{"id":300237,"date":"2018-05-11T11:00:00","date_gmt":"2018-05-11T15:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/%series%\/love-lays-down-its-rights\/"},"modified":"2024-10-07T22:41:24","modified_gmt":"2024-10-08T02:41:24","slug":"love-lays-down-its-rights","status":"publish","type":"podcast","link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/love-lays-down-its-rights\/","title":{"rendered":"Love Lays Down Its Rights"},"content":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Hosea could have left his adulterous wife, Gomer, but chose instead to illustrate the extravagant love of God by continuing to pursue her. Bryan Loritts points out where we fit into the story of Hosea.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":91,"featured_media":294104,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","inline_featured_image":false,"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","episode_type":"","audio_file":"https:\/\/web.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-05-11.mp3","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"00:27:42","filesize":"25.36M","filesize_raw":"26588481","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":""},"categories":[2809,2822,2903],"tags":[4383,4382,4381,4384],"podcast_series":[7213],"cwp_profile":[8819],"series":[2101],"class_list":["post-300237","podcast","type-podcast","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-commitment","category-growing-in-your-faith","category-infidelity","tag-extravagant-love","tag-gomer","tag-hosea","tag-love-of-god","podcast_series-hosea-gomer-and-us","cwp_profile-bryan-loritts","series-familylife-today"],"acf":[],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg?w=508","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2023\/02\/image-scaled.jpg","download_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-download\/300237\/love-lays-down-its-rights","player_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast-player\/300237\/love-lays-down-its-rights","audio_player":null,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"light","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"https:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/us\/podcast\/familylife-today\/id212174303?mt=2&app=podcast","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/0j5UaKdQOHQCuo1bt0ebEm","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"},"youtube":{"key":"youtube","url":"","label":"YouTube","class":"youtube","icon":"youtube.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/feed\/podcast\/familylife-today","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"XkhW08Wx7K\"><a href=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/love-lays-down-its-rights\/\">Love Lays Down Its Rights<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/podcast\/familylife-today\/love-lays-down-its-rights\/embed\/#?secret=XkhW08Wx7K\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;Love Lays Down Its Rights&#8221; &#8212; FamilyLife\u00ae - A Cru Ministry\" data-secret=\"XkhW08Wx7K\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script>\n\/*! This file is auto-generated *\/\n!function(d,l){\"use strict\";l.querySelector&&d.addEventListener&&\"undefined\"!=typeof URL&&(d.wp=d.wp||{},d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage||(d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage=function(e){var t=e.data;if((t||t.secret||t.message||t.value)&&!\/[^a-zA-Z0-9]\/.test(t.secret)){for(var s,r,n,a=l.querySelectorAll('iframe[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),o=l.querySelectorAll('blockquote[data-secret=\"'+t.secret+'\"]'),c=new RegExp(\"^https?:$\",\"i\"),i=0;i<o.length;i++)o[i].style.display=\"none\";for(i=0;i<a.length;i++)s=a[i],e.source===s.contentWindow&&(s.removeAttribute(\"style\"),\"height\"===t.message?(1e3<(r=parseInt(t.value,10))?r=1e3:~~r<200&&(r=200),s.height=r):\"link\"===t.message&&(r=new URL(s.getAttribute(\"src\")),n=new URL(t.value),c.test(n.protocol))&&n.host===r.host&&l.activeElement===s&&(d.top.location.href=t.value))}},d.addEventListener(\"message\",d.wp.receiveEmbedMessage,!1),l.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",function(){for(var e,t,s=l.querySelectorAll(\"iframe.wp-embedded-content\"),r=0;r<s.length;r++)(t=(e=s[r]).getAttribute(\"data-secret\"))||(t=Math.random().toString(36).substring(2,12),e.src+=\"#?secret=\"+t,e.setAttribute(\"data-secret\",t)),e.contentWindow.postMessage({message:\"ready\",secret:t},\"*\")},!1)))}(window,document);\n\/\/# sourceURL=https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-includes\/js\/wp-embed.min.js\n<\/script>\n"},"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/1001\/2024\/09\/FLT-Podcast-Cover-2-508x508-3.jpg",508,508,false]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"kfairris@familylife.com","author_link":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/author\/kfairrisfamilylife-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"Hosea could have left his adulterous wife, Gomer, but chose instead to illustrate the extravagant love of God by continuing to pursue her. Bryan Loritts points out where we fit into the story of Hosea.","meta_box":{"show_notes":"","transcript_url":"https:\/\/transcript.familylifetoday.com\/fl2018-05-11.pdf","transcript_content":"<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Would you say you have a perfect marriage? Of course, you don\u2019t; but Bryan Loritts says, your imperfect marriage can still be a <em>powerful<\/em> marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bryan:<\/strong> What really makes Christian marriages such a strong witness in a dying world is\u2014not that there is two perfect people who are together \/ those people don\u2019t exist\u2014it\u2019s how we handle the brokenness in each other. It\u2019s the refusal to turn our backs and the commitment to go again. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> This is <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> for Friday, May 11<sup>th<\/sup>. Our host is Dennis Rainey; I\u2019m Bob Lepine. Bryan Loritts shares with us today how your imperfect marriage can glorify God and put the gospel on display for your family, your friends, and your neighbors. Stay with us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd welcome to <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. Thanks for joining us on the Friday edition. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>1:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGet a chance today to hear Part Two of a message from our friend, Bryan Loritts, who spoke recently on the subject of marriage. As I\u2019ve already said, he picked an unusual text. He picked the Book of Hosea from the Old Testament. There are some powerful lessons we can learn from a husband who was faithful when his wife was not. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> And Bob, the issue of unfaithfulness is\u2014that\u2019s a hard torpedo for the ship called marriage to take, but it is survivable. The only way you can survive having taken this hit to your marriage is\u2014both the husband and the wife \/ and I\u2019m saying both, not just the person who has been the offender and committed adultery\u2014they have to humble themselves, ask for forgiveness, then roll up their sleeves and begin the process of rebuilding trust, rebuilding the relationship, and taking it to a new place\u2014some place that is far different and far better than what had taken them to the place of adultery in the first place.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>2:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> I was talking to a husband, recently, who had been the offender; and he\u2019s in this process. It\u2019s feeling long and hard. He was despairing a little bit and thinking: \u201cIs this every going to work? Are we ever going to get there? Will trust ever be rebuilt? How long does this take?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> The offender, especially\u2014I think this is probably a characteristic that is true mostly of men\u2014but they want to confess it, throw the switch, and move on. They think that you can: \u201cJust admit it; let\u2019s fix this; let\u2019s declare this\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> \u2014\u201c\u2019Back to normal.\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Yes; and not realize that, when you slice someone\u2019s heart open\u2014yes; there is blood, initially\u2014but when it does start to heal, there\u2019s a wound. Then that would turns into a scar. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> The point is\u2014your spouse doesn\u2019t want things to get back to normal, because normal is what got you to adultery. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>3:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tYou\u2019ve got to figure out: \u201cHow do you get\u2014not back to normal\u2014but how do you get to a new place, where adultery isn\u2019t in the equation any longer?\u201d\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Let me just say to our listeners, here, at the beginning of the broadcast\u2014you\u2019re going to hear the second part of a great message by Bryan Loritts, a pastor on the West Coast\u2014a good friend of mine. I\u2019ve been in a mentoring relationship with Bryan for over 15 years, but let me just give you some [preventative] offense here. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGo to a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup>. Don\u2019t wait until you\u2019re marriage ship has taken a torpedo of adultery, or pornography, or some kind of unfaithfulness to the other. Invest in your marriage now and turn your good marriage into a <em>great<\/em> marriage. Don\u2019t wait until things aren\u2019t right. Go to a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em>. It is, in my opinion, the finest thing in existence to refresh a marriage; remind you of why you married one another; and to have a great, romantic weekend at a great location. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> We\u2019ve got information about upcoming <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaways on our website at FamilyLifeToday.com. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>4:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019ve never been, there are still getaways happening this spring into June. Then, of course, next fall, we\u2019ll have a complete lineup of getaways. Find out more at FamilyLifeToday.com. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAs we pick up with Part Two of Bryan Loritts\u2019 message from the Book of Hosea, we\u2019re at that point in the book where things go south for Hosea and Gomer. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Recorded Message] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bryan:<\/strong> They get married. Then it happens. We don\u2019t know how it happens\u2014our text does not tell us\u2014but it happened; because our text opens up by God saying to Hosea, as it relates to Gomer, \u201cGo again.\u201d These two words say a whole lot. The call for Hosea to go again tells us that something happened\u2014that there was a period of estrangement. Reading the white spaces of the text, it\u2019s obvious what happened. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>5:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat happened is\u2014Gomer\u2019s old proclivities came creeping back. She had an affair \/ she got caught up\u2014she got in a relationship with someone else. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can imagine Hosea\u2014maybe, he\u2019s just pulled up in his chariot, hops out. He just got finished preaching a revival. Maybe, he\u2019s running inside, excited to share what happened with Gomer on his trip only to discover another man in his bed. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019ll be honest with you\u2014I hope this is a safe place\u2014if I\u2019m Hosea, I\u2019m going to be a little relieved: \u201cI wouldn\u2019t have picked her out in the first place. God, this was your idea; and God, I know your Word, in the Torah, You not only give me a provision to divorce someone based on adultery; but you actually say, \u2018I can stone her if I want.\u2019 So, God, I\u2019m done. I\u2019m out of here.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>6:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod says: \u201cNot so fast! Remember, Hosea, this relationship is not about you and her. It is a window to My astounding love for My people. If every time you messed up, I wiped My hands clean of you, you wouldn\u2019t have made it out the first day with Me. So, what I want you to do, Hosea, is to do to her what I do to you\u2014all throughout every day of your relationship with Me\u2014go again; go again; and go again.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat <em>really<\/em> makes Christian marriages such a strong witness in a dying world is\u2014not that there are two perfect people who are together \/ those people don\u2019t exist\u2014it\u2019s how we handle the brokenness in each other. It is the refusal to turn our backs and the commitment to go again, but to do this demands we lay down our rights. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>7:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI can see Hosea saying: \u201cListen, God. You said in Your Word that if a person commits adultery\u2026\u201d\u2014and parenthetically, Jesus, in Matthew 19, gives a provision\u2014we have biblical rights. I don\u2019t think that can be legislated either way. You have to listen to the Spirit of God and what He is telling you and seek great counsel. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBut God tells Hosea, in so many words: \u201cI know what I said. [Laughter] I wrote it; but in My asking you to go again, I\u2019m asking you to lay down your rights.\u201d I can see Jesus saying, \u201cIf you want to go back to rights, you\u2019re saved because I laid Mine down.\u201d To mirror Jesus, in the context of marriage, is to lay down our rights. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>8:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWhat does it look like to love? It\u2019s strange\u2014we lay down rights. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThirdly, it\u2019s costly. Verse 2\u2014I love it\u2014right after God says, \u201cGo again,\u201d\u2014verse 2 says, \u201cSo I bought her.\u201d You\u2019ve got to understand\u2014it says, \u201cI bought her for fifteen shekels and a homer and a lethech of barley,\u201d\u2014this is telling. You\u2019ve got to understand that Gomer has gotten herself enslaved. In modern parlance, we would say she\u2019s being sex-trafficked \/ she\u2019s in bondage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThe going rate to emancipate a woman, who was being sex-trafficked, was 30 shekels. So, why doesn\u2019t the text say that \u201cI bought her for 30 shekels\u201d? Why does it say that \u201cI bought her for 15 shekels and a homer and a lethech of barley\u201d? Answer: He didn\u2019t have 30 shekels. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>9:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGet this\u2014to redeem the one who cheated on him\u2014cost him everything he had. I can see him right now, in his home, checking beneath the sofa, looking up under the bed, scraping together the 15 shekels, going to the auctioneer, saying: \u201cThis is all I\u2019ve got. I know it is 30 shekels; but what if I added a homer and a lethech of barley?\u201d I could see them right now, just bargaining. The auctioneer just says, \u201cBring what you have.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt ain\u2019t love if it doesn\u2019t cost. If you ain\u2019t paying a price at some point in your marriage, you ain\u2019t loving. See, our problem is\u2014we want Nordstrom-quality marriages at thrift-store prices. [Laughter] It costs. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf I were to stop the message right now, I would make love seem to be this spineless doormat, where you just kind of suck it up and just take it; but that ain\u2019t how our text ends. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>10:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe goes to the auction block, paying everything he had, for a woman who has wronged him. He redeems her. Then look at these words in verse 3: \u201cAnd I said to her, \u2018You must dwell as mine for many days. You shall not play the whore, or belong to another man; so will I also be to you.\u2019\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tLove is strange\u2014love lays down rights \/ love is costly\u2014but finally, love has a standard. He redeems her; and he says: \u201cLook, here\u2019s the deal. If this is going to work, there must be a mutual commitment to an agreed upon standard.\u201d Now watch it\u2014notice the order. He redeems her first and then gives the standard. Had he given the standard first and then the redemption, he would have made her redemption conditional upon her works. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>11:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDon\u2019t you see?\u2014this is salvation! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod does not say, \u201cHere\u2019s the standard.\u201d He doesn\u2019t come to Israel and say: \u201cYou know what? I\u2019ve got ten things I\u2019d love for you to do. You\u2019re in bondage to Egypt. Do these ten things; then I\u2019ll open up the Red Sea.\u201d It\u2019s not what God does. Instead, He opens up the Red Sea and then gives the Ten Commandments. Why?\u2014so their obedience would be out of delight and not duty. Or hear Romans 2:4\u2014Romans 2:4 says, \u201cIt is God\u2019s kindness that leads to our repentance.\u201d It is not our repentance that leads to God\u2019s kindness. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tSo, he redeems her and then calls her to the standard. Don\u2019t you see? For the last several minutes, I\u2019ve been preaching this thing from a secondary application perspective. I\u2019ve been preaching it in the context of marriage; but the primary application is God\u2019s relationship with us. Don\u2019t you see?\u2014we are all Gomers! \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>12:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tUntil you see yourself as a Gomer, you will be a self-righteous individual, who lords over your spouse and demands their performance; but the moment you understand that \u201cI am Gomer \/ that God has saved me by His grace.\u201d Once I get that grace, now, I\u2019m ready\u2014not to be a cul-de-sac of that grace, where it sits\u2014but a boulevard of that grace. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tDon\u2019t you understand?\u2014on the cross, Jesus laid down His rights. Don\u2019t you understand?\u2014that on the cross, Jesus took His 15 shekels and a homer and lethech of barley. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m a big Delta guy. I\u2019ve got all my miles with Delta\u2014I\u2019ve flown over a million miles with them. I\u2019ve got Diamond Status, which means I travel way too much; but it also means that, if there is an empty seat in First Class, I get it. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>13:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tNow, that\u2019s a wonderful perk until I\u2019m travelling with my wife, who has no status. [Laughter] I\u2019ve had to learn it ain\u2019t conducive to a healthy marriage for me to be chilling up in First Class, eating Biscoff cookies, while Sister Loritts, with her no-status self, is back in coach. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI\u2019m learning\u2014I\u2019m learning that, as I travel now with Delta with my wife, I need to sit with her in coach. I\u2019ll still get the upgrade, because of my status; but I\u2019ll sit next to my wife in coach, which means I\u2019m sitting in someone else\u2019s seat. Now, that person\u2019s seat I\u2019m sitting in will come at me and will start barking at me: \u201cYou\u2019re sitting in my seat. You\u2019re sitting in my\u2026\u201d\u2014and I\u2019ll shut them up real quick by giving them my First Class seat. [Laughter] Now watch this\u2014I haven\u2019t lost my status; I\u2019m still Diamond. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>14:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI just refuse to use the perks of my status for my own selfish ends. In the process, two people get blessed. [Applause] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tJesus was chilling in the First Class section of the universe called heaven\u2014saw we sinners floundering, with no status here in the coach section of the universe called earth, headed for an eternity in hell. Jesus stepped out of heaven \/ died on a cross so that we could get the upgrade back to heaven\u2014that is love. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn some way, shape, or form, He calls us to incarnate that love in the theater of marriage. It\u2019s costly, but that\u2019s what it means to be a Christian. It means we love, performance-free. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWill you pray with me? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFather, we bless You in this place today. Thank You for the gift of marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>15:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe acknowledge that there is so much more to marriage than meets the eye. Marriage is an illustration to profoundly and <em>powerfully<\/em> communicate the <em>depths<\/em> of Your eternal love to a dying world. May how we treat our spouse\u2014in some way, shape, or form\u2014tell the truth about Your love toward us. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tAnd when\u2014not if\u2014<em>when<\/em> we blow it \/ when our spouse blows it, may there be a mutual commitment to go again, and go again, and go again; because, God, that\u2019s what You do with us every day of our lives. In Jesus\u2019 name, amen. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tGod bless you. [Applause] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong> Stay right here Bryan. You know, as I was listening to this message, one of the thoughts that I had was: \u201cIt\u2019s one thing to give up your rights. When does it become: \u2018Giving up your rights becomes being trampled on\u2019?\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<br><strong>Bryan:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>16:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong> How can you tell the difference? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bryan:<\/strong> Yes, that\u2019s a fine line; isn\u2019t it? There should be\u2014I believe Ephesians 5:21: \u201cBe subject to one another.\u201d There is a mutuality there. I think if the trajectory of the relationship is one person always kind of acquiescing and giving in, I think that\u2019s when it actually becomes abusive and oppressive. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong> Yes; right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bryan:<\/strong> It\u2019s tough, because we don\u2019t want to keep a record of wrongs \/ we don\u2019t want to keep score; but we have seen those situations. I think it is more art than science. There are those heavy seasons, when the Holy Spirit is really speaking to me: \u201cYes; give your rights again, and again, and\u2026\u201d You\u2019ve got to be sensitive to that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong> Yes. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bryan:<\/strong> There are times when you\u2019ve got to go: \u201cLet\u2019s have a marital realignment session here. Let\u2019s go at it\u2014I just feel like\u2026.\u201d That\u2019s where I feel like Level Four communication, where you talk out of feelings. It helps to kind of put the person at ease and just open up your heart and share, \u201cHey, it just feels like\u2014boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>17:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong> Right. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bryan:<\/strong> Then you can address it from there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong> Yes; absolutely. Bryan, thank you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bryan:<\/strong> Thank you. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Brian:<\/strong> Thank you for your word. We appreciate it. [Applause] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t[Studio] \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, again, that\u2019s Bryan Loritts, together with our colleague, Brian Goins, who was asking Bryan the question there at the end of the message. If our listeners missed any part of today\u2019s message from Bryan Loritts, it\u2019s available online at FamilyLifeToday.com. You can stream the entire message. Again, go to FamilyLifeToday.com to find the message available there. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIt is hard for people to deal with the pain, the hurt, the betrayal, that comes when there\u2019s been unfaithfulness in a marriage; but you and I have talked to enough couples, who have figured out a way to forget what lies behind and to press on. Their marriages are better and stronger. In fact, we\u2019ve run into so many couples who are\u2014they are influencing other marriages, because of the scars in their own marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>18:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThey\u2019ve turned what was pain into something that\u2019s, not just redemptive, but something that\u2019s being used positively in the lives of other people. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> I would say\u2014if that describes your marriage right now, you ought to consider maybe taking some couples to the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> <em>or<\/em> hosting <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> small group series\u2014maybe, preventing affairs from occurring. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIn fact, I was going to ask you, Bob\u2014if you were giving advice to a young couple, starting out\u2014the best advice you could give them on preventing an affair, long term\u2014what would you say? Because I\u2019ve got one after you\u2019ve got yours. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> No; you give yours and give me a chance to think here; okay? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Okay; I\u2019m going to go back to my standard answer, and it\u2019s not trite; but it\u2019s: \u201cPray together every day.\u201d Two people, who are bowing before Almighty God\u2014you can fake it for a while; but after a while, God will show up. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>19:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tHe will tap you and say: \u201cHey, repent. Deal with it. Get real with Me, as God; and get real with your spouse\u2014together, as a couple.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI don\u2019t know of anything I could have done that could have prevented an affair in our marriage more than praying together with Barbara. I\u2019m going to tell you\u2014Barbara is my one and only. I have been faithful to her in over 45 years; in fact, coming up on 46 years of marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, I don\u2019t think I can come up with a better answer than pray; but I do think: intentionality\/investing\u2014don\u2019t let the sun go down on your anger; don\u2019t let bitterness \/ don\u2019t let isolation work its way into your marriage relationship. When you start to feel distant, you\u2019ve got two options: One is to have a little pity party and think: \u201cThis isn\u2019t fair. This isn\u2019t right.\u201d The other is to throw a flag and say: \u201cWe\u2019ve got to fix this. We\u2019ve got to do whatever it takes so that the growing isolation between us\u201d\u2014\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>20:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\u2014if there is hurt \/ if there is resentment that has built up\u2014\u201cwe\u2019ve got to address it rather than just letting it fester,\u201d\u2014because \u201cHow do most affairs start?\u201d\u2014with somebody sharing with somebody [of the opposite sex] outside the marriage about problems in their marriage. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Dennis:<\/strong> Don\u2019t ever do that, by the way. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThat\u2019s great advice\u2014what you just said. Small things can become big things if the heart grabs a hold of it and becomes embittered and hardened. That\u2019s what you don\u2019t want to have happen in a marriage relationship. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>Bob:<\/strong> Well, again, if you missed any part of Bryan\u2019s message on \u201cHosea, and Gomer, and Us,\u201d it\u2019s available, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBryan is also one of the featured contributors in FamilyLife\u2019s <em>Art of Marriage<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> video series. We\u2019ve had more than a million people, now, who have gone through this video series. Some have done it in a small group setting, and we\u2019ve got a small group kit that\u2019s available for that. Others have done the expanded <em>Art of Marriage<\/em> series as a weekend retreat for couples from their church or as a video event that they\u2019ve hosted in their local church. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>21:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>Art of Marriage<\/em> features, in addition to Bryan Loritts, of course, his dad Crawford. Voddie Baucham is a part of it\u2014Dennis Rainey, Al Mohler, Russell Moore. There\u2019s a great group of contributors who are a part of <em>The Art of Marriage<\/em>. You can find out more about it when you go to FamilyLifeToday.com. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tBryan and his wife Korie are also in our new video series called FamilyLife\u2019s <em>Art of Parenting<\/em>\u2122, and it has just been released. It\u2019s available now for small group use, or there is an online course you can go through for free. Again, find out more when you go to FamilyLifeToday.com; or call if you have any questions: 1-800-358-6329\u2014that\u2019s 1-800-\u201cF\u201d as in family, \u201cL\u201d as in life, and then the word, \u201cTODAY.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tOf course, this weekend is Mother\u2019s Day. Hope you have a great celebration of Mother\u2019s Day with your mom; or dads, if your kids aren\u2019t already clued in on this, you\u2019ve got some work to do; right?\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>22:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe don\u2019t have any of our <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em><sup>\u00ae<\/sup> marriage getaways happening this weekend as a result of Mother\u2019s Day; but next weekend, there\u2019s a getaway happening in the Poconos; and then we still have getaways happening throughout the spring. Would you be praying for the couples who are going to be attending one of these getaways over the next couple of months\u2014that God would do a great work in their marriage relationship? \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThen, let me also encourage you to be a part of the team that makes all that we\u2019re doing, here, at FamilyLife<sup>\u00ae<\/sup> possible, especially the work of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. I\u2019m talking about our Legacy Partners. These are folks who donate to support this ministry on a monthly basis. Your monthly support provides the financial foundation for this ministry to continue. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tThis month, we are praying that God would raise up 300 <em>new<\/em> families to join us as Legacy Partner families. That\u2019s just six families in every state where <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is heard. Maybe, for your state, you can be one of the new Legacy Partner families. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>23:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tIf you sign on as a Legacy Partner this month, two things are going to happen. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tFirst, we\u2019re going to send you a thank-you gift\u2014a certificate that you can use for yourself or pass on to someone else to attend a <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> marriage getaway this spring or next fall\u2014whenever you\u2019d like to use it. That comes as our gift to you when you become a new Legacy Partner. Second, your donations for the next 12 months are going to be matched, dollar for dollar. Every time you make a donation, your donation will be doubled, up to a total of $500,000, thanks to a matching-gift fund that\u2019s been established to help us recruit some new Legacy Partners. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWould you consider signing up today? Go to FamilyLifeToday.com to do that, or call 1-800-FL-TODAY. If you\u2019re interested in making a one-time donation, that donation will matched during the month of May as well. We would love to hear from you\u2014hoping to hear from a lot of our listeners this month. Again, go to FamilyLifeToday.com; or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and say, \u201cI want to become a Legacy Partner.\u201d \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<strong>24:00<\/strong>\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe\u2019ll send out that gift certificate for the <em>Weekend to Remember<\/em> to you when you sign up. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe hope you have a great weekend. I hope you and your family are able to worship together in your local church this weekend, and hope you\u2019re able to be together for Mother\u2019s Day. I hope you can join us back on Monday when we\u2019re going to talk about children who are memorizing Scripture\u2014some pretty remarkable young people, who are memorizing <em>hundreds<\/em> of verses. We\u2019ll hear about them on Monday. I hope you can be with us for that. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tI want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I\u2019m Bob Lepine. We will see you back Monday for another edition of <em>FamilyLife Today<\/em>. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<em>FamilyLife Today<\/em> is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas; a Cru<sup>\u00ae <\/sup>Ministry. \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\tHelp for today. Hope for tomorrow.\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t<strong>\u00a0<\/strong>\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tWe are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you\u2019ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider <a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/donate\">donating today<\/a> to help defray the costs?\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\tCopyright <sup>\u00a9<\/sup> 2018 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.\n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t<a href=\"http:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/\">www.FamilyLife.com<\/a>\u00a0 \n\t\t\t<\/p>\n\t\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<p>\n\t\t\t\t\t1\n\t\t\t\t<\/p>","theme_header_position":"","post_header_is_sticky":"","is_header_overlay":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast\/300237","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/podcast"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/91"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=300237"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/294104"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=300237"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=300237"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=300237"},{"taxonomy":"podcast_series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/podcast_series?post=300237"},{"taxonomy":"cwp_profile","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/cwp_profile?post=300237"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wp-stage.familylife.com\/www\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=300237"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}