{"id":300279,"date":"2018-06-25T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2018-06-25T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/understanding-mental-illness\/"},"modified":"2024-10-07T22:41:26","modified_gmt":"2024-10-08T02:41:26","slug":"understanding-mental-illness","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/understanding-mental-illness\/","title":{"rendered":"Understanding Mental Illness"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Matthew Stanford believes if Christians want to help those struggling with mental disorders, they have to understand what they are.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-06-25.mp3","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:28:56","filesize":"26.49M","filesize_raw":"27780849","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2846,2873],"tags":[4432,4431,4434,4433],"podcast_series":[7225],"cwp_profile":[8838],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-300279","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-depression","category-mental-and-emotional-issues","tag-compassion","tag-mental-disorders","tag-mental-illness","tag-spiritual-needs","podcast_series-grace-for-the-afflicted","cwp_profile-matthew-stanford","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/300279\/understanding-mental-illness","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/300279\/understanding-mental-illness","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"aIRHcd661n\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/understanding-mental-illness\/\">Understanding Mental Illness<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/understanding-mental-illness\/embed\/#?secret=aIRHcd661n\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Understanding Mental Illness&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"aIRHcd661n\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"spectra_custom_meta":{"_wp_page_template":["default"],"transcript_url":["https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-06-25.pdf"],"audio_file":["https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-06-25.mp3"],"transcript_content":["<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We often think about mental health very differently than we think about our physical health. As Matthew Stanford has observed, we also relate to people differently when we hear about a mental disorder than we do when they\u2019ve been diagnosed with a disease.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>We often refer to mental illness as the no-casserole illness; because when you have cancer or anything, people bring you a casserole at church. It may not heal you, but it certainly makes you feel like someone cares. Tell someone at church that you 28-year-old son just got out of a psychiatric hospital and just got diagnosed with bipolar disorder; there won\u2019t be any casseroles showing up at the door. People tend to kind of run for the hills.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday, June 25<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. How should we think about mental illnesses\/mental disorders, and how should we love our friends who are wrestling with these issues? We\u2019ll talk more about that today. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. We\u2019re going to be revisiting a subject today that we have touched on occasionally over the last many years\u2014but a subject that\u2014well, if this is present in a family\/in a marriage, you\u2019re facing some challenges.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You know, I don\u2019t think the community of faith\u2014those of us who embrace the Bible\u2014give enough credence to just how sin impacted our emotional wellbeing. The Bible begins in Genesis, saying we\u2019re made in the image of God. A part of that, obviously, is God\u2019s character; but our personality, our emotions, our intellect\u2014all of that\u2014is a reflection of who God is. When man sinned, unfortunately, that\u2014which had been perfect\u2014now is flawed. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ll talk about that today as we discuss the subject of mental illness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe have a doctor who has worked both for Baylor University but also taught for a number of years at the Baylor School of Medicine in Houston and has founded a ministry called The Hope and Healing Center and Institute in Houston, Texas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDr. Matthew Stanford joins us on <em>FamilyLife Today. <\/em>Matthew, welcome to the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>Great; thanks for having me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You\u2019ve written a book called <em>Grace for the Afflicted<\/em>\u2014I love the title. Where did this come from? Did this come from your own personal faith, just interacting with people in the church, or did it come about more through the professional arena, where you\u2019ve taught and given so much focus of your life?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>No; it mainly came out through stories that people would come and tell me or questions they would ask me\u2014as a person of faith that was in mental health\u2014when I was in churches. When I was leaving the church, or they saw me at Sunday school, or a Bible study, they\u2019d pull me aside and ask me questions of, you know: \u201cMy son has ADHD. What do you think about that, as a Christian, who\u2019s also a provider?\u201d or, you know: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cA pastor told me that my bipolar disorder is a lack of faith.\u201d Those were very shaping and molding for me. I really started to wonder, \u201cWhy was the church not able to answer those questions for people effectively?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt that point, I really just decided that somebody needed to kind of try to bring this all together. I think my original thought was that I would find what the odd theology was behind this, and I would kind of show it to be wrong; but the reality is\u2014there is no real theology; it\u2019s a lot of fear and naivet\u00e9. It\u2019s not unlike what you find in the general public\u2014a stigma associated with mental illness\u2014but in the church, we just kind of wrap it in kind of an ugly spiritual crust. Unfortunately\u2014instead of showing people grace, and drawing them in, and giving them an opportunity to heal\u2014we really hurt them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, there is a sin connection between our physical health \/ our mental health, as Dennis said. The image of God was marred when humanity fell into sin. We are broken people because of our sin. I think the problem you\u2019re describing is\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014when somebody says, \u201cIt\u2019s because of your active engagement in some sinful activity that your mental health has been affected,\u201d\u2014that\u2019s what you\u2019re pulling back and saying, \u201cThat\u2019s not what the Bible teaches.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>Right; absolutely. I mean, certainly, from an original sin perspective, we get ill because we are broken. We live in a broken world and a fallen world; so you can look at any illness\u2014strep throat, cancer, diabetes\u2014and you can talk about it from a sin perspective\u2014at a high level of original sin\u2014but very few, if almost no one in Christendom \/ in the church would say to somebody with diabetes: \u201cYou have a spiritually-generated diabetes. Your weak faith\u2026\u201d or \u201c\u2026lack of faith\u2026\u201d or \u201cA sin you committed yourself\u2026\u201d or \u201cThe demonic is causing you to be diabetic.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut when it comes to mental illness, we treat it very, very differently. We say to people, with mental illness, those types of things; and we hurt them. I think what we need to do is\u2014we need to step up and say: \u201cWe do have a role to play \/ a huge role to play in helping people heal and recover from these things. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cWe just need a more grace orientation. We need to treat people with mental health problems the same way we would treat people with any type of health problem.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThese things happen just as often in the church as they happen outside the church; research has shown that. These don\u2019t just affect the person that\u2019s struggling with the illness; they are like a bomb going off in a family\u2014they destroy families. If you have a spouse that has depression, that\u2019s going to reverberate through the entire family\u2014it\u2019s going to affect the marital relationship \/ the relationship with the children; it\u2019s going to affect their finances.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe need to be compassionate in the same way we would be compassionate if we found out that the person sitting next to us in the pew was suddenly diagnosed with cancer. We would show compassion towards them. Unfortunately\u2014because of the stigma and kind of fear that we have in the general public around mental illness\u2014when you find out somebody has a mental illness, you tend to have more of a feeling of fear or concern for yourself or the situation you\u2019re in as opposed to, when you find out someone has cancer, it\u2019s all about compassion and care. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe often refer to mental illness as the no-casserole illness; because when you have cancer or anything, people bring you a casserole at church. It may not heal you, but it certainly makes you feel like someone cares. Tell someone at church that your 28-year-old son just got out of a psychiatric hospital and got diagnosed with bipolar disorder; there won\u2019t be any casseroles showing up at the door. People tend to kind of run for the hills.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Matthew, we look at behavioral kinds of issues and all of us, as parents, know that part of our job is to help mold and shape our children\u2019s behavior. It\u2019s a cause-effect\u2014we discipline them; they behave correctly. So when we see someone, whose behavior is erratic, is unusual, is destructive, we default to thinking: \u201cSomebody has not taught this person correctly. They just haven\u2019t been disciplined into this. Their circumstances \/ the environment they grew up in\u2014this is what shaped this behavior.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWith mental disorders, what does shape the behavior?\u2014is this biological?\u2014is this the effect of traumatic stress? What is shaping schizophrenia or bipolar disorder?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>Well, every mental illness \/ every mental disorder is a combination of biology and environment. Now, the balance between those is going to vary between the different illnesses. It could mean everything from the prenatal care that your mother received or problems during birth\u2014to the way that your parents responded to you, emotionally, or disciplined you\u2014or \u201cDid you grow up in poverty?\u201d \u201cDid you grow up in wealth?\u201d\u2014all of those types of stressors, in combination with the kind of temperament you\u2019re born with, and things like that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor instance, schizophrenia\u2014one of the things I tell people, that they often don\u2019t understand, is: \u201cIf a person has schizophrenia, and they don\u2019t receive any treatment, they can lose up to five percent of their brain mass a year, because it\u2019s degenerative; literally, their brain is dying. That\u2019s not something that you just pray away; that\u2019s not something that you just need to read the Scriptures more. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, something like depression or anxiety disorders, certainly, those exist in subclinical senses. We often say we\u2019re depressed when we\u2019re sad. When I say, \u201cdepression,\u2019 I mean a disorder that has a certain set of criteria\u2014it\u2019s more than just sadness; it\u2019s a debilitating disorder. So, it\u2019s a combination of both biology and environment or situational\u2014things that come on\u2014certainly, we understand that a child could be traumatized and that that would bring about later mental health problems. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think\u2014back to the original aspect of your question\u2014we don\u2019t have any problem understanding that your heart is an organ; and it pumps blood; and that, if it doesn\u2019t pump blood right, then you have problems related to your heart. But when it comes to thoughts, and feelings, and the control of behavior, we like to think of those in a very, kind of nonmaterial, kind of ethereal way. We forget that the brain inside of your head\u2014you know, when it comes right down to it, you have three pounds of meat in your head; and it can be damaged.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen we look at people with Alzheimer\u2019s disease, we don\u2019t look at them and say: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cOh, you know, if he just prayed more\u2026\u201d \u201cIf he just studied the Scriptures more\u2026\u201d or \u201cIf he was just a better husband, he wouldn\u2019t have that.\u201d But when you look at somebody with OCD, obsessive-compulsive disorder, I do hear people say that. In both instances, it\u2019s a brain disorder. We have to remember that our brain can be dysfunctional. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI would add to that\u2014people with mental health problems\u2014they have the same spiritual needs \/ the same spiritual wants and desires that everyone else has; but they\u2019re trying to fight through an organ\u2014the same organ that we think with, feel with, connect with is the same organ we pray with\u2014that they\u2019re trying to fight through that. Their perceptions of the world are off; their perceptions of God are off.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJust to give you an example\u2014so many people that I\u2019ve worked with, that have depression, tell me: \u201cWell, I don\u2019t feel like I can pray anymore, because I don\u2019t feel worthy to come before God. I don\u2019t feel like He hears me. I can\u2019t hear Him; I don\u2019t feel Him.\u201d A lot of that\u2019s because of the negative feelings that are generated in their brain or the lack of emotion that they feel. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut they have the same kind of spiritual needs that everybody has; it\u2019s just that they\u2019re amplified and distorted. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s where the church, really, can step in, I think, and really give people a foundation for the healing and recovery that can happen.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I would say, speaking of depression: \u201cWhat if you\u2019re married to a person, who really struggles with depression? What\u2019s your responsibility, besides loving?\u201d Obviously, you have to be compassionate, caring, loving; but, just practically speaking, what can a wife do for a husband\u2026\u201d or \u201c\u2026a husband do for a wife, who has this debilitating\u2026\u201d\u2014and again, how\u2019d you describe depression, again? It\u2019s not just a sadness; it is\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>It\u2019s an overwhelming sense of worthlessness or lack of pleasure in things that you found pleasurable before. You literally have negative thoughts and feelings that occur that are outside of your control. You\u2019re constantly feeling as if you\u2019re worthless; you feel disconnected, emotionally, from the world; you just feel numb; and you simply aren\u2019t able to function normally. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think that\u2019s really the key\u2014when you cross over the line of disorder, you go from being able to function to not being able to function anymore. That\u2019s really the difference here between just being sad and being depressed.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs far as a couple goes, as I said, mental illness is like a bomb that goes off in a family. In couples, where one of the individuals has a mental illness, the divorce rate is <em>extremely<\/em> high. That\u2019s not because it\u2019s some type of absolute prophecy of doom. The problem is that, typically, people don\u2019t get help. The majority of people in the United States today with mental health problems receive no treatment.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo what happens is\u2014say a husband has depression\u2014and now, he\u2019s having trouble holding a job; and he has relational issues with his wife; and she\u2019s trying to hold everything together herself. He\u2019s not getting any treatment, so he\u2019s not getting any better. She doesn\u2019t understand what\u2019s going on; because it\u2019s not like he just wakes up one day and says, \u201cI think I have depression,\u201d\u2014he doesn\u2019t know what\u2019s going on either. She thinks he\u2019s lazy \/ just doesn\u2019t want to work; arguing in front of the kids; and then financial problems; and that leads to the divorce. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019re struggling with that kind of situation, where it seems like your spouse \/ something has changed in your spouse\u2014they\u2019re acting in a way they weren\u2019t acting before \/ they were a provider before and now they\u2019re not; they sleep all the time now when they didn\u2019t do that before\u2014they\u2019re having symptoms that you may relate to some type of mental health problem. What I would say is: \u201cYou need to get them to a physician to have a physical; and then you need to have them talk to that physician about what they are experiencing and see if they need a referral to a mental health provider.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs far as the loved one goes\u2014the wife or the husband\u2014you need to get yourself into a support group. You need to educate yourself about the problem that your loved one has. Research shows that, if an individual family member just gets into a support group\u2014a psycho-educational group, where they learn about the illness\u2014even if the loved one is not getting treatment for their illness, the loved one will show improvement. You can\u2019t do this on your own; there\u2019s no need to. You also need to get connected with a faith community that\u2019s supportive of people that are struggling with mental health problems. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDon\u2019t try to do this on your own; there\u2019s no reason to do that. Treatments are effective and they\u2019re available. They\u2019re difficult to access, but they are available.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I\u2019m glad you mentioned that, because it seems there are treatments that are available for those who are depressed and need the help. But if you\u2019re married to someone like that, that person is impacted, like you said, dramatically. The idea of a faith-support group that\u2014isn\u2019t just spiritualizing the problem but practically talks about the impact of this on a marriage\/ on a family\u2014and hopefully, can provide understanding to know how to really love in a biblical way in the midst of that crisis.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>Absolutely. I mean, really, in a sense\u2014you know, one of the things we talk about is, depending on where your loved one is in this recovery process\u2014if they\u2019re in the distressed part of this\u2014where they are not functional, and they\u2019re really not able to care for themselves right now, and they\u2019re not getting mental healthcare\u2014the spouse has really become nothing more than a caretaker\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014you can\u2019t have a normal marital relationship. You\u2019re caring for this individual in a very physical way. You\u2019re having to take care of their finances \/ having to take care of them, physically.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>You\u2019re not going to be able to move forward until the loved one begins to get some care, and you\u2019re not going to be able to move forward until you get the support that you need. A lot of times, what I find is that the loved one is trying to relate to the individual, who\u2019s in distress, just in a normal\u2014either as a wife, or a mother, or whatever\u2014when the individual is actually needing them just to be a caretaker and care for them. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThese are the kinds of things you learn in a support group. I mean, there are all types of faith-based support groups out there that are available, probably, right around the corner from you\u2014that will really make a <em>huge<\/em> difference. I\u2019ll often say that individuals\u2014the loved ones \/ the caregivers\u2014they are the forgotten victims of mental illness. We don\u2019t do that with other\u2014you know, for instance, we\u2019re very good now with dementia caregivers. There are lots of support groups, and it\u2019s very accepted. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut for mental health problems or even addiction, a lot of times, we just kind of let those people go. We just don\u2019t think about the impact it has on their family.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Why is that, though, with somebody who has dementia? Why does that get a preferential pass by the Christian community \/ the community of faith; and someone\u2014who\u2019s married to a person, who\u2019s deeply depressed, doesn\u2019t?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>I\u2019m not sure why. I think perhaps because dementia happens at an elder state\u2014the person\u2019s older. I think people can understand that, in a sense, their brain is kind of breaking down. But when you\u2019re younger, you know\u2014and you\u2019re in your 40s or 50s, and you\u2019re struggling with depression\u2014they look at you, physically, and they say: \u201cOh, look! He\u2019s not frail. He should be able to work. He should be able to do whatever. He just needs to get over it.\u201d Whereas, you know, if you\u2019re an 85-year-old man, struggling with dementia, people think: \u201cOh, well that makes sense. He\u2019s just getting old.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut you\u2019re right; there is no difference. It has the same effect on the caregiver that someone with depression, bipolar disorder, or schizophrenia would. When I say that\u2014you know, we\u2019re talking about marital relationships right now\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014it\u2019s the same thing for parents with adult children. One of the most things we deal with at the Hope and Healing Center and Institute are the parents of adult children with mental illness\u2014so a 28-year-old or a 30-year-old individual, who has schizophrenia or bipolar disorder\u2014and now you have an individual whose brain is literally not functioning correctly; their perceptions of the world are off, and they\u2019re an adult. In our society, we allow an adult to make their own decisions for care, even if they\u2019re delusional.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have a client, right now, that is a 33-year-old woman, who has schizoaffective disorder, which is probably the <em>worst<\/em> of all mental illnesses\u2014it\u2019s like having schizophrenia, where you are psychotic and delusional \/ you have hallucinations; and bipolar disorder at the same time\u2014her moods swing between high, euphoric states and real low depression. She doesn\u2019t believe she\u2019s ill\u2014even though, in the same week she told me there was nothing wrong with her, she told me she had wood nymphs living inside of her. She also often thinks she has demons living inside of her, and that\u2019s why she\u2019s having problems in her life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut she doesn\u2019t believe she\u2019s ill; and because she doesn\u2019t believe she\u2019s ill, we can\u2019t force care on her unless she\u2019s a danger to herself or others. Her parents struggle; because here they are\u2014they want to care for their daughter\u2014their daughter says she\u2019s not ill. The way we have our HIPPA and our law set up, we can\u2019t make her get any treatment. She lives in a delusional nightmare; and her parents suffer, and she suffers.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelping the parents [is] something we can do. I can only help her as much as she\u2019ll allow me to; but the parents\u2014I definitely can get them a support group \/ offer them support\u2014and that\u2019s, again, where the church can step up and just really say: \u201cWe\u2019re going to be with you in this. We\u2019re going to walk through this nightmare with you until your daughter gives us the opportunity to get her some help.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>One of the people who has affirmed your book is Kay Warren. We\u2019re all aware of the suicide of their son. That kind of a situation causes every parent to go: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cWhat could I have done? How could I have known this or prevented this?\u201d What do we do in situations, where these kinds of things happen; and as parents we go, \u201cSurely, I did something wrong here or could have made this better for my child.\u201d How do we deal with that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>Yes; suicide\u2019s a really difficult thing. I think, first and foremost, I would say that suicide is evidence that people die from mental illness; because 90 percent-plus of people that die by suicide\u2014at the time of their death\u2014were struggling with a mental health problem. Kay and Rick Warren\u2019s son, Matthew\u2014he actually died from a mental illness, and suicide is just the expression of that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFirst, I would say this: I\u2019m a provider\u2014I\u2019ve worked with probably hundreds, if not a thousand, people in my life. I\u2019ve had clients die by suicide. If I didn\u2019t see it\u2014I mean, some of them, certainly, were deteriorating; we were concerned\u2014other ones weren\u2019t. It\u2019s a very difficult thing to predict. There are certainly things that you can take into account. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf your loved one has a mental illness, they are at a high risk for suicide; you just have to understand that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPeople that are more prone to suicide\u2014or they\u2019re increasing in their likelihood of committing suicide\u2014do tend to talk about death and dying more often; you know, they say, \u201cI wish I\u2019d never been born.\u201d I often tell people: \u201cLook at the third chapter of Job. There\u2019s no better example in any textbook I\u2019ve ever seen of suicidal ideation than that third chapter, where Job says: \u2018I wish I\u2019d never been born. I wish You\u2019d taken me; I wish\u2026\u2019 I mean, he is overwhelmed; and he\u2019s expressing that. Those are the same types of things that clients will begin to talk about.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere <em>are<\/em> some things you can look for; but ultimately, I would say this\u2014when someone dies by suicide, it\u2019s no one\u2019s fault. That individual, at the time of their suicide, believed that what they were doing was a good thing\u2014it was a right thing. It\u2019s not a reasoned decision; they\u2019re perceptions are off. People don\u2019t try to commit suicide to get attention\u2014that\u2019s a myth. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think, if your loved one has a mental health problem, then you need to talk to both <em>them<\/em> and their mental health care provider, if you\u2019re allowed, about their risk for suicide and what you can do to diminish that. Again, that\u2019s a reason that you want to get in a support group. You also can learn\u2014when you start to see that your loved one is deteriorating, and catch it way early\u2014before they get to a point where they might be suicidal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>If I had someone, who was struggling with mental illness in my family, I\u2019d have a copy of your book, <em>Grace for the Afflicted<\/em>. I\u2019d have it open; I\u2019d be reading it\u2014two reasons: number one, I don\u2019t think we, in the Christian community, know how to process mental illness in other people. We look for categories and quick fixes. We don\u2019t put it in the same category\u2014that you just helped us think through\u2014physical diseases. Secondly, once someone is diagnosed or is just troubled, emotionally, we don\u2019t know what to do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe want a quick, biblical answer for that and just say: \u201cPray about it. Ask God to fix you. You can do what\u2019s right. You can just <em>will<\/em> yourself past this.\u201d We\u2019re really <em>flawed<\/em> in our thinking, from a biblical perspective.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m just sitting here, listening to you, and I\u2019m thinking, \u201cWhat a gift you are to the body of Christ\u2014just to help us, as a community, to think <em>rightly<\/em> about what\u2019s going on in people\u2019s lives, who were made in the image of God.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, and to have the kind of information we\u2019ve been talking about this week in a book\u2014that has now been recently revised and updated\u2014I think is very helpful for pastors or for people, who have friends or loved ones, who are dealing with some of these disorders. The book that we\u2019re talking about is called <em>Grace for the Afflicted: A Clinical and Biblical Perspective on Mental Illness<\/em>. It\u2019s written by our guest, Matthew Stanford. We have copies of the book in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. You can order from us, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY to order. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, our website: FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, the conversation we\u2019ve been having today\u2014these are the kinds of conversations, where we often hear from listeners, who say, \u201cThank you for providing us with some real help and some real hope in the midst of an affliction that we don\u2019t find help for in other places.\u201d Our goal, here, at FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> is to provide practical biblical help and hope for marriages and families on all kinds of relationship issues \/ all kinds of struggles and stresses that families face. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe appreciate those of you who make the work of FamilyLife possible\u2014those of you who are regular monthly donors, Legacy Partners, and those of you who will, from time to time, make a donation to sustain the work of this ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYour funds go directly toward the expansion of this radio program, our digital platform, the development of resources designed to help strengthen families, and the events that we host throughout the year. In fact, the vast majority of our budget is covered by friends, like you, who donate to this ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019re a long-time listener, and you\u2019ve never made a donation, today would be a great day for you to join the team. In fact, this time of year is a great time of year for us to hear from regular listeners who want to help support the work of FamilyLife. The summer months can be a challenge for ministries, like ours; so we love hearing from you during months like this.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we have a resource that we want to make available to you. Whether you can make a donation or not, our team has developed a four-week devotional called <em>The Growing Together<\/em> devotion series. This is designed for families to do together. There are activities; there are things to read together. You can do this, as a couple \/ you can do it with the kids, and it\u2019s a free download. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGo to FamilyLifeToday.com to find out more about the <em>Growing Together<\/em> devotion series. Over the next four weeks, it will give you something that you can do together, as a family, to help focus your heart and mind on God and on His Word.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to continue talking with Matthew Stanford about different mental illnesses or mental disorders that people are facing today and how we think rightly about those issues. I hope you can tune in for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2018 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>"],"_seopress_titles_title":[""],"_seopress_titles_desc":[""],"_seopress_robots_index":[""],"duration":["00:28:56"],"show_notes":[""],"_thumbnail_id":["294104"],"filesize":["26.49M"],"filesize_raw":["27780849"],"_uag_css_file_name":["uag-css-300279.css"],"_uag_js_file_name":["uag-js-300279.js"],"_uag_page_assets":["a:9:{s:3:\"css\";s:82560:\".wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-top svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-top .uagb-container__shape-fill{fill: rgba(51,51,51,1);}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape-bottom svg{width: calc( 100% + 1.3px );}.wp-block-uagb-container.uagb-block-e11dbe9f .uagb-container__shape.uagb-container__shape-bottom 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Stanford believes if Christians want to help those struggling with mental disorders, they have to understand what they are.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-06-25.pdf","transcript_content":"<strong>Bob: <\/strong>We often think about mental health very differently than we think about our physical health. As Matthew Stanford has observed, we also relate to people differently when we hear about a mental disorder than we do when they\u2019ve been diagnosed with a disease.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>We often refer to mental illness as the no-casserole illness; because when you have cancer or anything, people bring you a casserole at church. It may not heal you, but it certainly makes you feel like someone cares. Tell someone at church that you 28-year-old son just got out of a psychiatric hospital and just got diagnosed with bipolar disorder; there won\u2019t be any casseroles showing up at the door. People tend to kind of run for the hills.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Monday, June 25<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey, and I'm Bob Lepine. How should we think about mental illnesses\/mental disorders, and how should we love our friends who are wrestling with these issues? We\u2019ll talk more about that today. Stay with us.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us. We\u2019re going to be revisiting a subject today that we have touched on occasionally over the last many years\u2014but a subject that\u2014well, if this is present in a family\/in a marriage, you\u2019re facing some challenges.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You know, I don\u2019t think the community of faith\u2014those of us who embrace the Bible\u2014give enough credence to just how sin impacted our emotional wellbeing. The Bible begins in Genesis, saying we\u2019re made in the image of God. A part of that, obviously, is God\u2019s character; but our personality, our emotions, our intellect\u2014all of that\u2014is a reflection of who God is. When man sinned, unfortunately, that\u2014which had been perfect\u2014now is flawed. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ll talk about that today as we discuss the subject of mental illness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe have a doctor who has worked both for Baylor University but also taught for a number of years at the Baylor School of Medicine in Houston and has founded a ministry called The Hope and Healing Center and Institute in Houston, Texas. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDr. Matthew Stanford joins us on <em>FamilyLife Today. <\/em>Matthew, welcome to the broadcast.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>Great; thanks for having me.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>You\u2019ve written a book called <em>Grace for the Afflicted<\/em>\u2014I love the title. Where did this come from? Did this come from your own personal faith, just interacting with people in the church, or did it come about more through the professional arena, where you\u2019ve taught and given so much focus of your life?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>No; it mainly came out through stories that people would come and tell me or questions they would ask me\u2014as a person of faith that was in mental health\u2014when I was in churches. When I was leaving the church, or they saw me at Sunday school, or a Bible study, they\u2019d pull me aside and ask me questions of, you know: \u201cMy son has ADHD. What do you think about that, as a Christian, who\u2019s also a provider?\u201d or, you know: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cA pastor told me that my bipolar disorder is a lack of faith.\u201d Those were very shaping and molding for me. I really started to wonder, \u201cWhy was the church not able to answer those questions for people effectively?\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAt that point, I really just decided that somebody needed to kind of try to bring this all together. I think my original thought was that I would find what the odd theology was behind this, and I would kind of show it to be wrong; but the reality is\u2014there is no real theology; it\u2019s a lot of fear and naivet\u00e9. It\u2019s not unlike what you find in the general public\u2014a stigma associated with mental illness\u2014but in the church, we just kind of wrap it in kind of an ugly spiritual crust. Unfortunately\u2014instead of showing people grace, and drawing them in, and giving them an opportunity to heal\u2014we really hurt them.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, there is a sin connection between our physical health \/ our mental health, as Dennis said. The image of God was marred when humanity fell into sin. We are broken people because of our sin. I think the problem you\u2019re describing is\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014when somebody says, \u201cIt\u2019s because of your active engagement in some sinful activity that your mental health has been affected,\u201d\u2014that\u2019s what you\u2019re pulling back and saying, \u201cThat\u2019s not what the Bible teaches.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>Right; absolutely. I mean, certainly, from an original sin perspective, we get ill because we are broken. We live in a broken world and a fallen world; so you can look at any illness\u2014strep throat, cancer, diabetes\u2014and you can talk about it from a sin perspective\u2014at a high level of original sin\u2014but very few, if almost no one in Christendom \/ in the church would say to somebody with diabetes: \u201cYou have a spiritually-generated diabetes. Your weak faith\u2026\u201d or \u201c\u2026lack of faith\u2026\u201d or \u201cA sin you committed yourself\u2026\u201d or \u201cThe demonic is causing you to be diabetic.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut when it comes to mental illness, we treat it very, very differently. We say to people, with mental illness, those types of things; and we hurt them. I think what we need to do is\u2014we need to step up and say: \u201cWe do have a role to play \/ a huge role to play in helping people heal and recover from these things. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cWe just need a more grace orientation. We need to treat people with mental health problems the same way we would treat people with any type of health problem.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThese things happen just as often in the church as they happen outside the church; research has shown that. These don\u2019t just affect the person that\u2019s struggling with the illness; they are like a bomb going off in a family\u2014they destroy families. If you have a spouse that has depression, that\u2019s going to reverberate through the entire family\u2014it\u2019s going to affect the marital relationship \/ the relationship with the children; it\u2019s going to affect their finances.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe need to be compassionate in the same way we would be compassionate if we found out that the person sitting next to us in the pew was suddenly diagnosed with cancer. We would show compassion towards them. Unfortunately\u2014because of the stigma and kind of fear that we have in the general public around mental illness\u2014when you find out somebody has a mental illness, you tend to have more of a feeling of fear or concern for yourself or the situation you\u2019re in as opposed to, when you find out someone has cancer, it\u2019s all about compassion and care. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe often refer to mental illness as the no-casserole illness; because when you have cancer or anything, people bring you a casserole at church. It may not heal you, but it certainly makes you feel like someone cares. Tell someone at church that your 28-year-old son just got out of a psychiatric hospital and got diagnosed with bipolar disorder; there won\u2019t be any casseroles showing up at the door. People tend to kind of run for the hills.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Matthew, we look at behavioral kinds of issues and all of us, as parents, know that part of our job is to help mold and shape our children\u2019s behavior. It\u2019s a cause-effect\u2014we discipline them; they behave correctly. So when we see someone, whose behavior is erratic, is unusual, is destructive, we default to thinking: \u201cSomebody has not taught this person correctly. They just haven\u2019t been disciplined into this. Their circumstances \/ the environment they grew up in\u2014this is what shaped this behavior.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWith mental disorders, what does shape the behavior?\u2014is this biological?\u2014is this the effect of traumatic stress? What is shaping schizophrenia or bipolar disorder?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>Well, every mental illness \/ every mental disorder is a combination of biology and environment. Now, the balance between those is going to vary between the different illnesses. It could mean everything from the prenatal care that your mother received or problems during birth\u2014to the way that your parents responded to you, emotionally, or disciplined you\u2014or \u201cDid you grow up in poverty?\u201d \u201cDid you grow up in wealth?\u201d\u2014all of those types of stressors, in combination with the kind of temperament you\u2019re born with, and things like that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFor instance, schizophrenia\u2014one of the things I tell people, that they often don\u2019t understand, is: \u201cIf a person has schizophrenia, and they don\u2019t receive any treatment, they can lose up to five percent of their brain mass a year, because it\u2019s degenerative; literally, their brain is dying. That\u2019s not something that you just pray away; that\u2019s not something that you just need to read the Scriptures more. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, something like depression or anxiety disorders, certainly, those exist in subclinical senses. We often say we\u2019re depressed when we\u2019re sad. When I say, \u201cdepression,\u2019 I mean a disorder that has a certain set of criteria\u2014it\u2019s more than just sadness; it\u2019s a debilitating disorder. So, it\u2019s a combination of both biology and environment or situational\u2014things that come on\u2014certainly, we understand that a child could be traumatized and that that would bring about later mental health problems. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think\u2014back to the original aspect of your question\u2014we don\u2019t have any problem understanding that your heart is an organ; and it pumps blood; and that, if it doesn\u2019t pump blood right, then you have problems related to your heart. But when it comes to thoughts, and feelings, and the control of behavior, we like to think of those in a very, kind of nonmaterial, kind of ethereal way. We forget that the brain inside of your head\u2014you know, when it comes right down to it, you have three pounds of meat in your head; and it can be damaged.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhen we look at people with Alzheimer\u2019s disease, we don\u2019t look at them and say: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cOh, you know, if he just prayed more\u2026\u201d \u201cIf he just studied the Scriptures more\u2026\u201d or \u201cIf he was just a better husband, he wouldn\u2019t have that.\u201d But when you look at somebody with OCD, obsessive-compulsive disorder, I do hear people say that. In both instances, it\u2019s a brain disorder. We have to remember that our brain can be dysfunctional. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI would add to that\u2014people with mental health problems\u2014they have the same spiritual needs \/ the same spiritual wants and desires that everyone else has; but they\u2019re trying to fight through an organ\u2014the same organ that we think with, feel with, connect with is the same organ we pray with\u2014that they\u2019re trying to fight through that. Their perceptions of the world are off; their perceptions of God are off.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJust to give you an example\u2014so many people that I\u2019ve worked with, that have depression, tell me: \u201cWell, I don\u2019t feel like I can pray anymore, because I don\u2019t feel worthy to come before God. I don\u2019t feel like He hears me. I can\u2019t hear Him; I don\u2019t feel Him.\u201d A lot of that\u2019s because of the negative feelings that are generated in their brain or the lack of emotion that they feel. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut they have the same kind of spiritual needs that everybody has; it\u2019s just that they\u2019re amplified and distorted. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s where the church, really, can step in, I think, and really give people a foundation for the healing and recovery that can happen.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I would say, speaking of depression: \u201cWhat if you\u2019re married to a person, who really struggles with depression? What\u2019s your responsibility, besides loving?\u201d Obviously, you have to be compassionate, caring, loving; but, just practically speaking, what can a wife do for a husband\u2026\u201d or \u201c\u2026a husband do for a wife, who has this debilitating\u2026\u201d\u2014and again, how\u2019d you describe depression, again? It\u2019s not just a sadness; it is\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>It\u2019s an overwhelming sense of worthlessness or lack of pleasure in things that you found pleasurable before. You literally have negative thoughts and feelings that occur that are outside of your control. You\u2019re constantly feeling as if you\u2019re worthless; you feel disconnected, emotionally, from the world; you just feel numb; and you simply aren\u2019t able to function normally. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think that\u2019s really the key\u2014when you cross over the line of disorder, you go from being able to function to not being able to function anymore. That\u2019s really the difference here between just being sad and being depressed.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs far as a couple goes, as I said, mental illness is like a bomb that goes off in a family. In couples, where one of the individuals has a mental illness, the divorce rate is <em>extremely<\/em> high. That\u2019s not because it\u2019s some type of absolute prophecy of doom. The problem is that, typically, people don\u2019t get help. The majority of people in the United States today with mental health problems receive no treatment.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo what happens is\u2014say a husband has depression\u2014and now, he\u2019s having trouble holding a job; and he has relational issues with his wife; and she\u2019s trying to hold everything together herself. He\u2019s not getting any treatment, so he\u2019s not getting any better. She doesn\u2019t understand what\u2019s going on; because it\u2019s not like he just wakes up one day and says, \u201cI think I have depression,\u201d\u2014he doesn\u2019t know what\u2019s going on either. She thinks he\u2019s lazy \/ just doesn\u2019t want to work; arguing in front of the kids; and then financial problems; and that leads to the divorce. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019re struggling with that kind of situation, where it seems like your spouse \/ something has changed in your spouse\u2014they\u2019re acting in a way they weren\u2019t acting before \/ they were a provider before and now they\u2019re not; they sleep all the time now when they didn\u2019t do that before\u2014they\u2019re having symptoms that you may relate to some type of mental health problem. What I would say is: \u201cYou need to get them to a physician to have a physical; and then you need to have them talk to that physician about what they are experiencing and see if they need a referral to a mental health provider.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs far as the loved one goes\u2014the wife or the husband\u2014you need to get yourself into a support group. You need to educate yourself about the problem that your loved one has. Research shows that, if an individual family member just gets into a support group\u2014a psycho-educational group, where they learn about the illness\u2014even if the loved one is not getting treatment for their illness, the loved one will show improvement. You can\u2019t do this on your own; there\u2019s no need to. You also need to get connected with a faith community that\u2019s supportive of people that are struggling with mental health problems. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDon\u2019t try to do this on your own; there\u2019s no reason to do that. Treatments are effective and they\u2019re available. They\u2019re difficult to access, but they are available.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>I\u2019m glad you mentioned that, because it seems there are treatments that are available for those who are depressed and need the help. But if you\u2019re married to someone like that, that person is impacted, like you said, dramatically. The idea of a faith-support group that\u2014isn\u2019t just spiritualizing the problem but practically talks about the impact of this on a marriage\/ on a family\u2014and hopefully, can provide understanding to know how to really love in a biblical way in the midst of that crisis.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>Absolutely. I mean, really, in a sense\u2014you know, one of the things we talk about is, depending on where your loved one is in this recovery process\u2014if they\u2019re in the distressed part of this\u2014where they are not functional, and they\u2019re really not able to care for themselves right now, and they\u2019re not getting mental healthcare\u2014the spouse has really become nothing more than a caretaker\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014you can\u2019t have a normal marital relationship. You\u2019re caring for this individual in a very physical way. You\u2019re having to take care of their finances \/ having to take care of them, physically.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Right.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>You\u2019re not going to be able to move forward until the loved one begins to get some care, and you\u2019re not going to be able to move forward until you get the support that you need. A lot of times, what I find is that the loved one is trying to relate to the individual, who\u2019s in distress, just in a normal\u2014either as a wife, or a mother, or whatever\u2014when the individual is actually needing them just to be a caretaker and care for them. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThese are the kinds of things you learn in a support group. I mean, there are all types of faith-based support groups out there that are available, probably, right around the corner from you\u2014that will really make a <em>huge<\/em> difference. I\u2019ll often say that individuals\u2014the loved ones \/ the caregivers\u2014they are the forgotten victims of mental illness. We don\u2019t do that with other\u2014you know, for instance, we\u2019re very good now with dementia caregivers. There are lots of support groups, and it\u2019s very accepted. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut for mental health problems or even addiction, a lot of times, we just kind of let those people go. We just don\u2019t think about the impact it has on their family.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>Why is that, though, with somebody who has dementia? Why does that get a preferential pass by the Christian community \/ the community of faith; and someone\u2014who\u2019s married to a person, who\u2019s deeply depressed, doesn\u2019t?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>I\u2019m not sure why. I think perhaps because dementia happens at an elder state\u2014the person\u2019s older. I think people can understand that, in a sense, their brain is kind of breaking down. But when you\u2019re younger, you know\u2014and you\u2019re in your 40s or 50s, and you\u2019re struggling with depression\u2014they look at you, physically, and they say: \u201cOh, look! He\u2019s not frail. He should be able to work. He should be able to do whatever. He just needs to get over it.\u201d Whereas, you know, if you\u2019re an 85-year-old man, struggling with dementia, people think: \u201cOh, well that makes sense. He\u2019s just getting old.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut you\u2019re right; there is no difference. It has the same effect on the caregiver that someone with depression, bipolar disorder, or schizophrenia would. When I say that\u2014you know, we\u2019re talking about marital relationships right now\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014it\u2019s the same thing for parents with adult children. One of the most things we deal with at the Hope and Healing Center and Institute are the parents of adult children with mental illness\u2014so a 28-year-old or a 30-year-old individual, who has schizophrenia or bipolar disorder\u2014and now you have an individual whose brain is literally not functioning correctly; their perceptions of the world are off, and they\u2019re an adult. In our society, we allow an adult to make their own decisions for care, even if they\u2019re delusional.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI have a client, right now, that is a 33-year-old woman, who has schizoaffective disorder, which is probably the <em>worst<\/em> of all mental illnesses\u2014it\u2019s like having schizophrenia, where you are psychotic and delusional \/ you have hallucinations; and bipolar disorder at the same time\u2014her moods swing between high, euphoric states and real low depression. She doesn\u2019t believe she\u2019s ill\u2014even though, in the same week she told me there was nothing wrong with her, she told me she had wood nymphs living inside of her. She also often thinks she has demons living inside of her, and that\u2019s why she\u2019s having problems in her life.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut she doesn\u2019t believe she\u2019s ill; and because she doesn\u2019t believe she\u2019s ill, we can\u2019t force care on her unless she\u2019s a danger to herself or others. Her parents struggle; because here they are\u2014they want to care for their daughter\u2014their daughter says she\u2019s not ill. The way we have our HIPPA and our law set up, we can\u2019t make her get any treatment. She lives in a delusional nightmare; and her parents suffer, and she suffers.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHelping the parents [is] something we can do. I can only help her as much as she\u2019ll allow me to; but the parents\u2014I definitely can get them a support group \/ offer them support\u2014and that\u2019s, again, where the church can step up and just really say: \u201cWe\u2019re going to be with you in this. We\u2019re going to walk through this nightmare with you until your daughter gives us the opportunity to get her some help.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>One of the people who has affirmed your book is Kay Warren. We\u2019re all aware of the suicide of their son. That kind of a situation causes every parent to go: \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u201cWhat could I have done? How could I have known this or prevented this?\u201d What do we do in situations, where these kinds of things happen; and as parents we go, \u201cSurely, I did something wrong here or could have made this better for my child.\u201d How do we deal with that?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Matthew: <\/strong>Yes; suicide\u2019s a really difficult thing. I think, first and foremost, I would say that suicide is evidence that people die from mental illness; because 90 percent-plus of people that die by suicide\u2014at the time of their death\u2014were struggling with a mental health problem. Kay and Rick Warren\u2019s son, Matthew\u2014he actually died from a mental illness, and suicide is just the expression of that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFirst, I would say this: I\u2019m a provider\u2014I\u2019ve worked with probably hundreds, if not a thousand, people in my life. I\u2019ve had clients die by suicide. If I didn\u2019t see it\u2014I mean, some of them, certainly, were deteriorating; we were concerned\u2014other ones weren\u2019t. It\u2019s a very difficult thing to predict. There are certainly things that you can take into account. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf your loved one has a mental illness, they are at a high risk for suicide; you just have to understand that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tPeople that are more prone to suicide\u2014or they\u2019re increasing in their likelihood of committing suicide\u2014do tend to talk about death and dying more often; you know, they say, \u201cI wish I\u2019d never been born.\u201d I often tell people: \u201cLook at the third chapter of Job. There\u2019s no better example in any textbook I\u2019ve ever seen of suicidal ideation than that third chapter, where Job says: \u2018I wish I\u2019d never been born. I wish You\u2019d taken me; I wish\u2026\u2019 I mean, he is overwhelmed; and he\u2019s expressing that. Those are the same types of things that clients will begin to talk about.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThere <em>are<\/em> some things you can look for; but ultimately, I would say this\u2014when someone dies by suicide, it\u2019s no one\u2019s fault. That individual, at the time of their suicide, believed that what they were doing was a good thing\u2014it was a right thing. It\u2019s not a reasoned decision; they\u2019re perceptions are off. People don\u2019t try to commit suicide to get attention\u2014that\u2019s a myth. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI think, if your loved one has a mental health problem, then you need to talk to both <em>them<\/em> and their mental health care provider, if you\u2019re allowed, about their risk for suicide and what you can do to diminish that. Again, that\u2019s a reason that you want to get in a support group. You also can learn\u2014when you start to see that your loved one is deteriorating, and catch it way early\u2014before they get to a point where they might be suicidal.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis: <\/strong>If I had someone, who was struggling with mental illness in my family, I\u2019d have a copy of your book, <em>Grace for the Afflicted<\/em>. I\u2019d have it open; I\u2019d be reading it\u2014two reasons: number one, I don\u2019t think we, in the Christian community, know how to process mental illness in other people. We look for categories and quick fixes. We don\u2019t put it in the same category\u2014that you just helped us think through\u2014physical diseases. Secondly, once someone is diagnosed or is just troubled, emotionally, we don\u2019t know what to do. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe want a quick, biblical answer for that and just say: \u201cPray about it. Ask God to fix you. You can do what\u2019s right. You can just <em>will<\/em> yourself past this.\u201d We\u2019re really <em>flawed<\/em> in our thinking, from a biblical perspective.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m just sitting here, listening to you, and I\u2019m thinking, \u201cWhat a gift you are to the body of Christ\u2014just to help us, as a community, to think <em>rightly<\/em> about what\u2019s going on in people\u2019s lives, who were made in the image of God.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob: <\/strong>Well, and to have the kind of information we\u2019ve been talking about this week in a book\u2014that has now been recently revised and updated\u2014I think is very helpful for pastors or for people, who have friends or loved ones, who are dealing with some of these disorders. The book that we\u2019re talking about is called <em>Grace for the Afflicted: A Clinical and Biblical Perspective on Mental Illness<\/em>. It\u2019s written by our guest, Matthew Stanford. We have copies of the book in our <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> Resource Center. You can order from us, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY to order. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAgain, our website: FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou know, the conversation we\u2019ve been having today\u2014these are the kinds of conversations, where we often hear from listeners, who say, \u201cThank you for providing us with some real help and some real hope in the midst of an affliction that we don\u2019t find help for in other places.\u201d Our goal, here, at FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> is to provide practical biblical help and hope for marriages and families on all kinds of relationship issues \/ all kinds of struggles and stresses that families face. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe appreciate those of you who make the work of FamilyLife possible\u2014those of you who are regular monthly donors, Legacy Partners, and those of you who will, from time to time, make a donation to sustain the work of this ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYour funds go directly toward the expansion of this radio program, our digital platform, the development of resources designed to help strengthen families, and the events that we host throughout the year. In fact, the vast majority of our budget is covered by friends, like you, who donate to this ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019re a long-time listener, and you\u2019ve never made a donation, today would be a great day for you to join the team. In fact, this time of year is a great time of year for us to hear from regular listeners who want to help support the work of FamilyLife. The summer months can be a challenge for ministries, like ours; so we love hearing from you during months like this.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd we have a resource that we want to make available to you. Whether you can make a donation or not, our team has developed a four-week devotional called <em>The Growing Together<\/em> devotion series. This is designed for families to do together. There are activities; there are things to read together. You can do this, as a couple \/ you can do it with the kids, and it\u2019s a free download. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGo to FamilyLifeToday.com to find out more about the <em>Growing Together<\/em> devotion series. Over the next four weeks, it will give you something that you can do together, as a family, to help focus your heart and mind on God and on His Word.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, tomorrow, we\u2019re going to continue talking with Matthew Stanford about different mental illnesses or mental disorders that people are facing today and how we think rightly about those issues. I hope you can tune in for that.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2018 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/300279","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=300279"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=300279"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=300279"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=300279"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=300279"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=300279"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=300279"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}