I want to follow Him. I\u2019m in this.\u201d But you look and you say, \u201cI don\u2019t know that you\u2019re really fully in this.\u201d What would you say to him?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>I would just say that: \u201cJesus has no half-hearted followers, so your faith <em>has<\/em> to make everything in your life different. And what that means is that you will find true joy. You can be preoccupied with all these lesser loyalties\u2014you know, there are a lot of things competing for your worship right now\u2014but there is only one thing that will give you the satisfaction and joy that you are looking for to sell your entire life out for the sake of Jesus.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It sounds like a parable from Matthew 13 about a pearl\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>\u2014of great price.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014of great price, where you leave everything to buy the pearl.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>That\u2019s right, because you know that the pearl is the thing of ultimate value.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And that\u2019s where we started earlier, with Jaquelle, on the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes\u2014back at the beginning.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: \u201c<\/strong>Treasure Christ: He is the great value.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank you for writing the book, and I want to thank you for coming all the way from Nova Scotia!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014and bringing your dad.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Oh! That\u2019s right!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Thanks for bringing your dad too!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And way to model how a dad protects his daughter!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Well, thank you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>No; that\u2019s a great statement you\u2019re making. May God\u2019s favor be upon you as you continue to birth that church and do something spectacular for a country, a province, and a city that need Christ just like a lot, here, in America do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Amen.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And the next time any of our listeners are in Halifax, I hope they\u2019ll attend Gospel Light Baptist Church\u2014or whatever the new name is. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>I don\u2019t think they\u2019ll be a name change any time soon. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We\u2019ve got copies of Jaquelle\u2019s book. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I haven\u2019t even thought that, Bob.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> The book is called <em>This Changes Everything.<\/em> You can go, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com to get a copy; or you can call us at 1-800-FL-TODAY. Again, our website is FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to order Jaquelle Crowe\u2019s book, <em>This Changes Everything<\/em>. The number to call is 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, I think most of the moms and dads, who\u2019ve been with us, listening to this conversation today, would agree that what we have been talking about is core\u2014this is what really matters. I mean, you go out 20 years from now\/30 years from now and ask, \u201cWhat\u2019s most important?\u201d You\u2019ll look back and say, \u201cThe time I invested \/ the work I invested in helping to mold and shape my children\u2019s lives, that\u2019s what I\u2019m proudest of \/ that\u2019s what I\u2019m most grateful for.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, we are all about providing you with the kind of practical biblical help and hope you need for your marriage and as you raise your family. We want to help raise godly marriages and families, because we believe godly marriages and families can change the world. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThose of you who partner with us\u2014who invest in this ministry\u2014you\u2019re the ones making this program possible for hundreds of thousands of people who are tuning in every day. We just want to say, \u201cThank you for your partnership.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, if you can help with a donation right now, we\u2019d love to send you our 2019 FamilyLife calendar. It\u2019s all about togetherness as a family. In fact, the calendar is filled with ideas each month\u2014things you can do together, as a family, to build togetherness; and there\u2019s a Scripture you can memorize together each month. The calendar is our gift to you when you donate, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to donate: 1-800-358-6329\u20141-800-FL-TODAY. Or you can mail your donation, along with your request for the calendar, to<em> FamilyLife Today<\/em>, PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; and our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we are going to talk about the challenge facing young women in this culture today\u2014single women\u2014 when it comes to the issue of sex. Juli Slattery is going to be with us to talk about that, along with our own Michelle Hill, who is a single woman. We\u2019ll have that conversation, and I hope you will tune in as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> Ministry.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2018 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:24:55"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["22.81M"],"filesize_raw":["23915373"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-300419.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-300419.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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Crowe and her father, Sean Crowe, talk about connecting as a family. Jacquelle talks about how her parents were quick to confess when they made mistakes.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-10-17.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Many parents will tell you that navigating their children through the teen years can be a lot trickier than raising them when they are young. Sean Crowe says there\u2019s a reason for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean:<\/strong> In the earlier years, it\u2019s so easy; because you are focusing a lot on obedience. Of course, we can\u2019t understand grace unless we understand law. So when they are younger, you focus a lot on the law; but when they get older, and when their relationship becomes their own relationship with the Lord, then you\u2019ve got to make sure they understand grace. That\u2019s a challenge.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Wednesday, October 17<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey; I'm Bob Lepine. We\u2019ll talk with Sean Crowe and his daughter Jaquelle about the challenges they faced when Jaquelle was going through her teen years. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. Have you ever heard of <em>Lizzie Bright and the Buckminster Boy<\/em>? Have you ever heard of that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Not recently.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I\u2019m looking at this list of books: \u201cEleven Books I Love\u201d from Jaquelle Crowe\u2014it\u2019s in her book, <em>This Changes Everything<\/em>\u2014I know a lot or these books; I mean: <em>Valley of Vision, The Chronicles of Narnia, Holiness of God<\/em>\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Right; right\u2014I got all of those.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And then I get to <em>Lizzie Bright and the Buckminster Boy<\/em>.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Let\u2019s find out what it is!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Jaquelle, what is that book about?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle:<\/strong> Oh, you guys have to read that book. It\u2019s actually a book that was written for young adults. It is a book about this pastor\u2019s kid that goes to this very small community in Maine. He meets this girl, Lizzy Bright. They start this friendship that is kind of forbidden; because at this time, there was a lot of racism going on. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLizzy Bright was a black girl, and the pastor\u2019s kid was a white boy.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Ohhh!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle:<\/strong> A lot of\u2014a lot of biblical truths, I think, are communicated in this book. It\u2019s a good one!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>When did you read this?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle:<\/strong> Ooh, maybe when I was 15\/16?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>The name of the book was\u2014again? There are going to be people who\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong><em>Lizzy Bright and the Buckminster Boy<\/em>, by Gary Schmidt. Fifteen\/sixteen\u2014can an average fifteen-year-old read this?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle:<\/strong> Oh, yes, yes, yes! It was written for young adults.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Oh, okay; it\u2019s YA fiction.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle:<\/strong> Yes, sir. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I\u2019m using the cool term.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle:<\/strong> You\u2019ve got the lingo down. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>YA; that\u2019s right!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>So we have Jaquelle here in the studio, along with her dad, Sean.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes! Sean, you came in earlier to be a part of this dialogue. We thought, \u201cWe\u2019ll just have you stay around.\u201d It\u2019s nice to have you joining us as well.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>It\u2019s not just having you stay around\u2014[Laughter]\u2014you are eyewitness to a lot of what we are talking about\u2014and we want to talk about this dating relationship thing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean:<\/strong> Really? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes, I think\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean:<\/strong> That\u2019s where you\u2014that\u2019s where you want to start?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>No, no! We\u2019re not going to start with that; we\u2019ll get to it!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean:<\/strong> Oh, you\u2019re just going to hold that over me now.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>No; no! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Sean is a Pastor in Halifax. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf people live in Halifax, and listening to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>\u2014they\u2019re invited to church this Sunday; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Absolutely!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>What\u2019s the name of the church?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Gospel Light Baptist Church in Halifax, Nova Scotia.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And that would be L-I-G-H-T? I just wanted to make sure!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes. Really, you have to do that too? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>You didn\u2019t name the church; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>No; no!!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And you wouldn\u2019t have picked Gospel Lite?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>No! I wouldn\u2019t have! [Laughter] See, you need to understand, in Halifax, Nova Scotia, there\u2019s lots of lighthouses. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Ahhhh!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>So there is Lighthouse Baptist Church, and there\u2019s Gospel Light Baptist Church\u2014it\u2019s all about the lighthouse.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>How about changing it to Gospel Bright Light? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>There you go! There you go! I mean, we are called to be a light for the gospel; you know.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Jaquelle has written a book called <em>This Changes Everything: How the Gospel Transforms the Teen Years<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tEarlier, we talked about how teens today need coaching, training, encouragement and discipleship in their relationships. That begins, obviously, with their relationship with God and who they are in Christ. Secondly, it moves to their relationship with their parents; and third, it also moves to their siblings. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd you shared about how you and your brother are as different as night and day, but you guys have a lot of fun together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Yes; it\u2019s true! A part of why we have this great relationship is because we\u2019re different. But I do think siblings that are alike can also have a great relationship.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I\u2019m just sitting here, as we\u2019ve been unpacking all of this\u2014the themes that we\u2019ve been talking about: identity and relationships\u2014those are two of the four core themes that you and Barbara address in your book, <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em>. That the two that we haven\u2019t dived into are the theme of mission\u2014and how to train a child to live on mission\u2014and then character.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSean, what have you and your wife done, as parents, to try to help Jaquelle be a young woman of character?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes; well, I mean, for the most part, what we have done is\u2014we\u2019ve tried to live that out for both of our kids. We want them to see what a person of character looks like. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs you said, I\u2019m a pastor. What we often talk about: \u201cWhen it comes to being a pastor, it\u2019s all about character. When you look at 1Timothy 3, Paul addresses the character of the leader.\u201d What we\u2019ve tried to do is\u2014we\u2019ve tried to be an example to our kids of godly character. But also, and probably more importantly, is to teach them from the Word of God what true godly character looks like.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And Jaquelle, how would say they\u2019ve impacted your character, just looking back over the past now 21 years?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Well, I think, one big thing\u2014and it\u2019s a big part of being a godly pastor\u2014is the issue of integrity. That\u2019s a big area that I see in both of my parent\u2019s lives. I also see faithfulness in the small things. My dad pastors a pretty small church and has been involved in a lot of just ordinary discipleship that nobody sees\/nobody knows about and faithfully plodding away at obedience. And then just purity is another area that my parents have modeled well and talked to me well about. There are a lot of other areas, but those are just a few.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Here\u2019s the thing about trying to raise kids of character. It can be easy for us, as parents, to want to mold behavior through behavior modification rather than trying to raise kids, who from the heart, have the character of God built into them. Lots of times, as parents, we just want the behavior\u2014we just want our kids acting right\u2014and whatever makes that happen, we\u2019re fine with that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes; there\u2019s no question\u2014it\u2019s much easier to focus on the obedience than on the grace. I think, especially for Jaquelle\u2019s mom and I, one of the most difficult parts of parenting has been in the later years. In the earlier years, it\u2019s so easy; because you are focusing a lot on the obedience. Of course, you can\u2019t understand grace unless we understand law. So when they are younger, you focus a lot on the law; but when they get older\u2014as you talked with her before: \u201cWhen their relationship becomes their own relationship with the Lord, then you\u2019ve got to make sure that they understand grace,\u201d\u2014and that\u2019s a challenge!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>One of the things that you and Diana did was\u2014you explained who God was too. And that really is at the heart of the character issue. Once you know who God is, you can become like Him.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes; absolutely. If you don\u2019t understand who God is, then how can you understand the gospel? Then you do just end up in moralistic therapeutic deism.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Jaquelle, do you remember recognizing the difference between just doing the right behavior and having it come out of your heart\u2014because this is what you wanted to do\u2014and not just because you wanted to please your parents?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>I do. I was around a pre-teen when I really, kind of noticed this switch or made this switch for myself\u2014that I realized that obedience to God wasn\u2019t something that I did so that I could be saved\u2014but that\u2019s what being a Christian was all about \/ but that obedience was something I did <em>because<\/em> I was saved. Because I loved God so much, I wanted to read His Word; I wanted to pray. That should flow out of the heart\u2014just so in love with Jesus and so compelled by the beauty of the gospel\u2014that I should want to do that for myself.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>If you look at the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness\u2014all of these virtues\u2014we can probably fake that for a season\u2014you know, a couple of days; maybe, if you\u2019re really good, you could go two or three weeks. But when it\u2019s coming from inside of you, not just something you\u2019re trying to fake\u2014and I don\u2019t mean fake in the sense that you\u2019re being a phony\u2014this is\u2014you\u2019re just trying to act it out rather than it coming from inside of you. That\u2019s not going to work for a young person or for a grown-up; is it? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>No; absolutely not. I think young people, especially\u2014we are attracted to authenticity. We want people to be real, and we want to experience something real. That\u2019s why I think we have some of these teenagers, who buy\u2014or say they are buying into a faith that is not real, and then they get out of the home, and they are like: \u201cOh! This wasn\u2019t my faith, so we\u2019re not\u2014we\u2019re done with this.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt\u2019s the teenagers who actually encounter who God is for themselves\u2014that are saved by this authentic faith\u2014that spend the rest of their lives just sold out for this message.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>A good bit of how character, I think, is formed is\u2014as parents live out their lives in front of their kids\u2014and as Barbara and I have had to do with our kids: get down on one knee, when they were little, and look, eye to eye, with them and confess how we just made a mistake and name it. The kids had seen it\u2014had seen what had happened\u2014and to ask them to forgive us for getting angry, for being short, for not being the kind of parent we needed to be. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDo you recall a time\u2014that you can tell, here, on the broadcast\u2014when your dad, pastor of the church\u2014who is a great man; I\u2019ve already heard a lot; I\u2019m impressed, personally\u2014but every great man\u2014we\u2019ve all failed. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHow has he passed on character to you by sharing his failures and letting you in on the interior of his life and where he struggles?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Oh, Iknow that I can answer this; because this is something that we\u2019ve talked about a lot\u2014that they were not perfect and that they were willing to ask for forgiveness. I can think of a couple of different occasions. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>So, give us one. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>I can think of something from <em>two<\/em> <em>days<\/em> ago.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Okay; what?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>The other morning, when I got up.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Oh, yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes! She remembers right away!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Okay; so he got a message on his phone that just\u2014it was not a great message. He woke up; he looked at it\u2014it was the first thing\u2014and it immediately set him off. He came downstairs. My mom and I were down there. He just was clearly very frustrated and just spoke harshly about this thing. We were like: \u201cWhoa! You need to go back to bed!\u201d He was completely off; he did not speak kindly to us. We were just like, \u201cOkay.\u201d Then, what?\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014half-an-hour later? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>\u2014not even.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Yes; he was like: \u201cYou know what? I was not kind; that was not right. I ask both of you for forgiveness for how I responded to this frustrating message and how I spoke to you.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Sean, we had a guest on <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, who said something that was one of those moments, where I went, \u201cThat\u2019s profound!\u201d and it just stuck with me. He said, \u201cMost Christian parents today are teaching their children how to be sin avoiders and sin concealers instead of teaching them how to be sin confessors and sin repenters.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe said we\u2019re raising kids who\u2014the message is: \u201cStay away from that; and if you do it and I find out about it, you\u2019re going to be in big trouble,\u201d rather than: \u201cLook\u2014I\u2019m going to fail; you\u2019re going to fail. When we do, here\u2019s how we get right with each other and right with God\u2026\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis is something I think moms and dads need to grab onto this and go, \u201cWe need to change the atmosphere around here in our home.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes; I remember a point in my life, where this became so real to me and it changed everything from that point on. It was a time when Jaquelle\u2019s brother, Travis, indicated that he thought that his mom and I didn\u2019t sin. It was a very young age. For me, that just blew me away; because I didn\u2019t sin in the same way that he sinned. I mean, I think, at that point, he was\u2014I don\u2019t know\u20145\/6\/7\/8?\u2014something like that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFrom that point on, it became very clear to me that I had to make sure my kids knew that I sinned, and that I confessed of sin, and I repented of sin. Because we see that from parents \/ we see that from pastors\u2014that we think we have to put on this aura that we are perfect \/ that we have it all together; and we don\u2019t. We need to be authentic.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>I felt that when I was raising my kids\u2014I felt: \u201cMy job is to model godliness for my kids\u201d; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: \u201c<\/strong>I need to let them always see me being godly and never see me being ungodly, or they\u2019ll somehow go, \u2018Oh, okay; he\u2019s not as godly as he says he is,\u2019 and they\u2019ll abandon the whole thing.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut a part of godliness is confessing your sin; right? \u201cIf we say we have no sin we lie, but if we confess our sins He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from unrighteousness.\u201d Our kids need to learn that; we need to model that for them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Kids can sniff out hypocrisy very quickly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You think?!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>I think so.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I think you\u2019re right. Barbara and I wanted to make sure our kids, not only knew how to live the Christian life, but also how to handle their failures; because we knew, in their lifetimes, they were going to have to face their failures a whole lot of times because we faced a bunch ourselves. I think kids need to see and be coached by parents\u2014not to go sin on purpose so he can model how to do it\u2014but when you do find you have done it, you own it!\u2014you say: \u201cYou know what? That wasn\u2019t appropriate. I <em>did<\/em> sin against you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cI want you to remember your dad as someone who tried to model a Christ-like life; but at the points when he didn\u2019t, he owned it, and he confessed it, and he asked for forgiveness; and he waited for people to process long enough to grant their forgiveness\u201d; because sometimes the wound we can cause, as parents, can be deep.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Jaquelle, Psalm 127 says that children are like arrows. You are familiar with this verse\u2014you\u2019ve heard this before; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Yes; I am.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>The assignment moms and dads have is to craft that arrow so it will fly toward the right target at the time you release the arrow, which can be a painful release. Sean, just get ready for the pain that will come\u2014when that moment\u2014because it sounds like that might be sneaking up on you; okay? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tMy question is: \u201cHow have your parents helped you develop a missional mindset, so that you go: \u2018You know what really matters?\u2014what life is really all about is advancing the Kingdom.\u2019\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Well, I think the biggest thing is\u2014again, I have seen them willing to do that. I alluded before that we made some very big moves\u2014from western Canada to Texas \/ from Texas to eastern Canada\u2014because my parents were absolutely compelled by obedience. And they were like: \u201cYou know what? As much as we loved being near family \/ as much as we love our friends here, we believe that Jesus is better. Our lives are not about us; ultimately, our lives are about doing what God has called us to do,\u201d\u2014so that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe other thing is just challenging us. I think we have pretty low expectations for a lot of our kids and teens these days. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I <em>really<\/em> agree with you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Okay! Good!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I don\u2019t think we are challenging our kids to nearly a high enough standard or to a great enough mission.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>How old were you when you read <em>Do Hard Things<\/em>?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>I believe I was 11!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Wow! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Okay; right! It was instilled into you early that: \u201cLook; you can do more than your peers can do,\u201d and \u201cLife is about more than just your happiness.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Absolutely. Just this idea that young people <em>need<\/em> to have this rebellious stage \/ that young people <em>need<\/em> to sow their wild oats\u2014it\u2019s just not true. If we call young people to a higher standard, they will rise to it. We undersell our young people. They can do so, so much more than we expect. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>On the nose! [Laughter] What do you think about that, dad?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>I think, unfortunately, sometimes we treat our young people like second-class citizens. You know, it is as though we have big-people church and then we\u2019ve got youth group. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>We\u2019ve got to babysit them; yes, right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>We\u2019ve got activities and youth group. For her mom and I\u2014and for us, as a church\u2014we\u2019ve just never had that philosophy. We believe that: \u201cIf you\u2019re in the Kingdom, you\u2019re in the Kingdom,\u201d and \u201cIf you\u2019re in the Kingdom, you have a mission. That mission is to go and make disciples and to make the glory of God known to this world.\u201d Why would we want to undersell that? I mean, that is the <em>greatest<\/em> mission you could ever be involved in.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I mentioned earlier that Barbara and I just finished our work on a book called <em>The Art of Parenting<\/em> that goes with the video series by the same name. We talk about\u2014a whole section of the book\u2014about mission. I just, yesterday, read the section on \u201cReleasing Your Child.\u201d I read it and I go: \u201cMan, this is stout! This is <em>really<\/em> hard.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd this is the truth\u2014I almost backed down and started going: \u201cI need to find a way to soften this a bit, because I am <em>really<\/em> challenging parents to take this seriously; and as they pull their arrow back, go for the bulls-eye. Raise them to follow Christ, and do the hard thing and represent Him in the next generation.\u201d I didn\u2019t\u2014I didn\u2019t change a word\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014but it is tough stuff. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think parents today need to realize\u2014one of the reasons why we\u2019re seeing young people rebel is because we haven\u2019t given them a high enough mission. They\u2019re not preoccupied with some noble calling. They\u2019ve settled for the lure of lesser loyalties\u2014there are plenty of those around in the world today. So call your kids to follow Christ. Do what Sean did with his son and daughter and raising them to hit the bulls-eye.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes; although you\u2019re a long way from releasing your son\u2014at least, longer away than the release with Jaquelleis going to be\u2014now, you\u2019ve told her that release means she\u2019s got to live within 50 miles from mom and dad; right? [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>No; we haven\u2019t told her that. I think, when you use terminology of \u201crelease,\u201d I think the important thing to realize here is neither her nor her brother ever belonged to me in the first place. I\u2019m merely a steward; right? Her mom and I have to remind ourselves of that every day\u2014that they don\u2019t ultimately belong to us; they belong to God. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOur desire\u2014I mean, we have to fight against our own desires\/our selfish desires\u2014what we want. It is terrifying to consider the fact they are going to go, but we just pray that we have prepared them for that so God can use them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Sean, there is nothing quite like walking down the aisle with your first-born daughter. I did it!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes; there\u2019s lots of time for that! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And placing her hand in the hand of a man and going, \u201cI must be smaller; he must be greater.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Oh, here we go. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Yes;I think I\u2019ll be ready for that in, at least, a decade. [Laughter] At least, a decade or two, I\u2019ll be ready.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Good to know!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Jaquelle, if you were sitting with a 15-year-old today\u2014and you could emphasize one over-arching message with that 15 year old\u2014who is going: \u201cI go to youth group. I love Jesus. I want to follow Him. I\u2019m in this.\u201d But you look and you say, \u201cI don\u2019t know that you\u2019re really fully in this.\u201d What would you say to him?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>I would just say that: \u201cJesus has no half-hearted followers, so your faith <em>has<\/em> to make everything in your life different. And what that means is that you will find true joy. You can be preoccupied with all these lesser loyalties\u2014you know, there are a lot of things competing for your worship right now\u2014but there is only one thing that will give you the satisfaction and joy that you are looking for to sell your entire life out for the sake of Jesus.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>It sounds like a parable from Matthew 13 about a pearl\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>\u2014of great price.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014of great price, where you leave everything to buy the pearl.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>That\u2019s right, because you know that the pearl is the thing of ultimate value.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And that\u2019s where we started earlier, with Jaquelle, on the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes\u2014back at the beginning.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: \u201c<\/strong>Treasure Christ: He is the great value.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank you for writing the book, and I want to thank you for coming all the way from Nova Scotia!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>\u2014and bringing your dad.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Jaquelle: <\/strong>Oh! That\u2019s right!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Thanks for bringing your dad too!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>And way to model how a dad protects his daughter!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Well, thank you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>No; that\u2019s a great statement you\u2019re making. May God\u2019s favor be upon you as you continue to birth that church and do something spectacular for a country, a province, and a city that need Christ just like a lot, here, in America do.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>Amen.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>And the next time any of our listeners are in Halifax, I hope they\u2019ll attend Gospel Light Baptist Church\u2014or whatever the new name is. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Sean: <\/strong>I don\u2019t think they\u2019ll be a name change any time soon. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We\u2019ve got copies of Jaquelle\u2019s book. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I haven\u2019t even thought that, Bob.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> The book is called <em>This Changes Everything.<\/em> You can go, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com to get a copy; or you can call us at 1-800-FL-TODAY. Again, our website is FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to order Jaquelle Crowe\u2019s book, <em>This Changes Everything<\/em>. The number to call is 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, I think most of the moms and dads, who\u2019ve been with us, listening to this conversation today, would agree that what we have been talking about is core\u2014this is what really matters. I mean, you go out 20 years from now\/30 years from now and ask, \u201cWhat\u2019s most important?\u201d You\u2019ll look back and say, \u201cThe time I invested \/ the work I invested in helping to mold and shape my children\u2019s lives, that\u2019s what I\u2019m proudest of \/ that\u2019s what I\u2019m most grateful for.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup>, we are all about providing you with the kind of practical biblical help and hope you need for your marriage and as you raise your family. We want to help raise godly marriages and families, because we believe godly marriages and families can change the world. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThose of you who partner with us\u2014who invest in this ministry\u2014you\u2019re the ones making this program possible for hundreds of thousands of people who are tuning in every day. We just want to say, \u201cThank you for your partnership.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, if you can help with a donation right now, we\u2019d love to send you our 2019 FamilyLife calendar. It\u2019s all about togetherness as a family. In fact, the calendar is filled with ideas each month\u2014things you can do together, as a family, to build togetherness; and there\u2019s a Scripture you can memorize together each month. The calendar is our gift to you when you donate, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to donate: 1-800-358-6329\u20141-800-FL-TODAY. Or you can mail your donation, along with your request for the calendar, to<em> FamilyLife Today<\/em>, PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; and our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we are going to talk about the challenge facing young women in this culture today\u2014single women\u2014 when it comes to the issue of sex. Juli Slattery is going to be with us to talk about that, along with our own Michelle Hill, who is a single woman. We\u2019ll have that conversation, and I hope you will tune in as well. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> Ministry.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2018 FamilyLife. 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