{"id":300411,"date":"2018-10-11T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2018-10-11T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/everyone-is-fighting-a-battle\/"},"modified":"2024-10-07T22:41:35","modified_gmt":"2024-10-08T02:41:35","slug":"everyone-is-fighting-a-battle","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/everyone-is-fighting-a-battle\/","title":{"rendered":"Everyone Is Fighting a Battle"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Lee Wolfe Blum remembers her youth and the powerful, damaging message, &#8220;you don&#8217;t matter.&#8221; Blum encourages women to be authentic in the midst of struggles.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-10-11.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:26:29","filesize":"24.25M","filesize_raw":"25430070","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2822,2821,2093],"tags":[4576,4579,2638,4580,4577,4578],"podcast_series":[7255],"cwp_profile":[8856],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-300411","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-growing-in-your-faith","category-reaching-out","category-women","tag-bulimia","tag-defined-by-god","tag-eating-disorder","tag-encouragement","tag-negative-thinking","tag-self-worth","podcast_series-brave-is-the-new-beautiful","cwp_profile-lee-wolfe-blum","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/300411\/everyone-is-fighting-a-battle","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/300411\/everyone-is-fighting-a-battle","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"OHhJM9RFhp\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/everyone-is-fighting-a-battle\/\">Everyone Is Fighting a Battle<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/everyone-is-fighting-a-battle\/embed\/#?secret=OHhJM9RFhp\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Everyone Is Fighting a Battle&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"OHhJM9RFhp\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-10-11.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-10-11.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Is there anyone in your life\u2014in your circle of influence\u2014who\u2019s struggling with something right now? Lee Wolfe Blum says, \u201cOf course, there is!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> None of us have to look far to find them\u2014they\u2019re your next-door neighbor; they\u2019re sitting in your church; they\u2019re in your grocery store. The reality is that <em>everyone<\/em> is fighting a battle you don\u2019t know about\u2014<em>everyone!<\/em> And to think that we walk around, and we look at each other, and we get jealous of each other, when the reality is\u2014we need to <em>stop<\/em> and say: \u201cHey, what\u2019s going on with you? Tell me about your life.\u201d Just stop and listen, and be a friend.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Thursday, October 11<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. We\u2019re going to talk today about how we can help bring courage to people in our lives who are struggling to be brave. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. You know, I was just looking at the back of this book we\u2019re going to be talking about, and I saw that our guest loves to help women find hope and healing from perfectionism and addictions.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Wow!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And I thought, \u201cWe\u2019ve probably got some listeners who could use a little help with both of those.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And it also talks about how to be brave.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And how brave is the new beautiful. In fact, that\u2019s the name of her book. Lee Wolfe Blum joins us on <em>FamilyLife Today. <\/em>Lee, welcome to the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Thank you so much for having me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Lee is from Minnesota.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; Edina, where I was born! Give me a fist bump on that. [Laughter] We are both cake-eaters; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Cake-eaters.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Hold on. You\u2019ve now mentioned that three times before we came on the air, and now you\u2019ve mentioned it again. It went past me the other three times. I kept wanting to stop you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I think it\u2019s\u2014isn\u2019t it a reference to \u201cLet them eat cake?\u201d It\u2019s kind of where the upper-crust\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014you know, in Edina, you\u2019re of royal blood\u2014that\u2019s basically what it is.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> And they say Edina is: \u201cEvery Day I Need Attention.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Oh! I didn\u2019t know that! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Oh! [Laughter] I like that!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I\u2019m so sad you told that to Dennis!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> I wasn\u2019t born there, though. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> This explains <em>everything<\/em>! I want our listeners to write in about this and just tell me\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Please!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u201cIs it a part of Bob\u2019s DNA or not?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Edina: Every Day I Need Attention. [Laughter] Okay; now, I need counseling. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, we\u2019ve got one right here in the studio\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I know!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014because Lee is a mental health practitioner. I think Bob\u2019s in deeper trouble, though, than you can possible help! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe\u2019s a speaker and author, and married to Chris since 1996\u2014and has three\u2014count them\u2014three teenaged boys.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> There\u2019s nothing quite as challenging as that; is there?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> No! Thank God we have a girl dog. [Laughter] They are a challenge.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You got invited to speak at your church, and this was something that you were excited about. I mean, you had always kind of <em>hoped<\/em> that you would get an opportunity to speak; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Oh, you\u2019re picking that story\u2014okay; yes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And you got the invitation. You were excited; and as you got to thinking about it, it became less exciting?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, she was in the audience, listening to somebody else speak; wasn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes; actually, the story is: I was born the third child in a family that made us five. I grew up with this message that: \u201cTables weren\u2019t made for five,\u201d and \u201cRoller coasters aren\u2019t made for five.\u201d So a message, very early on in my life, was, \u201cYou don\u2019t matter.\u201d Then the other piece was: \u201cI was the accident.\u201d It was this message, constantly through my life, of: \u201cYou don\u2019t matter,\u201d and \u201cYou\u2019re an accident.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI spent a great deal of my early childhood and young adulthood trying to figure out how to make myself matter. I did become a Christian in high school through Young Life\u2014thank God\u2014because I grew up in a non-Christian home.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> That only enhanced my perfectionism of: \u201cI\u2019m just going to make myself perfect!\u201d Making myself perfect and making myself matter\u2014it led me into a life-threatening eating disorder. When I was in my early 20s, I had an eating disorder; and while I was in the hospital, many, many people said to me, \u201cYou will always have an eating disorder.\u201d And I thought, \u201cIsn\u2019t that interesting?\u201d And the other thing\u2014and we can also talk about this later\u2014they also said, \u201cIf you would just pray, you would be healed.\u201d There was really this dissonance of: \u201cHow do I make sense of this?\u201d and there was no other person I had met that had recovered from an eating disorder. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, if we fast-forward, I did actually move into recovery in my early 20s. About ten years into recovery, I decided\u2014crazy!\u2014I don\u2019t know why I decided this: \u201cI\u2019m going to write a book!\u201d Now, nobody had ever said to me that I was a good writer. Nobody had ever said I should write a book, but I just really felt like I wanted to write a book. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI wanted to write a story that shows both, because God heals us\u2014He does! You can recover, but nobody had shown me that when I was sick. I wanted to write that story. The book came out\u2014my first book, <em>Table in the Darkness: A Memoir<\/em>. My church asked me to come and speak.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI thought I had arrived; right? I am thinking\u2014and here it is\u2014that same kind of message that I had grown up with: \u201cI have to prove I matter. I have to prove my worth.\u201d I thought: \u201cI have arrived! This is it!\u201d\u2014right?\u2014\u201cThese people are going to come up to me and talk to me, and they\u2019re going to give me kudos.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis other author came as well. She was a very, very popular author. She got up to speak, and I got up to speak; and, after, they said, \u201cBoth of the authors are going to be at the table for a book-signing.\u201d I put on my lipstick\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Oh, I know where this is going! Dennis has had this happen to him too.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00 <\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe has!\u2014haven\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I\u2019ve got a story you\u2019ve got to hear. This story will really encourage <em>you<\/em>, but go ahead\u2014finish yours. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Okay; so I put on my lipstick\u2014you know, because I always put on my lipstick\u2014and I stood there and just waited for all of these people\u2014right?\u2014to come and tell me how great my book was, and how much it helped them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes, I understand; I understand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Not a single person came up to me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Nobody?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> None! They all walked to <em>her<\/em>. I mean, I could <em>feel<\/em> the wind as they were passing me by. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Sorry.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> But it was such\u2014as hard as it was, it was such a valuable lesson for me: \u201cThis is <em>not <\/em>who I am. I don\u2019t matter because people say I matter. I matter because God calls me \u2018the beloved.\u2019\u201d That, then, is also part of what propelled me to write the second book, <em>Brave Is the New Beautiful<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> So, do you want to hear about the time Dennis and Max Lucado spoke together?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Oh! Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Do we need to say more?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I gave this message, and it was <em>really <\/em>a good message on honoring your parents. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s really the craving of the culture right now; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Nobody wants to hear that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And there was a book-signing afterwards. I sat down at the table, like you. It wasn\u2019t that no one came by.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Did you put your lipstick on?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I had\u2014no; no lipstick! [Laughter] I had a family of five who came\u2014one family; okay? So I signed a book for them; but meanwhile, I could see the line\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014the line that formed that started at Max\u2019s table, went downstairs\u2014two floors\u2014and out into the parking lot. Here\u2019s my conclusion: \u201cI was not that bad, and Max was not that good!\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> \u201cSomewhere in the middle!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Here\u2019s the real story: Max Lucado has sold 100 million books.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right; right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> So it\u2019s not a good comparison to get into\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014what you went through or what I went did. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You\u2019ve sold somewhat less than that yourself.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Somewhat less than 100 million. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut here\u2019s your point\u2014your point is\u2014you can\u2019t get your measurements of who you are from the world. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You\u2019ve got to go to the Book\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Exactly!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014find out who God is\u2014and measure against who He is and what He\u2019s called you to do; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Exactly; but in the moment, it hurts so badly!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> I went home and cried for a good, long time. It hurt! And it was such a <em>good<\/em>\u2014like it was God saying: \u201cYou know what? You\u2019ve got to knock this off! You\u2019ve been doing this your whole, entire life, Lee! You keep doing it; it\u2019s not going to work for you!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It was a great lesson for me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> What I ended up doing was getting at the end of Max\u2019s line. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You got one of those books autographed!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; but you know, what you\u2019re saying is really good here. I appreciate your authenticity. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere are lessons to be learned, even when things don\u2019t turn out the way you hoped.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right; right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And think about wives and moms today. Think about young girls, who are growing up today\u2014and this is not exclusively an issue that women face\u2014but maybe, disproportionately, women are being introspective and wondering, \u201cWhat does define me?\u201d Maybe men are getting it from the workplace\u2014I don\u2019t know\u2014but I meet a lot of women, who seem troubled by their sense of worth or value\u2014wondering if they have any\u2014because of what the culture is telling them or not telling them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014especially around beauty\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Exactly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014and just to remind folks: \u201cBrave is the new beautiful<em>.<\/em>\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You\u2019re calling women, as well as men, to a character quality.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s what you\u2019re saying is beautiful.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> And it\u2019s not because I just wrote this sentence down and thought that this would be a good idea. It\u2019s because I saw it with my own eyes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAfter I wrote the first book, I thought: \u201cOkay; that was it. It was a one-time deal.\u201d But then, after the book came out, I\u2014especially living in Edina\u2014I was terrified of what these <em>other<\/em> women would think of me. I remember being at my kids\u2019 school carnival, and walking around the hallways, looking at these women who looked perfect\u2014like they looked like they had everything together! Even though, in my head, I know that\u2019s not true, it <em>looked<\/em> to be so. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI thought: \u201cWhen they read my book about my eating disorder, and about my depression, and about my cutting, and all these awful things about <em>me<\/em> and what I did, they are going to run from me! They are going to cancel playdates. They are going to whisper about me.\u201d I even asked my husband: \u201cCan we just move? Can we change our name?\u201d\u2014you know, like, \u201cWhat am I doing?! Why am I doing this?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd what I found was the exact opposite to be true. These women came out of the woodworks. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey came out, and they said\u2014and this first book was published in 2013. They came to me and they said: \u201cThank you! Thank you!\u201d And then, they said: \u201cMe too,\u201d \u201cThank you,\u201d\u2014maybe not\u2014\u201cMe too; I have an eating disorder,\u201d or maybe not \u201cMe too; I struggled with depression,\u201d but \u201cMe too; my marriage is struggling,\u201d or \u201cMe too; I have anxiety,\u201d or \u201cMe too; I feel like I can\u2019t talk at a party.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI started kind of wondering, like: \u201cWhy does everyone look like they have it together? \u2014and yet, behind the scenes\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> \u2014because I work at a hospital, with patients who struggle with eating disorders and addictions. I <em>know<\/em> what\u2019s behind the scenes here. <em>Why <\/em>are we not talking about this?! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen I read the quote by C.S. Lewis\u2014and for some reason, it was the first time I had ever read it\u2014and it\u2019s: \u201cWhen one person says to another: \u2018You too? I thought I was the only one!\u2019 <em>that<\/em> is when true friendship begins.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis book, actually, was supposed to be called <em>Me Too<\/em>\u2014I had pitched it as <em>Me Too. <\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee: <\/strong>That was why I wanted it to be about \u201cMe too,\u201d because I wanted to explore: \u201cWhy are we doing this, as women?! Why are we doing this to each other?\u201d I feel alone; you feel alone. The suicide rate in the United States for women has risen to an all-time high in the last 30 years, and a lot of it is women. \u201cWhat is happening to us, as women?\u201d\u2014I wanted to explore that, so I pitched it to a publisher. They liked the idea; they changed the title.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI interviewed hundreds of women. I\u2019ll tell you what! I did not have to look far to find these women. None of us have to look far to find them\u2014they\u2019re your next-door neighbor; they\u2019re sitting in your church; they\u2019re in your grocery store. The reality is that <em>everyone<\/em> is fighting a battle you don\u2019t know about\u2014<em>everyone!<\/em> And to think that we walk around, and we look at each other, and we get jealous of each other, when the reality is\u2014we need to stop and say: \u201cHey, what\u2019s going on with you? Tell me about your life,\u201d\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014just stop and listen, and be a friend.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Lee, you titled your book, <em>Brave Is the New Beautiful<\/em>. Define that word, and then explain to women how they find bravery.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> So one of the things that I found through interviewing these women was asking that question: \u201cTell me your story,\u201d\u2014just: \u201cTell me your story.\u201d In it\u2014as they would, and I was so honored! Honestly, there\u2019s nothing more honorable than having someone sit with you and share their deepest hurts and their deepest pains\u2014like, \u201cTell me your story.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd then, as they would tell me their story: \u201cYou are so brave!\u201d\u2014right?\u2014like: \u201cThat is so brave!\u201d\u2014you know, women who have been in abusive marriages; or another woman in the book who went through adoption and had to return the kids\u2014I mean, <em>really <\/em>difficult stuff! Another woman\u2014you know, plenty of stories of women who have lost children: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cHow do you keep on going? How do you love God through that?\u201d Women who have been in cults, and yet still love Jesus with all of their heart\u2014how does that happen?\u2014that is brave! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut then I would ask these women, \u201cDo you think you\u2019re brave?\u201d Do you know what every single one of them said?\u2014\u201cNo.\u201d Not a single one said, \u201cI think I\u2019m brave,\u201d which, then, is another piece of all this. Not only do we sit and look at each other\u2014we get jealous of each other, and we do all this comparing\u2014but then, when we are doing amazing things and really stepping out in bravery and courage, we don\u2019t even think we\u2019re brave. We demure, and we just kind of shrink back. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThrough all of this, I also, you know\u2014hearing these women\u2019s stories\u2014also helped me to be [braver]. So that\u2019s really how you are brave\u2014is when you are brave, and another woman sees you being brave, that helps <em>her<\/em> be brave. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut if we just hide behind our doors, and pretend like we have it all together, <em>nothing\u2019s<\/em> going to change.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> It\u2019s almost like bravery is: \u201cLook, I\u2019m not perfect. I\u2019ll admit that. I\u2019ve got flaws just like everybody else, by the way.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u201cBut I\u2019m not going to try to hide them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u201cAnd I have experienced grace, so I can be honest about my flaws.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you can\u2019t, you need to learn how to do that; because that\u2019s where bravery is\u2014it\u2019s standing up in a world that values perfection\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014that airbrushes everything \/ that gives us an unreal picture of what humanity is\u2014to stand up and say: \u201cYou know what? I\u2019m flawed at a deep level. I\u2019ve had failures. I have things I\u2019m ashamed of that are a part of my past. I\u2019ve learned how to find grace for those things, and I can live in that today.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s a brave person; isn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> It is, but I think it gets a little tricky in the Christian culture sometimes\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> \u2014because we\u2019re supposed to be kind; and we\u2019re supposed to be nice, and all of these things. We sometimes get so much over here to: \u201cI\u2019m looking like I\u2019m a good Christian.\u201d Then we put on this mask, and we don\u2019t want to talk about the tough stuff.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> And actually, I learn a lot from my patients that I work with. I think I\u2019ll always do the work that I do, because I learn <em>so much <\/em>from people who are in the trenches of really struggling. One patient said this to me one day, and I love it\u2014is that: \u201cEveryone wants to be perfect, but nobody wants to be around perfect.\u201d That is so true! When I go to my girlfriend\u2019s house, whose house is all tidy\/put together\u2014decorated beautifully\u2014I feel uncomfortable. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> I have this other girlfriend\u2014that she\u2014when we go to her house, it\u2019s kind of messy\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014I feel so much more comfortable. I\u2019m not saying: \u201cOkay; everybody! Let\u2019s go and be messy!\u201d But what I am saying is\u2014I\u2019d much rather be around somebody who\u2019s real and authentic than somebody who is trying <em>so hard <\/em>to look like they have it all together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You talk about two women\u2014in your book, you tell the story of two patients: Shannon and Jenny\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014who are both dealing with eating disorders; right?\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014but dealing with them very differently.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes; yes. One of the patients that you\u2019re referring to is somebody who was bitten by a dog. Her primary focus in life\u2014she was a flute player. Because she had been bitten by this dog, her face was then permanently scarred right around her lips. She lost her identity in a couple of things\u2014in how she looked and in her flute playing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe masked that by doing what she could control, which is a lot of eating disorders, of, you know\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014\u201cIf I could just <em>look <\/em>this certain way\u2026\u201d \u201cIf I could just <em>be<\/em> this certain size\u2026\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, bravery is not about how skinny you can be, or how pretty you can be\u2014it\u2019s just not! You know, I\u2019d rather be with a person who is just living life, and being authentic about it, than somebody who is\u2014like I mentioned before\u2014being perfect and trying to have it all.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod does not call us to that. I think we get it so confused, sometimes, as women. You know, He does not call us to be perfect. I think when we start doing that, we are acting like God. There is only one God!\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> \u2014and it\u2019s not me! The minute I start thinking it\u2019s me is when I\u2019m messed up! The minute I\u2019m like: \u201cYou know what? Thank God I have a Savior, because I am a hot mess!\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> \u2014that is a good place to be! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And sometimes I think, in the midst of our messes, when we\u2019re asked the question if we\u2019re brave\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014the answer is, \u201cI\u2019ve never really done anything that was brave.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> The reason we answer it that way is because we really don\u2019t know the definition of what bravery is.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I want to come back to that and say, \u201cHow would you define bravery?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Well, first, you open your Bible\u2014so I\u2019m going to give you two definitions. One that I love\/love in Psalm 27:14, which is very interesting; because it says: \u201cWait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.\u201d How do you do that?! How are you \u201cbrave and courageous\u201d and \u201cwait patiently?\u201d\u2014[Laughter]\u2014those are two different things!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> So a part of bravery\u2014and I am so guilty of this! I\u2019m like a wild bull that, you know, comes out of the gate, ready to go. If I feel like God\u2019s telling me to do something, I just go and do it!\u2014right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> That doesn\u2019t always work very well. In fact, it often gets me into a lot of trouble! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut I think that\u2019s an interesting verse, because sometimes the bravest thing we can do\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLee: \u2014is wait.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob: Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis: \u2014is be still\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLee: Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis: \u2014and not say anything.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob: Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLee: So what is brave for me is different than what is brave for you. And for somebody else, it might be: \u201cWait patiently for the Lord\u201d; and that is your bravery. For other people, it might be: \u201cGo and be brave and courageous,\u201d\u2014meaning: \u201cStep out and do something,\u201d\u2014and that is their bravery.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo what I have found bravery is\u2014is that it\u2019s different for everyone. For some people, bravery is just getting out of bed in the morning.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob: Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLee: For other people, it\u2019s just being able to put on our clothes. For others, it\u2019s going to therapy; or for some, it\u2019s taking medication; for some, it\u2019s going to a counselor or leaving a church. I mean, everybody\u2019s got a different bravery. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut I like how the verse, you know, it is, \u201cWait patiently for the Lord.\u201d The Lord, then, can show you: \u201cWhat is your brave?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis: And if we have a listener, who\u2019s wanting to know how you cultivate bravery, I want to encourage you to do a little Bible study. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOpen your Bible to the Book of Joshua, the first chapter \/ first nine verses. And I\u2019m not going to tell you what all three of the commands are in here, but all three command people to be courageous. Courage comes from a combination of being on God\u2019s mission for your life, being obedient to the Scriptures, and practicing His presence, which will stiffen your backbone.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes! Beautifully said!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Lee, I think you\u2019ve done a great job here of reminding us that what God cares about is our character more than our appearance and that being brave is the new beautiful. That\u2019s the title of the book Lee has written\u2014that we\u2019ve got in our <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>Resource Center. You can go online to order <em>Brave is the New Beautiful: Finding the Courage to Be the Real You. <\/em>Order, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to order: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t1-800-FL-TODAY is the number\u20141-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, we hope that, as we have conversations like this, that listeners are not simply informed or even encouraged, but we hope that what happens, as a result of your time listening to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>,is that change happens in your heart\u2014in the way you think \/ in how you interact with family members, friends, and your spouse. Our goal, here, at FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> is to effectively develop godly marriages and families. Our prayer, with each program, is that God will use this program to bring change in your life, in your marriage, and in your family. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe appreciate those of you who partner with us to make this program possible. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you are a supporter of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, every time you make a donation, you make it possible for hundreds of thousands of people, all around the world, to hear practical biblical help and hope for their marriage and their family. On behalf of those who have benefitted from today\u2019s program, I want to say, \u201cThank you for being a partner with us.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you can help with a donation today, we\u2019d like to express our thanks by sending you the 2019 FamilyLife calendar. This calendar is all about togetherness in the family. In fact, it\u2019s filled with togetherness tips designed to provide you with practical ways you can build togetherness in your family in the new year; and there\u2019s a Scripture verse each month that your family can memorize\u2014that\u2019s one way you build togetherness in a family. The 2019 FamilyLife calendar is our thank-you gift when you support the ministry today. Go online to make a donation at FamilyLifeToday.com, or call 1-800-FLTODAY to make a donation over the phone. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019d like to mail your donation to us, request the calendar when you write to <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; and our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we want to talk about what was one of the hardest seasons in Lee Blum\u2019s life, when she experienced clinical depression, and how she found strength to be brave in the midst of that. We\u2019ll talk more about that tomorrow. I hope you can be with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2018 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:26:29"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["24.25M"],"filesize_raw":["25430070"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-300411.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-300411.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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Wolfe Blum remembers her youth and the powerful, damaging message, \"you don't matter.\" Blum encourages women to be authentic in the midst of struggles.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-10-11.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Is there anyone in your life\u2014in your circle of influence\u2014who\u2019s struggling with something right now? Lee Wolfe Blum says, \u201cOf course, there is!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> None of us have to look far to find them\u2014they\u2019re your next-door neighbor; they\u2019re sitting in your church; they\u2019re in your grocery store. The reality is that <em>everyone<\/em> is fighting a battle you don\u2019t know about\u2014<em>everyone!<\/em> And to think that we walk around, and we look at each other, and we get jealous of each other, when the reality is\u2014we need to <em>stop<\/em> and say: \u201cHey, what\u2019s going on with you? Tell me about your life.\u201d Just stop and listen, and be a friend.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Thursday, October 11<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. We\u2019re going to talk today about how we can help bring courage to people in our lives who are struggling to be brave. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. You know, I was just looking at the back of this book we\u2019re going to be talking about, and I saw that our guest loves to help women find hope and healing from perfectionism and addictions.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Wow!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And I thought, \u201cWe\u2019ve probably got some listeners who could use a little help with both of those.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And it also talks about how to be brave.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And how brave is the new beautiful. In fact, that\u2019s the name of her book. Lee Wolfe Blum joins us on <em>FamilyLife Today. <\/em>Lee, welcome to the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Thank you so much for having me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Lee is from Minnesota.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes; Edina, where I was born! Give me a fist bump on that. [Laughter] We are both cake-eaters; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Cake-eaters.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Hold on. You\u2019ve now mentioned that three times before we came on the air, and now you\u2019ve mentioned it again. It went past me the other three times. I kept wanting to stop you.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I think it\u2019s\u2014isn\u2019t it a reference to \u201cLet them eat cake?\u201d It\u2019s kind of where the upper-crust\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014you know, in Edina, you\u2019re of royal blood\u2014that\u2019s basically what it is.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> And they say Edina is: \u201cEvery Day I Need Attention.\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Oh! I didn\u2019t know that! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Oh! [Laughter] I like that!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I\u2019m so sad you told that to Dennis!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> I wasn\u2019t born there, though. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> This explains <em>everything<\/em>! I want our listeners to write in about this and just tell me\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Please!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u201cIs it a part of Bob\u2019s DNA or not?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Edina: Every Day I Need Attention. [Laughter] Okay; now, I need counseling. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, we\u2019ve got one right here in the studio\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I know!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014because Lee is a mental health practitioner. I think Bob\u2019s in deeper trouble, though, than you can possible help! [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe\u2019s a speaker and author, and married to Chris since 1996\u2014and has three\u2014count them\u2014three teenaged boys.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> There\u2019s nothing quite as challenging as that; is there?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> No! Thank God we have a girl dog. [Laughter] They are a challenge.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You got invited to speak at your church, and this was something that you were excited about. I mean, you had always kind of <em>hoped<\/em> that you would get an opportunity to speak; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Oh, you\u2019re picking that story\u2014okay; yes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And you got the invitation. You were excited; and as you got to thinking about it, it became less exciting?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Well, she was in the audience, listening to somebody else speak; wasn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes; actually, the story is: I was born the third child in a family that made us five. I grew up with this message that: \u201cTables weren\u2019t made for five,\u201d and \u201cRoller coasters aren\u2019t made for five.\u201d So a message, very early on in my life, was, \u201cYou don\u2019t matter.\u201d Then the other piece was: \u201cI was the accident.\u201d It was this message, constantly through my life, of: \u201cYou don\u2019t matter,\u201d and \u201cYou\u2019re an accident.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI spent a great deal of my early childhood and young adulthood trying to figure out how to make myself matter. I did become a Christian in high school through Young Life\u2014thank God\u2014because I grew up in a non-Christian home.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> That only enhanced my perfectionism of: \u201cI\u2019m just going to make myself perfect!\u201d Making myself perfect and making myself matter\u2014it led me into a life-threatening eating disorder. When I was in my early 20s, I had an eating disorder; and while I was in the hospital, many, many people said to me, \u201cYou will always have an eating disorder.\u201d And I thought, \u201cIsn\u2019t that interesting?\u201d And the other thing\u2014and we can also talk about this later\u2014they also said, \u201cIf you would just pray, you would be healed.\u201d There was really this dissonance of: \u201cHow do I make sense of this?\u201d and there was no other person I had met that had recovered from an eating disorder. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, if we fast-forward, I did actually move into recovery in my early 20s. About ten years into recovery, I decided\u2014crazy!\u2014I don\u2019t know why I decided this: \u201cI\u2019m going to write a book!\u201d Now, nobody had ever said to me that I was a good writer. Nobody had ever said I should write a book, but I just really felt like I wanted to write a book. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI wanted to write a story that shows both, because God heals us\u2014He does! You can recover, but nobody had shown me that when I was sick. I wanted to write that story. The book came out\u2014my first book, <em>Table in the Darkness: A Memoir<\/em>. My church asked me to come and speak.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI thought I had arrived; right? I am thinking\u2014and here it is\u2014that same kind of message that I had grown up with: \u201cI have to prove I matter. I have to prove my worth.\u201d I thought: \u201cI have arrived! This is it!\u201d\u2014right?\u2014\u201cThese people are going to come up to me and talk to me, and they\u2019re going to give me kudos.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis other author came as well. She was a very, very popular author. She got up to speak, and I got up to speak; and, after, they said, \u201cBoth of the authors are going to be at the table for a book-signing.\u201d I put on my lipstick\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Oh, I know where this is going! Dennis has had this happen to him too.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00 <\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe has!\u2014haven\u2019t you?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I\u2019ve got a story you\u2019ve got to hear. This story will really encourage <em>you<\/em>, but go ahead\u2014finish yours. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Okay; so I put on my lipstick\u2014you know, because I always put on my lipstick\u2014and I stood there and just waited for all of these people\u2014right?\u2014to come and tell me how great my book was, and how much it helped them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes, I understand; I understand. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Not a single person came up to me. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Nobody?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> None! They all walked to <em>her<\/em>. I mean, I could <em>feel<\/em> the wind as they were passing me by. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Sorry.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> But it was such\u2014as hard as it was, it was such a valuable lesson for me: \u201cThis is <em>not <\/em>who I am. I don\u2019t matter because people say I matter. I matter because God calls me \u2018the beloved.\u2019\u201d That, then, is also part of what propelled me to write the second book, <em>Brave Is the New Beautiful<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> So, do you want to hear about the time Dennis and Max Lucado spoke together?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Oh! Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Do we need to say more?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I gave this message, and it was <em>really <\/em>a good message on honoring your parents. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s really the craving of the culture right now; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Nobody wants to hear that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And there was a book-signing afterwards. I sat down at the table, like you. It wasn\u2019t that no one came by.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Did you put your lipstick on?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I had\u2014no; no lipstick! [Laughter] I had a family of five who came\u2014one family; okay? So I signed a book for them; but meanwhile, I could see the line\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014the line that formed that started at Max\u2019s table, went downstairs\u2014two floors\u2014and out into the parking lot. Here\u2019s my conclusion: \u201cI was not that bad, and Max was not that good!\u201d [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> \u201cSomewhere in the middle!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Here\u2019s the real story: Max Lucado has sold 100 million books.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right; right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> So it\u2019s not a good comparison to get into\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014what you went through or what I went did. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You\u2019ve sold somewhat less than that yourself.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Somewhat less than 100 million. [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut here\u2019s your point\u2014your point is\u2014you can\u2019t get your measurements of who you are from the world. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You\u2019ve got to go to the Book\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Exactly!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014find out who God is\u2014and measure against who He is and what He\u2019s called you to do; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Exactly; but in the moment, it hurts so badly!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> I went home and cried for a good, long time. It hurt! And it was such a <em>good<\/em>\u2014like it was God saying: \u201cYou know what? You\u2019ve got to knock this off! You\u2019ve been doing this your whole, entire life, Lee! You keep doing it; it\u2019s not going to work for you!\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> It was a great lesson for me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> What I ended up doing was getting at the end of Max\u2019s line. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You got one of those books autographed!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; but you know, what you\u2019re saying is really good here. I appreciate your authenticity. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere are lessons to be learned, even when things don\u2019t turn out the way you hoped.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right; right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> And think about wives and moms today. Think about young girls, who are growing up today\u2014and this is not exclusively an issue that women face\u2014but maybe, disproportionately, women are being introspective and wondering, \u201cWhat does define me?\u201d Maybe men are getting it from the workplace\u2014I don\u2019t know\u2014but I meet a lot of women, who seem troubled by their sense of worth or value\u2014wondering if they have any\u2014because of what the culture is telling them or not telling them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014especially around beauty\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Exactly.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> \u2014and just to remind folks: \u201cBrave is the new beautiful<em>.<\/em>\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> You\u2019re calling women, as well as men, to a character quality.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> That\u2019s what you\u2019re saying is beautiful.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> And it\u2019s not because I just wrote this sentence down and thought that this would be a good idea. It\u2019s because I saw it with my own eyes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAfter I wrote the first book, I thought: \u201cOkay; that was it. It was a one-time deal.\u201d But then, after the book came out, I\u2014especially living in Edina\u2014I was terrified of what these <em>other<\/em> women would think of me. I remember being at my kids\u2019 school carnival, and walking around the hallways, looking at these women who looked perfect\u2014like they looked like they had everything together! Even though, in my head, I know that\u2019s not true, it <em>looked<\/em> to be so. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI thought: \u201cWhen they read my book about my eating disorder, and about my depression, and about my cutting, and all these awful things about <em>me<\/em> and what I did, they are going to run from me! They are going to cancel playdates. They are going to whisper about me.\u201d I even asked my husband: \u201cCan we just move? Can we change our name?\u201d\u2014you know, like, \u201cWhat am I doing?! Why am I doing this?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd what I found was the exact opposite to be true. These women came out of the woodworks. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey came out, and they said\u2014and this first book was published in 2013. They came to me and they said: \u201cThank you! Thank you!\u201d And then, they said: \u201cMe too,\u201d \u201cThank you,\u201d\u2014maybe not\u2014\u201cMe too; I have an eating disorder,\u201d or maybe not \u201cMe too; I struggled with depression,\u201d but \u201cMe too; my marriage is struggling,\u201d or \u201cMe too; I have anxiety,\u201d or \u201cMe too; I feel like I can\u2019t talk at a party.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI started kind of wondering, like: \u201cWhy does everyone look like they have it together? \u2014and yet, behind the scenes\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> \u2014because I work at a hospital, with patients who struggle with eating disorders and addictions. I <em>know<\/em> what\u2019s behind the scenes here. <em>Why <\/em>are we not talking about this?! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen I read the quote by C.S. Lewis\u2014and for some reason, it was the first time I had ever read it\u2014and it\u2019s: \u201cWhen one person says to another: \u2018You too? I thought I was the only one!\u2019 <em>that<\/em> is when true friendship begins.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis book, actually, was supposed to be called <em>Me Too<\/em>\u2014I had pitched it as <em>Me Too. <\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>\u00a0<\/em>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee: <\/strong>That was why I wanted it to be about \u201cMe too,\u201d because I wanted to explore: \u201cWhy are we doing this, as women?! Why are we doing this to each other?\u201d I feel alone; you feel alone. The suicide rate in the United States for women has risen to an all-time high in the last 30 years, and a lot of it is women. \u201cWhat is happening to us, as women?\u201d\u2014I wanted to explore that, so I pitched it to a publisher. They liked the idea; they changed the title.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI interviewed hundreds of women. I\u2019ll tell you what! I did not have to look far to find these women. None of us have to look far to find them\u2014they\u2019re your next-door neighbor; they\u2019re sitting in your church; they\u2019re in your grocery store. The reality is that <em>everyone<\/em> is fighting a battle you don\u2019t know about\u2014<em>everyone!<\/em> And to think that we walk around, and we look at each other, and we get jealous of each other, when the reality is\u2014we need to stop and say: \u201cHey, what\u2019s going on with you? Tell me about your life,\u201d\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014just stop and listen, and be a friend.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Lee, you titled your book, <em>Brave Is the New Beautiful<\/em>. Define that word, and then explain to women how they find bravery.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> So one of the things that I found through interviewing these women was asking that question: \u201cTell me your story,\u201d\u2014just: \u201cTell me your story.\u201d In it\u2014as they would, and I was so honored! Honestly, there\u2019s nothing more honorable than having someone sit with you and share their deepest hurts and their deepest pains\u2014like, \u201cTell me your story.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd then, as they would tell me their story: \u201cYou are so brave!\u201d\u2014right?\u2014like: \u201cThat is so brave!\u201d\u2014you know, women who have been in abusive marriages; or another woman in the book who went through adoption and had to return the kids\u2014I mean, <em>really <\/em>difficult stuff! Another woman\u2014you know, plenty of stories of women who have lost children: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cHow do you keep on going? How do you love God through that?\u201d Women who have been in cults, and yet still love Jesus with all of their heart\u2014how does that happen?\u2014that is brave! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut then I would ask these women, \u201cDo you think you\u2019re brave?\u201d Do you know what every single one of them said?\u2014\u201cNo.\u201d Not a single one said, \u201cI think I\u2019m brave,\u201d which, then, is another piece of all this. Not only do we sit and look at each other\u2014we get jealous of each other, and we do all this comparing\u2014but then, when we are doing amazing things and really stepping out in bravery and courage, we don\u2019t even think we\u2019re brave. We demure, and we just kind of shrink back. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThrough all of this, I also, you know\u2014hearing these women\u2019s stories\u2014also helped me to be [braver]. So that\u2019s really how you are brave\u2014is when you are brave, and another woman sees you being brave, that helps <em>her<\/em> be brave. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut if we just hide behind our doors, and pretend like we have it all together, <em>nothing\u2019s<\/em> going to change.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> It\u2019s almost like bravery is: \u201cLook, I\u2019m not perfect. I\u2019ll admit that. I\u2019ve got flaws just like everybody else, by the way.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u201cBut I\u2019m not going to try to hide them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u201cAnd I have experienced grace, so I can be honest about my flaws.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you can\u2019t, you need to learn how to do that; because that\u2019s where bravery is\u2014it\u2019s standing up in a world that values perfection\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014that airbrushes everything \/ that gives us an unreal picture of what humanity is\u2014to stand up and say: \u201cYou know what? I\u2019m flawed at a deep level. I\u2019ve had failures. I have things I\u2019m ashamed of that are a part of my past. I\u2019ve learned how to find grace for those things, and I can live in that today.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s a brave person; isn\u2019t it?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> It is, but I think it gets a little tricky in the Christian culture sometimes\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> \u2014because we\u2019re supposed to be kind; and we\u2019re supposed to be nice, and all of these things. We sometimes get so much over here to: \u201cI\u2019m looking like I\u2019m a good Christian.\u201d Then we put on this mask, and we don\u2019t want to talk about the tough stuff.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> And actually, I learn a lot from my patients that I work with. I think I\u2019ll always do the work that I do, because I learn <em>so much <\/em>from people who are in the trenches of really struggling. One patient said this to me one day, and I love it\u2014is that: \u201cEveryone wants to be perfect, but nobody wants to be around perfect.\u201d That is so true! When I go to my girlfriend\u2019s house, whose house is all tidy\/put together\u2014decorated beautifully\u2014I feel uncomfortable. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> I have this other girlfriend\u2014that she\u2014when we go to her house, it\u2019s kind of messy\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014I feel so much more comfortable. I\u2019m not saying: \u201cOkay; everybody! Let\u2019s go and be messy!\u201d But what I am saying is\u2014I\u2019d much rather be around somebody who\u2019s real and authentic than somebody who is trying <em>so hard <\/em>to look like they have it all together.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> You talk about two women\u2014in your book, you tell the story of two patients: Shannon and Jenny\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014who are both dealing with eating disorders; right?\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014but dealing with them very differently.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes; yes. One of the patients that you\u2019re referring to is somebody who was bitten by a dog. Her primary focus in life\u2014she was a flute player. Because she had been bitten by this dog, her face was then permanently scarred right around her lips. She lost her identity in a couple of things\u2014in how she looked and in her flute playing.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tShe masked that by doing what she could control, which is a lot of eating disorders, of, you know\u2014 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014\u201cIf I could just <em>look <\/em>this certain way\u2026\u201d \u201cIf I could just <em>be<\/em> this certain size\u2026\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, bravery is not about how skinny you can be, or how pretty you can be\u2014it\u2019s just not! You know, I\u2019d rather be with a person who is just living life, and being authentic about it, than somebody who is\u2014like I mentioned before\u2014being perfect and trying to have it all.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod does not call us to that. I think we get it so confused, sometimes, as women. You know, He does not call us to be perfect. I think when we start doing that, we are acting like God. There is only one God!\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> \u2014and it\u2019s not me! The minute I start thinking it\u2019s me is when I\u2019m messed up! The minute I\u2019m like: \u201cYou know what? Thank God I have a Savior, because I am a hot mess!\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> \u2014that is a good place to be! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And sometimes I think, in the midst of our messes, when we\u2019re asked the question if we\u2019re brave\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee: <\/strong>Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>\u2014the answer is, \u201cI\u2019ve never really done anything that was brave.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> The reason we answer it that way is because we really don\u2019t know the definition of what bravery is.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I want to come back to that and say, \u201cHow would you define bravery?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Well, first, you open your Bible\u2014so I\u2019m going to give you two definitions. One that I love\/love in Psalm 27:14, which is very interesting; because it says: \u201cWait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.\u201d How do you do that?! How are you \u201cbrave and courageous\u201d and \u201cwait patiently?\u201d\u2014[Laughter]\u2014those are two different things!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> So a part of bravery\u2014and I am so guilty of this! I\u2019m like a wild bull that, you know, comes out of the gate, ready to go. If I feel like God\u2019s telling me to do something, I just go and do it!\u2014right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> That doesn\u2019t always work very well. In fact, it often gets me into a lot of trouble! [Laughter]\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Right. [Laughter] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut I think that\u2019s an interesting verse, because sometimes the bravest thing we can do\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLee: \u2014is wait.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob: Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis: \u2014is be still\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLee: Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis: \u2014and not say anything.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob: Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLee: So what is brave for me is different than what is brave for you. And for somebody else, it might be: \u201cWait patiently for the Lord\u201d; and that is your bravery. For other people, it might be: \u201cGo and be brave and courageous,\u201d\u2014meaning: \u201cStep out and do something,\u201d\u2014and that is their bravery.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo what I have found bravery is\u2014is that it\u2019s different for everyone. For some people, bravery is just getting out of bed in the morning.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBob: Yes.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLee: For other people, it\u2019s just being able to put on our clothes. For others, it\u2019s going to therapy; or for some, it\u2019s taking medication; for some, it\u2019s going to a counselor or leaving a church. I mean, everybody\u2019s got a different bravery. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut I like how the verse, you know, it is, \u201cWait patiently for the Lord.\u201d The Lord, then, can show you: \u201cWhat is your brave?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDennis: And if we have a listener, who\u2019s wanting to know how you cultivate bravery, I want to encourage you to do a little Bible study. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOpen your Bible to the Book of Joshua, the first chapter \/ first nine verses. And I\u2019m not going to tell you what all three of the commands are in here, but all three command people to be courageous. Courage comes from a combination of being on God\u2019s mission for your life, being obedient to the Scriptures, and practicing His presence, which will stiffen your backbone.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Lee:<\/strong> Yes! Beautifully said!\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Lee, I think you\u2019ve done a great job here of reminding us that what God cares about is our character more than our appearance and that being brave is the new beautiful. That\u2019s the title of the book Lee has written\u2014that we\u2019ve got in our <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>Resource Center. You can go online to order <em>Brave is the New Beautiful: Finding the Courage to Be the Real You. <\/em>Order, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to order: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t1-800-FL-TODAY is the number\u20141-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, we hope that, as we have conversations like this, that listeners are not simply informed or even encouraged, but we hope that what happens, as a result of your time listening to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>,is that change happens in your heart\u2014in the way you think \/ in how you interact with family members, friends, and your spouse. Our goal, here, at FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> is to effectively develop godly marriages and families. Our prayer, with each program, is that God will use this program to bring change in your life, in your marriage, and in your family. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe appreciate those of you who partner with us to make this program possible. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you are a supporter of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>, every time you make a donation, you make it possible for hundreds of thousands of people, all around the world, to hear practical biblical help and hope for their marriage and their family. On behalf of those who have benefitted from today\u2019s program, I want to say, \u201cThank you for being a partner with us.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you can help with a donation today, we\u2019d like to express our thanks by sending you the 2019 FamilyLife calendar. This calendar is all about togetherness in the family. In fact, it\u2019s filled with togetherness tips designed to provide you with practical ways you can build togetherness in your family in the new year; and there\u2019s a Scripture verse each month that your family can memorize\u2014that\u2019s one way you build togetherness in a family. The 2019 FamilyLife calendar is our thank-you gift when you support the ministry today. Go online to make a donation at FamilyLifeToday.com, or call 1-800-FLTODAY to make a donation over the phone. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019d like to mail your donation to us, request the calendar when you write to <em>FamilyLife Today <\/em>at PO Box 7111, Little Rock, AR; and our zip code is 72223.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we want to talk about what was one of the hardest seasons in Lee Blum\u2019s life, when she experienced clinical depression, and how she found strength to be brave in the midst of that. We\u2019ll talk more about that tomorrow. I hope you can be with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2018 FamilyLife. 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